Continuing On
by jrgl2012
Summary: Jasper's friend needs a place to stay, and Bella, an up comming author has an extra room. What happens when the two people meet and recognize each other, while one hates the other, but the other wants to say sorry? EXB AH
1. New Roommate

Chapter 1- new roommate

Continuing On

Bella is new up and coming author. When her best friend Alice moved out to live with her boyfriend Jasper, Jasper asks Bella to let his friend Edward move in with her. Turns out Bella and Edward went to high school together and were not on the best of term with each other. How will Bella deal with this former high school jock who is trying to get over his last relationship?

So this is my first fanfic, and I had this idea for a story and just wanted to put it out there. Enjoy :)

OH And I do not own Twilight. That goes to Stephenie Meyer. props to her

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Chapter 1- new roommate

I was pouting. Not just a little pout, but the whole sulking in the corner, my brows furrowed together, and my bottom lip was in danger of detaching from my face, kind of a thing. Oh yes I was pouting.

But I had a good right to pout, no one could argue that. For today was an end of an era, to be quoting Friends. My best friend, my roommate, and my personal stylist was leaving me today. No, abandoning me, yes that sounded better. She was abandoning me, and I was left alone. And alone I was at the current moment. I was sitting in the corner of her now near empty bedroom, on the cold hard wooden floors, just staring at how barren this place now felt. Although there was still a bed, and a chest of drawers, along with a TV mounted on the wall. But the Alice-ness that once covered this room was now gone.

Yes, I could start to feel it already. This whole apartment now felt a little more cold, or maybe I forgot to turn off the air conditioning, no, it was because Alice was leaving me. Alice. I met Alice a little over five years ago, when my writing agent had agreed to sine me. Rosalie, my agent, had been so excited when we first sat down to have our first meeting. I remember it very clearly.

(incase you didn't know, that was an intro to a flashback :p )

I sighed as I looked at the very large door in front of me. On the other side was a real agent for real authors to one of the best agency in the nation, Cullen Agency. This could be a life changing moment here, and I could so easily mess this up by having my self fall, yet injuring the other person. I know because that had happened before. But no, I was not going to fall, at least not right now, because not only had I decided to wear my comfy not so high heals, but because I was wearing my luck sleek dark blue power suit. Oh yeah, there was no way for me messing this up.

And yet I still continue to just stare at this big mahogany door. I needed to knock, to go in. The receptionist had already informed the agent that I was going to be coming in, so I can't keep stand here like an idiot. With another dramatic breath I knocked.

"Come in!" I heard a female voice say, she sounded distracted.

I opened to door to find an office that was not as large as I had imagined, and there was only one window that did not hold a fantasist view of the city. Eh, I thought, Seattle was not looking all that great right now with all the down poor of rain. There were papers scattered everywhere, and the drawers to the filing cabinet were open to reveal even more papers scattered a mess.

There was a sad little looking plant to my right, it looked like it was on the verge of death. The bad view probably did not give that much light either. The desk which was in the center of the room certainly did not look new, how ever it did match with the two guest chairs that were also mahogany like the door. The only thing that saved this anticlimactic picture was the woman standing behind the desk.

She was undeniably the most beautiful woman I had ever seen up close. She had long golden colored hair that was loosely clipped in the back, yet still trickled over her shoulders. Her frantic looking eyes were a definite stunning blue, and hid behind full lashes. She had a gray pencil skirt, which had red pin stripes, along with a matching grey blouse with red stitching. And with those fitted clothes, I could tell her body was just a perfect as her face.

Yeah, my self esteem just took a blow right there.

"Hi, Ms. Hale?" I asked tentatively. I was not quite sure of what to do, she was currently looking for something on her very messy desk.

She did not look up but continued with her search. "Rosalie." She said as she waved me, and motioned to the chair in front of her, still not looking at me. "You know I think they did this to me on purpose!" She quickly turned from me and started to look through the top shelf of the filing cabinet. "I know they give new people a hard time but this is ridicules. It is because I'm fresh out of college, and that I'm a woman. A woman who likes to take care of herself, so of course there is no way in hell that I have the mental capacity to do my job. So lets have her look for useless paper work, in a cabinet that has files dating back 20 years ago!" She slammed the drawer, and turned around and looked at me. "Who are you?"

"Isabella Swan." I said quietly, afraid to make her even more upset. Luckily for me it was quite the opposite.

She had a big smile on her face and rushed to me to shake my hand. "I'm Rosalie Hale, but please call me Rose. I don't like messing around with formalities of Mr. and Ms."

I responded to her smile with one of my own. "In that case please call me Bella."

"Right." She said as she made her way to her chair on the other side of the desk. "So let me get straight to the point here. I like what you wrote. You have a raw natural talent, and you are very clever and witty."

I smiled to myself at the compliment, but I knew there was a "but" coming.

"But." I knew it was coming, "I need something more then just humor. Anyone can be funny, just slip on a banana and you've got your self a laugh." I grimaced to myself knowing that I did once slip on a banana. "And I also have to be honest with you. This will be the first person I sine, and it must be someone great, because I need to get ahead, and be taken seriously." She waved around the room. "I need someone more then just a writer, I need the next big thing."

I felt my heart fall as I heard this. I was Bella, no one special. I was not what she was looking for.

"And I think you are it." My head shot up as I heard this, there was no way that she was talking about me. "As I read your work I could not help but wonder who you were and what you looked like. And I imagined that you to looked like every other writer out there. But just now when I saw you, I knew that this is going to work. You are different from other great writers."

I knew I must have looked confused because Rose continued to explain. "Because you are beautiful."

I let out a disbelieving laugh, and watched as Rose lifted one eye brow. "We live in a vain world Bella. And if people had to choose between a good story to read written by some plain chick or a beautiful one, I know they will choose the beautiful girl's story to read." Her voice started to get defensive. "Now if you don't believe in me, and think that I am just wasting your time-"

"No!" I cut her off quickly. "No I completely agree with you, people now a days are vain, and if you could use that to your advantage that's great. I just laughed that you thought I could be that beautiful girl." My voice died away at that.

How could she even put me in that category? There was nothing to me. Everything to me was average, my average brown hair, my average height of 5'4, and oh so average brown eyes.

"Oh," she said sounding a little surprised and relieved. "Well then, you're just stupid." She then stood up as if that solved the matter and went to her filing cabinet again to grab a thick stack of papers stapled together. She then sat back down at her desk and handed me the papers. "I am ready to sine you Bella."

I could not believe it. She really wanted to sine me, me! My short stories would be published and sold and read. I would be an author.

"However," I heard Rose say with a sigh. "This is not you typical contract Bella. I'm not asking for you first child or anything. This contract is actually pretty great, and most likely the best could be offered. But what I mean is that I am going to have to… require things from you."

Stared at Rose, she looked like she was really did not want to say it out loud. "What kind of things?" I asked slowly.

"Bella, I'm going to hire you a personal stylist, who will take care you." She sounded as if she was sending me away to a hospital.

I frowned. "When you say take care you mean…"

"I mean she will choose your clothes, and you hair style. You will get some say in the matter, but really, you need the help." Rose had a small, slightly but not quite, apologetic smile.

I thought about that. I knew I was never the most fashionable person around but, I thought I managed just fine. Like my power suit, I liked it. Ok sure it could have also worked in the 80's but hey, it brought me luck.

"I'm not going to change my morals or who I am if that is what you want. I'm not going to be the slut author. I am willing to vamp up my style, but I still want to be taken seriously as a writer too!" It was now me who was getting defensive now."

"No, no that is not what I mean." Rose responded quickly, then let out a dry laugh. "Like I would be caught dead representing some skank, even if she could right. No all I am asking to do is make you a little more urban chic. I am advertising you as a writer who's writing is not only beautiful, but you yourself are beautiful as well."

I smile then at that thought. I could handle that. "I still don't know why you think I am beautiful though, and I doubt anyone else will either."

Rose suddenly became serious. "I don't like stupidity. So I better not hear you say that again."

I smiled sadly and shook my head, but then I saw the contract and looked back up at Rose, with a real smile now. "Where do I sine?"

A couple days later Rose called me for a meeting, I was going to be meeting my new stylist. Rose had already explained to me that she was a friend from college, who was now a personal stylist. I too was her first big thing. I was starting to feel a little pressure here.

I walked up to the door again, but knocked with out hesitation this time. I could hear two voices but could not make out what they were saying. My knock had interrupted them.

"Come in!" I heard Rose say cheerfully.

I opened the door and was quickly attacked. This tinny little pixie thing had jumped on me and was now giving me a tight hug.

"Oh Bella!" I heard her musical voice sing. "I know we are going to best friends, I just see it!" She then jumped back and grabbed my hand leading me to an empty chair.

Once I was seated I looked up to see who had assaulted me. She could not have been taller then 5', she had short spiky black hair, with contrasted nicely with her bright blue eyes. She too was gorgeous like Rose, but only in her own way. She wore a simple sleeveless white top with had a scoop frill. The top had been tuck into a high waisted skirt, which did not cling like a pencil skirt, but also stopped just above her knees. She was clearly the stylist.

I looked over at Rose to find her leaning against her desk, with an amused smile on her face. She wore a very classic black dress. There were very subtle plaid patterns on it, with a thing black belt, and a scoop neck line. The dress gave her the perfect silhouette.

I then glanced down at myself. Rose had asked me to come in most fashionable, chic outfit I already owned. I wore a gray dress that had belonged to my mother, and just did not quite fit me correctly.

I heard a small squeal and I looked up at the stylist. She looked like she was about to start jumping up and down. I then wondered where the fire extinguisher was, and continue to contemplate if it would help if she decided to burst like she so desperately wanted to.

"Hi, I'm Alice Brandon, your new personal stylist!" she exclaimed while held out her hand to me. I tentatively shook it. "I already know who you are, and I read some of your stuff. You are really good you know?"

She looked at me, and waited a moment for me to say something, when I just said shy thank you, she continued. "And Rose here has already filled me in with the angle that she wants to take on you. And I must agree you are indeed beautiful."

I could feel myself go red. That was the second person other then my parents that called me beautiful. In the same week no less.

"And I can clearly see, that I have a lot of work ahead of me." she said thoughtfully as she folded her arms and stared at me.

"Wow, thanks." I said lamely, not hiding my annoyance.

Alice's smile was immediately back. "Oh I don't mean you. You are stunning. You have a rocken' body. You have your own natural blush, and full lashes, and your hair!" Alice turned back to face Rose, "I see some natural red in her hair, so we don't have to die it or anything! Style it of course but, the color stays."

Alice then turned back to face me, a very serious look on her face. "Rose also told me that you were instructed to bring the chic thing you own. When I say I have work to do, I mean this." She waved a hand at my clothes. The smile was instantly back. "This is going to be fun, I have very own my size Bella Barbie!"

And I felt the dread over take me as I heard her say that.

For the first few months it was beauty boot camp. Not only did I have to let Alice dress me up daily (Rose wanted me to get dressed up everyday so that I could get use to the type of clothes) but I had to learn about fashion too. How was I suppose to know what was in, and what was out of fashion.

Although Alice and I argued every time we would go to the mall together, we still got along, really well. The same went for me and Rose. They quickly turned into my best friends. It also helped that stories were beginning to sell. Over the years I slowly began to obtain more and more success. I was not an over night sensation, and I certainly was not a huge best seller, but I was getting my fan base, and name out there, and Rose had earned a promotion along with a new office. This time a slightly better view of the city, and a slightly more living plant.

With my success came the money. With each paycheck I would save my money, only spending what needed to be spent. The majority of my clothes or any other part of my makeovers were paid for by against. I also did not spend my money on lavish treats. No I save, and save, until two year later I had enough money to not only buy an apartment, but a really, really nice apartment.

It was on the top floor of my building, which had a private security man who checked all people who entered the building. The apartment was very wide and open, with large almost floor length windows on the wall, and skylights on the ceiling. To the left of the door are a few steps which opens to a wide room which I had made a nice sitting room, a place to sit and have a glass of wine after dinner. Next to the sitting room was the balcony which had the perfect view of the city. There was also a small restroom next to the entry of the balcony. Behind the sitting room was another room that was connected to the kitchen, only divided by a counter.

To the right of the door was the living room, which was divided by the sitting room with a wall that reached about mid length, then a clear glass to the rest the way up the ceiling. Along the glass wall I had place a very comfortable big couch which face my plasma TV. Just right of the TV was the first bed room. It was really just a miniature master bed room, with it own walk in closet and bathroom. Then next to the that bedroom was my bedroom. The master bedroom. It was very large, and had its own private balcony, but not as large as the one by the sitting room. My walk in closet was lined up with the spare room's closet, both bathroom just next to. This was nice because you could not really hear what was going on in the room next door.

When I moved in I realized just how empty this big place was. And I asked Alice to move in with me (Rose was already living with her boyfriend, Emmett. His father Carlisle Cullen owned Cullen Agency. They met a few months after Rose was hired and started dating soon after. Emmett also worked there but in a different department.)

But after two years of living with each other Alice started dating Jasper Whitlock, Emmett's friend from college who had just moved to the city. I loved Jasper, both he and Emmett were the brothers I never had. Emmett my stupid and oh so loveable brother, and Jasper, my always there when I need someone to talk to brother.

And after a year of dating, Jasper finally asked Alice to move in with him. I was not surprised. He already practically lived at the apartment, and Alice would spend days at his place. They were perfect for each other, the same way Emmett and Rosalie were perfect for each other.

So here I was, on moving day just sulking. I was being stupid, Alice was going to live in the building next door. And we were going to still see each other every day, just like we saw Rose every day, who lived in the building right across the street. We all joked that we were going to be like Bermuda Triangle.

I sighed and lied down on the floor, stretching out with my eyes closed, when I heard Alice's light foot steps walk across to me. I heard her sit down, and I knew she was staring at me.

"Who is going to dress me in the morning?" I asked as I rolled my head to the side to see Alice there, tears hinting at her eyes.

"Oh Bella, it's been five years, I hope to God by now you manage to know what matches what doesn't."

I felt my pout come back. "I'll let you dress me up and taking me shopping everyday, with no complaints."

Alice laughed and stood up giving me her hand so that she could help me up. "Now you and I both know that is not true. You will always complain."

"Ok true." I said laughing with her, "But your going to live with a boy, and they smell funny and do weird things."

"You are too." She reminded me.

I slightly frowned with that. "Yeah, can you tell me who he is again?"

Alice sighed and looked sad as she retold the story. "He is Jasper's friend, they never went to school together but they always been really close family friends. Jasper said that he just got out of a really nasty break up, he been with the girl ever since high school and he is our age!"

I thought about that. It's been 10 years since I graduated from high school, that was one long relationship. "Know what happened?" I asked, curious about this stranger.

"Yeah she cheated on him, or something like that. Anyway he just went home, packed his clothes and left. He left a message to her that she can have what she wanted, but he was leaving. He lived in Portland, I think. So about a few days ago Jasper get a phone call, in the middle of the night, and I can hear this poor guy in hysterics. This guy left everything back there. His job, his friends, Jasper said that this guy found out that all of his "friends" knew that his girlfriend was cheating on him, and even some of them cheated with her!"

"No!" I gasped, and felt my heart tug for this stranger.

"Yeah, so now he needs a place to live while he get things set up. He want to live here, get away from it all. So that is when Jasper thought of you. You need someone to live with you, and it's even better that it's a guy, now that your getting bigger your going to need someone to protect you. And Jasper would never think to ask you if he thought this guy was dangerous or weird. And it is definitely not like you don't have the money."

"Yeah, he won't have to pay rent, but once he gets a job, I'll start him small, like paying for the water bill or something." I felt horrible for this guy, but I also did not want him to get use to living for free off of me, especially when I don't even know him.

Alice looked at her cell phone which lit up telling she had a text.

"Oh that Jasper, he says that he and his friend are on their way up."

I followed Alice to the door. This was like a blind date, only I was not going to date him, and he was going to be my roommate. Oh jeez here come the butterflies.

The door opened just as I was walking out of my kitchen, water bottle in hand. I saw Jasper walk in, holding a duffle bag in his hand. He motioned for his friend to follow.

Then I saw the one person I thought I would never see again. Edward Masen.

SO i hope you liked it. I know my spelling sucks but I try.


	2. old acquaintances

Ok, so here is chapter two for ya

Ok, so here is chapter two for ya. But I just want to say thanks to everyone who read this. I was all smiles yesterday, and still today. So thanks to you all!!

Lets see… I do not own Twilight. But I do want to kidnap it, who is with me?!

Chapter 2- old acquaintances

I could not believe it. Edward Masen was standing in the entrance to my apartment. What the hell was he doing here? I could feel the old anger start to bubble in my chest. My breathing slowed down and my eyes narrowed. Why was he here? Why was this jackass in my apartment? Then it me, _he_ was suppose to me my new roommate!

I could only vaguely hear Jasper introducing him to Alice; the anger was making mind unclear.

"Alice," started Jasper, "this is my best friend Edward." Jasper turned around and spoke to Edward slowly, as if he were speaking to a frighten child. "Edward this is my girlfriend Alice."

"Hi Edward," Alice said in a hopeful voice, "It nice to meet you, Jasper only says great things about you!"

Until this moment Edward had kept his eyes on the floor, a look of anger and heartache printed on his face. He glanced up at Alice and didn't even attempt to smile, just nodded his head once and went back to glaring at the floor. Still the same rude, self-centered pig from high school.

I looked at him a little more clearly, trying to look past my irritation and see him. Well he was still gorgeous, that much had not changed from high school, even if he did look like crap right now. His bronze hair, which was always a mess and yet still managed to look perfect, was plaster to his head right now; soaking wet from the rain out side. I could not see his bright green eyes for he continued to look at nothing but the floor. And I could not help but wonder if they were as dazzling as I remembered them to be. I could however, see that he had dark circles under his eyes, and speculated on when was the last time he slept. His clothes were also soaked through and also clung to his body. All I could make out from the rags that he wore was that he had on a faded black shirt on, with a dark green hoodie over, in a fail attempt to keep the rain at bay. He also wore dark black pants that slopped over his waterlogged shoes.

Although he was still the most striking man I have ever seen, he looked like he was in bad shape.

"And Edward," Jasper guided him a few steps down to me by the kitchen. "This will be your new roommate, Bella Swan."

I didn't say anything, I wanted him to look at me, and I wanted to see his reaction. Would he remember me? Would he feel bad for the past, or would he just rule it off as being an immature high school student?

He must have been waiting for me to say something, for after a few second he looked up at me with slight confusion mixed in with his angry. Then he paused as he stared at me, the anger faded for a moment from his face and he raised one eyebrow.

So he did recognize me, that's good. At least I would not embarrass myself while trying to remind him who I was.

His surprised face went quickly back to the painful anger, and I remembered that the heartbreaking story that I heard just a few moments before was his story. And my own personal anger faded as I bore in mind that he was the one who had just lost everything.

After a few awkward moments, Jasper continued on with introductions. "And Bella this is Edward Masen."

I kept my gaze on Edward's face, continuing to debate with myself if I should be compassionate or if I keep my old high school grudge. I sighed in defeat, who was I kidding? This poor guy needed help; I'll give him crap later once he is doing a little better.

"Yeah, I know who he is." My voice came out harder then I intended. Ok so I would have to work on being nice. "Hey," I said more softly.

"You know each other?" asked Alice as she clung to Jasper's arm and continued to stare from me to Edward, trying to see what our relation was.

"We were friends back in high school." It was the first time Edward spoke, and by how ruff it sounded, it was the first time he had spoken in a while, yet somehow it still held the feel of velvet.

Just when I decide to give the guy a break, he goes and pisses my off. "I would not have called us that." I said harshly. "We were more _acquaintances_ I guess."

His head shot up and he stared at me confusion and frustration mixed in those damn green eyes of his. Yeah he was probably starting to remember high school more clearly. "I'm going to go get cleaned up. Which one is my room?" The frustration had crossed over to his voice as well.

"That one," I pointed to the door across from us, "The one next to the TV. There is everything you need is in there; shampoo, soap, bed, sheets, towels, TV. Make your self comfortable." I could hear my voice strain as I tried to keep control.

He just looked at me, nodded his head, then glanced over at Jasper and mumbled a goodbye. He left a water trail all the way to his door, and on my hard wood floors. I let out an exasperated sigh and dove into the kitchen.

"Well that was interesting." Alice said as she followed me, Jasper right at her tail. "How do you know him, I mean all he said was that you guys went to high school together, and you just kept throwing him glares. Did you two date back in high school or something?"

"God no!" I practically yell, as I grabbed a hand towel and headed back to the trail of water Edward had left.

"So then what happened?" I could hear the slight demand in her voice.

I paused and listened for the confirmation that the shower was running. I got down on the floor and started wiping up his mess, I hope this douse not become a habit for him.

"You know that I moved the Forks my junior year right?" I asked, whipping the floor with more energy then necessary.

"Yeah, you went to go live with Charlie," answered Alice who was now sitting and the small steps by the entrance with Jasper right next to her also listening.

"Well I was not the most popular girl there and Edward was the captain of the basketball team." I now taste the venom that I put behind my word; I really did not like this side of me.

"Yeah, I remember that Edward had helped lead the school to win state championships all 4 years," added Jasper, "He won prom king and all that stuff. He was the golden boy."

I nodded remembering how the whole school had practically worshiped him. "We had a few classes together, and unfortunately were paired up together for projects. I thought he seemed like a nice enough guy, even if he did have a bitch of a girlfriend. We would talk a lot when we were in class together, but other then that he really stuck with his own group. So I was surprised when he invited me to a party he was throwing."

The floor was completely dry now but I kept scrubbing away at it. "Lets just say that once I arrived, me being there had not gone over well with his friends and he just let me embarrass my self as I tried to convince the people there that I really had been invited."

I could feel my cheeks turning red, and my stupid eyes start to water up. I hated the fact that the moment that I became really angry, my eyes would instantly start to flood.

"Well high school was not all that fun after that." I said ending my story.

"Oh Bella," Alice rushed over to my side and gave me a hug, pulling me away from my assault on the floor. "I'm sorry that must have been horrible."

I gave her a weak smile and just shook my head. "I'm being stupid; I mean that was high school, 10 years ago. I know I should be over it, but some of that stuff sticks with you."

"No, no that is completely understandable. But look at where you are now, and look at where he is. You are the successful one here. And look at him. I'm sure he has changed since then, and look at where he is right now; he needs help." Alice had spoken softly, yet her words were hard to me. I needed to be the bigger person right now, I needed to help him.

"You don't have to." I heard Jasper say softly. He looked at me and I could see the concern written on his face. "I could take him in, it would be tight with the three of us living together, but Bella you don't have to help. It is not your place to help him."

I felt bad now; I didn't want to ruin Alice and Jasper moving in together. "It's alright. Alice is probably right; he must have changed since high school. And I have more then enough room for the two of us." I stood up, and pulled Alice up with me. "I can help him."

Jasper walked over and gave me tight hug. "Thank you Bella."

I hugged him back and I could feel the smile light my face. "It no problem," I pulled away and looked at my friends. "Now don't you two have a dinner reservation tonight? You guys better go; you don't want to be late."

Alice gave me another reassuring hug, while Jasper wished me luck. I walked to my room and on the way I could hear that the shower had been turned off, and the TV was on to some sports game.

I jumped on my giant mattress let out a breath that I had been holding. So I was going to be taking care of Edward Masen. I wondered as to how this was going to work out, and I could not help but think back to the first day I met him. Wow, I reminiscing a lot today.

(Flash back)

It was my first day of school, in this miserable little town of Fork, Washington; it was everything that my life back in Arizona was not. Forks had my dad, while Arizona had my mom. This place rained, a lot, practically everyday. It is actually the most rainy place in the United States, I would know, I Googled it. The school that I was going to was also very small. My class alone back in Arizona was bigger then the whole of the school here. The only thing that was beginning to salvage this disaster of a day was that my dad, Charlie, had bought me a truck. A cool old school Chevy truck that could kick any other car's ass in an accident.

However the moment I entered my new school all chances of a good day was gone. Every single person was staring at me. And I am not being dramatic, even the janitor was staring at me!

I could feel my cheek burn as I hurried along to my class, trying desperately to avoid all eye contact. Classes were not so bad, as long as I ignored everyone as they gawked at me. I did make one friend though, Angela. How we managed to start talking to each other in class was beyond me. We were both very shy people and speaking to strangers was not really a great past time for either one of us. It was not until I got to biology that things got interesting.

It was in this class where I discovered who the most popular boy in school was. I had heard people talk about him throughout the day, and it was his name that I had found interesting. Edward. It was such an old fashioned name, the kind of name that Jane Austen had used in her books. And yet he did not change it to Eddie or, use some other nick name.

The teacher had asked me to sit in the table at the back. I was very relieved, class was about to start and no one had sat in the assigned seat next to me. I rested my head on the table and closed my eyes. No point in watching everyone watch me.

"Having a ruff first day?" I heard a velvet voice say.

I peaked one eye up from my arm to see who the owner of the beautiful voice was. No surprise it belonged to a beautiful boy. He had perfectly messy bronze hair, which scattered in front of his green eyes. When I saw his eyes I had to remind myself to breath. They must be contacts; no one could have such green eyes.

The eyes in question looked down at me with amusement glinting in them. I tore my stare away and continue to look at the rest of his face. He had a crooked little smile which reflected with the same amusement that his eyes held. He had a slightly form fitting dark blue shirt on, and also had fitted dark jeans on.

Oh dear God, I was going to have to sit next to him for the rest of the semester! Either fate was playing a really cruel joke, or I was the luckiest girl right now.

A pretty little blond girl in a cheerleading out fit had just run into the class and made a B line right to my table, her eyes fixed on the perfect boy standing next to me.

"Oh Edward, you forgot to kiss me before you left." She threw her arms around him and gave him deep kiss. I then decide that fate was playing a cruel joke one me.

"I'm sorry baby, I thought I was going to be late to class," said Edward as his wrapped his arms around the girl. "But now you're going to be late."

"It was worth it as long as I get to see you for a second." She purred into his ear.

"Well you will get to see me for a lot more then a second tonight; my parents are out of town…"

Should I cough or something, because clearly they forgot about me, or in her case, probably didn't even realize I was there. I pushed my head into the desk, hoping that it would drown out the two of them talking. Oh no, did I just hear her say something about leather?

I shifted my arm so that it covered my ear, but right as I did, I accidentally pushed my book off with my elbow, landing straight onto the girl's foot.

"Oww!" she screamed, "What that fuck?" she looked down as me and clearly now just realized that I was there. "When did you get a lab partner Edward?" her voice all of sudden sounded very accusing. "And why didn't you tell me it was a girl?"

For the allegations just made, I was surprised at how calm Edward spoke. "This is the new girl, and I only discovered this about ten second before you came in."

The bell rang, signaling that there was one minuet left before class started. "Oh I have to go baby. I love you!" the girl said, her voice no longer angry.

"I love you too Loren." He said with such conviction, that even I swooned a little in my seat. And after a few death glares in my direction, she left.

Edward took his seat next to me, right as the teacher walked in. For that day in class we were suppose to be doing a lab. It was a lab that I had done back home in Arizona, so I did not worry too much. I was shocked though when I realized that Edward did not have trouble with this lab either. So there might be some brains underneath that great head of hair of his.

I tossed my pencil in my bag right as I was finished writing the last little bit of information from the lab. I looked around and realized that we were the first ones finished.

"Hey, I'm sorry about earlier." I turned and saw Edward facing me, sounding truly apologetic. "I completely forgot that you were there, and I am now just realizing what you must have heard." He let out a little chuckle.

"Don't worry; I was ignoring you, just as you were me. I can already see that this is a beginning of a beautiful friendship." I rolled my eyes; I doubt he even knew that I was quoting a move.

"I like Casablanca too." He said coolly. "But I am sorry. I was just about to introduce myself to you before. Hi, I'm Edward Masen."

He held out his hand to me, and I debated if I wanted to give him some snide remark. I sighed and decided against it. "Hi, I'm Bella Swan."

"Aww, yes Chief Swan's daughter. We all know about you, only we have never seen you. You lived with you mom?"

"Yes." I said shortly looking away from him, and just stared at the front of the class. I did not like the fact that I might have been the talk of the town, or that I sounded like some dirty secret.

"So why did you decide to move to Forks?"

"Long story," I said, still not looking at him.

"We have time." He gestured to the clock which was on the wall right behind us.

"My mom got remarried."

"And you don't like him." He stated; not really a question.

"No, I like him, Phil's cool and everything only he travels a lot." I turned back to face him. "My mom stayed homed with me, and I could see how much it was hurting her to be away from him, so I decided to come live with Charlie instead, so now she can travel as much as she wants."

"That was not very fair," he said simply.

"Well incase you have not heard, life is not fair." I said rather glumly.

"Actually I heard all is fair, at least in love and war."

After that class I found out that he was also in my English class which was right after biology. And yet again we were assigned to the same table, being automatic partners. We talked every day about life, music, movies, and even surprisingly, books.

"You know, you are actually kind of smart." I said with disbelief one day. I had already been living in Forks for three months. Although Edward and I never talked or acknowledge each other out side of class, we were always engulfed in discussion the moment we were both seated.

At this moment we were talking about the prose and cons about the ending to the book Wuthering Heights.

"I should feel insulted right now." He laughed, "But I can see that you are giving me a compliment right now, so I'll take it, seeing as I receive so little from you."

"Hey, someone here has to keep your ego in check." I said mater-of-factly.

"Yes, where would I be without that someone?" he continue to chuckle as he lounged in his chair, waiting for the teacher to call the class to order.

"Probably floating off to space somewhere, with how big you head would have gotten." I laughed as I had a very cartoon looking image of Edward off in space, his head the size of a blimp.

"So I owe you for saving my life basically?" he continued.

"Basically." I nodded my head in agreement.

"So what type of payment would you like, I hate owing anyone anything."

I placed my hand on my chin and posed as if I was deep in thought. "I believe a life time of servitude will suffice."

Edward let out a loud laugh and few kids in class turned to look at us. "How about an invitation? I'm having a party this weekend; it's going to be pretty cool. You should come over."

I rolled my eyes, "Right Edward, you are really inviting me to a party where _your_ group of friends will be. Ok, sure." I felt a little bitter; there was no way that I could be able to go to one of his parties.

"No, I'm serious Bella," his eyes now full of excitement. "I think you should come, my friends would love you! I don't know why I didn't think of this sooner."

"Look, Edward, I'm fine with whatever kind of weird friendship we have here. We talk in class and outside of class you go your way I go mine. Why push it? I mean I highly doubt that I would get along with your friends, I'm surprised I can even tolerate you." I added jokingly.

"Why wouldn't my friends like you? You're smart, funny, interesting, and have great taste in music."

"I highly doubt what you find interesting, they will find interesting. How many of them know who Debussy is, or who Blue Oyster Cult are? Which of them can tell me how many Bronte sisters there were? And how many of them would think it's funny if I knocked down their precious ego of theirs?" I shook my head sadly. "No Edward I think it's better if we leave it as is."

"Look I want you there. You are one of my friends ok?" By the tone he was using I could tell that he was very serious.

"Alright." I agreed. "I'll go." And with that we had to shift our attention back to class.

It was Saturday day night, the night of Edward's party. I looked back down at the instructions that he had written the day before, and I was starting to panic, thinking that he had given me some bogus direction so that I could get lost in the middle of the woods. And that is where I felt like I was right now, like I was just driving around lost in the woods. The only thing that gave me hope was the path that I was driving on.

After a few more panicked minuets, I turned to see a very large house that rested in a clearing. As I walked up to the front door I thought that this house seemed more of a mansion then a house. I could hear the music from inside, and I could even smell some alcohol as I got closer to the door.

I stood there for a few moments. What was I suppose to do? Do I knock, or should I just walk right in? Once I'm in, where do I go? Who should I hang out with? I could not hang around Edward the whole time; he had his girlfriend to attend to. I would be at the bottom of the list.

My mind continued to come up with some more worries for what I should do once I'm inside that I realized that I needed to get inside first. So without further hesitation, I opened the door.

There was a light layer of smoke in the air, smoke from what I did not know. I could tell that if there were not a bunch of teenagers hanging around that this would be a very wide, open living room.

A few people glanced over to see who had just walked in; all of them had to do a double take when they realized it was me. Where was Edward, if I could just get to him and then people who could see that I had been invited and was not just some lame looser crashing their party.

More and more people were starting to stare at me, and whispering with an unhappy look on their face. I still stood at the entrance awkwardly, debating if I should just run. The kitchen, they have food and drinks in kitchens, so maybe Edward was in there. I went off in the direction that I hoped was the kitchen, when a large group of people cut me off. They all stood in front of me, glaring.

Loren was one who stood closest to me, and the one who spoke. "Swan, what are you doing here?"

"I was invited." I said quietly, but also could not help but wonder why I was there.

"Who invited you?" she scoffed as she looked me up and down, eyeing my plain white T shirt and blue jeans.

"Edward." I hated how my voice seemed to louse volume each time I spoke.

"Right!" Loren started to laugh, along with some other people behind her. "My Edward invited you, Bella Swan," she said my name she was speaking about disgusting pile of garbage. "to this party. Now, why don't I believe that?"

"Look," I said, my voice finally gaining some volume, along with the tone of defiance. "Believe or not, I don't care, but Edward did invite me to this party."

"Why would he invite you?" asked some kid who I did not see. I looked around me and realized that this party had just been stalled; practically everyone was starting to gather by me.

"Because," my voice cracked from the pressure of being the focus of everyone's attention right now, "because we are friends."

Everyone started laughing at that. A string of, "yeah rights," and "You friends with him?" started to fly from every direction. I could feel the stinging tears in my eyes as I grew angrier. Where was he? Edward would be able to tell them to shut up.

"Lets ask him!" some male voice yelled, followed by a cheer of agreement. "He here is," said the same voice.

"What's going on?" I heard Edward say as he made is way through the large group which had formed a type of circle with me and Loren both in the center. The moment he saw me, realization hit him.

"Edward," Loren said in a girlish high pitched voice. "Swan here has some kind of crazy idea that you invited her."

"Oh, she did?" he stuttered as he kept his gaze on me. I too stared only at Edward, trying to plead with him to clear this up. "Why would she say that?"

I felt my jaw drop. What was he doing?

"So you didn't invite her?" Loren said loudly, making sure everyone could hear.

"She must have heard me mention the party while I was talking to someone else." Edward looked away from me now. "Why would I invite her?"

"Because we're friends!" I yelled at him. "You told me that I was your friend." Bit my lip so I could try to fight back the tears that were in danger of poring over.

"Are you two friends?" asked Loren in such a condescending tone that I wanted to smack her right there.

Edward let out a little nervous laugh, "No, we are barely even acquaintances."

I had stopped breathing, and my vision was now getting much more blurry because of my tears, no long being held back. "You bastard." I whispered. Then I turned and made my way back to the door, trying frantically to block out everyone's laughter.

That Monday at school, everyone had seemed to have heard about my "attempt of crashing a party". At least that was what everyone was calling it. Everywhere I went people would make some comment about how I better not try to get into one of their parties. Some people even walked up to me just to specify to me that we were _not_ friends. However none of that compared to what happened once I reach biology.

Edward had walked up to our desk quietly, and I didn't look at him. After a few minuets, he finally spoke. "Bella?" I looked at him, waiting to hear what kind of excuse he would be using. Instead he just said, "I forgot to do my home work last night, so your going to have to review with someone else." And with that he just looked at the front of the room, never to glance in my direction again.

I was tired as I left gym, my last class of the day. It seemed like everyone had gained up on me as we played basketball. Even my teammates had managed to hit me a couple times with the balls today. I was the last one to leave the locker room, when I was stopped my gym teacher.

"Bella could you do me a favor?" she asked. I nodded. "Could you walk this paper down to the office? I'm running late for a meeting."

"Sure, no problem." It delayed me from hiding at home, but by now most of the kids on campus had left, so I should be safe.

I opened the door to the office, and froze as I saw Edward huddled over the counter, talking to the woman behind the desk.

"I know we have only two more months before school ends," said Edward, he sounded very frustrated and angry. "But I need to transfer from those classes."

"From your Biology and English class, correct?" asked the secretary as she looked at her computer.

I felt my heart drop. He was trying to transfer out of the two classes that we had together. Well he managed to wreck my life in high, his job was done. Why else would he want to stay there?

Rage started to flow through my veins. I walked right up to the counter and slammed the paper on the counter; causing both Edward and the secretary to jump.

"Mrs. Roe wanted me to give you this." I said flatly. I looked up and saw Edward staring at me, wide eyed. I glared at him, wishing that all my fury could be seen on my face. I then turned and made my way back out, familiar tears making there way back up.

"Never mind then." I heard Edward say to the secretary as I left.

We never talked. We even did labs in Biology with out talking. Kids continued to make fun of me till the end of the school year. At least the next year, my senior year, people seemed to have forgotten. But I never did. We were in three classes together that year, luckily we were not assigned to sit next to each other. And yet every time I would see him, a part of me would miss our conversations, and another part of me wished that I had never moved to Forks.

(end of flashback)

Well that was depressing memory. I got up from my bed and made my way into my closet, changing out of my clothes, and into my pajamas. Well were not really pajamas. I had on short maroon colored booty shorts, and a white spaghetti strap top.

I was going to have to talk to Edward about it. I would need to if I was going to be living with him. I climbed into my bed; my giant light blue, fluffy comforter helped me blend into the bed. That was going to make one interesting conversation.

I definitely do not plan on reminiscing each chapter, I'm just trying to get everything out there. Hope you guys enjoyed this!!


	3. Tip Toeing

Hey people! So I want to start by giving a shout out to the people who have left me a review, you all seriously made my day when I read them. and if i knew how to e-mail you guys a thanks, i would. :) Thank you guys so much! And also thanks to anyone who reads this, you are all awesome.

Second. I am now just kind of getting use to the whole posting and editing thing. Those lines that separate the page are tricky. But thanks for bearing with me. I will continue to try.

Now lets get down to business. I, sadly, do not own Twilight.

* * *

Chapter 3- Tip toeing

I had already been up for two hours, and I was yet to leave my room. I had taken an extra long shower; blow dried and straightened my hair, and had already changed from three different outfits. I ended up deciding on wearing a pair of designer jean (the only kind Alice would let me wear) and a plain black T shirt that I had hidden away from Alice. I even re organized my drawers and bathroom cabinet.

I know that last night I had decided that I would have to talk to Edward about high school, and I would; it is just that I had not specify when. It didn't have to be right now.

I did not have any where to be on this lovely, only slightly rainy, Saturday morning, so I could not make a mad dash to leave the apartment with a valid excuse. Alice and Jasper had decided to spend the day together, their first day of living with each other, so I definitely would not be hanging with them. Rosalie and Emmett were at some kind of outing that Emmett's parents were hosting.

Normally on days like theses I would just hang around the apartment, enjoying the time to myself. However I could not just hang around, not with Edward here. Not when I was suppose to be avoiding him.

My stomach made a very unpleasant sound reminding me once again that I was starving. With finding out that I was living with Edward, I had forgotten to eat dinner last night, and my lunch yesterday had been a bight off of Alice's apple (thinking that I was going to be going out to dinner with my new roommate). So really I was just working off of yesterday's breakfast, a bowl of coco puffs.

I walked over to my bed and lade down, face first, and closed my eyes trying to stubbornly ignore my hunger. I could see the headlines now:

"Up and coming author dies of starvation while stubbornly locking herself up in her room, in her own apartment. Authorities suspect foul play, and begin to question her friends."

I rolled over so that my legs were now dangling off the bed. Well I would not want my friends to be harassed by the police so I better go get something to eat. (At this point I was willing to take any kind of reasoning to eat.)

I pressed my ear up to the door to see if I could hear anything signaling that Edward was out there. Nothing. Slowly I opened the door about an inch, just so I could let one eye look out. There was no one on the couch, and I don't think the TV was on. I opened the door a little more and stuck my head out. Nothing.

Opening the door a little more, I slipped my body through the limited space I had given myself, and snuck through the living room. I felt like I was Scooby Doo, trying to hide from a monster. After stealthily making my way to the entrance of the kitchen, I pressed my back up against a wall, like a cop would do before storming a room. I was really watching way too much Law and Order.

After one last final dramatic evaluation of my kitchen, I realized that Edward was not there. He must have still been in his room. I looked over at the clock. It was already 10, so he could have easily already gotten breakfast. But there were not any plates in the sink, nor in the dishwasher. So maybe he had not gotten any breakfast yet, maybe he was putting it off like I was.

So then was he avoiding me? But I was supposed to be the angry one. I was supposed to be the one making a fit about our living together until he apologizes. I huffed as I started to scramble some eggs, too hungry for just cereal. Maybe he would be able to smell my breakfast, and be so hungry that he had to come out and face me.

I ate my food so slowly that by the time I was taking my finishing bights, my eggs were already cold. I had strained my ears trying to pick up some kind of noise that would tell me that Edward had left his room. Still nothing.

After washing the dishes in an agonizingly slow pace, I made my way back to the living room. I stood by the couch and wondered what I should do next. I was not in the mood to write, and did not have a deadline, so I decided to read a book.

As I walked by his room, I could not help but slow down, and just stare at his door, hopping that evolution would kick in, and I would be able to see through walls. Nope, still no x-ray vision. I quickly grabbed the first two books off my night stand and made my way back to the couch, closing the door to my bedroom a little louder then normal.

I looked at the first book that I grabbed; Sense and Sensibility. Cool, I like this book. However after a few chapters I remembered that one of the main character's name was Edward, and I childishly threw it to the other side of the couch. I then looked at the second book, Memoirs of a Geisha. Ha! No one name Edward in this book.

A few hours had past, and I was reaching the middle of the book when I realized that Edward had yet to leave his room. And I still could not hear any noise coming from his room. I wonder if he was even here.

I stood up, and stretched my now cramped up legs, and walked up to his door. Very careful not to make any noise, I placed my ear up to his door; a feeling of de ja vu from just a few hours earlier hinted at my mind. Still nothing!

I walked into my roomed and slammed the door behind me, unsure of why I was angry. I was going crazy. That was the only solution. From the moment I woke up this morning all I could think about was Edward. I grabbed a stylish knee length black rain coat and scooped up my purse. I quickly scribbled a note on a peace of paper.

**I've gone out. Not sure when I'll be back. Here is my number if you need anything.**

Alice and I had always told each other when we would go out, where we would go out to, who we would go out with, and what time we would be back. It was always good to have at least one person always know where you are.

I quickly slipped the paper under Edward's door, and left the apartment as fast as I could. I had not realized how over heated I was until I stepped out side. The cold air mixed with mist slapped me back to reality. I had completely over reacted this morning. Come on, the guy had just broken up with the girl he had been dating for over 10 years, there was probably not any room for him to be concerned about my begrudging him.

I was not exactly sure of where I was walking to; I was just letting my feet take me wherever they wanted to go. I let my mind roam off on a story that I had thought up a few days back. By the time I reached the book store I had already develop a ruff plot out line in my mind. I looked up and laughed as I saw the book store in front of me. There was really no surprise in my subcontinents wanting to read more.

An hour and a half later, I was sitting in one of my favorite cafes, eating a Caesar salad, and completely engulfed in my book. It was not until a familiar ring tone brought me out of my reading daze.

"Hey Alice," I said without even looking at the caller ID.

"So, how are things going? Tell me everything." Jeez it had not even been 24 hours and she wanted all the details I could give her. "How is he?"

"Well, I would not know," I said bitterly. "I have not seen him _all_ morning. He has just been locked up in his room all morning. I'm over at my café right now, so he might be out and about in the apartment."

"Bella," I can tell by the tone in her voice that she was about to scold me, "You can't just leave him. He douse not know anything about this city, or douse he even have a house key?" I didn't say anything. "Bella! So you basically just left him trapped in your apartment, while go out. That is not how the Bella I know would behave."

"Your right," I said sadly, "I'll make an effort, I truly will."

"Good, now I have to go Jasper is calling back to bed." I heard Alice let out an inappropriate giggle.

"Go! I don't want to hear that!" I laughed.

Two weeks had gone by, and still nothing. Ok that is not completely true; I did talk to him once. I was leaning on the counter in the kitchen, munching away at some cereal when I heard heavy foot steps. I looked up to see the same beaten down Edward that I had the first day, only this time he was dry, and it looked like he had not shaved in a couple days.

"You know," I said, trying to keep my voice light. "I heard a rumor that I had a roommate, but I did not believe it though. I mean it's been a week and a half since this alleged roommate moved in, and I have not seen him." I gave him a friendly smile (I did tell Alice that I would try) "I guess that it's not a rumor after all."

"Yeah, sorry," he said, but I could hear that he did not mean it.

I placed my cereal down on the counter and grabbed a key that I had sitting next to it. "I wanted to give this to you, face to face." I handed out the key to him. "Welcome roomy."

He just looked at my hand, which was palm side up, the key laying flat against my hand. After a moment he took it, and mumbled a low "thanks." Then he grabbed something from the fridge which I could not see, and headed back to room.

There were times when I could hear him. When his shower was running or when the TV was on, but other then that, there were really no sings that Edward was living with me. Every now and then I would think that he was not even in the apartment. I didn't have any proof, and he could have easily have left while I was at a meeting for work or shopping with Alice, but I had a feeling that he left at night.

"Ghosts interact with people more then Edward douses with me. I talk to my security guard more then I talk to Edward. I have voted more times then I have been in the same room with Edward!" I was sitting in Alice's apartment right now; shopping bags from our trip to the mall that day surrounded me. "Alice, it has been three weeks since he moved in and still nothing!" I threw my arms up, completely exasperated. "What's up with this guy? What did Jasper say after he came over to visit him?"

Jasper had come over several times each week, and had talked to Edward; each time I had left to go run some errand so that they could have some privacy. However Jasper had not been over this week, his job had sent him away. Jasper worked for the local museum verifying that the peaces they were given were legitimate, right now he was away to see about a peace that wanted to be donated.

Alice was up and about folding and dividing our clothes. She let out sigh, "Each time Jasper came home he was always really bummed out. He said that it really did not look like Edward was doing any better, if anything he looks worse."

I immediately raised my hands as if someone was pointing a gun at me. "Hey, it has nothing to do with me. I have not even pushed the guy to say a word or even be in the same room as me, let alone tell me anything. I don't even know what he douses for a living."

"Jasper said that he was an accountant or something like that, but Jasper always knew that it never made Edward happy. So Jasper told him that now was the time to find out what he really wants to do, what is his passion." Alice held up two shirts, each the same style, only different colors, one yellow one red. As she examined the shirts she continued talking. "Jasper also told me that they use to be really close friends; did you know that Jasper lived in Port Angeles, that's just a few hours away from Forks right?"

I was surprised by this, Jasper knew I was from Forks, I wonder why he never said anything about us having lived so close together. "Yeah, it is."

"Hmm" Alice threw the yellow shirt in her pile, and tossed the red one over to my pile. "Yeah, well I guess that this last year they kind of lost touch with each other. Edward's ex girlfriend never like Jasper much; at least that is what he believed."

"This is pathetic," I said as I got up to help her fold our now separated clothes. "I just found out more about Edward in this past minuet from you, and I have been living with the guy for the past three weeks."

"Give it time Bella, he will come around. Hey, did you bring those shoes that I wanted to borrow?" asked Alice, her voice going from deep concern to excitement.

"No, sorry I completely forgot. Do you want to come over and grab them now?"

"Sure, I'll help you bring over your bags!"

As always, when I open the door to the apartment, the place was empty and quiet. At least it seemed empty.

"Hello!" called Alice, sounding very chipper.

"Alice," I hissed, "what are you doing?"

"I'm being friendly," she said, walking off to the living room. "Edward we're home!"

I stood there, listening. If he responded to Alice and not me, after living with me all this time, that was going to piss me off. After a minuet went by with no responce I looked over at Alice and mouthed "see?"

"Hold on," she mouthed back. "Hey Edward, are you here?" she called very loudly, making sure that if he was here, he would hear. The second dragged on, and yet Edward still had not said anything. "Do you think he is here?" she asked while she stared his door.

"I don't know," I said at normal volume.

"Edward if you are here, give us some kind of sing". She yelled, looking up at the ceiling.

"Alice it sound as if you are trying to call a spirit or something." I rolled my eyes. "Edward, one last chance; are you here?" I yelled.

"One last chance for what?" asked Alice.

"I don't know, he just needs to be concerned that it is his last chance." I shrugged.

"Oh!" Alice's eyes lit up with amusement. She headed over to his door, and placed one hand on the handle. "Edward, are you in here?" her voice sounding very sing-song.

"Alice!" my voice back to a harsh whisper. "Get away from that door!"

Alice just giggled and ignored me, "Edward, if you are in there, open the door."

I glared at Alice as I took an involuntary step forward. "What if he is in there, and can hear us?" I asked, my cheeks starting to turn red as I imagined what we must sound like to him.

"Oh, he is not in there; I doubt he is even home." Alice waved her hand, dismissing my question. "Isn't that right," she said at full volume again, talking to the door. "If you were in there you would have opened the door by now."

"How sure are you that you are not make a fool out of us?" I crossed my arms; I hope he hears how I'm the sane one here; that is if he is in there.

"I am a solid 75 sure that he is not here." Alice nodded her head and then continued to look at the door.

"Great," I said my voice seeping with sarcasm. "So then that leaves me with a 25 chance of making myself look like and idiot."

"Bella," Alice sighed as she turned around to face me, "With you there is always a 100 chance of embarrassing yourself."

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"Besides, it doesn't matter who you are, if you heard this conversation going on outside your door, wouldn't you want to stop it?"

I thought about how annoying we must sound to any on lookers. "Ok, I'll give you that one."

"Good," said Alice, a wide smile on her face as she brought her hand back up to the door. "Then we are going in."

"Alice!" I yelled, while jumping to her side. "We cannot go in there."

"What? Why not?" Alice looked at me, true confusion written on her face. "I thought we just specified that Edward was not home?"

"We did," I brought my face closer to hers, whispering again, although why I was whispering I did not know, it was obvious that we were the only ones here. "That is his room. Whether he is here or not, we can't go in there without his permission. That is invasion of privacy, you can go to jail for that kind of thing… I think."

Alice just rolled her eyes at me while she tightened her grip on the doorknob. "Bella, this is your apartment, you can go in whatever room you want."

"Alice, I don't think you would have appreciated me snooping through your room while you were living with me."

"First off," she lifted her hand and extended one finger, "We are not snooping; we are just opening a door that happens to lead to his room. There is no crime in opening a door. Second," she extended another finger, "If I was showing sings that I needed help, like Edward is, then I would expect you to snoop in my room, although that is not what we are doing."

"I don't know," I could feel myself beginning to break. "I just don't feel right about this."

Alice let out a frustrated sigh, "How about you just tell yourself that we are going to check the water pressure in his shower."

I blinked, "Why, is it having problems?"

"Bella!" Alice yelled at me, "I don't know, that is why we are going inside to check, ok?" she looked at me, trying to communicate with her eyes.

Then it downed on me, "Oh, right." I let out a nervous laugh, "Yeah, the water pressure, I heard something saying that you need to have just the right amount of water pressure in order to truly relax."

Alice rolled her eyes and mumbled, "Whatever gets you in there…"

From where I was standing I could not see the Edward's room as Alice slowly opened the door. "Oh my God," she gasped.

I stepped to the side to see inside. "Oh no," I moaned.

The room was indeed empty, well empty of Edward at least. However it was completely packed. The basic lay out of the room had not changes, the bed across the room, facing the TV which rested on a set of drawers that was right next to the door.

The bed was completely unmade. The sheets were strewn all across the bed; the comforter was not even on the bed anymore. Instead it was off to the corner as if he was trying to make a makeshift bean bag. The pillows were now across the room, to the other side of the door. I could not help but think if he had thrown them there himself. His duffle bag rested next to the comforter, and what little clothes he had brought with him were pulled out and spread on the floor in the corner.

However what truly had me concerned was not how messy his living habit were, is was the countless number of bear cans scattered the room. Along side some of the bear cans were bags from take out or fast food, all not even being bothered to be picked up. Well this at least explained why I had as much food as I did; and I had thought he was just a light eater. The window by the bed was open, allowing the smell of bear and grease to be carried out.

"Wow," I whispered, not knowing exactly what to say.

"Yeah," responded Alice, equally at a loss.

"Didn't Jasper ever tell you how bad it was in Edward's room?" I could not imagine Jasper forgetting to mention this detail.

"No," Alice shook her head while continuing to stare at the scene ahead of us. "He said that they always would just hang out in the living room. He has never seen this." Alice waved her hand around.

After a few more minuets of letting the shock seep in, we finally began to walk around, being careful not to step on anything.

"What do we do?" I asked. How were we supposed to help someone like this? I did not even know what this is.

"Should we clean up a little?" asked Alice, who was now lifting up her foot and examining the bottom of her shoe to see what she had just stepped on.

"If we do clean, then he is going to know we've been in here." I responded, still at a loss.

Alice looked at me and shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, but we need to talk to him now, let him know we know. He is going to find out eventually."

"I already know," said a deep angry velvety voice.

* * *

So I know, not much going on here, but it needed to be done. I'm building a base for my next chapter. The name to the next chapter is called "Blow Out". One guess as to what is going to go on there. haha

But let me give you something to think about while I write the next chapter. Why is Edward doing even worse since living there?

Anyone who guesses it correctly will get a virtual high five from me. haha


	4. Blow Out

So I have heard talk of a Beta, something that I need desperately. Haha, I am currently in search, and I really do not know how this works, but I did find the beta section, but I also wanted to just throw this out there…

**Anyone want to be my beta?** Go ahead and just let me know, and you will make me a happy camper. Until then I continue to apologize for my spelling, grammar, est.

Oh boy, I have a lot of thanks that I want to send out there. I think I have just figured out the whole E-mail thing, so I hope to write to everyone who has reviewed so far, and tell them that they are awesome.

I had a lot of good guesses on why Edward is upset. Go ahead and read to see if you got it right!

I do not own Twilight, but I do own a pair of fluffy white slippers.

* * *

Chapter 4- Blow Out

I froze. My eyes widened, my limbs stiffen and although I had stopped breathing, my heart started to race out of control. I hoped beyond all hope that if I just did not move, if I stood really still…

"Why are you guys in my room?" I heard Edward say, crushing my unrealistic hope.

Slowly I turned around, glancing at Alice as I did so. She looked just as alarmed as I did. Good, it was her fault we were in here. Why did I listen to her? I should have just given her those damn shoes and kicked her out. Finally as I finished my very hesitant turn, I gulped when I saw Edward.

He did not look full out angry, more of a quiet anger; like a menacing threat within the shadow. However it made me all the more panicked. He wore the same dark green hoddie that he had worn on his first arrival. Underneath the hoodie he wore a fitted dark maroon colored shirt, which rested right above his black jeans. In his right hand he held another six pack of beer, and in his left hand he help a McDonald's bag; the grease stains already marking the bag.

When my eyes reached his face I had to let out a sad little sigh. I knew how beautiful he could be, and it pained me to see him be turned into such a tattered beauty. The dark circles which I had seen on his first day were now even more pronounced. Although he may have been spending all his time in his bedroom, he was clearly not getting any sleep. It looked like he had given up on shaving all together, and the light stubble that I had seen a week earlier was growing more defined.

At least he seemed to be taking showers, or that is what I could tell by his clean hair. However it looked like he had given up all together on even attempting to tame his hair, leaving it completely at a disarray. The only thing left that held Edward's true splendor were his green eyes. Though at this particular moment they held anger in them, they were still absolutely beautiful.

"What are you doing in my room?" he asked again, speaking slowly to make sure we had heard him.

"We were checking your water pressure." I said too quickly.

"Yeah!" piped in Alice, "You need the right amount of water pressure in order to relax properly, or something like that." Alice looked at me, "Isn't that what we heard Bella."

"That is correct." I tried to clam down my breath. I was a horrible liar, I knew it, Alice knew it, and by the look on Edward's face, he knew it too.

"Water pressure?" he asked, raising one eye brow. Did he look slightly entertained? Or was that just the lighting?

"Yep." I squeaked.

A full agonizing minuet went by, and yet no one said a word. The air in the room seemed to have grown stale, even if there was a window open.

"Well," said Alice, looking over at me, a cowardly smile on her face. "I think I'm going to head home. I'm expecting a phone call from Jasper tonight; I would not want to miss it." She walked over to Edward and patted him on the shoulder; she had to reach up to do so. "I'll see you another time Edward, goodbye."

Edward gave her a nod, and then went back to starting at me. However I was too busy glaring at Alice to pay any attention to him. 'Don't do it.' I said in my mind. 'Don't you leave me here to face him!'

Alice mouthed me an "I'm sorry".

'Traitor!' I yelled in my mind, 'you get back here, you damn little pixy traitor'. With one last apologetic smile she bolted out the door. I could hear the front door closing a few seconds later. Shit.

"So how is my water pressure then?" I heard Edward say, there was definitely some amusement in his voice.

Shit, shit, shit. "Umm, good?" Gah! Why did that have to come out like a question? Couldn't I just lie properly like a normal human bean?

"Good," his voice went flat, "then if you are finished checking that everything is working properly, you can leave."

I did not move, "Edward,"

"Don't." he cut me off. All amusement had disappeared from him.

"Edward we need to talk about this." I looked around the room and at the six-pack in his hand.

"We don't need to talk about anything." He said, making his way past me to the small night stand, kicking at the trash on the floor.

"This is not healthy." I my voice set; I was ready to argue if I needed to.

Edward ripped a beer away from the carrier. "I don't really give a damn about my health right now." With a loud snap, he opened the beer can and stared to drink.

I marched over to him and snatched the can away from him. I grabbed the other beers and walked out of the room, heading to the kitchen.

"What the hell?" I heard Edward say in disbelief behind me, too stunned to realize what I had just done. By the time realization had donned on him, and had followed me, I had already begun emptying out the beer cans.

"What are you doing?" he yelled from behind me.

"Sorry, but I would prefer to talk to you while you are sober." I said simply, while I trashed the now empty cans.

"I am not talking to you." He said through gritted teeth.

I turned around, and was a little surprised by how close he was to me. I took a step back only to be trapped by the counter. I took a deep breath and said, "Yes you are. We can talk either here or in the living room, I would rather we sit in the living room, make myself comfortable, because I have a feeling this is going to be a while."

Edward narrowed his eyes at me. "What if I don't talk?"

"Fine" I said loudly. "Then I'll talk, but you sure as hell are going to listen to me." I glared right back at him.

We had a staring match for a few second, then Edward let out an irritated sigh and mumbled, "Man, you are stubborn."

"Yeah," I said as I headed over the large couch, "It is only one of my many charming qualities."

I sat on the couch and looked up at Edward. He just looked down at me, unsure as to what to do. I patted the seat next to me, trying to encourage him. After a hesitant instant, he sat down.

"Loren." I said, wanting to see his reaction to the name. Just as I expected his brows furrowed and a dark feeling over took his demeanor. "Is a bitch." I finished.

He looked up at me with a questioning look on his face. "Jasper already told us." I told him, "How she cheated on you with your friends, and how you left everything behind." Edward looked at the floor and began to glare. "And I am sorry, I truly am." I said in a very soft voice. "No one deserves to go through that, to louse and be betrayed by everyone that you had loved. I understand that it takes time heal, but what you are doing is not the way."

"How would you know?" asked Edward, his voice coarse. "Have you even been cheated on by the one you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with?"

"No," I said quietly. "But I have been hurt, and I have been betrayed." I saw shame over take his face as he looked up at me. I shook my head. "That is for another time. But what I'm trying to say is that I know what it is like to heal. Trust me, it seems a lot harder then it really is."

"But I loved her; I thought we were going to get married." he said, although if it was direct towards me or to himself, I didn't know.

""If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger"" I said. "It's from Wuthering Heights."

"I know where it is from," he said, looking up at me. "Why are you quoting it?"

"Well, is the universe a might stranger to you?" I asked, cautious as to how I worded what I was trying to say.

"But I've lost everything," he said quietly.

"Yeah, but have you lost the purpose of what makes your world go on? Do you continue to be?" I held my breath, hoping that he was taking me seriously.

"I do continue." I said firmly, with a hint of surprise in his voice. "Loren is not my other half."

I leaned back into the couch a smile on my face. "Good, I believe we call that an epiphany."

"No," Edward said slowly, "I think I've always kind of know. My parents were old fashioned; get married and start a family as soon as possible kind of a thing." Edward started to shake his head, and let out a dry laugh, "I always told them that they messed me up by raising me as if we were from the early 1900's."

"There are some good values to learn from the early 1900's, like you always held the door open for any girl back in high school." I reasoned.

Edward took a deep breath, and leaned back into the couch. "I probably would have realized this sooner if Loren wouldn't keep call me."

"What?" I said, shocked by this new revelation. "How long has she been calling you?"

"Everyday." I saw Edward's face darken. I knew something was wrong.

"Why douse she keep calling you?" I asked.

"At first it was to apologize, telling me she loved me, and how we were meant to be together." He laughed. "She said she just wanted to talk to me, face to face." Edward went back to glaring at the floor. "But then she started saying that she was going to burn everything I had left. I told her to go ahead, that I had brought everything that I wanted." I saw Edward's face start to contort in pain. "But then she reminded me that I forgot to bring one thing with me."

I waited for him to continue as he stopped and took a deep breath. "My parents died about five years back."

"Oh Edward," I gasped; I leaned over and grabbed his hand, "I'm so sorry."

He gave me a feeble smile, "It's alright, I have dealt with it." He took another sturdy breath, "My house back in Forks caught on fire; it took them and almost everything with it. Only a few things remained; some pictures, my old baby blanket, my mom's engagement ring. She must have taken it off for some reason, because it was not by where they were."

My heart broke as I saw Edward try to regain control. "Everything that I have left, I keep in a box. I forgot that box back in Portland, and now Loren is threatening to trash what's in there if I don't go down to see her."

"What?" I yelled. And I thought I was just dealing with a broken heart here. "She can't do that! Would she do that?"

"I have seen Loren upset before," he looked over cautiously at me, and I knew he was referring to the party. "And she douses not always play fair."

"But if she is trying to prove to you that she," I put my hands up and made quotation marks, "Loves you" I folded my arms, "then how douse she think that this will help her case?"

"I don't know, Loren was never… stable." Edward looked off, probably thinking back to all the times Loren had gone crazy on him.

"Why did you stay with this chick?" I asked, not really expecting an answer.

"I thought that was what you were supposed to do, marry your high school sweet heart." He shrugged.

"I always knew she was a bitch," I mumbled as Edward rolled his eyes. "So what are you going to do? You have to go back and get your box." Whether Loren was going to destroy it or not, the fact was that inside that box were the last mementoes that Edward had of his family, he needed to get it.

"That is what I have been debating." Edward sighed, "She has been threatening me for about two weeks, and I don't know how much longer I can push my luck with her. I already tried reasoning with her to just send it to me, but she said that she wants to speak to me face to face." Edward looked at me, a slight desperate look on his face. "I can't _see_ her; at least I can't go on my own. I was going to tell Jasper about this, and see if he could come with me, but now he is out of town…"

"I'll go with you." I said.

"What?" said both Edward and that little voice inside my head.

"I'll go with you and give you moral support." I feel my cheeks start to blush, what if he said he didn't need me, or want me there.

"Would you do that?" I heard Edward whisper, a stunned look on his face.

"Yeah," I waved my hand as if is was literally brushing away his question, "I just have to double check with Rose to make sure that I don't have any meetings for the next couple days, and we could drive down, it is only a couple hour dive. We could actually leave first thing in the morning as long as we pack tonight."

I made sure to keep my voice light, trying to make it sound more hopeful, instead of the panic from rejection that I truly felt. I waited for Edward to respond, but instead he just stared at me.

"I mean, if you do not want me to go with you, if you want to wait for Jasper that's cool. I don't have to go…" I let my voice trail off. What was I thinking? I could not just invite myself to go on what was sure to be a very emotional trip.

"No, no," Edward said quickly, "That would be great to have you come. I'm just surprised." I felt my face flame as Edward stared at, trying to look for something.

"What?" I let out a nervous laugh, "You don't think I have a nice side to me."

Edward gave me a small smile, not the one that I remembered, but it was still enough to bring some life back into his face. "No, I'm surprised that you would do that for _me_, especially after everything I did."

"Oh…" I said quietly, "Yeah, well you don't have to worry about that right now, you have more important thing for you to be concerned with." I looked down at the floor; I was going to have to put my own issues to the side right now.

"Bella, that has been a concern of mine for over 10 years, we need to talk about this." I could hear the true concern in his voice, and I knew he was not lying.

"I don't want to talk about it right now." Just a few hours ago I had been set to just sit down and talk it out with him, and now I just wanted to say good night and hide in my room again.

"Fine," Edward said imitating me from earlier, "Then I'll talk, but you will listen." I could just hear the smile in his voice.

"Well aren't you stubborn." I said, repeating what Edward has said earlier.

"Yes it's a quality that I find very charming." I looked up and saw Edward grinning at me.

"You just want to get everything out in the open, don't you?" I said unable to stop myself from grinning right back.

Edward just shrugged and said simply, "I figure it's about time."

"Alright if we are really going to this, then I need to go get a cup of tea to help replenish my energy." I stood up and headed to the kitchen.

I stirred my tea around in the cup, trying to mix the sugar I had just added. I took a gulp and enjoyed the burning liquid travel down my throat. I grabbed my cell out of my pocket, and pressed speed dial for Rosalie.

Three rings went by before she answered, "Hello, Rosalie Hale speaking."

"Hello, Bella Swan speaking," I answered back.

"Oh, hey Bella what's up?"

"_Is that Bella?"_ I heard Emmett say through the line.

"Yes it's Bella," responded Rosalie.

"_Tell her I say hi!"_ Emmett said eagerly.

"Bella, Emmett says hi."

"_HI Bella!"_ I heard Emmett scream into the phone.

"Ow Emmett that was ear!"

"Oh, sorry Rosie, here let me kiss it and make it better."

I heard Rose star to giggle, and let out a little moan, "Rose, I did not call to hear something I would off a 900 number!" I yelled.

"Oops, sorry Bella, what's up?"

"Nothing," I sighed, "I was just checking with you to see if I had any meetings that I needed to be at for the next couple of days."

"Nope, not till next week. Why, are you planning to go somewhere?" I could practically hear the wheals in her head turning. Rose basically controlled my schedule and always knows where I was going.

"Yeah, I'm going to Portland with Edward tomorrow." I tried to say as casually as I could.

"What? When did that happen?" I had been keeping Rose up to date with all the details on the whole Edward situation.

"Just now, I'll explain more when I have a chance, I'm about to go talk to him about the whole party/high school thing."

"Wow, well good luck with that."

"Thanks. Hey, could you call Alice and fill her in for me; she just left me hanging when Edward caught us in his room."

"What, you were snooping in his room?"

"Just call Alice, she will fill you in. I've got to go; I'll call you tomorrow when I get in to Portland ok?"

"Ok, just be safe."

I smiled, as I heard her concern. "Will do, bye."

I hung up my phone, grabbed my cup, and headed back to the couch; ready for round two.

"So did I hear something about a 900 number?" asked Edward, I could tell he was trying to stop himself from laughing.

"I was talking to Rose, my agent, and when you meet her you'll understand." I took a moment to think exactly how Edward would fit in my group of friends. With Edward it would finally make it and even amount of guys and girls. Well the guys would be relieved that they were not out numbered by the girls now.

"Bella," I heard Edward say. I looked over at him, and it felt like I was in high school Biology all over again, waiting to hear his explanation; only this time I was prepared to be disappointed. He took a breath and slowly let it out, "I am sorry." And he was, I could hear it in his voice that he was sorry, but right now it just did not seem to be enough.

"I…I don't," Edward let out a disbelieving laugh. "I have been practicing this for over 10 years, so that if I ever had a chance to sit you down and apologize and explain, you would receive the truest apology that you deserve." He looked at me; the intensity of his green eyes did not allow me to question him. "Bella, I am so sorry. I was young and stupid; you deserved to have been treated much better then that." He closed his eyes and shook his head, releasing me from his grasp. "But I don't want to blame my actions on adolescence."

"Why," I said quietly, "Why did you even invite me in the first place?"

"I did want you there Bella, I really did." Edward leaned closer to me. "I had even imagined how I wanted it to go. You were supposed to show up, and dazzle them with… well, you just being you."

"So it's my fault that I did not 'dazzle' them as you had planned?" I could feel the old anger rise in my chest.

"No," Edward said swiftly, "What I had not planned on were for my friends to react the way they did. I had thought they were going to be more open, to be more…"

"Like you," I said for him. "Ok, I get that then. I understand the expectations you had for them, but what happened when I needed your help; what happened when I needed you to full fill the expectations I had for you?"

Edward's face fall as he saw my eyes start to water, "I'm sorry Bella. I know I can never say it enough, but I am sorry." Edward looked down at his lap, too ashamed to meet my gaze. "Here is where I do not have an excuse. When I saw you there, and when I realized what was happening, my first instinct was to go along with what I knew was safe, and going along with my friends what was safe."

"But what about when you tried to transfer out of our classes? Did you really want to make sure that you were not seen with me?"

"No, Bella, I was too ashamed to go back to class and face you. I thought that you would not want to be stuck sitting next to me after what I did. But when I saw you in the office, and how livid you looked, I told myself that I would apologize to you before the school year ran out, so I stayed."

"Well you didn't reach you goal." I mumbled bitterly.

"Nothing I came up with seemed to be a sufficient apology." He said gently, "I wanted to make it right."

I wanted to tell him that he had shattered my high school experience, to tell him how many times I had cried over feeling like an idiot, or how many times I had question myself afterwards. And yet, I could understand what he was telling me.

I could sit here and judge and scrutinized at what he had done wrong, but if the situations were reversed, if I had been the one who had to introduce the outsider to my friends after seeing them already not reacting well to them; would I have been any different from Edward. I could go ahead and tell myself, that I am bigger person, that I would have been at my outsider friend's side at a moments notice. But the truth remained that I would never know how I would have reacted. So who was I to judge? All I could do right now was to accept his apology, and try to become his friend again, only this time away from the pressure of high school.

I looked at Edward again, and I could feel the earnestness in his apology. "Bella, I am sorry." He said again, although it was no more then a whisper, I could hear the power from his words.

"It's ok Edward," I said, "I understand, and I accept you apology, thank you."

He leaned away from me, almost a little taken aback. "You do?"

"Yeah, you were not the only one who had 10 years to think about this." I added with a light smile.

"Bella, I'll make it up to you…"

"No," I cut him off, "you don't have to, I really do understand."

Edward leaned back into the couch, and stared at me. "You are too good."

"Not really," let out a malicious smile, "I originally had planed for you to completely recover from the whole break up thing, and the moment when you though you had your life back on track, I was going to crush you with guilt."

Edward smiled, although it did not reach his eyes. "A much more suitable course for dealing with me."

"Yeah, but it's not my style." I shrugged. I looked over at the time, it was already 11pm. "So we should get ready to pack after we're done."

"Done with what?" asked Edward who had followed my lead by standing up stretching.

"Done with cleaning you room." I told him, "Unless you want to smell like a frat boy?"

Edward laughed. A real laugh, one that I had not heard from him since he had moved in. "No, I am do believed that I am finished with that life style."

"Oh, why, it seemed like such a fun way to live." I said sarcastically.

"Beer and fast food gives you the worst stomachache," he said patting his stomach, "You have not seen the bathroom yet, I don't know how many bottles of Pepto Bismol I went through and are lying around in there."

I could not help myself from laughing with him as I went off to help clean his room and pack for the road trip that we would be leaving for first thing tomorrow morning.

* * *

SO, I think it is safe to say that you did not see that coming :P Haha. Yes that is why Edward has been doing worse since living with Bella. He needs to go back and get his box, but he really douse not want to see Loren, or go alone. He feels bad about the whole Bella party thing, but like Bella had said, he has more pertinent things to think about.

And don't worry, Bella might have forgiven him, but he has to make it up to her somehow.

Just incase you do not know what 900 numbers are, there just sex talk lines.

The name of the next chapter is "Road Trip"

I hoped you enjoyed. Until next time then… :)


	5. Road Trip

Ok, so here is chapter two for ya

So this is definitely a longer chapter, but I just felt weird about splitting it up, so I just bunched it all together. Not much to report on this end except…

YOU GUYS ARE ALL AMAZING!!

But I think you already know that.

And I also think you already know that I do not own Twilight. But I have to put it out there just incase. Haha

enjoy :)

* * *

Chapter 5- Road Trip

You cold say that the morning got off to a rough start. I originally wanted to leave at 6 am sharp so that we could make it to Portland around 10 am, however Edward and I had not gone to bed until around 2 am. His room was much more filthy then I had thought, and he was right, there were little pink bottle hidden everywhere in the bathroom. As we cleaned he continued to look over at me, give me a shy smile, and apologized for his mess. I did not mind helping though, we talked for a little, but we were both tired and just cleaned his room in a comfortable silence.

However the trouble started when I rolled over in my bed and saw the bright red numbers on my alarms clock saying 8 am. I jumped up from my bed and ran into my bathroom to quickly get ready. I wrapped my hair up in a messy pony tail, and threw on a pair of shorts, and put on a plain black zip up hoodie. Although I had spent 5 years with Alice, I would still revert back to my comfortable clothing whenever I have a chance.

I grabbed my overnight back and placed it by the door, and ran into the kitchen to make some coffee. I looked around and could not see any sings that Edward was up. I rushed over to his door and knocked rampantly.

"Edward," I yelled through the door, "Are you up? We have to go." I waited for a moment, fearing that Edward might have relapsed.

"Yeah, come in!" I heard him say as I let out a very relieved breath.

I walked in and smiled as I saw how clean his room was. Not only had we just picked up the trash, but we also scrubbed down every inch trying to purge the room of any negative memories. Aww, he even made his bed this morning; I wonder how long that was going to last.

I could hear water running in the bathroom sink; good at least he was up too. "Edward did you see how late we are, I'll have to call the hotel and change the check in time." I had made reservations on-line the night before to the Hotel Vintage Plaza.

"I can't hear you," I heard Edward yell, I could faintly hear music going on in his bathroom, he must have found the old boom box that Alice had left. "You can come in."

I walked over and opened his bathroom door, "I said that I need to call the hotel…" I drifted away. Edward was leaning over the running sink, shaving cream covered half his face, the other half completely smooth. But what had literally stopped me in my tracks was how he was dresses, or really not dresses. He had on a pair of very snug jeans that rested right on his hip, which I could see clearly since he did not have a shirt on. His abs were perfectly defined and I could see each muscle from his six-pack clearly, even if he was at rest right now. His chest was broad and his shoulders and arms were lean. This was the clear difference from the Edward that I knew in high school, and the Edward that was standing in front of me; he was a man now.

"See something interesting?" asked Edward. I looked up and saw him staring at me, very entertained.

"Yes actually," I said coolly, "How the hell do you not have some kind of beer belly after eating and drinking crap for three weeks straight?" Ha, good save.

"I still worked out, I went out running every night." He shrugged and went back to shaving his face.

"I knew you snuck out of here at night," I mumbled to myself. "Anyway, do you think you will be ready to leave in ten minuets? I'm getting the coffee ready if you want some."

"Sounds good, and I will be done in five minuets." He said as he rinsed his raiser.

The second issue that I had not foreseen was which car we were going to take. I did not even know Edward had a car, although it did make since; after all how else did he leave Portland. So here we were arguing over whose car to take; his little shiny Volvo, or my cool Ford Explorer Sport.

"My car has better fuel efficiency," argued Edward.

"But my car has more room!" I argued back, folding my arms.

"Why douse that matter? Are you planning to pick up some hitch hikers along the way?" asked Edward.

"No," I said mumbled, "but if I wanted to, I'd have the room." Crap, I was lousing this argument.

"Do you really want to spend all that money on gas?" he asked raising one eye brow.

"No," I said quietly as if I was a child who had just been in trouble.

The third issue happened once we were on the road. I had plugged in my I pod to his adapter and was about to choose the music; Edward wanted to drive the first half to Portland, he said something about him being a better driver which I responded with by hiding his car keys, delaying us another ten minuets.

"I'm just going to put it on shuffle and see what comes up," I said as I set my I pod. The first song came on and I immediately started to bounce along with the beat.

"_Henrietta we got no flowers for you  
Just these three miserable cunts  
Sitting on the back seat turning on the off beat"_

"The Fratellis?" questioned Edward.

"Yeah, what's wrong with them?" I asked. They were one of my favorite bands.

"They are too… off." said Edward.

"Ok," I sighed as I pressed the next button.

"_I don't practice Santeria,_

_I aint got no crystal ball,_

_But if I had a million dollars, _

_I'd spend it all."_

"Skip," said Edward in a board voice.

"It Sublime!" I yelled, "They are a classic."

Edward shook his head, "Skip."

"Fine, then what do you like?" I pressed paused, filling the car with silence.

"The Reconteurs," he said simply, keeping his eyes on the road.

"Oh please," I rolled my eyes, "They are so generic, the only good songs that they have are the once written and sung by Jack White." I pressed the next button, "I'll jet go onto the next song then."

"_I'm hot, your cold_

_you go around, like you know_

_who I am, but you don't_

_you've got me on my toes."_

"What?" yelled Edward, causing me to jump and look around to see what was wrong, "The Joan's Brothers, you have the Joan's Brothers on your I pod?"

"Only this one song," I said feeling relieved, "and it's not a bad song, it's actually really fun."

Edward shooked his head then looked at me, mock disappointment written on his face. "You use to have good taste in music, what happened?"

"Hey, I am willing to listen and like any song, from any genre, I do not discriminate." I defended. "But here, how about Franz Ferdinand, do they match your standards for music?"

"Yes they do."

The rest of the drive continued on the same way, both arguing over which band was better or worse. We agreed most of the time on music, we both were going through an English band faze.

By the time we arrived it was only 11 in the after noon. We pulled up the valet, and I jumped out of the car and began to stretch. "You could have pulled over for a break at least once on the way here," I complain. We had driven the whole way straight, not stopping once. That car did have good gas mileage.

"Yeah, but look at how quickly we got here," offered Edward as he grabbed both of out bags and followed me into the lobby. However I did not pay any attention to how the lobby looked like, I focusing on not peeing my pants. "Just use the restroom here," whispered Edward from behind me.

"No," I said through gritted teeth, "We are almost at our room, I can hold it." I always had issues with using public restrooms, if I absolutely needed to I would, but I would not use the public restrooms right now, not when I was so close to our room.

I walked up to the receptionist, a pretty blond girl who had her hair pinned up. I gave her a friendly smile as I walked up to her; I was surprise to see her respond as she glowered at me. Wow, what made her so upset? She looked me up and down as if you were examining the enemy. Seriously, what was wrong with her? But as we finally reached the desk, she looked up at Edward and gave him the warmest smile she probably could have mustered. Oh, she thought we were together.

"How may I help you?" she asked in a too sweet voice as she looked at Edward.

"We have reservations," I said interrupting her gaze which earned me another glare. "It is under Isabella Swan."

"Swan?" she asked flatly. I nodded my head. She looked at her computer, and a smile lit up her face, "You asked for the double-double room correct? Two beds, two sinks?"

"Yes, I did." She was gave me a happy smile and went on to charge me. I hope that this would not be a regular thing. And yet, as I grabbed our room key and quickly headed towards the elevator doors, I noticed almost all the girls stare at Edward in aw, and looked at me as if they wanted to kill me.

I stood in front of the elevator, doing a little dance trying not to pee my pants. I noticed Edward looking at me, trying not to laughing. "You look like an idiot," he finally said, out right laughing.

His laugh was contagious, and I started to laugh right along with him, "Ow, stop it, your going to make me pee my pants." Edward snorted as we stepped inside the empty elevator and started to head up.

"You know, I think you are going to have to get ugly again," I said to him, trying to change the subject.

He looked over at me and raised one eye brow, "I don't know which question to ask first, why do I need to get ugly, or when I have I been ugly."

I rolled my eyes, "When I say ugly, I mean zombie Edward, the person you have been the last couple weeks. And as to why I believe you need to look like that again, it is for my own safety."

"Oh, and what are you endanger of?"

"Did you see those girls down there, they looked like they wanted to rip my head off just because I am walking with you." The elevator doors open, with a loud "ding" and I sprinted in the direction of where our room was and opened the door making a B line to the bathroom.

Once I was done, I walked out to see what our room was like. The walls were yellow, and the red curtains on the window were floor length. There were two beds; the one closer to the door had Edward lounging. The beds were facing a large wide screen TV. It was a nice but typical hotel room.

I walked over to my bed and sat down, folding my legs underneath me. "So," I said carefully, "Do you have a plan for how to get your box back?"

Edward had his eyes closed, but I could see his face tighten. "She will not give me back my box without seeing me first, so what options do I really have?"

I had remembered Edward saying the night before that he did not want to see Loren, and I completely understood him; so I spent the car ride to Portland thinking of different ways on getting his box back.

"Well," I said, "There is another way, so you don't have to see her." Edward's eyes shot open and he looked at me, encouraging me to go on. "You have not called her and told her you were coming yet, have you?"

"No, I figured as long as I had a little bit of a surprise on her, I could use it to my advantage."

"Ok, good. So where douse she work?" I asked.

"She is the assistant manager at a department store, why douse that have anything to do with this." I could tell he was trying to figure out the puzzle.

"Do you think she will be at work today?" Today was only Tuesday, I could not think of a reason why she would not be at work.

"I would think so. Her normal hours are 9-5. Bella, what douse this have to do with anything?" He asked, frustrated with the mystery of my questions.

"Well, I was thinking that you call her right now, and tell her that you are coming tomorrow, and will meet her then. But you still have a key from the apartment don't you?" he nodded his head. "So we can go over and grab it right now. I doubt it has left your apartment."

Edward looked intently at me as he thought about what I just said. "That makes since." He said finally. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"You are stressed out, you are allowed to be the dumb one right now." I said with a joking smile.

"So will you be the dumb one when I am not stressed?" he asked, while I threw a pillow at him.

"But why should I call Loren?" he asked as he grabbed the pillow and threw it back at me.

"Because, when you call her you can build her hopes up, by saying things like how you want to get back together with her. Then when she gets back to her apartment, and finds the note that you will leave there saying "Fuck off you crazy bitch," she will realized that you swindled her."

"I'm going to leave a note?" asked Edward, "And who says 'swindle'?"

I rolled my eyes, "Really cool people do, and yes you are going to leave a note, it doesn't have to say fuck off. Hey, if you want to go back to your original plan and face her, that's cool too. I'm just offering a plan B."

"No, I like plan B, we are going to do plan B. I just did not realize how malevolent you can be. Remind me never to get on your hit list."

"You were already on my hit list; you are just lucky that you got pardoned." I laughed, though Edward did not laugh with me as reality downed on him. "Call her now, and put her on speaker phone, I want to hear." I said trying to erase the tense atmosphere that had just crept in.

That seemed to shake Edward out of his thoughts, "Why do you want to hear?"

"Because I drove three hours with you to get your box, I think I deserve to hear this conversation." I said folding my arms.

Edward sighed, but did not argue, as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell. I smiled as I jumped to his bed and sat next to him, hovering over the phone. "You can't say anything." said Edward, searching for Loren in his phone book.

"Yes, Sir." I saluted.

Edward pushed the speaker button, and I could hear the phone ring only two times before a too sweet voice answered the phone.

_"Edward, baby, I missed you. I'm so happy you called me."_

I started to pretend as if I was vomiting, Edward had to stifle a laugh.

_"Edward, honey, are you there?"_ asked Loren.

"Yeah, sweets, I'm here." Responded Edward, as he tried to look away from me, so as not to laugh.

_"Oh good_!" she was probably excited to have Edward speaking to her as if they were together again. _"I'm at work right now, let me go somewhere quieter."_ I could hear her close a door, _"Ok, I'm back."_

"Look, Loren I was thinking about coming over tomorrow. I think your right, we should talk about this face to face."

_"You just want your box back don't you?"_ I heard the venom behind her words. Oh, she was a nasty thing.

"I actually want something else." Edward said smoothly.

_"And what is that?"_ asked Loren, unsure of what else he might have forgotten.

"You." I heard her gasp as Edward continued to speak. "I've been thinking about this, and I think I over reacted. I mean, you said you loved me right?"

_"Oh yes, baby, with all my heart."_

"Good, then I'll come home to you, and we can work it out." Edward turned around and gave me the thumbs up.

_"I'll wear that baby doll that you love so much, would you like that?"_ I heard Loren say, her voice becoming dark and husky. I crinkled my nose as if I had just smelt something foul.

"Umm, sure," stalled Edward, "sounds good."

_"Edward, don't you want to know what color underwear I'm wearing right now?"_

Edward looked over at me, panic and embarrassment in his eyes. I placed my hand over my ears and started to shake my head. I so did not want to hear what kind of lingerie she had on.

"Err, I can't really do that right now," said Edward, "But tomorrow, ok?"

_"I can't wait,"_ purred Loren before she hung up the phone.

"I think I'm going to be sick," I said.

"Hey, you wanted to hear," laughed Edward.

I glared at him for a second before saying, "Well, we should go, at least we know she is at work right now."

"Sounds good,"

We were at the apartment a half an hour later. I was surprised how close we were from the hotel, but Edward told me everything in the city seemed to be close. Although I knew that Loren was at work, I could not help but feel anxious as Edward and I rode the elevator in silence. I could tell Edward current state matched mine; he continued to run his hand through his hair, and kept looking up to see how many floors we had left to travel.

"She is not here," I said for at least the eighth time. "She is at work, we just called her."

"I know," I could hear Edward's voice start to waver. "But I feel like I'm about to break into an apartment."

"It's your apartment, well, was your apartment, but it still douse not count as breaking in." I rationed, although I jumped when the elevator gave a sudden stop, proving my confidence false.

I followed Edward to the end of the hall, and stood behind him as he looked at the second to last door in the hall way.

"You kept the box under your bed, right?" I asked in a whisper.

He just nodded his head, "I thought I was never going to be here again," he said in a low, solemn voice.

"It's alright, we will make this quick," I said, placing my hand on his shoulder, "Like taking off a bad aid."

I heard Edward fiddle with the key; then unlock the door. Edward let the door swing open on its own. The apartment was much smaller then my own. The small kitchen took the corner to our left, which opened up to a very small living room, holding only a couch, coffee table, and TV.

Edward and I both let out a relieved sigh when we saw that Loren was not home.

"Hello, Loren baby is that you?" I heard a male voice call out from behind the only door in the apartment which I assumed to be the bedroom.

I felt myself stiffen, and when I looked over at Edward I had to take a few steps back, he looked completely enraged.

"So you came back for some afternoon loven?" asked the voice, "That is practically every day now for the past two weeks. You have even more energy now that Edward left." The door opened to reveal a tall, gaunt looking man who only had his boxers on. He froze at the door when he saw Edward clenching his fist, hatred seeping out of his pours. I looked more closely as the man and instantly recognized him as Edward's closest and oldest friend from high school, Tom I believed his name was. He pretty much looked the same, sandy blond hair, very generic looking features.

I had wondered how Loren could cheat on Edward. Not only did Edward look like a living Greek god, but he also such a good and interesting person; once you look past any grudges you might have been holding.

But now as I looked at Tom, I could not help but question Loren's sanity. How could she go from Edward to this?

"Edward?" said Tom, trying to regain composure. "I didn't know you were coming back, how's it going man?"

"What the fuck are you doing here?" snarled Edward.

Tom took a very cautious step back, "Hey, I… I thought you left, you know? Loren is fair game."

Was this guy asking for a death wish? Even if he had not been one of the guys who had cheated with Loren, he was sleeping her now, and that was still really low.

"But you look good," Tom continued to say, "It looks like you are doing really good for yourself." Tom looked over at me, staring at me from head to foot. Ew, I feel sullied with him just looking at me. "I mean Loren is hot and everything," said Tom, who kept his eyes on me, a disgusting smirk on his face. From the corner of my eye, I could see Edward look at me, he was probably like me, trying to figure out what Tom was talk about. "But it looks like you got yourself and nice, tight, hot peace of ass right there."

That is when Edward lost it. He leapt across the tiny apartment, and tackled Tom. I backed into the door frame as I watched Edward through Tom to the ground. It was obvious who was going to win this fight, but I could not help but flinch each time I saw Tom's fist meet Edward's face.

They continued to wrestle on the floor for a while; knocking over what little furniture that was in the apartment. I let out a scream as Tom grabbed a lamp, and smashed it on Edward's head. Thank God who ever bought that lamp had decided to get cheap porcilen.

I didn't know what to do as I stood frozen at the door. It was not until I heard a neighbor screaming to their husband to call the police that my mind jump started.

"Hurry up Edward, we have to go!" I yelled as I made my way in the bedroom. I did not have time to see the pictures of Edward and Loren on the wall, or to notice a pile of what I could only assume to be Edward's belongings in the corner of the room. I dropped to the floor and looked under the bed, finding a simple black box. I stretched to grab the box when I noticed a black note book that was out of reach. I could see part of a paper falling out, it looked like a music composition. I do not now why, but I had the sudden need to take the binder with me. I pushed the bed out of the way so that I could grab this mystery binder. I quickly opened the box I make sure it still held the very purpose for this trip. I took a relieved breath as I saw a blue baby blanket, some scattered pictures, and something which sparkled at the bottom. I shoved the binder in the box and ran back out to the living room.

They had trashed every peace of furniture in this apartment, including the TV. I saw Edward holding a very beaten looking Tom with one hand. He looked over at me, and dropped Tom as if he were nothing more then a rag doll.

"We've got to go," I said to Edward, as I still examined the apartment. "the cops are on there way, you don't think Tom is going to report you?"

"No he wont," said Edward breathlessly, he turned back to face Tom. "You will not report me Tom, because this apartment is still under my name, and technically, you are the one who is breaking and entering."

Tom sat up, and said a barely auditable "Fuck you." Edward grabbed the box from me, place one hand on the small of my back, and headed out the door. Once we were in the elevator, I was surprised to find myself panting. I looked up at Edward and gasped. He had a cut over his right eye brow with blood flowing freely, luckily not tangling with his hair, which stuck up in every direction. His light blue button up shirt was missing a few buttons, and was torn at up by his shoulder.

"Do I look that bad?" asked Edward as he let out a chuckle.

"Worse," I said quietly, "Edward, are you alright? Should we stop by the hospital? That cut, looks really nasty."

Edward shook his head, as he stared intently at me, "I am so sorry Bella,"

"What? Why?" I could not see why Edward was apologizing to me, especially since I am the one who insisted we come here. "I should be apologizing!"

"What do you have to apologize for?" asked Edward as the door opened and we hurried our way to the street.

"It was my idea to come here. It's my fault that you got into a fight." I felt my eyes water up as I looked him over again. Why had I thought up such a stupid idea to come here? Why didn't I think about the possibility of someone being there?

"Don't," said Edward cutting me off, "None of that was your fault. I should have never brought you; I always knew that if I saw anyone of my 'friends' then I would most likely end up fighting them. I never should have risked you being there. I was selfish for brining you with me."

I shook my head, "That is ridiculous, I would have followed you anyway." I noticed that we had stopped, "Where are we?" I asked. We were stood in front of a little whole in the wall shop. I looked up and saw the name of the store. "Voodoo Doughnuts?"

Edward laughed his musical laugh, "Yeah, it's a place I would come to whenever I was stressed out, I didn't even realize I we were walking here."

I walked inside the little shop which walls were painted a faded black; I doubt any more then five people could manage to fit in here. The girl behind the counter had bright red hair, and a hoop ring piercing on her nose. "Whoa dude, what happened to you?" asked the girl.

"Do you have a first aid kit?" I asked as I looked at Edward's cut, it looked like it had stopped bleeding.

"Yeah, no hold on." The girl disappeared to the back of the store.

"Take a look at the menu," encouraged Edward, a knowing smile on his face.

I looked at the menu and laughed. Some of the names were very crude, like the ball-sack doughnut, while other names made me feel a little queasy, like the blood doughnut. However I did find that some of their doughnuts were shear genius. There was the cereal section, which were doughnuts with popular cereals as toppings. After quickly cleaning Edward up, we both purchased a doughnut; Edward got the captain's crunch doughnut, while I had the Oreo doughnut.

Once we were outside we decided to head back to the hotel. I just finished my doughnut when I remembered the binder that I had found.

"Oh, Edward, I wanted to show you something," I said as we walked across the street.

"And what is that?" asked Edward, lost in his own world as he took his last bight from his doughnut.

I grabbed the box away from him; he had kept his hold on it ever since he took it away from me back at the apartment. I opened the lid and pulled out the binder and handed it to him. "I still don't know why I took it, but I just had a feeling that I should. Do you know what it is?" I saw Edward stop in his tracks, his mouth opened as he opened the binder and ran his hands over the sheet of music.

"I thought I lost this," he quietly. "Where was it?"

"It was underneath the bed," I explained, "But it could have been kicked there, I saw a pile of… stuff, just thrown to the corner, I think it was all yours."

Edward continued to look at the paper in disbelief. I waited for him to address what I had just said about his other possible belongings being thrown in a pile.

"Edward, what is that?" I asked, taking a step closer.

"I…err," Edward tucked the binder under his arm. He looked away, and he actually started to blush. "We should keep walking."

I had to jog to keep up with Edward's long strides. "Edward, don't avoid me. What is in that binder?"

Edward started to run his hand through his hair; he was nervous. "I never told you, well I never really told anyone," I was very entertain to see the pink rise in he cheeks. I could comfort him and tell him it was nothing to be embarrassed of; but seeing a flustered Edward was just too much fun. "I… I play piano."

"That's it?" I asked, why was he embarrassed of playing the piano?

Edward looked at me, studying my reaction. "But I've been playing the piano ever since I was five. Aren't you going to tell me that it's not a manly thing to do, or something?"

"I think it's kind of cool," I said slowly. Edward brought his face closer as if he was trying to find something. "Stop staring at me like that! Now what douse that have to do with the binder?"

"I have written my own compositions, all of which are in this binder. I thought I had lost it," Edward sounded almost angry with my reaction.

"Oh, that's cool!" I grabbed the binder away from him and started to look through the papers.

"You know how to read it?" asked Edward.

"No, but it's that fact that you put it together that is impressive," I shut the binder and handed it back to him. "Play for me sometime, ok?"

Edward nodded his head, and we continued to walk in calm silence. It was not until we were riding the elevator up to our room that he spoke softly. "I know that I'm not in love with Loren, and that she is a horrible person, and that it's good that I'm away from her now; but I still hurt."

"It makes perfect scene, you have been with her ever since high school." I felt awful for Edward, "She was your only girlfriend right?" Edward nodded. "Then you don't know how to deal with break ups. That is where I can help you."

"What do you mean?" asked Edward as he stepped out of the elevator and walked to our room.

"I have been and helped my friends through break ups, however that is how girls deal, I don't know how guys do it." I wondered for the first time how guys deal with breakups, I highly doubt it looked anything like what girls do. I looked over at Edward who was already sitting on his bed. "We could go to a strip club if that will make you feel better."

Edward let out a little laugh, "No, that is ok. We can do what girls do when they try to get over a break up. What is it exactly that girls do?"

"We wallow."

Edward and I were both sitting on his bed, leaning against the head rest. I had insisted that we change into our pajamas, to help set the mood of the wallowing. I had a pint of cookie dough ice cream in my lap, while Edward ate mint chocolate chip ice cream. We were watching Bridget Jones' Diary, and were at the part where Mark Darcy and Daniel Cleaver were fighting in the street, and Bridget just stood on the sidelines watching.

"That is what I felt like today," I said as I stabbed my spoon in my ice cream. "when you were fighting with Tom.

"I hope we didn't look like that when we were fighting," laughed Edward as the two men were trying to kick each other. "But I understand what that Mark guy is feeling, getting a chance to beat the crap out of the guy who you called a friend."

I nodded my head, "You did a much better job at beating Tom though."

"So if I'm Tom is Daniel, I'm Mark, then that makes you Bridget?" laughed Edward.

"Yes, only minus the sleeping with the two of you part." I nodded.

"So, friends then?" asked Edward, I could feel him looking at me.

I turned up to see those bright green eyes begging for a second chance. "Friends," I smiled.

"Good, I thought I was never going to be able to trust anyone to be my friend again," said Edward soberly.

"Well, I can promise you one thing Edward," I gave him a playful smile, "I'll never sleep any of your future girlfriends."

Edward didn't not laugh as I thought he would, only he game me a forced smile. "Too soon?" I asked. "Sorry,"

"It's alright," Edward shook his head, "A part of me will always be afraid the history might repeat its self, with any future girlfriend, or with any _male_ friends."

"Well, so far I'm your friend, and you don't have to worry about me." I winked at him, "Jasper is your friend, and once you see him and Alice together you will never have to worry. Oh, and you still have to meet Emmett and Rosalie. Trust me, when you see Rose, you will see why Emmett would never stray. I mean besides the fact that they are totally in love and it is not in Emmett's nature to cheat; she is drop dead gorgeous, and feisty. You will like them."

"So I get to hang around totally right and perfect for each other couples?" Edward rolled his eyes, "Great."

"Hey, I have had to deal with them for years," I said, "plus you've still got me. You'll be the cool bachelor, and I will be the rich spinster with hot pool boys."

Edward laughed again, and it wormed my heart knowing that I was the one to make him do so.

"That sounds like a plan," said Edward as he trashed both of our eaten ice creams. "So what time do we leave?"

I climbed into my bed and turned off the TV, "I say we sleep in, and leave whenever. I've got this place paid for another night so we are good to leave whenever we want tomorrow."

Edward yond and stretched his arms, "So when we get back to Seattle I get to meet the rest of the group?"

"Yep, so you better get a goodnights rest if you want to keep up with us." I laughed.

"Hey, Bella?" Edward said quietly.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"No, problem. It is what friends are for, as cheesey as that sounds." And with that, I turned off the light.

* * *

Yeah, so a lot goes on here. I know the Voodoo doughnut thing is a little off, but I had to put it in there. I was visiting family in Portland this summer, and my cousin took me to Voodoo, and it was seriously the coolest place I ever been, well second to Powel's book store, which it basically the biggest book store I have ever been to, I was in heaven! I wanted to add Powel's in there, but it would not make since to go to a doughnut shop AND book store after just being in a fight.

And yes I had to through in some of my music in there. The Fratellis are awesome, as are Franz Ferdinand. And I do have that Jonas Brother's song on my I pod, it is a fun song! Just like the 7 things, song my Miley. Hahaha

The next chapter is called "Everyone, this is Edward."

I'm actually really excited about the next chapter because this is where the plot to the story comes out, well sort of, it's on its way or revealing it's self.


	6. Everyone, this is Edward

So you guys are all, the best readers! Seriously, I am giggling like a school girl here. Hehehe

I've got some news, I got a Beta!! yay. Gemmabobella. She is a really good writer, and i am diggen her story Lost and Found. go check it out.

Some of the reviews I get are making me laugh, like the one from jenncrazzy909 (I kinda added it in here, hope you don't mind). But then I wrote this chapter and I got some even more great reviews, so I couldn't incorporate some of them, and the shout out list I have is really long, so I am just going to have to say, _to all those who have reviewed, added me to their favorites, or just read this,_ _you are all the kick ass fuel to my fire!!_

**I got a lot of questions on Bella and Edward and how they feel about each other**. Well if you are all slightly confused then I am doing my job, because that is what Bella is, slightly confused. But one thing is for sure, Bella sees Edward as her friend, first and for most. As for Edward, you are all just going to have to wait.

enjoy :)

* * *

Chapter 6 Everyone, this is Edward

I woke up to the smell of coffee and eggs, and never in my life had I smelt anything so good. However, I did not want to open my eyes; I just wanted to stay in bed a little bit longer. I could hear the sound of whip cream being poured out of the can, mixed with the smell of syrup. Open my eyes and eat, or stay in this worm comfy bed and sleep a little more?

The sound of moving plates did not disturb me, yet it did disturb the air flow, and drifted the smell of bacon over to me. Ok, I'm getting up.

I kicked off the sheets with a groan and pulled myself up while keeping my eyes shut. Could I be able to eat with my eyes closed? I took a deep breath, and my stomach gave a painful groan as I smelt the aroma of breakfast. Nope, open eyes it is.

I saw Edward standing over the small table in the room, which he apparently dragged over to the space between our beds with plates of food he must have bought from down stairs. He was fully dressed in a forest green button up shirt, and a pair of dark blue jeans. His hair was a mess, but was still relatively tamed. He looked over at me and gave me a crooked smile, which made my heart skip a beat. Ugg, it was too early in the morning to be staring at a beautiful man. I looked over at the alarm clock, informing me that it was 7 am.

"Are you kidding me?" I rubbed the sleep away from my eyes.

"It's 7 in the morning, and you are already up, dressed, and you got breakfast? I thought guys were supposed to sleep in till 12." I reached over for the plate closest in my direction, and took two strips of beacon, and began gnawing on it. "Thank you," I grumbled.

"I'm a morning person," shrugged Edward. "And I went to the gym here and worked out too."

"Show off," I muttered as I took a gulp of coffee.

"Did you know you talk in your sleep?" asked Edward as he filled a smaller plate with some eggs.

My eyes shot open, "I've been told," I said carefully, trying to read his expression. He looked amused about something. "What did I say?"

"You talked about different ways of killing Lauren," Edward said coolly,

"I heard something about being pushed off a three hundred story building, and being eaten by sharks, however that was only after the raging elephant."

I could feel my face glow from embarrassment. "Well, she is a bitch." I said biting into a syrup-drenched pancake. "So we are leaving once I'm ready?"

"Yeah, there is not really anything I would want to do here," Edward leaned across the table with his fork and swiped some of the whip cream off my pancake and ate it.

"There is a can right there you know," I gave Edward a dirty look and shook the whip cream can to replenish my supply.

"Yeah, but it tastes so much better off of your plate," he grinned.

"You reach over here again, and I'll stab you with my fork," I promised as I took a big bight from my whip cream pancake.

The next couple of days consisted of Edward and I just hanging out. We would talk about everything, and nothing. And although we never really did anything, the time just flew by. I think what really surprised me was that I was not tired of Edward. As an only child, and after living with my dad Charlie who was hardly ever home, I had grown accustomed to time to myself. Even while I lived with Alice, I would go to my room just to be alone with my thoughts. However, I never felt that need with Edward. I was completely content with spending almost all my time with him.

It was Friday afternoon, I was outlining a story on my lab top, and Edward was reading a book. We both sat on the couch in the living room, while classical music played in the background.

I set my lab top aside, and asked the question that I wanted to ask for quite some time. "Edward, are you tired of me yet?"

Edward marked the place in the book, and looked up at me with a confused expression. "No, why do you ask?"

"We've been hanging out everyday for the last couple of days. The only time when we are not together is when we go to bed. So I'm just asking if you are tired of me. I don't want you to feel like you owe me and that you have to spend all your time with me." I felt like I needed to say this, what if he was miserable?

Edward started to laugh, "No, I am not spending time with you just because

I feel like I owe you. Are you tired of hanging out with me?"

"No," I said as I brought my brows together in thought, "and I'm a little surprised that I'm not sick of you yet."

"And I am not sick of your either Bella," smiled Edward.

I was about to respond to him when my cell phone went off, signaling me that I had a text message.

**To Bella FW: Alice, Jasper, Rose**

**From Emmett:**

**Tomorrow is my day. Meet me in my parking garage at 2. Wear all black. ALL**

**BLACK!**

I had to reread the message before I shut my phone. "Looks like you get to meet the rest of the group; we are all going out tomorrow."

"But Jasper is getting in tonight," said Edward "Don't you think he would want one day to relax?"

I nodded, "Yeah, but Emmett declared that tomorrow is his day, so we have to go along."

"What do you mean declared?"

"Oh, right, you don't know." I was going to have to remember to keep filling him in on the little details. "So we all get one day each month to do whatever we want and the rest of us have to go along with it." I shrugged, "It helps us come up with different things to do, and share our passions with our friends. And Emmett wants tomorrow to be his day."

"What does Emmett like to do on his days?" I could see the slight worry in his eyes. I already told him some interesting stories about Emmett.

"Fun kid stuff," I smile reminiscently, "Like going to an arcade, or to any local fairs. But I am not sure about tomorrow; he said that we have to wear all black."

I thought about where we might go that required us to dress in all black - rob a bank maybe?

"What about his girlfriend, Rosalie, what does she like to do?" I could see Edward making little mental notes in his head.

"With Rose, it usually involves cars." I said simply.

Edward raised one eyebrow, "I thought you said she was a blond model type."

I dramatically looked around the room, as if to check to see that there was not anyone listening to our conversation. "You better not let her hear you say that," I warned, "No, she is a big car fanatic. She probably would have become a mechanic or something if she wasn't so interested in being an agent. Never, never categorize her as a stereotypical blond, 'cuz she would kick your ass."

Edward laughed, "Will do. How about Alice, any surprises there?"

I shook my head, "No, on her days she will usually take us to a fashion show or something. But I would definitely say don't let her size fool you, she can be a scary little thing." I shuddered as I thought back to all the times Alice forced me to buy outfits that I had deemed not appropriate, she won each time.

"Let me guess," said Edward, "Jasper uses his day by going to a museum."

I nodded, "Yeah, that or going to the beach; even if it is only 50 degrees out."

"How about you, how do you spend your day?" he asked softly.

I smiled to myself, "I feel like we, as in human kind, always feel the need to go out, and do something to spend time with one another. So on my days, I just like to have them all come over, and play board games or something."

Edward looked at me with a kind smile that reached his brilliant green eyes.

"That sounds nice."

It was Saturday afternoon when I was sitting on Edward's bed, looking through his iPod as he got dressed in his closet. I had on a pair of black sporty pants, a black undershirt, with a black sporty zip up hoodie. I went out the night before to purchase black sneakers, and even found black socks. My hair was up in a ponytail, and I threw on an all-black baseball cap. Alice would not be pleased, but she would deal.

"Will you hurry up!" I yelled, "Honestly, you are worse then Alice, it's just clothes. Pick something and let's get out of here. We are going to be late!"

"I just want to make a nice impression," Edward stepped out of his closet right as he was putting on his shirt, covering his perfect body. He had on his black jeans, with a black long sleeve knitted top. "All your friends have been hearing about me is that I am some pathetic slob; I just want to make a good first impression."

"They know you were in zombie mode," I said as I got up and headed to the front door, Edward right behind me. Once I reached the door I turned around to face Edward. I reached my hand up and pinched his cheek. I spoke to him as if I were speaking to a two year old. "Aww, don't you worry Eddie, they are going to love you!" Edward pushed my hand away, and glared at me, but quickly erupted in laughter.

We were the last ones to arrive at the parking garage. I elbowed Edward and whispered an "I told you so." Jasper and Alice were parked to the left of Emmett's monster Jeep. Jasper's little hybrid looked like a baby in comparison. I parked my car to the right of the Jeep; I had convinced Edward to let me drive today. Jasper was leaning against his car with Alice wrapped in his arms. From what I could tell, Jasper also wore all black. Alice wore an off the shoulder long sleeve black top, and a very tight pair of black skinny jeans. Rose stood there in all her glory. She was able to make a cool matching pair of all black sweats look worthy of being on the runway. It was hard to miss Emmett, although he seemed as tall as Jasper, his physique made it look like as if he towered over everyone. If any stranger were to see him, they would be too entranced with his muscles to notice his face which always seemed to have a smile, showing off his dimples, and made his light blue eyes shine.

I could see Edward stiffen next to me as he looked at Emmett. "Is he supposed to be like a teddy bear?" question Edward. I told him how I felt like Emmett was my own personal teddy bear.

"Edward look at him," I glanced over to Emmett and smiled, "he looks like a little boy on Christmas morning. He is excited to have a new friend."

"As long as he does not try to kill me, I will be fine."

We got out of the car, and I made my way over to hug everyone hello. Edward walked over and gave Jasper a one armed hug. I heard Jasper whisper,

"Welcome back man,"

I smiled as I saw the two friends reunite. I looked at Edward directly, "Edward, you remember Alice?"

Edward held out his hand, "It is nice to see you again."

Alice pushed his hand away and gave him a hug, "It is good to see you too!" I had to laugh to myself, as Edward awkwardly hugged Alice back, unsure of what to do.

"And, this is Rosalie," I pointed to Rose.

She grabbed Edward's hand and gave him a dazzling smile which matched his own. "It is nice to finally meet the person who stole Bella away from me these last couple of days."

"Hey," I complained, "You said that I could go."

"Yes," said Rose, stepping closer to me, "But while you were gone, I had a great idea on how to get your name out there even more so."

"Aw Rosie, no work talk please." Emmett had a wide smile on his face as he walked over to Edward and held his hand out to him. "I'm Emmett, and you don't look like the mess that Bella described."

"Emmett!" Rose and I both yelled at the same time.

"What?" Emmett looked at us, truly confused. "I was giving him a compliment."

Edward started to laugh, lifting the slightly tense atmosphere. "I accept your compliment."

I sighed as I turned to Emmett, "Now would you care to explain why all are dressed this way?"

Emmett's smile grew even wider, "We are playing laser tag!"

We decided to take two cars; well really Alice decided that we were going to take two cars. The boys climbed into Emmett's Jeep, while Rose and Alice sat in my Explorer.

"Ok, now spill." The door had barley even closed, and Alice was demanding me to fill her in on the Portland trip.

They ooed and awed in the right places as I told them about the conversation we had after Alice left me alone with Edward. I saw the heartbreaking expressions on their faces when I explained about Edward, his parents, and the box. Alice cursed Lauren when I described what she had planned to do with the box if Edward had not gone back. Both of them yelled out in anger when I told them about Tom being in the apartment. Rose smiled and commended Edward on the fight. And they laughed as I told them that I helped Edward wallow.

The girls and I were standing in the lobby for laser tag. There was a teenage boy with short spiked black hair; he stared in awe at Alice and Rose as they leaned casually against the wall. I was reading the instructions on the wall on how to work the laser gun, when I heard laughter. I turned around to see the guys walking in; Edward walked between the other two. Emmett playfully punched Edward on the arm and continued saying, "Edward, you are the man, I would not want to get in a fight with you!"

"Looks like they bonded," I whispered to Rose and Alice. I was very happy to see Edward fit right in with us.

The boys walked up to us, Emmett grabbing Rose and kissing her, Jasper gently leaned down and whispered something to Alice which made her eyes go glossy; Edward just looked at me, looked at our friends, and rolled his eyes while I laughed.

"Ladies, and Gentlemen," started Emmett, looking at all of us. "Today, we play laser tag, but we do it Emmett style."

"What is Emmett style?" asked Edward as he saw the rest of us, with looks of worry and excitement.

"It is very similar to Alice style," explained Rosalie, "It's over the top."

"Hey!" complained Alice, while Emmett dove into an explanation.

"I heard about this place on the internet. You need six people in order to participate," Emmett looked over at Edward with a huge smile, "and now that we have six people I singed us up as soon as possible. We play for one hour, against whatever team singed up for this hour."

Right as Emmett explained this, a group of college looking guys walked in. They all wore matching Seattle University sweatshirts, which were black with red and white letting. I guess they were as serious as Emmett was. There were two blonds, one with longer hair, one spiked hair. Both of them gave Rose, Alice and I a disgusting smile and wink combination.

There were three more guys with jet-black hair, which I could tell was died. The taller one of the three had shoulder length hair, but was pulled back into a tight ponytail. The other one had a feau-hawk. The third one had stringing hair, which I questioned if it had ever been washed. Neither one of them looked in our eyes, although they did stare openly at our bodies.

The last one of the group had light brown hair, he was clean cut and as he walked by, he acknowledged all of us with a polite smile and nod.

I saw as Emmett and Jasper both placed a protective hand around Rose and Alice. It didn't matter what age, but Emmett and Jasper would always get protective whenever someone checked out their 'women'.

I turned to Edward, and said in a high pitch slightly southern accent, "Oh, please Edward, save me from those hormonal college boys."

Edward snickered as Emmett had us all huddle closer. "Ha! My plan worked. Did you see what they were wearing?" he didn't wait for a response. "They are wearing white." When none of us looked impressed he went on. "This laser tag arena has neon lights everywhere, so whatever color you wear, it is going to shine and give away your position; hence why we are all wearing black."

I laughed as Emmett smiled with pride over his idea. He went on to continue, "Now I remember talking to Jasper a while back about WW2 and he said something about thunder, lighting."

"In World War 2," explained Jasper, "When soldiers would be making their way to their destination on foot, they could not always tell who was the enemy and who was their comrade. So they would hide behind something and say "thunder" and if it was their comrade, they would respond with a "flash". And if no one said anything, they would attack."

"And that is what we are going to be doing here today!" Emmett began to explain to us hand signals and what they meant.

Edward leaned into my ear, and whispered, "Is he really serious about this?"

I smiled when I saw uncertainty in his green eyes, "As serious as he is about his X box. So you better pay attention."

The game was, in one word, intense. Jasper and Emmett both felt the need to crush the other team for looking at their girls. Rosalie and Alice were both set up at our home station, guarding this little box plated up on the ceiling which could only be shot at if you were directly underneath, this is were the big points were scored. Jasper and Emmett were both on the defense, or as Emmett had put it "were live on the battle field." Edward and I were both on the offence, and it was our job to sneak into their home base and shoot their box on the ceiling.

Emmett had been right; wearing all black had helped us immensely. It was easy to spot the other team, seeing as they had bright glowing writing on their backs. Edward and I had kept to the shadows, and waited for a perfect opportunity to strike. I did get shot a few times and had to go back to my home base to recharge. On the way back, I saw Emmett arm crawl from one hiding space, to another.

I did not really think Edward and I had a method of getting points, until half way through the game. Edward would signal me to go and try to sneak into their home station to shoot their ceiling box. Though I would not be there very long before I spotted and had to run off; many times I would run into someone from the other team, tip over my feet, and bring whoever my victim was to the ground with me. Why had I volunteered to be on offence?

Edward would wait until the other team would leave to see what had happened, then attack and leave before they returned. However half way through the game, both the other team and I had realized what was going on; the only difference was that the other team thought I was faking my clumsiness and therefore had little mercy for me afterwards.

The other team never really had chance to begin with, and when they had eyed Rose and Alice, they just singed their death wish. When we walked out to see our scores Emmett began to bear hug every one of us. I felt almost a little bad for Edward, but he responded with equal enthusiasm as the guys started to cheer and gloat, while the college boys just walked away with their tails in between their legs.

We were all hungry thanks to our 'epic battle', as Emmett kept putting it, and we all decided that pizza would be a good reward. After devouring three very large pizzas, we were all sitting around our table talking.

"So Edward, what do you do?" asked Emmett as he patted his stomach after eating his last slice.

"I was an accountant back in Portland," said Edward as he shook his head, "But I hated it. I'm taking this opportunity to see what I really want to do with my life."

"Have you come up with anything?" asked Jasper. I could tell Jasper was the most thrilled with Edward's improvement.

"No," Edward said sadly "There is nothing I have a passion for."

"That is not true." I blurted out. "You play the piano," I looked at the group, "He writes his own compositions too."

"I completely forgot that you played!" Jasper started to look really excited, "Why didn't you remind me. You can do that."

Edward looked flustered and a little annoyed with me, "I can't make a decent living off of that. I want to have a job that I love, but I also need it to pay the bills."

"You don't have any bills Edward," I reminded him.

"True, but I can't keep living off of you." Edward let out a sigh, "Look, if there was any way that I could play the piano as a living, I would do it, but that is just not the reality here."

"Actually," said Emmett, he face changed from looking like an excited child, to a businessman who was about to take on thrilling venture. "My father and I have been talking about expanding Cullen Agency. Right now we have the writing department," He looked over at both Rose and I and gave us a smile. "The acting department, singing, department, and the modeling department. But my father and I have wanted to branch out even further and do a musical department. There are a lot of people out there that need a good piano composition."

"But how do you know that I am any good?" asked Edward, he looked like he was in shock.

Emmett leaned across the table, in full business mode. "Let me offer you this; come by the office on Monday and you can play a piece for my father and I, and if we like it, we will sign you."

Edward sat there, his mouth open, completely in shock. "I… I don't know what to say. Thank you."

"Don't say thank you just yet," laughed Emmett, "You still need to play for us."

"I thought you said no work talk!" complained Rose as she crossed her arms and glared at Emmett.

"Rose, hun, I am just giving Edward an interview. It does not count as work talk until he gets hired."

"Oh bull. If you get to talk work, so do I." Rose turned to face me. "Bella, I had the greatest idea on how to get your name even more out there. Right now you are too boring!"

"Aw, thanks Rose." I said sarcastically, "That doesn't hurt one bit."

Rose waved her hand to dismiss my comment. "No what I mean is that your press is boring. You need to get in the gossip magazines."

"What you want me to get a DUI or something?" I asked. "Look, I am not showing my Britney to the world."

I heard Alice laugh while Edward asked what I meant by my Britney. "You know when Britney Spears got out of her car, and she was not wearing any underwear, and we could all see her Britney," explained Alice "Well Bella has been calling it that ever since."

"I think it has a nice ring to it," I defended.

"No, I do not want you showing off your goods." Said Rose over Emmett and Jasper's laughter. "But I want you to date some up and coming stars. Like some new cute guy from a TV show, or the new hot quarterback. And once the gossip magz hear about you dating all these hot up and comings, they are going to talk about you more and more!"

"Rose, I don't want to be seen as some dating whore." I felt a little uncomfortable with the thought that people would think that I was sleeping around with all these guys.

"You see that is where I step in, and say that you and whoever the guy is, are just friends, and you were going out on a friendly dinner." Rose's face was lit with excitement. "Just enough to get the people talking."

"But how do I get some guy to date me, but know that it is not a real date?" I didn't mind this idea that much, as long as the other party was fully aware that I did not want anything to go any further then that dinner.

"Bella," laughed Rose, "Do you think I am the only one who came up with this idea?" She just laughed at my confused expression. "There is a whole list of guys whose agents are doing the same thing to them. Just come to my office on Monday and we will talk about it even more then."

"This is perfect Bella!" squealed Alice, "We have to go shopping for date clothes now!"

"Great," I mumbled. I looked at Edward who sat at my side, "Looks like we are both going into the office on Monday."

* * *

Now before you knock down the laser tag, and the dramatic lengths that Emmett goes to, I just want to say this little story. This summer (in Portland) I went to play laser tag (not as intense as this one) with my cousins. And all six of us were all in the corner going over the whole thunder flash thing. And the army-crawl, my cousin did that while we were playing, and I just had to add it in.

**I know the last couple of chapters have been all deep and stuff,** but that is because they dealt with Edward and his drama. This chapter was about the group, and as a group, they are pretty fun.

I did hint to the plot, did anyone see it? It was towards the end. Any guesses to where this is going? I would love to hear your theories!

Next chapter is called "The Hunt" some more Bella and Edward time, and i will clarify a few things. All will be revealed in time

Oh, some one asked me about there age, and I will try clarify it in the next chapter.

You are all great, and I hope you enjoyed. :)


	7. The Hunt

Hey everyone, so I have a few things I need to get to today:

- You all are so amazing, really. You rock. (reference to later)

-Sorry it took me a little while to post, but I had family stuff, and my beta, the awesome gemmabobella, also has a life, so post will probably take an extra day.

- ok, from day **1** I have said that my spelling sucks. E-mailing me, and telling me that my spelling suck is not going to magically make it better. I do continue to review my work, and I really do try. But my Beta just kicked in last chapter, so yeah. But if there are misspelled words, I'm sorry but please just try to look past my imperfection, and just enjoy the story.

Sorry for my little rant, but it had to be done.

I do not own Twilight.

Enjoy :)

* * *

Chapter 7- The Hunt

Edward and I were both nervous on Monday morning, only for different reasons. I had not been on a date in months, and now I was just going to be thrust into blind dating. I really couldn't complain though. Edward was the one who really had a reason to worry. He told me that he's never played his compositions for anyone before, so he did not know if he was any good. Although I was slightly relieved to be able to see this insecure part of Edward, I really did feel bad for the guy.

I told him that he should practice in front of me, but he reminded me that we did not have a piano to practice with. He also insisted that a keyboard, which I offered to buy him, was just not the same as a piano. That was something I could easily understand, as I can write better on a lab top then by hand.

All through Sunday I noticed Edward looking over his compositions anxiously. I would hear him say things like, "No, this is definitely not good enough," or "How am I suppose to play this in front of them?" As Edward would look through the countless papers scattered on the living room floor, I could see his fingers move as if he were playing the piano.

"Stop it," I hissed. "You're making me nervous too." Edward and I were on our way to our meetings; Edward to Emmett's office, and I was headed to Rose's office.

He continued to run his hand through his hair, and I could feel the nerves coming off of him, and it was definitely not helping me calm my own nerves.

"You're messing up your hair," I looked over at Edward. Even if he did muddle his hair completely, he still looked like he stepped out of a GQ magazine. Not fair. Emmett told him to dress casual, but still nice, which is exactly how Edward appeared. He had on a crisp pair of dark blue jeans. He wore a snug, nice black top on, a black hoodie over it and a nice black button up jacket over the hoodie, with the hood sticking out.

"Sorry, I just…" Edward let out an exasperated breath as the door to the elevator opened. He looked down at me and I saw insecurity written on his face; that was something new to see.

"Edward you are going to be fine, you are going to be perfect," I cheered, "Come on, there really isn't anything you can't do."

"But what if this is the one thing I can't do?" he panicked, "What if I am good at everything else, and the universe is balancing it out by having me suck at this."

I thought about what he said for a moment and was surprised to realize that he kind of did have a point. "You could just say that your last relationship sucked so bad, that it already balances everything out."

I could see him working out my reasoning, "That could work…"

"It does work," I nodded slowly. "Now, Emmett's office is right down there," I pointed to the end of the long hallway. "You boys are probably going to come over to Rose's office once you're done." I felt like I was sending Edward off to his first day of school. "So, good luck, you are going to do great!"

I walked in the direction of Rose's office. Rose had been offered the much larger corner office, but she had rejected it. She felt the need to prove to her colleges that when she moved into the corner office, she would deserve it.

After saying hi to Jen, Rose's receptionist, I walked up and knocked on the double doors leading to her office. I heard her laughing as she welcomed me in. The basic layout to the room was the same; the desk was in the center of the room, with matching guest chairs. There was a filing cabinet off to the side, only this one was filled with papers dealing with all of Rose's clients. And to my left was a plant, looking much more alive then the last time I saw it.

Rose sat on her desk, with her arms crossed, laughing. She wore a long all black pencil skirt with an empire waist, with a long sleeve white blouse tucked into her skirt and high heals that could kill a man, or at least it would kill me if I wore them.

Alice was sitting in one of the guest chairs, also laughing. She had on a tight white sleeveless dress, with a pair of bright yellow pumps. Both of their faces brightened even more, as I walked in.

"Aw, Bella you are finally here," Rose ushered me in to the empty seat.

"Sorry, I was giving Edward a pep talk," I smoothed my dress as I sat down. Today I wore a dark blue dress with thick straps, and a high neck line. "So I'm going to be dating slightly famous guys?"

"Yes, I was just talking to Alice, and we've decided that we can turn this whole public dating thing, into an opportunity to turn you into a fashionista!"

"Fahionista?" I questioned. I really did not like the way Alice was looking at me, it made me feel like a peace of meat.

"Not only will you be a beautiful writer, with beautiful writing, but you will be a cool fashion-forward writer too!" Rose was standing now. "We are going to be killing two birds with one stone."

"Or reviving two birds with one breath," interrupted Alice, "No need to kill rhetorical animals."

Rose rolled her eyes, "So, as I go through, looking at possible guys for you to date, I was wondering," she looked at me, "you don't have any specific preferences, do you?"

I was too caught up with the thought of being a "fashionista," to really follow what Rose was saying. I was to busy griping over that fact that this now meant that I have to go shopping even more. "I don't care, as long as they are nice."

"Fantastic, that makes my job easier." Rose walked around to her chair, "I'll let you know who your first date is and when."

"Sounds good." I offered, still lost in my thoughts.

We continued the conversation on a little while longer. We found out that Alice's little sister was getting closer to her due date. Alice still didn't know the sex of the baby, but she was hopping to have a little niece that she could go shopping with. We asked Alice if she was doing all right with having her little sister being married and having a family before she was.

"Part of me is a little pissed," Alice admitted with a shrug. "I mean she is only 25 and she already has the picture perfect little life. But that's just it, she has a little life. Jasper and I are only 28 and I feel like we are still young. I already found the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, and I have a successful career. Jasper and I can choose when we want to start that other part of our life, instead of having to rush wedding plans so that I'm not showing when I get married." Alice laughed a wickedly, as I'm sure she thought about the scene her sister made when her dream wedding dress did not look the way she planed as her baby bump started to show.

"How about you and Emmett?" Alice asked Rose, turning the spot light away from her, "Are we going to be hearing any wedding bells soon?"

"You know I am in no rush, but after Emmett's birthday a few months back, he just realized that it is his last year to be in his 20's. He has it in his mind that he does not need to start settling down until he is 30. As long as I'm married before I'm 30, I'll be fine, but that gives me two years. So I should probably start talking more seriously about it with him." I had to laugh at how Rose spoke of herself getting married as if it were a business venture.

Rosalie and Alice were both silent before they turned to me, waiting for me to add to the conversation. "What?"

"Well Bella, you do plan on settling down sometime, don't you?" Alice sounded almost worried.

"When the time and man is right, then I'll settle down," I could hear my voice becoming defensive. "Look, I'm still in my mid to late 20's, so I've got time."

"Bella," Rose looked half annoyed, half amused. "You are going to turn 28 in September. I hate to break it to you, but you _are_ in your late 20's."

"No, 27 is mid to late, 28 is late 20's" I pouted, "Let me enjoy my youth. You're just upset that I'm the baby."

"How old is Edward?" asked Rose.

"He just turned 28 too."

"But Bella," Alice was quiet, showing the seriousness in her tone, "Don't you _want_ to have the whole husband, and kids thing?"

I reached out and placed my hand over Alice's. "Alice, you have to understand that I didn't grow up with the same kind of experience you did. I didn't have that model of a happily married mother and father. The only examples I've had of what a good relationship looks like are those between Rose and Emmett, you and Jasper, and Mr. and Mrs. Cullen. It's hard to want something that you have never known."

"You are so depressing Bella," Rose whispered solemnly.

I broke out in laughter, erasing the atmosphere that I set only moments ago. "Who knows, maybe this fake dating thing will be good for me. Who says I can't find Mr. Right by accident?"

"Oh, we should choose guys for Bella and see who gets the closest to her taste," suggested Alice, "We could place a bet and everything!"

"Did I hear something about a bet?" Emmett poked his head into the office. He walked in, heading straight to Rosalie to give her a kiss, followed by a very happy looking Edward and Carlisle Cullen.

Carlisle, Emmett's father, looked nothing like his son. He was just as tall as Emmett only not as bulky. He had blond hair, and bright blue eyes that matched his son's. Carlisle was indeed a very good looking man especially as he walked in with such confidence in his tailor made suite, and he hardly looked his age. I'm not going to lie here; he is indeed a DILF, a dad I'd like to fuck.

"Yeah, we are betting to see which one of us can pick the right guy for Bella through this whole fake dating thing," answered Alice.

"Oh yeah, just betting on my love life, nothing big," I stood and walked over to Edward, "So, how did it go?"

"I am now an official part of Cullen agency!" he beamed.

"That's great!" I yelled. I threw my arms around him and was surprised when he returned my hug. Did he always smell this good? I had to wonder.

"Edward is a very experienced piano player," Carlisle walked up behind Edward and placed his hand on Edward's shoulder. "And I was very impressed with his compositions, he has such passion."

Edward hadn't stopped smiling since he walked in, "And I'll write a hundred more just the same!"

Carlisle just laughed, "You have so many good selections, that I believe it will be some time before I request a new composition from you." Carlisle turned to face the rest of us, "I want to treat all of you for a celebration dinner tonight. Alice if you would please extend my invitation to Jasper?"

"I'll text him right now!" Alice whipped out her bright pink cell phone and began clicking away.

"Perfect! I'll send the limo to pick you all up tonight."

"Edward, help!" I called from my room. Edward came crashing into my bedroom, his dark blue button up shirt completely was unbuttoned, revealing his chiseled abs that were even more defined as he stood, ready to pounce on the trouble that harmed me.

"What is it?" Edward looked around the room frantically, searching for the problem. "What's wrong?"

"I need you to zip up the back of my dress." I was wearing a snug black dress with white floral print. I had my back to him, the zipper reaching just below my bra.

"You called me in for that?" I could not see Edward, but he sounded angry. "You scared me Bella."

"What? I just called you in for help," I peaked over my shoulder and wiggled my back, "Zipper please."

"You yelled, 'Edward, help' I thought someone might have broken into your room."

I let out a frustrated sigh, "That would be a different yell. Believe me, you would be able to hear the panic in my voice if it were something _that_ serious. Now, could you please help me with my zipper?"

"Well, next time I might not come in when you call," I looked over my shoulder again, and I saw him glaring at me with his arms crossed.

"I am sorry I scared you Edward," I tried really hard not to sound sarcastic. "I will only call for you when I need help, now please, zipper?"

I felt the zipper slide up my back, and when he reached the top I jumped from his grasp and slid on my black strappy high heals. When I turned around I saw Edward finish buttoning his last button. I then noticed the black slacks he had on.

"You look nice," I was breathless, strapping those damn shoes were always as task.

"I would say the same for you, but I don't believe that nice is a fitting word." He stood there, hands in his pockets, looking as smooth as his voice sounded.

I blinked in mock confusion, "Did you think revolting was a better word?"

He shook his head, "The word that I was thinking is of is on the complete other end of the spectrum." He smiled his crooked smile.

"You are such a kiss ass," I mumbled while I looked away, hopping that he didn't see my blush.

I grabbed my cell when it began to ring. The caller ID told me it was Emmett. "Hey Bella, come on down!" then he hung up.

I looked up at Edward, my blush replaced with a smile, "Ready to celebrate?"

"I call for a toast," Carlisle stood up. He was seated at the head of our table while Esme, his wife, sat at the other end. Esme was a beautiful, inside and out. Like Carlisle she did not look her age. She had long dark brown hair, just like Emmett, which was sprawled along her shoulders, and framed her face, making her hazel eyes shine. Was I the only one with brown eyes here? Tonight she had on an all black, classic looking dress that hung to her figure in a modest, yet very sexy way. I had to admit that she was indeed a MILF.

To her left sat Jasper who was leaning in to Alice from across the table, as she was seated across from him, to Esme's right. Next to Alice sat Rose, who sat snugly next to Emmett to Carlisle's left. On Carlisle's right sat Edward, who was just talking to me; I ended up smashed between Edward and Jasper.

The restaurant that Carlisle brought us to was very nice, and that was putting it mildly. The meals were served in courses while we ate as a live band played in the background. Our waiter had a French accent, and I was debating with Edward whether the accent was real or not.

We all rose our glasses as Carlisle continued he speech. "At Cullen Agency we're not interested in talent, but rather, those whose talent shines above all others. We take great pride in all whom sign with us. In addition to the necessary talent and excellence we demand of all those who join our company, we also need to feel that they are capable of representing Cullen Agency in the best of lights. Before we sign anyone one, we stress the responsibility on the roll they are about to play."

I looked over at Rose, I mouthed, "You never did that."

Rose actually looked a little uneasy as she shushed me.

Carlisle continued, "And those are just the people we sign in our developed departments. I have been discussing a musical department with Emmett for quite some time, but no one seemed to meet up to our expectations. After all of this time, I was beginning to fear that our vision would never be realized. And then Edward stumbled into our office."

Carlisle looked down at Edward and patted his shoulder. "Edward here has the burden of not only needing to represent the company, but to also help with building the foundations of this new department. I have no doubt in my mind that Edward will rise to the occasion, and turn our vision into reality."

Carlisle lifted his glass, "On that note, let us raise our glasses to Edward, and to burdens turning into gifts."

"To Edward, and to burdens turning into gifts," we all cheered as we lifted our glasses to dink.

The hours passed by and the alcohol began to flow. Carlisle and Esme excused themselves quite some time ago, leaving us the limo for the rest of the night. I noticed that the few drinks I had were helping make everything a lot funnier. I was in pain with how much I was laughing at Emmett and his interpretation of Madonna.

But like most alcohol influenced conversations, the topic quickly became deep; or as deep as we could manage.

"Edward, you are awesome," Emmett's words were slurred. He had his arm hung around Rose, who was lost in a giggling fit with Alice. "I mean, dude, your life sucked, and then you came out here and you're making it rock, like _really_ rock."

"No, no, no, no," Edward waved his hands around. "_I_ am the one who sucks."

"No," piped in Jasper, who was having a staring contest with me, "You my friend rock. I mean look," Jasper threw his hands up in the air, "just look. You have your whole piano thing that rocks."

"No, I would not be here," Edward's words were just a slurred as Emmett's. "I did not kick my butt to get here."

"Man, just give credit where credit is…" Emmett's face screwed up in concentration, "aw hell, just put the credit where it is supposed to be."

"That is what I'm trying to do!" Edward turned to face me, and placed one arm around me, "Bella is the one who rocks here."

"What did I do?" Wow, that was my voice? I guess I was a little bit more drunk then I thought. Ok, try not to garble your words.

"You helped me Bella," Edward rested his forehead on mine, his glassy eyes meeting mine. "You were there when you didn't have to be, when you shouldn't have been."

"I wanted to be there," I sighed as I rested my head in the crook of his neck. How did I not notice how good he smelt?

"Bella!" Alice's chipper voice called, interrupting my daze. "Bathroom time."

I groaned as I pulled myself away. I knew that bathroom time is code for 'girl talk'. I sat on the counter in the bathroom, waving my legs around; they actually looked kind of long.

"Beeeellllllaaaa," sang Alice as she dried her hands. "You have a crush on Edward."

"Yep, yep," chipped in Rose, "I saw it too!"

"What, I don't like him." I could not like my roommate!

"Oh yeah, you were all snugly with him just now," countered Alice, Rose with an echoing "yeah".

"He was saying that I rock, that I helped him out when I didn't have to." How could they think I like Edward?

"So are you telling me that you don't think he is sexy?" Rose eyed me.

"No, Edward is a very, very sexy man." We all took a moment to think about the sexy man. "But just because I acknowledge that, does not mean I like him!"

"But I think you do," Alice crooned.

"No," I folded my arms. "Alice, you can appreciate how sexy Emmett is, correct?"

"He is a fine specimen of the male gender," nodded Alice, then gave Rose a high five, which they missed terrible, "Good job getting a hottie!"

"And Rose," Rosalie jumped, "You can clearly see how attractive Jasper is."

"That boy does have a fine ass," giggled Rose.

"So then I can say that Edward is gorgeous without you guys jumping me!" I jumped off the counter, content that my point had been made. "Now let's get out of here."

We didn't hang out in the restaurant much longer once we returned from the bathroom. After talking about how hot their boyfriends were, Rose and Alice wanted to get out of there and back home ASAP.

The next morning, I was in pain. Why did I get drunk off of wine? I eased my way off my bed, and hauled myself to my bathroom and see the damage. I still had on makeup from the night before, and the loose curls that I had last night were now a matted mess on my head. I was pleasantly surprised to realize that I was indeed in my pajamas. Apparently I felt the need to wear the new pair that Alice bought me, which turned out to be a set of light pink silk boxer like bottoms, and a matching spaghetti silk top.

After glaring at myself in the mirror for a few painful minutes, I groaned as I gave up and decided to just go out and get something in my stomach.

When I reached the kitchen I saw Edward slowly walking around the kitchen, it didn't look like he was in much better shape. He had on a pair of black sweat pants, and a black wife beater, showing off his very toned and muscular arms. Nice and sexy body… I was reminded of our little girl talk session last night, in the bathroom.

I crawled onto stool that sat by the counter. Edward was pouring some coffee into a cup and was about to drink when I grunted. He lowered the cup away from his face and looked at me. He grunted while shrugging his shoulders, a nonverbal 'what?'

I looked at his cup of coffee and pouted while looking back up at him, pleading with my eyes. Edward rolled his eyes and grabbed a mug from the cabinet to pour me a cup. I gave him a slight smile, still in too much pain to put that kind of effort. It seemed speech was too much to ask for in our hung-over state.

We sat in silence for a long while, letting the coffee settle. After we finished our cups, I got up and made us some cereal, and the silence continued. We eventually made our way back to the living room, and I was the first to speak.

"No more drinking," my voice was low and raspy. "Do you have to go to the office today?"

"No," Edward's velvety voice sounded as hoarse as mine, "Carlisle told me that I have to find a piano that I can practice on. So, I'll have to see if I can find someplace that will let me practice for free."

An idea struck me, and suddenly I was all business. "Get ready and meet me back here in one hour, we are going out," I didn't wait for him to respond, as I made my way to my room to take a shower to wash last night away.

After my shower, I quickly blow dried my hair, not really caring. The end result was slightly messy, but the kind of messy that some people spend hours trying to accomplish. I suppose Edward's outfit inspired me when it came time to get dressed, because I decided to wear a snug pair of jeans and a female white wife beater. Although people in my life are always trying to convince me that I was beautiful, I never really saw it. Sure they can put me in a beautiful dress, give me great hair, and do my make up just right, and then I could possibly see the beautiful person that they talk about. But as I looked at myself now, it was one of those few rare moments, when I felt good about how I looked, and I still felt comfortable.

I walked out of my room and saw Edward sitting on the arm of the couch. He wore jeans and a red shirt that fit him in a way in which there was no mistaking the sculpted body underneath. He looked much better after taking a shower. Hangovers did not suit him.

"So, where are we going?" he voice was back to normal too.

"Out, and that is all I'm going to tell you." I tried to hide my satisfied smile as we turned to head out.

I decided not to spring the surprise on him on our destination just yet, and thought that a detour to the bookstore was needed.

"Why are we here?" Edward asked as we walked in the old little bookshop.

I quickly headed to the music section, thinking that if I moved fast enough, he wouldn't figure out what I was about to do. "I wanted to get a few books. Plus they have this," I pulled a black leather bound notebook and flipped it open, blank lines for music compositions waiting to be filled. "My treat!"

"Bella, you don't have to," Edward grabbed the notebook from me, and turned it over in search of the price tag. "It's 60 dollars! I can't let you get this for me."

"But I want to get you a gift," I pouted; hopping that he was falling for my trick.

Edward let out a sigh and gave me a smile, "Alright, you can buy something else, just not this, it is too expensive."

"Ok, but I will buy you something else." I conceded while trying to hide my victorious grin. I slid the notebook back into its place knowing I would be back later this week for it anyway.

We walked around the little bookstore for about an hour. I purchased the two books I wanted and was about to leave the store with Edward when someone called my name.

"Isabella Swan?" I turned around to see a tall, good looking man who seemed to be about my age. He had short black hair, and bright blue eyes which matched his shirt. He kept his gaze on me as realization hit. "It really is you! You are Isabella Swan, the writer."

"Yes I am," I extended my hand, "You can call me Bella."

"Wow," he took my hand with both of his hands, "I am such a big fan. My name is Ryan, by the way. I read your short stories before I even saw you, but then when I did see you, it was hard to believe such a beautiful woman could write such amazing stories."

I had been complimented hundreds of times, but it seemed no matter how often it happened, I still managed to blush. "Thank you, it is always nice to meet a fan."

"I must say though, you are even more beautiful then what I thought. I mean, to see you in person … you are so hot!" He was still holding my hand, and his friendly smile immediately turned into a creepy grin.

"Hi, I'm Edward," Edward stuck his hand in between Ryan's and mine.

Ryan's smile faded, "Who are you?"

"I am Edward," he said more slowly. "As to who I am in Bella's life," Edward placed his arm around my waist, "I think you can figure it out." And with that he pulled me out of the bookstore.

I was in a cross between shock, and wanting to bust out laughing. After about a block Edward finally released his grip, and looked over his shoulder to see is Ryan was near by.

"Sorry about that," he looked back down to me, "But I didn't get a good feeling about that guy."

I launched into laughter, "No, it is perfectly alright. That guy was creeping me out." I started to walk to our next destination.

"So does that happen a lot?" Edward asked quietly.

"Have my friend whisk me away, alluding that I am their girlfriend, no that was indeed a first."

"No, I mean guys hitting on you like that?" I looked at Edward, and saw that he actually looked concerned.

"Not really," I studied his expression, he looked surprised. "Guys are not that interested in me, never have been."

"What?" Edward looked frustrated, "are you kidding me?"

"Look, I see the way guys gawk at Rose and Alice, no one ever looks at me that way." I had to control my voice, trying not to sound bitter.

"Bella you must be the most oblivious person that I know," Edward stared at me as we walked in silence for a bit. "How about the other part, do fans often approach you?"

I couldn't help but smile, "Not a lot, but definitely a few times a month. It is the most amazing feeling to know that people have read your writing, and they like it!" I took a breath, searching for the right words to express how it felt. "I just can't explain it."

"It looks like it makes you happy," Edward's smile matched mine, "I think I know what feeling you are talking about. It's probably a lot like what I felt when Emmett and Carlisle told me they liked my music."

"And you know what else makes me happy?" I came to a halt. "Pianos."

Edward's face dropped as he saw the piano store, "Bella…"

"So you said I could buy you anything, and I want to buy you a piano." I almost felt like Alice. I wanted to start jumping up and down from excitement… but not enough to actually pull an Alice.

"Bella, I will not let you buy me a piano!" Edward looked truly angry; which, of course, only made me angry.

"Fine," I turned around to enter the store, right as I reached the door I turned back to face him. "I'm going to buy a piano for myself, and if you don't help me, I am probably am going to get ripped off. Hope you can handle that on your conscious."

I don't know what kind of piano we ended up getting. But it was big with a shinny black coat, and it was very classy looking. I asked them to deliver the piano in three days, knowing that I would need time to figure out where the piano would fit in my apartment; something I probably should have thought about before I bought the damn thing.

I decided that I would sell my couch in the sitting room, which would give us just enough room for the piano. Once we set the piano up, and placed the two smaller single chairs on the other side of the room, it looked as if it was always meant to be there.

Edward had not stopped thanking me, even when I told him I bought it for me, he could see through my pathetic lie.

"I know how you can pay me back," it was Friday night, and Edward, the guy who delivered the piano, and I had spent all afternoon trying to set up the piano. I walked out of the kitchen, with two glasses of wine in hand. Edward was sitting on the piano bench, running his fingers lightly across the keys.

"Anything," he whispered. I felt pure joy in my heart as I watched Edward; it made me happy to see him happy.

"Play me something; play me the peace that you played for Emmett and Carlisle." I saw the ends of Edward's mouth fall a little, as he placed his hands over the keys and started to play.

I listened intently as the room began to fill with music. It started out slowly, two distinct voices, one high alto, and one low tenor. The two voices seemed to intertwine, and play off of each other, eventually morphing into a new key. Suddenly, the melody in the bass line began to take over, completely changing the mood of the piece. What was once light, and hopeful became dark and ominous. After a few minutes of rough dissonance, the high alto came back, but it no longer had another melody to converse with. It was all alone, and didn't last long as the bass finally took over. When the bass finally began to fade, all that was left was the tenor from the original melody. It was heartbreaking to hear only half of the melody as it called out for it's partner and not receiving a response. After a few measures, the melody finally faded away, like a heart giving out.

I wanted to cry. I had no idea why, but all I wanted to do was cry for this heartbreaking song.

"That was beautiful," I whispered, trying to hold back tears. "When did you come up with that?" The pain, the heartbreak the piece brought to mind was so real, so raw. The only thing I could only think of that would inspire such pain was the death of his parent's death.

Edward looked at me, his sad green eyes matching the pain from his song, "I wrote it in high school. I wrote it for you."

* * *

So I tried to clear up some things here. Bella douse not like Edward (at least not to her knowledge), his body yes she likes but come on who would not like his body? As for the ages: **Emmett-29. Rose-28. Alice-28. Jasper-28. Edward-28. Bella-27.** So there is that.

The next chapter is called "Date 1"

Oh and a little news for you guys. I am starting school next week, and I will not be posting as often as I have been. I will be posting 1 chapter a week, minimum; but writing this has been pretty easy so I suspect to be able to post 3 a week. But here is hoping. I do promise one a week though.

Hope you enjoyed :)


	8. Date 1

Hello, hello! So an awesome person (smile for the paparazzi) recommended a very cool song. I listened to it and I like how it matches. It is called 'Whoever she is' by: The Maine. So check it out.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you all make me smile!

I do not own Twilight.

Enjoy :)

* * *

Chapter 8- Date 1

"There was so much pain in his eyes. I could see all of it, all of the same pain that I felt as I listened to his music. It was Edward's pain, and I could feel it almost like it was my own." Even now, telling Alice and Rose about it, I could feel a pang in my chest. "He said, 'I wrote it in high school. I wrote it for you.'"

"Wow," Alice and Rosalie both whispered in unison.

Saturday morning found the three of us out at breakfast after I called in reinforcements, needing some serious girl talk time. Alice and Rose sized up my messy bun, comfy jeans, and baggy shirt, and knew something was wrong. They didn't bother to criticize me about my wardrobe choice for once, and I was grateful.

"So what did you do?" Rose eyes were wide with curiosity. She had on a light red summer dress, with a matching sweater for this chilly morning.

"I just stared at him," I admitted with a shrug. "I think I kind of freaked him out. But I didn't know what to say. I was just trying to process all of it."

"So, _have_ you processed it?" Alice asked in a hushed whisper. It was then that I noticed that she wore a similar outfit as Rose, only a light green instead.

"Honestly, I don't know how to feel. How _do_ you respond to something like that?" The conversation was put on hold for a moment as the waiter arrived with our food. I found that I was not that hungry, so I poked at my French toast. "No one has ever written something about me."

"But he said he wrote it _for_ you and not _about_ you?" Alice asked as she took a bite from her poached eggs.

I nodded, "He said that he wanted to apologize to me for the longest time after the party, but he could never find the words." I paused to take a sip of coffee. "So then he wrote the song. He told me he never thought that he would ever get the chance to play it for me, for anyone. Then he actually apologized! He said that he felt horrible for using my song to get him his job, but he felt that is was the truest most paramount peace he has written."

"Why would he apologize?" Rose shoved her spoon into her cottage cheese.

"I have no idea. I told him he was being stupid, and that it was _his_ composition and he could use it however he could." I took a bight from my toast starting to feel hungry. "I can tell that he still feels awful about the whole party incident."

"Well he should." It might have sounded like a mean thing for Rose to say, but she was just a very blunt person. "I mean you let him off way too easily. All those years of pain, and he is forgiven from one little apology?" She shrugged, "I would have made him work for forgiveness."

"Rose it doesn't matter how hard someone works for forgiveness in my opinion. If they don't mean it, then it's pointless." I looked back down at my plate thinking back to when he originally apologized. "And I know he really feels bad about everything, so what is the point of making him jump through hoops?"

"So what else happened?" Alice asked, getting the conversation back on track.

"Not much after that. He told me that he would make everything up to me one day. He told me I saved him." I started to blush as I thought about the intensity that his green eyes held last night. "Which is just ridiculous, because anyone would have helped someone in need."

"Even if that were true," Rose spoke in a soft voice, "A normal person would not help someone who they would categorize as an enemy, and then befriend them. Only you would do something like that."

Over the next two weeks, Edward and I settled into a comfortable routine. During the weekdays I would get up around 6:30 to begin my day. By the time I was showered and dressed I would find Edward in the kitchen making a pot of coffee. I would then get us a bowl of cereal, and we would eat while I read a book, and Edward read the newspaper.

Eventually I would settle myself on the couch with a cup of tea and my laptop, while I wrote the stories that streamed through my mind. While I wrote, Edward would practice his music. He never played my song, but I did get a chance to hear many of his other compositions. There was one song that I really liked; it was a light and playful song with the high alto and low tenor that reminded me of my song, only with this song the two keys danced around each other.

I asked him where the inspiration from this song came from, and was surprised to see a faint pink color tint his cheeks. He was blushing!

"You … again." His head was down, staring at his hands, avoiding my gaze. "I wrote it before the party. You were very fun to talk to."

"How many did you write about me?" I laughed, trying to ease his worries. I didn't want him to be embarrassed about it. "Don't worry; I think it is very sweet, I absolutely love this song."

After that, he began each practice with that song; he named it Friendship Part One. I did learn that he wrote a few more songs about me. Some were about how he used to watch over me my senior year, to see how I was doing. I quickly picked up that the high alto voice was _my_ voice.

There were many other songs that had a high soprano note, and he told me that it was about Lauren. At first he was hesitant to play the songs that he wrote about her, but I assured him that his music was too beautiful to be trashed just because it was about Lauren.

Some days I would go out with Alice, and some days he would go hang out with Jasper, or even Emmett. But every night we would eat dinner and talk until it was time to go to bed. It was a nice routine; a routine I never would have thought was possible had someone asked me just a month ago.

It was a Wednesday night when Rose called me with some exciting news.

"Bella, we found the first guy! Well, Emmett picked him." Emmett, Jasper, Edward, Rose, and Alice had all thrown in 100 dollars in a pot which sat in my room. It was decided that whoever introduced the guy I liked the most, they would win the five hundred dollars. It took some time, and a lot of pouting, before they convinced me to go along with this stupid bet. It was entirely too tempting to keep the money for myself.

"Who is he?" I was sitting on the couch with Edward, in the middle of watching a movie. He gave me a questioning look, so I placed my hand over the phone and whispered, "The first guy was picked."

"Here Emmett wants to tell you himself," I heard Rose speak away from the phone, "Calm down, I'm giving you the phone."

"Bella?"

"Hey Emmett," I started to think about what kind of guy Emmett would choose for me, God I hope he was not a wrestler.

"Ok, so I was watching TV the other day, and there is this show where the main guy is a secret agent, and he saves the world practically every single day while keeping his identity a secret." I could hear the excitement in his voice.

"Yeah, I have heard about that show," it was not really my type of show. I usually preferred comedies, and the one that Emmett was talking about was a little bit too dramatic for my taste.

"Well, my pick is the guy who plays the main character; Jeff Guy, his name is Mike Newton."

I brought my brows together trying to remember what he looked like. "So what is he like?"

"If he is anything like his character, then he is really cool, with some good one liners." I could picture Emmett smiling with pride.

"Wait! Are you trying to tell me you know nothing about this guy?" Edward looked at me with a suspicious smile.

"But Jeff Guy is really cool, some of that has to be Mike." I could practically hear Emmett's bottom lip sticking out in a pout.

"Ok, thanks Emmett. Can you put Rose back on the phone?" I shook my head ruefully.

"Hey Bella." I heard Rose answer sounding almost apologetic.

"Rose, we know nothing about this guy." I complained. This dating thing didn't sound that bad at first, but now that it's happening I don't think I want a part of this anymore.

"I know Bella, but really, Emmett could not have picked a more perfect guy. His TV show is number one, and his popularity is on the rise." I could tell she was about to put on her pleading voice; the one that she's used many times over the years. "It is just one date Bella. I promise if you don't like him, you'll never have to see him again."

"Fine, when is the date?" I grumbled, slumping in the couch. I knew I must have looked like a spoiled child not getting their way, but I could care less.

"Friday," Rose sounded relieved. "He will pick you up at 8 o'clock sharp. Alice will come over a few hours before."

"Friday it is." I conceded with no attempt at fake enthusiasm. I have a bad feeling about this.

I knew it! I knew something bad would happen! And look! Everything was falling apart, and the date hasn't even started! I finally convinced myself that I would not back out, all I had to do was have Alice come over make me look nice, and just go out and have dinner. What could go wrong with that? Famous last words …

Well, Alice's sister decided to go into labor this morning, and Alice had to fly out to the fucking east coast! So, needless to say, I was having a panic attack.

"I don't know what to wear!" I yelled throwing myself on my bed. My hair was blown dry, and I even managed to straight iron my hair. I still hadn't put any make up on, because I still didn't know what I was going to wear. Which left me in my towel, in hysterics, face down on my bed, having a panic attack.

Edward was sitting on my bed next to me, listening as I threw my little temper tantrum. "You spent 5 years with Alice. I have to believe that you must have picked up some knowledge on how to dress during that time."

I rolled to my side, making sure that my towel was in place, and tried to plead my case. "But they want me to become a fashionista!" Edward had to bight back a laugh. "And there might be people who will take pictures of me, and then I will look like an idiot and probably wear a shirt as a dress or something."

"Go try something on, and I'll help you out," Edward offered as he bumped his shoulder up against mine.

"You? What makes you think you're qualified to take on a fashion challenged person like me?" I challenged with a raised eyebrow.

"Lauren worked at a department store." He shrugged, and looked away briefly. "She always kept up to date with the latest fashions, and thus kept me up to date as well."

Well, that was better then my resume.

I stood up getting ready to walk in my closet, "So, if my life were a movie, would this be where the corny music montage would start?"

I could almost see it in my head. The cheesy music in the background, the moving clips of funny moments strung together with cliché transitions. If my life were a movie, that's what would be playing on the screen right now. I would go into my closet try on the outfit that I had in mind, then I would come out have Edward critique me and I would be back to the drawing board. I ultimately tried on 6 outfits before Edward approved my apparel.

I was just finishing up my makeup when I heard the doorbell ring. "Crap!" I started to smear on lip gloss. "Edward, could you please get that for me?"

"I'm on it!" I heard him say before the door to my room closed. Another five minuets passed as I primped myself. I had on a deep violet colored dress that only reach knee length and had a very revealing V neckline. I was finishing the last strap to my paten leather high heals when Edward came back into my room.

"Ok, I'm ready," I stood up from my bed and did a little twirl to show off my outfit. "And the final verdict is…"

"You look great," Edward placed his hand over his heart, "I could not be more proud."

"Aw, you're funny," I said sarcastically as I grabbed a matching black paten leather purse. "So what is he like?"

Edward let out a snort, "You will definitely have an interesting time."

I didn't have time to think about what Edward meant as I rushed out my door. Mike Newton was tall, not as tall as Edward, but he still had some height on me. He had light blond hair that was spiked, resembling how his character wore it. He had a boyish look about him and I could see why he would be worthy to star in his own TV show. He had light blue eyes but they didn't seem to have the same kind of depth that my friends had.

He had on a nice pair of black slacks, with a white button up shirt. The top few buttons were left untouched to show his chest. It reminded me of a bad 70's outfit.

Mike walked to me, looking me up from head to toe, and then back up at a disturbingly slow pace. He had a grin on his face, as if he was about to eat his favorite meal. I held out my hand to give him a hand shake, but I was caught off guard when he grabbed my hand and brought it up to his face. I shivered as I felt his lips meet the back of my hand; and not the good kind of shiver, but the get-me-out-of-here kind of shiver.

"Hello Isabella," it sounded as if he was trying to be sexy, but it was having the opposite effect. I heard Edward cover up his laugh by coughing.

"Hi, Mike." I pulled my hand away from him, and tried to discreetly wipe the back of my hand on my dress. Edward started to 'cough' even more.

"That sounds pretty bad bro," Mike looked over to Edward, a dramatic look of concern covered his face. Oh no, he was a bro-man.

"No, no. I'm fine…bro," Edward erupted into another cough attack. "Maybe I should get something to drink." He looked at Mike and gave him a nod, then looked at me, "Have fun."

"Hope you don't choke!" I yelled back to him as I faced Mike. "So let's go."

We took Mike's black Porsche, and I was surprised to realize that this was one of the few cars that I did recognize. "Isn't this a Boxer S?"

"Yes it is!" he seemed really proud. I wonder if he realized that it was a 'chick' car. The only reason I knew was because Alice wanted me to get one at one point.

On the drive to the restaurant Mike told me that I could pick out whatever CD I wanted to listen to, and so I did. I opened his case, and nearly broke into a fit of laughter with what I found. I saw that he had the Clay Akins CD on the front page. The next several pages held Lindsey Lohan, Nick Lasher, followed by an onslaught of want-to-be rappers. I was surprised when I found Gym Class Hero's, a decent band. But when I put in the CD, he made a face.

"Don't you like Gym Class?" I asked, "They were in your CD collection."

"A friend bought it for me, but we can listen to them I guess," he didn't sound very enthusiastic. It figures that the one good CD in his entire collection, and he didn't even like it.

When we reached the restaurant I was astonished to see a mob of paparazzi hanging outside, and they were waiting for us. I live in Seattle, and I've never seen anything like this except on the news or in movies. Where did these guys come from? They were all screaming and asking questions, trying to get me to answer.

"Isabella, Isabella," it sounded as if my name was being shouted from every angle. "How long have you been dating Mike?" I heard one say.

"What do you feel about his TV show?"

"What is he like in bed?"

This was the first time I had even met Mike! And they were already asking me if he was good in bed? Crazy. Thankfully, Rose told me what to say if people started to ask questions.

"Mike and I are just friends," I tried to raise my voice higher so that I could be heard.

"So your friend flew all the way from LA just for dinner?" someone asked, clearly not convinced.

I turned to Mike in shock. "You flew all the way here from LA?"

"Anything for you, friend." Mike placed his hand on my lower back as he guided me into the little Italian building. When he started to lower his hand closer to my butt, I jumped and almost knocked over one of the camera men.

Every eye in the restaurant was on us as we made our way to our table. I could hear their whispers, making me blush uncontrollably.

"Is that Mike Newton?"

"Yes, it is! He is cute in person too!"

"Who is he with?"

"I think that is Isabella Swan, she is a writer."

"Hmph, she probably can't write worth crap,"

"Actually I hear she is really good,"

"Hmm, she is pretty I guess."

"Yeah, if he was going to choose someone, I suppose she could work."

"They make such a cute couple,"

"I know, I wonder if they are going to get married."

And that ladies and gentlemen, that is how rumors are made. It took everything I had not to stand on the table and announce to everyone that we are not on a date, and that this is a friendly dinner damn it!

"So have you ever been to Seattle before?" I asked trying to tune out the chatter of people.

"Nope, this is the first time." Mike grabbed a slice of bread from the bread basket on the table, tore a peace off and literally threw it in his mouth. Nice.

"How do you like it so far? It takes some time to get use to the weather." I tried not to stare at the peace of bread that was hanging on the corner of his mouth.

"I just came in this morning, and nothing's really stood out or made an impression. But now, there is a very nice view." Mike's eyes looked down at my chest, and locked onto my cleavage, lingering long enough to make me want to wear turtleneck for the rest of my life.

"Yeah," I said slowly. Luckily the waiter interrupted Mike's gaze before I had to snap my finger to get his attention.

"Mr. Newton, Ms. Swan, what can I get you to drink this evening?" Our waiter was a short little man, whose stomach was in danger of knocking down our salt and pepper shaker, he reminded me of Mario from the Nintendo games.

"I will have a martini," Mike winked, and I had to suppress my gag reflex.

I could tell the waiter was trying not to roll his eyes as he looked away from Mike, and I was right there with him. "And what can I get for you Ms. Swan?"

"A lemonade please." I smiled. Our waiter excused himself.

"You're not having anything thing to drink?" Mike looked let down.

Yeah right, and give you the slightest chance of my being impaired, no thank you. "No, I am not really in the mood for alcohol tonight." That was sort of the truth.

"So you must watch my TV show?" Mike had a smug smile on his face.

"Truthfully no, but I have heard good things about it though." I offered. Maybe I should have you-tubed an episode last night.

"Oh," he sounded disappointed, "But you must have heard of me somewhere, I mean you did ask to date me."

"What?" I could not help a little laugh come out.

"Your agent called my agent and set up this little thing." Mike's smiled, showing his unnaturally white teeth.

"Err, not quite." I tried to sound as nice I could while I explained. "My friend is a fan of your TV show, and he thought you looked nice." No need to tell him about the bet. It wasn't like Emmett had a chance of winning at this point.

"Oh," Mike looked down the bread in his hand. "So your friend is a fan?" his smile came right back a little too quickly. "You should tell him that I do all my own stunts."

"Wow that is really cool, what kind of stunts do you do?" I didn't have to fake interest with this topic; maybe this dinner would be bearable.

"Well I do the fight scenes, sort of, but the bigger stuff is done by other people."

Maybe not.

The waiter then came back with our drinks, thankfully interrupting us. "Have you decided on what to eat?"

"I will have the lasagna," Mike announced like it was it was the best decision he made all day.

I hadn't even looked at the menu, too distracted by the self absorbed, egotistical, Mike Newton. I quickly glanced down, and said the first thing I saw, "The mushroom ravioli please."

"So you are like a writer or something?" Mike asked once the waiter left.

"Yeah, or something." My will to try to make this a successful dinner left about the same moment that it started.

"I Googled you, you write poems," Mike took a sip from his drink.

"Short stories actually." Try not to be short with him, I chanted to myself. I need to just try.

"Yeah, same thing," he waved his hand, dismissing what I said. "I am just surprised that you can make a living off of that, I mean reading is like Latin."

"What do you mean?" I immediately started to compare what the two have in similarities. What did that even mean? Reading is like Latin?

"Like, Latin is a dead language, and reading is on its way out," he shrugged.

"Are you seriously telling me that one day reading in general will be obsolete?" Please tell me that this guy was kidding me. I was half tempted to start searching the restaurant looking for the camera crew, or for someone to jump out and say, 'you've been punk'd!'

"No!" he laughed, "We need to read stuff. But like, books, why read books when you can see people like me act it out?"

"Books offer a more in depth look to the psyche of the characters that acting could never accomplish." He was really starting to irritate me.

"Hey! I am a really good actor." Mike crossed his arms, and his tone turned defensive.

"An actor that can't even do his own stunts," I hissed under my breath. Stupid Rose and her stupid blind date idea.

We sat in silence for some time before our food finally arrived, and I think we were both glad for the distraction that the food brought.

"I've seen you on some magazine covers." I tried to restart the conversation on a safer topic - him. "Which one was your favorite?"

As long as I kept the focus on him, the conversation went smooth enough. Mike insisted that we split an ice cream sundae, and I ended up giving in despite how desperately I wanted to just go home and forget this night ever happened. I heard the chatter in the restaurant increase as I split the banana slip with him.

Oh no. I could see the headlines already … Hot upcoming star, Mike Newton, spends a romantic night alone with author Isabella Swan. Sources close to the couple say that they are just 'good friends,' but this columnist doesn't by that line for one moment, not with the chemistry between those two! Was it me, or was that ice cream melting faster than normal due to the heat those two were giving off?

When we left the restaurant we were once again met by the herd of men with cameras flashing, and their questions and allegations flying. I crammed myself in the small girly car, and prayed that we would get all green lights. I was tense as I sat in my seat, hands on my lap, while I counted down the blocks. 13 blocks to go.

"This is the best set up date that I have been on," I risked a glance at Mike, only to see that he was beaming away as he checked himself out in the rearview mirror. At least one of us finds him attractive.

"It was definitely interesting," I managed to say. 10 more blocks.

"I mean, I feel like I can really talk to you Bella," he flashed me his blinding fake smile. I wonder if he does commercials for that stuff that brightens your teeth?

"You do talk." I clenched my teeth together in an effort to maintain my composure. 6 more blocks.

"I am so happy I came here. At first, I wasn't sure what it would be like to go out with a book chick." He gave me a serious look, "most of the time they are very ugly. But I am glad to find that is not the case here."

3 more blocks. "Thanks Mike."

Mike pulled into the parking garage in the guest parking area. My plan was to say a quick goodnight in the car, so I wouldn't have to risk kissing him. But much to my dismay, he stopped the car and walked with me to the elevator.

I made sure to keep my hands to myself, and no where within his reach. I don't think I took a single breath on the ride up to the top floor. The whole time Mike kept taking steps closer to me, telling me how much fun he had.

And now, I was currently in the position that I was desperately trying to avoid; the goodbye at the door.

"Well, this was…fun Mike," I concentrated on my body language, making sure that I was not giving out signals of wanting to be kissed just in case he was paying attention. I had my arms crossed, and I was leaning away from him, and kept my eyes anywhere but on him.

"I had a lot of fun too Bella," his voice was an attempt at low and husky, but not in the attractive way. Instead, it sounded like he had something stuck in his throat.

"Goodnight Mike." I started to lean closer to the door, the link to my safe haven.

But in my attempt to not be too rude, I moved to slow. Mike grabbed my waist, and pulled me to him. "Bella, I really like you. And I think there are a lot more ways for you and me to have fun."

I didn't have time to respond, and the next thing I knew, his face crashed into mine - tongue first. Considering the speed in which he attacked, I would have thought he would have landed on my cheek. Sadly, he did manage to meet my lips, forcing them open with his wet and slimy tongue. He reminded me of a dog, the way he just kept lapping my tongue urging me to respond. I pulled away as much as I could, but that just seemed to get him even more wound up. So I figured to just let it run its course, until he got bored or realized that I wasn't into the kiss at all. Well, that was my thought until he let out a moan, and I could feel him at full attention as he pressed into me.

I couldn't pull my self away, so I decided to just bite his lip, and not a sexy playful bight.

"Ouch!" Mike slid his finger over his lips, eyes wide with … excitement? "You are one hot, feisty girl!"

"Yeah, goodnight Mike." This time I didn't make the mistake of moving slowly. I quickly turned, and unlocked my door and slid my way in before he could try anything else.

"Can we do this again?" he called.

"No!" I yelled through the door, no longer caring about being rude. I'd had enough!

I felt his saliva on my chin, and I had the worst taste in my mouth. I walked to my room, and saw Edward sitting in the living room watching a movie, trying to hold back laughter.

He was watching Saving Private Ryan; not the kind of movie that usually inspires laughter.

"That kiss must have been something if you can't even move." He managed to say while still watching the TV.

"You saw through the peep whole?" it was not really a question since he broke out laughing before I finished asking my question. I let out a huff of air, and stomped off to my room. "I hate you." Once I was in my room, I went straight to my bathroom to brush my teeth. It took me a few times before I got the taste of Mike Newton out. Now if only I could get reimbursed for the last couple hours of my life …

* * *

I hope you guys are not too angry with me for how I started this chapter, and not actually writing about how it all went down. But it just felt weird to pick up where I left off in the last chapter.

Haha the Mike Newton kiss, how he was kissing her like a dog, well unfortunately I had a kiss like that EWW. I was driving a friend home (he was a little tipsy, don't worry I was sober) and he was all "you are such a cool friend Jac," well reread that paragraph and that was what happened to me haha.

The next chapter is called "Happy Birthday Bella" I am still debating what Edward should get Bella, but we will see. Any ideas?

Hope you enjoyed :)


	9. Happy Birthday Bella

* * *

Alright, so let start off with some news. I now have TWO betas. Both are awesome. Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter. So please give them a round of virtual applause.

Second. I am now back in school, sophomore in college, so just a reminder that I will probably slow down, but I promise you one chapter a week. But now that I have two betas it is going to take a wee bit long. But at least the spelling and grammar with be better!!

And thirdly, as I must comment on every time, you guys are all amazing. Your reviews, wanting to be alerted, all of it!

**ABOUT THE STORY: **OK, so here are some questions you guys have asked. Is the song Friend Ship part 1, Bella's lullaby. NOPE. That will come up later but as of now, no. FP1 is a happy song written about when Edward and Bella were first friends back in high school.

No one has asked, but I felt like I need to put it out there, this is a Bella X Edward story. I'm not a Jacob hater, he is awesome too, but come on… Edward (Gasp, I just gave you guys a slight clue there)

I do not own Twilight.

Enjoy. :)

* * *

Chapter 9- Happy Birthday Bella

Rose could not have been more thrilled with all of the press and gossip my date with Mike had earned. This past week, she spent countless hours on the phone with various magazines and online gossip blogs. She kept it simple, saying that Mike and I were just friends and that dinner was a dinner for old friends trying to catch up.

The next day at the grocery store I saw a popular magazine on the stand that caught my eye. The cover was about some actress who had lost a lot of weight, but in the right hand corner of the cover was a picture of me and Mike in the restaurant, leaning in for the ice cream we were splitting. The headline below it said, "Newton and Swan a couple?" I slipped the magazine into my pile of food for check out.

I was glad that Edward was out with Jasper at the gym, so I could pull out the magazine without being tortured. I flipped to the page that the table of context said I would be. It was a one page article with pictures of our arrival, eating dinner, and leaving. The arrival picture was when Mike had his hand on my lower back, I was looking up at him; this was when I had asked him if he had flown from LA. They were all clearly selected to insinuate that we were more than just friends.

The dinner picture was the one on the cover, Mike and I were both leaning into each other, however the ice cream could barely be seen and it looked like we were both getting very cozy. In the picture of us leaving, I had a small smile on my face. The magazine had said that it was a smile from love, I knew the truth though; I was relieved to finally be leaving.

There were interviews from various people in the restaurant. One woman said that I could not keep my hands off of him when I know, very well, that I had not touched him once during dinner! Another woman told them that Mike and I talked about his career the majority of the dinner (that part was true at least) and that I sounded really supportive. Well at least they didn't hear about the kiss.

Mike sent flowers for a few days, all with a notes saying how much he wanted to see me again. Rose was loving all the news that this was causing, and was more than disappointed when I told her to end it with Mike's agent.

Edward continued to tease me about The Newton Attack, as he dubbed it. I almost killed him when he told Jasper and Emmett, not leaving out any details. Now whenever Emmett sees me, he'll start making kissing noises and wiggle his tongue around. I informed him that it didn't matter who my other dates were, he had lost the stupid bet. He looked disappointed for about a second before continuing to make the kissing noises, earning him a slap from Rose.

It was nice when the buzz about my date started to die down during the following weeks, but it made me worry about how the media would react when I went on my other dates. Luckily, no one seemed inspired to pick a guy for me for the time being.

Rose was busy with her other clients; apparently one kid that she was representing did not take her seriously and they ended up fighting with each other daily.

Emmett was fully engrossed with the new music department along with Edward, who had been called in to begin recording his pieces. Each night, Edward would come home with a wide smile on his face and would keep me up for a few hours as he told me about what it was like to record. It was great to see him so happy.

Alice was also preoccupied with her other clients, some of whom were more difficult than others. One woman, in particular, had Alice more tied up than usual; she was a 50 something woman trying to look like a 20 something girl. I believe that this is the longest that I have gone without shopping. I almost miss it... almost… not really.

Even Jasper was unusually busy for once. Evidently, archaeologists had just excavated a canon from the civil war along with many other weapons that were used during that time. Apparently this was a big find, but there is a lot of skepticism on whether these items were authentic, so Jasper was sent out to the south, crushing my hopes of being able to hang out with anyone.

So as my birthday approached I really didn't think that anyone would remember it, which was fine with me. Each year I tell everyone not to get me any gifts or to make any kind of fuss over me; I loath, with all the passion that one person may possess, when anyone buys me a gift. I'm not sure why, but I would always feel guilty when they did. I think it is because when I was younger, money was always tight, both when I lived with my mom _and_ when I lived with my dad. I was very aware of our money situation, and whenever my parents would buy me a gift, I would be angry, worrying that they shouldn't have wasted their money on me.

This year seemed to be my lucky year; no one had mentioned my birthday once, at least until two days before the actual day. On Thursday night I was blow drying my hair after taking a shower to wash the smell of the gym off of me. I was in a particularly good mood, feeling all nice and clean. I had just changed my sheets, and I was wearing a new pair of blue pajama pants and a matching blue spaghetti top. And it seemed that all my friends had work plans for Saturday night, my birthday; well all except one.

There was a knock on my bedroom door, I automatically yelled for Edward to come in. He was all ready for bed, in his black pajama bottoms and grey wife beater.

"What's up?" I turned off my blow drier and shook out my hair from the pent up heat.

"I'm checking in on you," Edward casually leaned against the door frame.

"You saw me a half hour ago," I raised an eyebrow in suspicion. "I think you're getting a little too attached, Edward. I'm might have to start calling you needy."

"Not what I meant," laughed Edward. "I'm just surprised that you haven't mentioned your birthday yet."

I gulped, and attempted to play it cool. "How did you know my birthday is coming up?"

"Bella, you really underestimate exactly how much I pay attention," Edward followed me out to my room.

I crawled onto my bed, and leaned against the headboard with my legs crossed and a giant pillow within my grasp. "I never told you when my birthday is."

"Yes you did, back in high school." Edward sat on the end of my bed.

"Ok, now that is just creepy. How do you remember that?" I can't believe how much attention he paid to me back in high school.

"Your birthday is on the thirteenth, which I think is quite fitting with how clumsy you are. And it is the month of September, which just happens to be the same month as my mother's." He shrugged as if to prove that is was no big deal. I could barely remember when Phil's birthday is.

"Ok, so what if is this Saturday?" I narrowed my eyes, trying to dare him to argue me. "I don't want to do anything."

"Well I do," Edward stared right back, taking on my dare.

"Everyone is busy, so we can't go out," I countered.

"It is not their birthday," he smiled, "You are not busy, and they don't have to be there."

"So what? It would just be the two of us?" I didn't like the smile on his face. It was as if he knew something I didn't.

"Just the two of us," he nodded.

"Well the answer is still no," I huffed, folding my arms. "I don't want anyone to make any kind fuss over me."

Edward stood up, took one step, and was already at my side, his eyes bearing down at me. "Bella," his voice was low, and rumbled like velvet thunder. "I am going to take you to a birthday dinner. I also still owe you a thank you dinner for everything you have done for me. Now, I am going to offer this to you once: you can either accept the two dinners to a decent restaurant, or you can combine the them into one, which will take place this Saturday at a nice restaurant with no complaints from you."

I was too mesmerized with his voice and smoldering eyes to really understand what he was saying. An "Ok," was all I could manage.

"Ok to the one nice dinner without any complaints this Saturday?" Edward asked as he stepped away with a smug smile.

"Ok," damn my lack of vocabulary.

Edward was being very secretive about our dinner destination. I don't really think you could call this dinner though, seeing as how our reservations were at four, a very odd time for dinner. Edward told me it was the only time they had available; that and he didn't want to give me enough time to think of a way to back out of our agreement. It just proved how well he knew me, because I know I most likely would have continued to try and think a way out of this.

Friday was spent trying to convince him to let me pay for the dinner, but he told me he had it covered, to which I reminded him that he needed to save his money. But to be honest, I was surprised how well Carlisle was paying him so soon after signing him. We were all amazed with how quickly Edward's songs were being sold. TV shows, movies, or producers in general were all interested in Edward's music. He was already paying for the water bill, and splitting the electricity bill with me. So my argument of him not having any money for him to spend didn't hold up anymore.

It was Saturday night and I had spent the past hour getting ready, as Edward had insisted that we dress to impress tonight. I wore a fitted black wraparound dress that had a slit riding up to my mid thigh. I awkwardly tried to adjust myself, not quite used to how much cleavage I was showing at the moment. I gave myself loose curls that rested on my shoulders and slid down my back. I slipped on my black pumps and grabbed my clutch bag as I made my way to the living room.

If I wasn't so dazzled by how good looking Edward was, I would have laughed. We matched. He wore a black button top that looked to be made out of the same material of my dress; he also had a lighter black tie on that matched his lighter black pants. With all the black he was wearing, it made his hair and green eyes shine even more so.

Edward smiled with excitement when he saw me. Jeez this was just dinner, what did he have to be so excited about?

"You look beautiful," Edward crooned as he stepped closer with an enthusiastic smile.

"You don't look half bad yourself," I let my hair fall in my face to hide my blush.

Edward was at my side and extended his arm, "Shall we?"

I laughed as I slid my arm into his, "We shall. Lead the way!"

The restaurant was absolutely gorgeous. It was part of a very fancy hotel and was known to have famous guests ranging from politicians to what little celebrities visited Seattle. However at this time during the day the atmosphere felt more relaxed, for which I was very grateful.

There was a blues band playing on a small stage, and there was a dance floor directly in front of it. Everyone was talking and atmosphere of the room felt very lively. As the hostess lead us to our table I once again could not help but notice as every woman in the room was looking at Edward. But as I looked to him, checking for his reaction, I noticed he didn't look at any one of those girls.

It was quite obvious that everybody was assuming that we were together; I mean, you don't just send out glares like that to just anyone. I didn't care about their assumptions because I knew Edward was just my friend, but I could easily guess what their thoughts were. I bet they were all wondering what a girl like me was doing with this Greek god like man. Hell, I would even wonder that if we were together and if I was one of them. Luckily I didn't have to ponder such things.

Once we sat down, Edward ordered a bottle of champagne. I rolled my eyes when he said that my birthday deserved to be celebrated to the fullest. Throughout the dinner, we laughed, talked, and joked. I hated to admit it, but I was really enjoying it. The waitress came back to take our plates, the whole time eyeing Edward shamelessly. Just as she was about to leave, Edward called her closer and whispered something in her ear. Her eyes glazed over and a dreamy smile appeared on her face. I don't know what he said, but suddenly she looked over at me and glowered.

Once she left I looked at a very smug Edward, "What did you say to her?"

"Nothing," he replied casually, a mischievous smile on his face.

"Don't give me that! I want to know." Wow, I really can sound like an immature little child sometimes.

"I told her to make sure the check goes to me, even if you try to fight for it."

"And you dazzled her to get your way," I shook my head in mock disappointment. "You need to use your powers for good, Edward, not evil."

His stupid smug-ass smile grew, "Do I dazzle you?"

I laughed, "You are an arrogant little shit, you know that?"

"How is asking a question being arrogant?"

"So would you go out with her?" I asked changing the subject.

"Who?" Edward looked around then realized I was speaking about our waitress. "No, not my type."

"Are you going to start dating again?" It had been a couple months since the whole break up fiasco with Lauren. I knew it was only a matter of time before he got back out there, but I wasn't sure when. I also knew that each person had their own time table when it came to getting over something like a breakup.

Edward let out a tired sigh, he obviously had been thinking about this subject. "Well, therein lies the problem," he looked at me sheepishly. "I have never dated before."

I felt my mouth drop. "I guess that makes sense," I spoke slowly, "You never dated anyone before Lauren?"

"Nope, she was my first kiss, my first girlfriend, my first everything." He leaned back in his chair.

As I processed his words, a small giggle escaped. Edward looked a little hurt that I would laugh about his situation, but I quickly explained. "No, I was just remembering how back in high school, you were Big Bad Edward, who had his girlfriend and everyone knew you went all the way," Edward let out a little laugh at my high school terminology. "And then I realized that I am actually more experienced than you."

Edward's smile dropped and a stern protective looked replaced it. "What do you mean by that?"

"Well, you have only slept with one person…" I trailed off suggestively with a shrug.

"How many guys have you slept with?"

I raised an eyebrow at his tone, "I should be offended that you would ask me such a personal question."

"Hey, you brought up this subject." Edward kept his intent gaze on me.

I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment, instantly regretting poking fun at him. Everyone in the group knew how many people everyone had slept with, but I felt awkward telling Edward, I don't know why.

"Two," I squeaked. "My ex boyfriend Jason; we dated during my sophomore year in college. And Blake, we dated for a little over a year in a half; we broke up two years ago."

A wave of relief flowed through Edward and he laughed, "Wow, you are _way_ more experienced then I am."

I narrowed my eyes, "So I slept with only two guys, but I have been on a ton of dates, which is way more then you." I stuck my tongue out at him. "I win."

"So why did you break up with those very _experienced_ guys?"

"Jason was so sweet when we first started dating," I let out a sigh, "I thought I was in love with him, but I guess it must have been because he was the first guy who paid attention to me." I shook my head. "Anyway he got into the whole party thing in college and wanted to spread his oats. He, at least had the decency to break up with me before he cheated, however he did hook up with some sorority chick the hour later."

Edward looked angry as I told him the story. I decided to skip to the other guy before he asked any questions. "As for Blake, he was a writer too; only more of the stereotypical kind of a writer; you know quiet, moody, no-one-understands-me kind of a thing. I loved him, but even then I knew I was not _in_ love with him. At any rate, as my career grew, his support became less. He didn't like how I was doing better than him, and he left."

"I'm sorry," Edward's voice sounded truly concerned. "They are both fools."

I smiled, letting him know I was ok. "I'm not hurting. I mean it sucked at the time, but I know that I was never meant to be with either one of them, so it's all alright."

The blues band that had been playing in the background suddenly started to pick up the pace with a faster, louder song. I noticed couples getting up to go dance, they all looked so happy.

"Do you want to dance?" I had to laugh at Edward's serious expression when he asked. "Why are you laughing at me?" he demanded.

"I'm sorry," I breathed, "But you cannot be serious. You have seen first hand how clumsy I am just walking, that translates to dance as well."

Edward stood up from his chair, walked to my side and held his hand out for me, "It's all in the leading."

I looked skeptically at his hand. Did I really want to risk injury on my birthday?

"Bella," Edward whispered to me, a nervous look on his face as he glanced around the room. "You are going to make me look like an idiot if don't accept my offer."

I looked around and saw several women watching as Edward still held his hand for me. "Well maybe you should not have asked."

"Bella…" he whined.

I let out a dramatic breath and grabbed his hand, "Your feet," I muttered.

Edward held my right hand, while I clung on for dear life to his shoulder with my left. At first, I did step on his toes - I giggled while Edward grimaced. But after a few songs, I was starting to get the hang of this whole dancing thing. Maybe it was because I was dancing with Edward, and I didn't have to feel all self-conscious around him.

Somewhere along the way the blues music started to mix with swing. Edward would twirl me or spin me out from his arms, and I would scream causing the people in the restaurant to look over at us. My face felt like it would be permanently red as I squealed again as Edward spun me back to him. I let out a "humph" as I crashed into his chest, just as Edward grabbed onto me, making sure that I did not fall as we both laughed.

_I see trees of green... red roses too  
I see 'em bloom... for me and for you  
And I think to myself... what a wonderful world._

I loosened my grip on Edward as I heard the slow song start to play. But just as I was about to walk away Edward grabbed my arm and brought me back to him. He took my right hand in his left, while I slid my left arm onto his shoulder, and he wrapped his right arm around my waist pulling me closer.

At first I was stunned by how I instantly responded to him without thinking.

I was looking somewhere off to the side not really paying attention; I felt something strange as I danced with Edward as my mind reeled. I felt like there was something flying around in my stomach. Hmm, must have been something I ate. Still, I felt… actually, I'm not sure what I felt.

I was a little too preoccupied by the warmth of Edward's body as I leaned into him, resting my head on his chest. The hand which was still in Edward's grasp started to tingle and I was all too aware of the hand that rested on my lower back. I wanted to think about these things, and figure out what exactly it was that I felt, but I couldn't concentrate on anything for more than a second because I felt very, very light headed.

What was up with the food here?

I managed to pull myself together so that I could look up at Edward to see how he was holding up. If I wasn't so light headed, I might have jumped. I was stunned by his emerald eyes looking intently at me. I saw his brows pull slightly together, as if he were confused. But the closer I looked, his eyes didn't seem confused, instead they held something different all together – I couldn't place it.

The song ended and I heard the other couples on the dance floor clap as the band excused themselves for a break. Edward still held me, and I was too lost to move. Something, however, did catch his attention as reality dawned on him. An excited smile spread on his face as he continued to hold my hand and drag me back to our table.

As soon as we were off the dance floor, it seemed that whatever mist was swirling around and had me dazed was gone. With a clear mind, I realized that whatever was going on with me must have had to do with the food. Right as Edward sat me down, I saw our waitress walking towards me with a small chocolate cake in her hand, and a strained smile on her face. I groaned internally as I realized that there was a single, bright candle in the middle of the chocolate cake.

I glared at Edward while several other waitresses and waiters stood around me singing happy birthday. You could probably fry an egg on my face it was burning so fiercely. As I blew out my candle, a few people from surrounding tables wished me a happy birthday, and I did my best to hide my grimace as I accepted their encouragements.

"Can I have some?" Edward dared to ask as I dove into my chocolate brownie cake.

"No," I grunted while I chewed on a very large piece. "I'm still mad at you."

"Fine," Edward managed through his chuckles. "Here," He tossed a small package on a table.

It was obvious that it was a book by the shape of the brown paper wrapped around it. "I didn't want to wrap it in special birthday wrapping paper," he chuckled. "I wasn't going to push my luck."

I grabbed the present and ran my fingers across it. "Edward, you shouldn't have gotten me anything. This dinner was supposed to be my birthday present."

"I thought I could slip it in," he whispered.

I carefully ripped the brown paper and confirmed my suspicions. It was a book, Wuthering Heights actually. "Edward!" I gasped. "This is a first edition!"

"Happy Birthday," he smiled.

"You are such an idiot!" I whispered. "Why did you get this?"

Edward's smile dropped. "Because I wanted to do something nice for you. Bella just accept the gift."

"But this must have cost you a fortune!" I shook my head as I looked at the book. It was in near perfect condition, and I bet it had the old book smell to it. How could he spend so much money on me, and then dinner too?!

"Bella…" I didn't look up. "Bella…" He spoke more sternly, and I had no choice but to look at him. "Do you like it?" He asked when our eyes finally met.

"That is not the point," I spoke through my teeth.

He cut me off, "Do you like it?"

"I love it," I grumbled.

"Then just take it."

We didn't stay there much longer. I ended up giving Edward a few bites from my cake, and I really was in awe with the present he gave me. It was almost 8 as we walked up to the door of my apartment.

"So what are we going to do for the rest of the night?" I asked at I grabbed my key from my purse.

"I don't know," Edward shrugged. "Open the door so we can find out."

"Jeez you are pushy," I slid the key into the door. As I opened the door I noticed how dark it was. That's weird - I always kept a light on.

"SURPRISE!!"

I screamed as I heard voices yell at me from every corner, the light flickering and distorting my vision. I jumped back into Edward and wrapped my arms around him, hiding my face in his chest.

Laughter exploded as Edward rubbed his hand on my head. I felt him shake, and realized he was laughing too!

"Bella," I heard him say, "It's ok, look."

I turned around and was shocked. My apartment had been completely transformed so that balloons and streamers claimed the ceiling while confetti marked the floor. I instantly noticed my friends standing in the walkway; Emmett, Rose, Alice, and Jasper. I had to focus to see who the other people were. I let out a squeal of delight as I saw Angela and her boyfriend Ben who I met when we were in college together. The three of us were very good friends. Next to them stood Carlisle and Esme, a warm welcoming smile on both their faces. As I shifted my eyes I saw Charlie standing there, with his hands in his pockets and an awkward smile on his face as he gave me a nod of hello. But as I saw my mom standing in between Phil and Charlie, I let out a full on scream and ran over to give her a hug.

My mom was a prettier, older version of me. While I was the shy, quiet, awkward type (very much like my dad) she was outgoing, but could be very flaky.

"Mom," I leaned back, but still held onto her. "What are you doing here?" She moved out to Florida with Phil soon after I moved out.

"It is my baby's birthday," she beamed. "I didn't want to miss the party."

I leaned over to Charlie and gave him a hug too. He still lived in Forks, which was just a few hours drive to Seattle, so I saw him every few months nevertheless. I quickly gave Phil, Carlisle, and Esme a hug before I tackled Angela.

She and Ben had moved to Port Angeles which was just an hour's drive a way, but I still didn't see her as much as I would like. Ben was a few inches shorter then Angela, but his mousy features matched well with her quiet blond ones.

"What?" was all I could say before I gave everyone of my friends a hug. When I reached Jasper all I could say was "But you are supposed to be out of town."

Jasper laughed as he pulled me into a hug. "I've been here since Tuesday! Do you know hard it is to hide from you?"

"Wait," I pulled away to look at my friends, "You guys have work though."

Rose cocked her head to the side, an amused smile on her face. "Bella do you really think we have all been busy for the past two weeks and were so busy that we would miss your birthday."

"A girl can dream," I mumbled. "So the whole being busy thing was a lie?"

Alice wrapped her little arm around my waist while Emmett threw his over my shoulder.

"Bella," Emmett started in his booming voice, "You can be so thick sometimes."

"We had to avoid you," Alice pleaded, "if we wanted to trick you."

I shook my head, a huge smile on my face. "You guys are all crazy."

Everyone seemed to congregate and mingle in the sitting room and dining room. My mom was surprised when she saw who my roommate was. I never told my parents about Edward back in high school, so this was the first time that they had heard of him; well for Renee this was the first time, but Charlie of course had heard of him and of his parents. Forks was a very small town.

Angela had taken me aside in the kitchen, a glass of wine in both of our hands. "Bella, you're living with Edward Masen?" Her eyes were wide with shock. "Why didn't you ever call me?"

I quickly explained to her Edward's story, skimming over the smaller issues as I gathered a bunch of plates for the very large vanilla cake outside.

"I can't believe that you let him live here with you!" Angela took a sip from her wine. "You are just too good of a person."

I sighed, tired of hearing this. "Look he was really sorry when he apologized, and we have worked things out. I forgot how well we got along back in high school, and now we can be friends without the peer pressure from stupid high school."

Angela looked at me with sad eyes; I could tell she was thinking about how I had gone to her the day after the party. "I can tell he has changed," she consented.

"He really is a great guy," I smiled. "Be nice to him, give him a chance."

"If he even knows who I am," she snorted.

As it turns out Edward knew exactly who Angela was. He recalled all the classes they had in high school, and even remembered her being one of the most genuine people he knew from back in high school. After that she pretty much forgave him of all previous wrongs. It's funny how high school insecurities seem to stick with us, even years later.

The guys had drifted their way to the living room to turn on the TV to see the score of some game that was playing. The girls and I hung back in the sitting room, giggling whenever the guys would scream out in anger.

My mom and Angela both asked about the piano to which I informed them was Edward's, and that is what he does for a living. When it was time for cake, my mom then insisted that Edward play while everyone sang. This was probably the part I hate most about birthdays. What are you supposed to do when everyone sings to you? I hate standing there with everyone focused on me.

Both my parents were staying at a hotel. Charlie was leaving tomorrow after we go out for breakfast. My mom, I was thrilled to hear, was staying for another week, while Phil headed home; a week that went all too quickly for my taste.

Rose made sure that I did not need to do a thing for work, so I could spend all my time with my mom. Renee really was my best friend. Before Phil, and before I moved to Forks, it felt like I was more the parent than anything else. She would easily forget things, and thus had helped me develop my patience.

But now that I was an adult, I seemed to get along better with my mom. She would come over in the morning to have breakfast with Edward and me. Every morning she would request Edward play her some of her favorite classical music peices, to which he was all too happy to do. I was really surprised at how well they got along.

Edward played Renee some of _his_ songs, telling her that Friendship Part 1 was a song about me. On one of the lunches that Renee and I went out for, I explained Edward's story, minus the part about the party. If I didn't know any better I would say she was developing a crush on him. Really, she couldn't stop talking about how hot Edward was, to which I would only roll my eyes.

When the day she had to leave rolled around I found myself falling into a slump. I visited my mom about two times a year, but it never really seemed to be enough. I would try to convince her to move out to Seattle, but she reminded me how much she hated the cold and rain. Then she would try to coax me to go out and live in Florida, but I just did not like the heat.

So here we were, at the entrance of my apartment (my mom was adamant that she go to the airport by herself, she really hated public goodbyes.) Edward pulled my mom in a hug saying goodbye, and once he let go of her I swear I saw her drool a little. Edward was nice enough to let my mom and I have our moment to say our farewells.

"I'm going to miss you baby girl," my mom whispered in my ear as I held onto her, feeling like a little five year old girl again, needing her mommy.

"I'm going to miss you too," I sniffed. I felt the tears start to stream down my face - this happened every time we said goodbye.

My mom pulled away a little and looked over my face. "This is the first time I'm leaving you feeling like you are in capable hands."

"What?" I wiped the moisture off my eyes.

"Edward, dear," she spoke carefully as if it was the most obvious thing.

"What do you mean?"

"He is going to take care of you," I felt my mouth open a little, unsure of what to say. My mom went on, "You don't see it yet do you?" my mom smiled and stroked my face. "You've changed so much already."

"Mom…"

"You like him don't you dear?"

I felt like a fish; I kept opening and closing my mouth. "No, I don't" I managed to say.

Renee gave me a small knowing smile and kissed my forehead, "Whatever you say. I love you, and I'll miss you."

I watched as my mom entered the elevator, the door closing taking her away from me. Although I was doing pretty well living on my own, away from my parents, it still hurt when I would see them and then have to say goodbye again. It would make me think of more peaceful days, when everything was made better by a single kiss or hug.

I slid to the floor, brought my knees up to my chest, my head on my knees after I closed the door. I didn't sob in hysterics, but the tears flowed freely none the less. I felt a strong arm wrap around me, and I allowed myself cry into his chest.

My mom was right; I had changed since taking Edward in. I thought I was the one doing the helping, but it seemed that Edward was helping me just as much as I did him. Slowly, he was finally helping me get over my old high school insecurities, and not just those, but all of my vulnerabilities.

As for the other thing my mom said… well I just don't know what would make her think that.

* * *

OWWW, I got a little fluffy there. Haha, Oh how I like to mess with them. Shout out to Raven Alice, who gave me the Wuthering Heights idea. I would have done the signed copy, but he still not rolling in the money yet. Haha

**So the next chapter is called**, "3 out of 3" And some exciting news (at least it is to me) the first half will be written in Edwards POV. Fill you in on some insight there.

sorry if i am forgetting anything, i'm very sleepy at the moment. haha

As always I hoped you guys enjoyed :)


	10. 3 for 3

**Hey guys!! So I feel horrible that I have not e-mailed you guys back on your reviews, I really do appreciate them! But I am back in school, and I am trying to pump out these chapters for ya. I really do what to say thank you to every person who reads and reviews. So thank you guys.**

**I am also psyched that it seems like you all get my humor. There are many times in the day when I say something and people around me just look at me and say "_Seriously Jac, what is up with your humor_?" but poo on them b/c you guys get it, and you all are the ones who matter!! :)**

**As you can see this chapter is on the longer side, well Edward thinks a lot, and I have to be careful how I word things so, yep.**

**ONE person guessed something pretty close to where this is going ish, they know who they are. PROPS to you.**

**Thanks to my two awesome Betas Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter. you two make my crappy spelling and gramar better, and i thank you. haha OH and my sister joined the ranks of Beta, so you could say i have three Betas. So yay!**

**And really, you all are more then amazing, and I want to say thank you so much for reading my little story here.**

**Well lets get on with it!!**

**I do not own Twilight.**

* * *

Chapter 9- 3 for 3

Edward's POV

Renee was a very nice woman. I can remember Bella talking about her back in high school, and saw how much pain she was in being away from her. And now, as I gave Renee one last hug goodbye, I could see distress in Bella's face while she watched her mother. I excused myself to go to the kitchen, but my departure seemed to go unnoticed.

I couldn't hear what they were saying, just muffled whispers mixed with the occasional sob. It wasn't until I got into the kitchen that I realized there wasn't really anything I needed to do in here. I remembered how Bella always made herself tea if she was stressed out, and decided to boil some water in case she wanted some once her mom was gone.

With Renee here this past week, it has be very interesting. I decided to postpone work some so that I could spend some time with her and Bella. I was fascinated with how Bella and her mother interacted; they were more like close friends rather then mother and daughter. But as much as enjoyed watching them interact, I also understood how important it was that Bella have some time alone with her mother – so I tried to give them the space they needed.

Surprisingly, I realized that being around Renee and Bella this past week had me thinking about my parents. I didn't mind thinking about them, it had been six years, but what hurt the most was never getting a chance to say goodbye. If I had to get cheated out of time with my parents, I understood that. But why did I have to get cheated out of saying goodbye to them? Well, that is a whole different subject all together; one that I did not want to think about just now.

Instead I thought about what makes me happy - my new friends. They were all so great. Although Jasper and I had lost touch with each other this past year, I knew that once I got over my issues, we would be ok.

My issues. I hated to think back to those first hours, those first days – at first I didn't think I had it in me to get through the day. I know that sounds dramatic, but it was true. I wasn't sure how to ask Jasper to go with me to get my box back, and then he left right as Lauren's threats started to become more serious. I really felt like there was no solution.

But the night Bella sat me down, and talked to me… she said the same thing that Jasper told me in essence, but the way she said it was what made things click. The realization that Lauren was _not_ my other half and that I _could_ live without her made me want to laugh with hysterics. I had always known this, even while we dated, and I wasted so many years on her.

But Bella offered well not really offered so much as invited herself to go with me. She took time off work, time away from her life and friends so that she could help me, _me_! Me out of all people, me, the person who least deserved her kindness. But she not only accepted my apology, but also was willing to be my friend. We could finally be the kind of friends we should have been in high school.

High school … it was supposed to be the time of your life, and probably would have been, but for what I did to Bella… I still felt sick whenever I think about that night, the night after, the next day at school, and every day that after that I didn't apologize. But this was my time to redeem myself and fix any damage that I might have done.

Bella was an unexpected friend, but probably the one that I wanted and would cherish the most. Alice, Rose, and Emmett were all great as well, but Bella was something else entirely. For the last couple of weeks while trying to hide from Bella, I had been spending more time with all of them, and come to really appreciate their friendship.

Alice was truly like the little sister I never had. We got on amazingly well with each other, and I was beyond thrilled that her and Jasper's relationship was going so well.

Rose was a force to be reckoned with. She never hid her feelings, and would call me out whenever I was being an idiot or an "emotional pain in the ass" as she called me. But I do believe I won her over when I asked her to fix my car; she was impressed that didn't mind asking a girl for help.

Emmett … I couldn't seem to find the words … he was just … Emmett. He was a hilarious, "fun loving" person who saw the bright side to everything. I could tell he was a loyal friend, just by the way he spoke about Bella as if she was his own family; it made me very thankful to call him a friend as well.

The week before, the night of Bella's birthday, was probably the most fun that I had in a very long time; and not just the party, but going to dinner with Bella as well. I really wanted to do something for her, and when her birthday rolled around, I felt like it was perfect timing.

At first I could tell that she was angry about where I took her, but as the dinner went on it seemed as if she was able to let go and enjoy herself. When I asked Bella a couple days later she told me she had a great time, and thanked me and then promptly made me promise to never do that again.

I would have to say that dancing with Bella was the most enjoyable part of that night for me; even with the bruise on my big toe that was just starting to fade. But I loved the way that she laughed when I twirled her, or spun her away and back to me. But when the band started to play that slow song, I don't know what came over me, and was surprised when my body seemed to act on its own. What probably stunned me more, though, was how Bella melted right into me.

I felt odd while I danced with her, and I could not place the feeling that made its presence known in my chest. I felt heavier, but at the same time felt like nothing could hold me down. I still felt that feeling in my chest when I thought about Bella's large brown eyes gazing up at me as we danced.

I was pulled from my thoughts when I heard the door close followed by a heavy sigh. I poked my head around the corner, but even though I could hear her quiet cries, I couldn't see her. I stepped closer and found her sitting on the floor, her knees to her chest, and her face buried in her arms.

As quietly as I could, I made my way to her side, and sat down with my arm around her, guiding her to cry into my chest. With each tear I felt dampen my shirt, it felt like my heart was breaking for her. I was astonished to realize how much her pain affected me, but I didn't give myself the time to dwell upon that; Bella needed me now, just like I had needed her.

I let her cry for some time before her sobs died down, and I heard her breathing even out. I looked down and saw her head roll to the side – a sign that she was a sleep. Carefully I grabbed her legs with my right hand, and cradled her body with my left. I was thankful that the door to her room was open so I would not have to try and balance her with my arm and knee. I laid her on her bed, moving the sheets aside. I took off her shoes, and left her clothes on, just a pair of jeans and a black top, comfortable enough to sleep in.

As I pulled away, I realized that I felt that pain in my chest again when I saw her tear stained face. I leaned down beside her bed to watch her, and that same strange feeling that I had when I danced with her overtook me again. Gently, I reached over to tuck a lock of her hair behind her ear. She took a deep breath, and I froze, fearing that I'd disturbed her, but when her breathing resumed its even pace, I relaxed.

I would have to figure out what this strange feel is later, for right now I needed to focus on being there for Bella- on being her friend. Quietly I closed the door behind and headed to my room.

I normally awoke before Bella did, but she went to bed much earlier than normal last night. It made sense then to see her sitting on the couch, already typing away the next morning. I could always tell the mood of the story she was writing just by looking at her face. So I don't think she realized how much her expressions change and give her away as she writes, but at the moment she had a small smile on her face, as if she was in on some inside joke.

I didn't want to disturb her; she looked so "in the zone," so I just sat next to her. She moved her head a little as if to face me, but kept her gaze on the screen. After a few seconds of feverish writing she looked at me giving me the normal warm smile she always gave me.

"Morning," her voice was lower, cautious; probably wondering if I was going to mention her crying.

"Good morning," I smiled back.

Bella looked down at her lap as a fresh shade of pink took over her cheeks. This always made me smile; I have learned to tell which blush was which. At the moment she was embarrassed.

"Thanks…" she started awkwardly, "For last night and…"

I cut her off before she could say any more. "Bella, you have nothing to be sorry for. I'm your friend, I will be here for you." The sides of her mouth lifted and she let out a quiet little laugh. "What?" I asked.

Bella looked up at me, her chocolate eyes glinting with humor. "Right before my mom left she said that this was the first time she felt like she was leaving me in good hands." Bella shrugged as if his was no big deal. "I didn't think I would get an example of what she was saying so soon."

Renee felt that I was capable of protecting her? I had not realized it, but I suppose it was true. All this time I felt like Bella was my own personal angel. She really had been too good to me. I would never thought to expect this kind of kindness from any person, and then to have Bella Swan, the one girl whose life I ruined in high school, be the one to take care of me! It was almost too much. I felt like God sent me to my own personal hell. I was in dire need of help, and I had to ask the one person I needed to redeem myself to for help. It was too much. But despite all that I thought I knew, all that I expected, she helped me. And I helped her last night; even though there was little I could offer, I still tried to help.

Bella blushed again while giving a slightly nervous laugh; she was about to change the subject. "So how did I end up in bed?"

Hmm, I wonder how much this would make her blush? Crimson, no it was not that embarrassing, but to Bella maybe it was. "I carried you."

Right on cue, her face lit up. "But I was asleep," she gasped. "That is like dead weight. How did you carry me?"

I rolled my eyes, "Really Bella, you hardly weigh anything. You are tiny."

Her brows pulled together while she bit her lip, debating what I just said. "Well next time I prefer to be awake, so that I can see how much pain you are in while carrying me."

I raised my eyebrow, "Next time?"

"Trust me," she laughed. "There will be a next time. I don't want to count how many times Emmett and Jasper had to carry me because I hurt myself."

I didn't like the idea of Bella hurting herself, but I had a perfect demonstration of her coordination when we played laser tag. Although at the time I had used it to my advantage and I found it very entertaining, I have also seen her trip on her own feet in the apartment and I had come to believe that this could be classified as a disability.

"You're probably right," I laughed.

"Going to the gym?" Bella asked as she took in my appearance. I had on my black basketball shorts, which had a white stripe on the side, with a matching black muscle shirt.

"Yeah I'm going with Jasper,"

"Aw, not going with Emmett?" she teased, a fake pout on her face.

I glowered as I thought back to the one time I went to the gym with Emmett. I should have known just by looking at him that he would be hard to keep up with. I do just fine on my own, but that guy was just too unreal. I had come home that night unable to lift my arms. I don't think I have ever seen Bella laugh as much as she did that night.

"No," I mumbled, but was drowned out when Bella's cell started ringing.

She looked down and smiled when she saw the caller ID. "Hi Alice." There was a pause as Alice spoke. "No, just writing, hanging out with Edward," Bella looked at me and gave me a friendly smile while Alice continued to speak. "No, he is going to the gym with Jasper. Didn't Jasper tell you?" Bella looked off to the ground as a slightly worried look came on her face. "Huh, that is weird. He is probably busy with work…" Alice must have cut her off. Bella nodded her head as she listened. "Well you don't think he is cheating, I mean its Jasper, and he wouldn't do that."

What, Jasper _cheating_? No, I know my best friend and he would never do that. What was Alice saying?

"Well it's good that you don't think he is cheating, but it is weird that he is going off to places and not telling you… Alice I'm sure he has his reasons for not wanting to talk to you about it." A soft smile spread to her face, "Of course I will go shopping with you…" Alice must have cut her off again. "I don't complain every time…" Bella looked a little annoyed, but I could still see the humor in her eyes. "Well maybe I just miss my best friend, and I know you need to be cheered up so I am going willingly."

A little color left her face. "Ok, well, let's not get carried away Alice… That is not fair!" Bella had a panicked look on her face. "Fine," she took a defeated breath. "Alright, one hour, got it. Yeah, yeah, bye." Bella closed her eyes and rested her head on the back of the couch; she looked tired.

"What's up?" I asked quietly.

She jumped when I asked, "Sorry," she breathed. "Nothing really, but Jasper seems to be out of touch lately, not telling her where he's going. But nothing to make her really suspicious; she's just kind of worried."

"I know Jasper," I felt my face stiffen in thought, "And he would not be unfaithful. There must be a reason why he's acting like that."

"That's what I said," she agreed with a small sad smile.

"Going shopping with Alice then?" I tried to change the subject.

What little color her face had regained left her, "Yep," she sounded as if she was about to meet her death.

I couldn't help but laugh. "What did you agree to? The look on your face didn't make it seem too pretty."

"All I offered her was to go shopping," she shook her head, "And then she takes advantage of the fact that I am trying to make her feel better and has me agree to get a complete new fall wardrobe!" Bella threw her hands up in the air. "She is probably going to keep me till the people kick us out of the store… it wouldn't be the first time."

"How about this," I offered. "You and I can go to the movies tonight; it gives Alice a time limit."

"Sounds good!"

I left Bella getting ready for her shopping trip, and we agreed to meet back at the apartment at 6 so we could catch a movie at 8. Jasper and I had already been working out for an hour on the weight lifting machines so we couldn't actually get a chance to talk. The whole time though, I did notice that Jasper wasn't really listening to anything I was saying.

After using the machines we headed over to the treadmill. Fifteen minuets went by, and Jasper had yet to even look at me. I got sick of it.

"Jasper, what's up with you man?"

Jasper looked shocked that I called him out; then looked guilty as he hung his head. "I haven't been much company have I? Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," I shook my head. "But something is up, what is it?"

"I…" he let out an exhausted breath still not looking at me.

"Look, if you don't want to talk about it that's fine, but it is freaking Alice out." Jasper's head snapped up, he even stumbled a bit and I thought he was about to slip on the treadmill. That would have been fun to see.

"What?!" he demanded, "What's wrong with Alice? Did she say something to you? Is she ok?"

I would have laughed if Jasper weren't freaking out so uncharacteristically. "Look, she called Bella this morning and it sounds like Alice is up to something. I heard them mention something about you cheating…"

"What?" Jasper looked at me, pain written in his eyes. "How could she think that?"

"I never said she thought that. It sounded like she had dismissed that idea," Jasper let out a heavy breath of relief. "But Jasper, what is going on with you?"

Jasper looked up at me, his cheeks turning pink and a sly smile played his face. "I'm going to ask her to marry me."

Now I was the one who almost fell down. I had to step off my treadmill just so I could focus on what he just said. "You're going to… you going to what?"

"I'm going to ask her to marry me," he spoke with more confidence, his smile growing.

"That's great! That is more than great, that is…" I felt my mouth hang open - I was at a loss for words.

"I know," The large smile on Jasper's face didn't seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. "I have the ring, I'm just trying to get everything set up."

"Congratulations man!"

"She hasn't said yes yet," his smile fading slightly.

"But she will; I mean the two of you just work." There was really no other way to describe how Jasper and Alice were together; they worked.

"Thanks,"

We were interrupted when two girls walked up to us. They could not have been any older then 21, but they had their eyes set on Jasper and I. Their appearance was offensive in a word, and it was clear they had no intention of working out based on the amount of makeup caked on their faces. They appeared to be sisters or twins and were nearly identical, right down to their fake hair color and fake breasts. The fake red head had her eye on me, while the one with fake black hair seemed to stake her claim on Jasper.

I glanced over at Jasper, and the disgusted look on his face told me he too knew what was coming.

"Hi," spoke the red haired one, her voice was breathy and sounded as if she was trying to make it sound sexy. "I'm Vivian."

"And I'm Vanessa," the black haired one's nasal voice nearly screeched, "We're twins." They both began to giggle as if it was the funniest thing they ever heard.

I looked down at them, gave them a polite, yet strained, smile. "Hello." I hoped that they could tell I wasn't interested. But when Vivian grabbed the handle to my treadmill, and looked over my body, I knew my hopes were about to be crushed.

The other one had gone over to Jasper and was doing the same thing as her sister, only she actually reached up and stroked Jasper on the chest, "What's your name?" she whispered, still not hiding her nasally voice.

Jasper looked a little panicked when he realized exactly how close she was. "I have a girlfriend," he blurted out. "And I love her."

Smooth Jazz, real smooth.

"Oh," she sounded disappointed.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" Vivian asked, but the look on her face told me my answer probably wouldn't matter much.

"Err, yes… I do," I stuttered. "I…err… love her."

"Hmm that's a shame," she didn't look too disheartened. "Do you think she would mind if she shared. My sister and I share everything."

I looked over at her sister and saw her trying to climb up the treadmill to stand with Jasper. "I think I'm done working out today," I hit the stop button and jumped off, making a b-line to the men's locker room; I didn't even look to see if Jasper was behind me. But what was it they say about out running a bear? You don't need to out run the bear, just your friend. Yeah, I didn't need to out run the skank, just Jasper.

I was changing out of my shirt when I felt someone punch my shoulder. I turned and saw a very angry looking Jasper glaring at me. "What, you just leave me?"

"You looked like you could handle it," I tried not to laugh.

"Jackass," he mumbled. "You're the single one! You should be the one dealing with that kind of crap."

"Just because I'm single, does not mean I want to deal with those kinds of girls." I shook my head as I ruffled my hair, airing it out.

"So what kind of girls would you want to deal with?" Jasper looked cautious.

"I don't know," I sighed. "I mean, she would have to have this spark about her, something that just lights up the room. I would want her to be smart so I can actually hold a decent conversation with her," I laughed dryly, "I don't know how I survived so many years with Lauren."

"You had me to call," shrugged Jasper.

I nodded in agreement and continued my description. "Probably someone who reads a lot, you know someone who can introduce me to new kinds of books. Someone who would understand my music, and help encourage me, support me, and be there to kick my ass into shape when I am being an idiot." I laughed.

Jasper was quiet for a bit as he thought about what I said. "Would you want someone to forgive and understand you when you can hardly understand yourself?"

"Yeah,"

"Someone who is not only your love, but your friend too?"

"Yeah!"

"Someone who can stand her own, and help deflate that ego of yours?"

"That is exactly who I want Jazz," I stood up with excitement, did he know someone who could have all these qualities?

"It sounds like that someone is Bella," he said simply while grabbing his workout bag.

Shock, yes shock is the right word to describe what I was feeling. "Bella?" I asked.

"Look man," Jasper turned to me, "Alice mentioned something last week after Bella's birthday. She said something about the way you two are with each other. I don't know… but is sounds like the person you are describing is Bella."

"She is my roommate, my friend!" How could he think that I liked Bella? Sure she had many great qualities about her, and whoever ends up with her, will be more then lucky to have her. But that is the problem; she would need someone worthy of her, someone to love her without fault, be there, and protect her. He would need to see the true beauty of her heart, mind, and soul; and not just the obvious beauty of her exterior.

And what am I? I am nothing more then a leach that tries to claim the title of friend. I hurt her, and have yet to redeem myself. It doesn't matter how many times she accepts my apology - we will be no where near equal until I somehow, someway I redeem myself; and even after that moment of which I can only dream of happening, I would still be nowhere near the man worthy of her love. She is Bella, my own personal angel. How could I even consider myself her match?

"It can't happen Jasper," my voice was low, and hoarse.

"Please don't get all melodramatic on me," I glanced at him to see him giving me a knowing stare. "Come one, I have known you since we were in dippers, I know how you think."

"Well if you know what I'm thinking, then you know I'm right," I spat. "I can't even let my mind go there."

"Look, you have made some mistakes," reasoned Jasper, "But we all do. You have to get over what happened - you can't carry that with you for the rest of your life."

I shook my head not listening to what he said. "Did you recognize her? Or did you not realize it was her until I got here?"

Jasper let out a humorless laugh, "Are you kidding me? I knew who she was the moment I first met her." Jasper sat down on the bench, I followed. "I have never been more ashamed of myself than that day."

"You?" I huffed, "What did _you_ do that day?"

"Nothing!" his voiced echoed in the locker room, "Even though I had no idea what was going on, I knew that she was in trouble, and I should have jumped in and tried to help." Jasper hung his head. "But instead I just watched, too scared by my own stupid high school insecurities." Jasper looked me in the eye and I could see a pain that almost match my own, "You were not the only one who failed to rise to the occasion."

"Does she know that you were there?"

Jasper slammed his head into the locker behind him and closed his eyes. "No, no one knows; not even Alice. I've been too scared to tell them. I always made a point of not telling Bella exactly where I was from, so that way she wouldn't ask any kinds of questions that might have given me away." He brought his head to face me and opened his eyes, "At least your dark deeds are all known."

"Hey, she forgave me," I shrugged, "And I'm the one who threw her under the bus - she would forgive you in a heartbeat."

"Yeah," he sighed, "I can only hope to be so lucky."

We were quiet for a few minuets before I broke the silence. "If you always knew it was her, then why didn't you tell me? You out of all people knew how I felt about that day. I would have been on her door step the next hour."

"Another thing to which I need to apologize for," Jasper looked guilty as he spoke. "You and Lauren were already going through some issues, and I always knew that she didn't like me. I was afraid that if I told you I knew, you would have been here in the next hour as you said, and I didn't want to add any fuel to the fire. Plus if I were to call you, I would've had to explain to everyone how I knew you and Bella, and I would have to tell Alice. We were just starting to date and I didn't want her to know that part of me. I'm sorry."

I looked at my pleading friend, and as much as I should have been angry about his selfishness, but I couldn't. I could understand where he was coming from. "It's alright," I smiled. "Let's get out of here, I'm meeting Bella, or saving her from your future wife," I nudged Jasper, "and we're going to the movies."

A goofy grin made its way onto Jasper's face, "Future wife…I like the sound of that."

"When is it going to happen?"

"Soon; I need to work out a few things, but I want a ring on that finger of hers as soon as possible." Jasper looked as me from the corner of his eyes and started to wiggle his eyebrows suggestively, "So you're going to the movies with Bella?"

I could feel my face drop, "Friend, Jasper. All I can offer Bella right now is to be her friend."

Almost a week went by; it was Friday morning and Bella and I were in the middle of lunch when we heard the stampede. It sounded like something crashed into the door causing both Bella and I to jump. Bella looked at me with questioning eyes, and I shrugged back in response. I stood up to see what caused the noise, but stopped in my tracks when the door burst open with the onslaught of our friends.

Rosalie and Jasper looked like they were in a heated argument, while Alice and Emmett followed them with amused expressions. Occasionally Alice would lean over to Emmett and whisper something that sounded like, "This is your fault."

Both Rose and Jasper held a peace of paper in their hands arguing about "whose was better." They all stood in the sitting room yelling back and forth at each other. When poor Bella walked into the room, Jasper and Rose practically attacked her, thrusting the paper in her face.

"Wait, stop!" yelled Bella causing everyone in the room to freeze. "What the hell is going on? And damn it, stop shoving those things in my face; you're going to give me a paper cut."

"I found your next date!" Rose sounded breathless, "He is really great!"

"No," interrupted Jasper, "_I_ found your next date."

"Do you really want to go through this again?" Rose placed her hands on her hips and took a stance ready to continue on the fight. "She is _my_ client, and I get to choose who she dates first."

"But my guy leaves on Sunday,"

"So does my guy,"

"But my guy wants to go out with her!"

"So does my guy!"

"You guys," Bella waved her hands around, "I am missing a few things here."

"Well yesterday Jasper was hanging out with Emmett at the office," Alice spoke up from her perch on the arm of one of the chairs. "And he was looking through the names of guys you could date and found someone. They couldn't get a hold of Rose so Emmett," Alice threw Emmett an accusatory smirk, "decided that he would just schedule the date for tonight."

"But the reason why you guys couldn't get a hold of me was because I found the guy I want you to go out with and you are supposed to go out with him tonight." Rose glared at Jasper and Emmett.

"But both of our guys are leaving Sunday," Jasper concluded with a huff.

Bell looked at both of her friends, "Why can't I go out with one tonight, then the next tomorrow?"

Her friends looked at her with blank stares, "We thought you would only go out with one of them because it was such short notice," Emmett defended.

"You could have just asked me," Bella shrugged, "you didn't have to go screaming at each other."

"Yes!" Rose cheered, "My guy is tonight then."

"What, why?" Jasper pouted.

"Because your guy doesn't have a life," Rose folded her arms, ending the discussion.

"Who are they?" Bella asked sounding a little worried.

"Not now," Rose snapped, "Alice, come on, we have to get her ready."

Alice jumped up from her spot and grabbed Bella's hand, dragging her off to her room. Bella looked at me and mouthed "save me."

I just stood there, mouth open, not quite sure what was going on. I looked over at Emmett who just shrugged and headed to the living room. Jasper gave an annoyed sigh, "Well I guess I have to go reschedule. Rose is right; he probably has nothing planed for tomorrow night."

I found Emmett sitting on the couch flipping through channels on the TV. "So who is the guy that Rose picked?" I asked while sitting down on the couch next to him.

"His name is Tyler Crowley, he races cars and is supposed to be this big hot-shot of a guy," Emmett found a football game playing on the TV and left the channel there.

"Car racing?" I raised one eyebrow; I tried to picture Bella with one of those NASCAR types, it made me laugh.

"Well you know Rose and her cars," Emmett rolled his eyes; "She's wanted to meet him for forever."

For the next couple of hours Jasper, Emmett, and I just hung around watching the game. I would hear the occasional frustrated yell coming from Bella's room and could only imagine what they were doing to her. It was not until around 8 o'clock when the doorbell rang.

I stood up to go answer it, but was cut off when Rose ran from Bella's bedroom to the front door, screaming "I'll get it!"

"Jealous Emmett?" Jasper snickered as we all stood up.

"Nah, I've seen a picture of him; skinny little thing. Rose likes them big," Emmett gave a cocky smirk. "And big I am."

I shook my head while laughing, only to be interrupted, "What is so dang funny here?"

I turned to see who the owner of the southern accented voice was, and had to suppress a laugh. Tyler looked to be about my height, but appeared to be half of my muscle mass. He had dark blond hair that was slicked back with so much oil that I now understood why we were in the middle of an oil crisis. However it was his outfit that made me bite my tongue.

He wore all leather, starting with a bright red leather jacket with blue patches over the shoulder. As he walked over to us, I heard an annoying squeaking sound that was being caused by the white leather pants that he wore, or maybe it was being caused by his matching bright red shoes.

None of us spoke, we couldn't speak; we didn't want to ruin the moment of all of us taking him in. Yep, I just saw the tooth pick that he had in between his lips; this was a moment no one wanted to ruin, however we had to face the inevitable when Alice's voice rang out.

"Alright, she is ready! Where is this guy?" Alice stopped in her tracts when she saw Tyler. Her eyes grew wide, and her mouth dropped, a look of horror over took her face. Japer walked over and wrapped his arm around Alice, bringing her out of her daze.

We were all brought out of our daze when Bella stepped out of her room. She had on a black dress up shorts that went to about mid thigh, with a matching black top, which was loose around her torso, yet clung to her waist. She had on bright yellow pumps that drew attention to her long legs, making them look even longer.

She was beautiful. I was instantly reminded of what I thought about when I spoke to Jasper last week. She deserved so much more than I could offer.

"Well howt dowgy!" exclaimed Tyler, "You'z looken mighty fine."

Bella raised her eyebrows in confusion. "Are you Tyler?"

"That I am Sweets," Tyler offered with a wink, "Now I thinks we should get out of here. I'm a fast guy, and I want to speed this date up!" Tyler turned on his heal and marched out of the room.

Bella glared at Rose and mouthed, "You're dead," before following with a very glum expression. Once the door closed Emmett and Jasper broke out in laughter.

"Did you see what that guy was wearing?" gasped Emmett.

"How could you not?" Alice shook her head still in horror. "Think about how many cows died for that outfit." She placed her hands over her eyes, "Why would anyone wear that?"

"He was such a disappointment," Rose hung her head.

"Did you hear him?" Jasper gasped, "Who says 'howt dowgy'?"

"Sorry Rose," I laughed, "But I think you have lost this bet."

"Yes, I'm still in the race!" Emmett yelled.

We decided to watch a movie until Bella came in from the date - everyone wanted to know what Speedy Tyler was like. I felt bad for her; I could only imagine what the conversation would be going like, or where he took her for dinner. I know Bella is a strong girl and she can take care of herself, which means I can thoroughly enjoy the torture that he is putting her through.

It was less then an hour into the movie when Rose's cell started ringing. I paused the movie and leaned back. I was sitting on the floor leaning against the couch that had Emmett, Rose, and Alice while Jasper sat next to me on the floor in between Alice's legs.

"It's Bella," Rose opened her phone, "Hey Bella, what's up?" a moment went by, "Wait, wait, Bella hold on; let me put you on speaker phone." Rose looked at her cell and pushed the button on the side. "Ok, start over."

"I don't have time to start over," Bella panted. "I told him I needed to use the restroom, and he said 'remember girly, we eat fast, we pee fast!'" Bella imitated his accent perfectly.

Emmett doubled over laughing, "I have got to start saying that!"

"Shut up Emmett," Bella hissed, "You guys, he took me to a really tacky Barbeque restaurant, and ordered my food without even asking me what I want, because 'who can say no to wings smothered in sauce?'"

"Bella, you know that Barbeque sauce makes you sick," giggled Alice.

"Yeah, well I don't have to worry about that," grumbled Bella, "He ate them so quickly that there wasn't any thing left for me."

"Eat fast, pee fast!" laughed Emmett.

"Rose, he picked his nose!" growled Bella, "You owe me."

"I'm sorry," Rose shoved her fist in her mouth to stop her from laughing.

"What time will you be coming home?" asked Jasper.

"Hour half the most," sighed Bella, "At least this date was fast, but it feels like forever."

"We will have ice cream waiting for you," I offered.

"Thanks, look I better go; I don't want him to come looking for me, bye" then Bella was gone.

Almost exactly a half hour went by before we heard someone trying to open the lock. We all looked at each other for a second before running to the front door. I was the first one there and was able to claim the peephole; the others all smothered their ear to the door desperate to hear what was going on.

I could see both of their profiles while they faced each other. Bella looked uncomfortable and was not even really looking at Tyler's eyes. Instead she was looking at his chin, which I could see had a large smear of Barbeque sauce. Tyler however, kept his gaze on Bella's cleavage. I felt a different type of pressure in my chest – something similar to what I felt when Mike kissed her, or when that guy from the bookstore was hitting on her. It must have been my protective nature coming out; I don't want anyone using my friend.

"You seem like a girl who can keep pace with me," Tyler smirked.

"Thanks?" I saw Bella look at the doorknob longingly.

"I bet you can handle me in the bedroom girly," Tyler started to lean into Bella, his eyes starting to close as he prepared himself for a kiss.

Once his eyes were fully closed Bella used that moment for her escape, effectively dodging him. We all jumped from the door and ran back to the living room. We heard Bella open the door completely, "Look I'll make this… fast, please don't call, don't send flowers, just… don't."

After she slammed the door we heard her make her way over. She just looked at us, "Let me go change, then you guys can laugh at me."

No one said anything - I don't think anyone even breathed. We all stood still before Bella reappeared wearing her PJ bottoms and a black zip up hoodie that she stole from me.

"Go ahead," she made her way over, and sat on the floor between Jasper and me.

"So, do we have to make fun of you fast too?" Emmett asked, causing all of laugh.

The next night was pretty much the same set up. Emmett, Jasper and I all hung around while the girls got Bella dressed up. His name was Erick Yorkie and apparently he was supposed to be the modern day Indiana Jones – definitely a Jasper pick. He was some type of archeologist whose publicist was trying to boost his popularity, trying to make learning seem cool.

Jasper stood up to go answer the doorbell, while I looked over at Emmett and gave him a 'are you ready' look. When I saw Jasper come back with the man, I couldn't help but think that the agency made some kind of mix up. He came up to Jasper's shoulder, but with the way that he cowered, he looked even smaller. I thought that Tyler was skinny, but this guy had the body of a ten-year-old little boy. His hair was black, and looked like he cut it himself. He wore a blue and white collared checkered shirt with a bright red bow tie. At least his tan slacks looked normal.

Emmett and I took our turns shaking his hand and introducing ourselves; he flinched when Emmett took a step closer to him. Alice quickly came out to tell us that they were going to be a few more moments, and looked at Eric as if he was a dying puppy.

"So, what kinds of things do you dig up?" Emmett asked trying to spark some kind of conversation, which turned out to be more difficult than originally anticipated. Even Jasper, who speaks history, couldn't manage to get more then two sentences out of him.

"Things…" Eric looked at his hands, "They tend to be old."

"Oh," Emmett looked over at me and threw his hands up in the air in defeat.

We sat there for another five minuets in pure, awkward silence before the girls made their appearance. Tonight Bella wore a dark yellow dress that went to her knees, and I was again left to wonder how Bella couldn't recognize her own beauty.

"Bella, this is Eric," Jasper sounded hopeful.

Bella walked up to Eric with such a warm smile, that I didn't doubt that she would be able to get him to talk. "Hi Eric," Bella held out her hand.

Eric looked like he was about to have a panic attack. He gaped at Bella, and his lower lip was starting to quiver. He looked over at Jasper as if trying to ask him to save him. After an encouraging smile from Jasper, Eric looked back at Bella's hand then finally grabbed it.

"We should go, I don't want to loose our reservations," Eric glanced at the rest of us, gave us all a nod then walked out the room, leaving Bella.

Bella looked back at us, "You all are fired from finding me dates."

Two hours later I was standing in the kitchen making popcorn. The group and I decided to have a movie marathon until Bella came home. Alice said that this was a much better way to spend a Friday and Saturday, much more entertaining then going out to the club.

I felt my cell vibrate in my pocket, indicating I had a text; it was from Bella.

**Hey, is everyone still there?**

_Yep, we are having a movie marathon._ I wrote back.

**You guys must have gone through five movies.**

_No, we just finished the first._

**Well it feels longer.**

I walked into the living room, grinning at Bella's response. "Guys, Bella is text messaging me. She says her date feel like forever."

"Is she texting in front on him?" asked Alice, "That is rude."

_Are you texting in front of him?_

**Not right now, he's in the bathroom.**

"She says he is in the bathroom right now,"

**But he has been hiding behind his menu. He won't talk.**

I laughed again, "She says that he is hiding behind his menu and won't talk."

"Well after last night's date she should be an expert at speeding things up," Emmett slapped his knee while he laughed at his own joke.

_Emmett says you need to be fast._

**Tell Emmett to grab and twist.**

Another hour went by before I got the text message from Bella saying that she was on her way home. So, like the loyal friends we were, we all piled up against the door, just like how we were the night before.

Bella stood there looking uncomfortable, while fiddling with her keys. Eric on the other hand seemed to have gained some courage, and was now staring at Bella freely; at least he was staring at her face.

"This was nice Eric," Bella offered with a smile.

"You are a very kind person." I think that was the most I heard Eric say.

"Thank you," Bella shifted on her feet, probably feeling guilty knowing that she was going to ignore whatever phone calls he was going to make.

Eric moved both of his arms so that they were stiffly at his side. He slowly bent forward, with his lips puckered, ready to kiss. I was ready for Bella to dodge his kiss, to push him away, to do anything to avoid the kiss. But I was not ready for Bella to stand there and kiss him back.

It looked very awkward, neither of them moved, and both of their hands stayed at their sides. I felt an over whelming need to go out there and stop him from kissing her… it must be because she is my friend… it must be.

After what felt like hours, Bella leaned away, wished him one last goodnight, and came inside to find all of us standing in the entrance way.

"You guys can't even pretend that you're not spying anymore?" Bella laughed as she made her way to the living room.

"You kissed him," I gasped while I followed her, the rest of the group trailing after me.

Bella sat down on the couch, a blush claiming her face. "It was a charity kiss."

"Oh," said Alice and Rosalie in unison. They both sat next to Bella on the couch as if she had explained everything.

"What is a charity kiss?" Jasper asked

"You kiss the guy because you feel sorry for him," Rose clarified with a shrug.

"Yeah, I probably would have charity kissed him too," Alice nodded.

"You what?" gaped Jasper, "Alice, you've never charity kissed anyone have you?"

"Not while dating you," Alice blinked.

"Look, it is obvious that the guy is not doing to well with the ladies," Bella explained, "I figured that is I kissed him, and then maybe he would get more confidence or something."

The pressure in my chest subsided a little once I heard her explanation. But I still couldn't ignore the feeling that swelled within me when I saw them. It's because I am her friend; I told myself for the millionth time, you just want to protect her. It's because I'm her friend.

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**So, I hope you guys all got a glimpse in the man that is Edward. So that question: Does he like Bella? Well he will not even let himself go there. But you and I both know the answer to that. Hehe**

**Ok, so the "grab and twist" it is something I say all the time to my guy friends when they piss me off. "Why don't just grab and twist." I am talking about their penis, just incase you didn't get it. :)**

**Lets see… the next chap will be going back into Bella's POV, but here is a little something for ya.**

**The next chapter is called, "_The Run In_." And someone comes back… GASP who? I would love to hear your thoughts.**

**And don't worry, things will definitely start heating up from here. Even I am getting pissed at these two, and I know where this is going.**

**(I am trying out this bold AN thing... i think i like it) haha**

**As always:**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	11. The Run In

**Hey, hey, hey! So YAY Chap 11. I was impressed that a lot of you guys guessed who was making an appearance in this chapter. SO as always I just want to thank everyone for reviewing, but unfortunately I am going to the institution that they call school and I am unable to go back and thank everyone, (I have tests coming up in the next couple of weeks) / **

**ANYWHO you are all amazing and I am MORE the happy that you guys are using me "grab and twist" or "eat fast and pee fast". Spread the word!**

**SO this chapter I needed to put a bunch of stuff together so that I can finally heat this up, so I am hopping that it all meshes. On my profile I have links to what their outfits look like.**

**I'm trying to think if there is anything else I need to address… if I forget I'm sorry.**

**I do not own Twilight, or the famous person that I use in here…. yep**

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Chapter 11- The Run In

Ever since my birthday, life seemed to be humming along. It's not that things have been going too fast or out of control, but everything felt more relaxed before. I'm not complaining, don't get me wrong. I loved having that week with Renee, but to have it followed up with those two dates … okay, so maybe I am complaining just a little bit.

But seriously, who wouldn't complain after two of the worst dates they ever had? They were complete disasters on their own, but to have the two back to back in the same weekend was too much. That Sunday I spent was at home recovering; although the whole time Emmett continued to harass me with imitations of Tyler. Apparently "eat fast and pee fast" was his new favorite slogan. The persecution was short lived, though; Rose was utterly depressed after seeing that one of her heroes was such a sleaze ball, and managed to make Emmett shut up.

Jasper continued to interrogate Alice on how many charity kisses she had given. Alice just told him that she didn't keep track of those kinds of things, which left Jasper frozen in place, mumbling something about hundreds.

Alice slapped Jasper behind his head, "I did not kiss hundreds of men just to make them feel better!" she hissed. "What kind of woman do you think I am? Just be thankful that I didn't put out for charity." She glanced over at Rose.

"Hey!" Rose yelled, "That was one time, and you know that the guy needed it!"

Emmett was busy talking to me in an accent similar to Tyler's when he heard what Rose said. He was at her side in an instant. "You slept with someone because you felt sorry for them?" Emmett looked a little sad, "I know we both have our history, but baby what kind of pathetic loser would ever be worthy of your lovin'?"

Alice started to giggle, as did I since I already knew the story, but the guys all seemed very confused.

"Hun," Rose started, trying to hide her laugher, "That pathetic loser was you."

Jasper and Edward erupted into laugher along with Alice and I, while Emmett stood there looking horror struck.

"But…" Emmett stuttered as he made his way to sit on the couch, Rose right at his side. "But, I used my skills, and… and I got you."

"I have never heard the story of how you two got together," Edward managed to say as his laughter died down.

"Apparently neither did I," Emmett mumbled.

Alice, Jasper, Edward and I all sat on the floor looking up to the couch to ready ourselves for the story. I had heard this a million times, but I was interested to see what Emmett's reaction would be.

Rose cleared her throat as she prepared to tell her story. "I was 23, and fresh out of college. I don't know how, but by some kind of miracle I landed a job at Cullen Agencies."

"I remember when you got the call!" Alice interrupted, "I don't think I have even been as drunk as I was when we went out partying that night."

"Oh yeah," Rose smiled as she reminisced what little she probably could. "Anyway, my first week was hell. Everyone was either hitting on me, or dismissing me for some kind of idiot. It was Friday night, and I called Alice up to see if she wanted to get some drinks, but she was busy with something else, I can't remember."

"I was at a job interview," Alice nodded.

"So I was sitting at the bar, completely depressed by my first week, when I heard some guy talking to the bartender," Rose grinned at Emmett. "I wasn't paying attention at first, but he just kept talking and talking, so I had to eavesdrop. 'I screwed up big time,'" Rose lowered her voice to mimic a more disheartened Emmett. "By the way he was talking I could tell he wasn't quite drunk, but he wasn't exactly sober either. 'My dad is going to fire me for sure. Crap, what is my mom going to say?'"

Jasper and Edward both laughed at Rose's impersonation, while Emmett glared at them quickly before going back to watch Rosalie. The look on Emmett's face was a mixture of love and awe.

"I didn't know who he was," Rose shrugged, "I thought his dad owned a Kinko's or something; I heard him mention something about messing up photocopies."

"I was supposed to make photocopies," Emmett grimaced, "but I accidentally shredded them. They were really important too."

Rose lifted her hand and cupped his face, looking into his eyes saying something that only they understood. I felt very uncomfortable sitting there. "Then I heard him go on about some girl that just dumped him," Rose continued.

"Oh yeah," exclaimed Jasper. "I remember her. Her name was Sophie right?"

"We started dating at the end of my senior year in college," Emmett nodded. "We weren't really serious - I always knew that it wasn't going any where, but she broke up with me a couple weeks before. That's when I really started to mess up. I tried to rebound and hook up with other girls, but I was just off. The pressure at work, and the fear of lousing my mo-jo… It was a bad night for me."

"I felt so bad for him," Rose smiled. "I figured that I was just going to do a little bit of charity flirting…"

"There is charity flirting too?" Jasper yelled.

"Oh hush, there is not harm in that," Alice patted his hand. "Sorry, keep going."

Rose laughed, "When I saw him, I was amazed." Rose looked over at Emmett. "He was obviously hot, but it was more then just his muscles, or his curly brown hair," Rose lifted her hand to run it through his hair. Emmett couldn't keep that silly grin off his face. "Or his bright blue eyes, or even his adorable dimples that I saw when he talked. No, it was more: he was beautiful."

Alice and I both awed while Emmett leaned down and gave Rose a gentle kiss. "So that is when I upgraded him to charity sex," Rose smirked.

Emmett shook his head, "But that's not how I remember it. I was sitting at the bar, talking to the bartender when you came up and sat down right beside me. You knocked me right out of my pity party," Emmett laughed. "Then I started flirting with you, and then you and I left for your place."

"Emmett," Rose snorted, "you were horrible at flirting. It was obvious that you had lost your touch. I kept going on with whatever you were saying. You have to remember, it was for charity, Em."

Emmett's face fell. "But after that night I thought I had my mo-jo back. Then I started doing really well at work… So I really had nothing back. Do I have anything now?"

"Awww, Em," Rose climbed onto Emmett's lap, stroking his head. "Look at it this way; if you weren't so great in bed, I would have never called you back. You have your mo-jo" Rose kissed him on the cheek.

A silly grin came back up to Emmett's face. "That was a pretty good night."

"I remember when Rose called me the next day," Alice chirped. "She kept saying that she was supposed to be doing him the favor but he was the one who really serviced her."

We all laughed while Emmett's silly grin became a smug one.

"Any who," Rose spoke over our laughter. "It was the best sex I ever had, so I figured that I'd give him my number in case he wanted to hook up again. I was surprised when he called me the next day asking if I wanted to go out on date. And he didn't sound like the nervous guy at the bar."

"That's because I got my game back," Emmett winked. "Plus you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen and I would be an idiot if I let you get away."

"So we started dating," Rose shrugged.

"But how did you guys not run into each other at work? Or when did you find out he was the owner's son?" Edward asked, and seemed really into this story.

"Well, I quickly picked that up once I told someone that I worked at Cullen Agencies, they would try to get me to publish their book, or get them signed," Rose answered. "So I made a point of not telling him where I worked, or what I did."

"Same here," Emmett piped up. "I never asked her where she worked, and she never asked where I did either." Emmett turned to Rose. "But I'm surprised that you didn't connect my last name to Cullen Agencies."

"I was too busy trying to not have you talk about where I worked!" Rose smiled.

"So how long did you guys date before you realized?" Edward asked again.

"Three months," they both said in unison.

"It was our three month anniversary, and I already knew that he was the man I wanted to be with for the rest of my life," Rose once again looked up at Emmett. "I was trying to get out early so I would make our reservations on time. I had to drop a file over at Carlisle's office so I could quickly go over it with him, when some idiot ran into me!"

"No, no, no," Emmett interrupted. "I was just talking to my dad, telling him about the amazing girl that I was dating, and he was trying to convince me to introduce her. I had just looked at my watch and realized that I was already running a little late, and I stepped out side when I was attacked."

Rose rolled her eyes as she let Emmett continue the story.

"All I heard was a string of profanities; she must have been running because she knocked both of us down. I kept apologizing, even though it wasn't my fault, and when we reached for the same paper we finally looked at each other."

"I have never been speechless before," Rose shook her head. "But when I saw him there, outside of my boss's office, everything started to click in my head. I heard that Carlisle had a son who was working his way up in the company, but no one really took an interest in him since he was doing a good job; nothing to gossip on."

"I don't know how long we stared at each other," Emmett continued. "But finally my dad cleared his throat and said, 'I think it is safe to say that I am now meeting the woman you were speaking of before.' When I asked him later how he knew that it was the Rose I was talking about, he said that he could tell by the way I looked at her; it was the same way he looks at my mother."

Emmett stared at Rose with such devotion that I had to look away, and again I felt like I was interrupting something.

"We have two anniversaries now," Rose whispered as she continued to look at Emmett. "One on the night we first got together, and the other on the day when we could finally be open with our relationship."

We were all quiet as we took in the story.

Rose sighed, "Best thing I ever did for charity."

Luckily both Tyler and Eric were not like Mike. Tyler called Rosalie one time after our date. Rose told me that she was trying to let him down gently (although he was a complete disappointment, she still had a soft spot for him.) However, when he started hitting on her and said something about tying her up like a hog, she put him in his place. I hear he lost the last race he was in…

Eric … well I think poor Eric was too scared to call, or send any flowers. I did hear that he went out on another date with some other girl; the charity kiss did its job!

The tabloids were having field day with my two dates in the same weekend. When I was out with Tyler, the paparazzi kept asking how Mike was taking the break up. These people seriously need to at least attempt to get the story semi-correct.

On the date with Eric, they didn't ask if we were going out, they just automatically assumed that I was going out to dinner with a friend. I even heard one guy say that no one would ever think I was going out with a loser like Eric. I felt bad for the guy, so I kind of played it up. I wrapped myself onto his arm while resting my head on his shoulder. Once I did that the cameramen went crazy taking pictures, asking some very inappropriate questions.

Poor Eric, he looked so frightened when I playfully flirted with him in front of an audience. I think it was too much for him to take in because once we sat down in the restaurant he closed up and literally hid behind his menu.

Some magazines were questioning my taste in men. Others were calling me a serial dater. Either way, Rose was excited once again by how much people were talking about me; I was very thankful that I lived in Seattle - a place where I could easily hide from the limelight.

On Sunday morning I received a frantic phone call from Alice, saying that her, Rose, and I all needed to go out and get breakfast ASAP.

I was jumping around in my room trying to pull up my pants and brush my teeth at the same time. Why did I let Alice buy me these stupid skinny jeans? I could barely pull them up with both hands, and now here I was trying to not let toothpaste dribble out of my mouth while pulling up the dark blue jeans that were only making it to just bellow my butt.

"Bella, what is going on?" I heard a voice ask.

I wheeled around to see who it was, but got caught on the legs of the pants that were flapping around my feet and fell on the ground, landing face first leaving my butt up in the air showing the army green boy-shorts style underwear I was wearing. I groaned as I pulled the toothbrush out of my mouth.

"Edward, what are you doing?" I said, at least that is what I intended to say, however with the toothpaste still in my mouth I ended up sounding like Scooby Doo. I rolled to my side, got on my knees and attempted to stand. I safely managed myself onto my feet. I glared at Edward who seemed to be enjoying himself watching my misery.

I let my pants fall to my knees as I leaned over my sink to spit out the stupid paste. I felt eyes on me and looked to my side to see Edward looking at me with an odd expression. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror to see that I was only in my black spaghetti top and my boy-shorts underwear.

"What?" I blurted out after I spit one last time, my blush making its appearance.

Edward shrugged as he surveyed my body, "Nothing really, I'm just realizing how much you have… grown since high school."

My face was on fire as I reached down to pull up my pants, now that I had both hands. "You're just realizing that now?" I teased while trying to ignore how fast my heart just sped up.

Edward just smirked. "So why are you jumping around while feebly trying to multitask?"

I quickly glared at him before making my way back into my room to slip on my black ballerina flats. "I got this phone call from Alice this morning demanding that her, Rose, and I all go out for breakfast this morning. Alice is normally hyper, but she sounded… I'm not sure how to describe it." I laughed, "She was so excited that she couldn't talk. That's never happened to her before."

I was switching my wallet from my purse to my messenger back waiting for a response from Edward. When he didn't say anything I turned back around to see a knowing grin on his face.

"What do you know?" I demanded.

"Nothing I can tell you," he turned to leave my room.

"Wait, you have to tell me!" I whined.

"Look if it is what I think it is," Edward sat down on his piano bench. "Then you should get going so you can find out."

I walked over to the bench and sat down next to him. I forced my lower lip out in a pout, letting my eyebrows pull together while I slightly widening my eyes. I was never good at the whole fake pout thing, that was always Alice's forte, but when Edward looked down at me I saw the panic in his eyes. I felt kind of bad, but if it got me what I wanted who was I to judge?

"I…I…" Edward stuttered before he shook his head to clear his mind and looked away from me. "You should go let Alice tell you."

"You know, that little punk calls us up on a Sunday morning," Rose complained, "and then she is fifteen minuets late!"

Rose and I were at the restaurant that Alice told us to meet her at. We had already ordered our drinks and were waiting for the one who called this meeting together. Even I had to admit that I was a little irritated that she would leave us in such suspense. Luckily we didn't have to wait too long until we heard Alice's excited squeals.

"I am so sorry," she quickly gave both Rose and I a hug before she sat down in her seat. Alice was normally a happy, excited person, however at this moment she seemed to almost glow, and she couldn't contain herself.

"Oh my God," gasped Rose, "Are you pregnant?" she must have been thinking the same thing as me.

"No," Alice giggled as she took a sip from her water. After a moment went by it was obvious that she was done drinking, yet she still held the water to her face. I could see Alice smile behind her glass, and was wondering why she was wiggling her eyebrows.

What was she doing? And what is that stupid thing shining light into my eyes? I searched for the culprit and found the cause of the light to be a big diamond ring that rested on her left hand between her pinky and middle finger.

"AAAAAAA!!" I screamed, Rose screaming right with me.

"Oh my God, oh my God," I kept chanting as I grabbed Alice's hand. Rose reached over and tried to tug Alice's hand out of my own to see the ring; I wouldn't let her and we ended up having a small battle of tug-of-war.

The ring was beautiful to say the least. It was a square cut diamond that stood on its own. It rested on a silver band which rested neatly on her finger.

"When did this happen?" I asked, while reluctantly letting go of her hand.

"Friday," Alice beamed.

"So that is why I couldn't get a hold of you Friday night," Rose mumbled as she continued to hold on to Alice's hand.

"Yep," I was surprised that Alice couldn't get out more then a word right now; and she couldn't get that smile off her face.

"What about yesterday?" I asked. "I called a couple times yesterday to see if you wanted to hang out, but it went straight to voice mail."

"Well yesterday I wanted to spend it with only Jasper before we go telling everyone." Alice took back her hand and examined the ring herself. "Don't you love it? It's Tiffany's."

"So tell us what happened," I insisted.

"Oh it was just so romantic!" she squealed before rushing into her story. "He told me he wanted to go out on Friday, and I thought it was going to be like one of our other dates, so I didn't tell anyone. He told me to wear my favorite outfit, which just so happens to be this really pretty light blue dress that I bought the other day. It's pretty simple, but really classy. Anyway, he was really cryptic about where we were going. He just kept saying 'it's a surprise,' so I didn't push it."

Rose and I both looked at each other and exchanged and knowing look. Alice not trying to figure out the surprise would be like Alice not wanting to go to an exclusive fashion show.

"Ok, well maybe I did bug him a little bit," she confessed. "But I was really good after that."

Rose and I both laughed as we let Alice proceed with her story.

"We drove for a bit, the whole time he kept telling me how much he loved me; how he felt when he first saw me, when he knew he loved me." Alice's eyes glazed over a bit as she thought back to Jasper. Rose and I both knew not to interrupt. Alice took a deep breath before continuing. "Before I knew it we were at the beach, by the docks. He rented a yacht for Friday and Saturday and placed candles all over and rose petals and he had champagne and music playing in the background and… it was perfect."

I could just picture the two dancing on the deck watching the sky as one by one the stars would appear; I could almost see the two of them looking into each other's eyes, knowing that they would spend the rest of their lives with each other and Jasper knowing that he was about to make it official….

I was going to have to ask Jasper if I could borrow that for a story.

"Finally after we ate, danced, and drank," Alice continued. "We cuddled on this little makeshift bed that he made on the deck, and we watched the moon and the tide. Finally he looked over at me and said, 'Alice, you had my heart from the moment I saw you. You had my mind from the moment we first spoke. You had my complete and utter devotion from our first kiss.' Then he opened the box to show me the ring and then he said, 'And if you would marry me, become my wife and wear this ring, you will have my life.'"

I saw Alice's eyes become teary as she recounted her night. I looked over at Rose and saw that even her eyes were watery. Even I had to wipe away a tear that threatened to trail down my face.

"And we spent the rest of the night, and all of yesterday together," Alice finished her story.

"That is so sweet," sighed Rose.

"So Jasper is your fiancé?" it was not really a question, but I had to say the actual word.

"Fiancé," swooned Alice. "I really like the sound of that."

We went out to celebrate that night with drinks. I lost track with how many times I punched Edward. I was annoyed that he didn't tell me that Jasper was planning to propose. He just shrugged off my complaints, telling me that he didn't know the details, or even when it was going to happen, just that he knew the Jasper was planning to.

"That is not the point," I whined. We were just coming back from the cocktail bar after celebrating with everyone. I was a wee bit drunk and had just stumbled into the entryway; when Edward caught me before I fell. The only problem was that he was drunk as well causing us both to crash into the wall.

I started to giggle, while Edward tried to steady himself. "Stop trying to distract me," I said, managing to calm myself down. When Edward ignored my complaints I threw my fist in his general direction, missing horribly, and ended up toppling into him.

"Will you stop your antics?" he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. At first I was completely confused by what he was doing, but once realization dawned on me, I started kicking and screaming until he threw me onto my couch.

"Now, no more complaining," Edward sat at the end of the couch, my legs resting on his lap.

"You lied to me," I threw my hand to my chest in a dramatic way. "I thought we were friends! You do not hide something this big from one of your friends."

"It's all out in the open, so what does it matter now?" he shrugged, his head resting against the couch with his eyes closed.

"It means she is gone," my eyes started to burn with tears. That is one of the bad things I hated when I drank; my mood swings.

"Who?" asked Edward in a tired voice.

"Alice," I broke out in a full sob. Edward's eyes popped open - worry written all over his face.

"She isn't going anywhere," He leaned over and pulled me into an upright position and tucked me under his arm.

"But she is going to get married," I felt the little eyeliner and mascara I wore start to fall down my face.

"You are not going to see her any less then you do now."

"Bu...bu…but she isn't going to be my single friend anymore," I stuttered.

Edward stroked my hair, "She wasn't single in the first place. She is going to be happy, isn't that what you want?"

I sniffled while I tried to regain some composure. "Of course I do, it's just that it's all starting. First her, then Rose, then Angela, and then I am going to be all by myself."

God, pity parties were so pathetic, but did I mention I was drunk?

"You're not planning on finding the love of your life and getting married and having a bunch of babies?" Edward spoke in a soft voice, helping calm me down.

"I don't know, I guess; I haven't really thought about it," I sighed. "It's not like any guy is really interested."

"Bella," he groaned. "Why are you so blind? Do you know how many guys check you out?"

I shook my head, "No, no, not what I mean," I hiccupped. "Guys will check out anything that walks, but do any of them fight for me? Nope."

"You want someone who fights for you?" I looked over and saw Edward resting his head on the couch again, his eyes struggling to stay open.

"I want someone to make an effort," that was the last thing I remember before falling back onto the couch, my legs once again on Edward lap, and falling asleep.

Ugh, I hate spider webs, even if they are fake ones. On the first Saturday of the month of October, Alice ingrained it in me that I had to decorate the apartment. Alice decorated for every holiday or event that she could. Throughout the years I tried to resist, but I eventually gave up and got into it, too, though only for Halloween and Christmas, which is exactly what I was putting up: Halloween decorations.

I never was as ostentatious as Alice, but I thought my decorations were nice. I changed the place mats on the dinning room table to black and orange checkered ones with black napkins. I had a black blanket with white skeletons embroidered on it draped over the couch, which complimented the skeleton coasters on the coffee table.

At the moment, I was trying to place fake spider webs along Edward's piano, to give it an old creepy feel. Instead, I managed to get most of the sticky crap in my hair.

I would have asked Edward come help me, but Emmett had called him into the office this morning. Edward said that Emmett sounded serious, which was never a good sign for Emmett. I felt bad for Edward, he was freaking out before he left, trying to think of any meeting or deadline he might have missed. I kept telling him that he had nothing to worry about. The guy was basically becoming an overnight sensation, and he was getting paid like one as well. We were financial equals, and I couldn't be more proud of him.

He told me that he was getting paid much better now than when he was an accountant. Every time I thought about the complete one-eighty that he did… it astounds me. How someone could have as much courage as he did is beyond me. Edward was truly an amazing man. He completely rebuilt a new and better world for himself and did it with such grace… Well, after the whole beer binge he went through, it was all grace after that.

I sighed knowing that I could never be as brave as him. I was really lucky to have him in my life.

"Bella!" I heard his velvety voice call out frantically. Oh God, he was fired. But why would I think that he was fired? Didn't I just list all of the great qualities that he has?

Edward ran into the sitting room with the largest smile that I had ever seen on his face, his eyes shining like gem stones, his hair completely ruffled by his hands, and his strong chest kept rising up and down as if he had just run here. He was an amazing and beautiful man.

"Bella!" Edward ran to me, picked me up by my waist, and spun me in the air while I held onto his shoulder, squealing. It was like a clip from a movie.

"Oh my God," Edward panted as he set me back down, but still held onto my waist. "Bella…" He kept his mouth open, as if he was searching for the words to say.

"What?" I heard the excitement in my voice; how could I not be happy when he was standing there jumping around?

"Emmett was just messing with me when he called earlier sounding serious, he just wanted to play with my head," Edward's smile faded a little and was replaced with annoyance for a slight moment before going back to the excitement it held before. "He sat me down and told me that someone heard one of my compositions and that they called the agency and said that they wanted to work with me!"

I was biting my lip at this point, completely thrilled by what Edward was telling me. "Well, who is it?" I asked when he didn't continue speaking.

"Andrew Lloyd Webber!"

I started to scream, jumping up and down with Edward. We were like teenyboppers who just saw their favorite boy-band.

I pulled Edward into a tight hug, receiving just as much force from him. "Edward this is great! What are you guys going to work on? When are you meeting him? Can I meet him too? Is it going to be for a movie, or a stage production or-"

Edward placed his hand over my mouth cutting me off. "Emmett told me that it's not going to be for a couple of months, and he wants me to work on a piece. He didn't say what kind; just whatever I feel is right. I don't know any details yet, and when the time comes I will smuggle you in to meet him."

Edward moved his hand away from my mouth leaving me to jump right in, "Edward this is fantastic! We have to go out! We need to do something for this."

Edward's smile grew even more so, "Actually, I was wondering if I get to claim a day where we all have to do what I want?"

I blinked, "Yeah, of course you do."

"Well then, I want to claim it."

Everyone was just as ecstatic about Edward's news as I was, and were just as excited about what he had planned. At first he didn't tell us anything just that on Saturday the 18th we needed to be free. Alice was the most upset with this news, saying she only had two weeks to get her outfit and my outfit picked out. After repeated phone calls, a few threatening text messages, and many loud visits, Edward finally caved and told us we were going to the symphony.

I was really excited about this, until I found out that he already bought everyone's tickets. By now we both knew that he was financially stable enough to move out, but we worked well together and enjoyed each others company; now we were actual roommates instead of me just helping him out. But I didn't care about the fact that he had money now, it still pissed me off that he would spend some of it on me when it was his night to celebrate!

Alice was more than excited that we were going somewhere nice and had to get full-length gowns. Rose came with us on our shopping trips. That's right, "trips," that's the plural! Alice insisted that one wasn't enough to find the perfect gown. Rose told me that she leaked the news that I was going to the symphony and that there might be a some paparazzi there. I highly doubted that would be the case. Sure they were interested in me when I was on a date with someone famous, but why would they want a picture of just plain old Bella?

Alice and Rose were taking this night very seriously; not just that fact that we were all out celebrating, but it just gave them an excuse to dress to the nines, and go to the spa. All of Friday, the day before we were going to the symphony, I was plucked, waxed, and polished. (I didn't even know I had that much hair on me, but apparently I did.) God, I hate being "pampered."

Everyone had agreed to get ready at the apartment so that we could all leave once we were ready. I was pretty sure that the guys were done by now; I could hear some kind of sports game being played. It was so easy being a guy, all they had to do was zip, and tie and they were ready, whereas I had just finished my epic battle with my nylons and was close to victory with my strapless bra.

"Jeez from the noise you were making it sounded like you were fighting in a war or something." Alice walked out of my bathroom placing her earrings in. She looked beautiful in her gold dress. For Alice it was pretty simple, but the sweetheart neckline and the tight bodice outlining her chest still made her stand out. It clung to her waist but flowed off from there to the ground. The back of her dress was amazing, it had two crisscrosses, one larger one at the top of her back, and one at the small of her back. She was a vision in gold.

"Well I feel like I'm at war," I mumbled as I started to strap on the death traps someone had the nerve to call shoes. I still hadn't put on my dress yet, but I knew I would never manage to reach over and tie those once I was wrapped tight in my dress.

"Hey, can I borrow this purse?" Rose asked as she walked out my closet. She was absolutely drop-dead gorgeous; which is probably what Emmett will do once he sees her. Her dress was a bright turquoise, making her long blond hair pop even more so. It was a strapless dress with a neckline reminding me of a heart. On her abdomen were a bunch of little crystals which formed a large diamond shape. The silky dress was completely tight, up until her knees where the hemline circled around her. From the there, loose material made its way to the floor, but not without leaving a very large slip revealing her long legs.

"Yeah, sure, use whatever you want, as long as you can help me into this thing," I lifted the dress from my bed. "You guys remember the last time I tried to put on a full length gown by myself?"

Rose laughed while Alice grimaced, "You fell, wrinkling the thing. You're right let me help you."

I really did love my dress, even if it could have been the death of me. It was a very soft and pretty brown which somehow made my eyes pop. I didn't know that brown eyes could pop. It was a simple strapless dress and the bodice clung to my waist and chest in a I-can-still-breathe kind of a way. There were very pretty beaded floral designs along my waist that still seemed to be subtle enough. The material gathered along my knees then slightly ruffled to the floor. I felt very pretty.

"Thanks," I told Alice as I reached over and grabbed my hand bag from my bed. "Well, you guys ready to go?"

We walked out to the living room, and I was impressed to say the least. The guys all looked amazing. I had to smile when I saw Emmett; he was dressed in a classic style of tux, with a black jacket which fitted his very muscular shoulders quite well, black pants, crisp white shirt, and a black bowtie. I had to smile, though, because of Emmett's reaction to Rosalie: just as I thought, he nearly dropped dead.

Alice must have helped pick out Jasper's outfit. He had on a black fitted jacket on as well, only he left his unbuttoned revealing a gold vest and tie which matched Alice's dress. If he was willing to put up with her dressing him, then they were made for each other.

I felt very awkward when I looked at Edward; a weed should never look at a rose for too long, but I couldn't help myself- he just looked so good. He had on a new fitted black jacket showing the silver vest and tie he had on underneath. It looked like he purposely did not shave, leaving a little scruff on his face, which contradicted the outfit perfectly, and he almost had a handle on his hair, but with that thought, a little piece fell into eyes. His piercing green eyes continued to stare at me from the moment I walked out of my room, and I couldn't help but blush.

Edward walked over to my side, "You look beautiful," he smiled.

"You look amazing," I admitted, increasing my blush. Why was I blushing? I had no problem telling Jasper or Emmett when they looked good. What made Edward different?

"A compliment?" Edward gasped in fake shock, "Well, I must look good for you to say so."

I rolled my eyes and looked at the rest of the group, "So how many cars should we drive?"

"No need," interrupted Edward. "I got us a limo for the night."

If Edward had not pulled out the it's-my-night-so-we-have-to-do-what-I-say card, I would have put up even more of a fight about him not letting me pay him back.

"It is my night Bella, and you are not allowed to ruin it."

He was right - I didn't want to ruin his night. But still, he spent enough money as it was already.

Benaroya Hall was where the symphonies in Seattle were held. Like all things tonight, the hall was beautiful. As well pulled up to the round side of the building, the lights shone through the windows that made up most of the structure. There were people dressed up walking in and out building; they all looked so happy and elegant in their long gowns and tuxedos.

We all climbed out of the limo, and since Edward had the tickets with him we just walked straight in. There was a large orchestra set up in the center of the stage with the seats spreading away from it and box seats rising up on the walls.

Edward got us some pretty good seats - at least I thought they were good. We were up in one of the boxes sitting off to the side. Edward said that the seats were not that great, but I hushed him the moment the lights went out.

The music was beyond words. It echoed off the walls and into my very bones. I looked over at Rose and Emmett who were sitting to my left. Rose seemed relaxed, something that has been hard for her to do lately with all the stress at work. Emmett on the other hand was on the edge of his seat. I have never seen Emmett this intense about something relating to the arts. Jasper and Alice, who sat on Edward's right, looked very comfortable. It looked like Edward was not sure on where to look. He would glance at the stage, then over at me, back to the stage, or then to either Jasper and Alice or Emmett and Rose. He looked so excited to see our expressions, or how we would react to certain parts of the music.

The music slowly started to die down, ending for intermission. I leaned over to Edward, "So when am I going to hear them play a Mason Original?"

Edward grinned leaning into me, "One day," he whispered.

"One day soon," I nudged him, "You are going to be working with Andrew Lloyd Weber!" I grabbed his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Everyone is going to hear your music Edward, and they are going to love it."

"Thank you Bella," he squeezed my hand back.

"I need to use the bathroom," whined Emmett.

"I do too actually," nodded Alice.

"Well we have 45 minuets before we have to be back here," Edward stood up. "We should all get up and stretch our legs."

No wonder they gave us 45 minuets to go use the restroom, it looked like everyone in the building had to relieve him or herself. I had already used the facilities, Alice and Rose were checking their makeup, and Emmett and Jasper were still in restrooms; apparently the unique sink had Emmett mesmerized.

Edward and I were hanging out by a staircase that no one seemed to be using. I was laughing as he was telling me a joke that Jasper told him. I was waiting for the punch line when I noticed Edward getting stiff. He was looking over my shoulder with an expression that I could not quite understand.

He looked hurt, angry, shocked, and yet somehow relieved.

"Edward, are you alright?" I asked worried at what had him this way.

He looked surprised when he saw me and a wave of calm washed over him. "Sorry it's just," he looked back over my shoulder and that same multi-expression came back.

I turned around to see what he was looking at. I was flooded with high school insecurities when I saw who he was looking at. She was hard to miss in her fuchsia colored halter dress which had a plunging neck line leaving little to the imagination. Although I had not seen her in years, I knew exactly who she was. Lauren.

She had not changed much since high school in the physical sense, and I'm sure mentally as well. She looked pissed off with her arms folded and her nose wrinkled.

Before my anger for Edward was the only thing that was on my mind, but now that I had forgiven him and become friends with him once again, all the rage I had against Lauren took the front seat now; only to be fueled even more so with the knowledge of what she did to Edward.

"Do you want me to trip her?" I asked in a harsh whisper. "Because I can."

Edward shook his head, his jaw tightening as he looked at who she was there with. I felt my mouth drop. I recognized almost everyone there; they were all Edward's "friends" from back in high school. I felt sick and needed to rest against the wall. It had been years, and I had finally come to a resolution with Edward, so why did seeing them (the people who humiliated me during high school) bring back so many insecurities that I thought I had overcome?

Edward noticed my change in mood and looked down at me, concern surpassing the anger he previously felt. "Bella, are you alright?" he asked as he gripped my arms making sure I didn't fall.

"Bella!" I heard Alice and Rose frantic voices call. "Edward, what's wrong with her? What's wrong with you for that matter?"

Edward looked at Jasper, who had followed behind the girls with Emmett. They held onto each other's stares for a while until Edward finally looked back over to where Lauren stood.

"Lauren is here?" Jasper gasped.

Rose, Alice and Emmett whipped their head around to see where he as looking at.

"Edward, that is almost everyone you use to hang out with," he shook his head. "They all went to your high school too." Jasper looked at me with understanding eyes.

"Ugh, I want to go kick her ass right now," Rosalie growled, shocking Edward.

"Why? She never did anything you," Edward whispered.

Alice, who had been standing at my side, walked over to Edward and gave him a hug, a simple gesture that seemed to mean the world to him. "You are our friend Edward. Who ever hurts you, hurts us."

"Plus they messed with Bella," Emmett added. "Which means we hurt them."

"As much as I love being all touchy feely," Rose rumbled. "I hate to break it to you but it looks like they are coming this way; all of them."

I felt my heart sink. There were four guys, plus Lauren. I recognized Tom, and he seemed to have healed nicely. Next to Tom walked Bret; he was always the "strong" one in the group, at least that is what Edward told me. If I didn't know Emmett, I would have thought Bret was the biggest guy I have ever seen, but Em was still a little bigger. Next to Lauren, a shorter man with slightly longer black hair stood; that was Nick and he looked like just as much of a pig as when he was in high school. Strutting aside Nick was David- David was probably the only guy in high school who could have given Edward competition in the looks department. Although Edward could care less, David was always comparing himself to Edward.

When David got a clear view of who he was walking towards, he pushed Nick out of the way so that he could slip his arm around Lauren, keeping his eyes on Edward. Edward's whole demeanor changed. He took a few steps so that he was in the front of the group, his back straighter, his fist clenched; he was waiting for this.

David looked at the people who backed Edward up. He glanced over at Jasper with brief recognition, his eyes bulged slightly when he looked at Emmett, he had to do a double take when he saw Alice, and he looked at Rose up and down before his eyes fell on me, and stayed there.

I hated how he looked at me, it felt like I needed to cross my arms over my chest, or needed to throw some thick blankets over me. Edward must have noticed David's leer, as he stepped aside to stand in front of me.

"Edward," Lauren called once they reached us. "So this is where you have been hiding out." Her voice was just as shrill as it was back in high school.

"I wouldn't call it hiding out," Edward's voice managed to remain at an even tone. "I would call it making a new and better life for myself."

Lauren frowned, "Well you got your stupid box back."

"I did," Edward grinned looking over at Tom who had sunk away to the back of the group. "And how is your nose, Tom? It looks like it healed; a little crooked though…" he trailed off.

"So what are you doing now, man?" Bret asked. He sounded truly curious.

"I'm finally doing my dream job, which none of you would know about, and I made a life that's filled with people that I love and consider to be true friends." I saw Emmett, Jasper, Alice, and Rosalie all shine when Edward said that; even I felt better after hearing that.

"Yes you have some very interesting new friends," David spat, whose eyes were still glued to me.

Lauren glared at me for a moment before blinking back in shock, "Swan?" she spat. "You can't be fucking Bella Swan?"

I felt like that awkward 17-year-old girl again when Lauren started to laugh. "Oh, you have got to be kidding me!" Lauren took a step closer to get a better look at me. "Are you going to tell me you were invited to this concert too?"

The guys behind her started to laugh, making me feel smaller. Oh God, this is going to happen again. Edward is going to deny being my friend again, and then they are all going to laugh at me again. I thought I had gotten over these stupid feelings! Why don't they ever go away? Why did they have such a hold on me? I can't do this! I need to get out of here, away from them; just like last time.

I stumbled forward, but was stopped by a strong arm wrapping around my waist. "Bella is one of my new friends, or really I should say old friend. You see she was one of my real friends from back in high school, but as you all know, I behaved utterly barbaric."

He was standing up for me! My heart started to race and tears of joy demanded to make an appearance. I don't know how many nights I dreamed that this is how it would have gone all those years ago. "But she has grown into a bigger person then I could ever dream of being," Edward continued. "And we have made amends."

"She certainly has grown," David whispered just loud enough for us to hear. "I could barely recognize her. The years certainly have been good to you Bella."

Was he seriously talking to me while he was groping Lauren's ass? And without even an apology for high school!

"Whatever," Lauren huffed, "I've seen you in magazines, dating those losers, they can put you in a fancy dress, somehow manage to calm that frizz which is your hair, and they can even put make-up on a man and somehow make him look good; but I will always remember you as that pathetic little girl who was always lusting after my boyfriend!"

Ouch, bitch much?

"Wow, and I thought I held on to the past," I laughed, finding my confidence. "Yes I have dated some losers, but guess what? They were all a publicity stunt. Because unlike you, people actually care about what I do, where I go, and what I wear. So yes, I do wear nice clothes, with the nice money that I make, and I do get my hair and make-up done, but I still manage to look classy, unlike your whore-ish ass, trying to relive her glory days of high school. And if you really want to go back to high school and discuss the issue of me talking to your ex-boyfriend, well it is kind of pathetic that he had to come to me for some actual intellectual conversation."

I was panting since I practically said my whole speech in one breath. Everyone from both groups was staring at me with open mouths except Edward who was just grinning.

"And speaking of your stupidity," I spoke lightly. "Why are you all here?"

"I… we…" Lauren stuttered, not quite sure of what I just said.

"She won tickets on the radio," Nick answered, who, disgustingly enough, seemed to be a little turned on by my little rant. "Only she didn't know what kind of concert it was."

"Shut up Nick," Lauren hissed. "Why the hell are you all here?"

"Celebrating," Edward answered sounding extremely happy.

"Celebrating what?" Lauren sounded worried at Edward's tone.

Edward tightened his grip on me, his smile widening. "I'm sure you will hear about it in the paper soon enough, but until then I would prefer to spend this evening with the company of my friends."

I wasn't paying attention to when my friends cheered and high fived me, or concentrating on the music that filled the hall once again. No, I could only keep replaying what Edward said. I know that he had apologized to me, and I really did forgive him, but I still felt like history was about to repeat itself tonight. But it didn't. Instead I walked away from this with a smile on my face. I was distracted the entire time on the drive home.

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward sounded worried as he locked the door to the apartment.

I quickly turned around and threw my arms around his neck, shoving my face into his warm chest. He seemed shocked at first but quickly wrapped his arms around me once he realized what I was doing.

"Thank you," I whispered, no longer able to hold back the tears.

"For what?" asked Edward as he stroked my hair.

"For being my friend," I sniffed.

"Bella, you never have to thank me for that," he soothed. "You are the amazing one."

I clung to him even tighter. I didn't realize just how much his friendship meant to me; it was on a different level than what I had with Alice and Rose, or Jasper and Emmett. I don't know why I felt like I needed Edward. All I knew was that I don't think I could survive now without him in my life.

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**It was Lauren! Yay to everyone who got it right! It needed to be done, you know see the ex and when you see them what do you feel, you know. Isn't Lauren a bitch/slut?**

**Just incase you didn't read the top AN, I have the link on my page of what their outfits look like when they go to the symphony.**

**Hope you liked the story of Emmett and Rose, I had no idea I was going there until I started writing it. Haha. If some of you do not know who Andrew Lloyd Weber is, Google him. I think he is amazing, but he won me over with Phantom of the Opera. So I am a tad bit bias.**

**The place that they went to, Benaroya Hall it a real place. I did a bit of homework here. And if some of you are confused on what the dates are, well here is a little surprise for you (b/c I was surprised when I saw realized it haha) the days to the dates are what they are for this year.**

**Bella's B/day, yep the 13th is on a Saturday. So Alice was proposed to on Sept. 26th (Friday) Bella finds out the 28th (Sunday).**

**Edward finds out the ALW news on Oct. 4th (Saturday). They go to the Symphony on the 18th (Saturday) I was not planning this, it just happened, so now I have to keep this up haha.**

**So the next chapter I think I am going back to Edward's POV, so you all can understand what he is thinking. I am not going to redo the chap in his POV b/c I always hate rereading, so it will just be a summary.**

**_Next chapter is call:_ "Halloween"**

**I do not think I have any clues to leave for the next chap, but come on, tension + sexy outfits interesting chapter.**

**Hope you enjoyed :)**


	12. Halloween

**Hello all. So I am very happy, why you ask. Well not only because you all rock my sock (oh yeah) but I am really excited with how much you guys like Em and Rose's story. I got carried away there, but felt bad about cutting it out, so it stayed. haha**

**Last time I KNEW I forgot something, to thank my Betas Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter. Let us all thank them for a moment, b/c we all know how bad my spelling is. So YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY them!**

**Check out my profile page thing, it has inproved links to last chapter and this chapter. AND **I am doing this contest thing**, if you can call it a contest… ANYWAY**

**I do not own Twilight**

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Chapter 12- Halloween

Edward's POV

Early the next morning I lay awake in my bed. I had not gotten much sleep that night, not with so many things running through my mind. The first and foremost of my thoughts were of Bella.

I was so unsure of what to do when she started crying when we got back from the symphony last night. I could tell that she was upset, but something told me that it didn't have anything to do with our run in with Lauren. I could tell that she was worried just by the way that she held onto me for dear life. All I could do was hold her, and although I felt completely useless, I knew that was all she was looking for.

Never in a million years would I have guessed that I might have seen Lauren at the symphony, let alone with our old group of friends. I have wondered what I would feel when I saw her again; at one point I feared that there could have been a part of me that might have still loved her. But last night when I saw her, I felt nothing.

Well that is a slight lie; I was pretty pissed off at her. And to see her there with all of the people I used to consider friends was like rubbing salt into an old wound. I think the hardest part was knowing that she slept with all of them except Bret. When I caught her fooling around with David, it was Bret who I went to. I thought he would be just as shocked as I was, but when I told him I could see his eyes trying to hide something from me. Eventually I convinced him (threatened, really) to tell me everything.

I didn't care if Bret had slept with Lauren or not-he never told me-but he lied to me, and that was just as much of a betrayal. So to see Lauren saunter in, with Dave's arm wrapped around her, I had to admit that hurt.

I was so involved with my own pain that I didn't even realize what David was looking at with so much lust until I turned around to see Bella behind me. I can still feel my chest growl when I think about the look in David's eyes: he was imagining her naked. I have known him long enough to recognize that look-it was the same way he used to look at Lauren. It irritated me when he looked at Lauren like that, but I never felt the urge to jump and strangle him as I did last night.

Then when Lauren started to laugh at Bella about high school, I could feel my stomach turn. Why did Lauren have to bring all that up again? I could see Bella squirm uncomfortably behind me. I think if I hadn't wrapped my arm around her, she would have run. But I would not let her leave this time. No, this time I was going to stand up for her, this time I was going to make it right.

And I did. I was finally able to prove to Bella, to myself, that I am a better person and I can be there for her.

I smiled as I thought back to Bella's rant. It was obvious she had held those feelings in for a very long time. I could feel the weight being lifted off of her with each word she spoke. She was finally able to fight back against Lauren and show everyone the life she made for herself.

But Bella wasn't the only one to show case all the good in her life. So much has changed in my life for the better, and I was glad for the opportunity to show off a little bit. I had more money now then I made in a year at my old job, I had the most amazing friends that anyone could have wished for, and I had been able to make amends for the damage I caused in my past; but I knew I was missing something.

I could sit here and lie to myself all I wanted, but at the end of the day I knew exactly what it missing. I want what Jasper and Alice have; what Emmett and Rosalie have. I want love. But not the kind of love I thought I had with Lauren; I want the real kind, the kind that inspires the best of songs, the truest of stories, and the deepest of paintings.

Sure, I'm a guy, and that is not the cool thing for guys to be pining over, but I was raised with parents who were just as in love as the day they first met each other. I was brought up to believe that love is the one thing worth living for, the one thing that as long as you have it, will make your life all the better. I wasted enough time with Lauren. I am ready for that life-altering love now.

The only thing that I feared was the knowing part. How do people know when they are with the person they were meant to be with?

I asked Jasper once how he knew that Alice was the one. All he did was shrug and say, "I know."

Although a part of me had always known that Lauren was not the one, at a certain point I convinced myself she was; I thought I just "knew."

I rolled off my bed with a heavy sigh. I didn't want to think of such a depressing topic this early in the morning.

Even after my shower, and getting ready for my day, I was still in a weird mood. I needed get my mind off the topic; I need someone to distract me.

Right as I thought that, I heard a noise that sounded like someone tripping. _Bella,_ I felt myself smile. She could always make me feel better, even if by only being in the same room.

"Shit, shit, shit," I could hear her chant as I opened the door. Bella was kneeling on the floor over a box of doughnuts, the corner of the box however, looked like it was crushed by her landing. "Oh no," she sighed lifting the box to see a red liquid oozing out of the side.

"What did you trip over this time?" I asked while kneeling next to her.

"I'm pretty sure there was a very large patch of air in my way," Bella frowned, heading to the kitchen for napkins.

"I have heard that oxygen can be bulky," I laughed. "So why the doughnuts this morning?"

"I was in the mood for doughnuts," Bella shrugged. "The last time we had a run in with those people, well it was just Tom, but anyway we got doughnuts afterwards. I thought it was fitting."

I leaned over and grabbed a chocolate covered one. "So whenever we have a run in, we get doughnuts?"

"Well, don't you want to wallow again?" although Bella sounded light and playful, I could tell she was really asking me how I was doing.

"Nope," I smiled. "No need to wallow."

Bella's smile grew as she grabbed a glazed doughnut. "Well, cheers to that!" She lifted her doughnut in the air as if she were giving a toast.

"Why are you up so early?" I asked through a mouthful.

"Alice called. She was really excited about something." Bella narrowed her eyes at me, "Do you know something that you need to tell me?"

"I hid one little thing from you…"

"My best friend getting married is not a little thing!" Bella yelled in mock anger.

"You're going to hold that against me for the rest of my life, aren't you?" I asked with a sigh.

"You know it," Bella grinned as she nibbled on her doughnut.

"I'm a total jerk in high school, and you forgive me, but I neglect to tell you something and I am going to be persecuted for the rest of my life?" I shook my head with a smile. "You are truly absurd."

Bella laughed while her cell started to ring. She smiled when she saw the caller ID. "Hey, Alice… yep, he's right here… okay, hold on." Bella pushed the speaker button on her phone and placed it on the counter. "Alright we can both hear."

"Perfect!" I heard Alice sing. "So everyone is on."

"Hey Bella, Edward," Rose called. "How are you guys this morning?"

"Bella crushed some doughnuts," I answered quickly.

Emmett's booming laugh could be heard in the background. "Part of me wants to laugh at you Bella, but the other part is horrified that you massacred such a perfectly good pastry!"

"It was only one doughnut," Bella paused to glare at me. "And I'll save it for you if you want Emmett."

"Oh cool!" Emmett cheered. "I'll come over right now…"

"Hey I called for this conference for a reason here!" Alice yelled.

"It's okay, honey," I heard Jasper croon. "They got it out of their system."

"Sorry Alice, we'll be good," Emmett moped.

"Thank you." Alice took a deep breath. "So, I have some very exciting news! One of my clients it good friends with Alexandra Bushier, you know the heiress to some oil thing."

"She isn't just some heiress, her family is in the top ten of the richest in the world," Bella gasped. "They're like royalty, especially here in Seattle."

"Yeah, they are known for their extravagant parties," Rose added.

"Yep, and I got us all invited for this year's Halloween party!" Alice cried.

"All of us?" Rose gaped. "As in all six of us?"

"Yes, sir."

"But how did you do that?" I could practically picture Rosalie shaking her head in disbelief. "Whenever they hand out an invite, it's you and a plus one; that's it – no more."

"That is how it was at first," Alice admitted. "But then I started talking about my dear friend Emmett Cullen, son of Carlisle Cullen, and she told me to extend an invite to him, and a plus one as well, because the Cullen's are such nice people. Then I explained how you are his girlfriend Rose, and how you also work at Cullen Agencies, and how you are Isabella Swan's agent and good friend to you and myself. So she told me to extend my offer to you Bella, only without the plus one."

"So that leaves me out," I laughed. "Thanks Alice.

"Didn't I just say I got us all invited?" Alice huffed. "With you, I explained how you were all of our friend, and Emmett's new project, but she was still a little iffy about giving out another invitation, so I just told her to Google you."

"I'm Google-able?" I blinked.

"Oh right, I forgot to tell you," Emmett interrupted. "We just got your website up and running. It just a basic bio, and a couple of your pieces playing in the background, but you are up there."

"Are you telling me that you haven't tried to Google yourself?" Jasper asked.

"I Google myself all the time," Alice chimed.

"Ha-ha, that is because Jasper can't do the job right!" Emmett laughed.

"Did Emmett just turn the term 'Google-ing yourself' into something dirty?" Bella giggled.

"What can't Emmett turn into something dirty?" Rose sighed. "Remember when he went through that whole 'want to put a ring around my rosy?' phase?"

"I don't think it was as bad as 'want to duck, duck, duck my goose?'" Bella laughed.

"And I do not need to Google myself," Alice spoke up.

"Thank you," Jasper sounded very proud.

"I only Google myself when Jasper is out of town, and even then we are on the phone together so it really counts as another win for him…"

We all laughed as we heard muffling noises. "Jasper get you hand off my mouth!"

"Alice," Jasper hissed. "We don't need to go telling them our personal life."

"Oh, we already know all about your sex life 'Captain' Whitlock!" Rose laughed, which caused the rest of us to erupt into laughter as well.

"So how did Google-ing me help get me an invitation?" I asked through the laughter.

"Well she saw your picture and really didn't need any more convincing," Alice answered.

"Wow, I feel like a piece of meat."

"Shut up, you love it," Bella giggled. "So the party is going to be on Halloween night, I suppose?"

"Yep, but there is a bit of a twist this year," Alice paused for dramatic effect. "It is a masquerade theme."

"So it's a masquerade ball?" Rose asked. "We don't even get to dress up?"

"No we still have to wear a Halloween costume, only you absolutely have to have a mask, otherwise you are not allowed inside."

"So this means that we are going shopping, aren't we?" Bella grimaced.

"You know it!" Rose and Alice yelled together.

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I was having a hard time trying to figure out what I wanted to be. Emmett and I were hanging out at Jasper's place while the girls went out shopping. We were throwing around ideas of what our costumes could be. Emmett was convinced that he could talk Rose into being a socket costume, and he could be a plug.

Right as I was voicing my idea of being the joker from Batman The Dark Knight, Alice jumped from the bedroom screaming at me not to even dare think about being the joker. Apparently the shopping trip had been postponed an hour so she heard our conversation.

After some mild complaints on my side, Alice informed us that she had planned out what all of our costumes were going to be, and that only she was going to know what we all were, and that on the actual day we are all going to get dressed up separately, meet at the party, and we would have to find the girls.

Emmett made the fatal mistake of asking why we had to do this.

"To make the night more interesting!" Alice yelled before leaving the apartment.

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"Why is it that we are not allowed to know what we are, until the day of the party?" Emmett asked as we waited for Alice to show up with our costumes.

"Because she likes the dramatic effect," Jasper sighed.

"What I want to know is why she told me that she was going to have to spend a couple hours on my hair," I complained while jumping onto Jasper's couch.

It was only 2 in the afternoon, and Alice told us that she would come over to help get us get ready, or at least that is what she told me.

"Sorry I'm late!" Alice whooshed into the apartment with large plastic bag covering our clothes. "I had to buy some extra gel," she looked over at me. "I don't think one jar will be enough."

"So what are we going to be?" Emmett asked, jumping from the couch like an eager little boy.

"You, Emmett," Alice pulled out the middle bag. "Are going to be a convict."

Emmett unzipped the bag to reveal a bright orange jump suit with attachable plastic ball and chain. "This is awesome," Emmett whispered. "That means Rose is going to be a sexy cop!" Emmett swirled around to face Alice. "Am I right?"

"No comment." Alice grabbed that top bag and handed it to Jasper. "You my dear are going to be a 70's disco king. Think Saturday Night Fever."

I could see while bell-bottom pants with a matching white jacket, and a black shirt with a cuff around the sleeve of the white jacket.

"So will you be my disco queen?" Jasper leaned in to give her a quick kiss.

"You will find out tonight," Alice gave him a responding peck on the lips. "Now, for you, Edward, it was kind of hard figuring out what I wanted you to be, but once I picked out what Bella was going to be it was only a quick link to you; I mean all the leather. Oops!" Alice gasped. "I already said too much. But anyway, you are going to be Danny Zucco, from Grease."

I laughed as I looked at the leather jacket, tight black jeans, and the tight white top. So if I was Danny, then Alice probably made Bella into Sandy. Well, I hope Bella didn't mind us having coordinating costumes.

"So that is why you need all that gel," I laughed as realization hit. "You need to style my hair like a greaser."

"That damn hair of yours is going to listen whether it likes it, or not!" Alice threatened as she grabbed the bag full of products and headed to the bathroom, waving her hand for me to follow.

I now understand why Bella hates it when Alice gets her ready. I'm a guy, and I have a pretty high tolerance for pain, but this was just torture! She combed the gel into my hair first, and then began to twist and pull while adding even more product.

"Will you calm down?" Alice sighed. "Even Bella doesn't complain as much as you!"

"My hair was not made to look like this Alice," I whined through gritted teeth and my eyes closed.

"Oh yeah, well take a look at that and tell me what your hair can do!"

I opened my eyes to see my hair perfectly styled as to how a greaser would wear it, even with the perfect little curly-que at the front. It looked odd with my modern day t-shirt and blue jeans, but once I put on my outfit I knew that I would look like Danny. Wait… I would look just like him, but Danny had black hair…

"Oh shit!" I yelled. "What did you do to my hair? It's black!" Panic swept through me as I stared at myself in the mirror. I liked my hair, it was a copper-like color, and it made me feel different.

"Calm down," Alice waved her hand as if blowing off my panic. "It is just a temporary dye; it'll fade away when you wash it."

"But I like my hair how it normally is," I pouted.

"Oh hush, and don't you dare touch it!" Alice instructed as I followed her to the living room where Jasper and Emmett were sitting on the couch.

"Holy crap!" Emmett exclaimed. "What the hell happened to your hair?"

"Alice styled it," I mumbled.

"No, I think Emmett is talking about the color," Jasper gaped as he continued to stare at my hair. "You look completely different."

"Seriously," Emmett nodded. "Once you put on your costume, and mask, I would never recognize you."

"Well at least everyone knows what I am then," I laughed.

"Not everyone," Alice chipped in. "Rose and Bella still do not know who you are going to be, or the rest of you guys for that matter."

"Yeah, but how much do you want to bet that Rose is a cop, you will be a disco queen, and Bella will be Sandy?" I rolled my eyes. "It is not that hard to guess."

"Well you will just have to find her tonight then," Alice shrugged. "I'm off. I left instructions to the mansion on the counter, we will be there at 10 pm sharp, and it's your guys' mission to find us." Alice gave Jasper a quick kiss. "I'll see you guys tonight!"

Emmett was right; I looked completely different with my outfit and mask. The clothes were not my style, and I wasn't quite sure how to feel when I squeezed my way into these very skinny jeans. How did the rock stars do it? I didn't mind the white shirt; it clung to me tight enough to be able to tell I worked out. But I had to admit that the leather jacket was my favorite; I would have to wear it after Halloween.

My mask was a simple black, metallic-like, and it covered the top half of my face, just barely concealing my nose. It was cool- it reminded me of like a supper hero's mask.

My favorite was Emmett's mask. It was also a plain black mask made out of a simple material but only covered his eyes. It was the type of mask that criminals in cartoons wore.

Jasper's mask was a more classic Venetian type mask with gold edges surrounding the black velvety material. It meshed well with his disco outfit. I had to admit, Alice knew what she was doing.

The mansion where the party was being held was outside of Seattle, so we had a bit of a drive. I wasn't paying too much attention to what Emmett and Jasper were thinking; I was too distracted in my own thoughts; I hoped I would be able to recognize Bella.

The mansion was huge, and decorated to give it a gothic feel. As I walked in, I wondered why Alice's client was so reluctant to give out invitations, it looked like everyone in Seattle was here. The doors opened up to a very grand entryway that had fog coating the floor, giving it an eerie, mysterious feel. I followed Emmett and Jasper to the next room where, luckily, the bar was located.

I felt my heart drop when I walked into the room, as I spotted at least five Sandy's. They all looked identical with their tight black spandex pants, and a matching off-the-shoulder spandex top with a big blond curly wig all with similar black masks. This was going to be a little difficult.

About 20 minutes went by with all of us just looking at the costumes. When did Halloween become such a sexual holiday? It might have been because of the skimpy outfits, or the dimly lit room with fog covering the floor and the moon shining in from the large windows showing the patio, but everything just felt sexier.

"Found her!" Emmett cheered while quickly walking to the entryway of the room.

Wow, Rose definitely knew how to dress up like a sexy cop. She had on a black vest like top which was cut off showing her toned stomach. The vest only had two buttons buttoned, which made Emmett a very happy boy. She also had on a very short mini skirt with a leather belt, and what looked like to be real handcuffs hooked to her belt buckle.

Rose smiled up from under her aviator sunglasses (which she used as her mask and old school police like hat, as Emmett ran up to her to give her a big kiss. I had a feeling that those handcuffs were going to come into play for them later tonight.

"Well that is one out of three," I laughed.

"Sorry," Jasper sighed. "I just found my disco queen."

I couldn't see Alice at first, but after some of the crowd moved I could clearly see her outfit. She had on a short, light purple, halter-top dress that had yellow and green prints of flowers. The dress matched perfectly with her purple and white mask. I laughed as I saw the white headband and matching white boots.

I figured I'd better go find Bella; she was obviously alone now, and if she was dressed in one of those Sandy outfits, then some jerk off was going to be hitting on her.

It wasn't that hard to make my way through the crowd-everyone had managed to find his or her hookup of the night and were trying to find a dark place to sneak off to. I saw a couple of Sandy's making out with some guys, and hoped they were not Bella.

I found my way into the library and was in awe with how large it was. This room was on the corner of the house, and had more of a round shape to it with the walls covered up by shelves and shelves of books. On the right side of the room however, there were large glass French doors that lead to a patio that connected with the room I just came from.

Standing directly ahead of me, not to my surprise, was "Sandy" looking at the old books. I quietly walked up behind her, and lowered my mouth to her ear.

"Fancy seeing you here." I laughed as Bella jumped and gasped while quickly turning around to see who had snuck up on her.

I was surprised that she didn't fall down with those high heals she was wearing. Alice probably made her practice walking in them.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," I smiled. "Funny how we have matching outfits, huh?"

Bella licked her lips, as she looked me up and down. "Very funny." She must have been drinking, that was the only explanation as to why she would have looked at me like that; plus her voice sounded slightly lower and hoarse from alcohol.

"So why are you in the library when there is a perfectly good party going on outside?" I asked.

"I wanted to find someplace quiet," Bella shrugged, and then she smirked up at me. "I was hoping someone would follow me in here."

What did she mean by that?

Bella took a step closer, causing me to lean against the big wooden desk that sat behind me. I was too stunned to understand what she was doing. My brain registered her actions, but my body was frozen in place.

Slowly and sensually, Bella trailed her hand from my shoulder, down my chest, to rest at the top of my jeans so she could pull my body closer to hers. I could barely see her eyes, it was so dark in here; after all the only thing giving off light was the moon coming from the balcony.

With that thought I quickly glanced over at the balcony and literally stopped breathing. I saw the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

She was sitting on the edge of the balcony looking up to the sky. I was not sure what her costume was, but it didn't matter.

She had on a deep rich blue corset on that had black lace that outlined web like designs. The blue looked perfect on her porcelain skin that glowed in the moonlight; her dark brown hair, which was formed into loose curls, was pinned to the top of her head and formed a messy bun with strands falling down into her fair face. I could not see what she looked like under her silver mask, but I could tell she was beautiful.

My eyes traveled farther south and paused when I saw she had on very short black shorts that hugged her perfectly, with fishnet stockings underneath that disappeared in her thigh length leather boots. I needed to go to her. It was more then just her beauty; I could feel myself being pulled to her.

I looked back to Bella who was fiddling with the buttons to my jeans. I felt a pain in my heart; I had to stop her. I gently pushed her back, "Bella, what are you doing?"

"What?" she sounded very confused and very drunk.

"Look, you are probably going to regret this tomorrow," I tried to sound as nice a possible. "But you are very drunk right now. Look I'll take you home in a bit, Rose and Alice are in the room with the bar, go find them and I will meet up with you in a while; I have to go do something right now."

Bella took a few steps back from me. Although she had her mask on, I could tell she was glaring at me. "Whatever," she hissed as she stormed out of the room.

Any other time I would go after Bella and let her know that she had nothing to be embarrassed about, but I could not ignore this overwhelming feeling that pulled me to this woman. I needed to go to her.

Right as I opened the door she looked at me. I had to take a breath when I saw her deep chocolate eyes. It felt like the world had stopped. I couldn't hear the music anymore, nor could I feel the cold that the wind brought.

All there was, was her.

"Can I help you?" she asked, her voice was soft, yet firm.

"Sorry, but I saw you, and…" I paused, lost for words. "You were alone, I thought it was odd."

"So are you," she countered with a sly smile.

"True, but it doesn't make sense for a beautiful woman to be alone." I know it sounded a little cheesy, but what I said was true.

I could see a blush from underneath her mask, "Do you use those lines on all the girls?"

"No," I laughed. "Look, I just came out here to talk."

She looked at me with an expression that I couldn't read, stupid mask. "Alright, talk."

"What are you supposed to be?" I asked as I leaned up against the balcony beside her.

She looked down at her lap as if she were embarrassed. "I'm supposed to be a vampire. My friend was the one who dressed me up, she said that vampires don't look like the vampires in movies, and instead they are meant to be… alluring."

"Well, I think you have accomplished that," I grinned.

"Well, what about you," she folded her arms. "You are obviously Danny Zucco, but who dresses up like Danny without a Sandy?"

"My friend is dressed as Sandy, but she is off with our other friends," I spoke quickly. "Who are you here with?"

"My friends," she laughed quietly. "I am supposed to be looking for one of them right now."

"Well it looks like you are doing a great job," I laughed with her.

"I did try to look, but it was just so crowded and that fog was not helping me…"

I raised an eyebrow when she didn't finish her sentence.

"I kept tripping over things," she rolled her eyes. "People just leave their bottles on the floor, and that stupid fog was covering it up."

"A really good friend of mine is also very clumsy," I felt awful thinking about Bella, and how I had just pushed her off of me and quickly sent her away so I could be with this woman. But it just felt so comfortable to sit here with her, and just talk.

"I never said I was clumsy," she pouted, making her red lips look even fuller.

"I'm sorry, that is my mistake."

We continued to talk for quite some time about the costumes here, how people never did the joke costumes anymore, or at least at places like these.

"It sucks because I want to dress up like something funny, and if I came in here as my own variation of the bride of Frankenstein, then people would look at me like I was crazy," she huffed.

"And what is you variation of the bride of Frankenstein?" I looked at her with complete fascination.

"Well I always envisioned her as an intense roller derby chick," she smiled. "Like the kind that roller skates for competition."

I threw my head back and laughed, "It is probably the best idea I have ever heard. And what would Frankenstein be?"

"A hockey player, obviously," she smirked.

"Yes, obviously."

We fell into a comfortable silence as we looked up at the stars. I had yet to learn her name, but I found her mesmerizing.

After a few minutes I looked back at the stunning stranger beside me. "Dance with me."

"What?" she laughed uncomfortably.

"Dance with me," I repeated.

"To what, this music?" I could hear the music from inside the house. It was kind of music you grind to in a club.

"No, here." I held out my hand to her. I waited with baited breath as she quickly debated on whether or not to dance. After a quick decision she grabbed it.

I held onto her right hand, and pulled her closer to me with my right hand on her waist. She took a deep breath as if to breathe me in then sighed as she relaxed her head on my chest.

Although the loud base of the music played through the doors, I danced to another melody, one that only I could hear.

I looked down and breathed her in, she smelt familiar, like strawberries and freesia.

She looked up at me, and tried to stifle a gasp.

"What is it?" I stopped dancing, but still held her close to me.

"Sorry," she bit her lip and looked away from me through nervousness. "But I just didn't realize you had green eyes."

"That's it?" I smiled.

"They're just," she paused to look up at me. "They're just…"

We were both leaning into each other, just a few more inches and I could taste her lips.

"There you guys are!" I heard Alice cry, making the mystery woman and I jump away from one another. "Good, I'm glad you guys found each other, I was starting to get worried." She skipped over to us with a wide smile on her face.

What was she talking about? I sent Bella to her almost an hour ago.

"Alice, what do you mean found each other?" the woman asked beside me. How did she know Alice? Was this the client Alice was talking about?

"You guys don't know?" Alice's smile faltered for a moment before growing even wider. "Who do you think that is?" she asked, indicating me.

"How am I supposed to know?" the mystery woman started to sound irritated.

"And what about you Danny?" Alice had an evil look on her face. "Do you know who it is you have been dancing with?"

"Alice, will you just tell us?" I asked roughly.

"Fine," she looked over at me, "You are Edward." She looked at the stranger, "And you are Bella."

"What?" Bella and I said in unison.

"How the hell is that possible?" I demanded. "I sent Bella to go look for you guys an hour ago."

"What was that person's costume?" Alice asked.

"Sandy, just like you told me-"

She cut me off before I could go any farther. "Not true. All I said was that you two would be matching." She eyed the both of us, "And with all that leather I would say you guys match. You are the one who assumed Bella was going to dress up as Sandy."

"You didn't tell me you died his hair!" Bella complained. "I've been looking for someone with bronze-colored hair."

"Well you guys found each other, so let's just stop complaining," Alice started to walk back to the entrance. "Now come on, everyone is waiting for us."

It was Bella? This incredible stranger who I was drawn to and spent the last hour with? How did I not notice it before? Well I had assumed that that other person was Bella, so how could I have guessed that she was?

Well, then if that other woman was not Bella, then a complete stranger had been the one trying to molest me in the library.

I felt a surge of relief flood through me. At least that was one awkward situation that I wouldn't have to deal with in the morning. Instead I would have another awkward situation that I was going to have to deal with right now.

Surely Bella knew that I almost kissed her, or that I was starting to lean in for a kiss. What would have happened if Alice had not shown up? If I had kissed her, and if she had responded, if I had tasted her, and if it had continued…?

No! I told myself. I cannot allow myself to think of Bella that way. Bella is Bella, sweet, perfect, my own personal angel Bella. And I am the leech, I am the leech, I am the leech.

_You are not a leech anymore,_ I heard a voice within me say.

Yeah, but what I did to her, I can never atone for myself.

_But you already did,_ countered the voice. _At the symphony, you stood up for Bella and, you showed her how much her friendship means to you._

I did stand up for Bella, and she seemed to truly recognize it.

_You are her equal now! You earn your money, you help her, and you have redeemed yourself._

I could never truly be her equal though; she was just too good.

_But this is as close as you can get to being her equal, and it's pretty damn close._

"Hey Edward," Bella's voice brought me out of my trance. "It's kind of funny that you and I found each other like that without even thinking."

"I honestly thought I already found you," I shook my head.

We walked up to the bar and ordered our drinks. "Where did you find her, and why did you think it was me?"

"Well for starters I thought you were dressed like Sandy. I don't understand Alice and her cryptic ways." I would have to ask Alice about that later. "And as for the where and why I thought she was you, it is a combination answer: I found her in the library."

Bella laughed almost causing her to spill her drink. "I was in there for a little bit, but the patio looked very nice."

"Next year we pick our own costumes and we tell each other," I grinned.

"Here, here!" Bella lifted her glass before taking another drink. "And something that is not as constricting."

"How about roller derby bride of Frankenstein and hockey player Frankenstein?" I offered.

"Deal!" Bella chuckled as she grabbed my hand and lead me to the rest of our friends.

My eyes wandered her body while I was dragged behind her. A part of me wanted to stop what I was doing and go punch myself in my gut, but a small piece of me remembered my earlier thoughts; I was her equal now.

So what did that mean? Could I now allow myself to even remotely think of Bella in a way that could possibly be more then friends?

Yes, I think I could.

**Yeah, so I definitely want to know how long you guys thought that "Sandy" was Bella. Maybe you guys guessed it, or maybe not, EITHER WAY I would definitely want to know.**

**Oh before you all ask, or Google (and not in the dirty way) that oil heiress, yep I made her up.**

**Hehe, Googeling yourself.**

**INCASE you missed it. I have the links to the pictures on my page AND a contest/ plea for help thing I'm doing. Please go check it out.**

**Next chapter is called: _Andrew #2_**

**And let me just say, he is based on a real guy, who I call Andrew #2. haha The next chapter will be in Bella's POV **


	13. Andrew 2

**I love you guys, and I loved how everyone commented on how long it took before they realized that Bella was not Bella. But is seemed like almost everyone had a second of "WHAT?" then "Ohhhh" you guys crack me up**

**Sorry this chap late guys, but like I told my betas, this chap was hard to write because this is the last chapter of lead up!! Wooop, that is a long build up. But I promise next chapter will show the plot of where I am heading with this.**

**Another thing I would like to say is that I am bummed out that no one sent me a summary thing, please, pretty please. So go back to my profile and check it out. And make me happy.**

**(Shout out to my cousin Tonie, the only one in my family to be readying this. LOVE YA)**

**My betas are awesome. Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter they are both way cool for putting up with me. :)**

**I do not own Twilight.**

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Chapter 13- Andrew #2

My jeans didn't feel right. I've worn them a dozen times, but at this moment I didn't feel comfortable in them. Turning so my side was to the mirror, I looked at my profile. No, it didn't look too tight, or too loose. My black skinny jeans looked the same as they always did. I fidgeted in my green sweater - it felt too low. Although realistically speaking, it went up to just bellow my throat.

It was my hair, that's what was off today; it felt stringy and flat, and... no it looked pretty damn good today. Something was off… I was off. I know what's off. I was avoiding going out there, Edward was out there. Why was I being weird? Nothing happened.

I could feel my cheeks burn at the thought of what happened last Friday. Alice told us her plan of picking out everyone's outfit and all of us trying to find each other. Rose was none too excited about it at first, but once she saw the costume that Alice picked out for her, she became a very willing participate.

I easily pieced together what Jasper and Emmett were going to be, just by what Alice and Rose's costumes were, but when I saw my outfit I was stumped on what Edward was going to be.

The whole night I was looking for someone with messy bronze colored hair, but I couldn't find anything close to that. Yeah, because Alice hid him, I snorted. From the moment I stepped into the mansion it was like every drunken idiot was trying to get with me. I had told Alice that my costume was a bad idea - even if I did look hot.

I'm not even sure if I spent more then a half hour mingling before I made my way to the patio. It really was a beautiful night, and since we were far away from the city I could see even more stars out here. That was one thing that I missed about living in Forks - being able to see all the stars.

That was when I heard the door open. At first I thought he was just another pig, but then we started talking and… I felt myself just sigh again at the thought of the ease of the conversation. Although I do feel pretty stupid for not recognizing his voice, I think I was just too caught up in the night.

Then we started dancing and I don't think I have ever felt more content in my life; well I did one other time - my birthday. But at the time there was nothing in my mind except the warmth of his arms, the strength of his hold, and the feel of his breath. I remember when I looked up and felt an electric shock go through my body at just the sight of his eyes. They reminded me of someone, only with the stranger's sweet breath brushing against my face I couldn't remember. All I knew was his eyes, his hold, his lips that were just inches from mine…

Then Alice showed up, and revealed both of our identities. I was surprised, shocked, embarrassed, and most of all: curious. What if we had kissed? Would it have been just a kiss? When would we realize who we were, and would we keep going?

But then I felt insecurity lurch in my stomach. What if he wasn't going to kiss me? I could have had something in my eye and was going to get it out. What if I was the one leaning in and he felt obligated to kiss the pathetic girl he was entertaining?

All of those doubts had overtaken me as I walked back into the party with Edward. So what did I do? I pretended that nothing happened, and it seemed that Edward was doing the same. The night went on, we laughed, we joked, and everything seemed to be fine. At least until we got back to the apartment. I practically ran to my room, not giving Edward a chance to say anything.

The next morning I decided to just suck it up and go out there and pretend nothing happened like a normal person. But I chickened out and made up some story that I had to go out with Alice that day. Alice however was busy along with Rose, so I ended up spending the day just walking around the city.

On Sunday I went to the gym, went grocery shopping, and just about every other little errand that I could run. It might have been a tad bit obvious that I was avoiding him. But luckily Edward had his work to fall back on. I could hear him at the piano, just pressing notes together, seeing what they sounded like; never really coming up with a tune.

So here I was, Monday morning, fiddling with my outfit knowing that no matter what I did, it just wasn't going to look right- or I was just not going to feel right. At least I had an excuse for where I was going this morning. Rose called me last night saying that she wanted to go over something with me, and that Alice had something that all of us needed to talk about.

With one last breath, I stepped out of my room and saw Edward sitting on the couch wearing just a dark blue T-shirt and jeans. I gave him a smile hopping that it didn't look forced.

"You have that meeting with the girls today?" Edward asked sounding casual as ever. So it probably was all in my head.

"That I do," I sighed. "Why, what's up?"

"Nothing," Edward shrugged. "I'm making spaghetti for dinner tonight and I was wondering if you wanted me to wait up for you."

"And miss out on your cooking," I laughed. "Never! This is what, the third time you've cooked since you moved in?"

"Hey, my spaghetti is legendary," Edward pouted.

"And so is the mess, which I end up cleaning," I grabbed my coat. "I'll be here around five!"

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I arrived at the Rose's office before Alice, and Rose reassured me that Alice did not need to be there for what we were going to talk about. Rosalie was in a dark blue work dress, making her eyes shine.

"Oh Bella," Rose stared. "You are not going to like this."

I felt my throat close up. "Are you going to let me go?"

"God no!" Rose laughed. "Like Carlisle would ever give you up - you are one of our top sellers." I felt myself relax at her words. "No, what I want to talk to you about, Bella, is that you have not been on any dates for quite a while."

I felt myself stiffen again.

"It is all a matter of image, and I need to keep putting you out there." Rose walked to her filing cabinet and pulled out a sheet of paper which looked like it had list of names on it. "Now I have circled some guys that I think would be a good choice, and you are going to have to be a little open minded here…"

"No!" I yelled. "The last time I went on a date with a guy you picked out I ended up hiding out in the bathroom." I reached over and grabbed the list. "I pick for now own."

"But Bella, you are never going to pick someone out in time!" Rose leaned back in her chair and folded her arms.

"I'll pick someone out for you by the end of the night and if this date turns out to be a dud, then it will be on me." I folded my arms as well and matched her stare.

After a minute Rose let out a sigh and rolled her arms. "Fine."

We went on to talk about my latest story and ways to promote it; she told me she was talking to Cosmo magazine about me doing an interview with them, and being the on the cover.

"Of course it would be the February issue, so you would have to do it in January," Rose shuffled through her papers. "You would be up for that wouldn't you?"

"How can I say no?" Really, who could say no to Cosmo? It was like some type of girl law.

"Say no to what?" Alice's high voice called from the door.

"Bella might do Cosmo," Rose leaned across her desk to give her a hug. "The February issue."

"No way!" Alice gasped as she gave me a hug as well. "That is so cool! I want to go."

"Sure," I shrugged. I would probably need someone with me when I went anyways. "So what did you want to talk about?"

Alice nodded, her face becoming uncharacteristically serious. "Right, we should get down to business." She opened the large brown bag that was hanging off her shoulder, taking out a simple white notebook.

"Oh cool you already started one!" Rose leaned closer to Alice, her eyes wide.

"Started what?" I asked as I watched Alice carefully place the notebook on the desk.

Alice laughed as she ran her hand over the edges of the notebook. "Oh Bella. Why am I not surprised that you don't know what it is?" Alice looked at me with a small smile, "This is my wedding notebook."

"Ok…"

"Basically this is everything I want for my wedding," Alice opened the planner and started to flip through it. "Even though my sister was a total bridezilla for her wedding, Cynthia actually helped me by being the crazy, annoying little sister that she is; it gave me great ideas on what I want to do."

Alice started to show pictures of very pretty pink flowers, "These are the flowers I want, so this means that I will have to have a late spring/early summer wedding, so I was thinking late May. I don't want it interfering with Edward's birthday. It's in June right?"

"Yep, June 20th" I nodded. "But Alice, I don't think Edward would mind having your wedding in the same month of his birthday."

Alice gave me a smile as if I was missing something. "Allow me to rephrase." She cleared her throat. "I don't want his birthday interfering with my wedding."

"Meaning she wants all the attention on her," Rose laughed.

"Well, obviously!"

I had to laugh with how serious Alice sounded, and then another wave of laughter hit me when I realized she was serious.

"Anyway," Alice spoke loudly over my laughter. "We need to talk about something very serious right now… maid of honor."

"But isn't Cynthia going to be your maid of honor?" I asked. Although I was an only child, I'm pretty sure that was the kind of thing that sisters do.

"Yeah right," snorted Alice. "I wasn't her maid of honor, and I am way closer to the both of you than her." Alice waved her hand around. "No, I want one of you to be my maid of honor."

Crap, this felt like junior high when everyone got picked for dodge-ball. But realistically speaking, Rose and Alice had been friends longer than Alice and I since they had gone to college together. So it makes sense that Rose would be her maid of honor. _Good just reason it out now, so then when Alice says it you won't get all upset_.

"So I was thinking we could do a circle, if you guys don't mind," I heard Alice say.

I looked up from my lap and saw Rose nodding in agreement. "What do you mean do a circle?"

"Well, I certainly can't just pick between you two and just leave the other one without being a maid of honor, and there are three of us so it's perfect. So it can either be you are my maid of honor, I'll be Rose's, then she would be yours; or Rose will be mine, I'll be yours, and then you will be Rose's."

I bit my lip as I thought this over; I felt the smile spread over my face. "That's perfect!"

"Now the question is who is going to be whose?" Alice leaned back in her chair.

I thought about whose maid of honor I would want to be. With Rose she would probably want to do everything for herself, leaving me to just do the smaller things. With Alice… or dear God, Alice would completely abuse me as Bella Barbie, and she would probably have me do real wedding work.

I gulped.

Alice chuckled while looking from me to Rose, "So you probably both have thought the same thing." Alice looked at Rose, "You are thinking that if I was your maid of honor, then I would totally try to take over; which probably I would." Then she smiled at me, "And by the look of horror you are probably thinking about what I would have you do as my maid of honor, and Rose would probably be able to handle it better."

"So it's agreed?" Rose asked while looking at Alice. "I'll be your maid of honor, you'll be Bella's, and Bella will be mine?"

"That is the plan," Alice nodded. "Are you cool with that Bella?"

"No," I shook my head. "It's not fair to you, Alice; I'm not getting married."

"Yes you will," Alice stated simply.

I rolled my eyes, "Really, to who then?"

Alice smiled a knowing smile, "You'll find out soon enough."

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We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about Alice's wedding, and I had to admit that I was getting excited while talking to them about it. I had only been to my mom and Phil's wedding, and that was just a small court house ceremony. But as the conversation went on, I was starting to realize just how much went into a wedding, and apparently Alice wanted to have a large one.

I thought six months was plenty of time to put this all together, but when I shared that thought, Alice and Rose looked at me as if I were crazy. So I kept my thoughts to myself for the majority of the conversation, and I didn't mind. To see Alice this excited, and this happy - I would be willing to sit through a million of these conversations, which looked like what was going to happen.

It was 5:15 as I opened the door to my apartment and was met by the aroma of pasta, tomato sauce, and several other spices. I could hear Edward in the kitchen lifting the lid off a pot, then setting it back down. I must admit that I was impressed when I walked into the kitchen it looked like everything was under control.

"Aww, perfect. You're just in time," Edward lifted a spoon from the sauce pan to taste the contents. "I think I have outdone myself!"

I leaned over the pan and took a big whiff, "It smells like you have mastered the fine art of spaghetti."

"You know what," Edward folded his arms and gave me a stern look. "Maybe I won't let you eat my dinner."

"I'm just teasing," I laughed. "It looks and smells great. Thank you for cooking."

We decided to just eat on the couch since there was a new episode of Mythbusters on that night and the nerds in both of us just could not miss it.

"So why did the girls call you into the office today?" Edward asked when a commercial came on.

"We decided who was going to be whose maid of honor." I sat my plate on the coffee table.

Edward raised an eyebrow, "Oh, Alice chose one of you?"

"Not so much as chose, but assigned." I laughed at Edward's confused expression. "I'm going to be Rose's maid of honor, Rose will be Alice's, and Alice will be mine."

"I didn't know Rose was engaged," an amused smile spread on Edward's lips. "And I had no idea you are engaged; may I ask to whom?"

I rolled my eyes. "I am not engaged and neither is Rose." I felt myself blush- I already had a maid of honor, and yet no groom; I hear those are kind of important in a wedding.

"It's a girl thing…" I tried to explain.

"I see," Edward continued to smile his stupid smile.

"I feel bad for Alice though," I confided.

Edward's amused smile quickly faded, replaced with concern, "Why?"

"It's just…" I sighed. "I believe it is every girl's dream to be the maid of honor for your best friend's wedding, and I wish everyone had the chance at least once."

"Alright," Edward nodded slowly. "So, what is the problem?"

"So, I'm not getting married any time soon, and what happens if I never do? Then Alice will never get to be a maid of honor." I took a deep breath. "It sounds stupid, I know, but I feel like now I have this pressure on me."

Edward was quiet in thought for a few seconds. "I can understand the pressure to get married. It doesn't matter where it is coming from, or how it's getting to you; but it is not a pleasant feeling. Just try- and I know how hard it can be- but try to ignore that nagging feeling."

I was actually really comforted by what Edward told me. He had always found a way to relate to me, and if he couldn't he would let me talk, and then help me through what I was feeling. If he wasn't such a good pianist, I would say that he should become a psychiatrist.

After the show I brought my bag over to look at the list Rose had gave me.

"What do you have there?" Edward asked while looking over my shoulder.

"This is a list of guys I can go on a date with," I explained. "Rose told me that it had been too long since my last date, and I demanded that I got to choose."

Edward took the paper from my hand and began to examine it for himself. "There are a lot of actors in this."

"Great, just what I need; another Newton."

"Wait!" Edward yelled. "No way, no way, no way!" Edward stood up, an excited smile on his face, and his hands clutching onto the paper. "This is so fucking awesome!"

This must be big; Edward didn't curse often. "Him," he shoved the paper in my face, a finger pointing to a name. "I still get to pick a guy for you to go out with, and I choose him!"

Once I focused my vision on the name I read it out loud. "Andrew Johnson?"

"Yep, Andrew Johnson, player number 2, the new starting quarterback for the Mountain Lions!" Edward looked as giddy as a school girl. "You have to bring him here, he needs to pick you up here, and I have to meet him!"

I could barely get a word out! I knew that the Mountain Lions were one of his favorite teams, but damn. I guess a guy will always be a guy.

"Alright, I'll go," I breathed, still stunned. "I'll go call Rose right now."

"Bella, you don't understand, this guy is going to become legendary in the world of NFL," Edward paused. "Do you think you can get me some free tickets?"

"And how am I supposed to do that?" I crossed my arms.

"I don't know, flirt with him?"

"Are you actually asking me to flirt with this guy so I can get you some free tickets which you could easily buy?" I raised one eyebrow.

Edward shifted in his place, "Well, I thought it would be cooler to say that Andrew Johnson got them for me."

"I cannot believe you are pimping me out for tickets," I mumbled.

That certainly got Edward's attention, "I didn't mean… you're not a prostitute…" Edward hung his head. "I'm sorry."

"I'm just joking Edward," when he looked at me I gave him a reassuring smile.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It continued to amaze me how quickly everything gets done. When I called Rose to tell her who Edward's pick was around 8 pm, by 10 she had everything set up for the next day. Apparently he was over in Portland right now doing some kind of fundraiser, so I was not too far out of the way.

Rose told me that while she was talking to him over the phone he seemed really excited, and said that he had plans canceled for the next day, leaving him free. "It was meant to be," Rose told me he said.

Luckily only Alice had time to come over to help me get ready; I did not want to have to put up with Emmett's and Jasper's crap. I wouldn't mind if Rose was here, but she had just signed on another person and was working late at the office.

Edward was in his room getting ready to meet Andrew, and I swear that boy is more of a girl then I am sometimes; which either says something about him, or says something about me.

I looked at my hip-hugging black dress-up slacks and my off the shoulder winter white sweater-top. My hair was up in a messy pony tail, yet still managed to look stylish. Alice, like always, was amazing.

"I know," Alice walked up behind me, patted at my shoulder and looked at our reflections from my mirror. "I'm good."

"I didn't say anything," I eyed Alice with a smile.

"You didn't have to," Alice threw her head back in smugness. "I can see it in the way you were checking yourself out."

"Well what if I like to check myself out?" I asked, trying to keep a straight face. "I do hear I have a mighty fine ass." With that Alice and I busted out in laugher only to be interrupted by Edward knocking on my door.

He had on a dark pair of blue jeans, and a fall colored orange top. To anyone they would just look at this beautiful man, and think he was dressed for autumn, but I knew he was trying to subtly show his support for the Mountain Lions by wearing their colors.

"Do I look alright?" he asked, facing Alice. "I don't look like a desperate fan or anything?"

"I didn't know I would be dressing the both of you tonight," Alice smirked. "But unlike Bella-"

"Hey!" I interrupted.

"You actually have some sense of style," Alice finished.

Edward glowed. "Ok, well, I was thinking that when he gets here, you guys can hide out in here for a bit and I can just talk to him, if that's cool… please?"

It was cute seeing Edward all excited to meet his sports hero. "Sure," I nodded. "Would you like me to get some wine out for you guys, or should I just start up the fire and put on some music?" Edward glared at me before he walked out.

Alice and I laughed for a while, all the while listening as the doorbell rang, and the sound of conversation floated from the living room. I decided to wait for 20 minutes before making my appearance.

Andrew was tall, and built like a football player; he was not as big as Emmett but was still thicker than Edward. He had on blue dress pants, and a lighter blue button up top. Like Mike Newton, Andrew seemed to look like an All-American type of guy; blond hair, blue eyes, yet unlike Mike's childlike features, Andrew had a more masculine look about him.

I smiled at him, and gave him my hand to say hello. He, however, pulled me into a tight hug. "It is more than nice to meet you," Andrew pushed me away from him, but still had his hands on my shoulders. "You are far more beautiful than words have described you."

"Um… Thank you?"

He must have misread my confused expression as me holding back. Andrew brought be back into a tight hug. "I understand," he whispered in my ear. "You have probably been hurt in your life, but know that I will not do that to you- I will not hurt you."

Mouth open, I looked over at Edward and Alice, who stood aside with confused looks on their faces. _What the hell?_ I mouthed.

"Come on," Andrew jerked me away from him. "Lets go, life has given us such little time to get to know one another, let's not waste it." He clasped onto my hand, preventing me from running away.

Andrew turned to face Edward. "It was very nice to meet you, Edward, and I truly hope that fate brings our paths together again." Poor Edward, he looked so confused and lost. Who knew a football player could be such a bitch?

Andrew wanted to walk hand in hand with me to the restaurant; he told me that it was only a couple blocks away. The walking part I didn't mind, it was the hand in hand part that I didn't like. It's not that I didn't like PDA, but this guy gave me the creeps.

Luck was on my side, and the paparazzi were not out tonight, or at least they were just waiting for us at the restaurant. Oh God, I would have to find a way to free my hand before the camera guys went crazy with it… Rose would love the publicity.

I tried, I really did, but no matter how hard, I could not tune this guy out. I tried thinking about a story I had in mind, or about some edits I still had to do, but no matter what I tried to think about, he brought me out of the safe haven that is my mind by asking me questions. Now any other time, or guy, I would be impressed that he was actually interested, but the moment the first word would leave my mouth he would interrupt me and start some story about himself.

After about a half hour went by I realized that we were still no where closer to this restaurant. "Hey, where are we going?" I asked, bringing us to a stop.

"To Tie Mie," Andrew answered while staring at my face, never blinking. Now that is just not normal.

"Where is that?"

"I'm not sure," he shrugged and continued to walk, still keeping me prisoner.

"What!" I pulled him back to stop again. "Are you telling me we have just been walking around and you have no idea where we are going?"

I felt like a rag doll; he pulled me into his embrace keeping me captive with his right arm around my waist, while his left hand cupped my chin. "I'm getting lost with you."

He leaned in as if he were about to kiss me. Oh crap.

"TAXI!" I yelled while wiggling my way out of his arms and running to the curb.

Andrew leaned over my shoulder to whisper in my ear, "You're right; we should save that for later."

How well could I fake food poisoning?

"Where to?" asked the cab driver.

_Home,_ I wanted to say but Rose would kill me if she found out I bailed so early on the date. "Tie Mie," I mumbled.

The cab driver recognized Andrew, striking up a conversation. I groaned when I saw the mob of paparazzi standing outside of Tie Mie. There were more camera guys here then with any of the other dates. Andrew must really be popular.

Once I stepped out of the cab I wanted to head straight into the restaurant. Andrew however, had other ideas. He wrapped his arm my shoulder and kissed the top of my head. My cheeks flared as I stood there, shocked.

"Bella, Andrew, are you guys an item now?" one of the camera guys yelled.

I was about to answer in my normal way, that we were just friends, but Andrew cut me off. "No comment, but I think that you guys can guess what's going on here." He gave me a tight hug.

Would it be bad if I punched him in the balls in front of all these witnesses? Yes, bad. I just need to try to get inside, and rush through the meal. After a few more minutes of Andrew trying to do some couple-y poses, all the while I mastered my imitation of a plank of wood, he told the paparazzi that I was just shy and that we needed to head inside.

The hostess eyed Andrew as she sat us down in our booth. _Good, have him. Please take him away._ I slid into side of the booth, happy to have the table in between us. When I saw him slide into the seat next to me, I could not hide the disappointment in my voice.

"Why are you sitting here?" I looked at the empty booth on the other side of the table.

"I wanted to be closer to you," he brought his face closer to mine. "I don't think I can bare the thought of us being separated, in any form, or in any way."

When our drinks arrived, I ordered the largest Margarita they had, and promptly excused myself to use the restroom. Once I was there I called Alice.

"Yello!" Alice answered, her way of saying 'hello.'

"He is a freak!" I hissed into the phone.

"Hey Edward," I heard her say. "Bella is calling from her date, saying that he is a freak... Alright, hold on." After a beeping noise I heard Edward speak, "Hey Bella, you're on speaker. I thought there was something off when I was talking to him."

"And you didn't warn me?" I sighed. "You could have popped into my room and told me to fake being sick so I wouldn't have to be here!"

"Wow, that bad?" asked Alice. "You're not willing to just get a free dinner and give up a few hours of your life?"

"Alice he is sitting on my side of the booth!" I tried not to yell. "This is a complete invasion of my bubble!"

"Oh Bella," sighed Alice. "You and your bubble..."

"Bubble?" Edward asked.

"Yeah, her personal space," explained Alice. "She can be a complete nut if someone gets in her bubble if they're not allowed."

"Am I allowed in your bubble?" Edward asked, and I wasn't sure if he was being serious or just teasing me.

"Yes, you are allowed in my bubble; otherwise we would never sit on the couch together."

"That is a big bubble if it takes up the whole couch," Edward snickered.

"You know what?" I began yelling.

"Bella," Alice spoke in a calming voice, cutting me off. "Just say you feel a draft and that you need to sit on the other side of the booth. It is very lady like, and a good way to get away from him."

"That could work," I mused.

"Cool, I'll be here when you get in," I could hear the smile in Alice's voice. "Have fun. Bye-bye."

When I went back to the table, I sat down, then after a minute I told him I could feel a draft, and needed to sit on the other side. For a glorious moment I thought that I was at least free of being so close to him. But Andrew soon told me he could also feel the draft and moved over to sit next to me again. I tried not to cry.

I spent the rest of the dinner thinking of things I would rather be doing. I would rather be at the symphony again with Lauren. I would rather be at the dentist getting my teeth drilled. I would rather be shopping for six hours straight with no breaks. Do an interview with Paris Hilton. Get a bikini wax. Have to spend the night in 5 inch heels that were two sizes too small. _Oh, that was a good one._

"What?" Andrew had said somethingm but I missed it thinking about better things.

"I asked if you are ready to leave?" he smiled a kind smile, making me feel bad. Hey, it's not his fault that he is a total weirdo.

"Yep, I'm ready," I tried not to sound too eager.

"Great, should we walk home and get lost with each other again? Or should I just get lost in you eyes on the ride back home?" Ok, he was just a jerk if those were my only options. What is the fastest way back home?

"Let's take a cab." Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll only talk to the driver again. "It looks like it is going to storm tonight."

No such luck: the whole ride home he just stared at me, even while I kept my gaze straight ahead. However I should have been paying a little more attention to Andrew; because out of nowhere I felt a wet, cold, slimy, worm like thing start to probe the inside of my ear.

I jumped with a small scream. Andrew was looking at me with lust filled eyes. "I want to make you make that noise again."

Oh God, oh God, oh God. "No, thank you," I responded as the car lurched to a halt. I jumped out and headed straight to the door of the building only find a few paparazzi standing outside. Shit!

Andrew was right on my heel, as I dived into the building, dodging questions as Andrew followed me in. Ugh, I so did not want to have to deal with him and the whole saying goodnight at the door thing.

Surprisingly, Andrew was quiet the whole ride up the elevator, maybe he finally got the message. We walked to my door, I was thinking of a nice way of saying "I hope to never see you again." I looked up at Andrew to say the small speech I had just crafted when he placed one of his fingers over my lips to hush me.

"Let me speak first," he whispered. "I know what you're going to say." Good, that saved me some time. "And I just want to say that you shouldn't worry," he continued. "We will make this work. I only have football for a few months."

Boy, he was off the mark. "You should probably stay here for a while so you can finish up whatever work you have, but really you could write almost anywhere so you can follow me during the season."

I wanted to start laughing; the kind of laughter that was mixed with hysterical crying. Instead I just stood there, completely shocked. We only met three hours ago! Was this guy serious?

I was lost in my thoughts so that I didn't realize that he was leaning in to kiss me until his mouth met mine, his lips along with his tongue forcefully parting my lips. I tried to lean away from him, but was stuck in his strong hold. When did he manage to get his arms around me?

Then he licked my teeth. That's right, I said _licked my teeth_. There was absolutely nothing sexy about it; it just felt weird and awkward and I hoped that I had nothing in my teeth. Wait, scratch that. I want there to be a big piece of food in my teeth so he would back off! Great, now he is moving on to the bottom set of teeth.

He pulled away from me, leaning his head on my shoulder. I probably should have stopped it, but it was like a train crash: you can't help but watch.

"Do you know what I think is sexy?" he panted in my ear.

I know I didn't want to know. But before I could open my mouth to protest he pushed his hand down my pants, grabbed the top of my thong then pulled up giving me the worst wedgie in the world.

"What!" I yelled as I started to squirm in his hold.

"I love the way you wiggle like that," he breathed.

"Get the fuck off of me!" I finally found my voice, and it only took a wedgie to get it back.

Andrew immediately let go of me, "Honey, what's wrong?"

"You!" I shouted. "I don't even know you, and you are going on about a future. And what the hell was that? There is nothing sexy about a fucking wedgie!"

"Well, I don't want you either," he wrinkled his nose.

"Good, then just leave," I turned around to open my door.

"Wait, baby, I'm sorry," he pleaded. "We can work this out; it doesn't have to be this way."

I couldn't hear what else he said once I closed the door on his face. Alice was standing in the entrance hall, her hands covering her mouth trying desperately not laugh in my face.

"How was the date?" she asked in a strained voice.

"I'm never wearing a thong again," I sighed as I started to walk to my room as if I had just gone horseback riding. Alice couldn't hold back her laughter. "Where's Edward?" I asked.

"He just had to use the restroom," Alice giggled. "He's been holding it all night, he didn't want to miss his chance to see Andrew #2 again. You really do have perfect timing."

"Whatever," I sighed as I walked over to Edward's door and knocked.

"Alice I'm going to kill you for making me drink so much water tonight," I heard Edward complain as he opened the door. "I don't care if it's supposed to cleanse me- oh, hey Bella, you're already here." Edward glared at Alice. "How was your date?"

Alice started to laugh again while I just growled, "I'll tell you about it tomorrow. Goodnight guys."

"Night!" Alice sang. "I better go. This storm looks like it's getting pretty bad."

And bad the storm got. I shed my clothes the moment I was in my room and crawled into my large, welcoming bed. I thought sleep would take me quickly considering how tired I felt, but with the lightning illuminating my room every five seconds, and thunder shaking my bed, all I could do was close my eyes as tight as I could.

I kept telling myself that I was being ridiculous, but I continued to jump as the hours went on. I am 28 years old for God's sake; I should be able to handle one little… A bright light intertwined with a loud crack shook me to my bones. _Screw it, I'm out of here_.

I flipped my comforter off and kicked the sheets away; I was wearing dark blue PJ shorts with a matching dark blue tank top reminding me of the corset I wore for Halloween. It felt like my heart was beating a million times a minute with each passing flash and crack.

I threw my door open and leapt to the entrance of Edward's room. Oh, this was going to be awkward. I knock gently, yet still loud enough to wake up Edward. I poked my head in, barely able to make out the sleeping figure on the bed.

"Edward," I whispered.

Nothing.

"Edward," I whispered a little louder.

He grunted.

"Edward!" I whined.

He must have been on his stomach as he lifted his head to look around at me. "Bella?" sleep was etched in his voice. "What's wrong?"

"It's just…" Ugh, I knew this was going to be weird. "The storm is really loud and…"

"What?" he whipped his eyes to focus more clearly.

"Well, when Alice lived here, she would always let me sleep with her whenever there was a really big storm…" I shuffled my feet.

"Are you serious?" he didn't sound mad, more intrigued. "You live in Seattle, the capital for bad weather, and Forks, the rainiest place in the United States."

"I know, but raining and a thunder storm are two completely different things and…" I was interrupted by another flash and crack causing me to jump.

"It really does freak you out," Edward spoke more to himself then me. "Alright, come on."

I ran to the bed and slid under the covers faster then either of us thought possible. I poked my face out of the covers to see him laughing. It was then that I realized that he was not wearing a shirt, showing off his chiseled chest.

"You are wearing boxers, right?" I asked as a blush crept onto my face, thinking about him without boxers, and let me just say that it was a good image.

"Yes I have boxers on; I do not sleep in the nude," Edward chucked as he lay back down, resting his head on the pillow and shut his eyes. "At least not in the winter."

_Mental note, he sleeps naked in the summer._

"Goodnight Bella," he whispered with a smile on his face.

"Night Edward," I squeaked out.

Although this was slightly awkward, I had to admit that it felt natural to lay here with Edward- natural and comfortable.

That was the last thing I thought before sleep took over with me snuggled in his arms.

* * *

**Explanation: So some of you maybe asking, "I thought Edward was going to start thinking about Bella as more then just a friend, so why did he push her to go out with Andrew."**

**Well this is a human story, and his is in fact a human, a male human. And as a dude, he flipped when he saw that Bella could go on a date with the quarterback from his favorite football team.**

**Haha, remember that I said that Andrew is based on a real person, yep he is a guy that I dated for like two days, and whenever I refer to him, I call him Andrew #2, and he did act, talk, and kiss like that.**

**The Mountain Lions are not a real NFL team. I watch football and I would be pissed if someone used my team for Andrew.**

**So I slipped in a little Gilmore Girls thing in there, the whole "I feel a draft, I need to move"**

**Next chapter is called: _Realization_**

**But here is the question- Who is the one to realize. Will it be Edward, or Bella, or both??**

**But next chapter will introduce the PLOT. Feel free to be excited, because I am, (to FINALLY be writing it)**

**Stay tuned. Haha**

Hope you Enjoyed!! :)


	14. Realization

So I was very happy to see that you all saw the Gilmore Girls thing I added in the last chap, we all think alike here. :) Haha Oh and I was more then surprised to see how many of you went on dates with guys like Andrew #2. I am very sorry. Haha

**To Lanemyer**, I have not forgotten your questions :), and I hope that this chap will show enough of Edward's feelings of when Bella came in from the storm. OH and I don't think that anyone has caught on, but I'm using the color blue as a sign. Like in the 6th since, whenever you saw the color red it meant a ghost, well blue mean something here.

**There is a song that goes with the last part of the chapter, and the song has two parts so when you see part 1 and part 2. That is what that is. But please read the story through, before listening to the song. I'll say what the song is at the end of this chap.**

Thanks to **Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter, **you guys make everything better.

I do not own Twilight.

* * *

Chapter 14- Realization

EPOV

It may have been the sun that disturbed my sleep, but it was what I saw that made me wake up. Bella was curled up in a ball like form that melted perfectly into me. Was last night not a dream then? I had thought that it was some weird dream, Bella sneaking into my room, asking to sleep with me because she was afraid of the storm. Who is afraid of storm now a days? But she looked so frightened, and if I was being honest with myself, there was probably very little I could say no to when it came to Bella.

Bella sighed in her sleep as she rolled onto her back, away from me. I felt colder the moment she was gone; more than just the physical sense of her body heat warming me, but I felt more vacant. That was odd. I looked down at her slumbering form - she looked different. Not in a bad way; far, very far from a bad way… but how could I explain it? The red in her hair shone with more vibrancy; because of the sun I'm sure. But her skin looked softer, more fragile; she looked like a porcelain doll. Her lips I never paid them much notice before, but now they seemed to be fuller than I remembered.

Bella's eyes fluttered open; she looked around as if not remembering how she got there. Then she looked up at me with eyes deeper than I thought possible. She blushed, which looked like a soft pink rose petal on marble, and quickly hid her face under the covers.

"You must think I'm a freak or something," her words were muffled by the covers but I could still hear the melodious sound. Had she always sounded like that?

"I think that regardless," I laughed. She pushed the sheets off of her, and glared at me. That pout only made me laugh. "It's ok," I smiled. "A lot of people are freaked out by storms; you can always climb in here if you are scared."

Bella looked away from me, and blushed again. I had an overpowering urge to reach over and brush my hand along her cheek. Where had that come from?

"I'm going to go get some breakfast," Bella looked up at me, making me feel like she could see farther than my eyes allowed. "Do you want some?"

"Sure, some captain crunch sounds great."

She pushed the covers even farther down showing her pajamas. I had not seen them last night in the dark, but now in the light I could see they were the exact same color as the corset she wore on Halloween: a deep blue that made her skin luminous. That night I thought that her skin shone because of the moonlight, but she shines all on her own.

"What?" Bella asked when she realized that I was staring at her.

"Are those new?" I somehow managed to ask.

"Yeah, Alice got them for me," then she walked out of my room, her hips swaying unconsciously as she did so.

The door closed, and my breath sped up. There was something wrong here. Why did I just pay so much attention to Bella? I have always known she was beautiful, but this morning she seemed radiant. It could have been the morning light, which would explain why she seemed to be so much more… just more.

No I need to stop seeing Bella that way, this is ridiculous.

_But you did decide that you are now her equal,_ a part of me thought. You can think of her like that.

That's true.

I rolled off my side of the bed, and walked over to my closet. As usual, I slid into my sweat pants, and black wife beater shirt that I always wear lounging around the house. Quickly, I looked at my reflection hoping that I would somehow look better before seeing Bella. My normally messy copper hair looked even more unruly from my night of sleep. I ran my fingers through my hair only to realize that it was completely at a loss. With a sigh I noticed the stubble along my jaw reminding me that I had not shaven in two days. Bella was just putting together our cereal which would be ready now, not leaving me any time to quickly shave.

I felt my heart start to beat faster at the thought of going to see Bella. We're just friends, nothing else, and yet here I was trying to make myself feel better before I see her. It's just like any other breakfast I eat with her. This is nothing.

Bella had the radio in the kitchen going on as she bobbed her head up and down to the beat, while shaking the cereal box as she placed back into the pantry. In this quick moment I allowed myself to admire the length of her legs.

"Aw, the breakfast of champions," I clapped my hand together and sat at the counter to take my first scoop. "So you have any plans today?"

Bella munched on her Fruit Loops, a calculating look on her face. Once she gulped down her food she answered me, "I probably should do some edits on one of my stories, but after last night I'm not in the mood to really do anything."

Her date, I had forgotten about that, "How did it go?" I asked.

Bella scrunched up her nose as if she smelled a foul odor. "Let's just say I would rather go out with Newton again after that."

I raised an eyebrow amused, "It couldn't have been that bad."

"Edward you talked to him for a solid 20 minutes," Bella crossed her arms, looking amazing with her frustrated expression.

I grimaced as I thought back to meeting Andrew. He looked normal when I shook his hand and introduced myself as Bella's roommate. But I could tell something was off when he wouldn't release my hand, and just stared at me. After an awkward minute he finally liberated my hand as he told me "It is good to meet the man who has kept Bella safe while I have not been here."

While walking to the living room with Andrew I tried to sort through my head if Bella knew this guy; she would have told me when I showed her the name. And yet this guy was sitting on the couch with his feet on the coffee table as if he had been here a million times before.

"So, do you know Bella, I mean have you ever met her before?" I had asked.

"We have not met in the physical since, but when my agent told me the name of the lovely young woman who wished to date me, I knew that it was meant to be; that _we_ are meant to be." Oh God, Bella was going to kill me. We sat for a few more minutes in a very painful silence, "So how do you feel about the season so far?" I asked.

"You are a fan of the sport?" he asked while studying the fan on the ceiling.

"Err… yeah. You guys are doing pretty well."

"Yes, the season has been good."

The conversation continued on like that, but would only pick up if I ever mentioned Bella. I knew there was something off about him, but he was the quarterback of the Mountain Lions, and I really wanted front row tickets.

"Well?" Bella asked bringing me back to the present.

"Yes, I should have saved you from that date," I smiled a crooked smile. "Sorry."

"The date, the picture that he made me pose for, and that kiss," Bella shuddered at the word kiss.

"You guys kissed?" I felt a pressure on my chest, an animal begging to get let out.

"Kissed, attacked…"

"Attacked?!" I growled. I didn't care who he was, or who he played for anymore, I wanted to hunt him down and kill him.

"Edward," Bella's calm, yet slightly worried voice brought me back from my plans on how to find Andrew. "It's alright, he didn't really attack me."

"What happened?" I asked trying to keep my voice steady.

"He was crazy and actually thought that this was the start of a real relationship," she shrugged. "I feel bad for him actually, something must have happened to him to really mess him up."

"Or he is just an idiot," I mumbled. "So, what did he do?" Bella looked down at her bowl and blushed. "Bella…" I warned.

"It is actually kind of funny once you think about it," she giggled out of nervousness. "But he actually licked my teeth."

I blinked. A part of me was furious that this excuse of a man had touched her, yet another side of me was amused at his apparent lack of skill when it came to kissing.

"Yeah, and that was not even the bad part," Bella eyes widened as if she just realized what she said out loud.

"What did he do after that?" If I were not so angry that he had touched her, I would have enjoyed seeing her blush like this. But even I could tell this was not a blush from remembering an embarrassing moment, which she secretly enjoyed, but she was blushing from being uncomfortable. And I could hurt Andrew just for that reason alone.

Bella took a breath before explaining to me in a rush of words, "Well it was right after he kissed me, and he was holding on to me, then he asked me what he thinks is sexy, but at that point I just wanted to get the hell away from him. So then he reached down, grabbed the top of my thong, and pulled it up, giving me the most intense wedgie ever. He said he liked the way I wiggled under him. So by then I had had enough and I was kind of mean and told him I didn't want anything to do with him."

I didn't saying, I needed to process what she just said. So he thought that pulling on her thong, and giving her a wedgie was sexy, and he liked the way she wiggled in his arms? Ha, if it had been me, I would have known how to give her true pleasure. I pictured it for just a moment, how she would writhe beneath me, gasping my name…

Wait, did I just imagine Bella and I together? Where did that come from? I knew she looked different this morning, but my train of thought was becoming more then I could handle right now.

"Are you alright?" I asked, trying desperately not to imagine Bella as I had just seen her in my mind.

"Yeah I'm fine. It was just really weird," she smiled. "You are such a great guy Edward, being all brotherly protective."

Brotherly? Was that all this was, me being protective of her as if I was her brother? No, I don't think so. If I had a sister I would have been upset that some guy manhandled them, that much was certain. But this – with Bella – was something different – something much more than just brotherly instincts. Did she see me as nothing more then a brother? Granted, I had not given her any other reason to see me as otherwise. Did I want her to see me as more? I would have to see her as more before she would see me as more… and if I think about this any more I'm going to get a headache.

"You are important to me Bella," I spoke softly. "I hate to hear that someone forced you to do something that you didn't want to do. It makes me want to rip off their head." I grinned.

"Well you can't rip off their head," she smirked. "Because Jasper and Emmett would be very put off that you hurt their significant others."

I laughed as I walked over to the sink to rinse off my bowl, "So you are not really planning on doing anything today then?"

"Nope," Bella handed me her now empty bowl so I could rinse it as well. "What do you have in mind?"

"Nothing too big," I shrugged. "Have a Jackie Chan move marathon, then walking down to that little gyro shop to pick up some lunch later."

"That sounds great!" Bella smiled enthusiastically.

"You sure Rose doesn't need you today?" I asked. "Or will Alice sneak in here to abduct you and force you to shop, yet again?"

The house phone began to ring, interrupting Bella from answering me. Bella walked over to the phone then smiled when she say the caller ID. "Well speak of the devil…" she smiled before answering. "Hey Rose, how's it going?"

Bella leaned against the counter and rolled her eyes, "Yeah, I figured Alice would tell you about the date - saves me time."

My chest began to burn at the thought of Andrew and what he did to Bella.

"You're going to Nebraska?" Bella gasped. "Oh yeah, the new guy that you signed on… Oh, ok, just going to visit him in his town and get a feel of where he is from… No, that makes since… But you'll be back by Saturday, so I'm sure Emmett will be fine… Yes I promise I'll take care of him, and Edward promises too."

I raised my eyebrow at her when she looked over at me. She laughed and dismissed my un-vocalized question.

"Alright then," Bella continued to talk to Rose. "I'll see you Saturday!" Bella hung up the phone and looked at me with a large smile. "Rose is in Nebraska talking to this guy she's signing, so looks like I'm free until Saturday. But we all have to help take care of Emmett while Rose is away."

I liked Emmett, and would help him in a moment's notice, but I wondered why we have to take care of him. "Why? Is he sick or something?" I asked.

"No, not sick…" Bella bit her lip as if she wanted to laugh but knew that it was too cruel. "It just that when is not with Rose he becomes a little lost."

"What about Alice then?" I was not sure why I was so adamant on being alone with Bella, but all I could tell was that the thought of having to share Bella, today... or ever... was a difficult one.

"Rose told me that she sent Emmett over to Jasper and Alice's, and that she talked to Alice, and she knows not to talk to me after the night I had."

I could not imagine a better way to spend my time than to be with Bella. When I moved in, I noticed that Bella had her fair share of Jackie Chan movies, and not just the ones we know like Rush Hour, but the movies that no one in this country knows he made, and are strictly all in Chinese, with quick subtitles at the bottom. Throughout the months I have been adding to her collection, and we had talked about doing a sit down movie marathon, but those plans just always seemed to fall through. However, today is the perfect day to live our dream.

I was supposed to be watching the movie, but every time I would hear Bella laugh, I would subtly glance to my side, and try to watch her before she realized she was being watched.

How was I supposed to help myself? Not just her face, but also the air around her would light up as she laughed. Her smiles were wide and friendly when she would throw her head back and let out a laugh. Whenever she would laugh too hard, a piece of her hair would break free from the loose bun she wore; I fought the urge to tuck that strand of hair behind her ear. By half way through the second movie she untied the bun all together, letting it cascade along her neck, shoulders, and back. But what truly caught me off guard were her eyes. This morning I was surprised to see how large and round they were, but tonight I saw that her eyes glistened in a way that brightened the deep chocolate depths and brought them to life. She was more then a beauty; she was radiance in its true form.

We ended up calling Emmett to come over and hang out with us, and he was more than willing to spend time with someone. Jasper and Alice wanted some alone time tonight, which left Emmett alone as well. He really was like a lost puppy without Rosalie. He would still make his jokes, or tease Bella, but even I couldn't help by notice that without his significant other, he didn't shine as bright.

Emmett ended up staying the night with us, sleeping on the couch. I had to shove my fist in my mouth when Bella practically tucked him in as if he were a child. And to add to it, Emmett asked her how much longer until Saturday came. Right as Bella was about to answer, Emmett's phone rang. His eyes lit up when he realized it was Rose. So Bella and I said goodnight, and left Emmett on the couch to talk to Rose.

I didn't sleep as well that night. I tried to tell myself it was because my pillows were not positioned correctly, but I just didn't want to admit the truth. I didn't want to acknowledge how disappointed I was to realize that there were no dark brown eyes looking up at me. I didn't want to concentrate too long on how cold my body felt without another presence. And I certainly didn't want to allow myself to become excited at the thought of seeing Bella once I woke up.

When I woke up, I quickly showered and dressed for my day, trying to slow my actions as I did so; I really needed to calm myself down. As I walked to the kitchen I was expecting to see Bella and Emmett there, but it was empty. I walked back to the living room, and saw her door open. I poked my head in and called out her name, but there was only silence. Where was she? Rose was out of town, and if Alice was just waking up from a long night of what I think she was doing, then I highly doubt she would want to be walking around at the mall.

I was starting to panic as ridiculous thoughts started to course through me. I mean, there was no way that she could have been kidnapped last night without me noticing it, right? Just as the panic started to transition to terror, I heard the front door open. I raced to see Bella walking in with two cups of coffee, and her head tilted to the side, holding her cell phone to her ear.

"Hold on Rose," Bella looked up at me with a smile. "Hey, I went out to get some coffee, but I still haven't gotten breakfast."

She handed me one of the cups and walked to the kitchen. Coffee, she was out to get coffee. And she had a cell phone which I could have easily called. This girl was making me lose my mind.

"But, Rose, I'm tired of going out on dates," Bella sighed as she pulled out some eggs from the refrigerator. "Did you see the pictures of Andrew after he left the apartment? He went up to the photographers and told them that we were in the middle of a lover's feud. And it's not just him, but all the guys that I have gone out with through this agent to agent thing - they have all been freaks."

I leaned against the counter as I watched Bella start to scramble her eggs, taking out her frustrations.

"No, I don't want to go on any more dates… Really? So if I go on this one date then I don't have to go out with anyone else until February?" Bella paused and bit her lip. "Ok, deal… let me grab a pen and paper… oh, ok…wait, Rose, you're breaking up." Bella pulled her cell away from her to check her reception, which was ridiculous since we always had full bars here. "No, I still can't understand what you're saying… Rose… Rose?" Bella looked at her cell once again and sighed before hanging it up and tossing it to the counter.

I waited for her to say something, but after a few minutes I figured that she had not realized that I was there. "Bella?"

Just as I thought she would, Bella jumped and let out a small scream. "Sorry, Edward," she panted. "I was just caught up with what Rose told me."

"Another date?" I asked.

"Yeah, apparently this guy's agent approached Rose about me, which is a first," she shook her head as she grabbed some butter.

"So who is this guy?" I tried to sound casual.

"That is what I was trying to get out of Rose but she is in a really bad reception area, and will be until she comes back," she let out a frustrated groan. "I'm just really tired of dating such loser guys. I am starting to think that famous men are nut jobs!"

I laughed at her pouting, although I couldn't help but be distracted with how soft her lips looked. "Well do you at least know where you're going?"

"Yeah we're going to Garage," Bella smiled, approving the destination.

Garage was a bowling alley/billiard type of bar. I was surprised that some Hollywood guy would want to meet at that place.

"How are going to recognize him?"

"Well, he was the one who wanted to date me," she shrugged. "I guess he will find me once I get there."

I had seen Bella go on dates before, and I had even pushed her to go on one just a few days ago, but the idea of Bella going out with someone now made me feel uneasy. Bella and I talked as we ate breakfast when she informed me that Emmett had to get to the office early this morning. She also told me that she was going over to hang out with Alice today, making my heart suddenly feel heavier.

Once Bella was gone I walked over to my piano. I certainly had not forgotten about Andrew Lloyd Webber, but nothing that I wrote sounded worthy enough for him to listen to. I had been dabbling with a few notes here and there, but they always sounded off. I know what it takes to write an amazing piece; it takes passion, emotion, and it takes feeling. The only problem was that I didn't know what I was feeling.

The next morning I woke up feeling worse then I did the day before. I continued to ask myself what was wrong with me. I was not getting any sleep, I was feeling anxious about Bella's date, and I was as moody as a teenage girl. Everything was off, and nothing was right. And the only thing that could make any of this remotely better was seeing Bella. I didn't bother getting dressed for my day, and simply decided to stay in my sweats and t-shirt; I wanted to get out of my room as soon as possible. Just as I anticipated, Bella was reclining along the couch with her laptop on her lap. I felt my body relax just at the sight of her.

"Trying to get some writing in before your date?" Could she hear the venom in my voice when I said the 'date' word?

"Actually," Bella looked at the corner of the screen on her laptop. "The date is at four, and I'm on my own today for getting ready, so I should probably start to get ready at one. And it is already eleven."

"You need three hours to get ready?" I laughed.

"Part of the deal I had with Rose is that since this was my last date for a while I had to go all out in the looks department," Bella grinned as she looked up at me.

I held onto her stare. I looked into her eyes searching for an answer to a question I didn't know. It felt like I could drown in her eyes and die peacefully. Why did Bella look so different to me now?

"I…err…" she stuttered as she shifted her stare to her lap. "I better go grab a light lunch." Bella let her hair cover her face, but not before I saw the blush. She glanced at me one more time before heading off to the kitchen.

What was I looking for in her eyes? It seemed like I had almost found the answer. I was not sure what any of this was, or what it meant. I'm probably sick. Yes, most definitely sick. I sat at my piano for the next couple hours. While Bella continued to write, I played some of her favorite songs, but once she left to go get ready for her date, I went back to practicing with the notes I had in my head.

When I played our friendship song, I recognized that the notes that I was playing with were very similar to Bella's. I had a sense of what the song was about, but I had not been sure. Had I made this song about Bella without me even knowing it? No, the note that I was searching for was not Bella's note, it was a note for…

Before I could concentrate any further on that thought my cell phone started to ring. "Hey Em," I answered before he could say anything.

"What's up, Edward, anything cool going on?" he sounded a little better then last night, but I could still sense the loneliness in his voice.

"No, nothing really," I stroked the keys on the piano. "I was just working on the Andrew Lloyd Webber piece."

"That's awesome!" he really did sound genuinely happy for me, a quality I loved about Emmett. "So, what's Bella up to?"

"She is getting ready for a date right now." Luckily Emmett could not see the look of distaste on my face.

"Another one?" he laughed.

"Yeah, well Rose promised that this guy would be the last one for a while," that thought seemed to calm me down some.

"Well that is very nice of my Rose," he sighed at her name. "So I was wondering if you want to come over and hang out tonight. I got the new version of Guitar Hero, but I have to be lead guitar first round, and I really want to try it out. Jasper might come over too."

I laughed at his enthusiasm, "That sounds great Emmett, what time do you want me over?"

"How about around 5, we can order a pizza, and have some beer!"

"Alright, I'll come over. See you then, bye." I hung up the phone and chuckled at how young at heart Emmett really was.

"What's so funny?" a soft angel-like voice asked.

I looked up and a wave of unknown emotion soared through me. She looked beautiful, even if she was dressed for a casual night out. She had on a navy blue sweater top that showed her smooth bare shoulders. It was loose around her chest, but clung to her small waist, showing her curves off perfectly. Her low-rise black jeans hugged her just as well. Looking up to her face I saw that she had her hair in relaxed curls that hung on either side of her face, making her fair complexion standout along with her dark eyes that were only lightly coated in makeup that she never needed; she was beautiful all on her own.

I stood up and responded to her smile with one of my own. "It was nothing, just Emmett making me laugh."

"He does that," she smirked. "You guys have plans for tonight?"

"Yeah, I'm meeting him at his place in an hour," I shifted on my feet, not quite sure why I felt so nervous. "So I should probably go take a shower."

Bella's smiling face turned to a frown, which nearly broke my heart. I never wanted to see this angel become upset. "Edward," she took a set closer to me. "Are you alright, you seem… anxious?"

She knew me too well, not that I minded. "Yeah, I guess I am."

"Why?" she was closer.

What would I give to know the reason why I feel all these things that I do, to know what the hell I was feeling? So I decided to give her the next best answer. "I don't know; I just have a bad feeling about this date."

A calming smile returned to her face, "Edward, you really shouldn't be worried. I'm actually kind of excited; I haven't been bowling in forever. So, at least this time I have something to distract me if he turns out to be another loser."

I smiled at her optimism.

"Edward," Bella stood so close to me I could feel her breath on my face. I breathed in as deeply as I could without being noticed. "You really do worry about me too much. I'm a big girl. I handled all those other guys."

"I just don't like to see you doing something you don't want to do," I whispered.

"You truly are an amazing person, Edward Masen." She reached up to my face, and brushed away a strand of hair before saying goodbye and leaving.

There are moments that define your life. I have had many: When I hurt Bella in high school, when I moved off on my own, when my parents died, when I broke away from Lauren. But just then, right when Bella did that simple gesture of brushing the hair way from my eyes- that defined a moment that I could tell shaped my life more than I could have ever thought possible. Because it was in that moment I realized I was in love with her. I am in love with Isabella Swan.

I stood there for what felt like a very long time and yet no time had passed at all. Or at least that's what it felt like.

In love? Me? With her? How was that possible? I sat on my piano bench, clutching my hand to my chest as if it could stop the pain. Was it pain, or was this pleasure? How could I have let it escalate this far? To think about Bella as a friend was one thing, but to love was another- I couldn't love her. Could I?

But with that thought, I felt my heart clench and I knew that I did. I loved her more than I ever thought I loved Lauren, more than I loved anything else, more than myself, more then I believed possible. So, that was the emotion I was looking for within her, within me? It was no longer a question– I was in love with her.

I thought back to what Jasper told me about Alice, how he just knew. Well, I knew now that Bella was the one. She was it. I can never love anyone as much as I loved her. I didn't want to love anyone other then Bella. But would Bella love me? I debated on whether she would ever want to go on a date with me. How could I expect her to love me in the same way, or even one fraction of the amount that I loved her?

This brought on another onslaught of emotions, emotions that I could easily recognize as rejection (which I knew I would face), remorse, and dread. How could I continue to go on knowing that she could never love me, and that she would, inevitably, choose someone else?

It was too much; I needed to talk to someone. I ran out my door in just my sweats and t-shirt, making my way over to Jasper's as quickly as my legs could carry me. I didn't care, or really notice, that it was pouring rain. My only thought was my concern for Bella, hoping that she had an umbrella with her.

I was bouncing in place as I rode the elevator, most likely looking like a drowned rat, and frightening the two women in the elevator with me. Once I reached Jasper's floor I sprinted to his door and began to pound violently. Alice opened it, asking me some questions that I didn't hear as I leapt into their apartment and began my search for Jasper.

"Jasper!" I called out, my voice hoarse from who know what. "Jasper!"

"Edward," Alice ran over to me and held onto my arm trying to calm me down. "What's wrong? Jasper isn't here; he's over at Emmett's"

She led me to the couch and sat me down. I was exhausted. I looked over at the clock as saw that it was 5:30. Where had the time gone? How long had I sat on my piano bench just thinking about Bella? I could probably think about her for hours and not notice the slip of time.

"Edward," Alice's voice grew more frantic as she held onto me. "What's wrong?"

"I…" how was I supposed to say this? I let out a frustrated sigh and ran my fingers through my hair. "I just… I just-"

"Is this about Bella?" she asked in a calm voice.

"W-what? How?" I stuttered.

"Let's get you out of these clothes and then we can talk."

Alice led me to her large bedroom, handed me a pair of Jasper's clothes and sent me to the bathroom to dry off and change. Once I calmed myself down a bit, I walked to the living room and saw Alice sitting there with a small smile and a cup of tea for the both of us. It reminded me of Bella, which made me smile as well.

"You know Bella got used to drinking tea when she was stressed out living with me," Alice patted the seat next to her. I sat down and took a sip of the hot liquid. "So if this is what I think it is, then I understand why you are freaking out," she continued to smile.

Although I knew I would most likely tell her, I still didn't want to reveal my revelation quite yet. "And what do you think it is?"

Alice's smile faded before she studied my expression, then it quickly came back. "I know that you are in love with Bella."

I was not expecting that. "How?" I whispered.

"Aren't you curious as to when, seeing as you only discovered this today?" she smiled slyly.

I felt my forehead crease, "You mean you have known for a long time?"

"I had my suspicions since the moment you arrived, Edward."

"But I was getting over Lauren, and I barely even acknowledged Bella." I shook my head thinking back to that day.

"Well, it was two things really. It was the fact that you did acknowledge Bella, when you completely ignored me. It showed that you obviously felt something towards her." She rolled her eyes as if it was obvious. "And the reaction from Bella after she saw you - I have never seen her so angry or hurt, and I know that she had a passion for you. And I'm not saying love at that point, but I'm just saying that there was something."

"Alright, go on," I nodded.

"Then the night of Bella's birthday I started to see that way you looked at her," Alice spoke softly. "And I saw the way you looked, when you looked at her, and I knew that there were some intense feelings there."

"So, when did you know that I was in love?" How long ago had I been showing the signs of what I felt?

"Halloween, the night of the party," she shrugged.

"What, how does that prove anything?" I asked, shocked. "I didn't even know it was her."

Alice's smile turned devious, "Well you could say that night was my little experiment."

"What do you mean 'experiment?'"

"Well it's completely obvious that I set you guys up, had you two looking for the wrong person. So, I wanted to see if you guys would still find each other, see if the love you guys had for each other would draw you together."

"Wait … the love that we have for each other?" I was lost at this point. "Alice, this is just me in love here; this is unrequited love."

"Bull crap," she snorted. "That girl is just as crazy about you as you are about her."

My heart wanted to fly out of my chest with this news, but couldn't fool myself into hoping. "Has Bella ever said this to you?"

"No, but I can tell just by the way she looks at you," Alice reached over and patted my hand. "Just like I could tell by the way you look at her."

I shook my head. "Alice, there is no way that Bella could ever love me. She's too good for me."

"Oh, please," she rolled her eyes with a sigh. "Yeah, you messed up, and you were an idiot, but Edward you fixed it. You made things better with her. Have you ever thought that maybe this is the way things were meant to be?"

"What, that I was meant to waste ten years of my life with Lauren?" I asked bitterly.

"Yes, if you want to look at it that way. But ask yourself what would have happened if Bella never went to that party? You two probably would have gone your separate ways, and Bella would not have been as motivated to get out of Forks as she had been. Maybe she never would have ended up here. But the fact is that for those ten years that you call a 'waste' Bella was out there trying to make something of herself, to prove to everyone that she is not some scared little girl anymore. And you were setting yourself up for disaster."

I glared at her.

"But look at what that disaster brought you. You finally had to ask for help, something which I highly doubt you often did; and you were forced to make amends with the person you hurt. And trust me when I say that had you not gone to Bella all beat up, she probably never would have listened to your apology. But she _did_ listen, and you lived with her, became her friend, and fell in love. None of this is a coincidence Edward, you two were meant to be."

I thought about her words. It seemed too good to be true, the idea that maybe Bella and I were destined to be with each other. That maybe I could permit myself to picture a life with Bella. A life where I belonged to her, and she belonged to me…

"No," I whispered with my elbows propped up on my legs, and my head hanging with my face in my hands. "There is no way…"

"Why?" Alice sounded angry. "Why are you bringing yourself down? Bella does this all the time, too. You two are more alike than you think."

"Alice," I looked up at her with pained eyes. "How could she love me?"

Alice let out a sigh and leaned back into the couch. "You know when Jasper and I started saying I love you back and forth, I was stunned. I mean I knew he loved me and that we were destined for each other, but it still amazed me how someone as great as him could love me." Alice smiled at the memories in her head before she took a breath. "But I had to have faith in him, in our relationship that somehow, someway, we really were in love, true love."

She looked back at me, "Edward, you need to have that faith in life. You don't have to tell her you love her, but tell her that you care for her. You might be surprised in what she has to say in return, and surprised in a good way."

"You're right," I sat up straighter. "I at least have to tell her what I feel, or maybe just kind of allude to it… but I have to know." While my faith in Bella's feelings was still a work in progress, I knew I had to let her know how I felt. Even if I didn't say the words, 'I love you,' I had to say something. I owed her that much.

I stood up and began looking for my wet clothes, which Alice had conveniently, place in a plastic bag for me. Alice stood up after me and started bouncing. "Oh this is so exciting!" she squealed. "Can I call the guys and Rose and tell them, please, please, please?"

"The guys," I paused for a second. "Yeah, you probably should call them, I told Emmett that I would be over there with them at 5, and it's already… 7, wow." I had not realized time how gone by so quickly. "Go ahead and fill them in. Look if I want to shower and get ready before Bella gets home, than I better hurry." I turned around and gave Alice a tight hug. "Thank you."

She patted my bag and returned my hug with more force then I expected from her little body. "Any time, now go get your girl!"

_**part 1**_

I ran back to my apartment thinking about Bella the entire time, wondering what I would tell her. I wouldn't say that loved her, not yet- I didn't want to scare her off. Maybe I should just kiss her the moment she walked in the door, just like in all the old movies. I shivered at the thought of touching Bella's lips. No, when I kiss her I don't want it to be a surprise attack; I want her to want it, too.

Maybe I should just sit her down and talk to her about how I feel, and ask if she could ever feel the same. Oh, if she said yes, how happy I would be. I could barely focus on my shower or that I had put body gel in my hair instead of my shampoo. I almost even slipped and fell when I was stepping out.

What if she didn't believe that I loved her, that maybe I was just joking? Well, that was an obvious answer; I would prove it to her that I would do anything. I would climb mountains, swim oceans, cross lines, and break all the rules. I would do whatever it took to show her that what I felt was truer then the light that shone from the sun. I would tell her that the love I have for her put to shame all the other great loves, because none of them were in love with her, with Bella.

How could someone not love her? She had a way of calming me with just her smile. The way that she listened, truly _listened_ without changing the subject to her, and would try to help me. It was her continuous aid that made me love her from the beginning, I think. Even when I had nothing in the world: no money, no home, just one friend... she still had a way of making me feel affluent.

Bella was the one; she is my life now.

It was almost nine once I was ready. I rehearsed what I was going to say to her until I had the words perfectly memorized. I was a little worried that she had not made it home yet, but remembered she was at a bowling alley, and those things take time.

I found my cell phone which I had left on my piano stand, and saw four missed calls, and three text messages. Two of the calls were Emmett, the other two from Jasper.

The first text message was from Alice.

_**Have faith in the world, Edward.**_

The second was from Emmett.

_**Dude, Alice just called us and I am way psyched! It totally makes up for ditching us**__._

The third was from Jasper.

_**I told you, you would know once you found the one.**_

I had just closed my phone when I heard the front door start to unlock. This was it, this is when I would tell Bella I how I felt.

"Bella!" I called out, making my way to find her. She had an odd expression on her face, I hoped she wasn't sick.

"Oh, hey, Edward, I thought you would be over at Emmett's." Bella smiled and it made my heart speed up.

"Yeah, the plans changed. Look, I really want to talk to you right now." I guided her to the living room and sat on the couch.

"Sure, I want to tell you something too!" Bella bit her lip from excitement. She was too beautiful.

_**part 2**_

"Alright you go first." What I want to talk about would take some time.

"So the guy that I just went on a date on was really amazing. He was super funny, and sweet, and just great. His name is Jacob Black, you know the basketball player for the NorCal Wolves. And, Edward… I think I really like him."

Bella let out a contented sigh and leaned back against the couch. "I'm going to see him again next week, but I think this could turn out to be something really serious. He is just such a great guy, and Edward I really want you to meet him and… Edward, are you alright?"

What a funny question. Was I alright? How could anyone be remotely close to "alright" when their heart and soul were breaking while talking to the one they love, the one who was breaking them?

"No I'm fine," I croaked out. "I just…" I had to swallow back my pain and force myself to smile up at Bella. "That's really great."

"It is, isn't it?" she sighed once again. "I mean after all those horrible dates, and I finally get this great guy. It's perfect." She looked at me with her innocent brown eyes. "Edward, are you sure you are alright? What was your news?"

"It was nothing," I held my breath, focusing on my lack of oxygen more than the hollow pain in my chest. "I'm just tired, so I'm going to head off to bed." I stood up and was about to leave when I felt her delicate arms wrap around me.

"Don't worry, Edward," she whispered behind me. "You'll find someone, just have faith."

I nodded and bid her goodnight once again before locking myself into my room.

Have faith that I would find someone else? I could never find anyone else, not now, not that I am fully aware of what I feel. Bella was it for me. I was made for her. And I could only love her.

As for my faith in the world, and how everything would sort itself out... well, let's just say that my faith in the world, in life, in love was crushed. _I_ was crushed. I was broken, all I had left was the love I had for a woman who will never know.

* * *

**SO the song that goes with this…**

/watch?vCodLVhl65rQ

**And if that link does not work, it is Brandi Carlile, The Story. So when you listen to it, Part 1 is before the instamental, and part 2 is after.**

**I hope you guys are not angry with me, but this is where I have seen this story heading all along. I think that not much explanation needs to go on here, I mean Edward is about to tell Bella he loves her, and she find someone else. Harsh.**

**The next chapter is called: Where is everyone?**

**It will be in Bella's POV, and I will NOT write about the bowling date with Jacob but I will have her think about it, but Jacob will make his apearance. so yep**

**ON a side note, my birthday is next week, on the 11th. I will be 19!! Wooop to me! I'm going to go play Laser Tag with my friends. (OH yeah). Haha**

**So I hope you enjoyed. :)**


	15. Where is everyone?

**Hello Hello!!**

**So, apparently no one ready the A/N, haha because I already announced it, but I will do it again. Haha**

**_THIS STORY WILL HAVE A HAPPY ENDING, AND IT IS A EXB STORY_.**

**I like happy endings thank you.**

**So I love everyone who is reading and reviewing and just being awesome. Thank you all.**

**Shout out to _Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter_. You guys are too cool.**

**And today (well yesterday as of 30 min ago) is my birthday and thanks to everyone who sent me a happy birthday, shout out to all of you!! Thank you!**

**I do not own twilight**

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Chapter 15- Where is Everyone?

Bella POV

I was all smiles when I woke up the next morning. My amazing date with Jacob was still fresh in my mind and I couldn't help but let out a contented sigh as I closed my eyes once again and tried to picture him in my mind.

I would be lying if I said I didn't notice him when I first walked into Garage, not because I knew him from basketball (yeah, right) but because he was indeed very good looking. Of course I immediately compared him to Edward, like I do with all men, and like all men he still did not stand up to Edward in the looks department, but he had something different about him. There was a rawness to him that appealed to a side of me that I did not know I had.

He was tall- very, very tall, and built almost as much as Emmett. He had on simple blue jeans and a nice button down white shirt, which had the sleeves pushed back to his elbows showing off his smooth russet color skin. My eyes traveled up along his torso, taking note on how thin his shirt was, and how if the light in the room was a little brighter, and shining directly on him, I would probably be able to see through the shirt and behold his chest…

Finally I made it up to his face. He had strong masculine features with a chiseled jaw, straight nose, and a very luscious looking lips that were formed into a cocky smirk. I shot my eyes up to his, to find that he had been watching me gawk at him. His eyes were brown, like mine, only his were dancing with life and entertainment. Out of habit after looking at Edward, I looked up to see that his hair was short, black, and tame. I sighed realizing that not everyone could have perfectly imperfect hair.

I shook my head to clear my thoughts and walked over to the bar. It really had become a bad habit of mine to compare everyone to Edward when there really is no comparison; I mean the guy is practically perfect. No matter how many times I tease him about his flaws, I knew that he really was as close to perfection that any man could reach, and that whichever girl he ends up with will be very lucky, and would have to match his perfection with her own.

I blushed as I realized that a few days ago I had almost imagined myself as the woman to be with Edward. What kind of crazy thoughts were those? First off: Edward, I mean _really?_ Like I could ever stand a chance at getting him. And second: it was bound to happen, to start to have feelings for the god-like creature I now lived with.

It was so utterly pathetic… now where the hell was my date?

"Hey," I heard a lower voice, laced with amusement.

I looked up to see the good looking man I noticed when I had walked in. "Hi," I managed to say back.

"Waiting for your date?" he smiled as if he thought what he said was funny.

I could not help myself from responding to his smile with a smile of my own. "Something like that. It's actually a blind date."

"Hmm, you could probably could sneak out before the two of you meet, it's not like you two have seen each other," he shrugged playfully.

"Well I have not seen him, but he knows what I look like," I frowned at that thought.

"What kind of blind date is that?" he asked as he laughed. I liked his laugh, it was not the musical sound like Edward's, but it was still nice.

"Maybe not blind," I smiled. "But a bad vision date?"

We continued to talk, and I continued to laugh. I learned that his name was Jacob Black, it sounded familiar but I could not place it. When I told him who I was, he just nodded and said he had read some of my stories, and that I was a very good writer.

It felt very comfortable sitting here talking to him. He had this type of warmth about him that made me instantly relaxed and more open with him. And although we sat very close together, he never touched me, or tried to pull some kind of move on me. For some reason that made him all the more amazing. Plus, it didn't hurt that he was hot.

I was trying to calm down my laughter after he just told me a very funny story of how he broke his nose by wrestling a dog; a pug to be more exact.

I glanced over at the clock, which was mounted on the wall behind the bar. "Oh, crap," I sat up straighter and began to look around franticly. I had been sitting here with Jacob for over an hour, and my date had not shown up. Maybe he did show up and saw me sitting with Jacob and left thinking I was some sleazy chick who picked up guys at bars… even though I was kind of flirting with Jacob at a bar, but that was not the point! The point was that I probably made some kind of horrible impression, and he ran off to tell his agent, who would tell Rose, who would make me go out on another date because I didn't fulfill my end of the bargain. Crap.

"What's wrong?" Jacob asked, real concern written on his face.

"I was supposed to meet the not so blind date guy here over an hour ago," I sighed in defeat and slumped in my bar stool. "Now, I'm going to get in trouble."

Jacob laughed his care free laugh, and although my face was set in a frown, I could feel the sides of my lip twitch in attempt to smile with Jacob.

"Don't worry about that!" he laughed. "I'm your date."

I looked up at the smug smile that was playing on Jacob's lips. I was not quite sure if I should be upset, but I wasn't. So, I just laughed, playfully smacking him in his chest. "No way!"

"I saw you checking me out when you first walked in," he laughed as my cheeks burned. "And then I realized that you must not know who you were going out with, and when I came over and started talking with you it just confirmed it."

We continued to talk for about the next hour, and I explained to him why I didn't know who I was going on the date with. I quickly insisted that we bowl, and I was very pleased to see that he was not one of those guys who just let you win, but he didn't make me feel bad about losing.

I didn't even realize that time was passing by, so when Jacob announced that it was time to leave, I more then a little sad. "But it's still so early," I complained.

Jacob then explained to me that he was on a basketball team, and played for the NorCal Wolves, and that he had to go to a team meeting this weekend, but would be back in town by Monday.

"Just in time for our date," he explained.

"Date?" I raised one eyebrow.

"Yeah, for Tuesday," Jacob walked over to me so that his body was nearly touching mine. "That is, if you will go out with me again."

"I would love to go out with you again," I answered softly. I thought he was going to lean down and kiss me, but sadly, he just kissed the top of my forehead.

Jacob must have seen my confused expression and he just laughed before his placed his hand under my chin to lift up my face. He leaned down so that his lips hovered right next to my ear. "When I kiss you for the first time, Miss Swan, it will not be in between lanes three and five." He kissed my forehead one last time before placing me in cab and sending me off in a daze.

Jacob was so different than any other boy that I dated, probably because he was a man. But still, he was just unbelievably humble and thankful for his career. He told me that he had plans, too, for a career outside of basketball, and how he moved his dad into his house so he could take care of him. Billy, Jacob's dad, had just been placed in a wheelchair and needed some extra care. Jacob was only too happy to help.

The odd thing about all this was that I was happy. Not that I had been depressed lately or anything, but ever since Halloween I have definitely been bummed out. It was the realization that, even though I didn't like Edward, but if I did, I would not be good enough for him. And for some reason, that thought hurt me more then I wanted to admit.

I wouldn't tell anyone this, but before I went out with Andrew #2 (and realized how much of a nutter he was) I kind of put my hopes into that date as something to take my mind off of that ever-looming realization. So after the disaster, which was the "date," I sunk even further into my slight depression, not that I would let anyone know about it. If I told Alice, or if I had not acted like I normally do, there would be too many questions that I would not know how to answer. So this date with Jacob helped me in more way than one.

First off, I got to spend time with a great guy. Jacob was just that: a really great guy. Second, it really did boost my ego to know that this hottie-with-a-body was interested in me. And thirdly, it helped me avoid thinking about these questions or answers.

I was surprised to see Edward home, but was more surprised to see how excited he was. Whenever I was with him, I was always very aware of his emotions, just like when he found out he was working with Andrew Lloyd Webber and I had been jumping up and down with him before he even told me the surprise. So, at that moment my own excitement level rose just by seeing him excited.

I wanted to tell him about Jacob, and it was then that I realized that I wanted them to meet, and become friends. Two such wonderful men should be friends. And as I explained to him everything, I saw the light that was in Edward's eyes die. Just like that. In one instant, in one second, right as I finished my sentence, I saw that light diminish and his face darken.

I had seen the way Edward would look at Jasper and Emmett while they were with Alice and Rosalie. It was a look between longing for happiness and sadness. Edward and I had joked about being single and cool forever, but no one really wants that. I didn't. And even though Jacob may not be the one, I could still see this going somewhere serious, even if I did just hang out with him for the evening. I needed it to be serious so that I would not have to think about other things.

It had been a while since Edward left Lauren, and I was left to wonder just how much longer he would be single. Was there a formula to figure out how long the breakup period would last based on how long the relationship was? So that is why Edward and I worked out so perfectly as friends. We didn't have anyone else, so we leaned on each other. But I had started to see what would happen if I leaned too far into him and I couldn't allow myself that kind of rejection or humiliation, not from him, not again.

So now I was leaning away, I mean I would still be here for him, no question about that. And we would still spend a ridiculous amount of time together, but I could not depend on him being the man in my life anymore. Even though we were not romantic to each other, he was the man in my life, just like how I was the woman in his. But now, hopefully, I can distract myself with someone and help dismiss my confusion. It was a bonus that I actually liked Jacob.

Ok… I know that it sounded horrible of me to use someone like that, but it's not using when you really want to like them in the end, is it? That was what I was trying to convince myself of as I woke up. I really did have a fun time with Jacob last night, and I tried to only focus on that as I got up for my day.

I decided a pair of old, yet stylish blue jeans, and a black turtleneck were a good decision to wear for the day. I quickly brushed my hair up into a messy pony tail, and walked out of my room to the kitchen.

I was expecting to see Edward either sitting at his piano, or eating breakfast but he was at neither. So I made myself some breakfast thinking that he would be out of his room by the time I was done.

Well, one and a half bowls of cereal and a quick clean up of the dishes later, Edward had yet to come out. I walked over to his room, not quite sure why I was saddened that he had not come out yet, only to find a note taped to his door.

_I'm hanging out with the guys today. I'll be back late; don't wait up._

I could tell he was upset, not only in his body language from last night, but I could practically feel his emotions, if that made any sense. I guess it did once I thought about it. I mean, I catch onto his feelings when he is happy, so why not when he was sad? Hmm… I would have to talk with him about that later.

I felt the phone in my pocket vibrate signaling I had a text message. I smiled when I saw it was from Jacob, and tried to ignore my slight disappointment.

_I know there is a 3 day rule on calling, but is there a rule on texting?_

I laughed when I read his message, and wrote back.

_Yes, I believe it is the 33 hour rule._

_Damn, oh well I knew I was going to break one of those rules._

_Well I wish you would have broken the 3 day calling rule then._

I know I wanted what I said to be true, but I was not sure if it was.

_Trust me if I was not stuck at this meeting I would have broken that rule._

_Shouldn't you be paying attention to the meeting?_

_I was not going to be paying attention either way, so why shouldn't I not pay attention while texting you too?_

_Oh, you do know how to make a girl swoon._

_It's my specialty. Hey I just got caught, I'll call you tonight._

I smiled at his message, not because I was trying to, but because I was happy. See? It's not so hard to like someone.

Well, what would I like to do on this lovely Saturday morning? I'll call Alice. It only took her one ring before she picked it up.

"Bella!" she squealed. Wow, she was peppy this morning.

"Hey, Alice, are you busy?"

"No!!" Okay, she seriously had too much coffee.

"Are you alright, Alice?" I asked.

"I'm great," she spoke enthusiastically. "But how are you doing?"

"Actually I'm doing pretty good," I smiled as I thought about Jacob. "I think you'll be interested to know how my night went."

"AAAAAH! Okay, I'm on my way to Rose's office, she is doing some paper work right now, come over ASAP."

"Calm down, Alice, you act like you know something," I laughed.

"Well, let's just say I have a very good idea on how well your night went," she giggled. "I just have a feeling."

I rolled my eyes, "Alright, my little psychic, I'll be over in a bit."

Alice always said she had some kind of psychic feeling toward things. She would always tell us that she would have feelings about certain things and that we should listen to her more often. I had to admit, she was kind of right sometimes… most of the time. So, if she had a good feeling about my date last night, then maybe Jacob and I together was a good idea.

It was a cool, rain-free, November day, so I decided to walk. It made me about 15 minutes late, but I had a sneaking suspicion that Alice and Rose would be able to distract themselves in my absence.

The moment I walked into Rose's office, Alice jumped me while screaming into my ear. "Tell me all about last night!"

"Hold on," I pushed Alice away from me. "Let me say hi to Rose." Rose laughed as she walked over to me giving me a tight hug. "How was your trip?" I asked her.

"Oh don't worry about that," Rose guided me to the nearest chair. "Alice told me all about her feeling, and from what I hear, it seems pretty intense."

"I guess you can say that," I giggled. "But I mean it was just a really nice surprise, you know?"

"I bet it was," Alice wiggled her eyebrows and shared a look with Rose.

What was wrong with them? "Yeah, so I mean why not? He is a really great guy and I think it could turn out to be something."

"I can tell you right now that it will be more then just something," nodded Alice. "You guys are meant to be!"

"Wow, Alice, I wouldn't say that," I shifted uncomfortably in my chair. "I mean I only met him last night."

"What are you talking about?" Rose asked, and quickly looked at Alice.

"I'm talking about the date I had last night with Jacob," I looked at Alice, confusion written on both of our faces. "What are you guys talking about?"

Right as I asked that, Alice's phone, which was sitting in her lap, started to ring. I automatically glanced down and was only able to see that the name started with an E.

"Hey," Alice's voice no longer held the excitement it just had. "Yeah, I am." Alice quickly glanced at me. "No, not yet, but… ok." Alice looked at me, "Hey, I have to take this phone call for a second," and then she looked at Rose. "Don't talk about anything while I'm away."

Alice walked out of the office leaving me with a very confused Rose. I tried to make her tell me what was going on, but she wouldn't make eye contact with me and just started rambling, telling me about her flight. No more than a minute went by before Alice walked back in looking like she wanted to cry, then she looked at me with eyes that looked like she had just heard the most heartbreaking news.

"Alice, what's wrong?" I stood up and place my hands on her shoulders. "Is everything ok?"

Alice bit her lip, something which she never did, and forced a smile on her face. "Yeah, everything is great; I was just talking to a client. So, tell us about Jacob."

I knew that there was something Alice was hiding from me, but if she didn't want to tell me, but I would not push it. I spent about ten minuets talking about Jacob, and after Rose's and Alice's earlier reactions, I couldn't understand the solemn looks on both of their faces.

I asked them if they wanted to hang out since the boys were spending the day together. Alice quickly told me that she and Rose would be busy for the rest of the day, which left me alone in the apartment again.

The good weather quickly turned into a light storm, which was enough to keep me trapped inside. I normally didn't mind being alone, but for some reason I felt very uncomfortable. Like I knew that there was something wrong, and I couldn't fix it. Or at least know about it.

Like Jacob had promised, he called me right as I was getting ready for bed. I told him about my friends, and he asked me endless questions about each one of them. He was particularly interested in Edward and our history. I gave him the quick version, but he still caught on that Edward had hurt me in high school. Even after I stressed to him how Edward was a completely different person now, and how he apologized to me time and time again, Jacob still insisted that I had been too nice of a person.

The next day I was met with another note from Edward, saying that he would be gone all day again, only this time he said he was out working on his next piano composition. I made my round of text messages and phone calls to everyone, asking if they wanted to hang out, and I received a series of kind rejections. Okay, they weren't rejecting me; they probably all were really busy, and had a lot to do.

I was not in the mood to go outside so I just lolled around the place. Luckily, by lunch time Jacob had called me again. We talked for hours straight without interruption. He called me around one, and we didn't hang up until four. Then at eight he called me again and talked until I fell asleep at ten.

I was excited when he told me that he would be staying in Seattle for a while, especially when I got e-mails or text messages from everyone saying that they were going to be busy during this week, as well. Having them all busy at the same time like that hadn't happened before, but it was bound to occur eventually. At least I had Jacob there to entertain me now.

Tuesday couldn't come by fast enough. I had spent all of Monday just moping around waiting for Jacob's call. It was crazy how well we got along. If we had just met on the street I was sure that we would have become instant friends then, too.

"So you were just so excited to see me that you had to call and make our plans earlier?" Jacob grinned at me as we sat in the pizza parlor.

"That or I would have gone insane if I didn't spend time with another human bean," I grinned right back.

When I woke up and got another note from Edward saying that he would be gone all day, I called up Jacob and told him that we would be spending the day together again. Normally I would not be so direct, or push myself onto someone like that, especially not someone who I just started dating, but I was just so mad. I had every right to be mad… right?

"So what do you want to do for our day together?"

"How about we go see a movie? That seems very date-esque," I smiled.

"Yeah," Jacob nodded his head. "And after that we can buy you a dictionary so you can come up with better words."

Jacob insisted that we walk to the theater. It was not raining so I couldn't come up with a reason not to, except for the fact that I was freezing my ass off. But I ignored my hypothermia and walked in a comfortable silence with Jacob. I was worried that he would grab my hand like Andrew did, but Jacob never made a move, much to my relief.

"So not that I don't love that you called me up," Jacob started, but sounded the slightest bit hesitant, "but from what it sounded like on the phone, you are hardly away from your friends. And yet here you and I are, not to mention the hours of phone calls this weekend."

"They're busy." That was what they told me, and why shouldn't I believe them? It is not like they are hiding something from me.

"You don't really sound convinced," stated Jacob mater-of-factly.

"It is not like I think they are lying to me or anything," I paused trying to figure our how to voice my theory. "I feel like there is something wrong… and they won't tell me."

"You think they are blaming you for whatever it is?"

"No, I mean if they are hiding something from me, then they have a good reason for it. The last time they got all distant from me was my birthday, and they threw me a surprise party." I smiled as I thought back to the party; it had everyone who I cared about in one room. What more could I ask for? "But I can tell it's different this time, that…whatever they are hiding is not a good thing like my party."

Jacob looked at me with a serious expression, "I'm sorry that you feel like that is happening to you." He paused as if trying to carefully word what he was going to say next. "But maybe it is a good thing that I'm here while this is happening- that at least I can distract you."

We had been taking a short cut through Albert Davis Park, walking along the large trees that shielded us from the warmth of the sun, and created a secluded feeling. We were not on a main path, so we hadn't seen anyone walk by us in quite a while, making me feel even more excluded from the world.

I didn't mind being separated from everything; away from my friends who were hiding from me, away from a world where love seemed hopeless, and away from the embarrassment to how I reacted to Edward. Sure, Jacob was incredibly good looking, but he seemed to be a little more obtainable then Edward. Why would a girl like me ever be with a man like him? No, I need to get him out of my mind, and focus on what I have in front of me; a very attractive man who was staring deeply into my eyes.

Even if his eyes didn't pierce me like another pair of green ones did, I could learn to forget about green, and focus on the brown that was leaning down towards me. Jacob had gently grabbed both of my shoulders to bring me closer to him, and I didn't fight it. I knew where this was going, and it didn't seem completely right, but it didn't seem wrong either. Why not kiss him and see what I feel?

Tenderly Jacob brushed his rough hands against the skin along my neck, sending chills down my spine, a reaction I was not expecting, yet not disowning. He cupped my face, while his thumb brushed my lips back and forth. I could feel the calluses he had from basketball on the hand that cupped my face, but I didn't mind it either; I actually relished in the feeling. It's not like I have a calluses fetish, ew. No I just like the feel of his hands because they were the feel of a man who worked with his hands.

He leaned down a tiny bit, letting me know what he was going to do, yet letting me decide whether or not to let him. I tilted my head up to him, eagerly awaiting his kiss. At this point I really was eager. I had a sneaking suspicion that he was probably a good kisser, and good kisses make you forget about everything.

Jacob closed his eyes and pressed his lips to mine. They were sort of like his hands: rough, manly, but for some reason this was a major turn on so I wrapped my arms up around his neck and started to run my hands through his hair; his neck and the strands were rough too.

I followed his pace, which was not too fast or slow- just right for a first kiss. His tongue never asked for entrance, and I was utterly disappointed, so I tugged on his hair a bit to encourage him. He got my message.

His tongue was warm, and (what else) rough, the same rugged quality that he had about him which made me press myself up against him and moan for more. By then his hands were around my back holding me up, while I clung to him. After the kiss ran its course, and we were both out of breath, we finally broke apart.

Jacob had a goofy grin on his face that reminded me of a dog; not that I'm calling him a dog, just one of those dog-like grins… if that makes sense.

"Come on," Jacob whispered as he unwrapped his arms from me and grasped my willing hand. "We're going to be late for the movie."

I smiled and nodded. It was a great kiss, much better then the once I had recently, or ever, but I couldn't help a nagging feeling that there was something lacking in the kiss. My stomach tightened as I thought about where I could find what I was looking for in a kiss. No, I will not make myself look like some kind of idiot.

I'll find that missing part in Jacob… I had to.

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I ended up spending the entire day with Jacob and, surprisingly, I did not get tired of him. How could I get tired of someone who kept me laughing? We ended up buying me one of those portable tissues because I kept laughing myself to tears. That brought us to a whole new round of hilarity.

It was nice to laugh like this again. It had been weird around Edward lately, but it was a self-imposed weirdness. So, it was good to just be comfortable with someone again. I kind of felt bad for Jacob because everywhere that we went, or whatever we would talk about, it would always remind me of a story of my friends so I would just talk about them.

By the end of the day he told me he wanted to meet my friends, so that they could pass judgment on him now, and just get it out of the way. I thought I was a great idea, if only I could get any of my friends on the phone.

It was pretty late when Jacob dropped me off. Edward still wasn't home, so I decided to call Alice knowing full well that she could not be busy at this time of the day.

"Hey Bella…" Alice answered as if she knew she was in trouble.

"Wow, you remember my name," I gaped. "I feel so honored that you could actually pick up my phone call and spend your precious time talking to me." Okay, now that was a pretty bitchy thing to say; maybe I was more upset than I let myself think.

"I deserved that," Alice spoke quietly, and I could hear the sadness in her voice.

"No, you don't. I'm sorry, Alice," I sighed. "I just miss everyone. And I know that something is up, and I get that you guys can't tell me, but I still miss everyone."

"You don't have to apologize, we are just…" Alice paused, "trying to figure some things out. I'm really sorry we left you completely alone."

"Well, not completely alone…" I trailed off hopping that she would catch to what I was leading to.

"What do you mean?" Alice asked sounding completely lost.

"Jacob, that guy I went on a date with," I explained. "I have been talking to him, and he just got back into town and we spent the day together."

"Oh, no," Alice gasped.

"What's wrong?" I asked, panicked by the Alice's tone.

"Nothing I…err… I just spilt some of my drink on my dress."

"Oh, sorry," Alice could get so worked up when it comes to clothes. I went on, "But that is part of the reason why I'm calling. Jacob really wants to meet everyone, even after I warned him about your crazy little pixy ass," I teased.

Alice laughed uncomfortably, "Wow, well that's nice. But I really don't think that…"

"Alice," I cut her off, my voice serous. "Look, I am not asking you to tell me what you're doing, and I'm not asking you to give up your first born, all I want is for my friends to meet the guy that I kind of have a thing for. Okay?"

Alice was quiet as she thought. I could hear her even, yet strained breathing. Finally she answered. "Alright, and I'll talk to everyone else. This Friday should work for all of us. How about we meet you at the PF Chang's at eight?"

"Alright," I breathed. "That sounds good."

"Bella, I miss you too, we all do, it's just…" Alice's voice grew frantic, as if she was trying to will me to understand.

"You don't need to explain," I soothed her. "I just want to know that everything will go back to normal."

"Bella, the time for normal has passed. Look I've got to go, but I can promise you that everything will turn out the way it is meant to be."

"Bye," I answered as she disconnected.

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I was not stunned the next three days when I woke up to an empty apartment, or that none of my friends had called me. I had asked Alice for reassurance that everything would go back to normal, and she had said that the time for normal has passed. What the hell did that mean?

I didn't tell Rose or Alice or anyone about my confusing thoughts of Edward. Maybe they had figured it out and they also realized how hopeless a situation that is. Oh God, if Rose and Alice both knew, then Emmett and Jasper would find out soon enough. Those girls can never keep their traps shut, at least not to their men.

I just really, really, really hope that Edward doesn't find out. What if he did find out and that is what Alice and Rose are up to? Man, all I had were a few possible thoughts about kissing him. Come on, they have got to cut me some slack here, you can't live with a guy who looks like a Greek god and not have a few wandering thoughts! It is perfectly natural!

Even though I never thought about Jasper or Emmett that way, and they are both very good looking men. Shit, maybe I am screwed. No, I have some feelings towards Jacob, I think. No, I'm sure I do. I mean that kiss certainly did have chemistry; I couldn't deny that. That's all I need to do, just focus on Jacob. I laughed to myself. Yeah like it's going to be really hard to not focus on a hot guy who is very interested in me. I think I can manage.

So, I spent the next the next several days with him. Why shouldn't I? Everyone was avoiding me, and when they see me on Friday they will see that I do not have a thing for Edward. That is the story at least.

I was definitely excited, as I got ready for my dinner on Friday. I had gotten to know Jacob much better, and I really liked what I saw. It only made sense that I would want my friends to know and like him too. Just the night before Jacob had oh so subtly let me know that he was not seeing anyone else.

"Hey," he had begun as we just finished dinner, "I just wanted to let you know that I'm not dating anyone else, just you. And I want it to be just you. We don't have to put a label on this or whatever, but I just wanted to let you know."

He stared at me, waiting for me to respond. "Hmm… so should I go let all the other guys I'm dating know that it's off? I mean I might want to start calling them now so hopefully I'll be done before midnight."

So we were not boyfriend- girlfriend, but we were not seeing anyone else. That is definite progress. Jacob said that it would be best if he met us at the restaurant instead of picking me up, so if I wanted it to just be my friends then he could sneak out. I didn't like this plan. The whole reason why we were all having dinner was so they could meet him. But at least he was very considerate towards me.

I wore a simple black long sleeved dress that hugs my waist, yet flared out to my knees. It was finally cold enough that I would wear my knee length boots. They were probably the only fashionable shoes that I liked which were heeled. I know, a person should not like a death trap, but on cold fall nights like these I loved them.

I felt nervous the whole ride to PF Chang's. They were just my friends, and it was just a guy that I was sort of seeing, and it is just Edward, the guy you almost kissed. Oh yeah, no need for nerves at all.

After quickly handing my keys to the valet, I made my way inside and headed in the direction the hostess pointed me toward. In the far corner of the restaurant I could see Emmett's large build in the shadows. As I got closer I could make out each shadow.

"Bella!" Emmett boomed, being the first to see me.

"Hey guys!" it was so good to see them. I hadn't realized just how lonely I had been, so I gave them all hugs.

Rose looked amazing in her black collared shirt and a red pencil skirt, with matching bright red lips. Emmett sat right next to her, in a blue button up shirt and blue jean pants. I felt a little out of breath after hugging Emmett; he can get a little excited and forget his strength. Or he was just being mean. Both were strong options.

Jasper pulled me in a side hug and whispered a "missed ya kid," to me before Alice pulled me into a tight hug. But there was something different in Alice's grip, it felt like she was trying to say more than just a hello. Finally I turned to where I thought Edward would be.

"Where is Edward?" I asked in a tone crossed between anger and sadness.

"Oh, well he had a meeting to go to," Emmett answered in an uncomfortable, yet serious tone as he took a drink out of his glass.

"On a Friday night?" I laughed skeptically.

"Yeah, well, they are producers and they wanted to have dinner with him to get to know him better," Emmett lifted his menu and focused on it probably more then he should have; oh that boy and his love for food. "He said he was really sorry he couldn't make it."

"Oh," slumped in my chair. "I just wish he would have told me himself." I really did miss Edward. Even if I was dealing with these thoughts that made absolutely no sense, I still would have dealt with the confusion as long as I could have seen him.

"So, who is going to make the introductions?" said a low, friendly voice from behind me, making me tear my thoughts away from Edward.

"Jacob!" I stood up and gave him a quick kiss as he snaked his arm around my waist. From the moment I first kissed Jacob, he would always either try to hold my hand, or put his arm around my shoulder. He said it was because he was just an affectionate guy, which I could believe because he never tried any more then that.

I turned back to my friends to see them all wearing similar expressions; as if they were shocked and/or saddened. "Come on guys, why do you all look like that?" I laughed awkwardly.

"Nothing," Emmett spoke up. "I was hopping that you made him up or something, like back in high school… or something." Emmett stood up and put his hand out for Jacob. "Emmett Cullen, self assigned big brother of Bella."

Jacob returned the firm handshake, "Jacob Black, self assigned man to be pursuing Bella, and sucking up to her friends."

"Hi, I'm Rose," she introduced herself, walking around from behind Emmett. I was pleased to see that Jacob's eyes didn't bulge out of his head.

Instead Jacob just smiled, "Bella said you're into cars- I built my first car. It is good to meet a fellow car freak."

Jasper stood up to shake his hand, "Hello, I'm Jasper Whitlock."

"Hey Jasper, you work at the museum right?" Jacob smiled his friendly smile, which I truly believe that no one could resist.

"Yes I do."

"I was just over at the museum in New York. It's crazy how they have an actual pyramid there, but I prefer the museums that do not steal their pieces."

Jasper nodded in agreement, "I completely agree, that's essentially part of my job."

"Interesting," Jacob actually sounded as if he was truly interested. "I would love to hear more from you."

Alice stepped up to Jacob, she looked very uncomfortable and not like the friendly outgoing girl I know and love.

"And you must be Alice," Jacob held out his hand.

Alice looked at him, as if questioning whether or not to take it. _Why was she being so difficult about this?_

"Hi," Alice grabbed his hand. "It is nice to meet the person who has been distracting our Bella while we have been busy."

"I don't mind at all," Jacob glanced over to me and smiled. "I actually hope you're busy more often."

We all settled down in out seats, and I was relived that the introductions had gone alright.

"Hey, we're missing someone here," Jacob looked around the table. "Edward, right?" I ignored how my breathing stuttered when he mentioned his name.

"He is busy with a meeting dealing with work," Alice answered. And that was that.

The dinner went well enough… they were not rude to Jacob. They all talked to him, asked him questions, answered his own, but they never really went out of their way to make conversation with him. I threw glares at everyone (minus Jacob) signaling that they better clean up their act.

And Jacob really did try to get the ball rolling. With each of them it seemed like he started a perfectly fine conversation but then half way through they would have a look of realization, and then kill the discussion. It was almost painful to watch. I told him how open and friendly they all were, but here they were, acting the complete opposite.

Finally dinner ended, and I linked my arms with Rose and Alice as we walked out to the parking lot.

"You two owe me an explanation," I whispered through my teeth. Luckily Emmett and Jasper had decided to be nice to Jacob, bombarding him with questions about the NBA.

"An explanation about what?" Rose looked at the tennis bracelet on her wrist.

"Do not play dumb with me," I even shocked myself with how much it sounded like a growl. "I told Jacob that I had the best friends that anyone could ask for, because they were nice, honest, friendly people; and you guys completely proved me wrong tonight."

Both Alice and Rose stopped to face me, and they looked ashamed. "I'm sorry, Bella," Alice started.

"Yeah, we really didn't mean to be so… mean," Rose hung her head.

"We are just really protective of you; you are our only Bella," Alice offered a small smile. "All any of us want is for you to be happy."

Before I would be forced to answer if I was happy or not, Jacob called me over. I quickly gave a hug to all of my friends and smiled when they told me that they were sorry and we would go back to hanging out again this weekend.

Jacob was leaning against my car, waiting patiently as I said to goodbye to everyone. I walked over to him with an apologetic smile. "My friends were horrible," I whispered as I wrapped my arms around his neck, while he held onto my waist.

"No, they were fine, just protective," he shrugged.

"I'm sorry, they will be on much better behavior."

"I'm winning them over; I mean come on, who can resist my charm?" Jacob smirked with a smug grin.

"I believe I can," I grinned right back.

"Hmm, well let's put that to the test." Jacob leaned down and kissed me, making it hard to concentrate on anything. He leaned away and just rested his head on top of my own.

After a few minutes he finally spoke. "I still have to meet Edward."

I smiled at his name, "Edward is a really great guy; I hope you like him."

"I like you," Jacob kissed my forehead. "Which means I like anyone you tell me to."

"Really?" I looked up at him with innocent eyes. "So if I tell you that I absolutely love Billy Bob Thornton…"

"Then I'd say bring on Bill-Bob!" he laughed. "I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow." He kissed me one more time, leaving my head in that very nice fog.

It was a nice fog, but not thick enough to keep me from thinking. I know they said that Edward was at a meeting with a producer, but why did I feel like they were lying? I was hurt, angry, and annoyed that Edward would be avoiding me like this. If there was something wrong then couldn't he just talk to me? We had been through a pretty intense couple of months; I thought that counted for something….

My thoughts continued to bring down my mood as I walked down the familiar hallway to the apartment. But I heard a soft melody as I neared the door. Edward was home, playing the piano, I could hear him from the other side. He must have come home early from his meeting.

I had never heard this song before, at first I thought it was about me because the notes sounded almost like mine, but there was something different about it, as if he was holding down one of the pedals, intensifying the sound. I wanted to hope it was about me, that this beautiful lullaby that made me want to cry out just because of its heart and passion. But my note was not this strong, it was not about me.

He stopped in the middle of the song, and I panicked, thinking he might have somehow known I was lurking in the hall. Instead I heard him walk away, towards his bedroom I think, and close a door.

I opened the door and snuck into my room trying not to make any kind of noise. Whoever inspired that song for Edward had sparked a kind of passion that I had not heard in anything he had written, not even the song about our separation in high school.

No, this song had more passion; it had love. And I was not, and will not ever be, the inspiration for that song. Why did that make me want to cry?

My phone buzzed in my pocket telling me I had a text message.

_I can't sleep, talk to me?_

I wiped off the few unruly tears that managed to escape as I walked to my bed. I threw myself on the comfort of my mattress and called Jacob.

* * *

**I am hopping that you guys can see her how her mind is working. She is kind of acting immature, but I feel that in certain situations we tend to revert.**

**I am on the verge of sleep so I am probably forgetting something, and if I do I'll just update my page on Wednesday night.**

**Next chapter is called: Fight**

**It will be in Edward's POV, and I promise that things will go back to being more on the humor side of things in a few chaps. But life is not always funny so i have to write some serious stuff.**

**Ok, I'm off to bed now**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	16. Fight

**Chapter 16- Fight**

**Hey everyone, I'm sorry I am behind, but midterms man, they are a hard one. Good news is that I kicked butt. So yay.**

**Thank to everyone, the readers, the reviewers, my betas. You guys all rock.**

**So lets just get right to this, shall we?**

**I do not own Twilight**.

* * *

Chapter 16- Fight

EPOV

She was with him last night. They were spending time together again. I don't know what they do, and oh God I don't want to know what they do. But I need know, because there is that sick masochistic side of me that needs to know if he has touched her they way I want to touch her.

Has he stroked her delicate face and felt how her soft skin rivaled rose petals in texture. Has he focused so deeply into her eyes that he would find a new world, a new reality where she is everything? Has he somehow managed to get close enough to her that he can smell the sent of strawberries in her hair?

Has he kissed her?

I can't think of that, but I still can't stop imaging his lip on hers. Bella told me who he was, so I Googled him. He wasn't like Mike who still looked like he was going through puberty, no this guy is a man. That pissed me off. He was taller then me, and almost as built as Emmett, which mean that he was most likely strong enough to protect Bella. And that enraged me.

Has he… has he, slept with her?

No Bella would not have sex with someone that she only started dating; but what if he pressured her into it? Then I would kill him with my own hands. But they were not sleeping together; at least I don't think so. I punched the pillow on my bed. I need to get a punching bag; I can't keep taking this out on my pillow. It was six in the morning, another night of restless sleep. With a sigh I rolled off my bed and grabbed the always-ready gym bag.

I grabbed my cell from my nightstand and saw that I had four new text messages from last night.

**From Jasper: I'm sad to say that he is not a horrible guy.**

**From Emmett: Dude, he is sort of, kind of, maybe cool… sorry**

**From Rose: You better go talk to Bella, she is getting way suspicious of you.**

**From Alice: Have faith.**

That's right, they all went out with Bella and _him_. I could have gone, probably should have gone, but I couldn't see Bella with him. I actually haven't seen her all week – at least not when she was awake. It may seem a little stalker-ish but right before I would leave in the morning I would pop my head in her room just to see her.

If I thought that Bella going out with someone else was painful, I was wrong; not seeing or talking to her was painful. Oh God, what I would give to hear her voice or laugh? It felt like too long.

But how could I see her knowing that I love her, and knowing that she does not love me? She knew me too well, and would be able to tell that there was something wrong. And I love her even more for that.

I shoved my cell in pocket, not wanting to respond. It was embarrassing enough that they all knew my predicament; at least it was not as bad as when I had to face them all after Bella's date.

Sleep had avoided me that night, not giving me the peace of unconsciousness. So I left the apartment before Bella could wake up, leaving her some excuse for my absence; I couldn't remember what I put - I just left, and walked for a very long time. I didn't know where I was going, and I didn't care. I just walked until my legs started to burn and finally noticed that I had ended up in a park, the rain softly patting my shoulders as if it was trying to consol me.

Great, even nature now knew how pathetic I am, at least my friends don't… No! Alice!

I dug in my pocket for my cell and dialed her number. It took a few rings before she picked up. "Alice!" I practically yelled.

"Hey," her cheeriness sounded strained.

"Are you will Bella?" Please say no, oh please say no.

"Yeah, I am."

Shit. "Have you told Bella about my feelings, or what happened last night?"

She paused, "No, not yet, but…"

I cut her off. "I need you to leave the room."

"Ok," she leaned away from the phone, but I could still hear what she was saying. "Hey I need to take this phone call for a second." The tone in her voice had a hint of seriousness. "Don't talk about _anything_ while I'm away." I heard a few more ruffling noises fallowed by a door closing. "Edward, what is going on?"

I sighed heavily. "She came home last night and I was about to tell her when she started to go on and on about her amazing date, and how great that guy was." I couldn't talk about that, my throat was clogged with regret.

"Oh Edward, I'm so sorry," it sounded like she was trying not to cry.

"No, it's fine…" that was all I was able to say before I slumped my head down into my free hand. "Look, I'm going to go; I just need to be alone…"

"No!" she screamed. "You can't, you're going to go back to not caring, and separate yourself from us. You can't go back to being zombie Edward!"

"I'm not going to revert," I could hear the lie in my voice. "This is different," at least that was true.

"Yeah, it's even worse now." She waited for me to respond, but I wouldn't say anything. "Edward, you are in love with Bella, you said that she was the one for you. And you have to live with her, and she doesn't know that you love her, and she is going out with someone else. So yes this is a lot worse and I will not let you go and destroy yourself again."

"Alice… how?" everything seemed so hopeless.

"Let us help you," she whispered. "Go to my apartment, and we will all meet you there."

"Alright," I breathed.

I had to figure out where I was before I could head over to Alice's, turns out I was on the complete other side of town (no wonder my legs started to hurt).

I probably should have taken a cab, but there was something comforting about walking in the rain. No one could see the pain written on my face. It took me about an hour before I knocked on the familiar door,

"Come in!" I heard Alice's voice call out.

The moment I opened the door, I wanted to turn around and walk right back out.

"Oh no you don't Eddie," Emmett smiled. "I'll just go and drag your ass back here."

Emmett stood like a mountain in the background as he leaned against the couch, furthest from me. Rose was standing a few feet in front of him a very worried look on her face. Jasper was to my right, but still out of arms reach. Alice was the closest one directly to my left and grabbed my hand before I would run.

"What is this, an intervention?" I scoffed.

Alice gently pulled me to the couch and sat me down as everyone took a seat around me. "We all love you Edward," Alice continued. "And we are here to help you."

"You guys, I'm fine," internally I cringed at the hard sound of my voice.

"Oh just cut the crap Edward," Rose threw her hands up in the air and sat on the coffee table directly in font of me. "So let's get straight to the point; you have finally discovered your feelings for Bella, and right as you are about to tell her, she goes off and finds another man."

"It's not her fault that I'm an idiot for not telling her soon enough," I defended.

"Ok whatever," Rose dismissed me. "But the point is you have a history of going to the shits when things start to get rough."

"We are concerned about you, and just want to make sure that you don't to the 'shits' as Rose had so delicately put it," Jasper looked at me and smiled a comforting smile that I have known since out teens.

"But I like the shits, I don't feel anything," I whispered more to myself then anyone.

Alice moved to sit next to me, and held my hands while her stare bore into me. "Edward, we can't let you go back to that. You need to feel. Are you telling me that now you know you are in love with Bella, you are willing to give that up? Because I know I would never give up the way I feel about Jasper."

"But it's different!" I pulled my hands away and tried to ignore the hurt look on Alice's face. "He loves you back, you guys are going to get married, and you will live your happily ever after!"

"And who says you can't have that too?" Rose asked.

"Because she does not love me back!" the burning pain ripped through my chest as I said the words out loud.

"Hey," Jasper spoke in a soft voice, but he still called everyone's attention. "You just need to take this one step at a time. For right now, don't focus on what Bella may or may not feel; focus on pulling yourself together."

"Yeah man," Emmett nodded. "We will all be here with ya."

"And I promise to kick your ass when you start going down that depressing tunnel," Rose smiled, telling me that she was dead serious.

"Have faith," was all Alice said.

When I left them to go head back home, I realized just how embarrassing this situation really was. I needed my friends to come take care of me, because I was too stupid to realize that I was in love with my best friend before she found someone else.

If I had just realized it a day sooner…

I said that I was going to accept their help, but I planned on hiding out the next day. But they found me… they always found me. The first day I decided to skip out on their little "help Edward" time, and decided to just get lost again seeing as it did so well for me the first time. I am still not sure how they did it, but somehow they managed to find me. I didn't even know where the hell I was.

Alice was the one to find me. She gave me dirty looks and mumbled to herself incoherent angry noises. Once we got to her car she shoved me into the passenger seat with a surprising amount of force.

We didn't do much for that day; they all just took turns babysitting me. I had threatened, even started to leave, but was instantly tackled by Emmett. I was embarrassed at first that they all felt like they needed to protect me from myself, but my embarrassment soon turned to anger. I was an adult, not some child that can be locked up. How did they know I would act the same as when I broke up with Lauren? I could be healthy; I'm not that dramatic.

"Yes you are," Jasper had said to me with a warm smile as I expressed my complaints. This was on day two of Edward lockdown. "Come on Edward, you overreact to everything. Remember when your goldfish died when we were kids?" I just glared up at him. "You demanded that everyone, friends and family, were not allowed to eat fish out of respect," Jasper started to laugh. "Face it man, you overreact to everything."

It wasn't really house arrest or anything. I was allowed to go anywhere I wanted as long as someone came with me, and that is how I started going to they gym more. I needed to get out my frustration some way, might as well take it out on the punching bag.

It was Monday evening when I recognized what the pain in my heart was telling me; it had been three days since I had spoken to Bella. I had seen her while she slept, but I had not heard her voice. She was not like a drug to me, no, a drug is to feed an addiction. Bella was like the rhythmic pulse in my veins, the air in my lungs that I needed to survive. But I knew that it was too soon to see Bella, especially when this pain was still so fresh.

But everyone in our little group had been with me when they were not at work. Had Bella been alone these past few days?

Oh God, I had been selfish. I had come to accept and even embrace the comfort and help that all my friends were giving me, but at what price? I knew her; she was probably suffering not being with her self-proclaimed family. She was most likely wondering what was going on, and what had happened that would make her friends to just leave her like that.

The next day I approached Alice about my concerns.

"Don't worry about her," Alice had shaken her head. "She probably knows something is up, but she won't question it. Bella knows that we wouldn't just leave her hanging without telling her if we didn't have a good reason."

"But how do you know?" I sighed.

Alice took a deep breath before explaining, "It was almost Jasper's and my one year anniversary, and I freaked."

"What do you mean freaked?"

"I had never gone out with a guy for more then a year, I could always feel that they were not the one, so why waist time? But with Jasper I felt something, that thing that none of the other relationships had. So I started to question how I felt. Did I really sense that connection, or was I trying to make Jasper the one?

"So I went to Bella and Rose and explained to them. The three of us hid out for some time while I tried to sort myself out. Emmett started to wonder why Rose was not spending as much time with him, so he walked in on one of my freak out moments. He found out, and like the amazing person Emmett is, he stuck right by me."

Alice gave a sad little smile, "Poor Jasper had no idea what was going on. But he never questioned why we all just sort of ditched him for that week and a half."

"What happened?" I asked.

Alice's smile grew soft, "I started to freak because I missed him so much, I realized that he really was my other half."

"So what is the moral of this story then?" I smiled humorlessly.

"I'm just saying that Bella knows that we all love each other like family, and doing something like this does not happen without purpose."

"Great now Bella is going to know that it probably has something to do with me and her!" I rolled my eyes.

"She most likely knows that it has to do with her," Alice nodded. "But the connection to you is not there. All that she can tell is that she is not meant to know right now." Alice patted my hand. "Don't worry, after living with me for so long, she can probably hear my voice in her head saying 'everything will work out'."

I thought that everything was starting to get better, and that I would soon be able to look at Bella without completely embarrassing myself. But knowing that with the way life works; it's when you think that things are going well that they all start to fall apart. It was the phone call I got from Alice that brought me back to reality.

I don't remember how the conversation went; I ended up tuning her out half way through. But I heard all that needed to hear. Bella had been spending her time with that Jacob guy, and now she wanted all of us to meet him.

I had fooled myself; well really my friends had convinced me that there was no way Bella would be with him, that deep down was really in love with me too. I had not gone so far as to believe that she loved me, but I did have hope that she might care for me. But she was going out with Jacob, and that meant she didn't care about me the way I do her.

My friends thought that this latest blow would undo the progress I'd made, but to theirs and my surprise, I handled the new information well enough. I just took it out on the punching bag at the gym. In the few days leading up to the dinner I had to admit that I noticed an increase in my muscles. Sure I always liked to keep myself looking good, but noticing this improvement turned out to be a small bright spot amongst all the pain I'd been living with.

Which leads me to today, Saturday morning, back at they gym coated in sweat as I worked out my frustration. I told Emmett to just make up some excuse as to why I would not be there; it didn't matter to me. I had been holding out some kind of hope that this guy would be a jerk, or completely wrong for Bella, but I wasn't up to finding out first hand. Instead, I would have to rely upon my friend's opinions of this guy, and I was left to hope that they would hate him.

But life wasn't that kind to me, and instead my friends could not come back and tell me that he was an awful man. I couldn't even have that comfort.

I looked at myself in the mirror in the locker room of the gym. My hair laid flat and stuck to my head, a result of how much I had perspired. The work out shirt was almost completely soaked through, and was trying to calm my breathing.

What was I doing?

I hadn't seen Bella in a week because _I _was the idiot who didn't tell her how I felt sooner. Why was I putting her, putting me, through this just because she is happy with someone else. I love her damn it, and I would much rather see her with someone else, than never see her again. That would probably be the worst thing that could happen; to know she is with someone else, and never to be able to see her, talk with her, maybe even just the slightest, touch her.

I quickly showered and threw on whatever clothes I brought. God if only I knew I would have this revelation today I would have brought something better to wear. I really do have the worst timing with my epiphanies.

This was the first time all week that I smiled like this, like a little boy about to see Santa Clause. The anticipation was killing me and I failed to think about if she would be there or not until I came up to the door.

It was a clear Saturday afternoon, why wouldn't Bella be off with Jacob? Or would he be inside? I slid the key into the lock and slowly opened the door.

To young to live a lie

**Look into my eyes…**

**Ready set, go, it's time to run!**

The music was blaring from Bella's bedroom; I saw her in a simple pair of faded blue jeans and a black t-shirt. She was moving her head in time with the beat causing her loose, soft hair to fly around her as she walked in and out of her closet, holding a different item of clothing each time. I wondered if she was packing to go somewhere, but I didn't see a suitcase, but I did see a very large pile of clothes in the corner of her room.

At the moment she was holding up a yellow top and compared it to a bright pink top. Noticing that she was too distracted to notice my presence, I snuck into her room and turned off the CD player, earning a startled scream in the process.

"Holly shit Edward," she gasped, throwing her hand to her chest. "You scared me!"

I couldn't help but smile, she looked so beautiful. "Sorry."

Bella tossed both of the shirts a side and looked up at me with large brown eyes that looked right into my soul. "Hey stranger,"

"Hey," I wouldn't be able to get this grin off of my face even is my life depended on it if she kept looking at me like that.

"So ah…" Bella paused as her familiar blush crossed her face. "What brings you here?"

My smile faltered, she was going to want an answer as to why I was avoiding her all week. "Bella… I'm sorry, I was really…err… busy?" Great, that came out like a question; let's give her more of a reason not to believe me.

"Don't worry Edward," she laughed as she picked up the two shirts she was just holding (giving me a very nice view as she bent over). "I get that there was something that I was not meant to know about. But you're here now, right?"

I let my feet bring me closer to her. "I'll always be here Bella."

She blushed again, but didn't look away. I tightened my grip on the side of my jeans so I wouldn't be tempted to brush my hand against her face.

"So what are you doing?" I asked as I looked at the pile of clothing.

Bella sighed and tossed both of the shirts onto the pile. "My yearly clean up," she answered. "Alice always buys me so many clothes that I hardly ever use them more then once. So towards the end of the year I go through everything that I don't use and donate them to charity right before Christmas so people in need can get presents too."

As if I couldn't fall in love with her more… "Bella, you are an amazing person you know that?"

She let out a nervous giggle and shifted on her feet. "No I'm not. Anyone who had an insane amount of clothing would donate it."

"No, they wouldn't. Only someone with a heart as great as yours would be able to do that; you deserve someone equally as good." _Someone better then me_.

We were quiet for a few seconds before Bella spoke up, "I'm bummed that you didn't make it to the dinner last night."

"I'm sorry I was… busy." I looked away and took a few steps back.

"Yeah, Emmett told me you had a meeting with some producers," nodded Bella. "How did that go?"

So _that_ is what Emmett told her. "The meeting was really good." It wasn't a complete lie. I did have a meeting with some producers just a few days ago, and that went well enough.

"It sucks because I haven't seen you all week," Bella looked back at me, a soft smile played at her lips. "I really missed you."

"I missed you too." And that was putting it lightly.

"So you're back then?" she asked. "We get to go back to hanging out?"

"If you are available. You don't have plans with Jacob do you?" Please say no.

"No," YES!! "He is out of town," she didn't look too upset with this. "He had to go to an emergency meeting, but he'll be back on Monday."

"So I have you all to myself until Monday," I grinned.

Bella's eyes grew wide and a bright red blush crossed her face, and I couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking.

We decided to go out for lunch; we were both in the mood for Mexican. I told myself it didn't matter what kind of pain I went through, as long as I was with Bella it would be worth it. However there was nothing painful about hanging out with Bella like I thought it would be. It was almost as if nothing was different… except for the fact that I was desperately in love with her, she didn't know, and she was dating a good guy who was not me.

It was surprisingly easy to forget my hopeless situation and remember how great of a friend she was. We would talk about the smallest of topics, like the best way to cook eggs, to the bigger matters. But then she would say something funny, or smile at scene between kids, or just when she would bite her lip, and I would have to remind myself that I was just her friend, and I couldn't reach out and touch her.

After lunch we walked around the city for a bit. We were just walking into a bookstore when I got a phone call from Alice. I told Bella to go ahead inside while I took the "work" phone call.

"Where are you?" Alice demanded, and I was glad that I had decided to not take this call in front of Bella. "I have been looking everywhere for you. Jasper said that the gym saw you there for a few hours, and Emmett is looking in all the parks, Rose is looking in all the music places that you could be, and I'm here freaking out because I knew, I just knew that you would go back to being zombie Edward, because you are just so damn dramatic!"

"Alice?" I smiled.

"Just tell me where you are, I'll send someone to go get you and so help me God, I will beet the crap out you if…"

"Alice" I laughed. "I'm out with Bella." I didn't say anything else as I allowed her soak in what I just said.

"No way!" she squealed. "Did you tell her then? Are you guys together?"

"No, I didn't tell her," my tone was sour. "We are just two friends hanging out."

"But just yesterday you said that seeing her would be too painful, what happened?"

"I realized that not seeing her at all would be even more painful," I sighed. "I know it's pathetic, but whatever time I can get with Bella I'll take. I'm too selfish a person to give her up completely, even if this will just end up hurting us both."

"What do you mean hurting both of you?" asked Alice.

"Come on, unrequited love hurts one party, then that party becomes bitter and ends up hurting the other party." Then I added sarcastically, "You've seen the movies; this never ends well."

Alice paused before answering. "Edward, do you really think you could hurt Bella?"

"I have already hurt Bella," I growled. "I can't afford to do that again."

"But that was different," Alice interrupted. "_You're_ different."

"Pain is pain, and I was the cause, just like I will be the cause this time around." I ran my fingers through my hair. "I shouldn't have come back, I should… I should…"

"Damn it Edward!" Alice yelled. "All I did was call to see where you were." She let out a frustrated breath. "You over think things way too much. Just focus on the moment, focus on the now."

"The 'now'?"

"Yes, like right now you are spending time with the woman you love who also is a good friend. Just enjoy that 'now'."

Just think about the now…

Alice continued, "Like right _now_ you could be spending time with the woman you love, but instead you are talking to me and acting like a little bitch."

"Alice!" I half gasped half laughed.

"Well you are," I could hear her smile. "Now get your ass back with her and just live in the now!"

"I will, thanks Alice."

"Any time," she spoke softly.

The rest of the day with Bella was amazing. I ended up buying her a couple of books behind her back, only to get chewed out when she realized what I did. We made such a scene in the store that the manager had to ask us to leave, only to realize that it was Isabella Swan, and then he asked for an autograph. We laughed about the bookstore all the way back to the apartment where we had a random movie night.

Random movie nights are when you take all your movies, mix them all up on the floor; then with your eyes closed you reach out and pick them. It sounded like a good idea when we came up with it, but we didn't take into account how large our movie collection was. So we ended up alphabetizing them while we watched Men in Tights.

The next day was equally phenomenal. Bella decided that we had to do a much-needed trip to the grocery store. Once we made it to Costco, I climbed into the cart and had her push me around until we made it to a canoe display. Bella climbed into the small cart with me, sitting in between my legs, as I focused on thoughts like dead puppies so I wouldn't be so aroused. She grabbed a couple a paddles and we tried to row our way down the row. Surprisingly cart rowing is extremely difficult, so we rewarded ourselves with the best kind of pizza there is, Costco pizza.

Back at the apartment we found a Friends marathon running on TV, so we ordered some good cheap Chinese food and switched into our lounging clothes. I wore my usual sweat pants and wife beater, while Bella changed into a navy blue PJ pants, and a thin light pink spaghetti strap shirt. I have seen her a thousand times in outfits like these, but how could I not have _noticed_ her before? The way the soft color of her shirt made her skin seem even more delicate, or how the way she messily pinned her hair up, with loose strands framing her face; so many little things that I missed before, but now remind me of how much I love her.

I was so content in this world of ours that I forgot about reality until her cell phone rang. "Hey Jake!" she smiled as she answered the phone. Bella looked up at me and mouthed 'one minute' while she held up one figure and walked off to her room and closed the door behind her.

Then the questions started.

Why did she need to take that phone call away from me?

What were they talking about?

Would she mention that she spent the entire weekend with me?

Would he care?

Has he heard of me?

Would things change when he comes back?

Would I have less time with her?

Oh God, I think I'm getting a migraine.

Before I could obsess over anymore unspoken questions Bella came back into the living room with a smile on her face. I knew that _he_ was the one who caused her to smile, and that made a fire burn in my chest.

"So how is he?" I asked looking down at the floor, not being able to look her in the eyes or able to say his name.

"Jake's good, he is coming back tomorrow," Bella smiled although I though I saw something lacking in it. Yeah, my sanity; I was seeing things.

"That's nice," what else am I supposed to say? I heard Bella shift in her seat on the couch while I focused on the orange chicken on my plate.

"Are you busy tomorrow?" she asked.

She was asking me if I was busy, which meant that she wanted to hang out again tomorrow! So even if Jacob was coming back, she wanted to spend time with me!

"No, I'm completely free," I tried not to sound too eager. I looked at her face for the first time and saw her break into an instant smile. This smile had whatever was missing.

"Great! The news said that there was going to be a major storm tomorrow, and well you know how I get," she blushed.

Was she asking spend the day in bed with me, because I would be more than happy to satisfy that request.

"Anyway," she continued. "I was hopping you could chill with me for the day."

"Of course I will Bella." I would do anything for her.

Her face was practically glowing with her smile. "For dinner I was thinking that maybe Jacob can come over and we all go out for dinner, so you guys can meet?"

I focused on keeping my facial expression from changing. I already said that I was available, so she knew if I said anything now that I was specifically trying to get out of it. I took a breath before answering. "That sounds like fun."

Bella's face softened as her eyes bore into me. I kept my face unreadable.

"Alright then," she nodded.

Bella was right; there was a monster of a thunderstorm the next day. And I had been almost right; although she didn't want to spend the day in bed with me, she hardly left my side. Not that I minded. It was nice knowing that she sought this comfort from me, when she could so easily go to Jacob's, or even to Alice's. It still amazed me how frightened she was. When I asked her if there was ever a cause, she just shrugged and said she has always been scared.

I played a few songs on the piano to try and calm her down, but the storm was going at full force as she locked onto my arm keeping me from playing. So I migrated us to the couch and popped in a move so she would get too distracted to notice the storm.

My arm wound around her, as she formed into my side, fitting perfectly. I was abusing this moment - I knew. I should have been a gentleman and made sure that there was some sort of distance between us. Instead I held her close, trying not to chuckle every time she would jump when the thunder would crash. _This is how I wanted to spend all stormy days for the rest of my life._

But once again reality was not on my side, and I was reminded that I needed to get dressed for the night's dinner. How does one dress when they are about to meet the man they hate while trying not to show it? I decided to wear a nice brown button up shirt, with slacks. It seemed to be neutral enough.

The moment I stepped out of my room, Bella popped her head out from behind the door, shielding her body. I couldn't help but imagine what she was concealing.

"Edward, I'm being such a girl right now and I'm running late," she looked me up and down and smiled. "You look nice though."

"Thanks," I looked at her hair pinned in rollers. "That is a new look for you."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Look, Jacob is going to show up pretty soon, let him in and entertain him please?"

I hope she wouldn't be able to tell how fake my smile was. "Yeah, will do." I walked into the kitchen and made myself a drink. In order to get though this night I was going to a drink, or two…or three…

The doorbell rang and my heart sank. Well, here it goes, I thought.

I opened the door and saw my worst fear. He was taller then me, and almost as thick as Emmett. His skin was dark which gave him some kind of exotic look. He was unfortunately good looking, and had a large smile on his face demolishing my hope that he'd be some kind of jerk. He had on a dark red silk button up shirt on and black pants that looked like they were straining at the seams.

He was obviously expecting Bella to answer the door as he held out a bouquet of roses out for me.

I cocked an eyebrow, "Sorry, but I prefer freesias."

He realized that I was not Bella and frowned, then started to laugh. "My bad, I thought you were Bella."

"I get that a lot, I think it's our hair." So I guess I was going to be sarcastic then.

"You're Eddie right?" he stuck out his hand. "Jacob Black."

"I go by Edward," I took hold of his grasp and shook hard. I might not have been as big as him, but I still had muscles.

"Sure, sure," he walked into the entry. "So where is Bella?"

I hated the way he felt so at home here, "She is getting ready. I have been assigned to entertain you."

"Well don't look so happy about it," he laughed.

I walked to the sitting room, no point for him to getting comfortable in the living room.

"So you play the piano right?" asked Jacob as he eyed my piano.

"I do," I nodded. "I have been signed onto the same agency as Bella."

"Hmm, I thought that playing the piano was more of a chick thing," he shrugged.

I felt myself stiffen. "It is equal to both genders. Many of the world's greatest composers have been men."

"Yeah, like that death guy," Jacob quickly dismissed. "So that is your piano?"

"Yes it is, Bella got it for me," I said with pride. "We are very good friends."

"I heard that you messed something up in some other city you use to live in and had to run away." I swore it looked like he was trying not to grin.

"Bella told you that I 'messed something up'?" I asked sarcastically; Bella would never say that.

"Not in so many words," he shrugged. "But come on, something goes down with your girlfriend, then you run away to a different city. You obviously messed up somewhere."

Yeah, I let you in the apartment.

"You clearly do not know what you are talking about," I spoke through my teeth. "I did not mess up."

Jacob finally grinned, then looked me square in the eye. "But you ran away." It wasn't a question.

"Hey guys!" Bella's voice rang out as she walked into the room. Jacob and I both stood up once she entered the room. She looked amazing in a dark green knee length dress, and brown boots that went up to her knees. "How was your flight?" She asked as she gave Jacob a quick hug. He was evidently leaning in to kiss her. I didn't fight my grin.

"It was too long," he stuck out the flowers. "Here, got these for you."

"Aw, that's so sweet," Bella smiled as she breathed in the scent of the bouquet. "I have a vase in my room that will be perfect for these. Give me a minute, then we can all head out for dinner." Bella turned on her heal and went right back into her room. I loved the way her hair brushed against her back as she walked.

"So Edward," Jacob's voice was much closer then it should have been. I whipped around and saw Jacob with his hands in his pockets and a cross between a smile and a glare on his face. "She is not yours," he stated simply.

"What are you-"

"Don't play dumb with me," he cut me off, his expression now a full glare. "I've only known her a little over a week, and I'm already crazy about her. I wouldn't know what I would do if I had to live with her too." A cocky smirk played on his face, "Well, actually I can think of a few things I'd like to do with her…"

"What are you saying?" I growled. He actually looked a little startled and I could only imagine what I looked like. I have been told that can get scary when I'm angry.

Jacob quickly recovered and went back to that smile/glare. "I'm saying that she is mine, and it's pretty obvious that you've got it for her too. So you better just back off and let both of us do our thing, or many things."

"Don't talk about her like that!" I spat. I clenched my fist and painfully forced myself not to start a fight him right here.

"What, you don't like the plans I have?" Jacob grinned. "You're just the friend and will never be more, I'm the boyfriend, and I get to do that with her."

"Fuck you," I hissed.

"Oh, someone will be fucking me, I promise."

Before I could throw him up against the wall, and beat the crap out of him, Bella came back and smiled at the both of us. As we walked out the door Bella slipped her hand into mine and asked me if I was ok. I nodded and said I was feeling a little ill. She squeezed my hand and whispered for me to feel better before Jacob walked over the other side of Bella and threw an arm around her. He grinned at me as she let my hand go.

Dinner was painful. We all talked and were civil with one another, but whenever Bella was not looking, Jacob and I would just glare at each other. I even hated to admit that he was treating her decently. But I could not get the insinuations that he made out of my head. It is what couples do; I could not hold it against her if she was sleeping with him. Even if it was eating me from inside out as I wished I could be the one who could do that with her. I missed my chance though. How could I blame Jacob for wanting to be with someone like Bella?

I was fortunate enough that Jacob was tired and was forced to head to back his apartment right after dinner. It was moderately early, only 10 pm, but Bella stated that she was exhausted and was going to head right to bed. I was a little disappointed that it had stopped storming, and that I would not get a midnight sleep over.

I couldn't go to sleep so I text messaged Jasper asking if he was up. He wrote back that he had a lot of paper work to do that night, and would be up for a while. I tried to be nonchalant as I wrote that I just got back from dinner with Bella and Jacob. Jasper quickly responded by insisting that I come over. Considering that I was not any better off just laying around with my own depressed thoughts, I decided to head over to Jasper's.

Once there he hastily ushered me in, and reminded me that Alice was asleep. So in hushed tones I explained to him my weekend with Bella, when Bella got the phone call from Jacob, how during the thunderstorm I held her, and then finally the meeting and going to dinner with Jacob.

"He's an ass," Jasper whispered. "He never did that to me or Emmett."

"Well he wouldn't do it to either of you, because neither of you are in love with Bella," I groaned. "But I can't hate him for wanting to be with Bella. If anything I can completely empathize with him."

"Yeah, but you would never rub it in someone's nose like he did," Jasper countered.

"He was marking his territory, I'd do the same thing." I shook my head. "I just want Bella to be happy, and if being with Jacob is what it takes for her to be happy, then I'm just going to have to step aside."

Jasper was quiet before he responded. "Is that what you really think is right?"

"Yeah… I guess I do."

"You are both such idiots!" Alice roared as she slammed the door open from her room. Jasper and I had both been so quiet during our conversation that we jumped when Alice stormed in.

"You!" she glared at Jasper. "You are no longer allowed to give advice." If I was not so frightened of Alice, I would have laughed at how Jasper obediently nodded. "And you!" she snarled at me. "You are the biggest idiot ever!"

Yeah I'm a man, but I'm not ashamed to admit that I cowered from Alice as she rounded up on me with her hands on her hips.

"Even if Jacob treats her decently, he's still a jackass to say those things to you!" she shook her head as if she was trying to shake her thoughts back into place. "You want Bella to be happy, who's to say that she would not be happy with you?" I opened my mouth to counter her, but she cut me off. "And don't give me any of the 'I hurt her in high school' bull shit, because we all know that she has long ago forgiven you for it, and it is about damn time you forgive yourself!"

She relaxed her stance and sat next to me, pleading with me through her eyes. "Edward, has Bella ever told you why she thinks guys are not interested in her?" I thought back, and the thought that the topic might have sounded familiar, but shook my head. "It is because she recognizes that guys do check her out, but no one ever asks her out," Alice explained. "She wants someone to fight for her."

I slowly started to recollect a drunken conversation I had with Bella the night we celebrated Alice and Jasper's engagement.

_"No, no, not what I mean," she hiccupped. "Guys will check out anything that walks, but do any of them fight for me? Nope."_

"_You want someone who fights for you?" I asked with my head back up against the couch, fighting to keep my eyes open._

"_I want someone to make an effort," that was the last thing I remember before falling to sleep with my head against the couch, and Bella's legs on my lap._

"You need to fight for her Edward," Alice whispered.

"But what if…"

"What if she doesn't love you? What if she hurts you? What if you hurt her? What if it isn't right?" Alice voiced my fears. "There are a lot of 'what ifs' Edward. The only question that you need to ask yourself is if you love her like you say you do."

"More," I breathed.

"Good, then you will fight for her," Alice stated.

"I might end up making a complete ass of myself," I laughed nervously. "But hell, I can't let Jacob have her, and I can't give up without a fight."

Alice had a smug grin on her face as she turned to face Jasper. "See, that is why I'm the one who gives advice."

"That is completely fine with me," Jasper wrapped his arms around Alice. "Would it be so horrible of me to say that seeing you yell like that was very sexy?"

"Yeah it would be bad to say," I laughed. "At least while I'm here. Look, I'm going to head out. I have to start strategizing my fight." I bid goodnight to both of them, and walked back to the apartment, enjoying the cool night.

I was in love with Bella, more then I could ever say or express in words or in my music. And if you love something, then you fight for it to stay in your life, and I want Bella to be in my life forever, more then just a friend.

On the ride back up the elevator I was grinning. Jacob Black was going to have some competition now.

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**Hehehe, Edward is going to fight for her now! Yay for that. I know Jacob is a tad bit OOC, but hey, it's my story and that is just how it has to be. :)**

**Now you guys all know why everyone ditched Bella. I'm surprised not that many people guessed it.**

**The reason: Edward was a mess when they first met him. They saw how he takes bad news, and if he said he never really loved Lauren and acted like that, then just think how bad he would have gotten with the Bella thing, and he knows that she is the ONE.**

**Yep so that is why. :)**

**Let's see, next chap will be again in EPOV. **

**It will be called:_ Nothing but a Little Friendly Competition._**

**Well. I hope you enjoyed.**


	17. Nothing but Little Friendly Competition

**Hello all. So yet again I have fallen behind a week, and we all know who to blame, college. :P**

**Sooo here is the next chapter, I don't think there is anything I need to update on, OH check out my profile, and there is a little something there.**

**Thanks to the readers, the reviews, and my betas!!! You all make me say, "YEAYAYSAYAYAYA" - just like that haha :P**

**I do not own twilight. But I will own a copy of the twilight movie when it comes out. WOOOOP**

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Chapter 17- Nothing but a Little Friendly Competition

EPOV

I was still juiced the next morning. Testosterone and adrenaline had taken the place of the blood that flowed through my veins. Even as I lay at rest, just awakened from a goodnights rest, my breath was still heavy. This feeling, this pulsing of my heart was the feeling of a man. I was a man about to fight for the woman that I loved. This was what men live for.

The only question was: how do I fight for her?

The best idea that I could come up with was finding Jacob, and taking him out myself in a good old fashioned show down. That is what I really wanted to do. However, it was probably not the best way to win Bella.

You hear of people fighting for the person they love, but just what the hell does that really consist of?

I need Jacob to back off for me.

I need her to fall in love with me as well.

I need her to see how much of a better choice I am over Jacob.

And I needed to get started before she falls for Jacob even further.

Not much of a check list, but still a hell of a lot to do. But first thing is first, I needed to send the message to Jacob that I'm not taking this sitting down. I could just tell him, but that didn't seem very manly. I have been fortunate enough to never really have to fight for anything in my life. Well I did have to fight for my box, but Bella had done that with me. I needed advice.

I leaned over and grabbed my cell phone and started to go through my phonebook, but when it reached Alice's number I couldn't press call. Alice had given me a lot of really good advice regarding love, but this was about a fight and this seemed to be more of a man thing. So I started to scroll down until I reached Emmett's number. He seemed plenty manly.

"What's up Eddie?" Emmett sang when he answered.

"Emmett…" I warned.

"I know, I know," he laughed. "So what's shaking my man?"

"I was wondering if we could hang out today," I paused uncomfortably. "I need advice."

"Well whatever it is, I am probably the guy to go to! But I'm about to go to the basketball court right now with Jasper. I asked him if you wanted to go with us, but he said you would probably be busy with something today." Emmett's voice became sterner, "Look I feel like I'm starting to miss a few things in the information department, so I expect the full story when you come over."

I let out a humorless laugh. "Trust me, you are going to need the full story if I'm going to need your help."

Emmett told me which park they were meeting at so I quickly changed into my black and red basketball shorts, and matching shirt. After the storm yesterday, the sky was all cleared up and looked like it was going to stay that way for the next couple of days.

I ran to the kitchen to get a water bottle and saw Bella making herself some toast. She was still wearing her PJ's, and had not combed her hair yet. It was messy and probably tangled in a few places, and I could only wish that someday soon I would be the one to make her hair a mess after a night with me.

Again the question of if she had been with Jacob popped back into my mind; but I quickly brushed it aside as I smiled a good morning.

"You going somewhere?" she asked in a voice still etched with sleep as she eyed me.

"Yeah, it's so clear the guys and I are going to go to the park and play some ball." I wonder if I could start my fight for her right now. It would be bad if I just started to kiss her without any inclination before hand. Yes bad… but very tempting.

"Cool, I'm going to go hang out with Jacob for a bit," she smiled. "You guys should ask him to play with you sometime."

"NO." Bella flinched at how sharp my voice was, and I intently regretted it. "I mean, it wouldn't be that fair of a game right? He is a NBA player." I shrugged hopping to make it seem more casual.

Bella didn't answer at first, but just eyed me as I grabbed my water from the refrigerator. "True," she nodded slowly. "I'll be back by dinner, you?"

"I'll have some meatloaf ready by the time you come home," I smiled at the idea of making her dinner.

She cocked an eyebrow and let out a little laugh with sounded like music to my ears. "You cook meatloaf all by yourself?"

"Ok, not so much as cook, but get the already made kind and warm it up," grinned crookedly. "But I'll turn on the oven all by myself."

"Ok, I'm impressed," she laughed. "I'll be back by 5. Have fun!"

Although I was grinning like a mad man when I left the apartment, I couldn't help but feel a tinge of regret. I wish I could have kissed her goodbye. Soon, I'll be able to do that soon.

By the time I reached the park Jasper and Emmett had already started a game of one on one. I sat on a metal picnic table and watched as the two went at it. For a big guy, Emmett was surprisingly very agile, yet he still could not manage to catch Jasper wheal around him.

Once they saw me, the game didn't last much longer. Or maybe it was because Emmett was loosing so badly that he wanted to end the game before he reached complete humiliation. They were both panting and laughing as they reached me.

Once the greetings were done, and the two of them opened a bottle of water, Emmett leaned his back against the table.

"So what is the advice you need from me?" he asked.

"Actually I could use advice from the both of you," I looked over at Jasper.

Jasper started to shake his head. "Sorry man, but you heard Alice last night; I'm not allowed to give advice anymore."

"Whipped," Emmett muttered.

"I'm whipped and you're on a short leash," countered Jasper.

"Yeah but luckily we both like that kind of kinky shit so it works out for the both of us!" Emmett's laughter boomed out.

After the laughing died down, I faced Emmett again, "So I should probably tell you the story."

"No need, Jasper already filled me in on the ride here." Emmett's smile turned into a very rare frown. "I thought that Jake seemed like a good guy, but he is a class A jackass," Emmett looked back at me and let out a grin. "But I'm glad to hear that you decided to fight for her. Time to man up!"

"Yeah, well that is just the problem," I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. "How the hell do I fight for her?"

"Well, you've got to deal with Jake first," Emmett nodded as he thought out loud. "Send him a message you know?"

"That is what I thought, but how do I do that?" I asked.

No one spoke for a while as we all thought about what could be done. How had men in the past handled these situations? Well in cavemen days all I would need is a club so I could knock Jacob out, and carry Bella on my back. Later on it time, they would probably literally send them a message, a request for a dual for the lady's had. Life must have been so much simpler back then.

"I got it!" Emmett snapped his fingers. "Alright, you just have to show that you are a threat to him, not just with Bella, but an all around threat."

"Great idea," mocked Jasper. "How is he supposed to do that?"

"Well if you would back off and let me get to that, than you would know." When Jasper snorted and rolled his eyes Emmett leaned closer to him with a menacing grin on his face. "I'll tell Alice that you were here in this little advice giving circle, not even a day after she told you not to."

"You're a jerk," Jasper folded his arms and looked away.

"Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted, I was going to say that I have been itching to go to the Family Fun Center for quite some time. I'll claim it as my day, so no one will suspect anything, and you just keep whipping Jacob's ass at all the games. It will threaten his masculinity and show him that you are indeed a threat."

"That is actually a good idea," blinked Jasper.

"Wow, who knew you had it in you?" I nodded.

"Ok, a good old fashioned 'thank you Emmett' wouldn't hurt," Emmett glared, although I could see his lips twitching trying to restrain a smile.

"I'll thank you when it works out," I sighed.

Emmett really did want go to the Family Fun Center, by the end of the day everyone (including Jacob) had all agreed to go. For the next couple of days Bella would spend the day with Jacob, but she would always come home to me for dinner. It's sad, pathetic, and I will probably never tell anyone, but the knowledge that Bella would always come home to me is what kept my spirit going. I would even try to fool myself by saying that she was coming home from a long days work, but reality would always win. So that means I am going to have to make reality work for me.

But Saturday I woke up at the crack of dawn. I felt like I was about to go into battle, and I was itching to go to the gym and work some of that energy off. But I settled for a long hot shower. I grabbed a pair of black jeans, and a navy blue fitted T-shirt, which showed just how much of a physical threat I really was.

Bella and I walked out at the same time, except I was the only one breathless. She looked amazing in her black skinny jeans and a forest green turtle next. But then again I had gone several hours of not seeing her, so maybe it was just her presence that made me speechless.

Everyone was meeting at the place, so Bella rode with me in my Volvo; a silent victory for me that we would show up together. I saw Jacob's obnoxious black Mercedes convertible in the parking lot as I pulled in, and thought that I should make my threat very clear when we walked up to him.

"So are you ready for some fun?" I asked Bella as we walked through the parking lot.

"If you are asking me if I am ready for a day full of amazing, then yes I am," she grinned at me.

"So you do realize that Emmett is going to go all psycho competitive play on you and try to take you out."

Bella groaned, "Why does he always single me out?"

I laughed, "It's because he loves you the most, and you the most entraining when you have a melt down."

"I am not," she glared.

"Bella, remember when you were playing checkers with Emmett, and he was getting in your head so much that you ended up making the lamest mistakes. So you wound up just chucking the pieces at him."

"Well he deserved that," she tried to fight back a smile.

"Don't worry, I'll protect you," I smiled.

"Really, you would do that for little old me?" Bella raised her voice in a high pitch, and with a southern accent.

I wrapped my arm around her shoulders, tried to look nonchalant about it, and ignore the pounding of my heart. I saw our group waiting by the ticket counter, everyone was there and watching us, even Jacob. I drew my head down closer to Bella, and whispered in her ear in such a way that if anyone had not heard what I said, they would have thought it was a moment shared by two lovers.

"Don't worry, stick with me, kid, and we'll take Emmett out."

Bella just giggled which was the exact reaction that I wanted. She still had not realized our group was there until we were right in front of them, yet even then she was looking up at me, still giggling.

Jacob's eyes looked black, and he stood rigid as he just watched Bella and mine's exchange.

"Hey Jacob," my voice sounded open and friendly, but I could tell he knew I was just mocking him. "I didn't see you there. You excited for some friendly competition?"

I winked at him and grinned. By the glare I received I could tell he got the message. It didn't even hurt as badly that Bella went over to hug him.

"Yeah I'm ready," Jacob forced a hard smile. "But just look at the place," he glanced at me up and down. "There really is not any competition going on here."

I nodded slowly with the same confident, slightly mocking grin. "Yes well that is what you believe, but this place still has a lot of… attractions."

With that I just nodded my head once and went to stand in line, passing up my friends who had looks of awe. This wasn't going to be too hard.

It was hard to resist the urge to look back to see what was going on behind me as I stood in line for tickets. I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder. "That was smooth as all hell," Emmett whispered.

"Thanks," I laughed. "Bella didn't notice anything, did she?"

"Don't think so…" Emmett glanced over his shoulder. "Rose and Alice are drilling Jasper right now… oh Rose is giving me the 'you are going to talk or I'll kill you look'."

"You recognize that type of look?"

"Dude, when it comes to me, I have to recognize looks when I'm in trouble." I laughed as he went on. "Bella is looking over at bumper boats, I think she really wants to go on those, I'm with her there, they have things to spray people with and-"

"Emmett focus!"

"Sorry man," he let out a childlike laugh. "But I wish you could see Jacob's face… man if looks could kill…"

"I'd be dead?" I asked with a grin.

"No, you would be tortured and wishing that death would come faster."

I looked up at Emmett with wide eyes. "Dude, what the fuck?"

He just shrugged, "I'm just saying he looks pissed."

My grin grew. "Good."

"I want to go do miniature golf first!" Alice cheered as she clung onto Jasper's arm.

"Everyone ok with that?" Jasper asked. We all had already bought our tickets and were standing off to the side by a cotton candy vender, which Emmett had already raided. Although I kept my focus on Jasper, I could still sense Jacob's eyes on me.

"I love mini golf," Jacob offered, his first words since our exchange. "It is one of the many things I'm good at."

"Really?" I smiled. "Want to put that to the test?"

There were only 11 holes instead of the normal 18, an odd number (literally) but at least it wouldn't drag out for too long. The line up went as is: Alice with a pink ball, Bella with blue, Rose with red, Jasper was yellow, I had a white ball, Emmett had purple, and Jacob had a black ball.

The first hole was simple enough; just shoot the ball up the little hill where the hole hid in the back far corner. Everything was all kicks and giggles as the girls went up, while I watched and figured out how best to hit the ball.

Alice missed horribly, but I had to give her credit for being able to get it up the hill. Rose couldn't get her ball up the hill and kept calling a 're-do' until she managed to get it up the hill. Bella hit her ball with a little too much energy, and it bounced up the hill landing perfectly next to the hole.

Jasper played it safe and hit the ball with just the right amount of force to get it safely on top of the hill. Emmett yelled out "four!" and hit his ball as hard as he could. I hit my ball so it landed right next to Bella. Even our golf balls looked perfect together.

Jacob's ball landed right on the other side of Bella.

The first hole, Jacob and I tied, along with Bella, fallowed by Jasper, Alice, Rose, and finally Emmett.

On the second hole, we had to get the ball over a little bridge; I wound up missing horribly, allowing Jacob take the lead.

We went back and forth like that for the next couple holes, only to be tied at the fifth hole. By then everyone had kind of backed off playing the game and just let me and Jacob do our own thing. At this point I really did not care if Bella could sense that there was a competition going on between Jacob and me, I was just focused on beating his ass.

Even Jacob was getting anxious with this game. He kept eyeing me, and then glancing at his ball. I am not sure how, but at one point we both started to breathe heavier as if we were playing a more active sport. It's golf, miniature golf at that; how much activity does it require?

Emmett and Jasper tried to give me advice at first, but I told them that if Jacob was playing without help, then so would I.

By the 11th hole we were both even. This hole would be the decider of who won and who lost.

The hole was on the other side of the limited green patch, yet along the way there were a bunch of little hills to divert our ball from its destination. I had already gone once, and figured it would be a three-part hole. However Jacob was in a tight spot and really had limited angles to the hole.

I made a clean shot, and had it set up so that on my next turn, I would win. Emmett went after me, the game might have been only about Jacob's and my competition, but the others still 'played' to pass the time.

Jacob eyed his situation and smiled. Why was he smiling? He didn't have a clean shot of the hole, the only thing he really had a good shot at was… my ball. But that would be a cheap shot.

Apparently, and definitely not to my surprise, he was not bellow a cheap shot. He hit my ball, rolling it back behind a hill that would take me several more hits before I would be able to get back to the hole.

Fuck! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"Like I said," smiled Jacob after he made his winning shot. "There are many things I'm good at."

I sighed and ran my hand threw my hair while looking around. An idea popped into my head. "Yeah, you are pretty good at golf," I smiled. "But I prefer to excel in activities where testosterone is required, and not just being good at bumping a ball."

Jacob's grin faded rapidly. "And what activities would that be?"

"I like to drive fast."

"That was perfect man!" Emmett whispered to me. "Even if he won back there you got him completely riled up!"

"I agree," Jasper nodded. "That was indeed a clever way to call for a rematch."

I nodded my head once and focused on the track. We had moved on to the other side of the park where the go-karts were whizzing their way around the track. The miniature little carts low to the ground with a large white numbers on the side of the cart over the black paint. Their clothes could only identify the racers; large bulky helmets protected their heads. I studied the turns, the slight dips, and how to spin a car out. If there were something I was going to win, it would be this.

Rose was eager to try racing, as she enjoyed speed just as much as she enjoyed fixing up the cars. At the moment she was going off on a tangent about how to improve the speed of the go-kart, while being able to fit in the limited space. Emmett was watching her as if he was falling love all over again.

Alice was also excited, like both Rose and I, she too had an addiction to speed. Jasper had his arms around her as he let her go ramble about how she would prefer not to wear the helmet, so she can feel the wind in her hair.

Bella looked a little nervous about the dips, and was shocked to see exactly how fast they were going. Jacob had an arm around her and whispered comforting words. I watched the worry slowly lift from her face, although not completely. I wanted so desperately to go over there and smooth away the line in between her brows. But that was Jacob's job, and he was reminding me by glancing over my way and giving me that smirk I have come to loath.

I handed my ticket to the teenage boy standing by the entrance, grabbed the helmet that was offered, and went to the front kart, number 7. To no surprise, Jacob to the kart next to me, kart number 9.

"So Eddie," Jacob smiled. "You can't really back out now, you'll end up looking like a little bitch."

"Keep talking like that and I'll make you my little bitch," I growled.

"I thought I told you to back off, and let me and Bella be," he narrowed his eyes. "But if you want to play 'who's better' then I'm game, I'm already ahead on that one."

"With a cheap shot," I snorted. "But I guess that is what happens when you're threatened and have nothing to back it up with; you can only take cheap shots."

"I'll do whatever it takes to make sure Bella stays mine," he snarled.

"Careful," I warned while glancing behind me. Bella sat two rows behind us, next to Alice. She smiled up at me. "You wouldn't want Bella to hear you."

"Are you threatening to tell on me?" he lifted a cocky eyebrow.

"No, I'm not going to tell on you," I looked at him directly in the eyes. "I want Bella to fall for me, not out of the pain of discovering how much of a jackass you are, but because she loves me over everyone else."

"Keep wishing," snorted Jacob.

The worker came over and started going over safety procedures. I clasped my helmet on tightly and gripped my wheel ready to get this race started. The smell of exhaust and fumes helped fuel my adrenalin. The roar of my engine was the war cry I wanted to cry out. Jacob was going down.

In seconds that lasted longer then minuets, the green light signaled and I slammed on the pedal. For the first part of the track, Jacob and I were both side by side, only inches apart from one another. I was on the inside as we rounded a turn, helping me get ahead of him by just a foot. But that foot was all I needed to cut him off. I kept tight to the turns, and always made sure to use what little space I gained to cut him off even more so. We had already started our second lap, when I spotted a person ahead of me.

One by one, I passed up strangers, making it more difficult to keep my lead ahead of Jacob. At one point Jacob even bumped into some one else's kart so that they would spin out; almost taking me with them. By our fourth lap, Jacob had managed to cheat his way back up to my side. He already had learned my technique, and was making sure that I would not get to any corners. The only positive part to that however, is that he was spending so much of his energy on trying to make sure I did not get ahead of him, that he didn't any progress as well.

On our fifth and final lap, I knew I had to take the offensive if I wanted to win. As we made our first turn, I let Jacob take it closer. I could tell that he was going to try to beat my with my own trick, however I knew how to counter it.

I stayed closer to his kart, even bumping it at times, forcing him to slow down. While he would slow down, I would speed up. I continue to do that for every turn, until on our last turn I accelerated cutting him off completely.

It was a clear win. No one could dispute that I came up first, Jacob second, Rosalie third, and Alice fourth. Unlike Jacob's hollow victory; I had won with my own skill.

I figured it would have been a bad impression on Bella if I threw down my helmet in front of Jacob as if I just made a touch down, and started doing the running man. But damn, I sure wanted to.

"Wow Edward," Rose came up to me as we all walked off the track and back into the park. "You really know your moves don't you?"

Right as Rose said this, the rest of the group had caught up to us. Jacob had his arm crossed over his chest, and looked like he was having an internal battle on not pouting.

"Oh I really do," I grinned.

Jacob sulked some more.

Emmett threw his arm over Rose and kissed the top of her head. "I want to do something I'm good at!" he demanded. "Like bumper boats. I'm good at bumping, and I'm good at getting people wet..." Emmett bit his tongue as if he was trying to hold back. He let out a mischievous smile and quickly added, "Especially Rose."

We all erupted in laugher as Rose smacked Emmett up side the head. "You are soooo not coming anywhere near this," she waved her hand around herself while she walked off in the direction of the bumper boats.

"I'm sorry Rosie," Emmett cried. "But it had to be said, it was just such a perfect opening!"

Rose ignored him and kept walking to the bumper boats, there wasn't a line so she walked right in and settled herself on a boat in the middle.

Emmett chased right after getting on the boat next to her, continuing his plea. We were all laughing, animosity forgotten, as we each settled ourselves on a boat. The teenage girl who worked there let us go one by one to go off and have our fun. Beside the seven of us, there were another nine people.

I laughed again as I saw Rose pressing her button, making her little propeller work as hard as it can so she could get away, while Emmett was chasing after her saying he was sorry.

Jasper's boat's steering, and propeller button were broken, resulting in him spinning around in circles, not getting anywhere. He was yelling out for Alice, who had parked her boat next to his, and was in hysterics laughing so hard.

Naturally I started to look for Bella, and saw that she seemed to have gotten in an argument with a kid who looked like he was nine. I could somewhat hear her yelling at the kid that she was his elder. All the while the little brat was laughing at her while he continued to use the boat's sprayer to spray her.

While I was watching Bella yell at the kid, I felt a water soak the back of my shit. I let out a curse and wheeled my boat around as fast as it could permit me.

"Having fun watching my girlfriend?" Jacob asked, looking like he was pissed off.

"Yeah, I am actually," I glared at him.

His brows pulled together making him look more like an animal then a human. "Fuck you. Just because you won some gay ass little race, doesn't mean that she is going to go out with you."

"No shit?" I grinned. "I did that to mess with your head, looks like it worked, huh?"

"You wanted to play this game, now I'm going to finish it!"

Jacob sprayed me once again, while I tried to dodge. I pressed down on my sprayer button and heard a sad little sputtering sound and saw a small stream of water shoot out of my boat; then quickly die down. Shit. It was broken.

Jacob's grin became threatening. He continued to spray me as he inched his way closer. When I became too close for the spray to reach me, he used the momentum of his body to rock his boat into mine.

I tried to do the same thing as him, and rock into his boat, but the wave he was creating prevented me from being able to steady myself at all.

I really did not, could not, run away from him. So I sat there and tried to help stabilize my boat as much as possible.

Once Jacob became bored with that, he went back to spraying me. I probably should have just sat there and taken it, and waited until he bored himself, but I continued to taunt him.

"Oh big fucking deal," I spat. "You're getting me wet. Aren't you the big bad wolf?"

When he went back to rocking into my boat, it felt like he was trying to capsize my boat. But I was able to hold my own.

Soon the teenaged girl who worked there blew the horn and had us ride back the dock. Jasper's boat had finally died out, leaving him stranded. Alice had him toss her the arm of his sweatshirt, while he held the other and dragged him back to shore. Emmett and Rose were already on the dock in the middle of a very passionate kiss. Poor Bella looked almost as wet as I was.

"Edward, you're soaked!" Alice gasped, watching me climb out onto the dock.

"Yeah, it's happens," I shrugged.

"I'm almost as bad as you," Bella laughed.

"What happened to that kid?" I asked, leading the group to the arcade.

"The little brat wouldn't leave me alone," she threw her hands up in exasperation. "But at the very end, the kid said that he thought I was pretty and asked if I could be his girlfriend."

We all laughed at Bella's blush. "I told him that if he didn't spray me, then I would have considered it, but he need to learn how to treat girls with more respect."

"Am I going to have to worry about keeping that kid away from you too?" Jacob asked.

"Him too?" laughed Bella. "You make it sound like there are other guys out there pining for me."

Bella had closed her eyes and shook her head, while still laughing. Jacob looked at me while he spoke. "Oh, I'm sure there is some pathetic looser out there who needs to learn to just give up."

I wanted to fight him.

Most likely sensing my hostility, Jasper interrupted. "Hey Edward, you should probably take that wet shirt off and put on my sweat shirt."

"No, give it to Bella," I spoke threw clenched teeth. "She is just as wet."

"It's alright," interrupted Jacob. "She can use my jacket."

I went to the restroom to try and dry off some. I was practically punching the paper towel dispenser, I was so riled up.

"Hey, how you doing?" Emmett's tentative voice asked.

"Just a little pissed off is all," I went to work on scrubbing myself dry.

"Man, that guy is a total fuckhead," Emmett sighed.

"Yeah, he is." I threw the paper towel in the overflowing thrash. With a frustrated breath, I ran my hands threw my hair. "He is playing dirty."

"So what are you going to do about it?" Emmett asked, with a slight smile as if he knew what my response is going to be.

"I'm going to fight harder." With my mind back in place, I looked at Emmett in the eye. "Do you think Bella has noticed anything?"

"No way," he shook his head. "I heard her talking to Rose, and she made some kind of comment about you and Jacob being such guys competing against each other. But she was laughing when she said it, so I highly doubt that she can tell anything is going on."

"Good, the only thing I want Bella to notice is how much of an ass Jacob is."

"Yeah, and how you kicked his ass!" Emmett cheered.

I frowned. "I lost at mini golf, even if he won with a cheap shot, he still won. Yeah, I owned him with the go-karts, but he still whooped me with the bumper boats."

"Oh, that wasn't even any kind of competition though," Emmett reasoned.

"But he still got me soaking wet, and he probably counted that as a win," I shook my head. "No, I need to beat him at whatever we do next."

Emmett sighed, "It looks like we are going to be hitting the arcade next."

We went back outside with the group waiting for us. Jacob had his arms folded and looking at me with a smug ass smile. I was right; he did count the bumper boats as a win.

"Let's go get our coins," Jasper suggested.

While in line for the coin machine, Bella was looking over at the prizes behind the counter next to us. I heard her sigh and shuffle on her feet.

"What's wrong?" I asked quietly. Jacob was ahead of me already getting coins for him and Bella, so he couldn't see me talk to her.

"No, nothing is wrong…" she let her sentence die off. After I gave her a stern look she went back to explaining. "It's just… I have always sucked at arcade games; bad hand-eye coordination goes hand in hand. So I have these traumatic memories of me going to Chucky Cheese when I was younger, and the only prize I would ever get would be the pathetic little Chinese handcuffs, you know the ones that go around your finger."

"Yes," I nodded, trying not to laugh. "Very traumatic indeed."

"Shut up," Bella hissed when she saw my amused grin, although I could tell she was holding in a grin as well. "All I ever wanted was a lava lamp, but only the cool kids, with their cool dexterity won those, while my fingers were stuck in that stupid paper death traps!"

By this time I had completely given up on trying to keep myself together, and was out right laughing, although I still kept it semi quiet; I didn't want Jacob to interrupt us.

"I believe that you are the only person who would call those Chinese handcuffs 'paper death traps' and actually be considered a death trap for you."

Bella blushed and bumped her shoulder into mine. "Yeah well, I'm one of a kind; don't forget that."

"I never could," I whispered.

I was determined to win Bella that purple lava lamp that I saw over the counter. It was 500 tickets. I was going to have to kick some ass. And for me it was not just the matter of showing up Jacob, I wanted to win that lamp for Bella.

The first thing I went for was the shooting range, and big surprise, Jacob was right on my tail. I leveled the plastic gun to my eye, and aimed for the most difficult target; the target which would give me the most amount of tickets.

I shot it on my first try, and continued to shoot it after. I was not going to waste my time with other targets that were worth less, this was not about showing off my skill, as Jacob was doing while he shot down every single target he could, this was about me winning Bella her lava lamp!

After a fair share of wins from the game, I switched to the game where you roll the little wooden ball into the holes. It was tricky, but if I just kept to not trying to show off, then I would be alright. Jacob, on the other hand, was flicking his wrist, and trying to get the ball to jump in weird ways. While I was hitting the 100-point hole with my boring old method, Jacob kept getting the 50's with his cool tricks.

He really must have been oblivious as to what I was trying to do. While he just shoved whatever tickets he won in his pocket, I folded mine up neatly and gently tucked them into my back pocket.

So as time went on, I just stuck to the games where I knew I could win, Jacob at my tail. Emmett and Jasper were too busy with the Star Wars games to try to win any tickets, while the girls were trying out the new roller coaster simulator.

After some time went by, I had used all my coins, and then some. The girls had found Jasper and Emmett, and then tried to round up Jacob and me.

"Hey, I got a whole bunch of tickets," Jacob smiled as he walked up to Bella. "Let's go get you something."

While we all went to the prize counter, I began to panic. There was no way Jacob had 500 tickets. I wasn't sure exactly how many I had, but Jacob wasn't far behind…

Jacobs grabbed the tangle of paper from his pockets, and ruffled them onto the counter. The worker started to slide them into a machine that counted the tickets for them.

458

Yes.

"So what do you want?" Jacob asked as he glimpsed up at me. Before she could argue back he went on, "Just pick something, otherwise that would be a total waste of money, it's alright."

"Err…" Bella looked longingly at the lava lamp, then with a fake smile pointed to a water gun.

"Great choice!" Jacob cheered as he hugged Bella. "I'll be right back, I need to use the restroom." He looked up at me, and I met his grin with my own.

I handed my tickets quietly while listening to Bella behind me.

"Here Em," Bella whispered. "You would probably like this water gun more then I would."

"Thanks Bella!"

The employee came back with my total. 510.

I pointed to the lava lamp, along with another prize.

"Hey, I'm hungry let's go eat!" Alice suggested, with a round of agreement. Jasper said he needed to use the restroom as well, and that he would let Jacob know where we were going.

As we all started to walk off, I grabbed Bella's arm and held her back. "Here, I won something for you." I held out her prize in my hand.

"Edward, you are such a jerk!" she laughed as she grabbed the paper Chinese handcuffs.

"Yeah, I thought you wouldn't like it as much as this," I held out the lava lamp in my other hand.

Her mouth dropped a little, and her eyes shone. "Edward, you really shouldn't…"

"But I wanted too," I smiled. "It is something you really wanted so I gave it to you." I paused as I sucked in a breath while watching her large brown eyes study the box that held the lamp. "I would give you anything you wanted."

She lifted her eyes to mine, and I was blown away by the intensity in them. She was so utterly beautiful.

We ended up deciding to eat at a pizza parlor that was in the same shopping center as the Family Fun Center. By the time the waiter had cleared an area big enough for all seven of us, Jasper and Jacob had come back. On the way to the parlor, Bella had dropped off the lava lamp at my car so that it would not be at risk of her tripping on it. Her words, not mine.

I sat directly across from Jacob, Bella at his side. With Alice on my left, and Emmett on my right, that left Rose and Jasper sitting at the heads of the table.

Jacob had his arm on the back of Bella's chair, and was grinning away. Damn, does that guy ever just not smile?

We were all trying to figure out what kinds of pizza we were going to order when I heard Jacob.

"You like pineapple, don't ya?" he asked.

"Actually, she hates pineapple," I corrected.

"I think Bella is perfectly capable of answering on her own thanks," Jacob's lip had thinned.

"She hates everything about pineapples," I continued. "The smell, the texture; if you have pineapple pizza in front of her for too long she will get sick."

Bella let out a little laugh; "I did get sick just by looking at didn't I?"

"Her favorite kind of cheese is Munster," Jacob growled.

"Actually, it's provolone," I smirked.

"It's ok," Bella soothed. "It doesn't matter what kind of pizza we get-"

Jacob cut her off. "She is ticklish right under her ear."

Bella's mouth, along with everyone else at our table's, mouth fell open. "Jacob," she warned.

"She is allergic to mango," I replied quickly, trying to swallow down the blind range.

The waiter came by, but I couldn't hear what Jacob had ordered. I was too distracted imagining beating Jacob's face in.

"Her favorite shirt is the light blue one, that says 'this girl is a genius,'" Jacob countered.

"Bella still has her first pair of Converse sneakers that she got in the 8th grade, but are hidden away so Alice can't find them."

"Hey!" yelled Alice. "You told me you trashed those!"

"I…I…" Bella stumbled over her words as she looked between Jacob and I. "I can't get rid of them."

I could see the wheels in Jacob's head turning. He had nothing. I had won. With the arcade, and with this. I had won, and he was nothing more than-

He leaned down and kissed her. I knew that most likely they had kissed each other before, but I had never seen them. And I knew that time would come, but I thought that I could have a little more time to prepare myself.

But as I watched him tilt her head up to meet his better, I realized that it didn't matter how long I tried to prepare myself, I would never be ready for this. And it didn't matter how fast I drove, or how many prizes I won her, or even how well I knew her; what really mattered in this sick competition was the fact that Jacob could kiss her, and I can't.

Fuck, I hate life sometimes.

But if Jacob thinks that that is going to slow me down, he is wrong. He just lit a fire under my ass.

I love Bella, damn it. And I swear that I will kiss her freely like Jacob is now.

* * *

**SO, I like to think that guys are not necessarily the smartest tool in the shed when it comes to winning a girl. That is why I had Edward go to his guys to help him out, and how would a guy try to win a girl? By being all macho and knocking down the other guy's masculinity.**

**Don't worry, he will get some good advice in the near future which will (trust me) make us all happy. Give you something to think about. Haha**

**I have a thought. So I would really like to post some kind of blog, and give you guys updates, answer questions that you might have. But the only place where I know how to post a blog is MySpace. So I think I might start doing that, but let me know what you guy think, and if it is a waist then I will not do it. But just give some feed back :) And if you guys have a MySpace, you can tottaly ask to be my friend and make me happy. It is located in the same spot where you normally would ask, but it is invisable, b/c i'm cool like that. haha**

**Next chapter will be in Bella's POV, and it will be a Thanksgiving special! Haha. but it has to be done. All chapters have a purpose.**

**Anyway it will be called:_ I am Thankful for You_**

**I hope you enjoyed, and let me know about the blog thing! Thanks :)**


	18. I’m Thankful for You

**Hello and good afternoon. So, first thing is first. HOLY CRAP TWILIGHT COMES OUT ON FRIDAY!!!!**

**So yeah, I'm excited :P**

**You all are awesome, and are rocking my world like no other. Just like my Betas YOU KNOW who they are!!!**

**Second. I got a live journal to answer some of the questions I got and some thoughts, go to my profile for the link.**

**I do not own Twilight, or the other people that I may use in this**

* * *

I'm Thankful for You

Bella's POV

I opened my eyes and smiled. I shouldn't smile, and I shouldn't get this warm fuzzy feeling in my heart, and I shouldn't get that feeling in my stomach reminding me how excited I get just by looking at that purple lava lamp. But I do feel like my heart is flying, and I feel like I'm about to burst out in ridiculous girlish giggles.

Damn it.

It is just a present, barely even that! Edward had enough tickets to get this, and he was being nice, nothing more. Hell I got him a piano, and I didn't have feelings for him, at least not then.

Wait. Rephrase that.

I didn't have feelings for him, and I still don't. So there is really nothing to get worked up about. I mean sure the moment I came home from the Family Fun Center, I plugged in the lava lamp in on my nightstand right next to my bed. But that is only because I was excited about finally having a lava lamp, and not about who gave me the lava lamp.

Why do girls get worked up over the lamest of things?

I rolled over onto my back and just stared at the ceiling. I should probably put something up there, seeing as this is how I have been waking up for the past couple of days.

The first day I had gone into complete denial. The second day I flirted with the idea that I might, maybe, possibly have a crush on Edward, and now I am admitting that yes, I do have a crush on Edward.

Shit.

I was hopping this would go away by dating Jacob, but it was not working out as I had planned. I mean Jake is nice enough. I don't know - there is just something about him, like he is hiding a part of himself from me… God, we have been dating for only a couple of weeks, and here I am accusing him of hiding a part of himself from me, while I'm crushing on my best friend/roommate.

Obviously we are not going to show ourselves completely to each other right off the bat. You have to ease yourself onto the other person. But still, there is just a feeling that I have that he is… I don't know.

He is really sweet to me, but sometimes I feel like he might not be as charming as I think he is. Just look at the pizza parlor. All Edward did was tell Jacob that I don't like pineapple, although why Edward just spoke up like that is a whole separate theory. And it was funny to see them go back and forth like that, but it got too serious for me. Jacob mentioning that I'm ticklish right below my ear was uncalled for. That is a private matter.

But the look on Edward's face… he looked disgusted. And as much as I wanted to pretend that it didn't have an effect on me; my heart fell a little as I realized that the idea of a sensitive spot like that made Edward react so strongly in a negative way. So after that I pretty much tuned out the boys, and tried to ignore that disappointed feeling that threatened to make my eyes water.

Then out of the blue Jacob leaned down and kissed me.

I really needed that kind of distraction, and Jacob's kissing skills proved to be a very good distraction. However I was not distracted enough, and I heard Edward excuse himself from the table. Of course, if the prospect of my sensitive skin was enough to make him look disgusted, then seeing me kiss was probably making him physically ill.

I don't have any brothers or sisters, so I wouldn't know what a brotherly type's reaction would be. So that is the only way I can explain Edward's reactions. He thought of me as nothing more then a sister.

Obviously a part of me was wishing that maybe it was something more. That maybe, he could kind of feel the same confused feelings that I have for him. But then the reasonable side of me kicked in.

First off; I highly doubt I am his type. Case in point: Lauren, that tall blond, cheerleader type, and about as smart as Shamu. Wait no that was not very nice of me. Shamu can at least do tricks.

I have never seen Edward check out another girl, which means he is probably still hung up on her; which means that there is no way that he is interested in me.

So my theories as to why Edward behaved that way he did:

There is the whole, he thinks of me like a sister. But then that theory goes out the door, because Emmett and Jasper have always said that I was their little sister, and you don't see them acting up. So what Edward is feeling and going through is more then just brotherly feelings.

So this is where the hope started to spring up – messing with my vulnerable heart. But the more I thought about it, the more my theory started to make sense.

I took Edward in, when really I could have easily thrown him out once I realized who he was, and he definitely recognizes that. And we have spent a lot of time together since then, so that maybe now he is not used to spending less time with me. Maybe I have become a crutch to him, and he has learned to lean on me, and thinks that I will not be there for him any more?

I let out a heavy sigh while I threw my arms over my head.

Ok, I just need to look on the positive side of things. It is only a little crush; at least I'm not in love with the guy!

Second, it doesn't seem like he can tell.

Thirdly, I have Jacob. And as horrible it is for me to be using him like this, I need someone to help me get over this attraction.

I cannot like Edward. That would lead to so many bad, very bad consequences. It would make being friends really awkward, and then there is the whole _living_ together thing. He would feel so uncomfortable, that he would probably want to move out. God, what kind of person am I, where I allow myself to get a crush on the man who not only needed my help, but trusted me enough to open himself up to me. He does not need my pathetic feelings getting in the way.

So then it is really not healthy to be swooning at that lava lamp. Come on, it is a damn lava lamp. It is not like he got me roses.

I just need to shake it off. Take a deep breath and…. I need to walk.

I jumped from my bed and began to pace in my room, and reasoned with my self.

I have a perfectly good-looking boyfriend, who adores me, and that is what I need to focus on - that and taking deep breaths. But there are girls who would kill to have a chance to go on a date with Jake. I know this because I Googled him after our first date and was very surprised to see how many fan clubs he had.

But Jacob is just so much more then just looks. He is really funny, and a total sweetheart. And when he talks about his dad, and friends from back home he gets this warm smile on his face, which tells me that he is not some shallow pretty-boy. He has true feelings, and he is a real guy.

I briskly walked into my closet and started to sort through my clothes; not really looking at what I was shuffling through. Hell I didn't even know what I picked out until I adjusted the purple off the shoulder sweater top, and a casual pair of black jeans.

It was already 9 when I finished with the basics of brushing my hair and teeth. Jacob was coming over to pick me up for a late breakfast. I could hear music softly playing from Edward's room. I decided to let him know I was leaving when I'm on my way out.

There was a rapid knock on the door, and I was pleased to feel a shiver of excitement.

"Bella!" Jacob greeted me with a large smile and swooped down for a kiss. This kiss was no greeting. It had a little too much excitement behind it.

Once he let up, I pulled my dizzy head away and started to giggle. "Well hello Jacob. Let me go grab my purse and we can head out."

Jacob followed me to the living room where I started my search for my purse. I could have sworn that I tossed it around here somewhere last night…

"I can't believe Thanksgiving is only two days away," Jacob thought aloud.

I was on my knees looking underneath the couch, and didn't look up as I spoke. "Yeah, I really need to do the grocery shopping tomorrow, which is going to be a major pain in the ass because I waited so long."

"You are going to have to do whole lot of shopping with so many people on your guest list," Jacob let out a small laugh. "And I bet Emmett can sure put it away."

"Oh God," I laughed right back. "I don't know why I volunteered to have Thanksgiving at my place this year, and to cook all the food." I shook my head. "I just don't trust Alice or Rose behind the kitchen. Now Mrs. Cullen, she can whip you some mighty fine desert so I am relieved she and Mr. Cullen are coming over too."

"That sounds really good," he nodded.

"It is," I leaned back from the couch and rested on my heals. "It'll be nice to have everyone that I love there. I'm bummed that my mom couldn't make it, but at least my dad is going to be there."

"Yeah, I can't wait to meet him," Jacob sighed with contentment.

"What?" my head whipped around to see him stretched out on the other end of the couch.

Jacob shrugged. "I'm excited to meet your dad. My dad is kind of upset that I'm going to miss turkey day with him, but I told him that I was flying in the day after, and I would eat all of his leftovers so it would almost be like I was there. But hey, I get to spend Thanksgiving with you, so it'll be worth it."

SHIT!

"Jacob…" crap how do I word this? "I… why… I didn't…." I let out a frustrated sigh.

"What's wrong?" Jacob frowned.

"It's just… I didn't plan on you being there…" I took a breath, hoping that he would figure this out on his own.

"Ok, so then just throw in an extra chair," Jacob continued to frown.

"Jacob… I wasn't _planning_ on you being there," please God; let him realize what I'm trying to say here.

"Oh…" his frown disappeared and an unsettling calm settled on his face. "So I'm not invited and I'm not going to meet your father."

It wasn't a question.

"I'm just not ready for you to meet my family yet," I tried to smile, but that oddly calm look on his face was throwing me off.

He nodded tightly, "So you are not ready for me to meet you dad, but Edward can go head and stay here? Because he is one of the people who you love and want to be around?"

I replied with my own frown. "Edward has already met my father back in September, so yes it is ok for him to be around and it's different with him. Second, we have only been dating for a few weeks, and it is perfectly reasonable that I don't want to introduce you to my family."

"I'm sorry," Jacob said sarcastically. "But if I was in your position, I would be dying to show off my amazing girlfriend to my dad. I guess you would just rather show off Edward."

"What does Edward have to do with any of this?" I sighed in exasperation.

"Nothing, except that you would rather show Edward off to your dad than me!" Jacob raised his voice.

"Because he already met him before!" I answered back, just as loudly. "What? Are you jealous of him or something?"

Jacob didn't answer; instead he glared at the floor.

"He is my friend!" I yelled. "Yes he is going to be in my life, because he is my best friend and my roommate. He is going to know things about me that you won't, and we are going to have inside jokes that you won't get, and he is going to be more involved in my life then you are sometimes, because he is here, and he is not going anywhere!"

"So you are choosing him over me then?" Jacob asked gruffly.

"Oh. My. God. I am not saying that!" I let out a small annoyed yell. "I'm telling you that you need to get over… whatever this is you are going through. I don't want to stop dating you. I do like you, but I am not in that place with you where I can share certain things with you, like my family."

"Well then, don't let me stop you from sharing this with Edward." Jacob stood up, and walked straight to the front door, without even looking at me.

"Jake…" I stood up as well. "Jake, wait up!"

I followed him to the front door, where he was putting on his raincoat. "I'm leaving to visit my family early, tonight if I can."

"Jake…"

"My dad will be thrilled to see me at least."

"That is not fair."

He looked at me, and his eyes seemed much darker. "Have a happy Thanksgiving; I'll be back on the second. I'll call you then."

Then he walked out straight to the elevator without even looking back. I wanted to call out, to say something, but I had nothing to say.

I slammed the front door, and did a cross between a yell and a growl. He was being so unreasonable with this, and then to mention Edward… oh no. Maybe he could tell that I have a slight crush on Edward? Not possible, I just made this discovery, I highly doubt anyone else has too.

I didn't even think that Jacob would want to consider spending the holiday with me. It is a day for family, and this is my family.

Charlie knows that I'm going out with Jacob; hell he was even kind of excited about me going out with a NBA player. But I never introduced Charlie to any of my boyfriends. When he meets someone that I'm with, I want to be able to say, "Dad, this is my boyfriend So-and-So, and he means everything to me."

Who knew I had that kind of sentimental side to me. But introducing someone to the family, I want it to mean something, and not just what I do with every guy I date. Oh, and spending a holiday with a boyfriend, now that is a big step. Except for New Years, and Easter, and Halloween, and 4th of July, and President's day. Ok, so really the only holidays that were meant to be just with family are Thanksgiving, and Christmas. But everyone knows that Thanksgiving is family day, at least it is for me.

Crap, what if Jacob's Thanksgivings were not like mine. Well obviously they were not going to be like mine, but what if his holidays are more casual then mine. Well then that just makes me feel like shit.

But he really didn't need to bring Edward into this. I might have a small crush on him, but Edward is still my friend, part of my little urban family, so of course he was going to be apart of this.

I stomped my way to the living room and threw myself onto the couch, lying on my stomach. I grabbed a pillow, smothered my face, and groaned. Ugh… I so did not want to have to deal with this right now.

"That didn't sound fun," Edward's quiet, velvet voice came up beside me.

I rolled to my face to the side, and looked at him. "Oh, please don't tell me that you heard all that."

Edward just continued to look at me with his piercing green eyes. He didn't say anything.

"Edward?"

"Sorry, you just told me not to tell you if I heard," he shrugged. "I thought it would be safer not to say anything."

"You heard," I groaned, shoving my face back into the pillow.

I felt his hand lightly stroke my head. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Why are you sorry?" I asked, my voice muffled by the pillow.

"I'm sorry that you guys argued," he spoke as he continued to stroke my hair. "I'm sorry that you are upset. I'm sorry that he left you so quickly like that, without resolving anything, and while you were still upset. And I'm sorry that my presence here helped fuel the argument, which in turn hurt you."

"Edward no!" I lifted my head completely off the pillow. "If you heard any of that, then I hope you heard the part where I told Jacob that you are in my life. You are in it for as long as you want to be."

I felt a crushing pain as I said the last part. The idea of Edward not being in my life… It hurt just thinking about it.

Edward smiled at me - not his normal smile, or his crooked grin that I love so much. This was a smile full of warmth, but with a shiver of sadness.

"I'll be here for as long as you want me."

I rested my head back down on the pillow, while my stomach let out a very audible growl.

"Stay here," Edward gave my head one last stroke. "I'll go make you some breakfast."

"You don't have to," I pushed myself up, trying to get up.

Edward pressed down on my back, forcing me to rest back down on the couch. "You are going to spend the next couple of days getting ready to cook the biggest meal in your life, let me scramble you some eggs."

I spent that day being completely lazy. It wasn't like Jacob and I had broken up, we were just having a fight, right? And even if we did break up, I don't think I would be this bummed out.

What was really bothering me was the way Jake and I left things. I hate leaving issues unresolved. And this was one big mess of unresolved.

But I really could not afford to be distracted; I had a huge meal to get ready for. Sure there were only going to be nine people there: Me, Edward, Alice, Jasper, Rose, Emmett, Esme, Carlisle, and Charlie, but all the guys can really pack it away. Well all the girls too for that matter. So really it was like I am going to be cooking for 18, instead of 9.

The next morning I was acting like a Turkey must act like the day before Thanksgiving. I was running around all over the place, not getting anything done.

I had gone over the grocery list, the damn groceries that I waited to buy a day before Thanksgiving, and I still felt like I was missing a few things.

"I'll call you if I think of something," Edward smiled as he repeated this for the millionth time. He was sitting by his piano, fingers unconsciously tracing the keys. I thought back to the beautiful melody that I heard a few weeks back. I hadn't heard it since then, and I was too afraid to ask. If he wanted me to know about it, he would have told me.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" he asked again. "People can get really crazy out there when they are on a time limit."

I shrugged into my black, Burberry coat. "No, it'll be faster this way. I'm really particular when it comes to what type of food I get."

"All right, but if you feel like you need me…" he trailed off his words, but continued to look at me with a serious expression.

"I got it!" I sighed with a smile. "I'll call, now I have to go. There is a turkey out there with my name on it, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to fight a soccer mom for it."

The trip to the store was very interesting. I kicked myself in the ass one more time for putting this off for as long as I did. But I armed myself with a grocery cart and my shopping list, and then went to work.

The basics: corn, green beans, potatoes (the real kind, because I like to make them by hand), gravy mix, pumpkin pie, I was going to making three different types of salads this year, bread rolls (enough to feed a small army), yams (although each year hardly anyone touches them, but Jasper demands that we have them), the supplies for stuffing, ice cream, whip cream, chips, hot sauce, avocados (I have to put something out while I cook, other wise Emmett would not stop whining), and the Turkey.

Just as I had suspected, the store had hordes of soccer moms, a few very feisty elderly woman, and a gay guy who was bitching out one of the soccer moms. Going head on, I went straight to the places where they would have what I need; no messing around with thing I might want.

I was able to fight my way for everything I needed, saving the turkey for last. I was going to get a 20 pounder, probably even bigger. As I neared the freezer where they held the turkeys, I saw a soccer mom eyeing me, threatening me with her eyes. Ignoring her, I went over and started to look for one that seemed to be large enough, all the while she was hovering over me.

A few times I faked to grab a turkey, just to see what she would do. Each time she would jump, and start to glare at me.

Well maybe she should just pick her own damn turkey, instead of looking at what I'm going for. Getting frustrated by guarding my cart, and trying to ignore the soccer mom, I started to wish I had brought Edward with me; we could have double teamed her.

My fingers started to get numb as I pushed frozen turkey after frozen turkey. Finally I found a 23 pounder that looked like a size of a small child. I turned around, cradling the turkey in my arms, and said a triumphant "ha!" to the soccer mom, who looked like she had moved on to stalking an elderly woman.

As I left, it seemed like there were even more people there then when I had first arrived.

When I was only a few blocks away from the apartment, I called Edward so he could come to the parking garage and help me bring in some of the bags. But he didn't answer. And what if I was at the grocery store calling for backup? Hmm, so much of a help he was.

I figured I was going to make a few trips, so I just took two bags with me, all the while thinking about how much crap I was going to give Edward.

When I reached the door, I could hear shouts, and a football game blaring out in absolute clarity. I unlocked the door, and dropped the bags in the entranceway. I could hear Edward yelling out at the referee, along with…

"Dad?" I gasped.

Edward and Charlie were both on the edge of their seats on the couch, staring at the TV with a big grin on both their faces, while Charlie patted Edward on the back and started to laugh.

"Dad?" I said again, a little bit louder.

"Bella!" Charlie got up and walked over to me, pulling me into a tight one-armed hug.

Edward turned down the volume so we could hear.

"Dad what are you doing here?" I smiled. "You said you were not coming in until tomorrow."

"I figured I might as well stop by a day early, I hardly ever see you Bells," he shrugged.

"Or maybe you want two nights of someone else cooking for you?" I asked with a grin.

Charlie smiled sheepishly at me and walked back over to the couch, mumbling "Edward didn't question why I was here a day early."

I rolled my eyes. "Don't get too comfortable; I need the both of you to help me bring up the rest of the food."

After we got all of the bags into the kitchen, (it only took two more trips) Charlie sat on one of the bar stools, while Edward helped me put everything away.

"So where is that boy you are dating?" Charlie asked - a sudden frown on his face.

I shook my head. Of course, I'm 28, and yet any guy that I date is going to be referred to as "boy".

"He left to go see his family," I answered. I really did not want to talk about Jacob too much with Charlie.

"That's a shame," Charlie sighed. "I would have liked to meet him. Although I really shouldn't be surprised, I haven't met any of Bella's boyfriends!"

"Really?" Edward asked, as he helped me gut the turkey.

"Nope, I've never met a single damn one," Charlie laughed. "She has been hiding me from them."

"Maybe I've have been hiding them from you?" I offered, sarcasm playing at my tone.

"Is it so bad that a father wants to meet his daughter's boyfriend?" Charlie asked.

"No Sir," Edward spoke up. "It is part of a father's roll to interrogate whatever man comes sniffing around."

"Wow, thanks traitor," I shook my head. "So you must not be getting a proper meal since you had to drive over here a day early."

"You're changing the subject," Charlie noted.

"And you are evading my question Chief Swan."

"I have been eating alright," he offered as a slight blush creped onto his face.

"When you say 'eating alright' do you mean some kind of rotation of pizza and eggs for dinner?" I asked. "Or is does 'eating alright' imply that someone has been cooking for you?"

His blush deepened, reminding me whom I inherited that trait from. "I have been over to Sue Clearwater's house a few times."

I bit my bottom lip to stop myself grinning like an idiot. "I always thought that she liked you…"

"Now Bella," Charlie stood up straighter. "You know her husband died."

"Yeah, like 15 years ago. It is perfectly fine for her to like you." I paused, with a smile. "And for you to like her."

Charlie blushed a deep crimson, and ducked his head.

"I remember Sue Clearwater," Edward interrupted. "She was always a really kind woman, helped around a lot with events around the town. Do you know if the town is doing anything special for Thanksgiving, Charlie?"

Charlie looked at Edward with a relieved expression, then went into a little too much detail about the play the elementary school was doing. I whipped up a quick dinner of chicken, steamed vegetables, and rice; all the while Edward and Charlie sat around. Whenever I needed help though, Edward would come right over without me even having to ask.

Conversation continued through dinner, and even a while after. Charlie had never been a man of many words, and he still wasn't. Edward and I did most of the heavy lifting when it came to the conversation, but Charlie would place his input frequently enough; which was a big thing for Charlie.

Around 10, we were all spent, and I had to get up early so I could start cooking.

"So Dad, you can sleep in my bed, and I'll just take the couch," I offered.

"Bella, you don't have to give up your bed, that couch is plenty comfortable for me," Charlie stated.

"Dad, that couch maybe unusually comfortable, but your back isn't what is used to be…"

Charlie cut me off, "I am perfectly capable of sleeping on a couch."

"What did you use to do when you stayed here, while Alice lived here?" Edward asked.

"Alice and Bella would sleep together, while I got the extra bed," Charlie nodded before he broke out into laughter. "But you two can't go and do that… sharing a bed… ha!"

I avoided Edward's eyes while I focused on trying to not blush. "Yeah, that would not be right." Don't think about how warm it was sleeping with Edward. Don't think about how comfortable it was. Don't think about those green eyes.

"I can take the couch," Edward suggested.

"No, I don't need you giving up your bed," Charlie frowned.

"No, I wasn't saying that," Edward countered. "I was just going to stay up a little longer, I have some work I still need to do, and I really don't want to keep you up."

When Charlie didn't say anything, Edward went on. "Actually you would be doing me the favor. I'm still working on a new piece, and I prefer to keep it to myself until it's complete."

"Well… if I was helping you…" Charlie thought.

"You would be," Edward smiled.

"Alright then, we better get to bed so then you can get to work," Charlie nodded.

I said my goodnights to both of them, but looked over to Edward right before I went to my room, and mouthed "thank you."

Edward smiled, nodded and mouthed back, "your welcome."

Getting up at five in the morning so I could put the small child, a.k.a. turkey, in the oven was not fun. But I was doing this for everyone else so… oh God, I don't want to leave my bed.

After throwing on a pair of blue sweats, and a gray T-shirt, I went out to the living room. I really couldn't help but smile when I saw Edward lying on the couch; one arm across his muscular chest, the other over his face. As I walked to the kitchen I thought about how nice it was to see how well Charlie and Edward got along. It was a pleasant shock, but startling none the less. They hadn't spent that much time together at my birthday party, but they seemed to hit it off last night. And for Edward to give up his bed for him…

"Morning," Edward's groggy voice made me jump, and loose my balance. Edward grabbed my shoulders and steadied me, all the while chuckling to himself.

"Not funny," I hissed.

"Hey you shouldn't be mean to me," Edward stuck out his bottom lip, in a fake pout. He looked like an idiot, but somehow very sexy. "You woke me up at this ungodly hour."

"Crap, I am sorry," I gave him an apologetic grin. "What time did you go to bed?"

"One-ish," he yawned. "But at least I got a lot of work done."

"Sorry. You should go crash on my bed," I smiled. "I have a ton of work to do, so I would just keep you up."

"No, no," Edward shuffled further into the kitchen. "I can help… I can," he yawned. "Just tell me what you need me to do and…" He yawned again. "I can help." He yawned again.

"Listen up, Mr. Yawny McYawnerson," I dismissed the look Edward gave me with the new nickname. "As tempting it is to have a guy, who can only cook spaghetti, help me out; I think I'm going to have to pass. You would only slow me down kid."

"Would not," he mumbled.

"How about this; go get some beauty sleep, then you can come out and help me with the guacamole, ok?"

"Mmm-K," he muttered.

I bit my lip so I wouldn't laugh as I watched him walk back to my room; he looked like night of the living dead.

Once I got going, I could not stop, or slow down. I chopped, I sliced, I stirred, I seasoned - I was on a roll. Charlie came out around 8, looking like he had just had the best sleep he had ever gotten. I kept offering him to get him a new bed, the one he has now is older then me, but he just blew me off each time. I think this year I'll get him a new bed for Christmas.

He plopped himself down on the couch and started watching highlights of football games. It always made me happy seeing him relax here. He deserved every bit of peace that was offered to him, and then some. I never told him as much as I would like to, but I really do love him, he is a good dad, even if it is embarrassing as all hell riding in the cruiser with him.

At 9 Edward came out fully dressed in a forest green button down shirt, and a nice fitted pair of blue jeans. He came over to see if he could help out, but by that time I already had most of everything going, so I just asked him to watch everything while I went to go get ready.

I decided to wear a semi nice, knee length navy blue dress. It was pretty, but no one could see it while I strapped on an apron.

By 11 everyone had arrived. Mrs. Cullen was in the kitchen with me, I was working on rolls; she was making her infamous strawberry shortcake.

Alice and Rose wanted to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, but the guys were complaining, saying that a football game was going to start soon. After two "But Jazzy!" three "Emmett Cullen, don't you even try to sweet talk me" and one and final, "Carlisle dear, please don't be difficult." The girls won.

At 4:30, dinner was finally ready.

The apartment smelt like Thanksgiving, and I was sure that it was going to stay like that for the week following. The formal dinning room table was extendable, so we were able to seat everyone comfortably. I sat at the head of the table which was closer to the kitchen so I could go back and forth. Edward sat on my right, next to Rose, who was next to Carlisle. Charlie sat on the other end, with Esme on his right (sitting right across from Carlisle) Emmett to her right, with Jasper in between Emmett and Alice, who was on my left.

Charlie had helped me slice the turkey, which was sitting at the center of the table surrounded by dishes and dishes of food. The only thing missing was the third batch of rolls, but they would be ready in a bit.

"How about we all go around the table and say what we are thankful for?" Alice offered. Before we could understand what she was offering, she continued. "Ok! I'll go first." She cleared her throat. "I am thankful for finding a wedding planner that I actually like, and who has as good as style as me!"

We all laughed as she nodded her head proudly. "Your turn Jazz," she smiled.

"I am thankful for Alice saying yes to my proposal," Jasper leaned down, and kissed Alice on the forehead while everyone awed.

"My turn!" Emmett cheered. "I am thankful for finally beating Rose at Halo."

"I let you win," Rose interrupted.

"But I'm still thankful baby!"

"I'm thankful that my son found someone who is willing to put with him," Esme sighed.

"You say that every year," Emmett frowned.

"Yes, because one day I fear that Rose is going to wake up and not want to take care of you anymore," Esme shook her head with a grin on her face.

"Impossible Esme," Rose smiled. "I love Emmett to much!"

We laughed again, then looked at Charlie.

"Oh, my turn…err…" Charlie looked up at the ceiling as if the answer was written up there. "I guess I'm thankful for that 8 pounder I caught a few months back."

Next was Carlisle, "I'm thankful to be getting the music area up and running with the company." He smiled over at Edward.

"I'm thankful for that T-bird I found and was able to buy so I can restore it," Rose nodded, with a serious expression on her face.

"Oh, you found it?" Emmett asked with excitement.

"Yep, I forgot to tell you, but I found it last night!"

"That's so cooooool," Emmett agreed.

"Again," Esme smiled warily, "I am so very thankful…"

"Your turn Edward," Alice sang.

Edward took a moment before he said anything. "I am thankful for a lot this year. I am thankful for second chances," he looked at me. "For new opportunities," he looked at Emmett and Carlisle. "And for realizing what true friends are," he paused for a second to look at everyone. "And for realizing what true love is." He said to himself.

Everyone nodded in agreement, and offered words of praise. I looked at Edward, and felt that familiar pain in my heart, and in my gut. He was so happy now, that I forgot what he had lost; his life, his friends, and the woman who he thought was his true love.

"Your turn Bella!" Rose interrupted my thoughts.

Crap. What am I thankful for… umm….

"I err… I am thankful for…"

DING!

"That's the rolls, I go grab that!" I quickly ran over to the oven, and slipped the rolls from the pan, to the basket. By the time I got back to the table, everyone was in discussion about one thing or another.

The moment I set the rolls on the table, everyone began to dig in. I must admit, I am one damn good cook. If the whole writing thing didn't work out, then I would definitely have been a cook. Everyone seemed to have the same thoughts as me, especially Emmett who asked that if I mysteriously got fired, if would I take up the culinary arts.

We ate, and ate, then ate some more. And somehow we still had room for desert. I was pleased that I bought as much food as I did.

Once diner and desert were done, we all sat on our seats, and complained about how much food we just ate. Aww, the traditions of Thanksgiving…

Somehow everyone managed to make their way over to the TV. Esme, Emmett and I were starting to do dishes, and put away some of the left over food. I could hear Jasper, Edward, Carlisle, and Charlie moping about missing the game, while Alice and Rose started to flip threw channels.

I was scooping some of the corn into a plastic Glad wear container, when Alice and Rose started to scream out my name.

"Oh my God," Alice yelled.

"Bella get out here!" Rose screamed.

Emmett, Esme, and I all ran out to the living room where everyone was watching the TV.

I looked closely and saw that it was one of those entertainment shows; I think this one was called Chelsea Lately.

"So Jacob Black, we all know who he is," Chelsea Handler, the host, spoke. "That hunky, hunky, hunk of a NBA player who plays for the Wolves."

Her three guest panels all nodded, one of them was that Perez Hilton gossip guy. Chelsea went on. "Well he was one of those idiots who decided to go flying the day before Thanksgiving. I mean, come on. You know it is going to busy, so why go on that day?"

"Well have you seen his reported new girlfriend?" Perez asked.

"Oh yeah, that writer chick," Chelsea nodded. "What is her name? Isabella Swan right?"

"She's that writer, right?" asked on of the other male panelists.

"Yeah, she writes short stories," answered the female panelist. "But her work is supposed to actually be good too."

"And she is beautiful," Perez nodded. "If I were straight, I wouldn't want to leave her behind."

I felt myself blush like crazy when they showed a picture of me all dressed up when I went to some kind of function the beginning of this year.

"Yeah, she seems like a nice tight little piece of ass," Chelsea agreed with a straight face.

"I don't know," the female panelist sighed. "There is just something about her that makes her seem like a bitch to me."

"Yeah, like she acts nice in front of the camera, but I bet she is a total diva behind the scenes," the male panelist offered.

"She lives in Seattle right?" Chelsea asked. "Like she is too good to live here in LA."

"Oh no, she is an intellectual," the woman panelist laughed. "She is too smart to live down here."

"God, I hate those types of people," Chelsea sighed. "They always think they are so much better then everyone. Let's just hope that Jacob gets out before Ms. Smarty gets too involved with him. What do you think Chuy?"

The camera panned over to a little Mexican man, who was sitting on a director's chair.

"I think," he spoke with a Spanish accent. "That I would still tap that."

The audience broke out into laughter. "Sorry Chuy," Chelsea laughed. "But the only way Isabella Swan would let you get any where near her Pikachu, is if you read one of her books. Have you read any of them?"

"No, but they were great for the fire in my fireplace at home!" They laughed again.

I bit my lip, and I started to blink quickly.

"Bella," Rose gasped as she turned off the TV. "We heard Jacob was being mentioned… I didn't think they would talk about you."

"Don't listen to them Bella, they are complete idiots, who don't have a life, and can only waste their time being mean," Alice soothed.

"Is that even legal?" Charlie asked, whose face was bright red with anger. "Can we do something about that?"

"They are just jealous of you dear," Esme placed her hand on my shoulder.

"I need to go finish the dishes," I whispered before I whipped around and walked across the apartment to the kitchen.

I was happy that no one followed me, but I felt bad for the poor plates that I was taking it out on. I could hear ESPN blaring from the living room, and was relieved they were giving me my privacy.

"Bella," Edward spoke softly from behind me.

I turned around and saw the concerned look on his face. Not being able to help myself, I crashed into his chest and let the tears fall silently down my face.

"They don't even know me," I gasped.

"No, they don't," Edward began to rub my back, and stroke my hair.

"They know nothing about me, how can they just judge me like that?"

Edward waited until I had calmed down before he spoke. "They shouldn't have said those nasty things about you Bella. But the truth is that if you want to get your name out there, you are going to have to deal with pathetic angry people. It shouldn't matter what they say, but it will always hurt. The only thing you can do right now is know that you have friends who know the real you, and know just how beautiful you are on the inside just as well at the outside. When one of them hurts you like this, just remember how much we all care for you."

I was still holding onto his shirt, but I looked up after he finished his speech. He was always there to help me, to bring the strength I needed. "Edward," I whispered. "I'm thankful for you."

We held onto each other for a while, or maybe it was for a few seconds, but in that time I began to wish that he would like me more then a friend. But he wasn't leaning down to kiss me, he wasn't stroking my back anymore. He just stared at me.

"Bella…" Edward sighed.

Oh God, he was going to tell me that he can tell I have this stupid little crush on him, and now he is going to tell me that he doesn't feel the same, and that I just need to get over it.

My cell phone in my pocket began to ding, and vibrate, letting me know I had a text message.

**I just saw the Chelsea Lately show, are you alright? –Jacob**

I pulled farther away from Edward. Jacob is just as a nice guy as Edward is, and he is available, and interested. I can't ruin my friendship with Edward.

"That's Jacob," I whispered.

"Go ahead," Edward nodded. "Go call him; I'll clean up the rest."

"Thanks," I smiled weakly.

No, if Edward was interested, I would have been able to tell. He was just being a good friend, and my overactive imagination was running away with my false hope. Edward was right, I need to see myself more clearly, but I need to see my surroundings more clearly as well.

Edward and I cannot be together.

* * *

**Oh snap. I know I'm going to get a few pissed off people saying "why is Bella so stupid, and can't see that Edward likes her?"**

**Well, here is some food for thought. Girls are stupid. I'm sorry, I am a girl so I can say this. Whenever someone is interested in my friend, I think is it SO obvious, but when it comes to me, I just laugh it off and think 'no way could he be interested.' Girls tend to read too much on the little things, and dismiss the bigger stuff as the guy just being friendly.**

**Bella cannot see what is going on in Edward's mine like we can, and he is still being pretty subtle about his feelings towards her.**

**OK. I just did some basic out lines, and we have 10, maybe 11 (maybe 9) more chapters to go. So there is an end in sight, you just have to have really good vision to see it. Haha**

**The next chapter will be in Edward's POV and it will be called: _A 'how to seduce' for guys._**

**I'll let you use you imagination for what that is going to be about. SO until next time….**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	19. A ‘How to Seduce’ for Guys

**Happy December all! First and for most, I just want to say sorry for the delay. I got sick from Thanksgiving dinner! I know, that is sacrilegious. AND this chapter was reallllly hard to start off. I wrote like 4 different beginnings, and even know I could probably change it again. Oh well**

**SO Twilight came out. I know a lot of people are hating on it, but you know what I is freaking Twilight on film, I'm happy to get any kind of Twilight fix. Haha But I liked it**

**Thank you for all the reviews, you have no idea how much they make me smile. And Shout out to my betas. _Gemmabobella and Muff'Nbutter_ You guys are soooooo bad ass.**

**So yeah, lets just get started**

**I do not own Twilight.**

* * *

Chapter 19- A 'How to Seduce' for Guys

I watched Bella go back to her room as she started to scroll through her cell phone to find Jacob's number. What was surprising was that I wasn't angry that she was going to seek comfort from him at the moment. If it brought her any kind of peace, then how could I be upset with that? But a part of me knew that she had already calmed, that what Jacob was dealing with at this moment, was a more peaceful version of Bella. Because of me.

Plus, I was a little relieved that Jacob called when he did. It is not safe looking into Bella's eyes. It makes me want to tell her how much I loved her, and although she was somewhat on the outs with Jacob, I needed feel like she was slightly more prepared so that she could handle my feelings for her.

As for now, I'll just have to continue to marvel at how I helped her.

While I sat on the couch with our friends, I still felt that warmth in me of when she told me that she was thankful for me. I was helping her, I made her feel better.

"So, is she doing alright?" Jasper asked once I had settled myself on the couch.

"Better," I nodded. "She is just going to go talk to Jacob right now." I ignored the looks that my friends gave me.

"I just cannot believe that those people would say such horrible things," Esme shook her head. "People are so cruel."

"The worst part is that I know there is nothing in the law against what they did, so I can't arrest them," Charlie grunted. "It shouldn't be legal to say those kinds of things."

"If Bella wants to get more publicity with her books, then she is going to have to grow some thick skin," Rose sighed. "Compared to what they can say, those people were pretty easy on her."

"It goes along with the territory," Emmett nodded.

"She was warned in the beginning," Alice chipped in. "It's not fair, but she had been pretty lucky so far for not getting harassed earlier."

"She is a strong girl," Carlisle spoke up. "Bella will be able to get through this."

Bella came out about twenty minutes later; she may have had a smile on her face, but I could tell that it didn't reach her eyes. She came over and grinned at me, and in that instant I saw her eyes light up.

Everyone hung around until late into the night. Charlie decided to stay for the night again, and I gave up my bed for him again. I didn't lie to Charlie when I said that I had work to do. There was still that Andrew Lloyd Webber song that I had been working on.

I was almost finished with it, the song, or really more like a lullaby, and it was definitely my best work yet. It was because I had the best inspiration, Bella. I started writing it when I discovered I loved her, and it had progressively grown since then.

It was still her 'voice' but with more power now, and with a different meaning. I didn't place my voice in this song. This song was not about me or her, or even what I feel for her - it is about what I _feel_ when I see her.

At first I was startled to discover that it was a lullaby, but the more I thought about it, the more it made sense to me. When I look at Bella, I feel safe, at peace, and I feel a promise. A lullaby is sung by someone who loves you, which brings a certain comfort. It is meant to lull you to sleep, which requires peace. And every night holds the promise for tomorrow; because even if I may not be able to be with Bella now, knowing that she is going to be safe and alive tomorrow brings me a different type of promise.

Mr. Webber never specified on what the song needed to be like, his only specification was that it needed to be great, and even I had to admit it was great - it was about Bella.

The next day Charlie left with a big portion of the Thanksgiving leftovers that we had. Then it was just us two.

We were probably still recovering from the actual Thanksgiving day meal, and all we wanted to do was to sit around the apartment, and watch some really lame, yet still funny movies. Life was good. We fell back into our old routine of getting up and eating breakfast together. I played my piano, while she wrote. Only now we spent our nights watching movies and coming up with different ways to eat turkey.

Although Bella never mentioned the TV show incident, I could tell that she was still a little sour about it. When I caught her glaring at the TV remote, I asked her why. She responded telling me that she was boycotting all TV, but was upset because she was now missing her favorite TV show. After two episodes of her making me reenact it for her, Bella finally decided to show some mercy and watch TV again.

To put it simply, life was good.

It was the afternoon of the first, the day before Jacob was supposed to arrive, and I was trying not to think about it. But I couldn't help but mope around the house, and not in a discreet way. Bella could tell I was upset and continued to try and cheer me up, although I did suspect that she knew what I was upset about, because she never mentioned him.

We were at my piano, and she was showing me some of her "skills" as she had put it. Bella stretched out her fingers and sat up straighter, and then a serious expression glazed over her face. With a deep breath, Bella placed her fingers on the keys, and already I knew what was coming. I didn't even try to hold back my laughter as Bella played the worst version of chopsticks I had ever heard. But when she grinned at me, I knew she was doing this to make me feel better.

Once her performance was complete, I clapped wildly as she bowed as much as her sitting position would allow her.

"That is my new favorite piece," I laughed. "But just the way you played it, no other way."

Bella laughed. "What can I say," she shrugged. "I have a talent."

"Yeah, maybe you should give up that whole 'writing career' and just start up as a pianist." I started to stroke the keys, a new part to the lullaby popped in my head.

"What happened to that new song you were working on?" Belle asked in a quiet voice.

I furrowed my brow, "What new song?" there was no way that she could have heard the lullaby.

"The one that sounds like a lullaby."

Okay, then maybe she has heard it. "When did you hear it?"

I wasn't sure if I was upset that she heard it, or worried whether she liked it. I wasn't upset at her, more towards myself. I like to keep my unfinished pieces to myself.

"A few weeks ago… when you all kind of disappeared," she shifted in her seat uncomfortably. "Anyway, I was coming home, and I heard you playing something, I kind of listened through the door, in a totally creepy I'm-stalking-you kind of a way… I'm sorry, I should have left when I heard-"

"Bella," I cut her off. "Don't be ridiculous, you have every right to listen, it's your home, and you shouldn't feel guilty at all, I'm sorry for making you feel like a stalker," I added with a smile.

Bella laughed, looking relieved.

"So what did you think of it?" I asked coolly. Inside, however, I was freaking out big time. This song, this lullaby, was the best thing I have done, and if she didn't like it…

"I love it," Bella's face lit up. "I didn't hear much of it, but what I heard… it was beautiful, Edward."

I let out a breath that I didn't know I was holding.

"So, what was you inspiration," she asked, although I thought I heard a bit of sadness laced into her voice. I must be going crazy.

"Now that, I'm sorry, I cannot reveal," I grinned to her. "At least not until it is finished."

Bella pouted, and all I wanted to do was kiss those full lips.

"But you will tell me eventually, won't you?" she sulked, but I could see the humor in her chocolate eyes – the same eyes that held my heart so completely, and I wanted to tell her right then and there.

"Bella I'll tell you everything you want me to."

We looked at each other, and it reminded me very much of what happened on Thanksgiving. And the same thought occurred to me now, like it did to me then. I can't tell her how I feel, or at least not completely.

Even if in some other world she did have feelings for me, I still wouldn't be able to tell her how much I cared about her and loved her. We were not on the same levels. We wouldn't be able to start a relationship given where we both are. I know how much I love her, and how I want to grow old with her, and love her more and more with each day. But if we were to start a relationship right here, right now, all she would feel for me is 'like'. The same kind of like that she has for Jacob. It's not love.

I can tell it's not love. She looked at me with friendship, and trust, and other qualities that I couldn't identify. But if it was love, the kind of true, overpowering, the-reason-why-you-live love, I would be able to see it.

It is times like these that I have to be careful at how I look at her. Because even if I allow myself just the slightest bit of room to show how I feel, I would scare her off. And the idea of her not being in my life was a thought too much for me to even bear.

So, I walk this fine line of wanting Bella in my life; so much so that I'm willing to remain her friend and only her friend if that is what it took. But at the exact same time, I have this image, this idea, this hope of how it would be like for us to be together. To love each other equally, and fully until the day we both die, and even beyond that.

I have decided to fight for her, but it is a fight where what I am risking is almost not worth the reward. I have to fight carefully, and not allow myself to be a 'drama queen' as the others had put it. I cannot overreact, or lose my tempter. I had to walk this line very, very carefully.

The shrill sound of a phone disrupted both Bella's and my thoughts. Bella dug threw her pocket and pulled out her cell phone, and answered it with a slight exasperated look on her face.

"Hey, Alice," she sighed. "Nothing much, just amazing Edward with my piano skills." Bella smirked at me. "Okay, hold on," she looked over at me. "Alice says 'hi'."

"Hi, Alice!" I yelled so she could hear me.

Bella laughed then went back to listening to Alice. She nodded her head a few times, but she seemed more focused on outlining the keys on the piano.

"Yeah, I know people are jerks." Bella covered the mouth piece to the cell, then leaned over to me. "Someone scratched her car."

"Poor Alice," I nodded sympathetically, while Bella rolled her eyes. Alice had a very nice yellow Porsche; I would be angry is someone scratched my Italian sports car.

I felt Bella stiffen next to me, "Err, no… he comes in tomorrow." They're talking about Jacob.

After a few more, "Mmm-hmm" and "yeah's" later, Bella hung up. The light atmosphere somehow seemed to have darkened slightly.

"So Jacob comes home tomorrow," I attempted to say brightly.

"Yeah," she sighed. "He is spending December in Seattle, so that'll be exciting."

Only she didn't sound excited.

"But he'll be flying out of town regularly for games, and whatever sports people may do," she shook her head. "That means I'll actually have to watch a game."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Are you telling me that after living with Charlie, you never watched a sports game?"

"I mean, sure I was in the same room as him while he watched whatever game was on, but I always had a book with me. Now I feel like I'm going to be graded with how well I watch."

"Oh, poor Bella," I laughed.

I prepared for Jacob's arrival as well as I could. I had my mocking smirk ready, my threatening glances honed, and my comment with double meanings sharpened down like a blade.

I was ready; ready for him to criticize me, ready for him to mark his territory. I was ready for the jackass I have been dealing with for the past few weeks. What I was not ready for, was what showed up the next night.

Jacob was being nice; not just nice, but friendly. He shook my hand, and patted my back, as if we were long times friends, just being reunited for the first time in 20 years. He involved me in the conversations, and listened to what I had to say, and agreed with me most of the time.

He was a dirty cheating bastard.

He was playing the nice guy. He showed a bit of his true colors the day he left before Thanksgiving, and that did not play out to his advantage. He was trying to get back on Bella's good side, and to do that, he had to be nice to me.

That dirty, cheating, fucking, bastard!

But if he wanted to play Mr. nice guy, then I could do nice guy. I smiled, and laughed at his jokes. I complimented him, and even went so far as to offer him to hang out sometime. For a second, I thought he was going to crack, but he quickly recovered and accepted my offer. It was like a fight where we just circled each other, but never actually hit.

Not for now at least.

Of course we never actually went along with the false hang out offer. I actually never really saw him. Bella would split her days between me and him, and would meet up with Jacob wherever they were going.

Since Jacob was not in my way, I could finally start getting Bella to fall for me. However, I drew a blank once more.

As much as I appreciated Emmett's and Jasper's advice, I really didn't like the outcome of having to watch Bella kiss Jacob. So I went to the only person who really has given me the best advice so far: Alice.

I called her earlier in the morning, quickly telling her what I needed help with. She told me to meet her over at a café for lunch, and that Rosalie would be there as well.

I found the two girls with their foreheads almost pressed up together, and both of them talking rapidly, and I was unable to make out any words as I got closer. Rose popped out of the crowd with her bright blond hair, and bright red turtleneck top and very tight, black skinny jeans. Alice was just as noticeable in her white sweater-like top and white pants. I cleared my throat the let them know I was there, and sat down, facing Rose and Alice; making me extremely nervous.

"Ok, so I filled Rose in on every little detail!" Alice informed me.

"And I must say I am very disappointed that you went to Emmett and Jasper for advice," Rose frowned at me.

I felt my mouth drop, "But I didn't… I mean… they didn't help?"

"Oh, please," Rose rolled her eyes. "That little plan theirs, of seeing who is more macho, that has Emmett written all over it."

"And I bet Jazz was there, and went along with everything Emmett said," Alice sighed. "And right after I told him he wasn't allowed to give advice."

"I don't want them to think I told on them," God, I felt like I was back in elementary school, and my two best buds just got caught.

"Don't worry, you didn't rat them out," Rose laughed.

"But let's get to the matter at hand, shall we?" Alice nodded to me.

I quickly explained to them my worries about if Bella and I were to start a relationship now, how we wouldn't be at the same level. And now I felt like I needed to get her to fall for me, so that way I have some type of chance. After they both agreed with me, I went on to tell them how Jacob was now trying to play the nice card, but I haven't seen him since he arrived, leaving me time with Bella.

"Well this is definitely your time to move in," Rose nodded.

"Now this is the point where you show Bella what you have to offer," Alice added.

"Err… what do I have to offer?" This was already starting to sound like a bad idea.

While Rose rolled her eyes (yet again) Alice explained. "Okay, so Bella already knows you. She knows that you're a great friend, good listener, and you have a pretty good job."

"What you have to do is to get her to not think of you as, 'just a friend'," Rose crossed her arms as if she had just made this great revelation for me.

"Well, obviously I don't want her to think of me as 'just a friend.' good job with that discovery, Rose," I scoffed.

"If you would just let us finish…" she said as she glared at me.

"Rose and I have been thinking about this," Alice interceded. "And we placed ourselves in your situation. What would I do to get Jasper to notice me?"

"You've got to seduce her!" Rose smirked.

"Yep, whenever I want Jazz's attention, I pull out the short skirts, tight tops, anything to make him look," Alice described.

"But the way to seduce properly is to have them look at you, and for you to turn them on, without actual physical contact with the other person- that is the tricky part," Rose looked very serious as she explained, and I wondered how many times in her life time she has played this game.

"I can't wear short skirts," I stated lamely.

"Exactly," Alice patted my hand as if I were one of the slower students who just learned to spell their name.

"Basically think of this as a 'How-to-seduce' lesson," Rose grinned.

"But for guys," Alice added.

"Alright… so what do I need to do?" This seemed a lot more complicated than Emmett's plan.

"So, Rose and I thought about what we would think is sexy when we look at our guys," Alice pulled out a little note pad. "And it all comes down to three things really."

"One," Rose continued. "You've got to show off your strength."

"Go to the gym, and show off how much you can bench press," Alice suggested.

"I love to watch Emmett work on his back," Rose let out a contented sigh.

"Oh! I love it when Jasper runs on the treadmill," Alice fanned herself with her hand, as if the temperature in the room had just increased. "I don't know why, but when I see that boy run…and with that much stamina, it reminds me of when we…"

"Ahem," I cleared my throat loudly. "Yeah, I think I get it. Show off how strong I am, got it."

"Right," Alice giggled. "Number two: show off you body!"

"Isn't that the same thing as showing off my strength?" I asked.

"Oh God, no," Rose shook her head. "There are plenty strong guys, but the moment they take off their shirt, they are not physically fit. Strength and body are two entirely different things!"

"I would suggest that you go to the pool and show off your body there, but it's winter, and really hard to find an indoor pool," Alice sighed.

"Maybe if all his clothes were conveniently dirty…" Rose trailed off.

"I feel like a piece of meat," I grumbled. "Why can't I just work out with my shirt off?"

"Too much," Alice explained quickly. "If you were just trying to sleep with her, then yeah, work out with you shirt off, but if you want her to keep thinking about you, you've got to spread out."

"Number three," Rose continued. "Show her that you care."

"That is something that will always be sexy for me," Alice nodded. "Whenever Jasper shows me that he cares…" Alice sighed, along with Rose, who I'm sure was thinking about Emmett.

"Alright," I nodded. "So, I can't do all this in a single day?"

"Nope, spread it out," Alice spread her hands apart to go along with what she said.

"Okay, I can seduce her, how hard can it really be?" I shrugged.

"Not too hard," Rose agreed, "So long as you just don't make a complete idiot of yourself."

It had been a week since Jacob arrived when I finally got my chance. I had woken up a little earlier than usual and went to the kitchen to go grab myself some water when I saw Bella filling up her water bottle.

"Hey, I didn't wake you did I?" Bella asked as she shoved her water bottle in her bright yellow workout bag.

"No," I eyed her fitted outfit. She had on tight yoga-like black pants, with a very snug white top. I had to remind myself to look back up. "I was just about to go get ready to go to the gym."

"Really?" Bella smiled. "I was about to go too, I'll wait up for you and we can work out together."

"That sounds great!" I nodded.

"It's weird we've never worked out together, have we?" Bella bit her lip, and I could tell that she was wondering why.

I shrugged. "It was something I did with the guys so I got to know Emmett better, and hang out with Jasper more. Plus, you always make a big deal about people watching you work out."

"I do not," she pouted.

"Oh, yes, you're right, I'm sorry," I smirked. "I must have imagined all those times you came home complaining that every person in the gym was looking at you… yeah, you're not paranoid."

"I'm leaving," Bella turned on her heal and started to walk to the front door, with an amused smile on her face.

"Give me five minutes!"

The ride to the gym was quiet; not the uneasy type of silence that makes you fidget, but the kind of silence which brings peace that people live for.

Once we arrived at the gym, we quickly went our separate ways to the locker room to set our bags away. I was the first to get to the gym, and I immediately started to list off what Rose and Alice had told me: arms, back, and running. And I made sure to wear a t-shirt, and nothing too revealing. Alice had said something about letting Bella use her imagination.

And I've got to show off.

"So what do you want to hit first?" Bella asked, sneaking up from behind me.

"What do you usually do?" I didn't want to make it completely obvious that I was showing off.

"Upper body," Bella nodded.

"Upper body it is." I lead the way.

Bella walked over to the far left corner of the gym where all of the upper body equipment was. I followed her lead as she sat down on a machine to do curl ups. She plugged in the ear pieces from her Ipod and went to work.

I knew that I was there to get her to watch me, but I couldn't help but position myself at a pull up machine right behind her so I could watch her. Alice and Rose were right; there was something very sexy about working out. Very sexy…I think I need to move machines.

I walked over to the bench press, which happened to conveniently be placed right Bella's line of sight. I strapped on the weights and positioned myself under the bar. I figured that I wanted to go slow at first, and slowly add on the weight.

I took a breath and gripped the bar. With one quick glance, I saw that Bella was openly watching me. Perfect.

My arms fell into the familiar rhythm of when I worked out, and by the time I finished this rep I could feel my muscles pulse, giving my arms a more defined look. I jumped off the bench and added more weights, and went back to do my rep, all the while under Bella's watchful stare. Three more times I did this, and each time I saw Bella's eyes widen. She had switched to another machine to work on her underarms, but was still in watching distance from me.

Good, now my back.

I sat on the bench to catch my breath while Bella walked over to me. "I had no idea that you were that strong," she gaped.

I shrugged and attempted to act as nonchalant as I could. "It really wasn't that much, if I had one of the guys here I could have put on more; but I don't have a spotter so I'm not going to take the risk."

That was not completely true; I probably should have had a spotter on the last rep, but she didn't need to know that.

"Wow," she said again.

"I have one more machine to do, and then I'm good here," I offered. "How about you?"

"Yeah, same here."

Rose had mentioned shoulders and back. So I walked over to a machine where I sat on a bench with my chest up against padding. After I set the weight at a very respectable and impressive amount, I braced my hold on the bars that were right above me and pulled them down.

Bella was right behind me working on her shoulders as well. I didn't have a chance to steal a glance at her without making me look like a complete idiot, so I just kept up with my work out, and hoped that she was watching. There were a couple of woman that walked by who stared at me as if I were their next meal.

After a few more minutes I let the machine slam back down, and I stretched my arms while I looked for Bella. She was already walking up to me, her face flushed from her workout.

"I'm going to go head over to the treadmill," she smiled.

Treadmill + stamina = sexy

"Cool, I was going to do that too."

We found two open treadmills set up right next to each other. We didn't talk. Instead we listened to music and ran. My pace was a bit more then a jog, but not quite running; but after 20 minutes I was starting to build a sweat. Bella was at a steady jog next to me, and we would exchange friendly smiles.

It didn't look like it was working. Bella was not checking me out like some of the other women here. Maybe I was doing something wrong. I probably should have taken off my shirt when I started running. It would probably be a little too obvious if I tried to take off my shirt now. I can't stop running just to take off my shirt; then I'd have to work my way back up to this pace. And I'm running too fast that if I were to try to take off my shirt while I run, I'll probably eat shit, and look like a complete idiot. Or-

"Edward," Bella panted next to me. "I'm done here, how about you?"

"Yeah, I'm in a definite need of a shower."

She didn't even look fazed. Sure her face was all red, and she was breathing heavily, but that was because of her workout, not me.

We got home, had a quick breakfast, and then went our separate ways. Conversation flowed, and there were not any uncomfortable silences as if she was thinking of me naked; this was a complete failure.

I waited until I heard Bella's shower going on until I called Alice explaining her how it went at the gym.

"It didn't work at all," I huffed and tossed myself on my bed.

"There is a reason why we told you to spread it all out," Alice sighed for the fifth time. "She isn't going to fall for you overnight. Edward don't worry, you already planted the seed."

I let out a breath and closed my eyes. "You're right, I just need to wait. No instant gratification for me."

The next thing I needed to do was show off my body. A concept that was much easier said then done, and I continued to gain respect for women who were able to make this look easy. However my opportunity came only a few days later.

On Friday I ran out of toothpaste and borrowed some from Bella. Normally I would have just brought my toothbrush over to her bathroom, get some paste, then go back to my room. However it was at the exact moment that when I reached for her toothpaste that I heard my cell phone go off.

I grabbed the toothpaste and ran back to my room to catch the call. It turned out to be Emmett, so I just brushed my teeth as I talked to him; however I was not paying attention and I left Bella's toothpaste on my counter in my bathroom.

All of this would not seem like anything, if I hadn't been getting ready to take a shower later on that night, at the exact time Bella was looking for her toothpaste.

I had water going, trying to warm up as I stripped out of the jeans and t-shirt I had worn for the day. As I tossed my clothes onto my bed, I glanced down at the counter and saw Bella's toothpaste, and mentally kicked myself for taking it with me.

I walked over to the shower, and allowed myself one last look at myself in the mirror. I was naturally fit, but with the workouts I became muscular as well. My abs were defined, my chest strong, and my shoulders broad. Women had always admired and made comments about my arms, and how prominent the muscles were. But even then, I was still no Emmett. Now that guy has some serious muscles on him. However I had always felt like I had a good balance.

Jacob seemed to be more on the Emmett side of the muscle scale, maybe that was what Bella likes. If that were the case then I would just have to go the gym more.

I eased myself into the shower, and let the hot water sting my skin. There was a small window on the side of the shower, which I had opened so the mirrors and the sliding glass door didn't fog up.

There was nothing hiding me as I showered. There were two rolling glass doors as shower curtains, and if it wasn't for my towel, which was folded and hanging on the bar attached to the glass door (which was strategically placed so it was covering my goods if I stood in the right spot), I would be totally exposed.

With a quick squirt from my bottle of body wash, I started soaping up. Which was exactly when I heard a knock on my door.

"Hey Edward," Bella called out. "I know you're showering, but when you're done can I borrow your toothpaste, I can't find mine."

Well, if I needed to show body…

I positioned myself so that only the towel covered the family jewels. "I can't quite hear you. You can come in, I'm decent." _Enough_, I added to myself.

"Oh, you haven't got into the shower yet?" I heard her ask as she opened the door.

Bella froze, and her face reddened more then I have ever seen. Her mouth dropped, and it seemed as is she couldn't find a place to look at, that wasn't my body.

"Yeah, I borrowed your toothpaste earlier today, but I forgot to bring it back to your room," I explained casually as I continued to lather my body. "I'm really sorry, it won't happen again."

"No, no… it's fine," Bella darted her eyes and focused on the ground. "I'm just going to grab it, and go brush my teeth."

She glanced up at me, her eyes widened again then she looked back at the floor. "Because my teeth need to be clean."

Bella snatched the toothpaste and started backing up to the door, all the while shooting glances at me. "Because you know what they say: an apple a day keeps the… dentist…away. Oof!" Bella backed into the door frame, and looked at me one last time, her eyes quickly soaking in everything.

"I've got to go." She turned around and dashed out of my bathroom.

"Well, that was an improvement," I laughed to myself.

When I saw Bella again she blushed feverishly, and wouldn't look me in the eye. After a quick apology, and a few laughs later, we were back to normal. Only now she had a pretty good idea of what I looked like naked.

She spent all of Saturday with Jacob, but only because he was going away in few days, and they wouldn't see each other until the New Year. Everything was working in my favor, even the weather.

This winter has been a very historical one. It has been so cold that it froze Green Lake practically solid, which hasn't happened since 1930. Now people all over Seattle were driving out to go ice skating on the lake. I had already told Bella that I wanted to go out for Sunday night, and to dress warm. I knew that if I told her what I had planned she would fight me.

"Why did I have to bring two different types of snow coats?" Bella asked as she reclined in the passenger seat of my Volvo.

"Because I don't want you to get cold," I wondered how soft her hands were as they sat in her lap.

"So we are going outside?" she raised one eyebrow.

"What tipped you off?" I asked sarcastically. "The two coats, the mittens, or this skycap?"

"But it's cold," she looked out her window at the frozen bare trees.

"This is why I made you bring the two snow coats."

I pulled up to the public parking space, and was amazed to see all the lights in the trees as they outlined the lake standing out perfectly with the dark stare fill night. There were people of all ages skating along; couples, parents, kids, and friends.

"Please tell me that you brought me out here to go to that café?" Bella pointed to the small little coffee shop just off the lake.

I walked to the back of the trunk and pulled out one pair of ice skates, and one pair of hockey skates. "Surprise!"

"Edward!" Bella whined. "What could ever make you think that I am capable of balancing myself on thin blades, and on ice to top it off!" She stomped her foot.

"Wow, temper tantrum much?" I grinned.

"When I fall, I'm going to aim for you," she glared at me before she marched off to a bench.

"I hope so," I mumbled to myself.

I had made a promise to myself that Bella would not fall. And she was making that really difficult for me. It was a feat just getting her to stand without loosing her balance. Once I managed to get her standing, I placed myself right behind her, griped her hips then slowly started to push her.

There were a few times when Bella would tumble forward, but I would use the muscles that I worked for to good use, and held her up. I really thought that there would be some type of progress, other then getting her to stand in one place. But as the night wore on I realized that the only way we could skate is if I held on to Bella, and we would skate side by side. Which worked out for me.

Despite Bella's "near death experiences" as she had put it; I could tell she was having fun. Her giggles were mixed in with squeals, and her smile rotated with a look of fear.

We took a break from skating and went over to the café we saw earlier to have some hot chocolate.

Once we realized how warm it was inside the tiny café, we decided on not going back outside, and just spend the rest of the night people watching.

"I love this month," Bella let out a contented sigh and held her hot chocolate closer.

"Because of the presents?" I asked in mock shock.

"No," she giggled. "It's the lights. There isn't any other month that has this many beautiful lights out. It's almost as if they have the power to make anyone's mood better, it does for me at least."

"The lights make me happy too," I added softly.

Bella let out a groan, "But this is the one month where I am forced to go Christmas shopping so I can get everyone's presents."

"Well, if it doesn't make you happy, then you don't have to get me a present," I said seriously.

Bella shook her head. "It's not really the shopping part; it's more of me worrying that everyone will like what I get them."

"I'll like whatever you get me Bella," I leaned back into my chair.

"Oh, I know you will," she laughed confidently.

I raised an eyebrow. "So you already got me a present?"

"I'm not telling," she took a sip from her cup, a lock of her hair falling to her face.

"Alright, then I'll just keep in mind that you got me an amazing present when I go shopping for you, and I'll just have to get you a really, really, really big present."

"I take it back," Bella said quickly. "It is a horrible present; you are going to absolutely hate it!"

"Bella, how else am I supposed to show you that I care, other then buying you ridiculously expensive and gigantic presents?" I kept my voice light and joking, but I hoped that she was taking this conversation as seriously as I was.

"I can tell by your actions Edward," Bella chuckled as she closed her eyes and leaned back into her chair.

"I hope you do," I whispered to myself the second time that night.

* * *

**So, I'm predicting a mixture of frustration, with a collective "aww". And a whole lot of "yay naked Edward!" haha**

**I know, I'm dragging this out. But I need to show that Edward is working for this. He is not just sitting back and wallowing, he wants to be with Bella and is fighting for her.**

**Like I said, there will probably be about 10 chapters left. So just keep that in mind. And also I'll be taking things a little bit more serious as the chapters are coming. I really want to get one good light hearted chapter in here before I go off into… where I'm going.**

**Green Lake! SOOOO I did my research, and I have no idea if it is abnormally cold right now in Seattle, but back in 1930 Green Lake did freeze, and people did skate on it. So it's not impossible.**

**Next chapter will be called: _Under the Mistletoe_**

**Yeah, I think that you guys have a good guess there. Haha**

I hope you enjoyed :)


	20. Under the Mistletoe

**Hello all! So here is chapter 20. Under the Mistletoe. Am I going just mess with you all and tease? Or will there actually be an under the mistletoe moment. Hmm… we'll see.**

**SO as you can tell, you can see that this chapter is particularly long. 25 awesome pages of single space size 12 fount. Do NOT expect the other chapters to be this long, this was a one time thing. There was just so much, and it would be too mean to cut it half way.**

**I am visiting family up in Portland, Oregon right now, and we are snowed in. Like hard core snowed in. For someone who grew up in So Cal, by the beach this is crazy for me.**

**Second. I just want to say that I LOVE seeing all the people from other Countries reading this, it makes me smile all the time. BUT I saw that I have some readers in CHILE. I am half Chilean, practically all of my family was born there, I have been there a few times. So I just want to say WHAT'S UP????**

**Thank you to my readers, to the people who comment, and to my Betas. You all give me warm fuzzy feelings inside.**

**I do NOT own Twilight.**

* * *

Chapter 20- Under the Mistletoe

Bella's POV

I woke up bright and early Monday morning, eager to go to my meeting. I told Edward last night during our ride home from the lake that Rose, Alice and I had a meeting this morning, and I probably wouldn't see him until later on that night. My second half of the day would be spent with Jacob, getting more time with him before he left in a couple days.

Sporting my brand new long deep purple cardigan over a black shirt and nice designer light washed jeans, I knew Alice would approve-thus getting her off my back. And I would need her on my good side, because I had a lot more to talk to them about than just business…

As usual, I was the last to arrive. Rose was sitting behind her large desk, paperwork already starting to pile up. All I could see was a dark brown silk blouse that I could only assume went with a perfectly matched pencil skirt. Alice was totally working it today with a flawlessly tailored black slacks, shoes to kill, and a sexy, yet classy, blood red razor jacket as she sat in one of the chairs across from Rose.

They nodded to me and continued to talk while I made my way to the empty guest seat.

"So, I decided on what colors I'm going to with for the wedding!" Alice cheered. Thankfully, I didn't have to help out that much with the wedding. I loved Alice to death, but there was no way that I could completely assist with the wedding without some type of double homicide going on. And that would just ruin the mood of the wedding.

Luckily, Alice found her 'Twin of Good Fashion,' as Alice had put it. Even I had to say that Janet, the wedding planner, was handling all of Alice's demands in stride. From what I'd heard, she even was able to scout out an open ballroom in Seattle's Olympic Fairmont Hotel for the reception. That place had over a year's wait list, and yet somehow Janet had managed to get a room on the date Alice wanted. When I asked Alice how she managed that, Alice just shook her head and told me not to question.

My writer's imagination went wild.

"What are they?" Rose asked when Alice took a dramatic pause.

"Yellow and pink!" Alice beamed as if she had just found out the meaning of life. And I had always thought that it was 42.

"And not an overly obnoxious yellow and pink," explained Alice. "But very soft, gentle spring colors."

"So the bridesmaid dresses will be…" Rose trailed off.

"Yellow, with pink trimmings." Alice's face was serious now. "You guys each get to choose how you want to style the dress as long as it goes just below the knee, and it is not the same top style as mine."

"Have you found your dress already?" I asked. Damn, I was a horrible friend if I missed that.

"Oh, Lord, no!" Alice sighed. "You two will definitely need to be there with me when I go shopping for that."

"Alright, now that the first order of business is complete," Rose gathered some of the papers on her desk and looked over at me. "We need to talk about the interview/photo shoot with Cosmo you have coming up."

"Oh, yeah, I forgot about that," I mused.

"Which is why we are having this meeting," Rosalie looked at some of the paperwork. "So, you are going to be in the Valentine's Day issue. Now, I couldn't get you to be on the cover, but they are doing a special on 30 Single Women Under 30."

"But I'm not single." Sure, Jacob and I were still a relatively new couple, but we were still a couple. I didn't want to do false advertising.

Rose waved her hand. "When they say 'single' they don't mean that you don't have a boyfriend, it means that you aren't married." That sounded reasonable. "They are going to interview you while you do the photo shoot," Rose continued, "and it will be done on the fifteenth of next month."

Alice looked at me with a pleading expression. "I thought it was going to be sooner than that, and I had already scheduled a really important meeting that I have with a possible future customer, so I won't be there."

I felt my mouth drop. "But you said you were going to be there!" I turned to Rose. "What about you?"

"I already have plans," she shook her head. "Sorry."

"So, what, I'm going alone?" Oh, all of the things that could go wrong.

"You could always take one of the guys," offered Alice.

"Emmett is swamped next month with meetings," Rose sighed. "He is going to be really busy, I don't think he'll have time to help out."

"And Jasper said that he is waiting to hear from some museum about a piece they have that they think is a fraud." Alice leaned back in her chair.

We all sat quiet, wondering who could come with me.

"Hey, I have an idea," Rose sat up. "How about you take Edward!"

"Yes, Rose, that's a great idea!" Alice cheered.

I blushed. And they didn't miss it.

"Why the blush, Bella?" Rose asked.

When I didn't answer, Alice kept pushing. "Does it have to do with Edward?"

My blushed increased as I thought about Edward in the gym, in the shower, and at the lake. Yep, I was blushing.

"Tell!" ordered Rose.

"It's nothing," I stuttered. But once I saw the set looks on their faces, I knew there was no backing out of it. "Well, this last week has been kind of… odd," I started.

"What kind of odd?" Alice shifted so she was facing me more directly.

"I guess it started when Edward and I went to the gym together," I thought back to when he was under the bench press. I knew he was strong, but damn, that boy was packing some muscles!

"Did he turn out to be completely weak?" Rose asked with a disgusted look on her face.

"No," I laughed. "He turned out to be strong, like really strong."

"So, what is odd about that?" Alice asked me, eyes wide.

"Nothing… I guess…" I didn't tell them how I couldn't keep my eyes off of him in the gym, mesmerized by how he lifted the weights with such ease. Or how sexy I thought it was when we ran side by side; him at a fast pace, never slowing down. How could I not help but think about what type of stamina he might have?

"Anything else that was odd?" I heard Alice ask.

I felt my skin blaze, and I tried to duck my head down to avoid their watchful gaze, but they caught it.

"Spill, Bella," Rose commanded.

"So, I kind of… well it was an accident… and he said it was okay to come in… but I didn't think…" I focused on a freckle on the back of my hand, praying that would be enough of an explanation for both of them.

"Bella…" Alice warned.

Damn their need for details.

After a very long, deep breath, the story began to spill out of my mouth. "I lost my toothpaste and I went over to ask Edward if he had some that I could borrow. I heard the shower going, but it had just started so I thought I could catch him before he got in. And when he heard it was me well he called me in and said it was okay, and when I came in… he was in the shower."

"Wait," gaped Alice. "You mean the shower in his bathroom, the one that used to be my shower?"

"Yes, Alice, he wasn't showering in my bathroom," I grumbled.

Alice erupted into wild laughter, while Rose looked between the two of us.

"Am I missing something here?" she asked. "What's so funny about that? Wasn't the shower curtain covering him?"

Alice calmed down to explain. "Rose, remember when that night when you and Emmett came over to have a scary movie night with me Bella? And I went to go take shower after we watched Psycho, and Emmett wanted to come in and freak me out while I was showering by shaking the shower curtain?"

"Oh, yeah," Rose nodded her head as a smile creped on her face. "But he didn't know that it was a glass door instead of a shower curtain, and the only thing that covered you was that towel on that bar on the door covering your who-ha and your arms crossed over your chest." Rose started to laugh as well. "He screamed louder then any of the girls in the movies and ran out of there, and straight into a wall."

We all laughed at that memory.

"Wait, so you saw Edward completely naked?" Rose was able to gasp out.

"No," I paused. "That towel was covering him."

They went back into hysterics.

"Well done," Alice murmured to herself.

"What do you mean 'well done'?" I threw my hands in the air. "I did not plan on seeing him basically naked." Nor did I plan on how I kept thinking about practically naked, soap suds clinging to his chest, his abs, and I'm sure his…

"Was he nice to look at?" Rose asked.

"Very," I promptly nodded before I could go on with earlier thoughts.

"I bet he'd be," Alice and Rose giggled.

"But what about Jacob?" I wondered out loud.

"What about him?" Rose sat up straighter. "You didn't cheat on him. You were just enjoying the view."

"I guess," I thought about my words carefully. "It's just… odd."

"Why, Bella?" Alice asked innocently. "It's not like you like Edward."

I wanted to snort back a bitter laugh, but I would have to then explain why I was bitter. I would have to explain how I had been dealing with confusing feelings; feelings which I was sure had to be superficial and only surface deep - but were still confusing all the same. If I told them, they would get too excited and start trying to get me and Edward together, which would be all types of awkward and it would end up with me looking like a complete idiot.

"No, of course not," I shook my head; hoping they wouldn't be able to spot the hint of a lie. "I like Jacob, a lot actually."

That was true. While I wasn't spending time with Edward, I had been hanging out with Jacob and we were really making progress with our relationship. And I was definitely starting to like him much more.

Both Alice and Rose smiled at me, but I thought that there was something missing in each of their smiles.

"Well, any other weirdness?" Rose asked after a few moments of uncertain smiles.

I thought back to ice skating."Yes, but it wasn't really weird, it was more…"

"Sweet?" Alice hinted.

"Caring?" Rose suggested.

I looked between the two of them. "Yeah…" I said slowly. "How did you-?"

Alice cut me off. "I'm the psychic one, remember?"

I laughed. Oh, Alice and her psychic weirdness. "I'm sorry Miss Cleo, I forgot about your other worldly abilities."

"You are forgiven, and may proceed with the story," Alice waved me on.

"Well, it's not much," I bit my lip. "He took me ice skating on Green lake last night."

"But you can't ice skate," Rose looked incredulous at the thought.

"I know!" I cried.

"But knowing Edward, he probably held your hand the entire time," Alice sighed with a goofy grin on her face.

"No, we discovered that even holding my hand wasn't enough to keep me up," I laughed. "He had to go behind me and hold my waist. There were a bunch of times that I almost fell—should have fallen—but he never let me hit the ground once."

Rose and Alice let out a simultaneous "Awe."

"It was just Edward being… Edward," I stated in a small voice. "Whatever girl ends up with him will be very, very lucky. And probably not worthy."

Rose shrugged and went back to her paperwork. "You never know Bella, the girl that he goes after is probably going to be one hell of a woman."

I explained to Edward my magazine shoot situation, and he agreed to go along with enthusiasm. And then the next couple days were spent with Jacob mostly. He was leaving on Thursday and I wouldn't see him until after New Year's, and I was really going to miss him.

It was Thursday afternoon, and he had to head out to the airport in about a half hour. So naturally we were having a really long good bye kiss. We were in the apartment that he was renting during his time in Seattle; it had already come furnished, and was perfectly decorated for a rich young bachelor.

There was only one bedroom, with a monster king-sized bed and huge plasma TV. The other bedroom had been converted to a game room with a pool table, an old school Star Wars pinball machine, a dart board, and a large basket ball hoop with a net right below it so it would catch the ball.

The kitchen was, naturally, very small, and only had a small, unused, dinning table. The living room was set up with a mini movie theater screen and a very long black leather couch, which was where were currently located.

I was leaning back on one of the arms of the couch, and was slowly sinking as Jacob hovered right above me. He used his left arm to hold himself up by grasping the edge of the couch, instantaneously trapping me in the couch. Not that I minded.

His right hand was being put to good use as it roamed my still clothed body. He was holding my left thigh, but he hitched my leg up so it wrapped around him. His large hand traveled slowly, and tantalizingly up my leg, brushing up my backside, until he rested his very skilled hand on my breast.

I had my hand tangled in his hair, loving the feeling of its roughness against my hands. But in reality I was just keeping his lips pressed against mine. Oh, those lips that made me forget about everything. He was firm and took the lead, pressing me farther into the couch.

No matter how firm my hold was on his head, he was still able to lift himself as if my hands weren't there at all. He started to kiss away from my lips, and I knew where they were going so I didn't fight him on breaking the kiss.

My breath was getting heavier as he adeptly flicked his tongue against the skin on my neck. He sucked on the sensitive skin right below my ear, and I let out a hissing noise which he noted his approval of by massaging my breast and sucking harder on my neck.

After a few minutes he brought the hand from my chest down my stomach, and started to play with the buttons of my jeans. I felt him undo the first button. I had a very Lost in Space moment, where my inner robot started to scream out "Danger Will Robinson, danger!"

"Jacob," I panted. "Jacob, stop. Stop." I heard him groan, and not in the good way. He pushed himself off of me and put more than the necessary amount of space in between us. I sat up straighter and adjusted my shirt; I would get to my hair later. "Look, I'm sorry, but I'm not ready yet."

"Yeah, I know," he sighed and leaned back into the couch with his eyes closed. "I just got a little… worked up." I glanced down at the bulge in his pants. He was much more than a little worked up.

"Come on, Jake," I laughed, trying to lighten the mood. "Do you really think that sex with me would last-" I looked over at the clock, and laughed some more, "-only fifteen minuets? If so, than you are definitely not going anywhere near me until you build up your stamina."

Jake grinned at me, his eyes dancing with mischief. He leapt back on top of me, pushing me back down on the couch as he ravaged my neck once again.

"When we do finally have sex, you'll be getting fifteen minute breaks in between rounds—not fifteen minute rounds," he growled.

I heard myself giggle at what he said, but it just didn't sit right with me. I had explained to Jacob when we first encountered this problem that I didn't believe in sex without love. He had raised an eyebrow and crinkled his nose, but he had agreed and said that he respected my decision. I had gotten hot and heavy like this with other guys before, but just because we made out, never meant that they got any farther. I guess I didn't like him assuming that we were eventually going to have sex. That was just plain cocky.

Speaking of cocky…

"Jake!" I mumbled through his lips.

"I know, I know. I have to go to the stupid airport." He did look really cute when he was pouting, though.

The next day the group all met together at my house as we exchanged presents, but we were not allowed to be opened until Christmas day, as Alice had pointed out. I had point out to her, like every year, that she was Jewish.

"I'm a Christmas Jew!" she crossed her arms. "I believe in one, but I celebrate the other. Do you know how boring some of the Hanukkah songs are?!"

"Hey, that Adam Sandler song is pretty good," Emmett defended.

"Whatever, I still love Christmas and the way it smells," Alice nodded.

Since the first part Hanukkah fell in line with Christmas, Alice was going to spend Christmas with Jasper and his family from Port Angeles and some other family in Texas, then the day after Christmas they were going to fly out to celebrate the last half of Hanukkah with Alice's family. On December 31st they were going to fly back to Seattle so we could all start the new year with each other.

Rosalie's family was going on a cruise to the Bahamas. She told us she wasn't missing much, so she was spending Christmas with Emmett and his parents. Carlisle and Esme were the ones who were putting on the New Year's party that we were all going to.

I had already decided that Edward was going to spend Christmas with Charlie and me in Forks after I saw how well they got along on Thanksgiving. I had forgotten to tell him of my decision, and when everyone was discussing their Christmas plans, I had wondered why he looked so depressed.

He wouldn't flat out tell me what was wrong, but I knew well enough to piece things together and realized that he thought he was spending Christmas alone. Edward just laughed when I told him on my plans, and had said that next time I decide on his life he would like a little heads up.

We all said our goodbyes to Alice and Jasper, and I felt like Seattle got a little bit quieter when she left. The next couple of day Rose, Emmett, Edward, and I all hung around the TV in my living room watching reruns of cartoons that were done in clay.

After the last road trip Edward and I went on, I now knew that we had to pack, and get as ready as possible on Sunday evening, so on Monday morning we would get up and go.

However, once again we were back in a familiar dilemma: which car do we take? Edward accused me of cheating, but I like to say I pulled out the big guns. It had already been decided that whoever drives has to listen to the other person's music. So I threatened on listening to only the Jonas Brothers the whole drive to Forks if he drove. I won.

"You are such a cheater," Edward pouted. He had his arms crossed, his eyebrows pulled together, and he glared out the window.

"Stop being such a baby and put on the music," I brushed off.

Edward reached down to the pockets of his jeans. They were empty, so he began to pat himself down frantically.

"Shit, I think I left them in my other jeans," he sighed.

"So we get to listen to my music then?" This trip was going to turn out even better then I thought.

"No, I packed the jeans in question," he grinned.

"Oh, well I'm not pulling over."

"I wouldn't expect you to," he rolled his eyes as he unbuttoned his seat belt.

The road to Forks was unsurprisingly dead, so I was able to focus a little bit more of my attention on Edward as he crawled to the back seat. He let out a triumphant "ha!" but was immediately silenced when he realized he couldn't reach his suitcase, and needed to crawl into the trunk. At that point I was all out laughing at the image of a grown man trying to maneuver himself so he wouldn't sit on either one of our luggages.

"You know, it's kind of peaceful back here," Edward noted, his head the only thing I could see over the seats. "If you put the seats down, throw some blankets on, I bet this would be a pretty decent sleeping area."

"Emmett already made that discovery," I laughed. "I went to drive around the city to do some errands, and Emmett called me to pick him up for lunch. I had thought that he wanted to go out to lunch with me, but instead he spent his break taking a nap in the back of my car."

Edward laughed. "He would." He was silent as I heard him rummage threw his bag. "Oh!" he gasped. "Looks like I'm not the only one who doesn't have their Ipod with them up front."

"Edward, were you going through my luggage?" I gaped.

"No, I needed floss so I figured it would be on one of the outer pockets, which is where I found this," he dangled my silver Ipod.

"Edward…" I warned.

"What would you do if this 'accidentally' flew out the window?" he smiled an innocent smile, his eyes shimmering in his taunting.

"You put that down right now!" It came out more whining than threatening.

"What, Bella?" Mock shock played on his face. "I would never do something like that."

"Edward, I'm going to come back there and bitch slap you."

"But you're driving."

"I'll pull over."

"You sound like a mom."

"And you sound like a guy who is about to get bitch slapped."

Edward dropped my Ipod and started laughing; crawling back over with his black Ipod in hand. "Geez, Bella, who knew you could be so violent?"

We arrived in the early afternoon since we were actually able to get up early enough to drive. Edward was quiet as I drove through the small town. But his silence and blank expression were something that I understood now. This town must hold a lot of bittersweet memories. The good ones with his parents, the traumatic memories of claiming what little was left of his house. And the memories that I'm sure he once used to cherish of Lauren were now just a reminder of all the time that was wasted.

I felt his pain—although not nearly as severe as his—and I tried to empathize with him.

Right as I pulled into the newly snow plowed driveway in Charlie's little home, Charlie came out with an uncharacteristic broad smile on his face. He came rushing over to the car and opened the trunk before I even stepped out of the car.

"Come on, kids," Charlie lifted my bags, but Edward was there before Charlie to take his too. "It's cold out, and the game is about to start."

"Awww, the true reason as to why you are so eager to great me," I hugged him. "It's not my presence really, just that I arrived right before the game."

"That's not true, Bells," Charlie frowned. "You also cook dinner; you're a valuable kid."

I made a stabbing motion to my chest. "And the hits just keep coming."

Charlie rolled his eyes. We made our way to the foot of the steps where he dumped my bag, not in my room. The game really must be starting soon.

"How are you doing, Masen?" Charlie slapped Edward in the back in a very guy like fashion.

"I'm good, Charlie," Edward smiled, dropping his bags with mine. I guess we'll get to them later. "Thank you so much for inviting me to spend Christmas with you guys, it means a lot."

"It was nothing, really," Charlie laughed. "Nothing goes on here. Bella cooks, I watch whatever is on TV, and she reads. We're not that interesting."

We had just made our way to the living room where a row of pictures of me lining up from kindergarten to graduation were perfectly aligned. Edward saw the pictures and started to grin, "I wouldn't say that."

Shit, I forgot he has never been to this house before.

"Well, as long as you don't mind the couch, then I think we will be fine," Charlie settled himself on the cushions. "What happened to that Jacob boy you're dating?"

"He's visiting family," I answered casually.

"First time he didn't make a scene about leaving," Edward murmured so low, that I knew I wasn't meant to hear. I still frowned.

Charlie turned on the TV, clearly dismissing us. "If you don't mind me…"

I rolled my eyes this time. "Don't worry, Edward and I will be out of your hair. I probably need to go pick up groceries."

I turned back to the staircase, now very aware of how Edward was taking in every detail of the house. Although I had only been to Edward's house once back in high school, and it wasn't the best of memories; I still remembered it being really nice—nothing like my little Forks home.

Edward ignored my protests and grabbed all of our bags, following me up the stairs. I showed him where Charlie's room was, were the only bathroom in this place was, and I couldn't help but pause at my door.

"What's wrong?" Edward asked, closer then I had thought he was and making me hesitate even more so.

"It's stupid," I laughed nervously. When Edward just raised an eyebrow, I sighed and explained. "Well, whenever I'm here in this house, I feel like I'm in high school again, and well… Edward Masen is about to go into my room."

Edward didn't spare my feelings and started to laugh. I blushed with embarrassment and anger.

"Shut up," I demanded. "It's just weird, okay?"

Edward calmed himself. "Bella, we have been living with each other for the past half year. I have seen you drunk, hung over, clean, dirty, sick, healthy, fully clothed, and even barely clothed. None of that fazed you in the slightest, and yet I am just here to drop off your bags, and you feel nervous?"

"Shut up," I repeated.

Edward laughed, and wrapped an arm around me, pulling me into a half hug. "I'm sorry, it's just odd."

"Well, no one ever said I was normal," I retorted.

Edward smirked his infamous crooked grin, "No one indeed."

Opening the door, I couldn't help but blush with embarrassment. My room was small, very small, and it humbled me every time I walked in. I certainly was not poor, but money was always scarce and it truly taught me the value of a penny. The large apartment, the expensive purchases, and the very large bank account were all blessings for me. And I was thankful every day for them.

I was never embarrassed of my modest beginnings, but as Edward walked into the room, his presence taking up most of the space, I felt very self-conscious.

My bed was lined up to the center of the wall, and it still had the purple comforter that Charlie had bought for me when I first arrived. There was a small night stand at the side of the bed with a matching purple lamp. Across the bed was an equally small work desk where I had posted pictures of my time here in Forks, and even some going into college. An old computer had once sat there, but I had long since trashed it and had the house installed with wireless internet, and had bought Charlie his own laptop—which he seldom uses... go figure.

In the corner of the room was the old wooden rocking chair, still in the exact same place where it had been from the moment when my dad placed it there when I was born. There weren't many things in this room other than the pictures that I wanted. The rocking chair was one of the things that I wanted to take with me. Charlie had insisted on me taking it when I had moved out of the dorms in college, and even more so when I moved in the large apartment I am in now, but it never felt right to me. I knew that I did not want to live in that apartment forever. If I were to find the right guy that I wanted to marry, settle down with, and have kids, then I will take this chair with me. Until then, it would remain in its little home in Forks.

"I like it." Edward had been quietly observing the room. "It's interesting; I had always wondered what your room looked like when we were in high school."

That perked my interest. "Really? You mean you imagined me in my room?" I faked a gasp. "Edward that's kind of creepy."

He rolled his eyes at me. "Are you telling me that you never imagined what my room looked like back in high school?"

I thought for a second. "Yeah, I guess I did. A room tells a lot about a person."

"And yours is speaking loud and clear," Edward grinned.

I let out a nervous laugh. "So, what does my room tell you about me?"

Edward looked over at the comforter on the bed, "You told me you like purple, but not all over the place. So that tells me that someone, probably Charlie, had gotten it for you." He walked over to the pictures. The majority of the pictures were of Angela and Ben, I wasn't a fan of pasting pictures of myself all over the place. Edward reached up and traced a picture of me and Angela.

It had been of us back in college during finals week. Ben and Angela were not going out yet, but he was part of our little group. Angela and I were sharing a cramped coffee table to do our studying, both of our hair loosely pinned to the top of our heads; most of my hair had already come undone. We were both wearing our most baggy, yet relaxing pants and a giant sweatshirt. Ben had snuck up on us, carrying a large mirror. When he finally coaxed us to look away from our studying, Angela and I saw our reflections and busted into laugher. Partly because we looked so stupid, but also from part hysteria from not getting any sleep. Angela and I fell onto each other in a mass of giggles. Ben grabbed his camera and managed to capture a really good picture of our hysterics.

That picture always made me smile.

"This tells me that you were happy," Edward had a small sad smile. He backed away from the picture, and then walked over to the rocking chair, sat down and started rocking. "And this tells me that even you, the notorious spinster, still want a family."

"Everyone wants a family," I agreed softly as I sat on my bed.

We were quiet for a few minuets, both lost in our own thoughts. Edward was the one to break the peaceful silence. "So what is on the agenda? Are we really going grocery shopping?"

I sat up and started to stretch. "That would be a yes."

I popped my head back into the living room to make sure that Charlie was doing alright. He brushed me off saying that he was fine, and that he wanted steak tonight.

I pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store, and unbuckled my seat belt. I noticed Edward hesitate and eye the small store as if he was about to face the dentist.

"What's up?" I asked.

Edward took a big breath. "The last time I was here in Forks was a year and a half ago, when I helped Lauren's parents move out. They're in Colorado now, but the last time everyone saw me, they thought I was going to marry Lauren."

"Oh," I paused. "So you think that they don't know that you guys broke up?"

"I wish," he snorted. Edward rolled he head to face me. "Come on, Bella, a small town like this? They all probably heard Lauren's version which is most likely going to sound like we got into an argument, and I left her in her misery."

I bit my lip, he was right. People in this town were particularly nosy.

"Well, I have some good news," I offered. Edward looked at me to continue. "They all love me, I'm the local celebrity. So you're cool by association with me."

Edward laughed, his mood dissolving. "Oh, how the times have changed."

"I'll pretend I didn't heat that."

We quickly made our way through the parking lot, trying to not get soaked with the rain. The doors opened and a wave of warm air met us with bright florescent lights, and the light sound of Christmas music in the background to go along with the very cheap looking holiday decorations.

I grabbed a cart and threw my bag in so I could rummage out the list I had made.

"Okay, so really the most important section I need to hit is the meat second," I thought out loud as I started to push my cart, not really paying attention to where I was going. "I probably should get some more beer, you can get whatever kind of drinks you want... and I really should get some vegetables, I know Charlie is not a big fan, but he is looking a little thick…Edward?"

I glanced up and almost jumped back. For the second time today Edward was much closer then I had originally thought. Only this time his eyes were darting all throughout the store with a paranoid expression on his face. He was leaning closer to me as if he was trying to hide.

"Edward?" I asked again.

"They are all staring at me," he hissed below his breath.

I looked around, ready to just brush him off and tell him that he was over reacting and that no one was looking at us, only everyone was looking at us. Well, just him really.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"You think this is funny?" Edward glared at me.

"There are some aspects of comedy here, yes."

"Maybe I should just go to the car and wait there until you're done," Edward shifted uncomfortably.

I stopped the cart and turned to look at him with one hand on my hip. "You are not going to hide out in the car just because you are afraid of a few stares. I had to put up with more then just a few stares in high school after the party." Edward flinched at my words. My voice softened, "I didn't say that to be mean, just that… well, you are a lot stronger than me, Edward, and if I can do it, you can do it."

Edward stared at me, his emerald eyes piercing me with unspoken words. Words that I couldn't piece together, but I could only speculation the meaning. He finally shook his head and started to walk. "I could never be as strong as you," he sighed to himself.

I eased the conversation to much lighter topics, and soon the obvious gawking was forgotten.

Edward was taking full advantage of my cooking skills. What was once going to be a small Christmas meal between the three of us, was soon rivaling Thanksgiving. Charlie was only going to be too happy to have these additions to the meal, and I wasn't complaining because I knew that whatever was left over was going to stay with Charlie. I would freeze a few of the leftovers so that it would last him a couple weeks. I know Charlie was a grown man, but I still felt guilty for not being there to make him dinner.

"Oh! How about a casserole?" Edward looked at me, his green eyes sparkling with childlike hope.

"Edward you are already having me cook a green bean casserole," I laughed. "How many casseroles do you want?"

"This is different," he defended. "This would be a chicken and mushroom casserole."

I laughed again. "You act like I never cook at home."

"This is different," he repeated with a pout.

Oh God, when he pouted like that and looked at me those pleading eyes, there was no hope for me standing my ground.

"Fine you can get your second casserole." We had just turned the corner when I literally crashed out cart into someone else's.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," I gasped. I looked up to see who I had collided with and a friendly smile slipped on my face. "Mrs. Hutchinson, I'm sorry, I didn't see you."

Mrs. Hutchinson's beamed at me, "Oh, Bella dear, come here and give me a hug."

I left the cart with Edward and walked over to her. She must have been in her seventies now, and had converted over to the realm of woman with what I called granny-froes. She was a few inches shorter then me, and was decked out in the Christmas apparel that the senior citizens community seemed to love to wear.

She had been my English teacher back in my junior year in high school and she always took credit for "teaching me everything I knew," even if she was just me teacher for one semester. Though it has been years since I was her student, I always felt uncomfortable hugging a teacher.

"How are you doing?" she leaned back, but still kept her hand on my arm.

"Well, I'm just about to get my next book published," even if I had a loyal following of readers, I still always became nauseous when the time comes near.

"That is wonderful," she smiled. Mrs. H leaned to the side and saw Edward standing by the cart. "Mr. Mason, is that you?"

I noticed how the tone to her voice lost some of it's warmth. Another warning sign was that she called Edward "Mr. Mason"; she only calls people by their last name if she doesn't like them.

I decided to step in before Edward overreacted. "Mrs. Hutchinson, you remember Edward then?" I emphasized his name. "He was in the same English class as me."

She nodded her head and narrowed her eyes. "Yes, but I didn't think the two of you were friends."

Edward looked over at me; I had never seen him so uncomfortable. "We weren't that close in high school, but a mutual friend reintroduced us a few months back and we really hit it off as friends." That seemed like a pretty good edit, she didn't need to know any details.

"Well, I should hope that you are only friends," she scoffed. "Although I would wish that you weren't even that. Do you know what he had been up to before the two of you reconnected?"

My mouth had dropped from shock; my mind was still trying to process what she had just said, that I almost missed her question.

"I… I… yes, I know what he was up to," I looked over at Edward who seemed just as shocked as me. "He was an accountant."

"That is not what I meant," Mrs. H glared at Edward. "He broke that poor Lauren Mallory girl's heart. He cheated on her you know, and then completely abandoned her to fend for herself on the bills and debt that he left behind."

If I thought I was shocked before, it was nothing to how I felt now. However she must have misinterpreted my shock.

Mrs. H had a smug smile on her face as she looked between us.

"Come on, Bella, let's go." I felt Edward's hand under my elbow and he tugged me away.

I yanked my arm back. "No," I snapped. Mrs. H's smile grew. I walked up to her, anger rolling off of me so strongly that I'm sure she could feel it. "You know what; Lauren Mallory is a selfish little bitch."

Mrs. H's smile vanished; I had always spoken to her with the utmost respect; needless to say, I never cursed in front of her.

I kept going. "She is a lying, cheating, skanky ass bitch. She was the one who cheated. And I know that because I saw it. I expected you to be better than to believe whatever bull crap lie you heard. So, how about you go to your friends and tell them the truth: she was the one who cheated. Edward did not leave any bills or debt behind. He is going to be the best thing that ever happened to the music world because he got signed. And we are friends, so if I hear anyone else badmouthing him, they'll get this little lecture too."

I stepped back, more then a little surprised from my outburst. "Well, I will not hold this against you this time. I'll see you around. Good-bye."

I walked back to Edward with the cart and walked as quickly as possible as I could to the check out counter.

I could feel Edward's stare on me as I got in line for checking out.

I let out a sigh and looked at Edward, "I always hated kissing her ass."

"I'll say…" he laughed.

As I cooked dinner that night Edward replayed what happened at the grocery store to Charlie. A few weeks after my birthday Charlie had called me and asked for the details on Edward's situation, I had figured it was because he was too embarrassed to ask me at my birthday, but I now realized that he too must have heard the rumors as well.

"That old bat needs to keep her mouth shut," Charlie nodded.

"Well, she definitely will be after Bella took her down like that," Edward grinned at me. "And according to Bella, if she hears anyone trashing my good reputation, she will be there on a white horse, and shining armor to defend my honor."

"Wow, Edward," I turned from the stove to face him. "I am seriously considering killing you right now."

"No way," Edward brushed away my comment. "I've got Chief Swan at my side. You can't kill me in front of him."

"No, but you both have to go to sleep sometime," I mumbled to myself.

"Now Bella, there will be no murder under my roof," Charlie looked at me sternly. "But as long as it's outside and you hide the evidence so I can't trace it back to you, then you will be fine."

I laughed. Charlie didn't make jokes often but when he did they were even funnier because of how lame they were.

"What is up with this family and violence?" Edward slouched down in his chair as if he were hiding.

We all laughed a bit more while I passed out dinner. Conversation was produced more from me and Edward, but I could tell that Charlie was enjoying himself.

Once dinner and dessert were finished, Charlie leaned back in his chair and let out a sigh.

"That is why I miss you Bells," he patted his stomach. "You always were a mean cook."

I rolled my eyes.

"But I do need to tell you something," Charlie sat up straighter, looking a bit more serious. "I forgot to tell you, but the station is hosting the town's Christmas party this year, and since I'm the Chief, the Chief's daughter needs to be there as well."

"Awe, Dad!" I complained, feeling like I was a teenager again. "I don't really need to be there..."

"So you want to miss Christmas Eve with your dear old dad?"

Ugh, I hated when he pulled the guilt card.

Every year some place would host the town's Christmas party on Christmas Eve. It wasn't the official party, but since the town was so small, that is basically what it turned out to be.

"After today it's not like anyone is going to go anywhere near you," added Edward.

I threw him a death glare causing him to duck his head.

"Fine," I sighed. "You're lucky I brought a nice dress with me just in case."

The next morning I walked down stairs to fined Edward sitting at the kitchen table with half way eaten scramble eggs and the local newspaper laid out on the table in front of him.

He looked up at me and smiled; I swear, I could practically see rays coming off of him when he smiled like that.

"Good morning," he pushed over the coffee pot to me. "Your dad left about a half hour ago, he said he was going to work today and that he would be back in time for dinner."

"That's cool," I plopped myself down on the chair and poured myself a cup of much needed coffee. "So have any idea of what you want to do today?"

I had expected him to make some comment about hanging around, or maybe even driving over to La Push, but instead he frowned and looked down.

"Wow, that must be something big," I leaned closer to him. "What's up?"

Edward sighed and looked at me. I had only seen his eyes this dark before once; when he had just left Lauren, but even then they held anger. Now… now they were so dark with sadness that I had to look away.

"I feel horrible for asking you this… only it's just been so long." He looked down again.

"Edward what is it?" I reach out for his hand. He grabbed mine and squeezed. Not to reassure me he was fine, but he held on to my hand as if it was the only thing holding him together.

"I just want to go to where my house used to be… where they died."

It didn't take long before we were both ready to head out. We were both quiet on the drive to where his house once stood. I was trying not to be so selfish and dwell on my emotions by thinking that the last time I drove up this road was the night of the party. I needed to not think about that though. Who knows when the last time Edward had been here was, and what he had seen when he was here?

It was also really hard not to look over at him every five seconds, hoping that he was alright.

He didn't look like he was going to break down or anything, and he didn't look angry—instead he just looked lifeless. As if he had disconnected himself from his mind.

I knew Edward wouldn't want me to ask him if he was okay; it must have been hard enough for him to even ask me to drive him here in the first place.

The road was just as how I remembered it, only now it was light out, and there was snow on either side of the road. There were cracks in the concrete where roots of plants had broken through. I guessed that if his parents were living then they would have kept this road up to par, but there was no one to do that now.

I was making the final turn on the road and half expected the large mansion hidden behind the trees. I couldn't hold back a gasp when I saw the large clearing where the house should have been. The grass leading up to it was over grown, and the road ended where the garage should have been.

The shrubbery from the land had not grown back, but only a few patches of grass here or there. I wasn't worried of having any flashbacks to the night of the party; there was nothing left here to remind me of that night.

I stopped the car a few yards away from the end, and got out first. I didn't look at Edward, but I knew he probably needed a few seconds to get himself together.

The day was one of those rare sunny days—probably just to mock us—but it didn't help with warming up the day at all. I had on my dark navy blue snow jacket, with a dark forest green scarf and matching gloves. I had earlier joked with Edward that we were semi matching. He had on a dark forest green jacket, only a black scarf and gloves for him.

I heard the car door slam so I looked over to see Edward stepping out. He smiled, trying to reassure me, but it didn't reach his eyes.

I followed his lead, making sure I stood a few steps back.

Edward walked up to where the entrance might had been, then stopped. He looked up as if searching for where his room, or where his parents bedroom were. We stood for a very long time. I was getting uncomfortable, but I didn't dare move, I wouldn't want Edward to head home early just because I can't stand still in one place long enough.

After a solid ten minutes, Edward finally sighed and took a few steps back. He looked back at me and gave me another empty smile. I would have almost preferred it if he would have just let the pain show on his face. He didn't say anything, but just nodded his head in a gesture to tell me to follow him.

We walked side by side in silence, across his lawn and farther into the trees. I had no idea where we were going, but I trusted Edward not to get us lost. Besides, he walked with a purpose so I knew we were probably going to a specific area.

About twenty minutes into the walk I could hear running water, and sure enough once we made it into the clearing there was a small river making its way downstream.

Edward walked up to a large bolder and sat down, I followed his lead.

Once I was settled, Edward let out a sigh. "My parents left me money you know," Edward finally said.

I didn't say anything, just let him continue.

"A lot of money actually. You've seen the house once before, we were very well off."

That was odd, when I had taken him in I was under the impression that his funds were very limited.

Edward must have read my mind because he explained. "I probably could… _should_ have used that money when I left Portland, but it's not my money, not really. I couldn't spend my parent's money because I was stuck at a dead end job and didn't have a proper savings."

Edward ran his hands through his hair. "When my parents died, and I received their money, I always told myself that I wouldn't touch it, not until I get married and start a family. Then I would be able to build the house where I wanted to live, and even be able to start out with a hefty amount for my kids college tuition."

He shook his head and looked back at me; his fake smile looked painful. "I own this land too. My parent's property goes out a few more acres past this river. I don't think I would like to live in Forks permanently again, but I would love to rebuild a smaller place here so whenever I wanted to visit I had a place. No one knew about this; well, Jasper did, but I never told Lauren."

Crap. How do you respond to that?

"Sorry I brought you up here," Edward broke the silence first. "I shouldn't have shown you all this, I know it's a major mood kill-"

"Don't be sorry," I cut him off. "I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to confide in me. And sure, it's not the most uplifting story I've heard, but it's the truth and it's what you are going through and needed to be vocalized."

Edward smiled, and for the first time all day it reached his eyes.

After helping Edward pick some wild flowers and laying them where I think was the entrance of the house, we drove out to La Push to go walk around the beach. Edward was back to laughing and teasing me; it almost seemed like that morning never happened. He didn't mention it again, and there wasn't any need for me to bring it up.

I made dinner again for Charlie and Edward. It was another peaceful evening, and I welcomed it entirely.

The next day was Christmas Eve, and I was mildly freaking out about going to the town's party. It was a combination of not wanting to hear what they were going to say to be me, or rather behind my back, about how I told off Mrs. H, and as complimenting as it was, people would always come up to me and ask the same questions over and over again about my books. As for the people who neither praised me nor badmouthed me behind my back, there was always a select few who did approach me and felt the need to "put me in my place" as they had said. They thought that since I was a big shot writer they needed to point out the flaws in my look. Those who did use this method of approach with me were harmless. They would say a few nasty things here or there, but in the end I would leave to Seattle to my penthouse. So boo yah.

I was hoping that the day would go by slowly, but time decided to wage war with me, speeding up so that the day went by as quickly as I was dreading.

I was throwing a mini temper tantrum as I got ready for the nights festivities. I kept complaining about the lighting, or how the guys both used all the hot water. However my temper tantrum always ended up with me apologizing after each outburst. Charlie decided to give up on cheering me up and decided to go see what was on TV.

Edward had stuck around while I blow dried my hair which was not going the way I wanted. He had jokingly made a mild comment about me resembling a drowned rat. So I threw my brush him. Edward insisted that he said "a round hat" but that didn't make the situation any better. Yeah, he decided to go hang out with Charlie.

Even with my foul mood, I must admit that I did a really good job cleaning myself up. I had on a burgundy velvet dress that went down to my knees, and with off-the-shoulder straps. The neckline was revealing, maybe a little bit too much so, but I was still in the rang of classy so it was okay.

I had on thick black tights on to keep me somewhat warm, and a matching burgundy red heels that I was really lucky to find one day. Of course with this weather I had a heavy long black coat, but I would ditch that the moment I went through the doors. No need to hide the effort I put in tonight.

I walked downstairs and both Charlie and Edward looked up at me. Edward was used to seeing me in revealing outfits, but he still looked surprised when he saw me. Maybe the neck line was a little much.

Edward was wearing a nice dark midnight blue button up shirt, with a burgundy silk tie. He had on a nice pair of just tight enough black slacks. He was looking good. Charlie was wearing a coal gray button up shirt that I bought him last year, with black slacks. Charlie looked slick, and when he smiled I could see why Renee ran away with him.

Charlie didn't say anything, but I could tell he was uncomfortable. He declared it was time to leave, and that we were taking the cruiser. Not my favorite mode of transportation, but I was feeling bad for making such a fuss earlier that I didn't complain.

Edward was offering me the front seat, but Charlie spoke up. "Edward, up front."

"No, it's alright Charlie," started Edward, but shut up when he saw Charlie's face.

I had never sat in the back seat of the cruiser, or any cruiser for that matter, and I didn't like it. The metal divider made me feel like a criminal.

"Why do I have to sit back here?" I asked feeling slightly more panicked when I saw that the back doors didn't have locks.

"For wearing that," huffed Charlie.

"You are so passive," I rolled my eyes.

The ride took all but five minutes to get us to the town hall. There were a lot more people there than I had expected, which didn't help for my nerves.

"Why are you so nervous?" Edward walked up beside me and placed his hand on my lower back so he could guide us. Charlie had already walked ahead of us and saw one of his friends.

"What makes you think I'm nervous?" I countered, although my voice gave me away.

Edward chuckled. "Let's just say that I know you."

I let out a frustrated breath. "Remember how I said that my room makes me feel like I'm a teenager again?" He nodded. "Well, this makes me feel like an irresponsible teenager."

"How so?"

"With these people, I feel like they are asking me a double question. Like when they say 'how is your book doing?' I know that they really want to know how much I'm making. Or when they ask me, 'Oh, haven't found that Mr. Right to settle down with?' that is actually their way of saying, 'you better hurry up and have kids because your ovaries are shriveling up like raisins!"

Edward shook his head with a grimace. "I really didn't need that visual."

I glared at him.

"Alright, alright," Edward laughed. "But I'm telling you no one is going near you after you told off Mrs. H, and if you stick with me people are going to stay away from your raisins."

I laughed and playfully smacked his chest. "Don't call them that, it sounds like you are talking about my boobs."

"Trust me, no one would think that I'm talking about your boobs," Edward's voice got lower, and had a slight huskier tone.

"Okay, I really don't want to keep talking about my body parts."

Edward kept his arm around my waist, for which I was grateful. He gave me that extra support.

There were faces that I recognized everywhere. I had forgotten most of their names, but it felt like they all knew me and my life story. And by the look on their faces, were judging me, too. So naturally I made a beeline to the sad little bar they had. I passed up a sea of people in either bright red or bright green. It looked like Santa Clause threw up in here. I glanced down; my dress was not helping the cause.

I ordered a rum and coke and began to nurse it immediately. Edward ordered something with gin, and we both stood off to the side and watched people watch us.

"Is it just me, or are you feeling really creepy just standing off to the side like this?" I asked Edward.

"I definitely think we are putting out the creeper vibe," Edward nodded. We had already both finished our drinks and it was too soon before ordering more. "We could go around and mingle. Where is your dad?"

I looked around and saw Charlie off to the side with a group of his friends. "Oh, my God, Charlie is being more social then us; that is just plain pathetic."

"Well, mingling it is." Edward placed his arm around my waist and lead me off to where a group of men were. I instantly recognized some of them who worked with Charlie at the station.

"Awe, Bella!" one of the men called out. I think his name was Hank or something.

"Hi," I responded with a large smile, best to avoid names. "How are you doing?"

"I'm good, I'm good. Come here and give me a hug," he opened arms wide for me. I could smell the alcohol before I was even near him. "You are just so damn pretty!"

"Thank you," I blushed—he wasn't letting me go.

"Man, if I was just a few years younger… or if you were just a few drinks drunker," Hank and his friends erupted into laugher as they all nodded their head in agreement.

I looked at Edward, and was pleased to see that he didn't look too amused by this situation.

Edward reached out for my hand and pulled me to him; he smelt much better then Hank.

"I'm sorry, but it seems like I am the right age, and intoxication level for her," Edward's smooth velvet voice called out. He tucked me under his arm and I knew where he was going with this so I didn't fight it.

"You two together? Swan and Mason?" Hank scratched his head. "I thought you were with that Mallory girl." He must not have been caught up to speed on local gossip.

"No, Lauren and I broke up a while ago," Edward burrowed his face in my hair. "But as to what Bella and I are up to, well…"

I let out a very girlish, very unlike me giggle. "Edward," I placed my hand on his chest. "You're leading them on, and they might jump to conclusions."

Edward grabbed the hand on his chest and looked right into my eyes. His eyes were dark again, but this time not with anger, or sadness, but with another emotion. If I wasn't so captivated I would have looked away.

"Let them assume," his voice sent chills down my spine. "It might not be that far off to what they're thinking."

I was left speechless, just like Hank and the other men. Edward used that time to guide me away from the group of drunken middle aged men.

Edward lead me to another corner of the large room. I was still gawking at him that when we finally managed our way through the crowd and parked ourselves on the other side of the bar.

"What?" Edward laughed.

"Nothing," I shrugged. "I just didn't think that you would use that method of escape."

Edward smirked. "Well, it looked like you were going along with it just fine. Alright, no more mingling. It's too dangerous to have you around old drunk men."

"Eww, it is so disturbing know that those old men were fantasizing about being with me," I shook my head.

"It must be your raisin-like ovaries."

I fell into hysterics, "I thought that visual disturbed you?"

"It does, but it's fun to say."

We were joking around and were starting to get into the party mood. I was just finishing my second drink, while Edward started his third. As long as I ignored the tacky music, or the high pitched laughter, this party was pretty tolerable.

Edward was in the middle of telling me a joke when a woman in her mid thirties started to squeal when she saw us.

"Oh! You two are under the mistletoe, you have to kiss!" she yelled before she stumbled away.

Edward and I both started to laugh, but not our normal carefree laughter; this was more reserved, and unsure.

I looked up, and sure enough there was a mistletoe with a red ribbon tied right above us.

It might have been the alcohol, or the Christmas spirit, or maybe sheer curiosity, but I looked up at Edward and raised one eyebrow. "Well, it is Christmas."

"Tis the season," shrugged Edward.

We both placed our drinks on table right to our side then looked up at each other awkwardly. Edward cupped my face with his hand, and brushed his thumb over the apple of my cheeks. I had held his hand before, or even played with them when we would do thumb-a-wars, but suddenly I felt like the contact with his hand was a lot heavier then normal. I could feel my cheeks burn, and with the contact I'm sure Edward could, too.

I felt like an idiot and didn't know what to do with myself. With slow and slightly shaking hands, I placed them on his arms, right over his biceps. A secret part of me relished in the fact that I could now touch his muscles.

Edward looked at me while he leaned down closer to my face. My lips were slightly parted and my heart beat out of control. When finally we were just inches apart he paused and looked over my face, breathing it in. I could feel his breath tickle my skin, and I became very aware with how close our bodies were.

Finally Edward closed his eyes and closed the gap. My eyes shut at the feel of his lips on mine. I had expected more force, but was shocked at how gentle his lips were. They were soft too, yet still firm and was in control, and he still didn't push me.

We moved together in perfect rhythm, and although we broke away just a few short moments later, I was out of breath.

I looked up at Edward whose breathing had become ragged as well. We stared at each other for no more than five second before our lips were back together, this time with more urgency.

I felt his tongue gently lick my lips, asking for permission. I opened my mouth and granted him access while we both fought for dominance.

My hands at this point had snuck into his hair, while his other arm pulled me closer to him.

Before it could be considered a make out session we both broke away; panting as if we had just ran the Hundred K.

I looked up at Edward, not sure what had just happened. He looked back down at me with the same confused, hesitant expression.

The same thirty something woman from earlier came back around, "You guys both have one hell of a Christmas spirit." She barked out laughter then turned away.

We were both ill at ease for the rest of the night. Neither one of us wanted to look into the other's eyes. And once we got home I darted straight up to my room before I could embarrass myself anymore.

I had basically attacked Edward at the party; he probably thought I was some kind of freak.

God, what was I thinking? It was Edward, the same Edward who in the past few days has been struggling with the lies Lauren told, and had finally opened up to me about his parents, and I have to go out there and kiss him because I couldn't hold my liquor.

I took complete advantage of him. I knew that I had been looking at him at Edward the man, and not Edward my friend for the past couple of weeks, yet I couldn't keep it in, I had to act on it.

And he hadn't even been interested in any other girls since Lauren, which meant he was still recovering.

Oh, no… He had told me Lauren was the only other girl he had ever kissed. And knowing Edward, he was not the type to go around kissing just to kiss; that kind of stuff meant something to him. And I took advantage of that.

Shit, shit, mother fucking shit!

If it weren't one in the morning in a house with two other people (one of them being Edward) I would have been screaming out my frustration.

I threw myself on my bed, not sure if I wanted to cry, if I wanted to literally punch myself, or if I wanted to relive that kiss over and over in my head.

I woke up early Christmas morning, never really have gone to sleep. But I decided that the best method for handling last night's mishap was to act like nothing ever happen, and be Edward's absolutely platonic friend.

I woke up Edward first when I attacked the kitchen to make breakfast. He walked over to me with a weary smile, but I just gave him the best "hey pal" smile that I could muster.

I started to ramble on about how ridiculous some people looked last night, and how Alice would have a mild heart attack if she ever saw them.

Edward picked up on what I was doing and immediately started to follow along. At first the conversation was a little strained, and it was obvious we were both forcing ourselves to talk, but soon enough we started talking like how we normally did and all was forgotten.

Charlie came down right as breakfast was ready, and we all chattered about the new coat of snow outside this morning. After breakfast we made our way to the small little Christmas tree that Charlie had up and began opening our presents.

Emmett, Rosalie, Alice and Jasper each pitched in to give Charlie a new set of fishing gear. I had never seen Charlie so upset.

"Bella, you tell them to take this back," Charlie frowned. "This is too expensive and they shouldn't have gotten me a present in the first place."

"Now, I know where Bella gets it from," Edward murmured.

I rolled my eyes. "Dad, if I tell them you don't want it you're going to hurt their feelings. Do you want to hurt Alice's feelings?"

It was a cheap card to play, but I had to. Alice had Charlie wrapped around her little finger.

Charlie was out of words and set his new fishing rod down. "Well… for Alice."

Rose and Emmett had given Edward a car cleaning kit, which I thought was lame but Edward seemed really excited. He told me that it was a really nice kit, and was to detail his car with blah, blah, blah.

I really don't like to talk car.

I got a new really expensive camera from Emmett and Rose; which both pissed me off because of how much they spent, and also made me really happy. My last camera broke a few months ago in a very tragic accident. I sat on it.

Alice and Jasper gave Edward the latest Ipod with a ridiculous amount of music space. Edward could fit thousands of song on there along with a library's worth of movies. Considering that Edward's current Ipod only held 500 songs, and with his constant bitching about it, this was a very good buy.

From Alice and Jasper I received two tickets for the Phantom of the Opera, which would be coming in the summer. Again I had a mixed feeling of anger for the expensive gift, and loving it at the same time.

Charlie gave Edward a basic tool box, "Every man should know how to fix things up around the house."

Edward was very gracious for the gift, and Charlie looked pleased with himself.

Charlie gave me a wooden bracelet that had a carving of a pencil hold the sides together. I normally don't care for any type of jewelry, but this little bracelet was perfect. I jumped up and gave Charlie a big hug, while his face turned bright red.

"I'm glad you like it, kid," he smiled.

Edward got Charlie a few books on different techniques on how to cast a line when fishing; and other types of fishing knowledge. Charlie became lost in his books seeing as the only two presents left were from both Edward and I to give to each other.

"Here, you first," I thrust my present to him.

Edward looked at me with his crooked grin then commenced to shred the wrapping paper. I held my breath as Edward lifted and examined his present.

I had gotten him a new book to write his compositions in. It was a large leather bounded book that had clean, crisp, thick paper with empty lines. On the front of the book had his named ingrained in gold. It was simple, but still elegant.

"Do you like it?" I asked as he still inspected.

"Bella, this is beautiful," he breathed. "Thank you so much, but you shouldn't have spent so much money on me."

"Yeah, well you know how it feels now," I smirked.

Edward grinned right back, "And now you know how good it feels to give someone you care about a gift that might have been a tad bit on the pricey side."

"Touché."

Edward carefully sat his present aside and handed me mine. I frowned, "Edward that looks a lot like a jewelry box."

He shrugged, "Possibly."

"Edward," I warned. "That looks like a really large jewelry box, the kind that you get from Tiffany's and get a necklace/bracelet combo."

"Don't you want to see what is on the inside?" he asked with innocent eyes.

I opened the wrapping, and sure enough there was a large black velvet box that had Tiffany's CO. written on the outside of it.

"If this is what it is," I started to open the box. "I will not only kill you, but I will also…"

My words faded. There was no jewelry, instead a CD.

"What the-?" I faded out.

Edward reached out behind him and pulled out an old school portable CD player that everyone used to have before Ipods.

I placed the CD in and pushed play. A piano started to play a melody I recognized. They were Edward's songs, all of the ones that I had pointed out to him which were my favorite. The mysterious song that I heard wasn't on here, but all of the ones about me, and a few others of my favorites were there.

I pushed stop and took the headphones off. "Edward," I gasped.

"So… do you like it?" he shifted in his seat. "I don't want to be presumptuous about you wanting my music for Christmas, but you always complain when people spend money on you, so I figured…"

I shook my head. "Edward, this is the most perfect present ever."

He smiled and went back to looking at the book I gave him, while I pushed play and listened to the songs he wrote for me.

We spent the rest of the day lounging and watching movies. I made us a very large dinner, and was pleased to see how many leftovers there were. Charlie would be set.

The next day was when Edward and I were going to drive back to Seattle. We had said our goodbyes to Charlie last night since Edward and I wanted to sleep in and Charlie had to be back at work bright and early.

It was another bright and sunny day, and there was a new thick layer of snow outside. We were loading our bags into the car when a thought accrued to me.

"There isn't any special need to be back home early is there?" I asked Edward with as innocent of a voice that I could muster.

Edward raised one eyebrow. "No… why?"

"Because this!" I had already bunched up some snow, and was hiding it behind my back. I threw it as hard as I could, and it hit Edward right in the forehead.

My hands flew to my mouth as I tried to suppress a giggle.

"Alright, you totally just started World War III." Edward dove to my front lawn where he scooped up some snow and ran off to hide behind a tree.

I also ran behind a tree, laughing as I started to form as many snow balls as I could for ammo.

"How can it be World War III if it's just two countries?" I yelled from my hiding spot.

I didn't hear him say anything, so I kept taunting him. "Not so smart there are we? You know you really shouldn't say things that will make you sound stupid, right Eddie?"

"And you shouldn't call me Eddie," Edward's voice came up from right behind me. I barely had enough time to turn around before he smashed the snow on my head.

"Cheater!" I cried out before I threw myself to my snow ball pile and started to chuck them at him. "You snuck up on me!"

"You don't pay attention," Edward laughed as he threw snow balls right back at me.

We went back and forth like that for a while until someone decide that the best way to make sure the other person get hit by a snow ball, is if you personally deliver it.

So soon enough we ended up rolling around in the snow, while I screamed "eat it" and tried to shove snow up Edward's nose.

"My nose is going to get frostbite, and it's going to fall off and I'm going to look like Michael Jackson!" Edward shouted as he shook his head back and forth.

We ended up in a mass of giggles, not quite being able to breathe partly from our laughter, and party because of cold air.

I was lying on his stomach, still giggling, when I heard my name get called out.

"Bella?"

I looked up and saw a very confused, and slightly annoyed Jacob standing a few yards from us.

"Jacob?" I blinked. The first thing that my mind processed was how cozy Edward and I looked in the snow, so I jumped off of him. The second thing was that I didn't understand was why Jacob was there.

"Jacob, why are you here?"

Jacob glared at Edward who was behind me, then brought his stare back to me. "I wanted to surprise you by coming home early."

"That's not what I meant," I crossed my arms. "What are you doing in Forks?"

I had told him my plans of visiting Charlie and taking Edward with me; he didn't seem too thrilled with idea, but he was excited for me none the less.

"I thought I could meet your dad," he shrugged as if it was no big deal.

Anger swelled up in me. I had told Jacob, and continued to explain to him, why I didn't want him to meet Charlie. But he just couldn't get it. We argued about it a few times, but he had said that he would respect my decision and wouldn't push it. Showing up on his door step seemed to be fucking pushing it.

Before I could yell at him, Edward cut me off.

"God, can't you get a fucking clue?" Edward stormed up next to me. "She doesn't want you to meet her dad! How much on an idiot can you be?"

"Edward!" I looked at him with shock. "Look, I've got this. This isn't any of your concern, so can you please just go wait for me in the house?"

"What do you mean you've got this?" scoffed Edward. "This is the second time he's acted out like this and this is a little much."

"There must be some kind of reason why he showed up out of the blue," my voice got louder and I threw my hands in the air.

"He just said he was here to see your dad, right after you told him not to," Edward raised his voice as well. "That seems pretty clear to me."

"I'm sorry," I yelled sarcastically. "But I'm willing to not be such an asshole and hear his side of the story."

"His side of the story?" Edward let out a bitter laugh. "And when are you going to do that?" Edward sneered. "When you get back home in three hours, he is going to come up with some bullshit story by then!"

"No," I shoved my hand in my pocket and dug out my keys. I threw them at Edward, and he caught them with ease. "I'll drive back with Jacob; you can drive up by yourself."

"You are going to ditch me to go drive back with that dumb-ass?" yelled Edward.

"Between you two, he is looking like a better option to drive back with," I crossed my arms. "Right now a dumb-ass sounds a lot better then a jackass."

"That's so fucking typical!" Edward cried. "Go ahead and get played, because if you are dumb enough to fall for it, then you deserve it."

Edward stormed back around and marched to my car, where he slammed the door and sped off.

I already held back once this past couple days, and I didn't want to do it now. I screamed out in frustration.

* * *

**Ok, so just take a deep breath. In….Out… Good. haha**

**SO I just want to say that Jacob is NOT a bad guy. It was stupid for him to go to Forks, but he is not a bad guy. Sure he is a jackass to Edward, but that is his competition, of course he is going to be mean to him.**

**Alice being Jewish, yep I did that for my friend (she is Jewish) and she told me that she was a Christmas Jew, so i decided that Alice would be like that too! haha**

**I know this chapter had a whole lot of everything. And there is nothing really I can explain here. But Edward was a tad bit out of line here.**

**Next chapter will be in Edward's POV and will be called: _New Year/New Pain_**

**I hope everyone has a great Holiday!!!!**

**Hope you enjoyed :)**


	21. New YearNew Pain

**Hello!!! I'm back!!! I'm sorry for not updating sooner, but vacation with family means not really being able to write. But I'm here now!!!**

**FYI: I'm down a beta, two sort of. One had to stop and the other's computer crashed . So this chapter was not completely beta proofed. Just a warning. and I know, it's not as long, but hey, i try :)**

**Another thing: I just want to say how much I LOVE reading your reviews or PM, I love all of it and all of you. From the readers to have been here from the moment I started chapter one, to the readers that write me and say that they stayed up all night reading it, and to everyone in between. You all are so amazing! And thank you for reading my not so little story.**

**Before you read this, go google _Kings of Leon_ their song _Closer_. Look at the lyrics while listening. Yep that is what I kept listening to while writing this.**

**I do not own Twilight, not a single bit.**

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Chapter 21- New Year/New Pain

Edward POV

This car wouldn't go fast enough. My car would have been able to handle going over 100mph much more smoothly. It was because this car was trying to hold me back closer to Fork, closer to Jacob, and closer that fucking mess I left with Bella.

A part of me was overwhelmingly guilty, but another part me (the more vocal part of me) continued to curse out loud.

Fuck.

Everything was going great. This vacation was more then I had even thought of what would happen when I came with Bella to Forks. I had thought that we were going to spend time with Charlie, hang around the house, and then open some presents that none of us really liked.

But even from the moment we arrived, and Bella and I took off to the grocery store, it was like a rollercoaster. I had enjoyed Bella telling off Lauren, but seeing Bella tell Mrs. H off was a whole different type of enjoyment, maybe because this time Bella was defending me. However I have to admit it did hurt my male ego a tad bit, but the fact that she cared about me enough to talk to an older former teacher made up for my bruised ego.

It didn't surprise me in the slightest that Lauren would make up all those lies. I know how she works, and will do whatever it takes for her to be the center of attention and away from any blame. Oh she is a prize.

What I was not ready for was the sudden need to go visit where my parents died. I had not been there in years, and when I did go I always went alone. If I had been closer to Jasper in the past couple of years then I probably would have asked him to go with me. But we weren't, so visiting them has always been a private thing; a painful thing.

However brining Bella with me felt natural. She was able to not say anything, yet the silence was not an awkward patronizing kind. Even when we got out of the car when we arrived Bella stood the background patient, quiet, and strong.

It felt right to be there again; to walk the place where I had when I was younger; and to be able to show Bella the place were I use to spend my time alone. The river was always a peaceful place, and I needed to go there after visiting where the house used to be.

And it was nice to tell someone about the money. I had felt guilty when I didn't use it after I left Portland, or at least have let Bella know much earlier that there was money in the bank. Maybe I cheated by telling her that while we stood on the land where my parents died, but I had always felt like I needed to tell her and being there had just provoked it.

It was good to get my mind off my parents. It was not as if I ignored them; but if I dwelled on them for too long my memory of them brings me only pain rather than the joy I feel when I do think of them.

Then the Christmas Eve party.

As always it was very entertaining to watch Bella squirm when she was not in her comfort zone. It's cruel, but it is still something that I thought was amusing. However it was not so amusing when I saw that old man put his hand all over her. Naturally my protective side came in, and I had to pull her away.

It was probably the drinks, which were made much stronger then others, or maybe it was the atmosphere, either way I had never been more thankful for hokey holiday traditions then at that moment. Bless that mistletoe.

I had imagined her lips for a while now, how soft and full they were, if she would take lead, or if I would take lead. Somehow it managed to be even better. Each second felt like a life time, yet those life times just blew away. But then we kissed again. That kiss was equally hers as it was mine.

Where it came from I still don't know.

I thought… I thought that maybe she was starting to fall for me. That she was finally starting to care for me the way I care for her. That possibly this was going to be the start of a new relationship. I let myself dream that she would call Jacob that night and tell him that they were over then she would confess that she wanted to be with me.

But we wouldn't talk about the kiss. In fact we wouldn't even talk for the rest of the night. I could feel how uncomfortable she was, and it scared me how in tuned I was to her. So I fallowed her lead with pretending that the kiss didn't happen, that what I had been hoping for, for weeks, did not happen.

Christmas was fun, which was another something I was not expecting. Since my parent's death, I had been spending Christmas with Lauren's family. Not the best memories there. Her family was dysfunctional and she always fought with her parents, showing them very little respect. It always made me feel more then just uncomfortable see her act out like that, to see the relationship she had with her parents; it made me wonder what kind of a mother she would make. I'm happy I'll never find out.

Bella though. The way Bella and Charlie interact with one another brings a smile to my face. And the way she looks out for her dad keeps the smile on my face. Although it was awkward at first; it felt like I was intruding. But Charlie was a very relaxed man, as was Bella, and with the two of them I was easily able to fall into line with the two of them.

I had been worried about Bella not liking the CD I made her. I had it made from the same studio where I have been recording my music. I had asked Emmett if it was alright to make this raw CD, and he told me he pulled a few strings to get it done. And I know how much of a big deal Bella makes out of expensive presents so I was very proud to have thought of something that will be meaningful.

The present that Bella gave me was amazing. She had put thought and (although I would have preferred without) money into it.

Everything was going perfectly.

And although we never mentioned the kiss, I thought about it constantly. I probably should have written it off as just a holiday kiss; luck for having a drunk woman and a mistletoe in the right place right time. But I thought about it, and deluded myself into believing that this was the start of our relationship, of us spending the rest of our loves together.

To think that just earlier today Bella and I were having a snow ball fight, acting like flirting third graders.

However I have grown to realize that Jacob has impeccable timing. Case in point: today.

To say that I was angry was an understatement. I had been putting off the reality that Bella and I were going back to the city where she would resume her relationship with Jacob. It's almost like when someone wakes you up ten minuets before your alarm goes off.

I probably shouldn't have opened my mouth and yelled at Jacob, but I was so angry for him ruining the moment that I just wanted to jump the guy right then and there. But then Bella started to _defend_ him. Him, Jacob; the one who was the jackass for showing up. She was going to let him tell her whatever bullshit story and she would believe it. I was just so sick and tired of having to put up with him, for pining after Bella, for having tricked myself that what I wanted so desperately was so close in my grasp and I had to start acting like a jealous idiot.

I pushed, and pushed, until she decided to drive back up with him instead. God, that just pushed me over the edge. It was the last little bit of time I had left of one on one with Bella, and she chose him over me.

"That's so fucking typical!" I had yelled at Bella this morning. "Go ahead and get played, because if you are dumb enough to fall for it, then you deserve it."

Shit. I felt sick just thinking about her face; a combination of shock and pain. Pain, I knew that I hurt her when I said that, but I chose to walk away and leave her hurting. I chose pain for her.

I slammed my fist against the door to my bathroom.

That had been my whole defense to myself as to why I was the better man for Bella then Jacob; because I would never hurt her.

I just want Bella here so I can apologize to her and tell her…

I let out a breath.

Tell her what? That the only reason why I was acting like such a jealous jerk is because I'm completely in love with her, and to see her anywhere near Jacob makes me want to revert to a caveman and just carry her away, but only after I fight him and prove that I'm the better man.

Yeah, that would get an interesting reaction from her to say the least.

I looked over at the clock on the table next to my bed. I had arrived around one in the afternoon. It was now four.

I knew that she would most likely arrive a little bit after me, but I was starting to get worried.

At six I was holding my cell phone debating if I wanted to risk calling her or not. What if she was in the middle of a discussion with Jacob right now where they are about to break up, and I call and stop that. I know I was probably reaching there, but a man can dream.

By nine I was starting to panic and started to call Bella, right as she walked threw the door.

I was sitting at my piano when I heard her cell ring. Hanging up my own cell, I silenced hers along with it. She stood in the door way with her bag at her side. We stood there staring at each other for a few seconds before I spoke up first.

"I'm sorry," I spoke softly. I wasn't sure why I felt the need to whisper, but the moment called for it. "I was an idiot, a jerk… I was horrible and I'm sorry."

Bella tried to smile, but it faltered. "I'm sorry, that he showed up like that, and I was pretty mean to you."

I took a few steps closer. "No, I provoked you, this is my fault. I don't get a say as to what goes on with you and Jacob."

"Yeah, but he intruded _our_ vacation, so you got some say here," she nodded. "But it is my relationship with him, and I will deal with him how I wish."

I looked down; ashamed. "So you dealt with him then? I know it's none of my business, but…"

"Yeah, we talked it out," Bella reached for her bag, but I beat her to it and carried it to her room. "He knows he was in the wrong."

I wanted to ask her why she was gone so long, instead I settled for saying, "I was worried about you… I thought something might have happened."

"I'm sorry," Bella looked down this time and bit her lip. "I was just worried about coming back home; I thought you were still mad at me."

Guilt swam threw my heart. I fallowed her back out to the living room where we sat on the couch. "Bella, this is your home. I'm sorry that you felt like you couldn't come to your home because of me, or that you couldn't talk to me."

"I know you don't like Jacob," Bella started. "But why?"

I paused. I had to be careful with this. "It's just that I know you can do better then him."

"So, nothing else? That's the only reason?" Bella looked at me, her eyes seemed to be a darker shade and almost glossy as if she was trying to prevent them from even tearing up. Her voice had quivered, trying to maintain control. The look on her face was almost as if she was trying to plead with me.

"That's it," I breathed.

Bella hung her head and took a deep breath. When she looked back up, a shining caught my eye. When I looked more closely I saw that she was wearing a diamond necklace, one that I had never seen before.

"Where did you get that?" I reached over and ran my finger over the expensive jewelry. "I've never seen this before."

Bella was not one to normally wear jewelry, and diamonds like these were not something she would accept as a present.

Bella blushed, but not the normal blush that I loved. "It was a Christmas present," she whispered as she leaned away from my fingers. "It's from Jacob."

And I had just put my temper back into place.

"What?" I brought my hand back, and rested it at my leg as I clenched into a fist then relaxed it, then back into the fist, then relax.

"After Jacob and I talked things out, he gave me my present, which is this," she waved her hand around her neck. "It's nothing really."

"Nothing?" I asked incredulously. "So now you like getting presents, is that it?"

Bella blinked a few times in disbelief before her brows brought together in anger.

"Why does it matter to you what he gets me or not?" she asked.

"Do you really think that I wanted to just get you that CD?" I started to loose control over the volume of my voice; it started to rise a bit. "Do you know many presents I wanted to get for you? Presents that include spending money."

"You got me the book for my birthday," she defended, yet her anger was still evident.

"Yeah, and you threw biggest hissy-fit," I argued. "And at least I got you something that I know you would like. A diamond necklace? You don't like jewelry."

"Look, Jacob is not like you, or the rest of our friends. He doesn't know how to express how he cares about a person, so he uses presents like these to express himself."

"Do you hear yourself?" I yelled.

"He is my boyfriend," Bella yelled right back. "And boyfriends can do that!"

"No, you're just saying that because it will comfort you. But the truth is you are a fucking sell out, no better then a god-damn whore!"

Her eyed filled with tear that she couldn't restrain. I could see the frustration and anger at herself for crying in front of me. And I could see her anger for me.

She stood up and walked back to her room where she slammed the door behind her.

I leaned forward, where my elbows were on my knees and my hands tangled my hair in a fist.

I just_ had_ to lose my temper for the second time today. Do I not have any restraint anymore? I had made Bella angry, hurt her, and made her cry. And I never hated myself more.

A thunder storm raged outside, as if our anger had manifested its self. I was in my PJ pants, tucked under the covers, and had the lights off; yet I couldn't sleep. I had just laid there in bed, not moving as I stared up to the ceiling. I didn't know how to make this better. I didn't know what to say.

I sat up and look at the clock which glowed in the dark saying it was 2:40 am. With a heavy breath I kicked the covers back and made my way to my door. Everything in the house was quiet, as if everything was still to see what the storm would bring.

I stood outside of Bella's door before I opened it quietly. With soft steps I walked to her bed. Bella laid curled up on her side in an uneasy sleep. I lifted the covers and lied down with her. She jerked awake and gasped when she saw me on my side facing her.

"I'm sorry," I whispered lightly. "I'm sorry for having to say sorry so much… I'm so sorry."

Bella didn't say anything. She wrapped her arms around my neck and started to cry.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled into her hair while I stroked her back. "I'm so sorry."

I woke up before Bella the next morning and started my "I'm so sorry, so I'm going to kiss ass" day. I made as elaborate of a breakfast as I could make while still keeping it edible, which extended to only scramble eggs, and toast.

Bella came into the kitchen right after I had set everything up. Her hair was a mess, and her eyes puffy. I was going to have to suck up big time.

"Morning," I smiled. "So I err… made you breakfast. If that's ok?"

Bella looked down at the table silently then looked back at me. "You really didn't have to do this," she smiled as she sat down.

"Yes, I did…" I started before Bella cut me off.

"But you are kissing some ass right now, right?" she looked up at me a small smile on her face, and her cheeks red.

"You know me too well," I sat down in my normal spot.

Bella looked back down at her food, "Thank you.'

"I'm sorry." Then we ate breakfast in a semi comfortable silence.

As much as we attempted to continue our normal routine, there was something off between the two of us. Neither one of us would maintain eye contact for too long, and if we accidentally touched the each other, we would jump back as if we had touched an electric wire.

I tried to start a conversation here and there, and Bella would go right along with me, but somewhere along the way the conversation would die into an awkward silence. Bella made her attempts of making a few joke, obviously trying to liven the situation. But like our conversations now, it would lead nowhere.

The fact of the matter is that we were both still too hurt to get back to normal. Bella was hurt because of me and what I had said, accused her of, and called her. (I'm a class A jackass.) And I was hurt because Bella is still with Jacob. Bella could make out that much, that I didn't like the two of them together; but she still couldn't figure out why. Or at least that was what I suspected seeing as she never came to talk to me about it.

So in the time between our arrival back into Seattle and New Years Eve, we spent most of our time away from each other. At least I knew Bella wasn't spending all her time with Jacob. According to Rose, Bella was helping Esme out with preparations for the New Years Eve party, which (thank you Esme) was taking a lot of time. And as Rose described what was going into the party, then Bella was not spending much time with Jacob at all.

I spent most of my time with Emmett, and Jasper who had come back early with Alice. Apparently Alice had spent enough quality time with her sister.

I told them what had happened and they each took turns to punch me. Not the "hey you were a jerk man, so let this fake punch symbolize that" but a "how dare you hurt Bella, you deserve much more then just this punch."

My gut throbbed, but I bit back the pain as I stumbled into the couch in Jasper's apartment. I deserved it.

"You are a fucking idiot you know?" Emmett glared at me. I had grown use to his friendly and carefree disposition, but now I remembered exactly how truly terrifying he really is.

"You called Bella a whore," Jasper shook his head. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I know," I croaked out. "I did more then fuck everything up. I hurt her, because I'm the jealous idiot who never had enough balls to tell her how I really feel."

"So what are you going to do?" Emmett growled.

"I'm going to stop trying to win her over right now, that's for damn sure." I shook my head. "Right now, I just want; no… I _need_ to make her happy again."

"Right answer," Emmett extended his hand to me to help pull me off the couch.

"I will make thing better," I whispered more to myself.

"I know you will," Jasper patted me on the back.

I should have known that the punches that I had to take with Emmett and Jasper would have been the easy part. Facing Alice and Rose, now there is where my real worries laid. I had been fortunate enough to miss them, but on the 30th they had finally cornered me at the apartment.

They both walked in with out even looking at me. I knew that Bella was having lunch with Emmett and Jasper, so they also knew that we were perfectly alone.

"We helped you fight for Bella because we thought you were a good guy who, maybe didn't exactly deserve her, would make her happy," Alice face me with her arms folded in front of her chest. "Apparently we were more then wrong."

Ouch. I guess they were going for verbal punches.

"Look, you guys just know her side of the story…" Rosalie cut me off.

"You mean there is more?" she asked in fake shock. "More then you loosing your temper and blowing up at her where it was not your place to meddle, then calling her dumb and telling her she deserves whatever horrible things Jacob may throw at her. Or is there more to the story of when you flipped out and threw a temper tantrum because Jacob bought her an expensive necklace, then accused her of selling out but only right before calling her a whore. Are you telling me there is more then that?"

I took a deep breath as I let my head hang. "You're right, I did do all that, and I hurt her, which has been tearing me up more then I can even put to words. The necklace, and the… name calling is inexcusable, so is when I lost my temper at her back in Forks. But did she tell you guys that we kissed."

Rose and Alice exchanged shocked looks. I kept going.

"We were a Christmas Eve party, and we're under the mistletoe," I looked up to meet them both in the eye. "It wasn't just a small peck that people do under the mistletoe; it was a real kiss where we were both breathless. Then we kissed again right after. I thought that it was the start of something, I thought that we would be together, I thought…"

I was glaring at my feet, and I knew Rose and Alice were probably having a silent conversation.

Finally Alice spoke. "You know you are going to have to work really hard just to get things back to normal with her."

"Normal is all I'm asking for right now," I nodded.

As I got ready for the party on New Years Eve, I felt more miserable then I had wanted to allow myself to be. Bella had ran into my room, curlers in her hair and Converse on her feet, to tell me that she would finish getting ready at the hotel where the party would be in their ballroom. Esme had also paid for a hotel room assuming that she, and whoever would help, would get ready there.

I knew that I was more moody then expected when I had finished dressing. I had on a very nice pair of crisp black slacks, a black button up shirt made out of a soft material, a black silk tie, and a black jacket. I was dressed completely in black. The effect did make my eyes standout, but my hair would not comply with me so I gave up before I really even began.

Rose and Alice were also helping with last minuet party stuff, so the guys and I decided to meet there. I was fortunate though that when I talked to them, they seemed to be cool with me, so maybe this night wouldn't be so horrible.

I arrived at 9:30 to see if I could help with anything, but I found that the party was already in full swing. The ballroom was huge, and was already packed with people that I had never seen before. Bella had told me that this was one of the "it" parties to go to, but I had no idea exactly what "it" had meant. The walls had silver and gold decorations with the year that we were entering posted all over. I looked to the ceiling and saw a giant net holding in an incase amount of balloons and confetti in.

I found Carlisle and Esme, the host and hostess, and made small talk with them before another person arrived and demanded their attention. Right as I was beginning to wonder how the hell I would be able to find my group, a hand grabbed me and I heard a voice shout out over the loud music, "I found him!"

I turned to see Alice smiling away as she held my arm. She looked beautiful, in her Alice way. She had on a short silver tube top dress, and I could see that her eyes were outlined in a silver glitter as well.

Jasper, who had reached us first, was wearing a black suit and with a matching silver shirt. Emmett had on an all white suit, and guessing from the expression on Rose's face, that was not what was according to her plan. Rose was stunning as always in a short blue dress that kind of reminded me of a mermaid. Her dress was a halter, which straps were made out of diamond looking stones.

Bella showed up next. Her wavy hair was clipped back, and some of the strands were relaxing on her almost bare shoulders. Her dress has thin spaghetti straps which held up her short cocktail dress. The lining of the dress was a bright pink, but there was a black netting over it, which gave it an almost dark purple look. He long fair legs looked like they could stretch for miles before coming to a stand still at a pair of very high healed shoes.

Jacob was at her arm.

I fallowed them as we wound our way threw the crowd to an empty table in one of the corners. I looked around and saw that there were many tables like this that outlined the dance floor, only this table had a _reserved_ sign on it.

"This is our table," explained Rose. "Consider this as home base, we regroup here."

Emmett saluted her before he sunk an arm around her waist. "Come on Rosie, let's go show these fools what it is to dance."

Rose giggled as she fallowed him out.

"Oh hell no!" Alice pouted. "Jaz, we cannot let them think that they can show us up, come on." Alice grabbed the hand of a very happy looking Jasper.

Jacob turned to Bella and extended his hand, "Shall we?"

Bella blushed and shook her head. "I can't dance, I'm horrible at it, and I really don't want to start off the New Year in the emergency room."

"Come on baby," Jacob pleaded.

Bella gnawed on her on her bottom lip. "Alright," she said quietly before looking over at me and gave me an apologetic smile.

And then there was one.

I did what all single people did during this time; I went to get a drink.

One drink turn into two, this turned into three, which turn into loosing count after that.

I watched Bella and Jacob dance, and I smiled every time she would step on his feet and would see Jacob's pained expression. She had dance much better with me.

I was standing by the bar, still watching them, when I felt a pair of eyes on me. I turned to see a woman about my age standing next to me, much closer then I would have expected. She was tall, not quite as tall as me, but she was still very tall. She was also very attractive in her way with pale white skin that matched Bella's and sharp black hair cut into and equally sharp bob. She had bright green eyes, and a red gloss on. Her dress was short, very short, and black. It flowed around her chest and waist, but hem clung to her legs.

"So which one are you in love with?" she asked as she nodded her head in the direction of Jacob and Bella.

"What makes you say I'm in love?" I looked back at the two dancing.

"It's the guy isn't it?" she shook her head. "You're in love with that basketball player right?"

I choked on my drink. "No, it's the girl."

"Oh thank God," the woman sighed. "You are too hot to be straight, but I guess there are still a few hot straight guys left."

"Thank you… I think."

"I'm Ashley," she stuck out her hand.

"Edward," I shook her hand.

"So what is this," she waved to Bella. "An ex girlfriend, or maybe you never really met her but love her from far away."

"Unrequited love actually," I sighed. "She is my best friend, my roommate, and she saved my life."

"Ouch, that's the worst."

"Tell me about it," I nodded.

"So what about the guy?" Ashley asked. "He is fucking hot my friend, totally not in your league of hotness, but he is famous."

"He is… turning out to be better for her then me."

"I don't believe it," Ashley stated bluntly.

"And why is that?" I asked.

"Well your lover girl over there, can't dance worth shit." I frowned, but she kept going. "And he is not helping her get any better, he is letting her suck."

"So…"

"_So_ I have a feeling that if you danced with her you would try to help get better. And the good couples always help one another."

I didn't say anything, I didn't want to start deluding myself again.

"So if you want to make her jealous, you and I can go upstairs and mess around," Ashley looked at me with a suggestive smile. "We would kill two birds with one stone: you would make her jealous, and I would get to have sex with you. It's a win, win."

I couldn't help but smile at Ashley's directness. "As tempting as that is," I eyed her up and down, it was tempting. "I'm in love with her, and I wouldn't feel right sleeping with someone else, even if she and I aren't together."

Ashley just shrugged, an amused smile on her face. "See I told you, you are the better one for her. Now I have to go meet up with my boyfriend, good luck!"

I watched Ashley, laughing to myself, as she walked up to a male version of herself and gave him a big kiss and gave me the thumbs up before going to the dance floor.

The slight rise in my mood quickly diminished when I realized that the count down to midnight was about to start. I was back at the table, along with everyone else in our group. Couples holding hands, a drink in my hand.

_10_

I was angry again, it seemed like I'm always angry now.

_9_

I was angry at myself for having messed up so much.

_8_

I was angry that I'm coming to the realization that Jacob might be a better guy for Bella then I would be.

_7_

I was angry that I'm such a sick masochist and I forced myself to watch Bella and Jacob dance all night.

_6_

I was angry that Bella couldn't get that fact that I'm in love with her.

_5_

I was angry because the timing in my life was so perfectly fucked up.

_4_

I was angry that I disappointed my friends.

_3_

I was angry because I keep hurting Bella.

_2_

I was angry for letting myself feel sorry for myself.

_1_

And I was angry because I found the one person that I want to spend the rest of my life with, but I have to watch her be happy with someone else.

_Happy New Years!!!_

The multi colored balloons dropped and the confetti flittered to the ground.

Everyone one around me kissed their partner, and I chugged down my drink. The alcohol burned all the way down. This was a different type of alcohol then I had been drinking all night. But this was a new year, which meant a new pain.

* * *

**It's a slower, sadder chapter I know. But Edward is messing up big time right now, and I just have to show where his head is at.**

**Again: google _Kings of Leon_ their song _Closer_. That's what helped me write this chapter.**

**I hope you guys were able to catch a few things in here. Like when Bella asked him if there was another reason why she should be with Jacob, she was giving him the opportunity to say that he loved her. And few metaphors I threw in threw out there too.**

**So, next chapter is called: _Shoot_**

**It will be in Bella's POV and also remember that the end is coming near. I'm writing up to an even 30 chapters. So just hold on.**

**Thanks for being awesome guys**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	22. The Shoot

**I am sorry for the wait guys. But this chapter was hard for me to write. It is the chapter before the BIG chapter. But this is still needed.**

**I am very happy so many of you liked Ashley from last chapter; she is based one of my good friends, Ashley. And yes, she is just as awesome.**

**My beta is still out, so please go along with it. I tried to check it as much as I could.**

**I do not own twilight.**

* * *

Chapter 22- Shoot

Bella POV

I was getting restless. I felt like I wanted to jump out of my own skin. I needed to do _something_, but something would involve me leaving my room, and now-a-days that was not a very appealing option. I haven't dreaded leaving my room since Edward first arrived. Yet now, months later, I just stared at my door not really wanting to face Edward again.

It's not that he was mean, not outright at least. But he has a different edge to him now, and it was not an appealing edge.

We had "reconciled" after the whole Forks incident, but things have never been the same since. True I was still a little sore from what he had call me, but he was acting out as if he had never came into my room that night and apologized. That fact is that while I was going to tell Jacob off on my own, Edward jumped in when he should have just let me handle it. When I came back to apologize to him about Jacob showing up, everything seemed to be going smoothly enough, but then he saw that Jacob had bought me a necklace. The stubborn side of me continued to tell me that Edward has no right of being angry that Jacob had gotten me that present; that what goes on between me and my _boyfriend_ has nothing to do with Edward. However the reasonable side of me can see why Edward is upset.

I had told him off so many times about not getting me anything when I know just how much he not only want to spend on me, but I know that he feels like he owes me.

But why should I feel guilty for getting a nice present from my boyfriend?

I have never had a friend call me any type of insulting name before. Sure Emmett teases me sometimes, but he never crossed the line Edward did. I was not sure what hurt more: the intensity I saw behind Edward's eyes as he said it, or thought that he might actually mean it.

Before I could make a fool of myself and start crying in front of Edward, or say something that I might regret; I left for my bedroom. I discarded my clothes so quickly as if the cause to all of our fighting were interlaces with the fine stitches. I crawled into my bed, and cried out my hurt, and guilt.

I had fallen into an uneasy sleep, and was startled to find Edward climbing into my bed with me, apologizing. I could feel his sincerity, but I could also feel that he was holding back. After that I was able to sleep peacefully. Since then I have not sleep as well, and since then I haven't touched Edward or him me.

I never realized I was a touchy feely person until the awkwardness between Edward and I reached this point where I was being so care around him. He now wouldn't casually toss his arm around my shoulders, or randomly tackle me and tickle me so he could get his way. The only time we were in contact with one another was when we would accidentally touch, or when he would reach out to steady me as I was about to trip.

It wasn't like I was helping the situation. I kept my distance from him on a daily basis. I wasn't so reserved on purpose; it just developed with the situation. But I did miss smother myself in his chest when I would give him a hug for just hanging out with me. I missed being myself with my friend; I missed my friend.

But when I would suck it up and try to talk to Edward and hang out with him; he would glower at me as if my presence had just darkened his day. Conversation was strain, all topics lead to dead ends; except one.

I was always very careful of not talking about Jacob at all. When I would go hand out with Jacob, I would just tell Edward I was going out but I never say where. However, occasionally our conversation would lead to Jacob (not by my doing) and that would be the only time Edward would speak more then five words in a row.

Edward would scoff and criticize Jacob in every aspect he could find and if I were to defend Jacob then I would end up looking like the bad guy.

But if Edward was not giving me so much crap lately, and we would talk like we use to, then he would know just how things between Jacob and I were.

At least Jacob wasn't badmouthing Edward; I would not have been able to handle it coming from both sides. No, the problems that Jacob and I were having were not Edward related; they were everything else.

Ever since New Years I have been slowly separating myself from him. Jacob and I were not meant for each other, I knew that from the first moment we went out. But he was a nice, good looking guy and I needed to remind myself just how much I didn't have a crush on Edward.

However Jacob was starting to try and get more and more physical and it was getting harder for him to stop which lead me to not wanting to get physical with him if the end result would be him making a big huffing noise and stomping off to go cool down.

He could tell I was pulling away from him, which he responded by trying to hold on to me. Each week I was spending less time with Jacob, less time with my friends, and less time with Edward. I just needed to breathe without being berated by someone.

Even my friends were not helping with this stress. They lectured me on how I needed to talk to Edward, and when I would tell them that I would try to get him to open up to me, but he would just shoot me down; Alice's and Rose's response was that I needed to try harder.

I'm sorry, but I can only be ignored by Edward so much before I can take a hint and leave him alone. And being criticized is not what I think of Edward as opening up to me.

Emmett and Jasper claimed that they were going to stay out of this, whatever "this" is. But I could tell that they wanted to tell me something and were holding back. Which was a different type of torture; I have to stay well rounded after all.

I now spent a lot of my time either locked in my room, down at a local park (particularly the Seattle Center Fountain), or at any book store where I could write in peace.

Before I could make up my mind on where I wanted to wallow, my cell phone went off.

"Bella, it's Rose," Rose had her business voice on.

"Hey Rose," I sighed into the phone.

"Well I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy from that greeting." I ignored her comment so she went on. "I'm sorry did I interrupt you from hiding yourself in the city, and not telling any of us where you exactly are?"

"I tell you I'm around," I defended.

"Whatever," she dismissed, but I could still hear how perturbed she really was. "I'm calling you to remind you about your photo shoot with Cosmo is this week."

I felt my face drain; that brought me back to reality. "Right, I blocked that out," I groaned.

Rose laughed and I could tell her mood was lightening up. "Don't worry Bella, the clothes you have to wear will be laid out for you, there will be hair and makeup stylist to do their thing. There is really nothing to worry about."

I nodded my head then realized that she couldn't see me, "Alright. So this is their top 30 women under 30 right? For their Valentines issue?"

"You are still going to be one of their top 30, number 13 actually," I rolled my eyes but let Rose continue. "But it will not be for the February issue. They change these things like crazy all the time. This will be the April issue, which will come out in mid March."

"That's weird," I mused as I tugged on my shoes.

"Yeah the magazine world is a very odd world," Rose sounded frustrated. I wonder how many arguments she had with them over the phone. "So who are you bringing with you?"

I opened my mouth to tell Rose that she was coming with me, but I remembered that she had told me a while ago that she would be busy this week, along with Alice, and Jasper, and Emmett. I guess that only leaves one person. "Everyone is still busy right?" I asked again, just to make sure.

"Everyone but Edward," Rose confirmed my fear.

"Well I need to ask him… he might not want to go with me." That was true enough, and also part of my fear of asking Edward to come with me. I was scared that he would laugh at me for not wanting to go by myself.

"Great! The photo shoot is this Thursday, on the 15th. I'll e-mail you the directions on where to go, and you should be there by 9am sharp. Good luck!" Rose hung up.

I stretched out my arms, and shook it off as if I was about to go into a rigorous work out. After a few moments of mentally chanting to myself that I could do this, I strolled out of my room.

Edward was sitting at his piano, from what I could tell he had given up on the one beautiful song I had heard him working on. Now he had been composing a darker and painful piece; it only made me worry about him all the more.

He looked up as I walked into the room with a half hearted smile that wasn't even close to reaching his eyes.

"Hey," I smiled as I sat on one of the chairs. I felt a pain when I realized that only last month I would have sat next to him on the piano bench. I shook off the thought. "How is the wonderful world of piano playing going?" I grinned.

"Wonderful," he answered in a way to show me that he wasn't going to play along.

"Right… well do you remember how Rose got me to go on Cosmo in their top 30 under 30?" he nodded. "Well it's this Thursday and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me?"

Edward lifted his head a little higher and I could see some life come back in his eyes. "Really?"

"Yeah! It will be fun," I smiled. "We can make a day of it. We go get breakfast at that really greasy dinner you love so much, then head down to the photo shoot. I'm not sure how long it will be, but for dinner we could pick up some Chinese and talk about how lame everyone was."

I bit my lip, and I noticed that I was breathing a little heavier after my long explanation which I only used one breath on. My heart was beating faster also, but not because of my long winded offer, but the fear of rejection. I wanted Edward to come with me, joke with me, and have it be like old time. I hoped that this would be our chance to get back on track, for us to get over this hiccup between our friendship.

"That's sound like a lot of fun," Edward smile which reached his eyes.

I let out a breath and felt myself relax considerably. I use to never have to be so nerves to ask Edward to come with me somewhere. Then again I never felt like our friendship depended on how well our everyday interaction went.

Between asking Edward if he wanted to go to the photo shoot and the actually photo shoot, nothing between us changed; nothing got better.

_But nothing got worse_. Countered that stupid optimistic voice in my heart.

I was embarrassed over how I acted this week. It was obvious that was trying to fix us, and that I was slowly loosing hope that thing would ever be ok between us.

I relayed my fears to Jacob the night before the photo shoot. We were at his apartment and were eating dinner when I finally had confided in him. I explained to Jacob my concern about Edward not getting any better, and my fear of it hurting our friendship.

Jacob wrinkled his nose as if he was about to say something distasteful, but I could see him refraining from it, and quickly applied a more worrisome expression. Even I could tell that he was holding back his nastiness on this subject.

"Well sometimes friends grow apart, and you can't really help it," Jacob smiled, although I could see how strained it was.

"But I don't want to grow apart from Edward," I defended. "I want us to go back to us being close, I want thing to be the way they use to be!"

"What, the way they use to be when he had just gotten dumped, and lost everything?" Jacob raised an eyebrow. "You want the Edward the needed and depended on you, and considered you as his 'savior'? Is that the Edward you want?"

I gaped at him. "No! No, I never want Edward to be that hurt, that vulnerable again."

"But it was when he was hurt and vulnerable that the two of you got along," Jacob countered.

I opened my mouth, and then closed it. I wanted to argue him, to defend Edward. To tell Jacob that he didn't know what he was talking about, and that Edward and I were close after he gotten back on his feet. But before I could formulate any thoughts Jacob kept talking.

"Think about it Bella," he placed his hand on my arm. "Once Edward started making money, really making money; then got that offer from Andrew Lloyd Webber making his income set, that is when he started to change right?"

I still couldn't speak. No, this wasn't right. I was missing something here. There was something else around that time that happened, where Edward started acting different. I know that I can't be because he doesn't need me anymore. Edward and I are friends.

But it was hard to keep telling myself that as Jacob continue to stress how Edward and I were only friends because of circumstance, and now that those circumstances have changed…

"No," I interrupted Jacob firmly. "Edward and I are still friends. I don't want to talk about this any more."

So on Thursday morning, as I slung on my jacket, I felt the pressure of this day needing to go well for the sake of our friendship. Maybe I should take some Tumbs with me.

Edward and I agreed to walk to the greasy little dinner, and then take a cab to the warehouse where the photo shoot would be. The walk was odd at first; it was raining and we were sharing an umbrella, forcing us to be in close proximity with each other.

We were only a block away from the apartment, and the tension was building like crazy. The rain didn't seem too bad when we left, and I only had my umbrella for a just-incase-moments, but now that it's raining more then ever… know that we'll still have each other.

I started laughing uncontrollably, to the point where Edward and I had to stop. He looked at my with such concern, probably certain that I had finally lost it.

"Bella," Edward crouched down so that he was at eye level with me. "Are you alright?"

"You can stand under my umbrella," I gasped with laughter.

Edward just looked at me with more confutation and more apprehension.

"You can stand under my umbrella," I giggled again. "Ella, ella, eh eh eh."

Edward rolled his eyes and let out a pent up sight as he saw where I was going with this.

"Under my umbrella," I started bobbing my head in time with the melody. "Ella, ella, eh eh eh."

"I thought you were going crazy Bella," Edward looked at me with a stern look, but I could see the corners of his mouth pulled up as he fought a smile. "This rain is making you crazy Bella, when the sun shines-"

"We'll shine together?" I cut him off. "I believe I told you I'd be here forever." I had abandoned the melody of the song, and I recited the words as if I was having an actual conversation. "I definitely said I'd always be your friend, and somewhere along the way I believe I took a legal oath stating, and I quote, 'I'm gonna stick it our till the end.'"

"That is not even how the words go," Edward laughed. "You are just making stuff up with it now."

I bit my lip so I could hold down my laughter, as I looked up eagerly at Edward's amused emerald eyes.

After a minuets Edward let out a sigh and stuck out his arm so I could take it. "You can stand under my umbrella," he caved.

"You can stand under my umbrella," I giggled back.

"Ella, elle, eh eh eh, under my umbrella," we laughed in unison.

And with that horrible burst out in song moment, our morning was saved; although it was not our normal care free banter that I had grown use to, but I would take whatever I could get.

Breakfast went by painlessly enough, and we both ridiculed each other for our choice of breakfast. But in the end we were both regretting how much we ate.

The rain had cleared up, making my gray jacket, black tank top, and light blue jeans much more appropriate. Edward took off his jacket as we walked; revealing a green t shirt and dark blue jeans. It's funny how he can manage to make a jeans and t shirt look like it is made for the runways in Paris. Well it's not really funny as it is sucky. Why is it that the guy here makes that look work? And I'm the one on the way to the photo shoot.

The warehouse where the photo shoot was being done was on the out skirts of the city right along Elliot Bay. It reminded me of a type of place where people who are stupid enough to fall for a lame trick, would go there after being invited and end up being brutally murdered. But only really stupid people would fall for that…like certain people who are willing to believe that they are worthy enough of being on Cosmo. At least I'm taking Edward down with me.

The cabby gave us a funny "have fun dieing" kind of a look, and when I told Edward this he just laughed and shook his head asking me how I could tell what that kind of a look looked like.

"It just can," I mumbled.

As we walked closer to the building I could feel a pulsing vibration. I looked to Edward and he just shrugged his shoulders, so I kept walking. When we reached the large steal doors I bit my lip debating if it would be dorky to nock, or impolite to just walk in. Before I could start really freaking out, a tall haggard looking woman came out.

She obviously did not have naturally black hair, no one can naturally have that black of hair; plus she had blond eyebrows. Her hair was formed in a straight short, stringing bob that framed her face.

I couldn't tell if she had just gotten a really bad face lift, or if she had a lot of miles on her. Judging from the cigarette in one hand, and a cup of coffee in the other, I'm thinking it was the later.

To go with that whole "heroin chic" look, she was thin enough and unnaturally white enough to be considered a line heroin. She looked like she was drowning in her baby doll dress.

"Who are you?" she croaked; her voices just as worn as her looks.

"I'm Bella Swan," I answered cautiously. "I'm here for the photo shoot."

"About fucking time," the woman threw out her cigarette, pulled out another one and started walking in the building.

I was too stunned to move, but I felt Edward take my arm and start to lead me in. Thank goodness he was here.

"I'm sorry," my voice died amongst all of the loud music. "I didn't realize I was late."

Rose told me to be here at 9 am sharp, but I had wanted to be early so Edward and I had arrived here at 8:30.

"This is the world of fashion and entertainment," the woman laughed a crude laugh over her shoulder. "You're always late."

I was in a daze trying to take everything in. I could see a few small spaces set up for the photo shoot to take place. One looked like a bookstore/ library type of place; clever. The other just had a pink backdrop, and a wind machine place right in front of it. I don't know how I was going to come out alive without looking like an idiot. The last set up was my favorite. It looked like a living room, or really only part of a living room. There was a love seat and coffee table, and a bookcase in the back that was filled with what I was sure to be fake books.

The rest of the area in the warehouse consisted oh racks of clothes, which I prayed to God that I would _not_ be wearing, and a bunch of very expensive looking electrical equipment.

I was so amazed with how many people, and how much worked needed to go into the photo shoot that I almost missed what the woman had just said.

"I'm Meg, the shoot director. If you listen to me, and not try to come up with your own improve ideas on what may or may not look good, then we might just be able to get out of here in time for me to catch a flight and be home just in time to have real sex with my boyfriend so I don't have to fake another orgasm, are we clear?"

There was no way to respond to that other than just nodding my head.

"Good, we are at hair and make up," Meg looked around. "Tiffany, get your ass over here and fix this girl." Meg finally rested her eyes on Edward, although how she managed to miss him was beyond me. "Who are you?" she asked.

"I'm Edward," Edward stuck out his hand. "I'm here with Bella."

"Hmm… we are going to talk Edward, you and me, in private." Meg gave him, what I suppose was a seductive stare while taking a drag. It might have been sexy, if she had not started coughing up a lung.

"Later," she croaked. "Later."

"That was…" Edward faded while we watch Meg walk away and started bitching to another person.

"Attractive?" I offered with a grin.

"Smoking is one of the most vial things that a woman or anyone could do," Edward shook his head.

A small girl with died fire-engine red hair bounced up to us. She looked like she was still in junior high, but that image was thrown off by the multi colored tattoos going up and down both arms. Her clothing choice looked like she had hand picked it out of the 90's grunge scene with loose blue jeans reaching all the way to her upper waist, and her flannel lumberjack shirt.

"What's up?" Tiffany smacked her gum. "Looks like I'll be fixing you up. Don't think I need to do much fixing though. These people like the natural look on their girls now." She shook her head and caught a glance at Edward. "Hey beautiful, you can just pull up a chair and park up here."

Edward shifted uncomfortably and took a step further behind me. "I think I'll just stand…err… here."

Tiffany smacked her gum and rolled her eyes simultaneously. "I'm a lesbian man. You don't have to worry about me, if anything you should worry about Meg."

"Yeah, I can already see that," Edward looked annoyed with that thought. I hope bringing him here was a good thing.

"Besides, missy here is much more my type," Tiffany winked at me.

I immediately blushed and looked away, not sure of what to do.

"Whoa! Did you see how fast she went all red?" Tiffany started studying my face which made me blush even harder. "Does this always happen to her?"

"Constantly," Edward nodded.

"Looks like that save me time from adding any blush on ya," Tiffany shrugged then got to work.

She rambled on and on about her life. I now know she was the third oldest, one older brother, one sister, and she had a younger brother as well. His name was Ben. She prefers dogs over cats. String cheese gives her diarrhea (oh, that was a fun one to hear about). And she even spent some time trying to convince me to swing over to her side of the team. But when she realized how much I blush, she noted that it wasn't going to look good on camera all flushed so she quitted.

Edward sat behind me the whole time and didn't help with the conversation at all. Even when Tiffany tried to include him, he would blow her off. Looks like he was having another one of his mood swings.

He finally left to go use the restroom, when Tiffany leaned lower to me, and lowered her voice.

"Is he always like that?" she asked, nodding her head in the direction where Edward had just left.

I sighed and forced a small sad smile. "Lately he has been. I don't know what happened, but something is going on to get him all pissy like that."

"That boy has got some issues…" Tiffany let out a dramatic whistle as if to prove her point.

"Why do you say that?" I tried to keep my voice neutral.

She snorted as she padded some powder onto my face. "Fist off, his name is Edward. I would have issues if I was named after some old dude."

"It's a good strong name," I defended.

"Whatever," Tiffany waved her hand. "Second is that he looks at you as if he is about to throw himself in front of you for a bullet or something, then the next minuet he looks downright pissed off at you." Tiffany raised an eyebrow at me. "Are you guys _just_ friend?"

"Yes," I answered. Although now I felt like we were hardly that.

"Like I said: issues," Tiffany went back to her work.

The library looking background was the first shoot. I stood awkwardly in a stylish 20's like black pencil skirt, and a white shirt that had too many ruffles for my taste. Tiffany swore to me that it was hottest thing out there right now. My hair was in an extravagant bun on top of my head while some strategically placed strands of hair framing my face. What really worried me was the 4 inch killer heals. But even I had to admit that they were hot.

Edward stood brooding next to me, his arms crossed as he gazed around us. It is moments like this when I wanted to grab his face and force him to tell me what was wrong, or have him tell me what I needed to make thing better between us. I don't know much longer I can keep seeing this angry Edward. It's not like I wanted to break up our friend ship; God no. But seeing him _all_ the time in this perpetual state of being pissed off, and being just mean…

"Isabella!" an unfamiliar voice called out to me.

I turned to see a boy who looked like he could be no more then 19. His hair was a dark brown that looked so light and fluffy I wanted to pat my hand on it and see if there was any product that held it in that unnatural perfect position. But I couldn't see any product.

He wasn't very tall, maybe an inch taller then me. But when I looked at him, his hair was not what caught my attention, which I think is what he was going for. He had on bright neon green pants that looked so tight that I thought they were made for a 12 year old girl rather then this boy/man. The shirt I did like though. It reminded me of the big white puffy shirts that romance novel covers had the men wear.

He grabbed my hand, kissed it, and then pulled me into a tight hug. "Oh Isabella, I am very excited to meat you. Your work is brilliant, and you look sex in those 'fuck me' shoes."

"Err… thank you?" I looked over at Edward who looked like he was about to pop a blood vessel. "Who are you?"

"My apologies," the stranger took a step back, but still held my hand. "I am Loftus, and I will be the photographer for this shoot."

I had heard of Loftus. Rose had wanted him to take a few pictures of me, but he was so busy that it never happened. Loftus was 19, but he had been around since he was 14. The kid had some major talent which is why he was here today working for Cosmo.

"It's nice to meet you," I smiled politely; he was still holding my hand.

"Oh my, you look…" Loftus closed his eyes with a small smile on his face. I _really_ did _not_ want to know what he was thinking about. And as he opened his eyes it looked like he wasn't going to say, thank God.

Loftus glanced over at Edward and did a double take. "Well hello tall, fair, and brooding."

Wait, was he checking Edward out? Wasn't he doing that to me just a few seconds ago?

"And who might you be sexy?" Loftus purred.

"I'm Edward, Bella's roommate."

"And best friend," I added smiling up to Edward.

Loftus closed his eyes again in imagination. "Oh the thing that could happen if I lived with the two of you…"

Looks like that answers my question. He _was_ hitting on me _and_ Edward.

Loftus shook his head, but that dreamy smile stayed. "Thoughts of pleasure will be put aside… for now." He winked at the both of us. Yeah, that's weird.

"I'm afraid Edward that I need to ask you to step off set for a little bit while I take pictures of Bella," Loftus gestured his hand to an area where there was food and drinks. They wouldn't let me eat anything. God forbid that I gain a pound in the next minute.

I asked Loftus when the question portion would come into play, but he told me that it wouldn't be until the last set.

It was… awkward, at first. I didn't know what to do; I had never done anything remotely like this before. What was I suppose to do? Should I smile? Or should I try to be all smoldering and sexy?

Luckily Loftus seemed to since my confusion and started directing. I first started by sitting in a big leather chair, and threw my legs up on the large wooden desk. He helped me angle my legs so that they looked a mile long and deadly in those heals.

It didn't take long before I got into it. Soon I was posing on the ladder against the shelf, giving the camera a sidewise glace while reading a book, and I even ended up lying on the desk. I had decided that in this set I would be a sexy librarian vixen.

Once Loftus decided that we had enough pictures for them to work with, I was rushed off to the dressing room; looking longingly at the food table.

Edward stood outside my dressing room not really answering my question on what he thought of how it went.

Tiffany attacked my hair by taking it down and curling it. I ended up with a cool 50's bouffant that went perfectly with the black one piece halter 50's bathing suit which I had fishnet stockings on and another pair of what Loftus had call "fuck me" shoes.

I loved this outfit, even if didn't really feel comfortable wearing this in front of 70 people. Once Tiffany was done with me I stepped out with a big smile on my face and spread my arms out while saying "tad-da".

Edward barely looked at me before walking off to the set.

I bit back the sting of rejection and fallowed Edward off to the set where Loftus made a huge spectacle of my arrival.

"Oh I love that blush," Loftus smiled. "It'll go great with the pink backdrop."

Although I had gained some confidence from the last session, this was a whole different set up. I didn't have any props, or any place to hide behind, or anything to lean on. This was me, and I was freaking out.

"Don't clam up on my now Bella dear," Loftus called to me from behind the camera.

"Are you going to start up the wind machine?" I asked while glaring at the large fan ahead of me.

"No, not at first. Tiffany would kill me if I messed up you hair so early." Loftus crouched down and leaned from side to side, looking for an angle. "Alright Bella, you are going to have to work with me here. You can't just stand there with your hands at your sides, and legs all stiff together."

I brought my hand together and started fidgeting, which earned a glare from Loftus.

"Ok," he sighed. "Think of the outfit you are in Bella. You look like a sexy 50's pinup girl. Back then they smiled for the camera, they posed; they were a different type of sexy then now."

With a deep breath I leaned on one hip and slightly crossed my leg in front of the other, placed both hands on my hips, and gave Loftus the most genuine smile I could muster.

"Better," Loftus started snapping away. "But work on that smile!"

I tried a variety of different poses then, but could still feel my smile being strained. Ok, think of something happy.

I glanced around the room and saw Edward with a blank expression on his face as his watched.

"No Bella," Loftus yelled as he dived around taking pictures from different angels. "Happy, not pain."

A memory popped up in my head. Edward and I on a road trip to Portland with the purpose that was heartbreaking to me, but the trip there was undeniably fun as we argued over music.

"Perfect Bella," Loftus cheered. "Keep that up, keep up the smiles."

Another memory of introducing Edward to the group; then an epic game of laser tag. Me buying Edward the piano, then hearing the songs he wrote for me. Edward making fun of me while I went out on the first set up date from Cullen Agency. Dancing with Edward for my birthday. Confronting Lauren. Edward standing up for me. Halloween. Thanksgiving. Christmas.

Even I wasn't dumb enough to not realize that pattern. What makes me happy?

Edward.

I'm not a complete idiot, I know I like Edward. More then friend. But things started getting weird between us, not when Edward started making money, but when I started having these confusing feelings. I have been ruining our friendship, and I will do whatever it takes to make it right.

"Alright let's stop," Loftus sighed. "I'm pretty sure we got more then enough pictures."

I straightened up and started walking back to the dressing room when Loftus stopped me.

"Are you alright doll?" he looked concern. It made me smile.

"I'm more then alright, after this next shoot I'll be able to eat," I winked.

"You were smiling just fine, but then out of no where you looked like you were in hurting."

"I was smiling," I argued softly.

"Just because I take pictures doesn't mean I don't see what going on bellow," Loftus raised an eyebrow.

I placed my hand on his arm and gave it a small squeeze. "That is why you are such an amazing photographer."

Loftus's concern frown quickly flipped into a brilliant smile. "I know, right?!"

Edward was talking to Tiffany when I walked into the dressing room. Tiffany dragged me away and started undoing my hair at an alarming speed. She really didn't have to do too much to it; it was already curled, but and now it cascaded down my back in relaxed ringlets

I gasped when I saw what I would be wearing for the final set which looked like a living room. There was no way… Something must be wrong… Rose and Alice must not know about _this_ outfit. They would _never_ have me wear this.

"What's wrong?" I heard Edward asked.

I shook my head, completely unsure as I slipped into my outfit. "It's my outfit…"

"It is… more then what the other outfits were like?" I could tell what he was implying.

"It is definitely more," I laughed uncomfortable. "There has to be a mistake, there is no way that this could possibly have been approved."

"Do you want me to get you a robe or a towel?" asked Edward. "You don't have to wear something you don't want, or you don't like..."

"What do you mean 'don't like'? I love it!"

I pushed back the curtain which I was changing behind to revile my outfit. "I want to keep it."

I had on a pair of light blue jeans that were not too tight, or loose, yet it showed that I had curves. I had on a light yellow tank top on, with a light blue long sleeved flannel shirt that I had unbuttoned and loose.

This is _exactly_ the type of outfit I would wear if Alice or Rose would let me. This is the kind of outfit where I felt comfortable with myself and yet I still felt sex in my own way.

"There is no way that the next outfit is this," I sighed as I looked in the mirror. I really did like this outfit.

"Oh there you are!" Tiffany yelled as she poked her head in. "You look great, now let's get out you out there."

"Are you sure this is what I'm supposed to wear? Jeans and a t-shit?"

"Yep," Tiffany nodded. "Now we need to get your ass out there!"

I smiled to myself when we approached the comforting set. The set looked like it belonged in a modern place but with a homey feel. The loveseat was a light gray, and the coffee table in front of it was a small round metallic table.

"So this is the question portion right?" I asked as I saw Meg come around with a digital recorder with her.

"Yep," she nodded. "You just sit your pretty little self down and answer my question while Loftus takes some candid pictures of you."

"Just pretend I'm not here," Loftus chipped in.

"That is nearly impossible to do," I laughed.

I walked over to the love seat and sat down while trying to ignore Loftus and the constant clicking sounds coming from him.

"Ok, question one," Meg pressed play on her recorder. "How long have you been writing?"

"I started writing stories in junior high for my entertainment, I must have been either 13 or 14," I recited. After being in this industry for any length of time you will realize all the questions are the same.

"Why write short stories when there is not really a market for them?" asked Meg, going straight for the kill.

"You say that there isn't a market for them, but I have had some success," I answered lightly. "But what got me writing short stories is that sometimes I want a quick read, a quick getaway with out having to wait months sometimes years for the next instilment in the series."

"So you will never write an actually novel," it was more of a statement.

"I didn't say that," I smiled when I really wanted to glare at Meg. "I would like to write a few novels but I need to prepare myself for that type of experience where it would require much more time and preparation."

Meg nodded then jotted a few notes.

"So tell me about your love life," Meg sneered at me. "I heard you have been linked to several guys: Mike Newton, Erick Yorkie, Tyler Crowely, Andrew Johnson."

I went back to my original argument from when I first went on those dates. "They were just friendly dinners."

"How about your most recent love connection, Jacob Black?"

I bit my lip, then immediately stopped when I remembered that Loftus was jumping all around the place taking my picture. I was unsure of how to answer without hurting Jacob or pissing of Rose. But why can't I just say 'he is my boyfriend'? I laughed dryly to myself when I recognized the answer.

Because he wasn't going to be my boyfriend much longer.

"No comment," I stated in the most neutral voice.

"No comment?" Meg raised an eyebrow, or at least raised it as high it could go with the Botox.

"No comment," I repeated.

Meg made another note on her paper.

"Alright, tell me about your friends."

I smiled genuinely with this. "I have been blessed with many good and close friends."

"Will you list them for me and how you met them?"

I took a breath. "Well Angela I would say is my oldest friend; we have been friends since high school."

"Angela…"

"Weber," I filled in. "Then there is Ben her boyfriend who we met in college. I met Rosalie Hale when I first interviewed for her to sign me on to Cullen Agency. She introduced me to Alice Brandon who is still my personal stylist. Those two are the most amazing and the best girlfriends anyone can ask for."

I smiled to myself as I thought about those two. With another breath I continued. "I met Emmett Cullen threw Rose, he is her boyfriend but also the son of Carlisle Cullen the owner and CEO of Cullen Agency. Threw Emmett we all met Jasper Whitlock who is now engaged to Alice. And then Jasper brought in Edward Masen," I smiled over at Edward and he responded in kind. "Edward and I also went to high school together, and he is my best friend and roommate."

"So you two were not friends in high school?" asked Meg.

I stiffened. "Why would you say that?"

"Because you referred to Angela as you oldest friend, and you also said that Jasper was the one to bring him into your little group."

Shit, she had been paying attention.

"Well, honestly no we were not friends in high school," I nodded. "But we have both grown since then and when we met we were friends instantly."

I saw Edward raise an eyebrow at me, but I just shrugged. There was no need to tell Meg every little detail.

Meg stepped back then looked over at me to Edward. "What do you do?" she asked him.

"I am also signed with Cullen Agency, but under their music department instead," Edward answered with a weary voice. "I play the piano and make compositions."

"He is going to be working with Andrew Lloyd Webber soon," I chipped in.

"Hmm…" Meg rubbed her chin as she examined a squirming Edward. "Tiffany!" She called out.

Tiffany popped out of no where as Meg continued directing. "I believe there are men's clothes in the back. Get him in a dark washed blue jeans any a blue t-shirt."

Tiffany grabbed Edward's hand and dragged him off; I thought I heard her muttering about getting his hair under control.

"You leave his hair alone!" Meg called out. "I want him all natural, he is doesn't need to be changed at all."

"What are you…?" was all I managed to get out. Loftus had stopped taking pictures and was getting new film for his camera while Meg was making some more notes on her notepad.

"Are we done?" I asked hopefully.

Meg glanced up from her notepad as if just realizing I was there. "No I want you to finish up this shoot with the two of you. He is a soon to be music star, not to mention he would be the sexiest thing to hit the entertainment industry. You don't mind sharing this with him, do you?"

"Not at all!" I exclaimed with genuine excitement. "This will be fun."

"Whoopee," Meg cheered sarcastically.

Edward came back about 40 minuets later looking casual in an outfit that almost matched mine. He looked confused and a little annoyed (although that is not new) as Tiffany dragged him out by the hand.

Edward sat next to me with a worried look. "You are not mad are you?" he asked tentatively. "This is your photo shoot; I don't have to be here."

"Yes you do," I smiled at him as I wrapped my arm around his arm. "If it was my choice, you would have been on the other two shoots."

Edward chuckled and it lifted and broke my heart at the same time realizing how much I had missed it. "I think my presence in the first set would not have helped you deliver that sexy librarian look." (I blushed) "And I also do not think that swim suits for men were not as attractive for men back in the 50's."

"Well I'm glad you're here now," I tightened my hold on Edward's arm as I heard the clicking sounds, alerting me that Loftus was back to work.

Meg went back to interview us, and this time I was a lot more relaxed. I joked around with Edward, and I even told Meg a few stories of how he makes a mess every time he cooks. Edward returned the favor by telling Meg how clumsy I am.

We talked about his career, and where he gets his inspiration from. I ducked my head as Edward explained that he writes about moments in time when he felt a peak in emotions, or he write song about he people he cares deeply for. Meg asked how many song he had written about me, making my blush like an idiot while it was captured by Loftus. Edward just smiled and said that I can inspire hundreds of songs from him, if only he had the time.

Oh that was _so_ not helping my crush.

Meg asked him about his love life and I immediately looked at Edward to see if he would mention Lauren by name.

"I was in a very serious relationship with a girl that I had been going out with since high school."

"Oh your high school sweetheart?" Meg gushed, and I was surprised to see such a girly part of her.

"I would not call her 'sweetheart'." Edward answered in a cool voice, but I could see his jaw clenching slightly.

"Things didn't end well then?" Meg's eyes sparkled. "You were wounded and now you are not sure how you can love again?"

"Things did not end on the greatest terms between us; on her account, not mine," Edward specified. "But it was my friendship with Jasper, Emmett, Rose, Alice, and especially with Bella is what helped me make full recovery."

Yeah, I felt a little smug there.

"You two are very close?" Meg asked without any trace of sarcasm.

"I would do anything to keep this friendship," I answered more to myself.

"I would do anything for Bella," Edward answered solemnly.

The interview and photo shoot ended soon after. I was able to convince Tiffany to let me keep my last outfit, and I exchanged my e-mail with Tiffany and Loftus. Although with Loftus I had to make clear it was not an offer for a three way between him, Edward, and me.

A taxi was called for us and the ride back home was silent for the two of us. But not because of the now usual tension, but because we were both lost in our own thoughts.

I could feel that I was loosing Edward, and I was trying to come up with as many solutions that I could come up with. I had tried to fix this problem we were having, but every time I think I have an answer, I go into the kitchen or living room, or sitting room and find Edward there in another one of his moods.

How can I focus on us getting better, when he is always there in a bad mood?

The taxi driver stopped in front of our building and I could slowly feel Edward's angry walls coming back up. The spell of our day together was dying down, and now I was back to reality. I was back to being trapped in my own apartment.

* * *

**So yeah, this chapter is very important because it will lead into the next chapter.**

**Let me tell you about the next chapter: when I came up with this story in my head, I thought of several scenes. Like when Bella recognizes Edward. When Bella starts going on set up dates. When Bella get serious with Jacob. And this next chapter.**

**This next chapter (23) is one of the main points in the story, and really I have been beyond excited to write it and I hope I have been leading up to it properly.**

**The next chapter is called: The Break**

**I hope you enjoyed and I will try to get this out ASAP :)**


	23. The Break

**I know, it was cruel to build you guys up last week like that, but hey I'm just giving you fair warning that this is a big one here.**

**I'm glad you all like Loftus, he is biased off of one of my friends. Only with the looks, he does not act like that at all and he is straight. But I had him read it, and he said, "Is that really what you think of my hair" haha**

**Alright you all are awesome.**

**Still no beta. I got a few offers, and i would/am going to take some of you up on your offer, but for this chapter i got behind and i just wanted to get it out there. For a beta i would need someone who can get it back to me in a day-ish. I understand that we all have life, but i'm trying to get these chapters out. So if you think you can beta quickly then let me know, and I'm sorry i don't write back right away, i'm horrible with writing back. Sorry :)**

**And I do not own twilight.**

* * *

Chapter 23- The Break

Bella POV

There are moments in time when you say, "things just went from bad to worse." Or at least different variations of that. And normally, in those moments, you are right; things really did just go from bad to worse. But sometimes things go from bad to worse, then things get even worse, and that is when you realize that your original "worse" was actually a walk in the park compared to the knew reality in the situation.

That is where I am at right now. I thought things between Edward and I were at our "worse", but that was only because I didn't know where we would be only three weeks since the photo shoot. We were at the real worse, where things between us were just getting unbearable.

I had originally told myself that things were taking a tern for the better; Edward and I were finally talking again instead of avoiding each other. But I was wrong, again. We were not really talking; no, talking is what two peaceful individuals do. Hell, even Roethlisberger and Fitzgerald I'm sure can hold a civil conversation together. No, talking was _not_ what we were doing.

Edward and I seemed to be fighting constantly. I didn't like; God, I hated it. I felt sick every time at the thought of having made him angry or sad. But I can't tell if he is sad, or really if he feels any other emotions beside anger and bitterness.

Crying myself to sleep was becoming a nightly ritual, and my eyes seemed to be permanently puffy. I was at least able to disguise my red eyes by drowning them out in water every morning.

Rose and Alice were both concern when I walked in the office looking like I had watched Titanic over and over the night before. They were still worried, but I wouldn't tell them anything. I didn't want them getting involve between me and Edward.

I just flat out lied to both Emmett and Jasper, I didn't like it, but I also didn't want to put Edward in an awkward place with them. So I just lied saying that my allergies were acting up, or that I had caught an Extreme Home Makeover marathon the night before.

I felt guilty for lying, and I felt like a bad friend for not confiding in Rose or Alice, but none of that compared to what I felt with my situation with Edward.

I had promised myself, and maybe not directly _to_ Edward, but I had also promised him that I would make things better, I would fix this.

But I can't.

I don't want to admit it, I can barely think it; but it is almost as if we are too far broken. That whatever it was that drove us apart can not be healed by any means that I am aware of, or by any means at all.

My arguments with Edward started out little at first. He would always instigate them in the beginning, by arguing about the smell of the food I was cooking, or that my high heals made too much noise when I walked. My personal favorite was when he said that I had messed up the position of his piano bench when I went to sit down on it one day.

As time went on, and my pent up frustration built, I finally started lashing back; yelling that he was not making himself useful around the place, or that he used up all the hot water in the morning. I hated to doing it, and I would catch myself bickering with Edward and try to stop myself. But it was as if Edward could feel what I was trying to do, and he would say something to only piss me off even more and I would get back to the argument at hand.

What stung though was the relieved, almost smug look Edward would get in his eyes whenever I was done yelling at him; as if he thrived from my anger with him.

How many times have I said or thought this? This was not how things between us were supposed to be. We were supposed to be friends now, get the chance that we didn't have in high school.

I was tired, God I am so tired! It didn't matter how many hours of sleep I would get, I was never really resting. I am now always on pins and needles waiting for Edward's next outburst, or mine. But I kept waking up, and getting dressed, and leaving my room just in hope that maybe today something would have clicked and all of this tension and stress would just go away.

This hurt, this anger, this regret that I had against him went against my very nature with my feelings towards Edward.

My realization of knowing that I liked him more then a friend quickly escalated to me realizing that I _really_ liked. I cared for him so much, and the way that Edward was lashing out at me carried a deeper sting then what I was prepared for. I had never felt this type of hurt before. It was new and stung me to my very core. But it hurt even more every time I would lash out at Edward. When I would yell at him for something so pointless and futile that I could literally feel my heart rip and my stomach turn within it's self.

Everything was going completely wrong, and it was all my fault and I can't make it better.

Sitting on my bed I stared off at nothing in particular. I just thought about calming myself before I went to the kitchen to get something to eat before I had a meeting with the girls.

I just had to go to the kitchen, nothing big, no arguments to start there…

With a false smile plastered on my face, I walked as quietly as I could to the kitchen while my eyes darted around looking for Edward.

He was sitting at his piano idly playing with the keys. His hair looked to be even more of a mess then normal and his clothes looked slightly disheveled with a gray hoody and a looser pair of jeans that were torn up at the ends; this was his normal look lately.

Edward lifted his head at me then went back to looking at the piano keys; that was about as much recognition I would get.

I hurried to the kitchen to make myself a pot of coffee and to put together some cereal before I had to leave. I managed to eat my breakfast and drink my coffee without any arguing. I took a deep breath of relief and as I exhaled I heard Edward walk into the kitchen.

"Oh perfect, what a nice little mess you are leaving me to clean up… again." Edward sneered sarcastically at me as he begrudgingly made his way to the sink.

"I'm not asking you to clean that for me Edward," I waved my hand at the empty bowl filled with water and coffee cup also filled with water in the sink, the only things in the sink.

"Well you are leaving right now aren't you?" Edward raised his eyebrow.

"Yes but…"

He cut me off. "And you are not going to take care of this right now, are you?"

"I'll get to it when I get home like I always do!" my patients were wearing thin.

"You are not the one who has to deal with this crap!" Edward raised his voice.

"Fuck it," I sighed. "Fine do the stupid dishes or don't, I'll do whatever is left there tonight." With that I turned away from Edward and felt my heart break a little more.

"Bella, did you hear me?"

I looked up and saw both Alice and Rose staring at me. I was so out of it that I couldn't even tell who had just asked me that.

"No," I didn't even try to deny it.

"Bella, you don't look so good," Alice gave me a sad smile.

"How is everything?" Rose asked, and I could tell she was asking about Edward.

I felt a drop on my hand and looked down. It was a tear; tears were rolling down my face and I felt nothing.

"Oh honey," Rose gasped as she rushed from around her desk to my side while Alice jumped out from her chair and occupied my other side.

"It's just going all wrong," I sobbed as I brought my hands to wipe away my tears.

I felt one of them stroke my hair while the other rubbed and patted my back.

"I'm sorry," I gasped, trying to contain my breathing. "I shouldn't… not your problem…I'm sorry."

"Don't give us any of that!" Alice gently scolded. "Tell us everything that happened."

I shook my head. I shouldn't tell them my problem. It was my own fault that somewhere along the way I fell for Edward, and that he could probably since that and was now therefore treating me like this because he it trying to show me just how much he doesn't like me. This was all on me.

"Thing's have just been a little stressful," I took a deep breath while I forced my tears to stop.

Neither Rose nor Alice looked convinced.

"I can't come up with an ending for this story I'm working on," I admitted, although that was not the cause of this breakdown. "You both know that Renee broke her leg yesterday while trying to learn how to skate board and she refuses for me to come and see her," I was stretching it there. Renee had indeed hurt herself while skate boarding, but it was nothing more then a few stitches and staying off her leg for a week or so.

"So I have just been really stressed," I repeated while keeping my stare at my impatient hands on my lap.

I heard Rose sigh, and I knew that they knew that although those may have been stressful, I had not actually admitted the cause.

"Well, at least you have something to look forward to," Alice smiled at me. I raised an eyebrow and let her continue. "Valentines Day, it's this Saturday."

A mix of a sob, laugh, and sigh escaped my lips, making me sound like I was going crazy.

"Oh no," I groaned. "I forgot, so that is why Jacob has been trying to get a hold of me this morning."

In the past three weeks I had been distancing myself from Jacob even more so. I should have just broken up with him, but to be honest I was a scared. I had never broken up with someone that I had been in an actual relationship with. That was no excuse. But the few times I would actually gain the courage to break it off, it would be as if he knew and would come up with a last minuet excuse for not meeting with me.

"Damn it Alice, you were suppose to give her happy thoughts," Rose hissed.

"Well I thought she would be happy to have a boyfriend for Valentines Day," Alice hissed right back.

"I won't have a boyfriend on Valentines Day," I interjected. "I have been putting this off long enough, and I wouldn't be fair to go through V day with Jake, and take whatever expensive present he tries to give me."

Both Alice and Rose stayed quiet, so I decided to just keep rambling on. "I'm sorry Rose, I know you would have liked the publicity of us going out on that oh so romantic day of clashing colors, but I need to break it off before then.

"And when I do break it off I need you to promise me to make sure that no one knows about this. I do not want any kind of media coming up to me, asking me how I have been dealing with the break up.

"Just please try to keep it on as much of the DL as you can do. And both of you can't tell anyone, not even Emmett or Jasper. I don't want either of them opening their big mouth and have Jacob find out I'm breaking up with him before I actually do."

By the end of my little rant I had tears back in my eyes. Why was I even crying now?! God, I can be such a chick sometimes.

"Don't worry about that," Rosalie whispered comfortingly. "No one will hear from you again until your book is published in the fall. Think of this as publicity vacation."

"And, we can go shopping and I'll let you buy whatever crappy T-shirts you like without me complaining." Alice smiled in an after thought and added in a kind voice, "As long as you don't wear them in public."

I chocked out a laugh and was finally able to stop the unwanted, yet persistent tears.

"You guys have any advice on how to break up with someone?"

The wind was cold and cruel as it whipped my heated face while I walked. It was only mid February and the cold hasn't let up in the slightest, but at least today it was not raining; although it wasn't sunny either.

I walked quickly so I could feel as much wind on my skin. I needed to cool down before I met up with Jake, I was still too mad at Edward. Normally by now my anger would be subsiding into guilt, but after this morning I was still beyond pissed to feel anything _but _anger.

I woke up earlier then I wanted to this Wednesday morning; I had more time to think about what I was planning on doing today for lunch. Today I was finally going to breakup with Jacob.

I felt sick to my stomach, but I knew it was just from nerves, and I just could not stop fidgeting. I wanted/needed to talk to someone other then Alice and Rose. They had spent the rest of the afternoon the day before going over exactly how to break up with Jake, and how to end it in good terms with each other. If I were to call them this morning I know I would get an earful of "just use the good old fashion, 'it's not you, it's me.'"

But I just wanted someone to hold my hand, or give me a hug and tell me it will be alright; that I am doing the right thing even if that meant hurting Jacob. I wanted my best friend to step up from whatever funk he has been in and not make me feel so uncomfortable that I can't go up to him and tell him what I'm doing.

Instead when I left the safe confines of my room I felt my body do two different things; my heart did the familiar flip flop in my chest just from the sight of Edward lying out on the couch, while my stomach sank when he looked at me as if my presence caused him physical pain.

I smiled at him, hopping that he would smile in return so I could collect some strength by seeing his crooked grin.

But instead he frowned and looked away, back at the TV which had some infomercial on. He hated infomercials. Edward use to complain every time they came on, and would find anything to distract himself until his show came back on. Oh God, now even infomercials are placed higher than me.

I grabbed some toast, my stomach was tied in knots and I knew I would never be able to actually eat anything until I had broken up with Jake. I must have been in a weird mood, or felt so guilty about breaking up with Jake that I felt like I deserved to get hurt as well today, because I decided to go sit with Edward and watch whatever he was watching.

He looked surprised at first when I came to sit by him, but after quickly recovering, he looked just flat out pissed. No "hey Bella," or "how's it going?" I didn't even get a grunt of recognition any more. All I got was a small glare before he went back to watching some special on the History channel.

"So what are your plans for today?" I asked in what I hoped was a cheerful voice.

Edward laughed dryly and answered while still watching the TV, "Have you giving up being a writer and decide to become my personal day planner now?"

I looked at my lap, and I felt heat rise in my cheeks from embarrassment. I use to be able to ask what his plans were.

"No, I was just wondering…" I trailed off when I realized he wasn't paying attention.

Edward let out a large sigh and pushed pause to turn over and look at me with a very aggravated expression. "What?"

I gulped and bit my lip. This was a bad idea.

Edward recognized my anxiousness and softened his expression a bit. "What?" he asked again in a slightly lighter tone.

"I miss you," I blurted out. I didn't come here with a plan, which was extremely stupid of me seeing as I have a tendency to say whatever is on my mind.

The line between Edward's brow relaxed and a pained smile came on his face. "I miss you too."

I let out a relived breath. I had almost expected him to laugh at me and tell me to get lost.

"I was thinking that we should go out," I offered. "Tomorrow night?"

Edward didn't answer at first, he just stared at me; studying my expression very carefully. He must not have liked what he saw as his eyes darkened and the line came back to form a hard expression.

"Yeah, sounds good," Edward replied in a dead tone.

Anger instantly replaced my uneasiness.

"Well you don't have to sound so happy about it," I snapped.

"What do you want me to say?" he answered just as edgy. "'Oh Bella, thank you so much for honoring me with your presence!'" His voice took on a higher more mocking tone.

"No," I nearly growled. "But the least you can do is look just the slightest bit excited, seeing as you haven't spent any time with you best friend in weeks."

Edward finally looked at me with a cold expression. "I don't know what you are talking about," his voice was equally frosty. "I saw Jasper yesterday."

I took a quick pained breath.

That hurt.

It hurt more then his annoyed looks, more then his angry words, and even more then when he called me a whore. Because through all of that I knew that between this rough patch we still had our friendship, we were still ok, because he was my best friend, I was his best friend; we were best friends.

I recognized that a person can have more then one best friend; hell I have seven. But with his comment I now see that I'm no longer part of the people he holds close to his heart.

I stood up, not even looking at him let alone speaking to him, and I walked out the door. Luckily I already had my purse ready to go by the door so I wouldn't have to spend any more time in that place also know as my home.

So that is where I am now, walking in the unforgiving cold, hopping that the almost freezing temperature would help cool the rage within. And by the tears stinging my eyes, I could tell that it was not working.

Thankfully I left earlier then I had planned so I had some time to walk around the block a few times to cool down before meeting up with Jacob.

After my fourth time around, my anger subsided and a wave of nausea kicked in. How am I supposed to break up with Jake? Right. It's not you, it's me. It's not you, it's me. It's not you, it's me.

"It's not me, it's you," I blurted out. Shit, that wasn't right.

Jake showed up to the restaurant not long after I had built up the courage to go sit down. By the look in his eye I could tell he knew what I was about to do, so I decided to get it out in the open before we ordered our food and had to have an awkward sit down.

What we both were not expecting was that line, but once I said them I could tell they were true, to an extent.

"It's also me," I added firmly. "Jake, we both knew this was never going to last."

Jake grunted and crossed his arms, "It could have if it wasn't for _certain_ people always sticking their damn nose in our business."

"I know Alice and Rose tend to mettle in my personal life sometimes, but I think they were really good at stay out of this." My two best friends have always felt like they know what is best for me, and many times they were right, but I was surprised at how well they managed to stay out of Jake's and my relationship.

"That was not who I was referring to," Jake rolled his eyes. When I didn't say anything Jake straightened and his voice rose as well. "Oh come on! Are you telling me that this has _nothing _to do with Edward?"

"No!" Not entirely. Edward did play a part of why I was breaking up with Jacob, but I just was not sure how large of a part.

"Jacob," I started calmly. "It was fun being with you, it really was. It can't be healthy pretending that we can make this work. I'm not going to deny it, but yeah your right; Edward didn't help out. But even if he wasn't here we still wouldn't last. We don't agree on things. You want us go walk whatever red carpet event is coming up, and I just want to live my life and write. Just take it for what is was Jake."

Jacob sighted, looked down, and nodded.

Wow, I'm good at this breakup thing.

"I just can't help but wonder what would have happened between us if _he_ wasn't in the middle of everything," Jacob thought out loud.

"Well we probably would have kept going out for a few more months, but you wouldn't have had sex for at _least_ four more months and even that wasn't a guarantee," I smiled so he knew I was trying to keep this light.

Jake threw his head back and laughed. "You're right, we would never have worked."

I reached over to grab his hand and gave a gentle squeeze.

"Goodbye Jake," I smiled at him. "I hope you find someone amazing."

Jake stood up to pull me out of my chair and gave me a tight hug, "Bye Bella, I hope- oh shit!" I pulled back to see what was wrong.

"We can't even have break up sex!" he pouted.

I laughed and gave him one last hug and our final sets of goodbyes before walking out of the restaurant. I maybe newly single, but my heart I'm recognizing has been taken for quite some time.

I called up Rose and Alice to have celebratory drink with them that night, on how well my breakup went. At least that is what I told them. In reality I was too busy obsessing about what my breakup with Jake, meant to Edward.

A very large part of me was hopping, wishing, praying that somehow me breaking up with Jacob meant things getting better for me and Edward. I have always known that Edward hated Jacob, although I never really figure out why.

Maybe somehow this will fix Edward's new attitude.

So instead of seeing if my theory was correct, I went out drinking with Rose and Alice to put off my last hope

I hadn't seen Edward at all the next day until around four in the afternoon when he just popped out of no where and asked me what time I wanted to leave for dinner.

I was stunned. The last time we talk… well I didn't want to think too much about that or I just might storm out of here again.

"I didn't know you still wanted to go out," I answered.

He ignored me. "I want to go to this sushi place in downtown, if that is alright with you?"

I nodded my head.

"Can you be ready to go by eight?" he asked as he started to walk back to his room.

I nodded again.

He closed his door.

By eight, I was sitting on a stool by the kitchen counter, wondering if it would be bad to start drinking alone. Instead of opening a new bottle of wine I smoothed out my dress over and over again, so I could do something with my hands instead.

I was wearing a nice fitted knee length black knitted dress, with my hair tucked up in a lose bun, and a black knee length boots that match my purse. It took me over five different outfits before finally deciding on this one. The realistic side of me was saying that this was a dinner between two… barley friends. But the idiot side kept reminding me that I was _single_!

I heard Edward, and I bit the inside of my mouth so I could suppress whatever gasp I knew I would do when I turned to see him.

Yep, I needed to bight harder.

He looked very good in his black dress up pants, and his dark green shirt that made his eyes so much more intense that I was starting to feel the affect of the wine I never drank.

_I'm single! Single! Single!_ Sang the voice in my head.

**Yeah, but just because **_**I'm**_** now single, doesn't mean **_**he**_** would want me.** I countered.

What was wrong with me? I break up with Jake hardly even 24 hours ago, and now I'm wondering if I could move on to Edward. I needed to focus on our friendship, once that was fixed, then maybe…

He glanced at me quickly up and down while he fastened his watch. "Ready?" he asked.  
I looked down and nodded while I fallowed him out.

Maybe I was becoming vain, or just spoiled. But Edward use to tell me I looked good, even on the day I knew I looked like crap. He always complimented me. So it was a blow to the girl in me that like him when he didn't say anything about how I looked; after I spent the past three hours getting ready just for him.

The car ride to the restaurant was silent, but I hardly expected it to be any different. We didn't talk anymore. Instead I spent the car ride bighting my lip so I could focus on that pain, instead of the one in my heart.

Pissed Edward, happy Edward; he was still Edward which meant he was still a gentleman. He opened my car door for me, along with the door to the restaurant. He guided me as we fallowed the hostess to our table, although I noticed that he managed to do that without touching me; and he held my chair out for me.

_**Just tell him! Tell him you broke up with Jake!**_ Both my sensible and crazy side were cheering to me.

Every time I would open my mouth to tell him, I would catch the expression on his face. It was teater tottering between anger and pain. That seemed to be like the only thing he felt when he was around me.

Instead I tried some other topics.

"Where did you find this place?" I hope I kept my voice from shaking.

"I heard about it," he answered without looking at me.

"What have you been up to?"

"Recording."

"How is recoding going?"

"Fine."

"What are you getting?"

"Sushi, what else?"

"It's crazy how cold it is lately, right?"

"Are we playing 20 questions or something?" sighed Edward.

I felt like a child. "No."

We went back to eating, and back to not talking. I thought about why things between us were so tense. It seemed like we never really had a chance to just take a breather from each other, there was always one of us hanging around somewhere in the apartment. As large as the apartment was, it always felt too small between the two of us. Sometimes the best thing a friendship needs is space.

I felt like I wasn't getting enough air as I fallowed Edward back to his car. There was a pressure on my chest and an unexpected feeling of dread.

We spoke a little more over dinner, but not enough to give me an opening to tell him about Jacob. We talked just enough so that it was clear that we both made an effort, but clearly he was just sick of me.

"So this was nice," the sarcasm in his voice was clearly evident.

We had just stepped onto the elevator to head up to the apartment; I've never dreaded going up to the apartment more then I do now.

"It would have actually been a nice evening if you had made an effort," I kept my voice even. I really did not want this to become another yelling match.

Edward scoffed. "I'm sorry, but I thought that getting ready, taking you out, and buying you dinner was making an effort."

"It's pointless if you barely even talk to me," I crossed my arms over my chest and counted the floors we passed.

"I never thought you were one of those annoying girls who needs to fill silence with useless chatter," Edward looked just as tense; I could even tell he was grinding his teeth together.

"I have never been like that and you know it," I took a breath as the doors opened to the hallway. "I don't care about silence, but that dinner was anything but silent."

"I didn't realize I was talking," Edward pulled out his keys.

"Oh my God!" I groaned with frustration. "It is now impossible for you to say anything without sounding like a prick?"

"Apparently not," he whispered more to himself.

"Edward, what's wrong with you?" we both were in the apartment now, but I stood in the foyer while he had stepped into the living room.

He didn't answer; instead he just gave me a hard look.

"What's wrong with you, with us?" Fucking emotional tears, they get in the way every time and made me look like a totally over emotional girl. "I thought we were friends!"

I thought he wasn't going to answer again so I started to walk past him, until I heard him clearly whisper, "God, you are just as annoying as you were in high school."

I had a flashback of me in Edward's house in Forks surrounded by people laughing at me; while I cried to Edward asking him if we were friends.

"Get out," I breathed, hardly audible to me.

"What?" Edward asked.

I had my back to him, so I slowly turned around. Surprisingly I wasn't crying. But really I think my pain was past the point of tears.

"Get out," I shook my head. "You need to move out. You can afford a place for yourself now, and it should be pretty easy for you to find a good apartment. But you need to move out… I can't … We can't keep being friends if you live here. It's killing us Edward."

"You don't want to be my friend any more," he looked so young when he asked that.

"No, no, no," I rushed over to his side to put a hand on his arm. "That is not what I'm saying. I mean is that if you and I still want to have a chance of being friends again, then you need to move out. We see each other too much. And while in normal friendships the people would just go back to their own home and regroup, we live together and never have a chance to regroup."

Edward was still for a while before he shook my hand off. "I hear what you are trying to say."

His voice was much darker and it scared me.

"This is just finally your way of getting me out," Edward glared at the floor. I opened my mouth to protest but he cut me off. "I get what you are trying to do, but the least you can do is be honest about it."

"Edward that's not fair, you are twisting my words and coming up with your own conclusion!" Oh, here come back the tears. "I want you… I need to keep you in my life, but the only way to do that would be for you to move out. Please see that."

"All I see is you telling me to leave," Edward walked to his room and I could distinctly hear the door lock for the first time in years.

I woke up early on Friday hopping that Edward and I would be able to actually talk, but he wasn't in the apartment. I decided that I would camp out in the living room until he came home. Whenever I needed to use the restroom I made sure I left my bedroom door open, and that it was the fastest pee in history.

Around one in the morning, I fell asleep and he still hadn't come home. I had called him a few times, but was unsure what to leave as a voice message other than letting him know I was worried about him.

At two thirty in the morning I woke up to the sound of Edward's door to his room closing. At least he was safe. I wanted to go talk to him, but I didn't know what to say. With a defeated sigh I made my way to my room for a night of nightmares.

Many of my dreams consisted of me being trapped in my room while I pounded on the door, screaming that someone let me out. I needed to get out; I needed to go help Edward. But then I could hear his laughing and I realized that Edward was the one locking me in. His laugh wasn't his laugh though. This was not my Edward, this was something else.

Another dream was me running through a home that loosely resembled the one Edward lived in with his parents in Forks. There were doors everywhere, completely unrealistic so I knew that this was a dream. I was still frantic though. I had to get there in time and stop Edward from doing whatever he was doing. I wasn't sure what, but I could hear heavy grunting noises.

I woke up in a gasp and in a cold sweat; I could still hear the grunts. I jumped out of bed and almost tripped on the material of my lavender pajama pants. Running out of my room, I collided with a large body which quickly reached out and stabled me.

Looking up, I was met with the most heartbreaking pair of green eyes that I have ever seen.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," Edward's voice lost the callous that had been coating it since the start of the New Year. He sounded like Edward, my Edward, only much sadder then anything I have ever heard form him.

"What are you doing?" my voice, however, had a more panic edge to it.

Edward ran a hand through his unkempt hair. "Moving out. You said you wanted me gone, so I'm going."

"Edward, I didn't say I wanted you gone," I whispered. "Move out yes, we need space from each other until we can work this out, but not gone; not the way you are making it sound… so permanent."

I was looking down at the floor now, I could see that he was wearing a pair of his more worn blue jeans.

I felt his hand cup my chin to pull my face up. I suppressed as gasp when I looked up to find him much closer then I had expected. I could smell him, feel him, and God I wanted him.

"Bella, I have been crueler to you and placed you in uncomfortable situations more then you know," his thumb stroked my cheek; he was whipping away the silent tears. "I was being completely selfish by staying here knowing that I was hurting you."

"No," I squeaked out franticly. "No, I'm sorry. I take it back, please don't go. You can live here. I'm sorry."

Edward shook his head. "You say that now, but what happens a week from now when I go and piss you off again? It's better if I leave. I've hurt you too much."

"Fine then, but don't leave me," I grabbed on to the front of his shirt. I recognized it as one of his more casual simple black T shirt.

"You're right, it's probably better if you move out now, but don't leave me," I gasped out trying to fight back a sob. He knew what I meant by begging him not to leave me. I was pleading with him not to leave this friendship.

I buried my face in his chest while I bit my lip to the point where I could start to taste some blood.

I felt him place his hands on my shoulders, and for a moment I thought he was going to hug me and tell me that we would work it out. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled his body to me. I felt his hand tighten on my shoulder then gently pushed me away.

I could hear my heart break. It was a loud cracking sound that felt much worse then it sounded. There was a weight on my lungs and suddenly it didn't matter how much I was panting I wasn't getting any air. My air, my life was standing in front of me and he just pushed me away.

"I found a place yesterday and their willing to let me start living there today," Edward wasn't looking at me. "It's furnished, which is good since I don't own any furniture; this stuff is all yours." He waved a hand around.

I blinked back my tears as rapidly as they came. I needed to see him because this could not be happening.

"I'm all packed up," he glanced by the front door and I saw two suitcases, the rest must already be in his car.

"What about your piano?" I wanted to slap myself for asking that, but it was the only thing that came out of my mouth.

"It's not mine Bella," he looked in the piano's direction. "But thank you though, for letting me have time with it."

"I got it for you," I kept going. "It's yours, which means you can't leave yet. You have to take it with you."

I would have said the same thing about the flat screen TV if it would have meant he would stay a little longer so I could try to convince him that we could still be friends.

Edward dug in his pocket and pulled out his house key, handing it back to me. "Goodbye Bella, and I'm sorry for everything."

"No!" I allowed myself to sob completely now, not able to hold back anymore. "Edward, I still want to be your friend. We can still be friends! Please Edward, _please _don't leave me. Please don't go!"

My whole body was shaking as I gasped for air. I kept my gaze at him the entire time, willing him to tell me that everything would be better; that we could still be friend.

Edward looked at me for a long time without saying anything. I thought that maybe I had somehow gotten through to him.

"Goodbye," Edward reached down and grabbed his luggage and left without looking back at me.

I heard the door slam and I fell to my knees, unable to hold myself up as I sobbed uncontrollably. Edward was gone. He didn't want me to be in his life anymore. I am broken. And I am completely, irrevocably, in love with him.

What a perfect time to figure that out, I thought bitterly. It is Valentines day after all.

I continued to cry on the floor, until I didn't have any tears left and I had just wrapped myself in a ball.

I am in love with Edward. And he is gone.

Things just went from bad to worse, again.

* * *

**So, I'm thinking that you guys might be a tab bit angry at me. But come on, we have all seen the build up. This was going to happen.**

**And I know that everyone loves Edward, but even you guys can't pin this all on Bella. Give the girl a break here, the guy was a complete jerk.**

**As to why Edward has been such a prick, I was hopping that I had showed his mental state in the last chapter it was his POV. On New Years he just kind of lost it, and started his down hill spiral. But when I do his POV it will show why he does what he does.**

**Remember I promised you a happy ending. AND I'm going to tell you guys something else. You will get a few (1,2,3, I'm not telling) chapters after Bella and Edward get together. I hope by now you guys know me well enough to know that I can't handle sad stuff for too long. I need happy and comedy. But I'm just not going to tell you how long until we get there.**

**30 is the last chapter so, it can go so many ways.**

**It had to happen, but remember there is light at the end of the tunnel.**

**The next chapter is called: _Misery for one._**

**It will be in Edward's POV.**

**I hope you enjoyed, and please don't hate me :)**


	24. Misery for One

**Sorry. I know this had been a LONG ass time, but several things happened. 1. I needed to take a slight break from this story and come back with a fresh mind (don't worry, I will not be doing that again) 2. Found out my grandma has a tumor that is cancers and she is having surgery today, shout out to my grandma. 3. I got sick.**

**Lame excuses I know, but I will be getting this out faster. And I plan to have this done before my summer vacation starts. So that will be in May.**

**I have a new Beta, thank you to all that have offered, but she is REALLLY fast to write me back and she did a whole bunch of edits so you will have a smooth read through.**

**Drum roll please.... my new beta is: _Scorpio11_**

**Yayayayaya thank you for Betaing.**

**And now the chapter.**

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

Chapter 24- Misery for One

Edward POV

I was a jackass.

No, that does not seem to be a good enough word. I was a bastard.

Dirt.

Shit bag.

Fucking king of all that is asshole-ness.

I lost it. I had lost that sensible part of my brain after New Year. It was as if I had gone slightly crazy. All I remember was seeing was Bella and Jacob together, and I lost it. I gave up hope, I gave up my cause; I just fucking gave up.

I didn't want to hurt Bella so I just stopped talking to her. I could feel the air around us become heavy, and thinking back on it, I could see that things were starting to go down hill quickly, I just didn't want to hear how happy she was with Jacob, or have her call me out on acting so distant. I made the atmosphere of the apartment unwelcoming, but I couldn't handle the situation anymore.

How the fuck was I supposed to go on with day to day life knowing that my efforts were wasted, that no matter how fucking hard I tried Bella would never realize my feelings for her, let alone return them.

Rosalie and Alice would call me frequently and give me endless pep talks, but I didn't have any fight left in me. Emmett told me I just needed to keep a smile on my face, and act like nothing is wrong.

Yes, like that would be the answer to all my problems; a fucking smile. Ok Emmett, let's see you smile every time Rose kisses another man you absolutely hate. Let's see you keep a straight face every time you know Rose has gone to that man's apartment, and you can just imagine all of the great shit they must be doing. But that's ok, as long as I kept up that fucking smile!

As much as I just _loved_ Emmett's advice, it was Jasper's advice that was just the icing on the cake.

Have patience, it will take time.

Time. Time is my enemy, because it's this "time" thing that is making me go slowly insane. With each second that ticks away, each waking moment that Bella belongs to someone else, I continue to die inside.

Time is what I am loosing. It is what mocks me everyday and reminds me that another day has gone by watching my love with another man.

So tell me, Jasper, how much more time do I have to spend living day in and day out, making sure that I don't accidentally caress Bella's face, or make the fatal mistake of kissing her, or having to suppress my words each time I want to tell her I love her…

It was the moments when she would do something as simple as smiling because she was able to open the jar of jam all by herself, or when dew from a heavy mist in the city lingered in her hair making it shine with light, those were the moments when I so desperately wished that I could wrap her in my arms and tell her how much I loved her, and shower her with my kisses and caresses.

But I couldn't do that. Because she was with someone else. Because I would scare her away. Because she was not in love with me.

So I simply didn't talk to her. It was easier for me to get through the day. It was selfish of me, and I could see the effect it had on Bella. She became cautious around me, and she started hiding out in her room more often just like when I first moved in. It was like we were back to the beginning when I had to make a proper apology and stick to with my determination to make things better.

I had apologized, but my determination died with my hope.

I was surprised when she asked me to go to her photo shoot with her. Yet when she began rambling about how we would spend the day together, I couldn't help but say yes. And I wanted to enjoy the day, I really did. However, I wanted to be able to go to the photo shoot, and they asked me who I was, I wanted to say I was her boyfriend and not just her roommate.

I could tell Bella was trying to pull out all the stops by being funny and trying to get me to go along with her, so I attempted to be like how I use to be, but it was hard. I was getting so caught up just being with Bella that when we finally arrived at the photo shoot, I was forced back to the reality of just being the friend. Even worse was having that dried up woman and a teenaged boy hitting on me while I watched Bella transform into these different sex kittens.

Part of me wanted to run in front of the camera and cover her. The hair on my arms and the back of my neck started to stand on end as I thought about the thousands of boys who would be sneaking into their sister's room to cut out the page with Bella just so they could tape it in their room and…

Too much.

I don't think Loftus knew exactly how close I was to destroying his camera and permanently crippling his hand so that he could never take another photo again.

This raw anger in me was competing with another raw side of me. This animal in me wanted to toss Bella over my shoulder caveman style and rush her to the dressing, while telling anyone who got in my way to 'fuck off'.

I don't think Bella knew exactly how close she was to having sex that afternoon.

What definitely cooled me down was their decision to have me in the photo shoot right along with Bella. I was still trying to decide how I felt about the fact that Bella had answered "no comment" when she was asked about Jacob, yet she was willing to talk about me…

I had to admit that I was fooling myself while sitting next to Bella. In those few moments I was able to convince myself that we were a couple on a photo shoot, talking about each other's flaws, and why we loved them so much. I was able to hold her hand, but I knew I couldn't kiss her because she would blush like crazy if they got a picture like that to put inside a magazine.

That was my reasoning. It was not because we are not really in love, not because I was still trying to hide my feelings, but because she would blush. When Meg asked us if we were close I was harshly brought back to reality when Bella answered that she would do anything for this "friendship", not relationship.

And I answered that I would so anything for Bella which was true, yet a complete lie. If I was really willing to do anything for Bella, I would be able to smile for her and laugh with her. I couldn't bring myself to do that.

I was lying to myself and to Bella because I was weak, and that thought was what intensified my need to kill that friendship. If she hated me as much as I hated myself, then in some twisted way it would be alright. Then we would be on the same level with each other and be connected again.

So every time I was able to get her mad enough so that she would snap at me, I felt this odd numb feeling which I took willingly since it was the closest thing to happiness I was going to get.

On my really crazy days I was able to once again fool myself into believing that we were a couple, an old married couple bickering like we always had through our long lives together. I began fighting with her more so that I could get that high. She was like my own personal brand of heroin; nothing good was coming out of it except a high that was able to keep me going until my need for another fix.

I was still so angry with her for saying that she would do anything for out "_friendship_", our fucking he's-just-like-a-brother-to-me kind of friendship. I was still so fucking pissed off with her for using the "friend" word that I pushed her to the point of breaking. My actions were yelling at her, "If you'll do anything for this fucking friendship then put with this shit now!"

I had long since died inside, but at this point my heart was just rotting.

I pushed and I pushed on the night we went out to dinner until she was standing there crying in front of me, asking me what was wrong with us. I wanted to kiss her tears away, and tell her that nothing was wrong with _us,_ but there was something desperately wrong with _me_. But I couldn't kiss her because she was not mine. She already had a boyfriend to make her feel better every time I hurt her like this.

So instead of telling her it was all going to be better I did the one thing that would finally her away. I mocked her about high school and the party.

Three things broke that night. The first was our friendship, and as much as I had hated and ridiculed it, I truly didn't want to see it end. The second was Bella. I had finally broken her determination for us to remain friends. And third, seeing her broken broke me.

It removed that weight I had been under. For the first time since New Years I felt like I was able to breathe again only to start hyperventilating because I could clearly see that I was loosing Bella.

She said that she still wanted to be friends, but that she just wanted me to move out. I could see where this was going. I would move out, we would rarely see each other, and on the occasions that we did no more the three words would pass between us.

I was going to move out, and Bella and I would be separated, but in that time apart I decided that I was going to work on myself. When I saw Bella again I was not going to be this weak broken Edward she remembers. I will enter her life as a stronger man, a man who is worthy of standing by her side.

So the morning I moved out while she was crying and begging me to stay I was so tempted to, but I knew that I if did we would go back to being the way we were. This was true even if we tried to remain friends after I moved out so instead I ended it. I said goodbye leaving her to think that it was the end of us. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. All I knew was that we both needed to heal from everything I had put us through.

This is how I got to be where I am now, sitting on a nice couch that I was too afraid to get dirty by putting my feet on it in an apartment that was fully furnished by some old man, trying to come up with a plan on how to recover.

Finding this place was not hard, and it was cheep as hell. Sure the place was no where near as big or as nice or as homey as Bella's apartment, but it was only a few blocks away from Cullen Agency, and the old man was more then willing to let me start living here the day after I signed the papers.

For the first week or so I just sat on the couch ordering take out, not really paying attention to the television I had on just for noise. I knew the first step to being better was to recognize everything I did wrong. So I spent that time remembering every time I hurt her from the very beginning, high school even before the party.

It was not a fun time. Not that I was expecting it to be fun, but trying to mentally relive every time you messed up is not exactly a walk in the park.

Emmett and Jasper had stopped by. I think their intent was to kick my ass, but after one look at me they just patted my shoulder and said everything would work out. Actually, Jasper told me everything would work out; Emmett really did punch my shoulder and told me to "fix this shit."

Rosalie and Alice also stopped by, but before I could apologize to them, they apologized to me, telling me that they should have never stuck their noses in between me and Bella. Alice was in tears, and Rose was staring me down trying to find the hidden anger. Alice kept sobbing until she was finally able to regain enough control to ask me to behave when I saw Bella at the wedding. She told me she had asked the same of Bella.

I asked them how Bella was, but when Alice got this excited look on her face Rose pinched her sides. Before Alice could complain, Rose started dragging her out of the apartment saying that they had to go somewhere.

I hate to sound vain, but sitting there and reflecting did inspire a number of new songs filled with love and loss that Emmett and Carlisle both loved. They said they could feel the pain clearly, and surprisingly enough, a few times Emmett was able to pinpoint which song went with which painful moment.

There were also a few loves song where I allowed myself to relive Beautiful Bella moments as I had called them; moments that even thinking about them made me fall in love with her all over again.

Another morning of waking up in this bed, it's not really my bed, or my sheets, or my TV, or my alarm clock, but this is my reality now.

It had been a little over three weeks since I left Bella. In those three weeks I have been reminiscing, not every waking moment (I would die if I spent every second thinking about all of the wrong I did), but I did spend almost all of my time thinking about Bella, and what I need to do to make myself a better man. The list was short because it really only consisted of one thing: Stop being an ass.

How does one make oneself better? I have a good education so I don't need to go out and get a degree. I have a good career so it's not like I'm lazy, I am not an alcoholic or junkie who needs to go into rehab. On paper I sound pretty good. But in reality there are a lot of things I need to work on.

And I have no idea on how.

I got out shower when the water started to get cold, and it was a lot sooner than what I had grown used to this past year. The bathroom was the same size as the one I had in Bella's apartment, but this is the master bathroom. This place had nice appliances, but none of them were as sleek and high tech as the ones Bella had recently upgraded in her place.

My new apartment had the basics; a living room, kitchen/dinning room, and a bedroom with an attached bathroom. Everything looked and smelled like it belonged to the old man who owns it. The main reason why I had ended up going with this place, other then the fact he was willing to let me start living here the next day, was because of the couch and TV, both of which are a man's dream come true.

The couch was really where I slept most nights. It was comfortable and big enough to have two Emmett's. The TV was bigger then Bella's and the surround sound was just as nice as hers. This is where I had spent most of my three weeks.

I had just finished my cereal as I made my way back to my new sanctuary when my cell phone started ringing. I cursed at myself for forgetting it in the kitchen and ran a hand through my damp unruly hair.

"Hey Emmett," I answered after looking at the caller ID.

"Well someone sounds a little more alive this morning," Emmett responded with his usual lightheartedness.

"Yeah, my reflection time has officially come to an end. I'm ready to get back on my feet and become a better man."

"How the hell are you going to do that?"

"No fucking idea," I answered honestly while Emmett laughed. "Probably just try not to screw up so much."

"Well I have an idea for you if you are interested," Emmett switched to his business voice which was a little lower and much more serious.

"Let's hear it."

"Well, incase you forgotten, your appointment with Andrew Lloyd Webber is in two weeks."

Like I could have forgotten.

"You have written a lot of new pieces, and you said you already picked out the one you want to show him; but the new stuff you have written is great too! Everything you write is great."

"Aw Emmett, you're making me blush," I laughed sarcastically.

"Shut the fuck up, and hear me out," Emmett laughed back. "I'm just saying that you've got a lot of good shit, and maybe you should finally start working on your first CD."

I didn't have a witty response to that. Instead I just kind of stood there with my mouth opening and closing over and over again in a fantastic impression of a gold fish.

"Not such a smart ass now, are you?" Emmett boomed.

"Emmett, that would be… I mean really… wow… you think I'm ready?"

"Like I said, you came to us with a bunch of good songs, but this break thing between you and… you know who…"

Emmett had grown used to not saying Bella's name around of me. He said that my facial expression always looked like I just got shot.

"Well the new stuff you've written is more then amazing, it's what's going to bring classical music back."

I stood there with my mouth open, still in shock.

"When should I come in?" I finally asked.

"Come on over right now. I'll meet you in the lobby, and I'll have a driver pick us up and take us to the recording studio."

I grabbed a loose dark maroon shirt and a pair of comfortable jeans and had a five second debate as to whether I should even think about trying to comb my hair. If there was even a possibility of seeing Bella then I would try to look like the man I want to be.

Ten minuets and many failed attempts later, I was running down the block to the agency to meet up with an aggravated Emmett.

"You're late man." Emmett guided me to a parked car with tinted windows.

I turned my head to look back at the building. "Sorry… I was looking… I mean… hair."

Emmett sighed as we got in the car. "She's not here," he whispered.

"Who?" I slammed the car door.

"Bella," Emmett leaned forward and briefly explained to the driver where he should take us. "She's been spending a lot of time in her apartment."

A new wave of nauseating guilt hit me. She was hurting. I had assumed that after the initial loss, she would be strong without me, that she would go on with life. I didn't think that I had that much of an impact in her life that she would be this affected by my leaving. It initially had been her idea for me to move. She was always the strong one, the stable one, the better one.

Alright, right there is a way to improve myself: I can't be so selfish. When I review all the times I hurt Bella, how many time did I say "I" or "me" or "myself"? I think about Bella, but do I ever really consider her the way I should.

I need to think about being there for her, about her feelings, and how I can help make her feel better.

Look at that; I'm growing.

The car ride to the music studio was quiet. Once we pulled up Emmett patted my back and leaned closer so the driver couldn't hear him. "Are you alright?"

We walked into the first door on the right and saw a decent sized room with three men sitting in front of a large desk filled with buttons, knobs, and other things I couldn't identify. Behind the desk was a soundproof window that showed another room with scarlet colored walls and a single black grand piano sitting in the middle of it.

I took off my jacket and tossed it onto the couch that rested against the wall beside me. "Yeah, I'm going to be better." Then I smiled a hopeful smile, the first one this year.

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**OK so this chapter was a hard one to write only because the story does not go forward as much as I would have liked, but what was said needed to be said, that's why it's pretty short.**

**I hope you all now get where Edward is coming from. He was in a really weird place, but now he just wants to be a better man for Bella.**

**Oh by the way, if you guys want to know my status, or how the story and chapters are comming along, I have a Twitter and my user ID is tbjac89, or my full name Jacqueline Sahlin.**

**Next chapter will be some in Bella POV and some in Jasper's.**

**It is called: Jasper's Confession**

**Thank you!**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	25. Jasper's Confession

**I AM SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**But life happens. If you fallow me on Twitter (tbjac89) then you can updates on what's going on.**

**But people we only have 4 more chapter left!!! And you guys all rock, i love you!!!**

**So here we go!!!**

**I do not own Twilight and my Beta _Scorpio11_ kicks ask!!!!**

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Chapter 25- Jasper's Confession

Bella POV

_He ran into the room, desperately looking for the woman who he just now realized how much he loved. As if destiny was playing her fine tune, she saw him run into the room and their eyes met.. While he looked relieved, she looked almost panic stricken, yet it was clear that she still had a spot for him in her heart. _

_Music played around them with the mixed sound of everyone's laughter and hope for the new years. They stared at each other for a few painful seconds, both wanting to go the other, yet both held back by their own issues._

_But the way she looked all dressed up in her beautiful black dress, and her hair all curled and perfect, he couldn't help but put his own pride aside and make the first step in her direction. _

_As he made his way through the crowd, a determined look on his face, she took a deep breath to regain her composure and lifted her head. He had hurt her the last time they met face to face, and she would not fall apart like she did then._

_With one last final step he stood in front of her and dove straight into his speech._

_"I've been doing a lot of thinking," he spoke quickly and slightly out of break. "And the thing is, I love you."_

_"What?" cocked her head to the side, more angry then confused._

_"I love you," he repeated again, this time more certain._

_She cast her eyes to his chest, unable to look directly up at him, in fear that she would break down any moment. "How do you expect me to respond to this?" At least her voice was strong._

_"How about you love me too?" He offered in that same almost sarcastic tone he always had, yet his sincerity was still there._

_"How about I'm leaving," her voice shook slightly as she pushed her way past him._

_He turned and fallowed right after her. "Doesn't what I said mean anything to you?"_

_She stopped and turned to face as the crowd around them started to count backwards to from ten to one._

_"I'm sorry Harry, I know it's New Years Eve, I know you're feeling lonely, but you just can't show up here and tell me you love me and expect that to make everything alright. It doesn't work this way!" _

_She turned her back at him to leave once again, and once again he went fallowing after her. _

_"Well how does it work?" he demanded._

_She paused to look back at him, "I don't know! But not this way."_

_Right as she was about to turn around and leave again, he grabbed her arm and pulled her around._

_"Well how 'bout this way!" he voice set to tell her everything. "I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out, I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich, I love that you get a little crinkle up on your nose when you look at me like I'm nuts, I love that after I spend a day with you I can still smell the perfume on my clothes, and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to when I go to sleep at night! And it's not because I'm lonely! And it's not because it's New Years Eve! I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible!"_

_She watched in amazement as he went of on his tangent, and yet that hurt in her heart was starting to go away._

_"You see, that is just like you Harry!" uncontrollable tears started to spill over her eyes. "You say things like that and you make impossible for me to hate you!" She took a breath and looked at the man she loved. "And I hate you Harry, I really hate you." Yet her voice, look, and heart all said clearly that she really meant "love"._

_They stared at each other, knowing that finally, after all those years, after all that time spent together, and after all the hell they just been though, they were finally together. The leaned into each other…_

**"**LIES!!!" I screamed as I paused the movie and threw used tissues at the screen as Harry and Sally leaned into each other about to kiss.

Angrily I wrapped the blanket around my body even more and threw myself on the couch in a very childlike manor while I glared at the frozen image on the TV.

It had been four very long weeks since Edward had left, and I have displayed a very interesting side to the female psyche.

The first week I was basically comatose. I just sat around and stared off to space, unsure of what was really going on around me. I remember Rose and Alice stopping by, worried because I hadn't answered their calls.. They must have taken care of me, seeing as I am still alive today, and somewhere in there I must have told them that Edward had left. They were good friends. They never asked me for any details, and they helped me by just being there.

The second week was when the flood of tears drowned my apartment. I kid you not. Alice and Rose had stopped by Costco to get a big package of tissues which only brought on a new set of tears when I remembered the times Edward and I had gone to Costco.

It was never a pretty cry either, nor an overly hysterical cry. Emmett said I sounded like a drowning bear.

And every little thing was making me cry. The first day of my crying week I didn't even make it past my room because I saw Edward's door to his room. Whenever I would see the piano it would always bring me to hysterics, until finally Jasper found big enough blanket to place over the piano.

Everyone was very sympathetic at first, and still are… to a point. But when I started crying over things like, "That's where Edward once tripped over the step," or "that's where Edward sat down to tie his shoe," they pretty much got annoyed with me.

The third week… wow. That was the week the gates of hell opened up in me. I was pissed off. Anything "Edwardy" I wanted out. I raided that empty room of his and threw out anything he left behind., It was mostly things like disposable razors and a stick of deodorant, but damn, I scrubbed that room from floor to ceiling. I was a little sad because it didn't smell like him anymore, but then I got pissed off with myself for thinking that.

I then raided my closet and threw out any clothes that he had complimented, and I told Alice that she could go out and get me any kind of clothes she want me to wear. I didn't care anymore.

I was really close to selling the piano, but I didn't have the heart to do that. The piano's home was still here.

The fourth week is coming to an end, and I have pretty much reverted back to a spoiled two year old. I forced myself to watch romantic movies because I am just that type of sick person, and with every movie I end up throwing things at the TV. Except for one movie that had a good ending, Titanic; bastard got what he deserved in the end.

Today's pick was When Harry Met Sally. I shouldn't have gone near it. Harry's line is still ringing through my head. "Men and woman cannot be friends with each other."

Oh Harry, I should have listened to you.

I heard the doorbell ring and grunted as I curled up in the fetal position and smothered my face in the couch. The only time I ever answered the door was when I had ordered takeout. If it was my friends, they all had a key and could get in on their own. I didn't want to deal with anyone else.

I heard two sets of foot steps, one a heavy clunking sound, the other the light patter of high heals.

"Oh Bella," Alice sighed as she went around the room turning on light.

"Noooo," I groaned into the couch as I let out a hiss when the light snuck in through the sides of my eyes.

"Oh Bella, stop acting like a vampire or something," Alice called out annoyed.

"But the light," I moaned. "It burns!"

"You are so overly dramatic," Alice huffed while I heard her steps head in the direction of the kitchen.

There was silence until I heard the heavier footsteps make their way to the couch. I felt a heavy weight ease into the couch, and a gentle hand start to pet my head.

"How you doing Bella?" Jasper's cool voice asked.

With a sigh I relaxed a bit into the couch. "I hurt Jasper." I replied honestly. "All the things he said… How could he say that?"

"What did he say to you Bella?"

I hadn't told anyone any of the details of what happened. It was partly because it hurt to say it out loud, and also, because a part of me still wanted to protect Edward. And I hated myself all the more for that.

I lifted my head off the couch slightly, only enough to see Jasper's concerned face. Maybe it was because I had not told anyone the whole story, and I just needed to get it out, and maybe because Jasper has always had this calming air about him, but I felt like I needed to vent to him everything that happened.

Alice marched back into the room right as I was about to open my mouth. "Bella, did you go into your kitchen even once this week?"

I smothered my face back into the couch. "No," I grunted.

The was silence for a while, probably one of Jasper's and Alice's silent conversations they were famous for.

"Well… I'm going to get going," Alice spoke slowly. "Are you ok with hanging out with just Jasper?"

"Yes, because _just Jasper_ is such a burden," Jasper teased.

"I don't care," I mumbled, although I was actually relived that Alice would be leaving so I could tell Jasper everything.

They had another one of their silent conversation and Alice said one more goodbye before she left. The moment I heard the front door close I snapped my head to look at Jasper.

"I'm in love with Edward." I had not said it out loud before, and the feeling of saying it was such a relief, yet it brought on a fresh bunch of tears to my poor puffy eyes.

Jasper's mouth dropped, then closed, then dropped again. We sat there staring at each other while Jasper kept opening and closing his mouth trying to figure out what to say.

"When?" he asked finally.

I pushed my self up from the couch so that I was sitting up while I faced him to speak. "I have been in love with him for a while actually." My heart fluttered, and I had to suppress the urge to let out a girlish giggle. I had not allowed myself to really think about my love for Edward, and when it really began, so I felt like a teenaged girl while saying this.

"I started having feelings for him around Halloween… I think I can even track it back as far as my birthday to when a small seed was planted." I thought about the feeling when I danced with Edward on my birthday,but right as I felt warmth surround my heat, realization came crashing down.

I shook my head to get back to focusing. "After Halloween I was all kinds of messed up." Jasper lifted his eye brows and narrowed his eyes. "Ok, not like I am now, but I promise, internally there was some definite turmoil."

I could tell Jasper was trying to suppress a grin so that he could focus on the conversation, but even I couldn't help but realize how pathetically lame I sounded as I continued my story.

"Then I went out with Jacob, and I really did like him… in a more rebound, physical distraction kinf of way…" I hung my head in shame. "I used him. I didn't want to like Edward so I just thought that if I stuck it out with Jacob for a little bit, then my feelings would go away. But as time went on, my feelings for him grew. There was even a two week period where it is was getting almost painful to not jump him." Jasper gave me a shocked look. "I went to the gym with him, I saw him practically naked in the shower, and then he was really sweet by taking me ice skating."

Jasper quickly looked away as I described the painful two weeks I had endured an overload of sexy/sweet Edward.

"Then Christmas happened… and I kissed him…"

"Yeah… I heard about that one," Jasper avoided my eyes, and I swore that he was trying to hide a smile.

"Yeah, it wasn't the smartest thing for me to do, but he just looked so good, and those damn drinks were working their magic," I sighed. "But I screwed up big time with that. When Jake showed up, I was more mad at the fact that Edward was acting like a boyfriend when I couldn't call him that, and everything got messed up after that."

I felt the weight start to sink into my heart again.

"We never really made up, and after New Years we just grew more and more distant. I tried to make things better, like taking him to the photo shoot, but he just wasn't having any of it. I tried to ignore his bad moods and when he would say something really mean, but when someone keeps pushing you, you eventually push back, right?"

I looked up at Jasper, hoping for some kind of reassuring nod. He only looked down at me with pity. This got me angry because right now I was something to be pitied. I was pathetic fool because I let that jackass make me think that I was special to him.

"And then I tried again, and we went out to dinner… I was going to tell him that I had broken up with Jacob."

"What?!" Jasper jumped closer to me.

"Wow, so Alice and Rose really did keep their mouth shut," I wondered out loud.

"You broke up with Jacob? When?" Jasper kept his stare on me.

"A couple days before Valentines Day, I had thought that if I told Edward, he would back off. Some idiot I was."

"So you told him and he was still a jerk?" Jasper's mouth dropped.

"No, he was being a jerk the whole night, and I didn't get a chance to tell him. Not like it matters anyway. When he made that high school comment about me, it's obvious he never really cared about me."

"What do you mean never cared about you? He has been by your side this whole time," reasoned Jasper.

I sat up. "Ok, you know when you pass a homeless, dirty dog on the road, and you feel bad, but you never really do anything about it? Well it just so happened that this dog had something that Edward needed, a place to stay."

"I thought you were a homeless dog?"

"It's a metaphor Jasper, go with it." I brushed off. "The point is, he felt bad, but didn't really care. He never really cared."

I threw my head back to the couch and let out a frustrated moan.

"Bella," Jasper patted my head. "Why would you say that Edward never cared about you? I thought you said you could tell how sincere his apologies were?"

"I thought they were! But then when we were arguing when we got back from dinner, he basically said I was just as annoying as I was in high school, but I knew he was talking about the party because I said 'I thought we were friends' like I did back then."

"I know," Jasper sighed.

I looked up at him with a questioning look.

"Bella, I need to tell you something…"

Jasper's POV

Oh God, the time has come for me to tell her. I always thought that when I tell Bella that I was at the party it would because I had grown some balls to finally tell her, not to bail Edward out of this mess. Although he did screw up big time, he really should just fix this on his own…

But damn it, with her looking up at me with those large watery brown eyes, how am I not going to tell her this now?

"I guess I should start about a couple weeks after you moved to Forks."

Flashback

That shit-head was late again! Although I know who to blame for his lateness, that bitch girlfriend of his, Whoren, but that's just my pet name for her. I guess it could be worse, she could be cheating on him.

"Hey Jasper!" Edward's voice called out.

I turned to see my best friend running towards me. He had a wide smile, a smile to match the one he had when he told me he lost his virginity. He's been smiling like this for a couple weeks. I had figured that Lauren had decided to tryout some new kinky position, but I don't know… this smile seemed a little more… pure. Fuck, I sound lame.

"Hey, where the hell have you been man?" I slapped his hand and gave him a one sided hug. "I've been waiting here forever."

"Sorry," panted Edward. "But I had to finish up my Biology and English home work."

"Dude, those are your two easiest classes. You normally do your home work in class, but for a while you haven't."

"Yeah, well…" Edward walked past me to go into the pizza shop right behind me.

"Yeah well, what?" I fallowed after him. "That wasn't an answer. You've gotta tell me now. What's got your attention in those two classes?"

Edward hustled over to a seat and began to fiddle with his menu, a menu which he memorized when we were 8 and haven't looked at since we were 10.

"What makes you think there would be something to distract me in those classes, it's not like I'm easily distracted. You shouldn't just go accusing people like that Jasper, it's not cool."

I didn't say anything, instead I just looked at him. He was hiding his face between the laminated red paper, buy I could still see his knee bouncing a mile a minute, and his hands were holding tightly onto the menu.

"It's not cheating if you like talking to someone more than you do your girlfriend, is it?" Edward asked quietly from behind the menu.

"Dude, please don't tell me that Lauren thinks you're cheating with me?" I know Lauren was a jealous girl, but damn, thinking that Edward and I are having some kind of gay love affair thing… that's a whole new level.

"No she doesn't think I'm cheating with you!" Edward slammed his menu down. "But I do think she is starting to catch on. She is always asking why I'm in such a good mood after Biology and English. But I don't even like the girl… well not _that_ way, I do like her, but I mean I'm in love with Lauren."

"Wow, getting everything off your chest I see," I grinned.

"Shut up! This is serious!"

"You can also tell me how horrible you feel for snapping at me today, twice."

"I hate you."

"Nah, you love me so much that Lauren thinks you're getting it on with a new kind of a love."

"That's just nasty, Jasper," Edward laughed.

"Hey maybe Lauren is into that kind of stuff," I said half jokingly.

"Fuck you man, that's my girl."

"Your girl, who, from what I heard in that little rant of yours, you don't even like to talk to."

"I didn't say I didn't like to talk to her…" Edward sulked.

"But you like to talk someone else more…" I lead off.

Edward sighed and folded his head onto the table. "I don't like her… I mean I do like, but not like that, but I can't see why someone wouldn't like her. She is smart, funny, brave, and I'm sure with a little work in the girly department she would be so beautiful; not that she's not pretty now… she's just…."

"Who _is _she?" As much as I love seeing a distracted Edward, I wasn't getting any information out of him.

"Her name is Bella." That same easy going smile he's had for the past couple weeks crept up on him.

"Bella…" I didn't know who this chick was, but if she got him away from Whoren, then I'd love her no matter what.

"She just moved here a couple weeks ago from Arizona," Edward smiled his infamous half a grin which had gotten us out of trouble so many times,"which is funny because I have never seen a girl as pale as she is."

I didn't say anything, I just let him talk.

"She is smart, really smart, and not just book smart, but about life in general. She knows how people feel around her, and how she can make them feel better, which shows how kind she is. And she is not afraid to tell me when I'm pissing her off, or if I'm being an idiot, or just plain stupid."

"I'm liking this girl more and more," I thought out loud. It wasn't like Edward had a really big ego, but he has always known that he was golden boy so it's definitely nice to have someone put him in his place.

Edward looked up at me with wide eyes. "Jasper you would love her! She is a really great girl, you two would get along great"

I raised an eyebrow, "You're not interested in her?"

"I have Lauren," he answered matter-of-factly.

"Because nothing can beat her," I mumbled to my self sarcastically. "Then you obviously have no objections if I go out with her then?"

Edward frowned. "You haven't even seen her."

"You already said she was a work in progress, but from what I've heard she seems like a cool girl," I shrugged.

"You wouldn't like her," Edward grabbed his menu and stared at it.

"Just a second ago you said I'd love her."

"Not like that," he snapped. "As a friend, you can only ever see her as a friend, because she can only be your friend."

We stared at each other for a few seconds, neither willing to let the other win.

Finally Edward sighed and set down his menu as he looked away.

"What are you not telling me," I asked.

"Bella and I don't have the same friends," he admitted softly.

"Ok…"

"Well… she doesn't really have friends, except for this one girl. Bella doesn't really fit in any group."

"So she loser, basically?" I asked blatantly.

"Dude! Jasper…" Edward looked at me as if I had just said something tactless.

"What? You are the one who is willing to give up a good friendship with someone just because she doesn't hang in the same social circle as you," I pointed out.

"We're friends…" Edward looked down.

"When do you guys hang out?"

"In class."

"Let me guess, Biology and English?" I paused for a second for him to look up at me. "But the moment you get out of class the two of you split ways and never even look at each other."

Edward began to fidget with his menu. "When you say it like that, I sound like a…"

"An asshole?" I offered.

"Look, you're not there at school with us," he defended. "It's different than what it sound, ok? Just forget it, and let's order some food."

Forget it? How was I supposed to forget it if every time I said something it would remind him of something Bella said?

I had to admit, from what he was telling me this Bella chick was funny, but I was getting a little tired of him talking about her so much.

It wasn't until I drove over to Forks to spend a three day weekend with Edward and his friends, who I had always gotten along with, minus Whoren of course, that I realized that Edward never talked to his friends about Bella. Her name was never mentioned, not even in conjunction to the two classes.

What kind of friendship was that? He obviously cared for this girl as one of his friends, yet he was not willing to talk to her out side of class. I wanted to judge, but the more I thought about it, I thought about the kids in my school who I never talked to outside of class. Sure to me they were just the people that you get to know because you're stuck with them, but still, I wasn't much better than Edward.

So I let him talk to me about her, and I sat there and listened while he went on and on about her.

I tried to hint to him a couple of times that perhaps he liked her, but each time that thick head of his wouldn't understand what I was trying to imply. So I finally just laid it out there for him. He acted as if I had just accused him of murder.

A few months went by, and Mr. and Mrs. Masen were going out of town which meant kick ass party at the Masen house.

Edward was all excited about this party when I brought up the topic to Bella, something he was all too happy to talk about.

"Man, it feels like I already know Bella," I started casually.

Edward chuckled as he followed me into my room, and he made his way to his regular seat on the small couch in the corner. "Yeah, I guess I do talk about her a lot, huh?"

"Yeah, but I don't care," I jumped onto my bed. "Just from what you are telling me, she seems like a really cool girl. I'm surprised that I haven't met her yet."

"Yeah… well… we don't hang out, outside of class," Edward sprawled out on the couch.

"Edward," I waited until he looked at me. "Do you think of Bella as your friend?"

"Yeah, one of my better friends," he sat up a little.

"So doesn't it make sense to at least have your best friend, me, meet your new friend, Bella?" I raised an eyebrow.

"It's a two way street," he defended.

"Yeah right, like the new girl would ask the golden boy of Forks to hang out?" I laughed. "Not going to happen, even if you guys do talk in class."

"You two would get along," Edward mumbled more to himself.

"Dude, if she is as awesome as you are, she'll probably get along with everyone at the party!" Sure I want my friend to get away from Lauren, and I'm getting tired of being the only one to know about Bella, but there was an honest part of me somewhere in there that wanted Edward to have his friend.

"You're right!" Edward sat up straight. "I'll invite her to the party, and there will be so many people there that they won't care if another person shows up."

It had always been easy for me to push Edward in the direction to get him to do what I want. This was no exception.

Edward sometimes needed a good push, and I was pushing away. Ok, so this girl may be a little socially awkward, but I'll stick by her and make sure she isn't left alone with Edward's other friends. Really, how bad could it be? I'd hung out with those guys, and they are all pretty nice.

Edward was a little more excited about this party than he was with past parties. I know he was nervous about Bella getting along with his friends, but this guy really needed to chill it.

"Fucking A," I sighed. "Can't you stop jumping your leg up and down?"

We were kicking it in Edward's room waiting for people to arrive. It was only 7 so really no one would be here for a while.

"Yeah, sorry," Edward stood up and started pacing making me wish that the restless leg would come back.

I could hear a patter along the tile hallway leading to Edward's room, and I could start to feel a migraine coming already.

"Babyyyyyyyy!!!" the demon woman came charging in with her arms open and flew to Edward.

I don't know how Edward manages to kiss her and not throw up. I just keep telling myself that I'll eventually have my best friend back, I just needed to wait her out. It's a high school thing, those things never last that long.

Right as Edward started to grope her ass, I cleared my throat getting both of their attention.

"Hey Jasper," her tone was like poison, and her eyes like daggers. She was just a whole lot of death. How can Edward not see through her?!

"Hey Lauren," I greeted her in a too nice voice that always drove her insane. "What are you doing here so early?"

"I'm here to see my boyfriend, and be the good girlfriend of the boyfriend who lives here."

My God, she managed to say that sentence completely seriously and thinks she got it right.

"You mean being the hostess?" I asked while trying to fight back a laugh. It was a losing battle.

"Whatever," she hissed.

"You two be nice," Edward jumped in and gave me a look of warning.

The door bell rang, I lifted my hand in momentary defeat. "I'll go downstairs and be the good best-friend of the friend who lives here."

It may be bros before hoes, but the puss turns him into a wuss.

It got crowded pretty fast with people that I've seen, and all recognized me. I had been staying by the front door to keep an eye out for a girl who seemed a little out of place there, but I wasn't having any luck.

I finished off my beer a while ago, and needed something to keep this watch of the party going so I risked being away from the door to go grab another bottle. As I neared the kitchen I heard a pair of giggles that I recognized, and while my head was telling me to turn around, my other head was starting to rise to full attention from those giggles.

I really wanted another beer…

"Hey Nicki, hey Clair," I gave them my best easy smile which I had perfected for making girls fall for me.

Clair was the first to turn around. She had a round attractive face which was totally coated with makeup, but she didn't look like a clown, I'll give her that. Her short curly hair was in a perfect bob. I could only wonder how long it would be before someone disturb it. She had on skin tight jeans that left absolutely nothing to the imagination, and a red halter top that left her arms, neck, chest, and stomach for all to see.

Nicki turned her gaze towards me as well. She was just as short as Clair, they both came to my chest. Then again they were barely 5ft, and I just had another growth spurt and was reaching 6ft. Nicki had her trademark sex hair tonight. her dark blond locks flew everywhere. Her eyeliner was thick and her lashes endless. She had the same type of painted on blue jeans on as Clair, but she had an off the shoulder black top instead.

They were sexy as fuck, and damn it, I really wanted to make all of those jokes about a threesome come true. I know I have a soft (or really a hard) spot for short girls. I don't know what it is. But they are also the school sluts really; already marked territory… marked by many.

"Jasper," Nicki gave a breathless sigh and licked her lips as she eyed me.

"Careful there, you keep looking at me like that, and I'll think you are eye-fucking me," I grinned as I made my way over to the refrigerator.

"Baby, you clearly aren't reading our eyes correctly," Clair purred. "Right now we're blowing you."

I shouldn't have come in here, but hey, every guy should have a threesome in their life once… even in every guy in Forks has had the same threesome… No I needed to resist.

"You two are looking good." Not the best line to show resistance.

"You are looking amazing as ever," Nicki started to close the distance between us with Clair at her heals.

"Have you finally decided to come play with us Jasper?" Clair caressed my arm, and made me want to go play with them all the more.

"I'm here for the drink," I lifted the bottle to show them.

"And you'll stay for us," Nicki grinned.

Why was I resisting again? A perfectly good threesome is being offered to me on a silver platter, and I'm walking away from it? Fuck, Forks isn't my town.

Nicki was the one more in front of me, so I picked her up roughly and placed her on the counter as she giggled. Clair started to masterfully undo my belt, and kiss any place on my chest she could reach.

Just as I was about to kiss Nicki I heard the last person I wanted to hear.

"Right!" I heard Lauren's laugh mixed in with a few others. "My Edward invited you, Bella Swan, to this party." She spoke her name as if it was nothing more than dirt on her shoes. "Now why don't I believe that?"

Bella Swan. Shit, that was the girl I was supposed to be looking for! I pushed Clair out of the way and left Nicki on the counter to make my way to fix his mess. As I made my way through the drunken idiots I saw Lauren staring at a pretty girl in a plain t-shirt and jeans. Her hair wasn't as shinny as some of the girls here, and it was obvious that it wasn't styled. Even I can tell that she wearing any makeup, but she was still beautiful in her own way.

"Look, believe it or don't. I don't care, but Edward did invite me to this party." Her voice sounded like it was getting stronger, and I could hear a little bit of the person Edward had been talking about.

"Why would he invite you?" Nicki yelled out as she pushed her way through the gathering crowd.

Crap, there was a full blown crowd around her now, and the party had stopped to this girl's humiliation.

"Because," her voice cracked, "because we are friends."

People all around broke off into their own commentary. I clearly heard Clair yell out, "You, friends with him?"

Finally I heard someone yell, "Here he is, let's ask him!"

A very confused looking Edward was pushed to the center of the circle where Lauren attached herself to him instantly. I saw Edward quickly scan the room and try to evaluate what was going on, and I saw the realization hit him.

"Edward," Lauren's stupid high pitch voice sang. "Swan here has some kind of crazy idea that you invited her."

Now is your chance Edward. Tell everyone that Bella is your friend, and that they all need to fuck off. Stand up, and be a man!

"Oh, she did?" He kept his eyes on Bella the whole time as Bella stared right back. "Why would she say that?"

Both Bella's and my jaw dropped.

"So you didn't invite her," Whoren pushed.

"She must have heard me mention the party while I was talking to someone else," Edward looked away from her. "Why would I invite her?"

"Because we're friends!" she yelled at him while she bit back her relentless tears. "You told me that I was your friend."

"Are you two friends?" Lauren just kept fucking pushing.

Edward did a weird nervous laugh thing. "No, we are barely even acquaintances."

I wanted to go out there and punch Edward, and comfort this girl. I wanted to tell everyone how shallow they were for judging someone without even knowing them and that they were all cowards.

Yet, I couldn't move. The coward in me started to come up with excuses: Edward would fix this, this isn't my problem, she's a big girl and can handle herself.

But in the end, I was just a coward, and I just stood there and watched as she called Edward a bastard and ran out in tears. Tears that I helped cause because all I did there was stand there and watch.

Why couldn't I move? Why couldn't I be the man I wanted to be, the man that I thought I was?

Follow that girl out the door, tell everyone to stop laughing, and just make everything better.

The crowd broke up, and everyone went in their own directions to get back into the party. I could hear people already start to do impressions of Bella, and coming up with different ways to harass her on Monday.

Nicki and Clair came back to try and pull me away to a direction of a bedroom, but I was not in any kind of mood to do anything, especially not with either one of them as they started to criticize what Bella was wearing.

I saw Edward head up the stairs with Lauren right on his tail. It didn't look like they were getting away for a quick lay.

I told the slut duo to back off and, although it's not my style, said enough rude things to them so that they wouldn't be bugging me for our next few encounters.

Everyone was so involved with themselves that they didn't notice I was going up the stairs. Edward normally had a "no upstairs" policy.

"Why the fuck was she here?" I heard Lauren's voice sneer as I quietly stopped outside of Edward's room.

"I already told you," Edward answered in a voice that I had never heard before. He sounded worn, he sounded older.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" Lauren asked, and I desperately wanted to call out 'Yes'.

"People talk Edward," she went on. "You think I don't know that you talk to her all the time in your two classes?"

Edward must have looked surprised, because Lauren broke off in a cackle type of laugh. "You are popular, and for you to completely ignore everyone in class just so you can talk to the loser girl next to you isn't normal."

"We just talk about class," Edward tried to defend himself. Although what he should have been saying was that Bella was his friend, and if she had a problem with it, then they should just break up.

But instead Edward stayed silent as Lauren went on to tell him what it means to be popular, and they had an image to maintain.

Finally Lauren's voice got lower, and I had to strain to hear her over the music. "I never want you to talk to her again."

"No," Edward spoke up, shocking me and probably Lauren as well. "I need to apologize to her. I basically just let her hang, and I need to fix this."

"Have you not been paying attention to what I have been saying?" Lauren yelled.

"I hurt her!" Edward yelled right back, the first time he had ever raised his voice to Lauren. "I told her to come here, and I abandoned her when she needed me. I'll apologize to her and make everything better."

They were both quiet. I was doing a little mental victory dance in my head imagining the two of them breaking up, and Edward getting with Bella.

"Do you think she will forgive you?" Lauren interrupted my mental dance.

"What?" Edward asked.

"I'm not sure if you exactly understand how horrible you were to her," Lauren went on. "She basically doesn't have any friends, and you probably confirmed her worst nightmare. Girls are not like guys, we can't forget like you."

"She'll forgive me," Edward answered back confidently.

"Why should she?" Lauren pushed. "Why should she forgive you? You are obviously ashamed of her, and if you were really sorry then you would apologize outside of class, but even then she probably wouldn't forgive you."

They were quiet again, and I felt sick.

"I'll see you downstairs," Lauren walked out the door. She saw me standing there, glaring at her. She smiled. "You're no better then he is," then she left.

I went inside Edward's room and saw him sitting on his bed with his head in between his hands. I sat next to him and copied his posture.

"She'll forgive me right?" asked Edward after some time went by.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "We won't know until you apologize."

That was a rough night. Edward and I just stayed in his room sitting in silence as we thought back over our new discovery of ourselves. Around 2 am, another realization hit me. I was selfish, as well. Here I was dwelling on how horrible I am when I didn't even wonder what Bella was doing right then. Was she crying? Was she already over this?

I was hoping that she would not care about what went on to night, but my mind kept replaying her tears.

I left the next day after I helped Edward clean up his house. We were both quiet, too ashamed to face the each other, and too ashamed to even remotely enjoy our day.

By Monday after noon I was an anxious fool. Edward had told me that he was going to wait until Monday so that he could apologize to her properly face to face. I could practically see it in my mind. He would say his speech in the cafeteria in front of everyone, and everyone would realize that Bella was cool and Lauren was a bitch. I didn't exactly know how that would work out, but that was what I was hoping for anyway.

It wasn't until four in the afternoon that Edward called.

"Hey, you said you would call earlier," I jumped right in. "Please tell me it's because you have spent all that time fixing things with Bella."

"I couldn't do it," he breathed.

"Wha… what?"

"I couldn't apologize," his voice was barely above a whisper.

"It's not that fucking hard," I started to get angry. "You just go up to her and apologize for being such a shit bag."

"Yeah, and it shouldn't have been hard to defend her from all the assholes who were being dicks to her, but neither of us could fucking do that so don't you judge me Jasper!" I could hear Edward pant on the other end of the phone.

He was right. I had thought I would have been able to defend a person being bullied, but I didn't do that. Who's to say that I would be able to apologize?

"What did you do?" I asked solemnly.

"I didn't say anything to her, and I was so sick of myself for not having the balls to just say a simple sorry, that I went to go ask if I could transfer out of the classes I had with her. But right as I was asking, she came into the office and heard me. Jasper, she was so angry and so hurt."

That was the last thing I wanted to hear.

"What are you going to do?" I asked.

"Just stick it out, and try to grow some balls and give her a decent apology."

"Tell me when you do, because I want to go right after you." I had already started to go over how I was going to apologize.

"I'll do it tomorrow for sure."

But he didn't do it the next day, or the next, or the next, or in the week or months following. At first he would call me up everyday to give me an updates, but each day was pretty much like the last. People were being extremely mean to her, and Edward still couldn't muster up the courage to apologize.

I had considered driving over to Forks myself to find Bella Swan and just tell her how sorry I was. I didn't have to wait for Edward to apologize first. I could do it on my own.

But again, I was similar to my best friend in that I couldn't get up the nerve.

Edward was torn up about it more then I was which was saying something. He would laugh with his other friends, do whatever it was to make Lauren happy, but I could tell how miserable he was. And although he hadn't apologized to Bella yet, he was doing all he do for her on this side of things.

He was able to help get them off her back a lot sooner than they probably would have otherwise, and there were several really nasty pranks that he was able to prevent from happening to Bella. So even if he never said a word to her, or even looked her in the eye, he was watching out for her.

We never talked about her again after that year, but even through out the years I always realized the smile he would get whenever he would hear Swan or Bella. He still cared (and I think he always will) for that girl, and although I never met her, I knew her completely, Bella Swan.

Back to present.

I stared as Bella's blank face.

I'm not even sure what you're trying to say here.

"So, he may have made that stupid comment about you being annoying like you were in high school, but I think that it shows that whatever it was that's really bothering him underneath must be pretty big if he were to mess up and say something like that," I concluded.

**********************************************************************

"You were at the party?" Bella stared at me with no emotions in her eyes.

"I am so sorry, Bella," I felt myself choking over my own breath. "I really meant to stand up for you, and I really meant to tell you, but I just really wanted to impress Alice, and if she knew I had hurt you like that before…"

"You were there?" Bella repeated.

"I know I am asking for a lot, but please Bella, please forgive me," I hung my head in complete disgrace. How can I admit something like that to Bella and expect her to forgive me just like that? Edward may have been the main one to hurt her, but I had kept it a secret.

There was a long silence as I kept my head down not wanting to see the tear stained face that had haunted me for years.

"It's alright," she finally answered.

"What?" I lifted my head and saw Bella actually smiling at me.

"Please, it's obvious how sorry you are," Bella shrugged. "But it's kind of comforting knowing that there was someone in the crowd that night that was hurting for me.. It makes me wonder if there were any other people who either felt bad then, or at least after the party. It kind of gives me hope back for humanity."

"So… you are really ok with me?" My mouth hung open.

"Yeah, you are still the Jasper I've always known. You've helped me, you've seen me though my ups and downs, and you've help me whenever I needed it whether I asked for it or not," she grinned at me. "Maybe it's because you were there that night that you and I are such good friends now."

I leaned in and grabbed her to pull her into a tight hug. "Bella you are an amazing woman."

"You say that now, but you still need to tell Alice," she giggled.

"Maybe it should be Alice that I really need to worry about," I laughed nervously. Finally I looked back to Bella, and with a serious tone I asked, "So you understand Edward a little better?"

Bella let out a sigh which held the entire array of emotions that she had gone though these past several weeks. "I understand that he probably didn't mean to say what he did, and there is probably another underliying issue, but until I know what it is, it doesn't make sense that he was such a jerk that last month and a half we lived together. I'm willing to forgive him only because I don't think I can possibly go on hating and loving a single person so much, but I need to hear it from him. He needs to tell me, and if he waits another ten years I will not be as understanding as I am now."

"I understand," and I did. Love and hate are two emotions that people say are similar in many ways, but they are still entirely different. There are times when I'm perturbed with Alice, but even then I feel this overwhelming sense of uneasiness that I can possibly go on being angry with her.

So for Bella to both love Edward, and hate him, both to the extreme, is something for which I can truly feel sorry for her.

I glanced at my watch and was surprised to see how much time had passed. "I'm sorry Bella, but I need to go…"

"It's alright Jasper," Bella stood up from her spot from the couch, a feat unto itself. "This place is in desperate need of cleaning, and that goes for me, as well."

"Getting back to normal?" I asked.

"As much as I can," Bella brought her brows together in a pained expression. "I can never be normal when the other part of my heart isn't here."

I pulled Bella into one more hug before thanking her one last time, and apologizing again.

As I walked the short distance back to my apartment, I couldn't help but feel as if I had a hundred pound weight taken off of me.

Not even a second after I unlocked the door Alice was in front of me. I pulled into a good long kiss and smiled as I stared into her eyes.

"How did it go?" she asked as she dragged me over to the couch.

"Well, she's cleaning and plans on taking a shower."

Alice screamed and threw her arms around me. "Jasper, that's why I love you! You are so amazing and such a wonderful guy!"

"You really think that?" I asked as I rested my forehead on hers and watched as her smile lit up her whole face.

"Yes, you are an extremely good man who always has the best intentions," she closed her eyes to kiss me gently.

When she pulled back I opened my eyes and smiled. "It's good you think that, because there is something I need to tell you…"

* * *

**OK. So first off Nicki and Clair are based on good friends of mine. They do NOT act like that in the slightest. They are the nicest girls you can ever meet and they basically look like how I described them, only not slutty. Haha So shout out to the two of them!!!**

**Some may say that Bella forgave Jasper too easily, but she has grown since Edward came back into her life and she sees that Jasper is a good guy, but really her punishment for him is that he has to tell Alice, which I think is punishment enough.**

**Next chapter I'm not sure who's POV it will be in. And I'm not sure about title. It will probably be call: _One more_**

**And if you fallow me on Twitter, my SN is tbjac89 then you can get updates on what's going on.**

**OH and I'm going to Disneyland on Friday and Saturday, not really important info, but I'm just really excited (I haven't been there in a while)**

**Sorry again. Only 4 more to go!!!!!!!**


	26. One Last Chance

**I'm back, I'm sorry, but I really hope this chapter makes up for it. Disneyland was GREAT and thanks to everyone who told me to have fun, I did.**

**So thanks again to my awesome beta, and thanks for all the reviews!**

**I do not own Twilight**

* * *

Chapter 26 One Last Chance

Bella POV

I was doing better. I didn't look like shit anymore, as Rosalie had clearly pointed out to me. I went back to grooming as I had been trained to do, and I could see the relief in Alice's eyes when she saw me wearing make up and with my hair straightened.

I think what really helped get me out of my funk, besides hearing what went on with Edward in high school, was the reaction Alice had to Jasper's confession.

In all honesty I was not mad at him in the slightest. It was still first and for most Edward's fault, and I was beginning to reevaluate my forgiving him for what happened in high school, but hearing that there was a person in the room that night that wanted to help me and was affected by my humiliation comforted me in a way. High school years are a difficult time when kids can succumb to peer pressure even when it goes against their better instincts. Maybe someone else at the party also grew from the experience.

I started to reenact scenes from the party over and over in my head to see if there were any other people who looked like they wanted to stand up for me, but in the end I just got even more pissed off with Edward.

So the next day when I had a semi-hysterical Alice in my room crying over me as I was just waking up, I quickly forgot what I was supposed to be thinking about.

"I… I'm… I'm… so sorry!!!" Alice had sobbed as she collapsed onto my bed. "I know how horrible that night was for you, and how you have been hurting, and I didn't know!"

I let out a sigh, although I had a smile on my face. Alice really did love me. "Alice," I sat up and reached out for her so she could crawl up next to me, "it's alright. Jasper and I talked about it last night, and really, it's ok."

"How can you say it's ok?" she looked up at me, and it really did break my heart to see tears flowing freely from her pained eyes and her bottom lip quivering. "You said that they all laughed at you! That no one stood up for you and just watched."

"You're right, no one took my side, and that hurts, but apparently there was someone there who didn't laugh." I reached over for a tissue out of the box that had rooted itself on my night stand during my crying phase and started to gently dab Alice's puffy eyes. "I can't blame him for being a scared teenage boy who didn't know what to do."

Alice bit her lip, and I wanted to point out that she was doing the very thing which she had given me so much crap about over the years. "But I feel like he shouldn't go unpunished," she said.

"I already did punish him," I smiled. "I told him he had to tell you the story, and what did you do when he explained?"

Alice started to grin with me. "I kicked him out in only his boxers."

Maybe it was because I had been sad for too long, but for the first time in a while I laughed so hard that welcomed tears pooled in my eyes, and my stomach hurt like I had just been doing a bunch of sit ups.

"And how in the hell did you get him in his boxers?" I managed to say once we had both calmed down. "I'm assuming that he had all of his clothed on when he told you, right?"

"Oh, he was clothed, shoes and all," Alice nodded, "but I listened to the whole story, and the moment he was done I basically lost it. I mean, you are my best friend, and he is only telling me this now when the wedding is like four months away! Not like this would break us up or anything, but stil, it was pretty sneaky of him.

I think he knew I was going to spring, probably because I hadn't moved an inch while he told me, but he climbed over the couch, and all I got was one of his shoes. Well, you can imagine that it went on like that for a while, getting one piece of clothing at a time. Sometimes I would get two things, like his shirt and a sock."

I raised my eye brow at her.

"Let's just say I play dirty," she shrugged, and I could see that evil little sparkle in her eye, "and soon enough he ended up in only boxers, and I pushed him out in the hall way and told him not to come back home until I figured out a proper punishment."

"Well, I said that I was going to let you handle reprimanding him, but don't be too harsh on him," I shook my head. Really, just knowing that Alice was angry at him was punishment enough for Jasper. "How long are you going to keep it up?" I asked.

Alice brushed away whatever tears were left on her eyes, and smiled a smile at me that made me want to pray for Jasper's safety.

"Trust me, after this he will never hide anything from me again."

Poor, poor, poor Jasper. After what Alice did to him, he'll probably call her up every time went to use the restroom. She called Jasper and told him to come over to my place, right after she fixed her make up, of course.

Jasper had spent the night at Emmett's and Rose's place, and after telling them the whole story, they had to come along as well. Both Emmett and Rose looked a little cautious when they saw me. They were probably wondering when I would either break into tears or just start breaking things in general, but I was too busy laughing at Jasper who was wearing one of Emmett's t-shirts and a pair of his sweat pants. Jasper had to keep holding up the sweats so they wouldn't fall down completely, but he had a hard time actually getting a hold on the waistband with the shirt swimming around him. He looked like a little boy wearing his big brother's clothes.

"Alice, honey," Jasper started to walk carefully to where Alice was sitting on my couch, "I'm really sorry."

Alice had her arms crossed and was staring in the completely opposite direction. "You shouldn't be apologizing to me right now," she responded in a cool voice. "Bella said you apologized to her, but I want to see it."

Jasper turned on his heel and ran to where I was standing by the entrance to my room, looked at me with this sad puppy dog look. It seemed like he was begging me for something with his eyes.

"I am so sorry, Bella." He stared down at me making me realize just how tall he really is. "Please, please, forgive me."

I tilted my head to the side and saw Alice staring over at us. She had told me to make him suffer a little, but I wasn't angry at him.

"Okay, Jasper. I, Isabella Swan, officially forgive you, Jasper Whitlock," I replied with the most authoritarian voice I could muster.

I saw Alice roll her eyes before she stood up and marched over to us.

"Ok, you are off the hook with Bella, but you still lied to me Jasper!" she stared him down, "so you will be punished one complete day for every year we were together. That's three days!"

"But they've only been together for like two years and a couple months, right?" Emmett asked.

Alice spun around and glared at him, "I'm rounding up!"

The first day was typical Alice punishment. She went to the mall and made Jasper carry all her bags. She later told me that she took him to Victoria's Secret and tried on many different types of sexy things only to get him all hot and bothered, then told him they were not going to have sex until after his three day sentence.

Alice was right, she played dirty.

The next day she had him come over to my apartment while I wasn't home and made him clean the whole place from floor to ceiling. When I got home I found Alice relaxing on the couch with a magazine while Jasper was cleaning my TV screen. Oh, did I mention the light pink apron he was wearing?

I explained to Alice that I didn't want to punish Jasper, and he didn't need to be in my place cleaning. Alice only shrugged, not really paying any attention to me, and told me that he'd already finished cleaning her place and Rose's.

The third day she got him where it hurts. We all should have seen it coming with her teasing through the two days prior, but I still felt badly for the man. Alice always did call herself the queen of blue balls.

The five of us were all out to eat, and I could see the little caresses Alice would give Jasper, or how she'd whisper something in his ear that made him look like he was in physical pain. She later told me she was doing this for her own benefit because the sex on the fourth day was pretty damn good. Actually, she said something else, but I'm sure as hell not repeating it.

So life was good. I was smiling and laughing again. I was going out with my friends, and I was back to writing. But I still cried at night, some nights worse than others. Often I would wake up in the morning with a damp pillow meaning I was crying in my sleep. I preferred not being awake for it.

No one mentioned Edward's name or anything even slightly related to him. This proved difficult because even as mad as I was at him, I still wanted to know he was doing alright.

If I allowed myself to think about him for too long I felt like I was going to explode, I would become so angry. How dare he live in my apartment for all those months, allow me to believe that he was one of my dearest friends, then treat me like dirt. I concluded it was all because I had let him off too easily the first time around. I should have made him grovel like Rose had suggested.

Well, I will _not_ make that same mistake twice!

Then the tears would come. Who said that I would ever get a chance to see him again? Maybe he wouldn't even want my forgiveness. What if I saw him again, and it was my last chance, and if I just told him it was ok…

NO!

That is crazy, desperate girl with no self respect talking. And _I_ refuse to be that girl. If he is truly sorry, then he will do whatever it takes to make amends. Look at Jasper. He suffered a full 24 hours of blue balls just so Alice would forgive him.

But Jasper was in love with her, I reminded myself.

Edward was not in love with me. I, however, am in love with Edward. I really am pathetic.

I had been doing such a good job of avoiding the real world that I completely forgot about the photo shoot I did for Cosmo. It wasn't until April 14th, two months after Edward left, that that stupid photo shoot was thrown back in my face.

I walked into my apartment with my arms full of mail and laughing as I thought about my lunch with Alice and Emmett. Once in the kitchen, I started sorting the mail and a big manila envelope caught my attention. I didn't recognize the return address, and there wasn't a name on it. Opening it up, I felt my body freeze and my heart start to pump a mile a minute. There was the Cosmo magazine.

A note was taped to the front:

**To the amazingly hot and sexy Bella…**

**We know you probably have a million of these already in your apartment, because really, who would **_**not**_** buy a million copies of the magazine they were in, but this issue also comes with copies of all the other pictures we took that didn't make it into the spread.**

**We hope to see you soon!!!**

**Love –Loftus and Tiffany**

**P.S. Give Edward my love – Loftus**

How could I have forgotten about the photo shoot with Cosmo? Well, there's an easy answer: I have been trying to block out Edward.

Plus I have been at home most of the time, only going out occasionally, so it was possible not to have seen it on the stands. My friends, being the amazing friends they are, probably all made sure to never bring it up, just like the topic of Edward.

The magazine felt heavy in my hands, and the longer I held onto it the more I felt like Edward was going to pop out of the pages and say all those nasty things to me again. With renewed anxiety, I rushed to the couch and dropped into the safety of the cushions.

The cover had some actress that was too thin, and too popular for her own good. There were captions all along the cover advertising 10 different places that all people should try having sex, 15 different workouts to get tighter abs, and 20 different ways to turn "him" on. And on the bottom corner of the cover was a caption in bold, bright pink letters saying, "Interview with hot author, Isabella Swan!"

Ok, I have to admit, it was pretty cool to see my name on a magazine like this. It made me feel pretty damn good.

I flipped through the pages until I found a picture of me taking up the entire page. It was from the first set we did, the ones in the library, only it wasn't me. It couldn't be me because this girl, no, woman, was leaning back against the big desk was showing her curvy figure with a tight black pencil skirt and a revealing white ruffled shirt. The shoes were, as Loftus called them, "fuck me" shoes. The real proof that this woman could not be me was her expression. She had a very sexy "come hither" look and was down right gorgeous. Yet the harder I looked, the more I could tell that it really was me, and I was looking damn good!

I turned the page to see even more photos of me from that library set, even (oh God) the one where I was laying on the desk. On the page next to it was a small article titled, **Isabella: The Writer**.

It was a pretty basic history of how I got started, why I wanted to be a writer, what I had already published, and what was coming out. I've read this a thousand times with slight variations, but this one was pretty good.

The next page was a single larger picture of me smiling at the camera. The black 50's one piece bathing suit looked amazing against the pink backdrop, and my pale skin actually looked pretty good, too. Like the page before, there was print on the page beside the photo, but this time it was titled, **Isabella: The Inspiration.** This section contained different information than other articles I've seen about me. It talked about my writing methods, and who inspires me.

I was surprised by the next page. There we were, Edward and I, sitting on a couch looking at each other and laughing. Oh God, I thought I remembered him well enough, but I'd forgotten how beautiful he really is. My memories didn't truly capture that odd colored copper hair, and my dreams didn't do his smile justice. It hurt to look at him, but I couldn't pry my eyes away.

I remembered being really worried that Edward was in a bad mood that day, and wondering if I should have brought him to the shoot in the first place, but in this full page picture we were smiling and looking at each other as if we were in on some inside joke. It made me realize that we _were_ happy, we_ were_ friends at one point. Yet somewhere along the way something screwed us up. Whether my secret love for him was what drove us apart, or his and Jacob's differences, there was something that made him say the things he did.

Looking at the picture of the two of us in this magazine, and remembering Jasper's story, it showed me that he really did care for me. I was his friend just as he was mine, but something made him do what he did.

Would I ever know the real reason he said those hurtful things? Probably not. Would I ever forgive him for saying them? Let's just say he would have to do some major ass kissing followed by a long period of groveling. But realistically, I'm not sure I have the goodness in my heart to ever just smile and say everything is ok. How could I look at him without wondering if he would turn on me again?

Do I want him back in my life? Yes, oh God, yes I do! I would give anything to have things go back to the way it used to be before I fell in love with him, before I started dating Jacob, and before he hurt me.

How can I want to see him so badly, yet want to kick the crap out of him at the same time? All these emotions made my head hurt, and made me hungry.

I closed the magazine without even looking at the rest of the article or any of the other pictures they had of us. As I went to push the magazine back into the envelope it came in, I saw a bundle of pictures wrapped up in a rubber band.

Another time, I would look at those another time.

"Miss Swan, can you turn to me please? And stop fidgeting!" The elderly seamstress with a heavy Italian accent glared at me.

"Right, sorry." I turned away from the mirror and back to face Mrs. Amoretti, the 80 something year old woman whose bite was bigger than her bark, meaning she scared the crap out of me. Alice was sitting on a white fluffy couch as she eyed my dress like a hawk does its prey. Rosalie was in the dressing room next to me battling her dress just to put it on.

It was one of the many grueling wedding tasks we had to do, and as the actual date got closer, the more crap I had to do. Today we were trying on our bridesmaid's dresses.

My dress was a very pretty light yellow, a color which actually didn't look too badly on me. The bodice was painfully tight. I had complained once about how I couldn't breathe, but Alice simply shrugged and told me that I could always breathe after the wedding. And when I tried to complain again… well, let's just say that I learned that breathing really isn't that necessary. Once the nothing's-wrong-perfectly-fine bodice reached my waist, the skirt flared out a bit and stopped right below my knees.

This dress was completely Alice's design, as was her wedding dress. It was the first time her designs had actually been created, and she was loving every moment of it.

"Good job, Alice," Rose's voice called out from behind the dressing room curtain. "This dress is amazing."

Rose stepped out, and whatever damn-I-look-good thoughts I might have had before left.

"Crap," I moaned. "Rose, you look so much better in this dress than I do! Your boobs look amazing!"

"Thank you, and you're full of crap." Rose stepped up on the platform beside me. "You look just as amazing, Bella. Look at your ass!"

I tried to glance behind me in the mirror, but Mrs. Amoretti yelled at me. "No moving!"

"I designed this dress knowing that the both of you were going to wear it!" defended Alice. "I knew you both would look good. Are you questioning the dress, Bella?"

"No Alice," I widened my eyes. "This dress is perfect! I am not questioning the dress."

"But I'm questioning you sanity," Rose added. "You need to calm down. We still have time before you can start freaking out."

"True," she took a deep breath. "Just don't question the dress."

"Miss Swan, you move I can't sow straight, you no move!" Mrs. Amoretti sighed dramatically before getting up and going back to the supply room.

"What's up with you, Bella?" Rose raised an eye brow at me.

"Yeah, you have been extra fidgety today," Alice asked from her seat.

I hopped down from the platform and started to walk around the room. "I don't know, I think it's just cabin fever. I think I want to go out to the real world now, leave the apartment."

Alice and Rose looked at each other and were doing some kind of silent conversation.

"You guys I'm right here," I sighed. "It's no big deal, really. I think I just want to actually socialize."

"But what happens if you run into… you know," Rosalie gave me a half shrug.

"I'd probably run the other direction," I admitted. "There is no way that I would actually sit down with that man willingly," I said, even if my heart was telling me otherwise.

"Bella, realistically, you would probably see him," Alice looked at me with a steady eye.

I took a deep breath and straightened my dress. "Look, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. Until then, I just want to get out of the apartment and meet new people or something."

"You want to start dating?" both Alice and Rose gasped.

"No!" my heart hurt too much at the idea of dating. "I just… it's that." I bit my lip.

How could I explain to them the hole in my heart? It feels like there is this emptiness in my life, and I just want something to fill it. I lost my best friend and the man that I love all in the same moment. I just needed something to numb the pain.

"Perfect!" Alice clapped her hands together, interrupting my thought process. "Bella, I have a friend that is new to Seattle, and I was supposed to have dinner with him on Thursday, but something just came up, and I'm crazy busy. I already asked everyone else I know if they could go and entertain him for the night, but everyone is busy."

"Yep," Rose nodded in agreement. "You know the hectic life of an agent."

"So, would you consider having dinner with him?" Alice looked at me with her big puppy dog eyes, meaning she really wanted me to go out with him.

"I don't want to go out on a date," I answered with a small smile.

Alice rolled her eyes and waved away my question. "Please, I know that, and I am not asking you to go out on a date with him. Plus he is hung up over some other girl so it will not be a date."

"I don't know…"

"Bella!" Alice crossed her arms and gave me a very stern and exasperated look. "Everyone else already got to choose a guy for you to go to dinner with. I know that those were dates, but you called them 'friendly' dinners. That is all that I'm asking you to do. Have a friendly dinner. You claim that you are ready to leave your apartment, well, prove it!"

"All I was going to say was I don't know what to wear…" I grinned at her as her cheeks turned a light shade of pink.

"Oh, well… I'll get you something." Alice turned and started digging through her purse which she only did when she was embarrassed.

Rose and I looked at each other and burst into laughter as we walked back to the dressing room.

Alice had stopped by early on Thursday to help me get ready. I had on a casual, yet nice blue halter dress that made my boobs look great. My favorite thing about this dress was it had pockets even if Alice wouldn't let me put anything in them. My hair was down and relaxed in curls, and my makeup was very natural looking. My shoes were small white heels, matching my white Prada purse.

"Alice, please stop fiddling with my hair," I growled for the fourth time as she tried to get a strand on the side of my head to do a perfect wave.

"I just want you to look perfect," I heard her grumble. Annoyed, I stood up, and the heels I had on it put my head out of her reach. "No fair!"

"So why is it that you are so busy that you couldn't have dinner with your friend, whose name you haven't even told me, yet you are here making me look perfect as if I was going on a date or something?" I crossed my arms.

"First, I am really busy, but I managed to squeeze some time in here for you so you don't look like a complete fool on your first public outing."

"Second, I didn't want to tell you his name because it sounds too much like _his_ name, and I just wanted to spare you that until last minute."

Starting to feel bad.

"And I already told you that it is not a date. When do I ever lie to you, Bella?" Alice gave me a small smile.

I sighed and smiled along with her. "You only lie when you feel like you are protecting me."

"Exactly, and what could I possible be trying to protect you from right now?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Ok, I get it," I nodded as I followed Alice to the front door. "I'm sorry, I guess I'm just nervous."

"You shouldn't be," Alice positioned her purse on her shoulder. "It will feel like you two have known each other for years."

Alice told me that I was having dinner with this mystery man at 13 Coins Restaurant, one of my favorite places. She was obviously trying butter me up.

I walked into the restaurant and gave Alice's name to the Maitre d' who walked me through the dimly lit room while a modern Tango sounding song played in the background.

I scanned the room looking for someone that looked like he might be Alice's friend. From the corner of my eye I saw a flash of copper hair, and in that moment my heart just about jumped out of my chest.

No, there was no way that he could be here. The possibility of that happening… Oh God, the Maitre d' just turned and is now walking in the direction of the copper haired look-a-like. I need to regain my reason before I sit down and scare my dinner companion. The Maitre d' stopped beside the nightmarish table. A wave of nausea hit me while I considered the possibility that Alice had lied to me about the whole visiting friend scenario. The probability was very high.

"Miss, this is your table," I heard the Maitre d' tell me, but I wasn't looking at him. I kept my focus on the unkempt hair on the head that slowly started to turn around.

"Bella?" his voice hit me like a shot of Jager.

"Oh no," I gasped as I took a few steps back and stumbled into a woman's chair behind me.

"You are the one I'm supposed to have dinner with?" Edward's bright green eyes shone with an excitement and life that I had not seen in months. In fact, I hadn't seen Edward in months, let alone a smiling, glowing Edward. Looks like his months without me have been treating him well.

"I'm going to kill Alice," I looked down, anywhere but at his eyes. Although I had to admit that when I glanced at his chest covered by a blue, soft looking, button up shirt, I had a flash back of when I saw him in almost nothing.

Looking anywhere near him was not safe.

"Bella, you look amazing," Edward took a step out towards me. "I need to talk to you. I need to tell you how…"

"Sorry you are?" I cut him off, allowing my head to snap back up and look him directly in the eye. "You don't get to say that word!"

"Bella please," Edward's eyes looked sad, almost as pained as I felt on the day _he_ left_ me_. "Please just have dinner with me, we can talk."

I started to raise my voice. "No I will not have dinner with you! This is ridiculous!"

"Miss!" the Maitre d' yelled, getting the complete attention of the people around us. "The gentleman you are arguing with is not the one with whom you are dining."

"What?" I swung my head to look at the slightly scared looking man.

"_This_ is the table that I was indicating," he waved his hand to the side.

A slender man with horn rimmed glasses looked at me with large, fearful eyes.

"…Right…" I straightened my dress, then straightened my head. "Sorry," I nodded to the Maitre d'.

"Bella, please," Edward reached out and brushed my arm, sending a shock to my heart.

"Sir," the Maitre d' cleared his throat. "The woman who you are meeting is right behind you."

"Woman?" I snapped my head back around and eyed the petite busty brunette who was watching this whole thing go down. "You are ready to start dating again? When did that happen?"

"This isn't a date," Edward smirked at me, and his stupid crooked grin made my knees weak. "Why, are you interested?"

"No," I laughed dryly, "just curious, that's all."

"What about you?" Edward narrowed his eyes at the man who I was already ruining dinner with.

"Why, are you interested?" I repeated his words.

"Just curious, that's all," Edward focused his eyes on me. "What happened to Jacob?"

"Jacob and I broke up," I stared at him to see his expression.

"When?" Edward looked somewhere between confused, hurt, and happy.

"A couple days before Valentine's Day."

A couple days before you left, I wanted to say.

We stared at each other for what felt like years. I just wanted to properly remember the color of his eyes. He really did look good. He looked alive and had a deeper sense of confidence I only now realized he was lacking in our final month together.

"Miss," the now annoyed Maitre d' called out. "Please take your seat."

I nodded to him, and looked back at Edward. "Well, goodbye."

Those words would have been much more dramatic if when Edward and I had finally each taken our seat our backs weren't practically touching due to the closeness of the tables.

"Oh this is ridiculous," I sighed to myself.

"Tell me about it," Edward sighed right along with me.

"I am not talking to you!" I hissed. For what must have been the tenth time, I remembered that I was actually having dinner with the slender man in front of me.

"I'm sorry," I tried to smile my best at him. "I was not expecting to see the man behind me, and I was definitely thrown off. Please let me start off fresh. Hi, my name is Bella."

I held out my hand out to him, and the poor guy obviously shook it just out of courtesy. "Hello, my name is Edmund." Huh, so Alice wasn't lying when she said his name was similar to Edward's.

"Ha! That's rich, dating some guy who's name is like mine," a velvety voice whispered from behind me.

"I am not dating him!" I whispered/yelled at him.

"Err… so you are Alice's friend?" Edmund stared me at with an aggravated expression.

"Yes, we have been best friends for years now," I nodded, just happy that Edward didn't interrupt me again. "How do you know Alice?"

It turned out that Edmund here is a talker, and not a very interesting one at that. Just asking a simple question turned into an in depth conversation, on his part, about how he is her tax guy, and how he saved her some money on this year on taxes.

I nodded my head in the right places, smiled and looked like I was paying attention, but in actuality, my attention was slowly drifting to the conversation between Edward and his skanky date.

"Wow, so like, I've seen you on like websites and stuff. You're like a piano guy, right?" the girl's voice was like nails on chalkboard.

"I'm a pianist, yes," Edward's voice was smooth, but I knew his voice well enough to know he was just enduring her.

"Oh!" the slut cried out in a fake sad voice. "I never saw that movie. I hear it's really good. You look a lot like the guy who played the piano in that movie."

"Yeah… Not really, but close," Edward offered in a kind voice.

I cover my mouth with my hand to muffle the laugh that wanted to come out. I tried to bite my tongue, but I couldn't help but wonder out loud, "Does she even know that that movie was about the Holocaust?"

"Do I really look like Adrian Brody?" Edward whispered back to me.

"I am not talk to you," I whispered and did a quick check to make sure Edmund was still rambling on about I-don't-care what.

"It sure sounded like you were talking to me." I could practically hear his smile. "You really shouldn't listen in on other people's conversations," he teased.

I kept my hand hovering over my mouth, trying to be discreet. "I'm just not good at blocking out stupidity which why I heard her, and why I'm talking to you."

"So you are talking to me…"

"Shut up!"

"Excuse me?" Edmund clearly heard my last little remark.

"I said… what's up… with that new tax law coming soon?" I smiled at him hoping that he wouldn't question my lame cover up, and sure enough, he went on talking about some law that I thought I had just made up.

"Nice cover," Edward joked behind me.

I didn't say anything.

"What?" he sounded kind of hurt. "You aren't going to keep talking to me?"

I didn't say anything.

"Alright, well really you just need to listen. Bella, I am so…"

"You should really pay attention to your date," I cut him off.

He didn't respond, and I couldn't help but try to listen to his conversation rather than Edmund explaining how this new tax law differed from the old.

"I am so happy that two adults can spend time like this, and _not be on a date_," Edward spoke up a little louder than he needed.

"Yeah, I know that Alice said that this wasn't going to be like a date or anything, but I was thinking that like you wouldn't mind calling it that," the slut sounded so nonchalant about it. "I mean, you are going to be like a really big star."

"You see, that was not my point here," Edward sounded slightly panicked. "What I was trying to get across was that you and I are able to sit here and have it _not_ be a date. Isn't that nice?"

"I don't get it," said the walking hot air balloon.

There was silence before I heard a glass collide with glass, and felt Edward jump back into his chair crashing into mine. I wanted to turn around and see what happened, but Edmund was giving me an 'are you listening?' look, so I kept my focus on him.

I could hear the idiot apologizing about something, and this time she sounded like she was right next to Edward.

"I am soooooo sorry," she apologized, as if extending a vowel would prove just how sorry she was.

"It's alright, it's just water," Edward sounded a little frazzled. "Really, you don't have to wipe it up, I've got it. Just, please, sit down."

I heard the nameless ho go back to her seat. "I'm sorry, I'm like really clumsy."

"Yeah, right, she did that on purpose." The words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"So you are listening?" Edward didn't even start a fake conversation so that his date would at least be able to think that he was talking to her. He just flat out addressed me while still facing her.

"You really shouldn't be so rude to your date," I whispered to him without turning around.

"I already explained to you that she is not my date," Edward continued to speak in his regular voice.

"Um, Edward, who are you talking to?" the poor girl asked.

Edward ignored her again and went on to talk to me. "Besides, why are you so hung up about me being on a date?"

Oh, I don't know, maybe because I'm crazy in love with you so the very idea of you spending time with another woman makes me want to hit something, but, at the same time, I'm so angry with you that seeing you actually makes my heart want to stop beating because it realizes just how broken it is.

"I don't care," I growled and continued to face forward.

"You obviously still do care about me, or you wouldn't be getting all upset," he countered.

"Edward…"

"Actually it's Edmund," Edmund interrupted me, "and you shouldn't have asked me about this law if you didn't care."

"Wow, _your_ date sounds like a smart man there," Edward snorted.

"He is not my date!" I finally gave up on whispering, but still refusing to turn around.

"Wait, Edward, you're like still talking to me, right?" the stupid girl whose name I'd never heard asked.

"I am not talking to you anymore," Edward sighed.

"Good, now you can leave and ignore me again for the next few months," I sounded pretty damn snotty.

"I have never met you before!" Edmund gave me a surprisingly dirty look.

"She is not talking to you, you idiot!" Edward raised his voice so Edmund could hear.

"Wait, who am I not talking to?" the idiot sitting across Edward asked.

"You know what? I'm leaving before you get the chance to leave me again." I grabbed my unused napkin, tossed it on the table, and reached down to grab my purse.

"What? You are going to make me pay for this whole thing?" Edmund looked outraged.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed a twenty out of my wallet to help pay for my ice tea.

"If you would just let me explain, you would understand!" I could tell Edward had finally turned around to face me by the volume of his voice.

I stood up, tossed the twenty at Edmund, and spun around to look at Edward.

"You don't deserve a chance to explain! You left me Edward. I told you I wanted to keep being friends, but you chose to separate me from your life." I felt angry tears start to burn, but I would not let them fall; not in front of him.

Edward was still sitting in his chair, looking up at me. "Bella, please give two minutes and I'll show you how sorry I really am."

I took a deep breath, completely enraged. I looked down at Edward and in an eerily calm voice simply stated, "I told you that you are not allowed to say that to me."

I reached behind me and grabbed the glass of ice tea that cost me twenty bucks. It would now be worth every penny.

"You butthead," I splashed the tea into his face, earning a very loud 'Oh my God!' from the idiot brunette who was really not that pretty.

Edward wiped the ice tea from his eyes. "Ok, I deserved that."

I reached over and grabbed Edmund's Sprite, not even checking his expression, and again, threw this drink in Edward's face.

Edward took a deep breath. "Yep, I still deserved that one."

This was surprisingly more fun than I thought, and helped with all the anger I had built up, so it only made sense to grab Edward's drink, a beer (served in a glass thank God) and throw that in his face, too.

"I really do not see how this is helping you at all," Edward stated through the dripping liquid.

"Oh trust me, this is helping big time," I started to walk away, feeling a little better.

"So you will let me apologize then?" Edward called out.

I stopped right by Edward's confused date. I leaned down and patted her shoulder. "You really say 'like' too much." I grabbed her drink, water, and threw that at Edward, too. "There are not enough drinks in this restaurant for me to throw to make me want to listen to your apology." Feeling pretty damn good, I turned on my heel and walked out of there, trying to ignore the realization that every person in the building had been watching that little scene.

As I passed the Maitre d' I paused for a brief second. "Whatever the damage is, call this person, and she will pay for it." I pulled out the business card Alice had given me and handed it over to him.

I was too wound up to call a cab so I decided to walk. The embarrassed blush caused by what I had done started to hit me a about a block from the restaurant. That was also about the time Edward caught up to me.

"You can't just leave like that," Edward panted as he followed me.

"Why? You left me last time," my voice was cold. "Just trying to even the score."

Edward grabbed my arm to stop me from walking and spun me around. I saw that his shirt along with his hair were soaking wet. His eyes were wide, bright green, and held an intensity that made me need to steady myself.

"Bella," he spoke my name like a caress. "I will make it up to you. I promised myself back in high school that I would never hurt you again, and then I not only hurt you, but broke the relationship we had just built. I will make you see how sorry I really am, and I know words are not going to cut it this time."

That actually sounded kind of scary and exciting.

"Why's that giving me a bad feeling?" I asked.

Edward let go of my arm, and a child like smile grew on his face. "Bella, you may not forgive me, but I will do everything in my power to show you that I really am begging for your forgiveness!"

"It better not be illegal," I frowned.

He started to walk backwards to the restaurant. "I'll start tomorrow, 9 a.m. sharp!" he called out before he turned and ran back to the mess in 13 Coins.

I pulled out my cell phone and typed in the number I had memorized long ago. It went straight to voicemail.

"Hi, you've reached Alice. I'm not in right now. If this is Bella, you will thank me for this one day. Until then, I will be in a safe location until you've calmed down."

Beep!

"Alice, you're dead."

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**This chapter, and last chapter, were meant to be on the more lighthearted side, and I hope you were able to feel that change. Things will be going up and funny from here.**

**Next chapter will be called: My Life Would Suck Without You**

**There is a clue in there for what the next chapter will be like, who can guess it????**

**Fallow me on Twitter if you want to know how writing is coming along, and how far I am on chapters and whatnot.**

**OH, and I'm going to be heading out to Dallas Texas for the month of June. Do I have any Texas readers? I've never been so I'm excited. But I will be getting this story out ASAP.**

**I hope you all enjoyed :)**


	27. My Life Would Suck Without You

**WOOP! It is all slowly coming to an end. But I think that with this chapter you can see how it's all coming.**

**I did use some of Kelly Clarkson's "_My Life Would Suck Without You_". Actually I directly used the lines from that song. So I do not own that song or Twilight. Also a thanks to _Edward's-a-beefcake_ she is letting me use a line from her last review. THANK YOU :)**

**And thanks to everyone who reviewed, it was a new record. You all rock!**

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Chapter 27- My Life Would Suck Without You

Bella POV

I didn't get to sleep as fast as I would have liked that night. For the better part of my evening I tried rigorously to track down Alice. Jasper obviously wouldn't tell me where she was, and Rose said she was too proud of Alice's set up to rat her out, and I don't know if Emmett knows where she was but he kept acting like he was going to give me a hint then just laugh at my frustration.

I never actually went out looking for her; it was all done by cell phone. Whenever I would call her cell phone she would change the answering machine, pleading that I understand her.

It was really hard to understand her. She basically just left me out to hang on my own and face the one person that hurt me the most. Alice is just one of those friends who you have to take for who they are. She is a meddling, stubborn, vindictive, sometimes just pure evil. But she has more amazing qualities that out number the bad, the most important; she will always do what she thinks is best for me. It would be too selfish of me to judge her when she takes me for all of my annoying qualities.

I had to admit though, it was really nice to see Edward kissing ass like that. Although he didn't deserve a chance to explain, it felt good to see that he seemed sorry, even if he didn't really mean it.

With the first Edward sighting in months, I went to bed emotionally drained, and a little scared. He said that he would make it up to me at 9 am the next day, was that just talk, or did he mean it?

I woke up to the aroma of pancakes, bacon, eggs, coffee, and biscuits. Alice was trying to get on my good side. Opening my eyes, I turned to see the clock on my bedside table; it was 9:45 am. I was at first shocked that I managed to sleep in so late, and second that I didn't hear Alice making breakfast. Another little part of me was sad that on the first day Edward had yet again managed to let me down. I didn't even realize that I was anticipating whatever it was that he was going to do but, I just need to get over that.

I grabbed my baby blue robe that stopped short just bellow my butt. It was a present from Rose, telling me that even at home, alone, relaxing, I need to stay sexy. But it was made out of a really comfy fabric so I used it.

"Alice-soon-to-be-Whitlock," I called out as I slowly walked out to the kitchen. "A simple breakfast isn't going to make up for what you did."

"I didn't think so, but I thought it would be a good start," Edward looked over to me and smiled in a way that shouldn't be done to someone who just woke up, it's too damn dazzling.

I shrieked, yes actually shrieked in a completely girly and annoying kind of way.

"What the hell are you doing?" I demanded while I bunched up my robe, although he has seen me in less.

"Making you breakfast," Edward shrugged as if him standing in my kitchen for the first time in a month was the most natural thing to happen.

"Why are you in my apartment?" my voice was still unnaturally high and had to put an effort to bring it back down to normal. "This is illegal, it's breaking and entering!"

"Actually I forgot I had a spare key that I never returned to you, so really it's just entering," Edward went back to focusing on the pancake he was making. "But if you need an excuse, you can just say that I'm checking your water pressure."

I flushed. He was giving me the same excuse I used when I snuck into his room, way back then.

I decided to ignore his comment. "What are you doing cooking? You can't cook." As amazing as it all smelled, I was having some serious doubts of whether or not it would taste alright.

"You are right," Edward nodded as he kept his focus on the next pancake, and picked at the bacon. "I'm a pretty bad in the kitchen, but I practiced last night right after I left 13 Coins."

For the first time, I let myself take a good look at him. There were dark circles under his eyes, and the shirt he had on, that he bought from , was inside-out. His hair looked like he had ran his fingers through it a few times, whether out of concern for how it looked, or out of frustration I really didn't know.

"Edward, did you sleep at all last night?" I asked, and tried to ignore the tingling sensation I got by saying his name.

"Yes Bella," he rolled his eyes, and I tried to ignore the tingle again when he said my name. "I slept when the biscuits were in the oven, which is how I learned never to sleep when things are in the oven."

I shook my head, exasperated. "God, Edward, you can't come in here making breakfast, as if you never moved out! It is disrespectful and… are those chocolate chip pancakes?"

"Yes, and I have whip cream right here," he grabbed the plates filled with food to the table where we had eaten breakfast together so many times. "Just have a few bites, and if you don't like, I'll give it to Emmett."

I sat down begrudgingly, but damn it all, I have a weak spot for chocolate chip pancakes.

"I'm not cleaning up the mess," I muttered as I grabbed a fork and stabbed a chunk of scrambled eggs.

"Never would dream of it."

Edward was smart enough to know not to sit with me, and kept to himself in the kitchen.

Was it weird to have Edward back in the apartment so casually? Yes

Was I having a battle inside my mind on whether I should be allowed to enjoy this moment, or should I have just rejected his food? Hell yes.

Was I seriously questioning how the hell Edward had learned to cook like this in one night? You know it.

After I was done eating, Edward promptly grabbed the plates, refilled my coffee, and dropped off the newspaper and mail; I gave him a look that actually made him blush.

"Well, you're not kicking me out," he shrugged and ducked back into the kitchen; answering my unasked question.

I can't deny that the man was trying. But was one day of redemption worth letting him sit down and let him apologize? As much as the part of me that already wanted to hear him say those words grew with hope that he may be really sorry, I knew that this wasn't enough. Making breakfast, cleaning dishes that he dirtied, making a cup of coffee that really only included pouring water into the machine.

What he did here this morning was nice, but did he mean it? Will he keep it up? All I knew was that it was too soon to tell if he was really sincere.

After he scrubbed down the kitchen, and I had read as much of the paper that I can stand, we reached a very awkward moment.

"So are you going to make lunch, then a six course dinner?" I hated the fact that I fell so into the rhythm with being comfortable with him, so I made sure to add a slight bitchy tone.

Edward gave me my favorite crooked grin of his, and I could tell that he saw right through the bitchy front. "I can always make it a seven course dinner if that's not enough."

There was a moment where things almost seemed to have fallen back in place. I was with my best friend again, we were both smiling, and everything was good again.

But everything was not good again, and I couldn't let this moment make everything better. He still needed to prove to me that he was sorry, and one morning, one breakfast, one smile was not going to make it all better.

I dropped my smile and put on a more neutral look. "Look, I'm really busy today, so…"

"Right," Edward took a half a step back, giving me the space I needed. "So I'll be heading out, if you need anything let me know. But this is just day one so I'll see you tomorrow."

"You are going to get really annoying, really fast if you keep this up," I was happy that my voice sounded bored.

"Since when were you ever bored when I'm around?" he asked with a cocky look.

I turned away and bit my lip not wanting to agree. I heard Edward walk out the front door, but this time I didn't feel the dread when I heard that door close. If anything I felt excitement and hope. Hope that Edward had crushed the last time.

I went on throughout my day trying to figure out if this breakfast and that moment between us changed anything, but it was hard enough trying to focus on just that. I was struggling not to daydream about Edward making me breakfast in bed everyday.

My head was so confused about what I wanted to do about Edward, that I knew I couldn't see him again that day without completely loosing it. But Edward didn't show up, so he must have been aware of what was going on in my mind. Minus the part about being in love with him of course and that just made all of this more confusing.

I need a bubble bath.

When I got out of the bath I saw that I had a miss call from Alice. I wasn't sure if it was the bubble bath that relaxed me or the fact that Edward really was trying to make an effort after seeing him at the restaurant yesterday, but I couldn't hold a grudge against Alice anymore.

She answered on the first ring.

"Bella I am so sorry!" she panted into the phone. It kind of scared me; I've never heard her this freaked out before. "I should have told you that Edward would be there, or have asked you if it was ok first. But I only really wanted to make things better between the two of you, and no one knows why you guys stopped being friends, I mean really, do you even know; besides the fact that he became a total asshole. But why did he become like that, that is the real question here and I think you deserve the answer and maybe be friends with him again?"

The impressive part was that she said that all in one breath.

"I am happy to hear that you realized that you are in the wrong," I smiled, but I kept my voice stern. If she can mess with me, then I can mess with her. "And that you overstepped your friend's boundaries," I hear her moan in distress. "And that you need to consult with me when it comes to my feelings and my life." She is making little whining sounds. "But your plan seemed to have worked in some weird twisted way you evil little pixie."

I hear her gasp before she exploded. "Oh Bella! I knew it would work, that the moment the two of you saw each other, with nothing holding either of you back, you guys would finally be able to…"

"Alice!" I cut in. "I didn't say that your plan worked completely. Edward and I didn't go running into each other's arms." As nice as that would have been… "I haven't forgiven him yet, Alice. He hurt me, again. And I can't just wave that all away like I did the first time. Fool me once, shame on him; fool me twice, shame on me. I'm not going to be an idiot again."

Alice was quiet, either taking it all in, or debating on how to approach me I didn't know.

"Maybe if you knew why he did what he did…"

I stopped Alice before she could finish that thought. "No! Why should I even give him that chance? If I do let him explain, then I'm going to be thinking of excuses for him and forgive him without even getting a real apology; because an 'I'm sorry' is not going to cut it."

"Well you said that it kind of worked," Alice changed the course of the subject, not so tactfully. "How do you mean it worked?"

I bit my lip. How much do I want to tell her? How much information do I want to give her that she can use to hold over my head?

"We talked, and I didn't cry." There, that didn't give away how much I was in love with him. "And he said he wanted to apologize, to show me how sorry he was." I smiled against my will as I thought about him breathless, smiling like a little boy, making a promise that I couldn't allow myself to hope that he would actually hold true.

"That is progress!" cheered Alice. "How is he going to apologize?"

"He showed up this morning, well broke into the apartment really. And he made me breakfast," this time you could hear the smile in my voice, something that Alice didn't miss.

"Oh I bet it was just like old times!" Alice was all excited. "The way you two banter back and forth, it is just so cute!"

"We did not banter today." That didn't count as bantering did it? "We actually didn't talk that much, which I'm really ok with. I don't think I could've had him being back in my place and talking like old times, not with the way things are."

"Bella, what does he need to do to prove how sorry he is?" asked Alice.

I thought about that question. For the past few months I had thought that Edward didn't even want redemption, so the thought of what he needed to do to make it all better hadn't even crossed my mind.

Was there a secret formula that Edward needed to follow to make all this pain, and all this hurt, go away?

A part of me wanted to say yes, that he just needed to say whatever words and we can go back to the way things were. But we could never be the same again.

First: I am in love with Edward, and this is a consuming kind of love, that defines my very soul, it was to irrevocable to have things go back to the way things were; when we were just friends.

Second: He hurt me. Hurt me so badly that I didn't want to get back up in the morning. I was able to pass off his first offence as a matter of peer pressure, and a young boy not knowing what to do. But this is a different matter completely. I wanted to know what was wrong, to fix it, but he continued in his own depression, bringing our relationship down with him.

It didn't even matter anyway. Where I stand now, I know I am not ready to forgive him, but I am on the road. That's if Edward really means all this.

"Bella, Bella!" Alice's voice snapped me out of my mind.

"Sorry, I just… was thinking."

"And?"

"And… time." I could feel that I was right when I said it. "To make things better I need time."

"Now is that just time, or time alone?" Another good question from Alice.

"Just time," because really I am too selfish to say no to the idea of Edward being back in my life; even if it's not quite where I want us to be. I wanted time with Edward.

I went to bed that day in a better mood than I have been in a month. I have been doing a lot of things that I haven't done in months.

I woke up and sniffed the air.

No breakfast.

I had to admit, I was slightly disappointed.

I shouldn't have been hoping to see Edward there, with breakfast all ready and waiting for me. I would get too spoiled and I would forget why I was even angry at him if he kept making those chocolate chip pancakes.

I grabbed my robe, just because I had forgotten just how comfortable it really was, and opened my door to walk out to the living room. And there, standing as if it was the most natural thing in the world, stood Edward holding what looked like dry cleaning and a basket of laundry beside him.

"Starting to get a little creepy," I walked past him, but he held out a cup of coffee to me.

"No breakfast today," Edward sounded a little sad. "I couldn't figure out how to make anything else, and I thought I could keep living off the glory of yesterday."

"Glory died the moment I finished my last bite," I sipped my coffee.

Edward looked disappointed, as if I had confirmed what he had thought. He shook that look off and there was that hopeful smile again. "Anyways, I got your dry cleaning for you, and did your laundry."

I looked at the see through plastic sheet to see that it was indeed my dry cleaning, which I have been avoiding picking up. It wasn't a hard chore to do, just one I hated.

"Laundry?" I repeated, and stared back down to the basket beside him. "How did you…?"

I kept my laundry in a hamper, in my closet, in my room, in my apartment; that must mean that…

"I snuck in last night and got everything so you would have fresh clothes today," he smiled broadly.

"You broke into my place again, snuck into my room, and got all of my dirty clothes?" I gaped at him.

"Well… if you put it like that," he blushed.

"Pretty soon you will be sneaking into my room every night and watch me sleep," I mumbled.

"Please, I'm not that much of a freak," Edward grinned. "I know how much you hate doing these kinds of chores so I thought I would do it for you."

I stared at him, not sure if I should be kind of creeped out, or if I should feel all good inside like I was right now.

"I promise that I will not go sneaking into your room again, and that I didn't steal any of your panties," Edward gave a mischievous grin as if he was trying to intend that he wasn't being truthful in that last part.

I blushed, and actually let a little giggle out; then caught myself. Edward just made a slightly dirty joke, or some form of sexual innuendo towards me!

He never did that, and if he ever said anything even dirtier than that I never got all hot and bothered by it.

The heat in my face, transferred to a heat in a different place.

Edward was studying my face, and by the smirk on his face it seems like he got the reaction he wanted.

I snatched my dry cleaning from him and held my head high, "I'll be changing." Points for me for having a steady voice.

"I'll be imagining."

Thank God I already turned away from him, because it would be too obvious that I was wishing he was being honest.

I had some more chores to do around the house, like dusting, and taking out the trash and recycle, and changing light bulbs that I had been putting off for too long.

Edward stayed longer this time. He helped me out before there was an awkward moment for me to kick him out. We didn't talk as much, but the silence between us wasn't so defining. And whatever we did talk about only involved whatever task we were doing.

But really, it wasn't as if we could be catching up with each other. That would be a bad conversation on my end. 'While you were out recording and becoming successful, I stayed at home and cried my weight out in tears.'

Yeah, not something I wanted to share.

There was something different with him too. His attitude; he's been trying to show me that he's sorry, but he's also been… flirty?

He didn't say much, but the way he would smile at me, the way he grinned, the way he… just was.

I wasn't sure if this was how he was trying to get into my good graces again, or if my mind was starting to project things I wanted to see. Neither of those were good choices.

Edward excused himself after all the chores were done and I felt like the apartment was a little emptier. I had to admit that Edward made my life a little more interesting.

The following day I woke up with very mixed emotions, which tends to piss me off.

I woke up that day almost excited about seeing Edward and what he was going to do today. Then I remembered how angry I was with him, and the fact that he hurt me and that I shouldn't be forgetting about it so easily. I still didn't know why he did all the things he did, so I was still left in the dark, which pissed me off even more.

But in this situation I could only be mad at myself. A part of me, a small but growing part of me, wanted to forgive him, was saying that I could forgive him. After just two days, of no explanation, I wanted to say 'ok, everything is better.'

Ok, I just need to reason this out with myself. At this moment in time, should I forgive Edward? Well that is a big, fat no. I still don't know a damn thing that went on in his mind during that time.

However he was willing to tell me, only I was the one putting a stop to that. Because let's face it, when it comes to Edward, I'm not that strong. So I could let him tell me, as long as he leaves right away, so I can work it out in my head afterwards.

But that angry and hurt side of me keeps yelling, saying that I'm on the road of letting him off too easily.

Yet, I want him back in my life.

Oh boy, here we are to the heart of this dilemma. Do I stay so prideful that I make Edward work for forgiveness, to the point where even the most remorseful person would have to call it quits? Or do I just come to terms and realize what I want in my life at all costs, even if it is a hit to my pride, and heart?

The million dollar question.

Can't I find a healthy medium? Somewhere in the middle where I can make peace with what he did, but still have him back with me, even if it is only as a friend…

Alright! So the game plan now is that I will let him explain to me, I work that out, make him apologize a bit more, and when I feel like we can move on, to be friends again.

That sounds reasonable… Why do I feel like I'm going to start hyperventilating any second?

I walked out of my room, all ready for my day after dragging a brush through my hair and throwing on a dark blue tank top and some blue jeans. But Edward was not to be found.

A part of me wanted to start crying, in fear that he had already given up. But then that would have meant he wasn't in this to start with. And he said he would make it up to me, so I guess I need to have faith in him.

When I opened my refrigerator, my faith in Edward only grew. He had done all of my grocery shopping sometime during the night, and snuck it all in here. As I grabbed the new carton of orange juice, I couldn't help but wonder two things. One, where the hell did he find a grocery store that late? And two, I should probably invest in buying a home security if it's this easy to get into my apartment.

Edward never showed up that day, and I missed him completely. But he did text me through out the day. Small things at first like: **This rain is even too much for the fish! Wonder where 'raining cats and dogs' came from. What made them so special?**

And I spent the better part of the afternoon curled up on the couch, sipping the hot chocolate that Edward had bought last night, and text messaged with the very man himself.

We talked about absolutely nothing that made sense, but that is what made our conversations so great. We never needed a purpose to talk to one another, other than wanting to spend time with each other. And now we had that back.

I was getting ready for bed as I eyed my cell. I already come to the conclusion that I should at least let Edward explain himself. Yet the conclusion and actual execution were not on the same level.

Thank God for technology, I don't even have to hear his voice, or show how shaky mine is. Just a few swift punches, then: **10 am, come over and you can explain. But the deal is you need to leave right away, good or bad.**

Good or bad what, I didn't know. But hopefully he got the gist of it.

Not even 30 seconds later: **Thank you**.

I glanced at my bed and sighed; there was no way I'd be sleeping tonight.

Why had I told him to come over so late? 10 AM, it felt like hours had gone by and the time for him to be here was still only… oh God, only 15 minuets left!

Maybe it felt like hours had gone by, because I woke up at 6, and hours really were inching by. I kept asking myself what I was expecting from him, and every excuse I thought of just didn't seem like enough. Was I expecting this confession to somehow solve all my problems, and make everything better? Hell if I'm daydreaming of the impossible I might as well think of him declaring his love to me.

Yeah, I wasn't going to have my hope crushed at all today. I really do sound like a bitch when I'm sarcastic, even to myself.

I wasn't sure if I should have some coffee or tea out, or if I should have some kind of food to pick at while we talk. What was proper edict when it comes to this stuff? When did I start caring about edict? Why am I asking for so many freaking questions?

Luckily the knock on the door knocked me out of my freak out. With shaky hands, and a wavering breath, I made my way to the door and was even able to compose a kind of forced smile.

I opened the door.

"What, no breaking and entering today?" I asked with an unnaturally high voice.

He didn't say anything at first, but just stared at me.

"Breath Bella," Edward whispered, still standing in the frame of the door.

I wanted to yell at him that when he looked at me like that, with such caring, deep, passionate eyes; I didn't stand a chance at breathing. But I forced myself to look away from him and take a deep breath.

He walked in. "Well I figured I wanted to be on your good side today, so I better abide by your request and stay legal." Although Edward was able to make the mood a little lighter, even I could sense the tension coming off from him.

"Do you want anything to drink?" I asked as I walked with him to the living room.

"No thanks, I don't want to risk the chance of you having something to throw at me." Edward had a type of flirtatious grin as he said that, and I blushed from his grin and from the memory.

"Yeah, I would say sorry about it, but I'm not sorry." I shrugged. "So why lie?"

Edward laughed, and I felt it on my skin, on every nerve, and hair on my body. I missed his laugh, so much. I didn't even realize that until now. It felt good when I was able to laugh again, but to hear him laugh I felt like everything was right.

I was definitely going to have to get straight to the point if I wanted a clear head to deliberate this.

With another calming breath, I put my game face on and Edward could tell right away where I was going. "Alright, go."

"Bella, Jasper is the only friend I have ever really been close to. Lauren and I were never friends, even when we dated I knew she wasn't a best friend. So the friendship I had with Jasper was the only thing I knew, it _means_ a lot more to me than people will ever know.

But when I started living here, when you and I started to be friends, I realized we weren't just friends. Not like I was friends with the tons I people I met in high school and through out life. You and I had something more. Different in the way Jasper and I are friends, and in some ways I think what you and I have is more.

You know me completely, and yet you still want me around. You've seen me scared, sad, angry, hurt, excited, confused, remorseful, determined, and happy. You have seen every side of me, and yet you still wanted me around. That means more, so much more than anything in my life."

He paused there. And I took it in.

He cared about me. That thought made the tears flood to my eyes. I had spent these past months thinking that he never cared for me like I had for him. That I had fooled myself in thinking that I was able to make a connection with another human being, which was different then being in love; it was able to bind two people's hearts aligned because of their complete acceptance for one another.

"So then, why?" I managed to say without the tears spilling out.

I waited for him to say something, but when he didn't I looked up. It looked like he wanted to say something, but was not sure if he should. We stared at each other for a few more minutes and his expression changed. His smile was gentle and it felt like he was caressing my face with his eyes.

"I was jealous," he did a half shrug. "Jacob wasn't just taking you away; he was taking away what we had. It wasn't necessarily your time that I was upset about losing, we had spent weeks where you and I were both busy and didn't spend any time together. But it seemed different with Jacob. He was such an ass, but you didn't see it. He hated me just as much as I hated him from the beginning, and you didn't see it."

"I knew you two didn't like each other, but it was from the very beginning?" I don't know why this came as a surprise, but for some reason I had always thought that their dislike for one another had come later.

Edward ran a hand through his hair, and for the first time his cool demeanor started to slack.

"That was what made me so mad at you," his voice was a little more gruff. "You said we were best friends, you claimed that you knew me so well, yet you had no idea what your relationship with him was doing to me. He was such an asshole and you had no freaking idea!"

"How am I supposed to know that you didn't like him, if you never told me," I stiffened my back.

"I know when you're scared, or confused, or angry with just glancing at you," he stared me down. "And you have proven that you can do that to me too. So don't you say that you didn't know!"

"I knew something was up," I admitted. "But maybe I just didn't want to see." In those months, I was being selfish. I wanted to date Jacob, but have Edward still be a big part of my life even when I knew that it couldn't happen. But I still tried, and it hurt Edward more than I thought.

"So I understand why you were so angry during those months, but still, why did you say those things to me? Why did you..." I had to take a shaky breath to finish. "Why did you leave me?"

I heard Edward let out a breath that rattled with just as much emotion as mine. "I am so sorry," was all he said as we sat in silence, trying to regain ourselves.

"I don't want this to be my 'excuse' because there is no excuse for what I did," he hung his head. "But I was so angry with you. Everyday the two of you were together, was another day that I was losing one of the most precious things to me, and it looked like it wasn't even fazing you.

I know now, looking back, that you were just trying to keep the calm in the house. You were trying to keep things light and natural between us. But I thought that you were just unfazed by it all. And in a complete moment of weakness I said something to make you hurt as much as I was hurting. I knew I was wrong and I was being a monster the moment I said it."

He did a kind of hysterical laugh. "I was so disgusted with myself. Here I was angry that you were being taken away from me, and yet I was pushing you away just as much. The one thing that I kept so close to my heart, that helped me through one of the hardest times in my life, and I hurt you and betrayed you.

I'm so sorry."

I stared at my lap and shook my head, the tears fighting to come up. But I had cried enough, and I would not shed any in front of him.

"Someone," I slowly started. "Who is actually remorseful, doesn't ignore the problem for months!"

"I was so ashamed of myself Bella," Edward cried; he looked like he might have been fighting back a few tears himself. "You were hurting and I wanted to remove the problem, and that problem was me."

"And you just made the decision without me?" I yelled. "My life died when you left. You are just as important to me, as you say I am to you! You can't just make that decision all on your own; it effected me too!"

Edward stared at me, eyes wide with his plea. "I'm sorry Bella, I'm so sorry."

We were quiet again for a few minutes before Edward continued.

"When I left, I thought that I needed to fix myself. If that was how I treated someone I held dear to me, then I did not want to be that person. Before I could come back and beg for you to forgive me, I needed to make myself a man worth forgiving."

"And are you a man worth forgiving?" I asked.

"I can look at myself in the mirror now. It was actually two days before I saw you at the restaurant that I told Alice that I thought I can face you, but I can never be a man worth being in your life."

"That is for me to decide not you. Last time you made a pretty crappy decision." I grinned.

"You always were the smarter one," Edward grinned back.

"Kissing my ass will not be helping you," I gave him a stern look. I softened my gaze. "I am still really angry with you, and I admit that I contributed to our downfall, but in the end you finished it."

"I understand," Edward stood up. "But I'll keep showing you that I'm sorry."

I nodded, not quite letting myself soak in everything he just told me.

"Good or bad," Edward caught my attention. "I leave, good or bad. So, I'll see you later."

Good or bad. Was his explanation good or bad? I know Edward, and I know he wasn't lying. So his explanation was pretty damn good as far as explanations go. I just have to come to terms that I caused a whole lot of our problems. Maybe I should be asking for forgiveness.

Edward really did know me. He knew not to call me the next day and let me think things out, although there really wasn't much to think out. I hurt my best friend, and my best friend hurt me. At this point it was all a matter of pride, my natural stubbornness was not helping.

The following day I decided to get out of the house and walk around to get some fresh air and all that jazz. It had been raining nonstop for the past few days, so there were puddles in every little indentation in the ground. I picked a great day to go walking around in my favorite pair of Jimmy Choo's.

I had managed to avoid some of the puddles, but was blocked by a little mini lake; at least it looked like a mini lake. Ok not really that big, but when you're wearing a $200 pair of shoes, small messes seem a lot bigger. Oh I wish Alice could hear me, she would be so proud.

I had barely even made it a block away from my apartment, and I was going to be forced to turn back around and call defeat all because of a stupid puddle.

"Stupid puddle," I muttered to myself.

"Yeah, definitely not smart of you to wear your favorite pairs of shoes when there are puddles everywhere you go," Edward spoke right into my ear.

I screamed, partly out of shock, partly out or embarrassment, and partly because his breath right over my ear kind of turned me on. Looking at Edward, I wasn't sure what I should feel. Should I still be angry? Should I say that I forgave him? One thing's for sure, I was feeling a whole lot of love for him.

"Sorry, I thought you heard me walk up," Edward smile broadly, which I knew meant that he was lying.

"It's one thing to sneak into my apartment, it's another to be completely stalking me," I huffed. I really hate being scared.

Edward raised an eye brow. "Someone's ego is getting a little big. I was just stopping by Emmett's office and I was on my way home. It was a complete coincidence that I found you talking to yourself about a puddle."

I blushed. "You shouldn't listen to other people's conversations; even if I was talking to myself."

I crossed my arms, and had to bite my lip to stop myself from pouting. If it wasn't for that stupid puddle…

I heard Edward sigh as he started to shrug off his coat. Sure it was summer time, but that last storm brought in some kind of cold front that made wearing a coat almost a must.

And then Edward did something that I thought was only done in old movies and never in real life. He laid his coat out over the puddle for me to walk over.

I gaped at him. "You just ruined a perfectly good coat."

"Well you wanted to walk across," he shrugged.

"There are other ways," I argued.

"Look the coat is already down, just walk across please?"

With a hesitant step I walked across the mini lake. Who knew, it really worked.

"Thank you," I watched Edward kneel down to pick up the now ruined coat. "That was very sweet and very wasteful of you."

"True, but it got you across," Edward folded the coat over his arm and realized it was completely soaked through with muddy water.

He made a face and walked over to a near by stand where a woman was surrounded by boxes of what looked like used clothes. I didn't even see the donation drive going on.

"It's dirty, and wet, but once it's dry it should be a perfectly good coat," Edward smiled to the 40 year old looking soccer mom. If I didn't know any better, I would have said that she came in her pants just by his smile.

I did a mental shrug. I knew that feeling.

Edward walked over to me and I kept walking straight. "I did a good deed and a good donation."

"Apparently modesty is not your strong point," I kept my gaze straight ahead.

"Not at all," I heard Edward laugh.

We kept walking a few more blocks. I was able to dodge a few more puddles, yet Edward kept pace right beside me.

"Are you following me?" I asked.

"I don't want you to ruin your shoes," his sarcasm very evident. "I wouldn't want to piss Alice off."

I looked at Edward and surveyed what he had on. Under the coat, he had on one of his grey sweatshirts that he never really liked. He probably had on some other shirt underneath, but I couldn't see.

I stalled my steps to another freakishly large puddle. Not quite big enough for me to jump, and too long for me to go around.

In the corner of my eye I saw Edward taking off his sweatshirt. I did a really weird nervous laugh.

"You are seriously going to…" Before I could even finish my thought, Edward had already placed the sweatshirt over the puddle.

"Really?" I stared up at him. "I don't have to keep walking. You don't have to do this."

"Well I want to and since I already put it down, you should keep walking only out of politeness."

"You are so stubborn," I mumbled to myself.

Once I was over, I kept walking instead of waiting for him. He caught up to me, and didn't have the sweatshirt with him. Wonder what he did with it.

We walked in another stretch of silence. Not one of our perfectly comfortable silences, but still bearable. It was clear we were both in our own little world.

When I came to a stop, I knew my walk was over.

This really was a mini lake. Edward and I had wandered over to the local park, and in one of the main paths the road dips down. The road was completely flooded, and if any person were to try and step through it would get their legs wet up to their calves.

On the other side of this mini lake was a main street where I would probably end up taking a taxi back home. That is where I want to be. But since there was no way in crossing, I would have to go back, but have to cross all of those other puddles as well. In conclusion; I was stranded.

"I don't think your shirt will help me get across this one," I nodded my head in the direction of the mini lake, although a mental image of a shirtless Edward made me want to grin.

"No it will not." Edward had a serious look on his face, when he turned to me.

"What?" I took a step back.

"Either you cross this monster puddle, or a dozen little puddles," he spoke more to himself I think.

"Ok…"

And in one swift movement Edward literally swept me off my feet. He scooped my knees out from under me, and caught my back before it fell. It made me feel like I was a feather or a rag doll or a something really small and skinny.

"What are you doing?" I gasped, clinging to my purse and his neck.

With a crooked smile he did a really awkward one shoulder shrug while I was still in his arms. "This is the faster, more direct way to the other side."

I mumbled. "Why did the Edward cross the road?" My own lame adaptation. "Edward put me down; you will get all wet walking down that thing."

I started try to shift my legs out of his arms, but he was not letting go. "I am determined to get every item of clothing I have on wet with pond water." He joked.

He walked easily enough to the mini lake, but after the first step in he hesitated.

"Cold?" I asked.

"No, just kind of slippery."

"Edward, if it is even remotely slippery!" I warned.

"It's fine."

I had only thought about the water, not the fact that he had to walk on the road which dipped down hill, then up.

I could tell we reached the middle, when Edward let out a sigh.

"Hard part's done," he looked very accomplished. "It's all down hill from here… or really up hill."

"Yeah, you lose a few points for the lame joke," I teased.

"Hey, I didn't say a thing about your 'why did the _chicken_ cross the road' joke," Edward grinned.

"True, but….ahhhh!"

He slipped.

Edward Genius Masen, slipped while walking up hill, the easier side. And I fell right along with him.

I had to hand it to him though, he made damn sure that he took the blunt of the fall, he even tried to lift me so that I wouldn't crash into the water. A valiant attempt, but futile none the less.

I never should have gone walking in my Jimmy Choo's.

We both yelled from the initial shock, then fell into uncontrollable laughing. We laughed as we helped one another up, and made both of our ways up the stupid hill.

"You are such an idiot!" I laughed as I evaluated the damage. Yep only my rear was entirely soaked.

"You were distracting me!" he laughed right along with me. He was drenched.

We laughed some more, but as a cold wind blew past us, it sobered me up.

"Well, I need to get going," we had walked out to the street and I waved my hand to a cab.

The car pulled up and I turned to Edward. "Thanks for trying to save my shoes."

I was about to slide in when Edward grabbed my hand. "Bella, I still need to apologize."

"It's alright Edward, I should never have walked across your coat to begin with."

"Not that," his face became somber. "I need time to do it, and this is not it. I'll see you tomorrow, and I'll come and apologize again."

I nodded, not sure of what to say, and slid back in the cab. I gave him the address and watched Edward as we pulled away. I wanted all this pain to go away, but above everything else, I just wanted to be able to love Edward and have him love me back. But you can't always get what you want.

The next day the stars were not aligned, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, I didn't get enough sleep; either way, I was in a bad mood. It was just one of those days, something everyone goes through, when they wake up and every little thing pisses you off.

I cursed at my toothbrush, glared at my breakfast, and even slapped my mail. I knew I was being a bitch for no apparent reason, and I was fuming at myself for being in such a mood. This happens about once every few years where I'll storm around and just be plain nasty towards people. I now know that on days like these I need to hide out, and just let it pass.

Too bad I needed to go run to the post office to drop off something big, they would not accept being paid online. Oh fan-freaking-tastic!

Even though a lot of the rain puddles had already evaporated, I still put on my least favorite pair of Converse and had on a comfy pair of jeans and blue sweatshirt. This cool air didn't help calm the bubbling heat of the uncalled for anger inside of me. And the more I walked, the more frustrated I became.

After a quick drop off, I marched my way back home, avoiding all eye contact with others. I felt like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and I wanted to save all the pedestrians from the wrath of Bella Hyde.

When the elevator opened to my floor, I twirled my keys in my hand, slightly happy to have not taken out this uncalled-for anger out on anyone.

But no, life can never go my way.

My heart did the familiar flutter when I saw Edward standing outside the apartment. But the Hyde in me laughed in triumph at finally finding someone to lash out at.

"Well, I guess this means your sorry," my voice was flat, and it was clear I was in a foul mood.

Edward didn't seem fazed by it. "Oh?"

"You're standing at my door," I waved to the door as I unlocked it.

"Look, I just came here to apologize again," Edward followed me in. "I'll come everyday if I have to."

"So what everything is better now?" Oh, I sounded like a bitch. "I guess this means you take back all you said before."

I saw Edward had some more bags of groceries in his hands. "What's that?"

"I came to make you a cake," Edward answered defensively and headed to the kitchen.

"You can bake now too?" I sounded incredulous. "What kind of cake is it? 'I'm sorry; we can pretend this never happened!'"

"No," Edward placed the flour bag on the counter a little roughly. "An 'I'm sorry; we belong together' cake."

My heart did more than a little flutter when I heard that. But then I reminded myself that he only meant as 'just friends' and my temper shot back up.

"Well that is so kind of you," I reeked of mock sincerity. "Maybe, we can make a cake, and send it over to the Kim Jong II, and say 'hey, let's get along!'"

"I see you have been watching Team America again," Edward continued to dismiss me.

The Hyde within me was not happy with Edward's lack of reaction. So I decided to change my tactic.

I stayed quiet for a few minutes, glaring at Edward as he stripped the grocery bag of its contents. He was smooth in the kitchen. Why shouldn't he be? He knows where everything is. He was smooth and flawless.

"Careful, you don't want to just _leave _the cake in there too long," I warned in a callous voice. "You know what happens when you _leave_ something for too long? They get burned, and ruined."

"True," Edward nodded; I could hear a slight strain in his voice to keep control. "But if the person who burnt it wants to make things better, they can always scrape off the burnt parts."

Still not reacting.

"Maybe before you put it in the oven, you should pick a fight with it every single day for a month straight." I kept my eyes on him.

Edward closed his eyes, and took some deep breaths. The real side of me was looking on, as this Bella Hyde took over completely. I was hurting him. It was obvious that he was hurting.

_But he hurt you to begin with. _The Hyde within was just searching for an excuse.

But hurt him, then he hurt me, and now I'm hurting him again. Keeping count, I hurt him more. This was wrong. I need to just back off apologize, and get him out of here before I freak out some more.

Yet the Bella Hyde needed the last word.

"I'm just trying to make sure you mess this up also." I went for the kill.

"Yeah, I was wrong for trying to pick a fight," Edward got right in my face. "And I know I was wrong for telling you goodbye. But I am sorry! You should know by now that I feel some type of regret, even if you doubt the extent of how much I really do regret it."

"Why did you wait so freaking long to come and apologize?!" I yelled in frustration.

"I wasn't ready to face you!" he ran a hand through his hair. "You know what I did right after I left that morning?"

He waited to see if I was going to interrupt him. I wasn't.

"I threw up," he took a step back and started to pace the kitchen. "I was so disgusted with myself that I became physically sick. And I was sick for a while after. Even just remembering that day, and the days leading up, I would end up spending the night by the toilet."

Normal Bella would take this information in, and see just how much he was affected by his leaving me. Bella Hyde? Oh no, I just have to rub some salt in the wound, and then squeeze a lemon on it too.

I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle from the refrigerator; my voice was surprisingly steady. "Wow, the thought of me makes you want to throw up, and not face your issues? You have some major issues."

Edward grabbed my arm and spun me around. He looked angry, and hurt; but it looked like the anger side was winning out.

"I know that I have issues," he had a little smirk. "But your pretty messed up too."

I jerked my arm away from him. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You can't make up your mind," Edward's stupid, freaking, grin grew. "You want me in your life, but you also wanted Jacob. You want to forgive me, but also what to be mad at me. You want to have your cake, and eat it too."

I hated that feeling when people called me out on my crap, and in my Bella Hyde mood, I hated it even more.

"So you're saying that you are going to make me a cake and I can't have it?" Deliberately not "getting" the point would always make him mad.

"What I'm saying is that you want to have a theoretical cake right in front of you, and theoretically eat it at the same time." Edward moved his hands from one side to another to emphasize his point.

"Why wouldn't I want to eat my theoretical cake Edward?" I forced my question to sound perfectly reasonable.

"That is not the point and you know it," Edward growled.

I leaned against the counter and placed a hand on my hip. "Well then go ahead and explain it to me."

Once Edward was all riled up, and felt like he had a point to prove, he wouldn't stop and only get even angrier.

"When the cake is in front of you, all nice and pretty, you can't eat it because then you don't have your cake." Edward thought about it for a moment, and smiled with a nod.

I can get the smile off.

"But if I ate the cake, then don't I still have it?"

And there goes the smile.

"But it's not in front of you, so you don't have the cake."

"What if I eat half of it, and then will I have had my cake; it would still be in front of me, and I would have eaten it too."

Edward glared at me while I smiled an angel's smile at him.

Bella Hyde was very pleased.

"The point is that you can't have both, even if you try to reason things out. I know you are just trying to mess with me, but you are only proving my point. Even in this scenario you are trying to have both, but it only reflects how you are in real life. Especially with me and Jacob."

Oh how the truth stings.

"So yes, I have some serious issues, and as I have just pointed out, you are most definitely messed up. Either way I found out, I'm nothing without you."

Wow.

"'Cuz we belong together, in our own warped way." Edward went back to his cake baking supplies. He opened the bag of flour and paused. "How does that song go? 'Forever united here, somehow.'"

I walked up beside him and leaned against the counter. How could I be mad at him? Hell how could I be mad at anyone after that?

Edward let out a playful laugh. "Why else would I be stuck with you after so long?" He added another little laugh, and bumped into my shoulder lightly to show that he was kidding.

On a normal Bella day, I would laugh right along with him and go ahead and go where we both know this conversation was going. But not today with my bad mood, not after all of my frustration with him and myself. No.

I reached in the bag of flour, grabbed a handful and blew right into Edward's face.

I started laughing.

"Oh my God, you look white as a ghost," I doubled over and had to hold my stomach.

"No," Edward wiped a bit of flour off his cheek. "Ghosts can't hold anything solid." He reached into the flour bag. "They can't do this."

I already saw where he was going with this, so I was already slightly turned away; diving to grab another handful of flour.

"You are such a jerk!" I half yelled, half laughed as I chucked it at him. Edward was already a few steps back.

Lesson learned: flour does not travel far.

Somewhere, I missed Edward grabbing a handful of his own stash. He ran up to me and smeared it right into my face.

"You are a stubborn worm!" he yelled/laughed at me.

Edward and I continued throwing flour at each other until the bag ran out, which wasn't for another 30 minutes or so.

We went back and forth, with an unspoken rule of leaving the bag on the counter, and not leaving farther than the counter of the kitchen. We would throw it, smear it, toss it in the air, or just a good old fashioned smash on top of the head.

For the first ten minutes we would yell really weird, yet true names. I called him an "abandoning-toad-stool," and "wanna-be-martyr-leopard-print-fool!" My favorite was, "You persistent anteater butthead!"

Edward had a few good ones too. "You passive lamp!" or, "thick headed water bottle!" then, "blind-feather-leaf!"

None of our names made sense. But they didn't hurt, and they were able to help us get the anger we had stored in us out.

The flour? Well that was just a result of my innovated-ness. Either way, I lost my bad temper, he lost an ingredient for the cake, but we both found an even.

We ended up both on the floor of the kitchen, panting. There was a thick layer of flour up in the air finally willing to settle down now that we weren't up kicking it up anymore.

The flour slowly settled around, our release of aggression had brought on a calming atmosphere. Whatever it was that made things clear for me.

I rolled my head to the side where Edward looked to be in the same tired shape that I was. He must have been able to tell that I was looking at him; he rolled his head towards me.

"Being with you," I started slowly as I watched his face. "Is so dysfunctional, I really shouldn't miss you." Edward's face dropped. "But I can't let you go."

It took him a moment to realize what I just said. When he did, he sat and brought me up with him.

"What are you saying here?" he asked with a huge grin. "You're saying what I think you're saying?"

"I'm saying that you have a piece of me," I patted his chest, right over his heart. I wanted to tell him that it was more than just friendship, or love; he really did have a piece of me, of my soul, of who I am.

"And honestly," I leaned back on my arms. "My life would suck without you."

Edward reached over and grabbed me, bringing me into his chest. God, I missed this.

"I missed you so much," he squeezed his arms tight around me. "I missed you."

"I missed you too." I sighed into his chest. "And I'm sorry."

"For what?" Edward pulled back a little to look down at me.

"Everything," I shrugged, hoping he would get it.

It was Edward, my Edward; and he got it.

He nodded his head and brought me back into a hug.

After a few more minutes, selfish minutes on my part, I started to laugh out of control.

"What is it?" asked Edward, slightly laughing along with me.

I shook my head. "After this, Alice is going to think that she knows the best for absolutely everything."

Edward started to laugh too. "Who knows, maybe she does."

And my best friend was back.

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**YAY! They are back together! Wooooop. And I hope you guys don't think that she forgave him too easily, or that his excuse was not good enough. But Bella forgave him, I forgave him. So yeah.**

**Next chapter…. Well, let's just say, stay tuned.**

**It will be called: _Stubbing Toes and Bloody Nose_**

**I'm in Texas, and shout out to all the people who were caught by that storm. It was crazy right? I'm praying that you guys are all alright. I'm loving here (I'm s****taying in the Highlands Park) So, other then a few uprooted trees, we're good here.**

**remember that you can fallow me on my SN is tbjac89**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	28. Stubbed Toes and Bloody Nose

**So here is chapter 28, and it is one of my own personal favorite. Again, thank you to my beta!**

**Some updates: I have been nominated for a couple awards! One with _The Twilight Twins Award_, and another with _Twilight Choice Awards_. I'm so honored just for the nominations, and I saw who I'm up against, and I really like all the stories up there, so just vote for your favorite because I'm happy with the nominations :)**

**And some not so good new: I was informed that a person was stealing my story, and posting them on Wattpad. Just to make this clear: I, Jacqueline Sahlin, have not posted my story, Continuing On, on any other website but fanfiction. I am really disappointed in this person, and I hope that if you ever see anyone stealing _any_ person's story, you will report them.**

**I do NOT own Twilight**

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Chapter 28- Stubbed Toes and Bloody Nose

Bella POV:

"Bella! Just tilt your head back Bella!" Edward's panicked voice called out through the fog. "Open your eyes for me; please open them!"

My head hurts… my nose hurts… and my toe hurts. If I open my eyes, then the light will be really bright and that will hurt my eyes. I want to stop hurting, and I think keeping my eyes closed will help out with that.

Plus, it feels good being here. I can tell Edward is holding me because every sense in my body is telling me so. I can smell him, even though right now I'm open mouthed so that I don't choke back my blood, but I can still get that aroma from him. In turn however I am also able to get a type of taste of him in this way. It's sweet, but still masculine and not over bearing in the slightest. I can hear his heart and his voice. It's probably because of that last blow to the head I'm not really thinking straight; but I imagine that the sound waves of Edward's voice are like dancing stars making their way into my ear. Oh yeah, that last hit had a kick to it.

If I were to open my eyes, I would probably see the painful beauty that is Edward Masen, but seeing as I ruled that out, I am left with my last since (and in this case my favorite), feel.

He has his left arm warped around my back, cradling me really, with his hand firmly grasping my arm. My arm tinged and the nerves seemed to have a direct line from my arm to the butterflies in my stomach; making them work over time. Edward had me so that it I was sitting up, so my legs and my rear were on the hard floor. But I wasn't really focusing on that area; my face was where all of senses were focusing in. He was petting my face, rather franticly and spreading some blood as he did so. I can tell that as he whispered quickly to me to open my eyes, he was outlining my cheekbones.

See, I have a pretty good deal going on for me here. No need to open my eyes.

"Bella! Please!" Edward's voice sounded so sad, so scared. Shit, this is going to hurt.

"Oh damn," I mumbled when I opened my eyes to a blinding vision of light. I was right, the lights hurt my eyes. Still, when my eyes focused to the man holding me, I felt a little better.

"Bella!" Edward cried and pulled me into a tight hug, then pulled me away quickly. "Pinch the bridge of your nose, and tilt your head back to slow the bleeding."

I did as he asked and winced a little as I pinched my nose. It hurt, but at least it wasn't broken.

"Just don't think about the blood," I heard Edward say; I went back to closing my eyes. "I know how bad you are with blood."

"With other people's blood, yeah I still pass out," I explained. "But with my own blood, I have grown more tolerant of it through the years. With how accident prone I am, I was bound to draw some blood over time."

I heard Edward growl, and grunt something about how he didn't like the sound of that.

"Here, let me pick you up," Edward already started to gather my legs. "It was the fact that you wouldn't let me pick you up that started this all in the first place."

He was right. If it wasn't for that stupid stubbed toe, I wouldn't be in this predicament in the first place. But I wouldn't have stubbed my toe if I wasn't so jumpy.

******************************************************************************************************************

Really, this all goes back to a week ago.

"Alice, I'm tired of shopping!" I moaned while I dragged myself along.

She didn't even turn around. "Well if a certain someone, that being you, had not lied about being friends with another certain someone, that being Edward, from a certain someone, me; then the original party would never have to apologize in the first place."

"I don't even know what that means!"

"It means I'm still pissed," Alice whipped her head around. "Tell her Rose."

Rose sighed and turned to me. "You did bring this on yourself by not telling us that you were friends with Edward again."

I bit the inside of my cheek.

Edward and I had wanted to get to know each other again, talk, catch up, and not have to deal with everyone's freaking when they found out. It lasted for about a week until Emmett, of all people, was able to figure it out.

Emmett had made up a joke, told me, and I told Edward. When Emmett told Edward, Edward finished the punch line before Emmett. Somehow Emmett came to the conclusion that the only reasonable explanation of how Edward would have known the punch line, was because I had told him. And when neither of us denied it, we were caught.

Alice made me feel guilty, to say the least, and Rose went along with her. Emmett was too busy doing a victory dance for being able to figure it all out, and Jasper was just relieved that we were one all big happy family again. His words, not mine.

So now I was being punished. We were shopping, and I had to try things on but was not allowed to get anything. I figured I would just go along with it. Alice and Rose had both stuck by my side, and put up with my crap while Edward was gone, so if I was them I would have been pissed too if I hadn't told them the moment things were fixed.

"Alice, please forgive me," I pleaded. "You are an amazing friend, and Edward and I would never have made up if you hadn't pushed us together."

Alice stopped in her tracks and turned back to me. "And?"

"And, I'm sorry."

Alice shook her head. "And?"

"And… you are wonderful."

She nodded as if it was an obvious fact. "And?"

"I should listen to you more often," I smiled.

"Damn right!" Alice nodded with a laugh.

Rose rolled her eyes. "Yeah, we are really easy to get along with."

Alice allowed us a break and navigated us to the Cheesecake Factory in the mall. I told Alice how surprised I was at her punishment, and she confessed that she actually did buy all the clothes and that they would be shipped to my place later this week.

The weather was warmer than normal for early summer, so we asked to sit outside in the patio and let the sun warm and tan our skin. Rose would easily tan and with her wearing a strapless shirt, it would only make it easier. Alice was on the more pale side with me. So even though she was wearing a strapless sundress and I was wearing a thin-strapped light yellow silk shirt, the sun wouldn't affect either of us.

"So spill," Rose prompted. "What happened with you and Edward? The last I heard of, you saw him at a restaurant and threw a few drinks at him."

I laughed at the memory. "Yeah, that was pretty fun."

"Fun for you, but it actually made some press, which I had to cover up." Rose surveyed me over her menu.

"Did it?" That really was a surprise. Who knew that I would actually have caused a little stir? "I'm sorry if it was any trouble for you."

"On the contrary," Rose set down her menu and smiled at me. "It brought your names back into the papers, along with Edward's. It was a _very_ good night for me and Emmett."

"I am happy to have been of assistance to help prompt your sex life."

"So you threw a few waters at him, then…" Alice wiggled her eyebrows at me to continue.

"And I stormed out; he followed me and promised that he would make it up to me." I couldn't help but smile when I thought of Edward's eager face. "I didn't want to put any hope in him again, and then have him disappoint me. So I was beyond surprised when he snuck into my apartment the next day to make me breakfast."

"He didn't?!" Alice squealed with a huge smile on her face.

"How did he get in?" Rose was always the more practical one.

"He did, and he said he forgot to give me back the extra key he had." I shook my head. "The crazy thing is that he actually learned how to cook that meal for me the whole night before!"

Alice and Rose both "awed."

I went on. "I still couldn't talk to him. But he never pushed me; he was really nice about it all. The next couple of days we started to talk a little more. We ran into each other on the day after that really bad storm, and he actually laid down his coat over the puddle for me!"

"That's really sweet and all, but why did he do that?" Rose asked.

I stopped laughing at the memory, and gave Alice a guilty look. "You know those Jimmy Choo's I have?"

Alice's face paled; it wasn't a good look for her. "But nothing happened to those shoes right? Edward did put his coat on the puddle for you."

I nodded. "His coat, then his sweatshirt, then he almost even carried me over a really big puddle."

Alice narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean almost?"

"It was more of a mini lake, than a puddle really."

"Bella…"

"You should have seen it; it must have broken some kind of puddle record."

"Bella!"

"Ok! He dropped me, or rather us." I laughed, and Rose laughed right along with me.

"Wow, strong man you got there," Rose managed to say through her hysterics.

I wanted to correct Rose, and tell her that Edward was not my man; but I liked the sound of it too much to say anything.

"It was slippery!" I defended in the midst of my giggles.

"Yeah, Jimmy Choo's are generally not made to handle your little nature hikes!" Alice growled.

"Come on Alice," Rose grinned. "You have to admit that it was pretty cute."

"I'm sorry, but I do not find the death of Jimmy Choo's cute!" Alice pouted a bit before she shrugged. "But I guess that Edward was pretty sweet."

"He was, but I wasn't sweet in the slightest the next day," I shook my head. "It was just one of those days, and I was a bitch. Edward wanted to make a cake for me," Alice and Rose eyebrows disappeared into their hairlines.

"He bakes now?" Rose half laughed/asked.

"Well, we'll never know because my bitchy-ness came out," I chuckled guiltily. "I picked on him a lot, and I was pretty mean about it too. Soon enough we were arguing about cake, and ended up in a flour fight."

"Like a food fight?" Alice asked.

"But instead with flour," I nodded.

"How did that turn out?" Rose still had a smirk on her face.

I grimaced at the memory. "The clean up was a pain in the ass. Edward thought he could mop it all up, even after I warned him, and he soon realized that water turns flour into glue like crap. But, we made up, and everything is good again."

Alice couldn't hide it anymore; she released the smile she was trying to hide and let out a squeal. "Aw! See, I know you were mad at me when I first put you and Edward in the same restaurant, but now you can see how well that turned out…"

I tuned her out. Yes, Edward and I are friends again, but it wasn't as great as I was hoping it would be. Then again I was hoping that Edward would just kiss me, and for some miracle of a reason, tell me that he was in love with me. It was so much worse now that I am willing to admit that I love him, while trying to maintain my cool and be his "friend".

But he was not helping me any! I was trying to remember if he was as… affectionate, or touchy before, or if I'm just now super aware of it. Did he always put his arms around me so casually? Am I over exaggerating the moments when he strokes my cheek? And when did he start putting his hand on my hips?

Did he do all that stuff before? Or is this new? Am I being a complete girl, and over thinking everything right now?

I didn't want to tell Alice or Rose any of this. One reason being is that I would have to explain that I was in love with Edward, and that is something that I am not willing to get into with them. Rose and Alice have a history of meddling with people's lives. Jasper already knew, which is enough for me; and I would want to tell Edward first… If I were to tell him…

But if I were to tell him, he would guarantee not reciprocate the feelings, and that would, yet again, ruin our friendship when we just got it back. Oh this is too complicated for me. Maybe I should just go on living at only his friend, and live in pain and sorrow for the rest of my life. At least I have a plan.

"Bella!" Rose called out, waking me up from my inner debate.

"Yes," I whipped my head back to my friends.

Rose gave me a look saying that she knew I wasn't paying attention to her, and that she was not too pleased about it. "So yes you will?"

"Yes…" Please don't let this be a trick.

"Good, then you can let Edward know." Rose had a smug smile, as if knowing I was going to have to ask her what I was going to ask Edward.

I bit my lip. "How would you suggest the way that I ask him?"

Alice snickered. She had seen this type of exchanged between Rose and me for years.

This was one of the few times when Rose's plump lips would thin as she stared me down.

"Ask him if he wants to go for karaoke with everyone." Rose had a smug smile on her face as she saw my reaction.

"Why Karaoke again?" I asked stiffly.

"Because Emmett was the one to call you two out on sneaking around, and he called dibs on what to do."

"When you say it like that, it sounds like we were dating," I grumbled. If only Edward and I were sneaking around.

Alice perked up, "If you two were to get together, I expect a phone call with in the hour of the declaration of love. You have hidden enough things from me, I expect you to tell me ASAP."

I frowned. "You sound pretty confident there. That's not ever going to happen."

What _would_ probably end up happening would be me finally giving in and telling Edward how I feel, and me calling Alice in tears because he didn't feel the same way about me.

Just stick to the original plan.

When I got home later that afternoon I wasn't surprised to find Edward there lounging on the couch as if he had never moved out. We agreed it wasn't the best idea for him to move back in, not when we finally have things straightened out. I agreed because I don't think I would be able to restrain myself if I were to find him naked in the shower again.

Yet he was around enough that it was practically like he was living with me again. I had gone over to his apartment, but it smelled funny and the couch wasn't as good as mine; something, which he said, he had missed very much.

"You're home!" Edward called out when I closed the door and walked into the living room.

"Well don't strain yourself," I teased when he barely even nodded to me as a greeting. "I wouldn't want you to pull a muscle by waving to me."

"Oh I'm sorry," Edward grinned to me as he jumped up. "I didn't realize that a grander welcoming was needed."

He scooped me into his arms and picked me up so that I was eye level with him; my feet were at least five inches off the floor. My breathing picked up when he leaned his forehead against my own.

I had to remind myself that these were just friendly gestures and that I shouldn't get too excited. Oh God he smells good.

I laughed and pushed against Edward, halfheartedly trying to get down. I was enjoying this way too much.

"Come on put me down," I gasped with laughter. "You've already proven your manliness that you are strong enough to hold me; I've got to tell you something."

"Well, since you admit my manliness," Edward chuckled when he set me down. "What is this exciting news?"

"It's not so much as exciting as it is, crappy." I walked to my room to set down my purse and change into some more comfortable clothes.

"What's up?" Edward followed me into my room and sat patiently on my bed while I changed in my closet into a comfortable pair of dark peach Capri sweat pants, and a purple tank top.

"The group wants to go out to celebrate our reuniting friendship," I waved my hands around as if to make it more imposing.

"Ok… so what's the catch?" Edward eyed me cautiously, waiting for the punch line.

"They want to go to a karaoke," I wrinkled my nose.

"And what's wrong with that?" he looked at me as if there was something more coming. "It sounds like fun."

I let out an overly dramatic sigh, and plopped myself on my bed right next to him. "Edward, I don't like to sing, and you can't."

He frowned. "Now, I think that is open for debate."

"No Edward, you can't sing." I answered with raised eyebrows. "And every time you sing something bad happens."

"What? Name one time!"

"Ok, last September when you were trying to show me what you can cook, you started singing and the power went out when there wasn't even a storm outside." I looked at him.

"That wasn't my fault," Edward defended.

"No, but we found out that they were doing construction down the street which was the source of the outage-"

He cut me off. "See! Not my fault."

"We were the only apartment in the whole area that was affected."

"That's wasn't too bad…"

"It was the hottest day they ever had in a September since the early 1900's."

Edward stared at me. "But my singing isn't that bad."

"Edward you made the new born from across the hall cry," I laughed.

"That wasn't proven," he pouted.

If I wasn't so in love with the man, I would have kept bugging him. "Alright, go ahead and sing, but only after I had a few drinks."

"Why?"

"Because then my compliments will be a little more sincere when my mind has been hindered by the alcohol." I smiled at him sweetly.

"That's harsh."

The place we were going to was called the Little Red Hen; a smaller bar that does karaoke every Mondays and Wednesdays at 9 pm. The crowd was pretty mixed with people in their 20's and some people who looked like they were in their 70's and still partying.

It was a pretty casual place, so I was able to wear my Guess light blue jeans and a rich blue, V-neck, camisole with spaghetti straps. I like this top because it was long and went down to my hips. I was even able to get away with open toed sandals that had an Athenian look to it.

Alice had also had on jeans, only hers were black. She had on a large, almost baggy but not quite, shirt that had some type of graphic on it. Rose was also pretty casual with simple black pants, white top and a black vest.

I love it when we go out casual.

The boys were all in blue jeans. Emmett decided to wear his "lucky-talent" shirt. It was purple and yellow, and Rose hated it. Alice made Jasper wear a simple white T after seeing Emmett. And Edward and I got a lot of crap because we ended up matching. He had on a blue T-shirt that was the exact same color as my shirt.

The place was already crowded when we showed up around 9:30. One of the best things about this place _was_ the crowd. Everyone who was here wants to have a good time; and in this case alcohol and singing was the formula.

There was already a tipsy man singing Pink's "There You Go" while doing some type of booty dance. People were taking pictures, talking, laughing, and singing along. This was a pretty fun place to come celebrate.

Jasper ordered the first round of drinks and stood up when the waitress brought them to us.

"I would like to say a few words," Jasper cleared his throat.

"Oh no," I laughed.

"About our dear friends Edward and Bella," Jasper nodded towards us. Edward and I were sitting next to each other.

"Let's hear it!" Emmett whooped.

"I think I speak for everyone here when I say that both Bella and Edward have a special place in all of our hearts," Jasper looked around while the others nodded. "And I think I speak for all of us when I say you owe us. After all the tears, all the crap, and all of the stupidity going on between the two of you, you guys owe us big time."

"Here, here!" Alice, Rose, and Emmett all cried out.

"And it's about damn time you guys got back together, so please never put us through anything like that again." Jasper took his glass and raised it for a toast. "To Edward and Bella! A pair of great and idiotic friends who we love just the same!"

I clunked my glass with the others and was barley able to drink it, I was laughing so hard.

I sipped my drink and watched as people made fools of themselves when they sang, yet somehow managed to get everyone one to sing along with them. What I was mainly watching was the interaction of the reunited group. They were my family, and when Edward and I split, the family split. Everything was almost perfect.

Edward relaxed his arm around my shoulders. Now things were _really_ close to being perfect.

"What are you thinking?" he spoke softly so only I would hear. Although the noise in the background was enough to ensure that no one would hear.

I sighed with a content smile and leaned back into his chest. "I'm happy," I answered simply. "I'm thinking how much I missed all of this."

"You missed the drunken sounds of local Seattle folk?" Edward gave me a skeptical look.

I playfully shoved my shoulder into his chest. "You nerd. You know what I mean. I miss everyone being together. It's like a family. I never had a whole family."

I felt Edward's hand tighten on my shoulder. "Sorry," I forced a laugh. "I didn't mean to be a downer."

"No," Edward shook his head. "I understand. When my parents died… I felt like I didn't have anyone. Lauren was nothing, and Jasper and I weren't that close then. But, this is the first time I feel the warmth that only a family gives."

"Wow, we are either sick-messed-up geniuses or masochists," I laughed. "The two people who are in need of that family unit go and mess it up."

"It's all part of my elaborate plan to make you realize just how much you need me in your life," Edward puffed up his chest.

"Ah, I see. But it kind of back fired didn't it? Now you realize how much you need me in your life," I grinned.

"Bella, I knew how much I needed you in my life the moment I saw you all those years back in high school," Edward looked at me seriously. He wasn't joking around anymore. "I didn't act on those needs, and messed up along the way. But now I know," he paused to brush a strand of hair behind my ear. "Oh god, I know now."

We were so close. I have felt his breath on my face before, but this right now, it physically hurt my heart not to lean in and kiss him.

"Edward," I paused not knowing what to say. Not wanting to lose him again.

"Time to sing!" Alice cheered. One drink goes a long way with her. "Who's first?"

"This is Emmett's idea," Rose grinned at her man. "You go first baby."

"Bring it on!" Emmett chugged down the last bit of his beer and slammed it on the table.

Emmett marched up the open stage and requested his song. The familiar guitar and piano intro obtained the room's attention. Emmett held the microphone in his left hand, and had his right hand clenched in a fist. His eyes were shut tight and he had the most serious look on his face.

_**"Just a small town girl… Liven' in a lonely world… She took the midnight train going anywhere!"**_

The crowd cheered and swayed their bodies to the melody of Journey. I had to give it up to Emmett; the boy knew how to put on a show. Whenever there were drums he would wave his hands around as if he were hitting the drums.

When it reached the chorus people were starting to sing along while Emmett worked the crowd. I was too busy in my fit of laughter to sing along when Emmett did his air guitar solo, but even I couldn't resist it when he broke into the best part of the song.

_**"Don't stop, believing!... Hold on to that feeling!... Street lights, people!"**_

Emmett faded from the song and into a round of applause. He shamelessly bowed and blew kisses to the crowd and ran over to our table.

"How are we supposed to follow that?" Edward laughed and patted Emmett on the back.

"I freaking love karaoke!" Emmett beamed at us while he ordered another beer.

We watched people go up and sing some more, but we were all content just talking and watching. Apparently Edward's CD was coming out soon, and the song that he recorded for Andrew Lloyd Webber was going to be the main single. When I asked Edward why he hadn't played it for me, he blushed and told me he would sometime later. Everyone else just laughed.

We were starting to get restless and the stage had been empty for about 15 minuets when Alice demanded Jasper were to sing a song. He wasn't the best singer, but Alice was in love with everything about him, which included his mediocre voice.

Jasper walked onto the stage after putting in his song request. Jasper was the kind of guy that could call a room's attention without even saying a word. He cleared his throat and took the mic.

"So, I'm getting married soon and I have tried my best to make this my fiancé's dream wedding." There was a colleted 'aw' from the woman in the bar. "And my lovely soon-to-be-wife asked me to sing for her, this is for you sweetheart."

The whole crowd started laughing just by the few chords that started to play. After a few "um de bad da" Jasper started to sing.

_**"Pressure! Pushing down on me, pressing down on you, no man ask for… under pressure!"**_

Even Alice couldn't stop laughing while Jasper sang Queen's "Under Pressure". The best part was how Jasper seemed to have gotten into character and had a panic look on his face while shoving his hands above him to stop the pressure from coming down.

The night wore on and I was enjoying my night even more so with each song. Rose later went on to do a very sexy rendition of Billy Idol's "Rebel Yell", earning a standing ovation from Emmett. When Rose was walking back to our table, several men gave her their numbers. She smiled and rejected them nicely and walked straight into Emmett's arms and gave her a big kiss.

I looked away, feeling like I was intruding on a very personal… shit, who am I kidding? I was jealous as hell.

They got to kiss the person that they loved, without fearing they were going to "ruin" anything. God, it's only barely been two weeks, and I'm already starting to break down? I'm pathetic.

"Ok, my turn!" Alice squealed and ran up to the stage without waiting for our encouragement.

If Alice didn't love fashion so much, I would have said she should be some type some type of performer. She wasn't a great singer, I mean the girl could carry a tune and was way better then some of the crap that was out there; but what would really get her sold would be her stage presence.

"Hello! My name is Alice Soon-To-Be-Whitlock, and I'll be performing this song in the name of love!"

She wasn't wasted, but it was obvious that she had a few drinks in her. And I pray to God that she doesn't say anything…

_**"If you change your mind! I'm the first in line. Honey I'm still free, take a chance on me. If you need me let me know! I'm gonna be around. If you got no place to go, if your feeling down!"**_

My jaw dropped. Oh no. Either Jasper told Alice that I was in love with Edward, or I was just that painfully obvious. The way Alice was dancing around up there on stage, with smug little smile while she sang Abba's "Take a Chance On Me", said that it was probably a combination of the both. It didn't, as long as a certain tall, copper, and handsome man doesn't start questioning, and then everything will be alright.

I tried to laugh along with the group at how energetic Alice was, and how many fans she was probably making tonight. But my heart wasn't into it, I was too busy trying to not look like I'm not looking at Edward for any particular reason.

I felt a wave of relief flow through me when her song started to die down and the room clapped for her. I think I handled that very maturely.

"Come on up here Bella!" Alice spoke to me through the microphone.

What a butthead.

I shook my head and tried hopelessly to hide myself. Alice started to call my name over and over to come up and sing. Her fans followed along with her.

I was just about to silently beg Alice to stop when I felt a pair of soft lips accidentally brush up against my ear. My heart stopped.

"Sing," was all he really had to say, but Edward went on. "I'm the one who can't sing, you just don't like to. But I like your voice, its pretty."

"You haven't really heard me sing," I managed to breathe out.

"With your permission, no; but I have heard you sing while you do the dishes and I like it." Edward pulled back so he could look me in the eye. "Please."

Silently, and begrudgingly, I wounded my way up to the now larger looking stage while people clapped. I gave Alice the best dirty look that I could muster, and she had the decency to look apologetic, but she still had a smile.

"I don't even have a song," I muttered.

"Its fine, I picked one out for you," she winked.

"Of course you did," I sighed while I walked to center stage and grabbed the mic. "So I'm not anywhere close enough to being drunk where I think I sound good, but hopefully you all are."

Everyone laughed and I saw a few people raise their drinks as if to toast me. I heard the sound of the intro, and the name of the song on the small screen ahead of me at the same time.

I inwardly groaned and wanted to shake my head, but didn't want to give anything away. Go figure, she just sang an Abba song, and Mamma Mia was her favorite.

I was nowhere close to being a good singer, but like Alice, I could hold a tune. Abba was a little on the high side for me, but I made it work and was even able to smile.

Reading the lyrics now, while I also have a fire within my "soul", made me feel a little more connected with the Swedish band.

_**"Mamma mia, here I go again, my my, how can I resist you?"**_

You said it Abba.

It was one of those fun songs that everyone knows, so not even halfway through the song people started to sing along, making me not feel so at odds singing by my self.

I took an awkward bow and rushed back to my seat without looking like I was out right sprinting. Everyone clapped and gave me high-fives, but all I really wanted to do was go back with Edward's arm around me. How to do that, without looking desperate or in love?

"That was amazing!" Edward wrapped me in a hug when I sat next to him.

Ha! Mission completed.

"Thanks, but I'm still going to kill the short one over there," I jerked my head to Alice.

"But Bella, you were so good!" Alice sipped on another bay breeze.

"You are still dead," I shrugged.

"You can't kill Jasper's almost wife!" Emmett looked at me sternly.

"Thank you Emmett," Jasper patted his friend's shoulder, looking touched.

Emmett patted Jasper's shoulder. "No problem man, I got your back." He turned back to look at me. "Give him at least a month of honeymoon sex with Alice, and then you can kill her."

Alice and Jasper both pretended to be offended, while Rose, Edward and I watched Emmett try to weasel his way out of it. Emmett ended up buying a drink for the two.

Whatever buzz I had was long gone, and I think Edward and Rose were the only ones who were also sober. Emmett, Jasper and Alice on the other hand, had just gone up and performed their rendition of the Village People's "YMCA".

"Edward, you haven't sung yet," Rose looked at Edward. "You should go up."

"Bad things happen when I sing," Edward gave me a sideways glance.

"What's up with that?" Rose laughed.

I laughed along with her. "I'm sorry Edward; I didn't think that you were actually not singing because I said you were dangerous when you sang."

"No, that's not it," Edward sighed dramatically and hung his head down. "You haven't had enough to drink so you can compliment me."

"Aw, I promise I will say that you were good no matter what!" I pushed his arm. "Now go up there and sing something!"

Edward wasn't tipsy anymore, and I can tell that my teasing had gotten to him a little and I felt a little bad. But when Edward got on stage I didn't feel too bad, he was such a ham!

Girls were already swooning just as Edward was requesting his song. He took center stage and had his heartbreaking smile ready for the room.

Here's the thing about Edward; his voice was like velvet and when he speaks it's like you can feel the ripples through your whole body. He is also an extremely talented piano player, meaning he knows about notes and he is clearly not tone deaf. So with those two things combined you would only assume that he would be some kind of singer extraordinaire; not true. My theory is that this is nature's way of balancing out Edward's ridiculous good looks and piano talents, with a crappy singing voice.

"Hello, I'm Edward and I'll be singing Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody." I could hear collected sighs and I wanted to smack each girl who was drooling for him.

_**"Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?"**_

He must know how insainly off key he was! And it was such an Edward like thing to do, to pick a long song. He went on singing and straining for the high notes, only to miss teribly. Whether he knew how off kilter he was or not, Edward kept singing and kept putting everything he had into the song.

I, along with everyone else in our group, was laughing hysterically. Edward was singing every part of the song, even the backup part that were already included with the karaoke CD. The highs, and the lows were not adding up and it was just one big mess.

_**"Any way the wind blows…"**_ Edward ended on a note that was nowhere near where he should have sang, but I still clapped for him. So did the rest of our group and the room.

"See," Edward sat back down next to me, a big smile on his face. "I'm not that bad."

"No Edward," I shook my head and kept laughing. "You are not that bad."

"And nothing bad happened," Edward grinned at me.

"And nothing bad happened," I repeated.

"Hey guys, I think we're going to head out," Alice giggled while Jasper kissed her neck.

"Yeah, go and start the honeymoon early," Jasper wiggled his eyebrows.

"Good idea" Emmett stood up and pulled Rosalie up with him. "Let's go Rosie!"

Rose always had a thing for when Emmett would be on the more _aggressive_ side. "Sorry guys," she laughed. "But I am happy that you guys are friends again."

"I guess that's our que to head out," Edward shrugged to me.

"It's not that late," I pointed out. "Want to come over and watch a movie?"

"Sounds good."

I ignored the glares from the other women as Edward and I walked out of the bar. Really I liked it when they glared at me, it helped me imagine what it would feel like to be with Edward. In my world, he would be holding me close to him, hiding us from the rain that had just started up outside, he would also hold my hand while we were in the taxi instead of the respectable space between us. And in my world he would wrap his arm around me while he guided me to the apartment.

I was too lost in my own world that I caught myself inching myself closer to Edward in the taxi cab. Edward was looking out the window admiring the steady rain, and when he turned around to say something, he and I were both surprised at how close I was to him. We jumped away from each other, just as the taxi cab driver slammed on the breaks.

"We're here," the driver grunted without even turning around.

Edward paid him before I even touched my purse.

"Thanks," I whispered.

Edward climbed out ahead of me, and had his jacket over his head with one hand, and his other hand extended for me to take. I placed my foot on the edge of the car, and reached out to take his hand, yet right before I touched him I thought of the imgages I was playing in my head on the ride here, of us being together and me not having to hide it from him.

On the last second I decided not to take his hand, and ended up falling out of the cab, and stubing my toe on the concrete curb.

"Ow!" I yelled. Edward managed to catch me, but not before accidently groping me.

"I'm sorry," Edward pushed me back and shoved his hands into his pockets, his face bright red.

I'm sure I would be blushing too if I wasn't trying to cradle my foot while the rain drops pelted me.

"I'm sorry!" Edward repeated, a little more frantic this time directing it toward my swelling toe.

"It's alright, let's just get in." I wobbled, and hopped my way to the lobby not giving Edward a chance to offer to carry me in. "Aw, shit."

The elevator had a temporarily closed sign on it. This had only happened to me one other time since I've lived here, and after that weekend I promised myself that I would never live on the top floor of an apartment building ever again. Particularly not an apartment building that had 12 floors.

"Looks like we're going to have to take the stairs," Edward frowned. "Bella, let me carry you up."

"Edward, I am not going to let you carry me up 12 stories." Plus my body was so aware of Edward at the moment, that I don't think that letting him hold me would be a good idea. Surpising him with a kiss, while he was carrying me on a flight of stairs could be a danger hazard.

"I'm fine," I hobbled my way to the stair case.

I thought I heard Edward mumble something about being stubborn. He was patient while I took one stair at a time.

It hurt like hell, but I keep reminding myself that my will was slowing breaking in regards to Edward. So I trecked on.

We were both quiet, I was busy concentrating on not falling, and Edward was probably also making sure that I wasn't going to fall. Somewhere halfway up the 7th floor, Edward started talking about the different people who sang at the bar.

"There were some really good people," he rambled on. "But there were some really bad people too."

I had to fight back a snort.

"And I think I was pretty good, I mean a lot of people cheered for me." I could hear Edward's smile while he spoke. "And nothing went wrong at all, besides the elevator being down, and you stubbing your toe…"

That was when I felt my foot fallout from under me, and I started to go head first to the top step.

Which is how I got to where I am now; Edward running up the steps with me in his arms. I could tell that the bleeding had already stopped and nothing was broken, but Edward was still in a slight panic mode.

Edward was panicing, I had blood all over me, and yet all I can really think about is how tight he was holding me and how close I was to him. And I wasn't only thinking about these thing because I had just hit my head, but because that man who I love and want to spend the rest of my life with, is holding me and this is the only time I can really enjoy it.

Edward was unlocking the door when I finally broke down into tears. It was all so unfair. I can't just tell him that I love him, because then everything we had just fought for would have been for nothing. Even if I could tell him, would I be willing to go through that heartbreak of him telling me that he doesn't love me?

It was so unfair!

"It's ok Bella, we're here now," Edward tried to sooth me. "I'll go get some ice."

"I'm not crying because my nose hurts," I sobbed even harder. But it did sill hurt.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot about your toe," Edward stood up. "I'll be right back."

He didn't get it. But why should he? I haven't told him. So it should be a good thing that he doesn't get it. I cried more.

"Here," Edward gently placed an ice pack on my toe and on the birdge of my nose where I held it in place. "I also grabbed some wet paper towles to get the blood off your face."

I closed my eyes and tried to concintrate on the cold pressure on my toe and nose, and not on the pressure on my heart.

"You look alright," Edward whispired. "Your nose isn't even swelling, and without all the blood you don't look as dead."

"What happened?" I asked with my eyes still clenched tight.

Edward chuckled. "You fell _up_ the stairs."

I opened my eyes, and gave him a questioning look.

"Your foot slipped from under you," he explained. "I was so ready for you to fall backwards and down, that I didn't even think that you would go face first to the step ahead of you. You were lucky though, that you didn't fall on the edge of the step; that would have been bad."

I closed my eyes again. I felt him carress my face over and over; each time gently, each time torture.

I broke down crying again, one of my ugly-out-of-breath crying that my friends sometimes found comedic.

"What's wrong?" Edward pulled his hand away, which made me cry more. "Do we need to take you to the ER?"

"I can't!" I choked through my sobs.

"Ok, we don't have to go," Edward tried to soothe me back down.

"No, no, no!" I shook my head with each 'no'. "You don't get it Edward; I can't be friends with you."

"What?" his voice sounded panicked, and his face paled. "Bella, you can't mean this, we just made up!"

I sat up and put the ice pack on my nose down, and looked at him with burly eyes. "I can't be your friend, because I would mess up somewhere down the line and you wouldn't want to be my friend."

"Bella, what are you saying?" he looked genuinly confused and hurt.

"I'm saying that I already am hurting this friendship, and I'm just so tired and done," I started to hicup, something I do when I have one of my hard cries.

"Bella, we're fine, we are friends and always will be," he kneeled down in front of me so he could reach out and rubbed my shoulders.

"No," I pushed him away. "I don't want to be your friend."

Edward held on tighter to me. "Why?"

"Because I love you," I hicupped.

He didn't move his hands away, and didn't saying anything for some time. We sat there in silence; me on the couch with my head hanging down with the ocasional hicup, Edward kneeling on the floor in between my legs and his hands still on my shoulders.

"When you say you love me, you mean…" Edward trailed off for me to finish.

I laughed driely. "It means that you are the one person in the world that I want to give myself to completely: physically, emotionally, spiritualy. It means Edward, that without your knowing; you have my heart and soul all within your grasp. I love everything you do, and everything you are. Whether that means that sometimes you're stubborn or thickheaded, or a famous pianist, or a crappy singer, I love you completely and entirely.

Wow, I feel a lot better saying that outloud to you," I sighed mainly to myself.

I was expecting him to tell me that it could never happen, that I had destroyed everything, and that he couldn't love me. What I didn't expect was for him to pull me down on the ground so that we were both on our knees facing each other. From there he pulled me into his chest held on to me.

"Bella," he whispired into my ear before pulling away so that he could look into my eyes. I focused on his dark emerald orbs that he called eyes, while he spoke. "I love you too."

"When you say you love me, you mean…" I trailed off.

"I mean that you are the woman I want to make a family and a future with. You are the woman who I want to spend everyday getting to know better even though I know you completely already. You are the woman who has my heart and soul in the palm of your hand, and I've never felt safer. I love how you trust me, and need me just like I do you. You are my best friend, you are my heart, and you are my everything. I have loved you for a very long time."

We didn't move. I couldn't move, I was trying to figure out if this was reality or not. There was no way that he was in love with me. He would have said something a long time ago surely. This had to be a joke, this couldn't be real. But those eyes that looked down on me with such intensity, those eyes which I know so well that I could tell if he was hurt or happy just by the look into them, were now telling me that he was saying the truth; and the truth was that he somehow loved me too.

"How long?" I asked quietly.

Edward laughed to himself and shook his head. "I realized it right when you left on your very first date with Jacob actually."

"You knew since way back then?" I frowned.

"Bella…" Edward panicked. "Please don't be mad."

"Edward, I'm not mad, I don't know if I even have a right to be, but I'm just tired of having to hide how I feel, and I just really, really want to kiss you."

Edward laughed and leaned down. His lips were perfect. They matched mine, and were soft yet urgent. It was a sweet kiss at first, but after a long night of being careful of how I touched him, I didn't stop Edward when I felt his tongue ask for permission. It was like a dance that only we knew, a dance that had my head spinning when we pulled apart for air and rested our forheads on one another.

I started to cry again.

"What's wrong?" Edward loosened his grip on me and I pulled on his shirt closer to me.

"This is the most non-romantic set up for a confession of love ever," I laughed. "Look at me, my shirt is all bloody."

Edward laughed loudly, and I couldn't help but laugh with him. "Bella, anything we do together is perfect. So even if that means us telling each other that we love one another while your shirt is stained with blood, along with some of my shirt, and you can't quite walk yet because of your stubbed toe; it still is perfect because we are together and we don't have to hide anything anymore."

I breathed in the feeling of him saying he love me. "But it hurts my nose when I kiss you," I half hiccupped, half laughed.

"Now that is something to cry about," he lent down and kiss me lightly; making sure not to touch my nose. "But now I kiss you whenever I want, for as long as I want, for the rest of my life… right?"

He looked at me with uncertain eyes, and I smiled at him. "Only if I can kiss you whenever I want."

"Deal."

I nodded and held on to Edward freely and without hesitation because for some kind of miracle he was in love with me. We whispired our love for each other back and forth for sometimes, sharing kisses and laughter.

Finally, when Edward decided it was time for me to get cleaned up, he stood up and took me in his arms again; I didn't even protest the fact that he was carrying me.

He started to laugh when he set me down on the counter of my bathroom.

"What's so funny," I asked with a smile.

"And you said only bad things happened when I sang."

* * *

**They are together! I have been waiting, along with many of you, since last August, and now they are finally together. I'm sorry if some are not happy with how things worked out, or if it was too easy. But when a dream is coming true, you don't say 'stop'. I think we have all been through enough drama, haha. The next two chapters will be of them together, almost like a two chapter epilogue. The next chapter is called: _Going to the Chapel._**

**Remember: **

***that you can fallow me on Twitter, my SN is tbjac89**

***I only have written Continuing On, on Fanfiction, and if you see me on Wattpad, that is NOT me.**

***Check out the awards I have been nominated for, Twilight Twin Award, and Twilight Choice Awards**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	29. Going to the Chapel

**Thank you to everyone for your reviews and reading, and everything.**

**Thank you to my awesome Beta, who has been putting up with me Belle. Thank you**

**And I do not own Twilight**

* * *

Chapter 29- Going to the Chapel

Bella POV:

_"Smooth talkn', so rockn'. He's got everything that's a girl's wantin'." _I poked Edward in the cheek; he shook his head and silently laughed. I kept singing along, and changed the first word. _"Piano cutie, he play's it groovy!"_ Edward rolled his eyes. _"And I can't keep myself from doing something stupid."_

"This song is stupid," I heard him mutter to himself.

_"I think I'm really falling for his smile,"_ I reached over and cupped Edward's chin, and with my fingers squished up his lips to form a forced smile. _"Get butterflies when he says my name!"_ I released his chin and leaned back into my seat so I could wave my arms around properly for the chorus.

_"He's got something special, He's got something special, And when he's looking at me I wanna get it all sentimental. He's got something special, He's got something special, I can hardly breathe. Something's telling me telling me maybe he could be the one!"_

Edward leaned forward to turn down the volume, completely interrupting my groove.

"Hey!" I protested, dropping my arms from rocking out.

"I accepted the fact that you liked a few Jonas Brother's songs, but now Miley Cyrus?" Edward kept shaking his head.

I felt my bottom lip stick out, "Actually, this is Hannah Montana."

He barked out a laugh. "Ok that's it; I don't think we can keep seeing each other if you are going to be listening to this underage music."

I leaned back into my seat and tried to hide my grin. "That's cool; I always thought your man crush with Justin Timberlake was a little iffy."

"He is a very talented musician!" Edward protested.

I bit my lip trying not to laugh. "But I've got to say, you have horrible timing in breaking up with me. We're almost at Forks, and I don't think that the police chief there will be too happy that you broke up with his daughter."

Edward lost the color in his face. "Ugh, why are we staying at your dad's again?"

I sighed; we've had this conversation three times before we even left, and one time already on the road. "Because we are here for the wedding, and will be here for only a couple of days, and how can I not stay with my dad? If we were here for more than three days, I'd say we should get a hotel. Come on, my dad loved you last Christmas!"

Edward took a few deep breaths then finally glanced at me with a playful smile. "You're lucky Swan, I'm not going to break up with you for the Hannah Montana song, but if I hear even a few chords of some High School Musical crap…"

I pushed myself from my seat so I could lean over and give Edward a kiss on the cheek. "Awe, look at you, threatening me as if you have a say in things."

Edward broke out laughing.

"You love me too much, you'll take me with Disney music and all," I kissed his cheek again.

"Yeah, crappy music and all," he mumbled.

"Just like how I'll take you with your creepy man crush and all," I teased.

"The man has talent!"

I relaxed back into my seat and looked out the window with a silly grin on my face.

Dating Edward was… amazing, right, perfect, and natural. I had to admit, that during the first couple of days together, I wasn't sure how the transition from best friends to being boyfriend- girlfriend was going to work out. I knew that I was completely in love with him, but the idea that Edward is in love with me too was something I couldn't wrap my head around.

Looking back to when we first admitted we loved each other, it feels like I'm looking back to a dream that was not real. I remember telling Alice, only because I had told Edward what Alice demanded that I do, and he insisted that I called her otherwise she would have raised hell. I settled on a text saying something along the lines of "don't know how you called it, but Edward and I are together now. If you call me, I won't tell you how it happened."

I didn't want anyone interfering, I wanted to figure thing out with Edward; just the two of us. I was shocked when Edward told me that he had realized he loved me since my first date with Jacob, and all of the things he went through while I was dating him. I told Edward that the reason why I had wanted things to work between me and Jacob was because I had a crush on Edward and I didn't know what to do.

Edward started smiling and said he want to call up Jacob and tell him what I had just said.

I was shock when I realized Edward did the whole, me seeing him naked in the shower thing on purpose. And I couldn't stop laughing when he told me about the rivalry he and Jacob had, especially when we all went to the family fun center. But when I found out why Edward was always so angry in the end, and why he really left, made me angry with myself for not seeing it sooner.

Edward wouldn't let me beat myself up over it though. He said that the only thing that mattered was that we were together now, and that it was almost a good thing that we had spent that time apart. I remember thinking that Edward was crazy, and telling him so; but he explained to me that we both grew while apart, and yet even though we were both angry at the other party, and even though we didn't see each other for almost three months, we still loved one another even while thinking that it was unrequited. He reasoned that if we could make it through that, then we could handle anything in the future.

I remembered that I kissed him.

There were a couple of things we needed to talk about with the new territory of dating each other. One was if he should move back in. We agreed no, at least not right away. We may have lived together harmoniously enough when we were only friends, but living together while dating was probably going to be a little different.

Yet as time wore on it was clear that he was probably going to move in when the lease was up in September; he stayed at my place basically every day and only went back to his apartment to get whatever clothes he hadn't already brought over.

Another big issue was the sex. Edward was cautious about kissing me for the first few days; my stupid nose was still sore. Trust me, the moment I stopped flinching whenever I tested to see if my nose still hurt, I jumped him. And after almost getting carried away, we agreed that we should wait for a little while before we took it to the next step.

Yeah, that didn't even last a week.

We were on a walk when, surprise, it started raining. By the time we made it back to my apartment we were both soaked. And what had started out as playful kissing turned into a night of discovering one another, loving one another, and pleasing one another. For someone who had claimed being inexperienced, he had many tricks up his sleeve. And need I say? My man is packing!

The next morning he had this smug ass smile on his face, and would randomly start laughing to himself. It took a while to get it out of him, but finally he told me.

"Well, you dated Jacob for how many months and you guys never had sex? You and I got together five days ago…" he chuckled to himself.

If he wasn't standing there in only his boxers and looking mighty damn good, I might have been a little more pissed. Instead I smacked his arm, "You know I don't believe in sex without love!"

Edward pulled me to him and wrapped his arms around. "I know," he kissed my forehead. "But it's a guy thing."

I tried to wiggle away from him. "I don't know why you're being so smug about this, you know you win if I had to choose between you and anyone."

"I know," he laughed playfully as he picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder while I let out a scream. "And let's go verify that you choose me, shall we?"

When Edward and I finally emerged from the apartment to go hang out with our friends for the first time after we got together, everyone said a collected "about damn time." Alice had reminded me how good she had been by not calling me, and demanded to know every little detail. And I mean _every_ detail. The next day she had teased Edward about the small birthmark the shape of a strawberry on his upper thigh.

Hanging out with everyone was exactly the same as before, only now I felt like I could breathe easier. I guess I never realized how envious I was of my friends and their relationships. I could now kiss Edward whenever I felt like, and sometimes I kissed him just because I could. He particularly liked it when I did that.

Alice was thrilled that we were together just in time for her wedding. I had rolled my eyes at Alice then, but when her wedding finally did come around, I was more then pleased to know I had a date. And Edward was the perfect date.

Alice and her very tired wedding planner had planned a perfect wedding. Everything was perfect, the flowers, the colors, and the subtle decorations. Rose and I looked sexy yet classy in our bridesmaid dresses. Alice had declared herself amazing after seeing her sister step out of the dressing room, and looked ten pounds lighter than what she really was, all because of the cut of her dress.

As for Alice's wedding dress, well I have to say she never looked more beautiful; but I think that was because she was looking at Jasper with only love in her eyes.

It seemed to be the summer for weddings. Right after Alice's wedding, Angela called to tell me that her and Ben were getting married at the end of August. She planned to do a small, ceremony in her parent's backyard (if it wasn't raining).

So Edward and I were on our way to Forks for the wedding, and Edward was having a mild… nope, full blown panic attack about staying in Charlie's house. Being the faithful girlfriend that I am, I enjoyed watching him freak out.

Edward gripped the steering wheel. "You're enjoying this."

"Yes I am," I nodded with a smile. "I never brought a guy home before, so this is all very entertaining."

"Yeah well, let's see how entertaining it is when your dad kills me and your left to go alone to the wedding."

I bit my lip. "You got a point there; make sure you don't piss off Charlie then."

"What do you mean piss him off?" Edward glanced at me with a panicked look. "Is that easy to do?"

"Never mind that, we're already here."

Edward pulled the car into the driveway. Unlike the last time we came to visit Charlie wasn't outside waiting for us, so Edward was able to take a few moments to regain his composure.

"You're acting ridiculous you know that right?" I raised an eyebrow.

Edward pulled me closer to him so I could hear his whisper while we walked to the front door. "Look, you told me you never brought a guy home before right? Meaning I'm the first. Meaning he never had a chance to do that whole protective father thing. Meaning, I could be a dead man."

I started at him, my jaw hanging slightly. "Oh my God, I'm in love with a freak."

"Bella!"

I rang the doorbell. "I'm sorry Hun, but I think you're just over reacting."

Charlie opened the door, a rifle in his hand.

"Maybe you're not," I breathed so only Edward could hear. It looked like Edward was right with Charlie doing the protective dad thing; in that case I was going to have to bring out the big guns.

"Daddy!" I squealed and threw myself into Charlie's arms. I hardly ever called Charlie 'Daddy'. In fact I had only used it three times before. Once when I accidentally broke his downstairs TV, another time when I told him I wasn't moving back to Forks but instead moving to Seattle, and another time when I installed wireless in the house before telling him.

"How's my baby girl doing?" Charlie hugged me right back. A, Charlie has _never_ called me that, and B, he was not a hugging kind of a person. He was laying it on thick for Edward.

I kept my hands on his arm, but pulled away slightly. "I'm good, not much going on. You excited about the wedding?"

Angela and Ben have known Charlie for years, so it was only natural that he was invited as well.

I tried to steer Charlie into the house so that Edward could get inside, and out of the rain. But Charlie wasn't having any of that and kept me in place so that I was out of the rain and Edward was getting soaked.

"It's about time those two kids got married," he nodded.

When it was clear that Charlie wasn't going to be making any point to move I clear my throat. "Um…Dad, I think we should get inside, Edward's going to get soaked to the bone if he keeps standing out there."

Charlie shrugged as if to say 'so what' but released me anyway and made room for us to come inside.

"Dad you remember Edward right?" it was a lame question to ask, but the man wasn't giving me much to work with.

"How you doing Sir?" Edward stuck his hand out, flicking some water at Charlie.

Charlie just looked at Edward's hand. "Go into the bathroom and wash up, you're getting water everywhere."

I felt bad for Edward as he ran up the steps, a distinct "squish" on every step he took.

I followed Charlie to the living room, where he set down his rifle next to his gun cleaning kit. "Dad."

"What's up?" he asked, but kept his eyes on the gun.

"Dad," I repeated and went to go sit next to him so that he could pay attention to me. "I want you to be good, and nice to Edward."

"I am," he huffed.

"Dad!"

"Fine," he looked up at me. "Come one Bells, he is the first guy ever brought home; I've got to give him a hard time."

It looks like Edward's theory was right. "He'll be the last guy I bring home," I said quietly.

Charlie raised both eyebrows. "That serious?"

"Yeah, that serious."

"Hmm," Charlie relaxed into the couch. "Well, I'll make sure to make the couch is extra comfortable for him."

"Dad…" I blushed, but kept a stern look on my face. "He's not sleeping on the couch."

Charlie frowned.

I kept talking. "You know how much I respect you, and by how freaked out Edward was, you know he respects you. I'm almost 29, an adult, in a relationship with the man who will be your son in law one day. Please be reasonable."

Charlie ran his hands through his hair and let out a breath he seemed to have been holding. "Future son in law, huh? Is that official?"

"Not yet," I shook my head with a smile. "We don't want to rush anything, but we've already talked about it and we know that's where it's going."

Charlie took another breath and slowly let it out. "Alright, I'll be good. That whole 'if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything.'"

I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks dad."

Three loud thumps brought Charlie and I out of our father/daughter moment. I jumped up and rushed to the stairs to find Edward steadying himself.

"I forgot that the stairs are wet from my clothes," Edward looked up to see Charlie walking in from the living room.

"I'm sorry, I'll clean this up as soon as I can," Edward leaped to the next step, not seeing the small puddle.

After years of always being the clumsy one, of always falling for no good reason, it was finally my turn to laugh at someone else being clumsy. And the fact that it was Edward, whose legs went flying up from underneath him and sent him flat on his butt and slid down to the bottom step, just made it the icing on the cake.

I laughed. I laughed my ass off.

Charlie shook his head as he left and mumbled, "Aw hell, don't say anything… I got nothing nice to say."

After calming Edward down from his 'Bella moment', I was able to help him clean the stairs up. I quickly got dinner whipped up and dinner itself wasn't too awkward once we all had something to talk about.

Charlie went to bed early, giving Edward a glare that brought him back to panic mode.

"Why did your dad look at me that way?" Edward asked me, wide eyed. "I thought things were good."

"I don't know what goes on in that man's mind," I shrugged.

Edward sighed, and finished drying the last plate I handed him after washing it. "Well I guess we better go to bed, tomorrow's the rehearsal and after Alice's rehearsal, I don't underestimate how draining it can be."

I grimaced at the memory. Her sister was being a pain and kept messing up or asking dumb questions. In retaliation, Alice had us rehearse over and over and over and over…

"I doubt Angela would be like Alice, but I don't want to risk it." I grabbed Edward's hand, "Let's go."

"Go where? I'm sleeping on the couch," he asked but still followed me.

"Oh right, about that. I kind of told my dad that you were going to sleep with me." I tried to keep walking up the stairs, but Edward held tight to my hand.

"What?!"

"I just explained to him that we're adults, and you are the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, and… oh, Edward please don't look at me like that."

"He's going to kill me." He shook his head, and slumped to the wall. "He's going to sneak into your room and kill me because you can't keep it in your pants."

I was on a step higher than he was which made us almost eye level. (He was still taller.) I wrapped my arms around his neck and placed soft kisses all over his face.

"We don't have to do anything, but I just wanted to be able fall asleep, and wake up in your arms knowing that I'm safe, and loved. But if you don't want that…" I pouted.

"Fine, you win," Edward shook his head and kissed me. "You know I can't say no to your pout. But don't you try to get frisky with me."

I raised my right hand. "Scout's honor that I'll keep my hand to myself."

Edward raised an eyebrow. "You were never a girl scout."

"No," I shrugged. "But I ate their cookies."

The next day Angela text messaged me asking that Edward and I get over there ASAP. Angela was never the dramatic type, so getting a text like that from her was definitely something to take seriously.

Edward and I were at her house in less then ten minuets and we were met with chaos. There were kids running around screaming, some half clothed, the decorations looked as if someone had tossed them around, hoping that it would stick but not really caring either way. An argument could be heard from both the direction of the kitchen and up stairs. And faintly, I heard the distinct sounds of my best friend crying.

Not caring about any of the other sounds in the house, I ran straight to where I knew she would be; out in her patio. Sure enough, the back screen door was open and I was able to find Angela sitting in the loveseat swing, her head hanging down and her hands covering her face. I had probably only found Angela crying, maybe four or five times since our becoming friends, but each time she would come out to this porch swing to cry. And each time, like I am now, I would sit next to her, wrap my arms around her and ask what's wrong.

"Everything's wrong!" she sobbed.

It was such a girl like comment, which made me want to laugh at the fact that I was coming from cool, calm, collected Angela.

"Ok… how about we start off with what's most wrong?" I spoke softly and rubbed her shoulders. From the corner of my eye I saw Edward hanging out by the door, staying in case I needed him.

"I wanted to do a small backyard wedding so that I wouldn't have to put up with the stress of a big wedding, but now everything is falling apart!" Angela let out an angry breath before going on. "It all started when Ben's cousin decided last minute that she wanted to come to the wedding too. You know how much I love Ben's family Bella," she looked up at me with pleading eyes.

"Angela, I know how much you love people. Remember you're the Jane Bennett." Angela and I always were obsessed with Jane Austen books, particularly Pride and Prejudice. I always referred Angela to the eldest sister, Jane; who was the kind sister that only looked at the good in people. Not including Edward, I don't think she has ever really disliked a person; and she ended up forgiving Edward!

Angela laughed a little, which gave me hope that her day wasn't going to be in a complete ruin. "I don't care that she decided to come last minute, it's just that she's been criticizing everything that I'm doing and she said that she can do better, so when I let her do something; like the decorations, she ends up doing a horrible job and leaves it without even trying to fix it!"

So that explained the decorations. "And what about the kids running around?" I asked softly.

"They got out?" Angela looked at me with wide teary eyes. "_She_ was supposed to be watching them until their outfits for the wedding came so they can try them on. All I told her to do was keep them locked up in a bedroom!"

"And the arguments?"

"In the kitchen my mom's arguing with my Grandma that they need to special order a cake. And my grandma is demanding that she makes our wedding cake, but she doesn't understand that Ben's allergic to eggs, and I'm scared my grandma is going to kill Ben. And upstairs they are trying to make Ben's cousin a last minute bridesmaid dress."

"What do you mean last minute bridesmaid dress? I thought there was only going to be me, and Britney." Britney was Ben's sister. She and Angela had gotten pretty close and when Britney got married Angela was her maid of honor. So it worked out for Britney to be Angela's maid of honor. No wonder Angela was breaking down here.

"Yeah," Angela looked up at me, this time real anger shone through her eyes. "She's demanding that she's in the wedding, and now it throws everything off because Ben doesn't really have guy friends that he can ask to drive down to a wedding that they originally weren't invited to, so that they can be a groomsmen!"

"Why can't you have one of the guys here do it?" I offered. "You must have plenty of male family members here."

"Yeah, but if we ask any of them, there is going to be more drama on why we didn't ask the other guys." Angela shook her head. "I just wanted to marry Ben."

I kept rubbing her shoulder while I took everything in that she just told me. "Alright, here's the game plan. We're going to let your grandma cook her cake, but tell her that it has to be small and if she doesn't like that then she doesn't have to cook anything. Then you can make that the kids' cake or something, while you can eat the egg free cake that is going to be specially made.

Edward can go lasso up the kids and go entertain them for a bit; there is a SpongeBob marathon going on right now that the kids can watch." Both Angela and Edward gave me an odd look. I shrugged. "What? That little square pants sponge is funny."

I thought I heard Edward mumble something like, 'at least it's not Disney.'

I kept going. "I'll go see what I can do with the dress. I know that Alice and the gang are going to be here in like an hour and I'm sure Alice would love to help out with putting the dress together. And once they all get here, they can help put all the decorations together."

Angela stared at me open mouthed for a bit before tackling me with a hug. "Bella, thank you, thank you!"

I hugged her back. "Don't thank me yet, we still have to get everything done."

I called up Alice and asked her if she could help out, before I could even finish my sentence she said yes. Everyone agreed to help out, and Edward had just left the room of kids saying that they'll be taking a nap in about an hour or so.

I went up stairs to see is if I can help Ben's bitch of a cousin. There were two of Angela's aunts with soft green colored fabrics hanging around themselves. They greeted me with open arms and hugs (they didn't live in Forks, but they had visited a lot back in high school) while I asked where the wedding crasher was.

"She's in the bathroom," Aunt Linda nodded her head in the direction.

"Little brat is causing up a storm," Aunt Anna sighed as she took a seat on the bed.

"Well help is on the way, so you guys can probably go take a break." I smiled at how wonderful my friends were.

"We won't leave you alone with her dear," Aunt Linda walked over to pat my shoulders. "That wouldn't be humane."

From all of the talk over this mysterious, bitchy cousin, I was half expecting her to have a body of a grizzly bear, a head of a crocodile, and a personality of a tornado. Oh, I am feeling creative today.

There was a knock at the door as Edward peeked his head in. "Safe to come in?"

"The beast is at bay," I nodded with a smile while Edward B lined to give me a kiss. The Aunts whistled.

"Aunt Linda, Aunt Anna, I am shocked by the both of you," I feigned my bewilderment.

Edward released me so he could walk over to the Aunts. "Hello, my name is Edward Masen." He held out his hand.

"My name is Anna, and this is my sister Linda," Anna shook his hand.

"And my name is Tanya," a light voice called out.

Well, she sure as hell didn't have a body of a grizzly, or a head of a crocodile. She was taller than me but shorter than Edward, and her legs seemed to go out a mile long in her casual workout shorts. She was slim and fit and those boobs were totally fake! At least I'm hoping that they are. And of course she's pretty, with that doe eyed look. To top it call off was that strawberry blond hair that curled just perfectly at the ends.

I didn't like her.

Tanya sauntered over to Edward as if he was her prey and held out her dainty hand with a flirtatious smile.

Edward looked over at me with an alarmed expression. Ha! My smart boyfriend wasn't going to be falling for your tricks! Still, Edward being his polite self took her hand and curtly shook it with a brief, "Nice to meet you."

He was just about to be free of her clutches before she reached out for his arm and pulled him back.

"So you're here for the wedding?" she asked while I had to hold back a 'no shit Sherlock.'

"Err yes, I'm here with my girlfriend," Edward looked at me with pleading eyes. "Bella."

To the rescue! I was used to seeing Edward being hit on by other girls, and I didn't mind, because then I could come in and just say that _I_ was his girlfriend and that they needed to back off. But this Tanya chick, I did not like at all.

So I did what girls do best. I put on my friendliest smile and wrapped my arms around Edward.

"Hi I'm Bella, Edward's girlfriend, and one of the original members of the bridal party." Pulling out the bitch gloves.

"Hi Bella," Tanya smile just as brightly. "It's nice to meet you. I'm also part of the wedding party. It was such a surprise, but when I found out that I could make it to the wedding Angela and Ben demanded that I'd be in the wedding."

It physically hurt not to roll my eyes.

"So I'm thrilled to be here, but I must say Angela is really brave for sticking to her wedding color, green; seeing as _some_ people just might not be able to pull it off." Tanya smiled sweetly to me.

"Well, I've been here since the beginning with her and Ben, she already made sure that both Britney and I look amazing. So, the only one who really needs to worry is you." My smile kept on shining. "But I'm sure you'll look great."

"Hmm, yes," Tanya's smile faded a bit.

I felt my cell buzz.

I looked up to Edward. "Cool, everyone's here. We should go meet up with them." I smiled over to other woman in the room. "I'll be right back with more reinforcement."

The moment the door closed behind Edward started kissing my neck. "What's this for?" I giggled.

"You have no idea how hot you are when you get all catty," Edward kept nuzzling my neck.

"Well, if we're going to be spending today and tomorrow together then she better know not to hit on my man." I always love saying that he's my man.

"Bella!" Rose called out as I stepped on the last step. "What the hell happened here?" Behind a surprised Rose, were our equally shocked friends.

Summing up what was going on was quick and easy enough, and when I told them what the game plan was they were all up for the challenge. Before we were about to split up I looked to Alice and Rose.

"So Tanya, the cousin, well make sure you two keep an eye on how close she gets to Jasper and Emmett."

"Hey!" both Jasper and Emmett looked at me, offended.

"It's nothing on you guys, but we've got ourselves a stage five clinger."

Emmett's offended frown broke into a smile. "Nice Wedding Crashers reference."

"I thought it was appropriate," I grinned. "But seriously, I've got a bad feeling about this girl."

"Thanks for the heads up Bella," Alice nodded to me.

It was a long day, but with my friends there it made time go by easier. About two hours into the work, Alice came storming down stairs. I had never seen her this pissed off, and just kept huffing about how much of a bitch Tanya was. Apparently Tanya kept telling Alice what to do, and how she was doing everything wrong, and trying to teach Alice how to properly thread a needle.

Jasper had to calm Alice down, but finally Alice just smiled at us and said how she had put together the dress in such a way, that it would make Tanya look like she was pregnant. I don't know how Alice would be able to manage that with how skinny Tanya is, but Alice told us to trust her, so we did.

Alice, Jasper, Rose, and Emmett all decided to stay at a hotel, which turned out best because I have no idea how we would be able to fit everyone in Charlie's little house.

I was lying in bed reading one of the books that I always keep at Charlie's house, when Edward walked in after just having taken a shower. His towel hung dangerously low, and since I knew what he was working with, it wasn't hard to imagine.

Edward sat on the bed, facing away from me, and used his other towel to dry off his messy hair. I set the book aside, not caring about the page I was on, and crawled across the bed to wrap my arms around Edward's bare chest from behind. He didn't say anything, but I felt him relax in my arms as I started to kiss his shoulder, his neck, and his ear.

Slowly I worked my way around to kiss him properly, but I had to crawl into his lap to get the better angle. From underneath the towel, I could feel him getting just as into it as I was, so I pushed him onto the bed so I could straddle his chest.

I went back to kissing his neck and working my way down his chest. Edward had this half grunt, half moan thing that drives me crazy (in a good way) when I hear it. And as I kissed down his stomach I was hearing his moan just as I liked it. I stayed kissing his stomach while my hands reached up to take off his towel.

"No," Edward's hand came up and grabbed mine. "No," he repeated again, just as breathless as the first time.

"What?" my breathing wasn't any better.

"I mean, no. We shouldn't do this." Edward sat up a bit and took my hand off his towel.

"Are you not into it?" I asked, lost in my confusion. "Because I thought you and I were on the same page here." I slid down further on him and sat directly on him. It was just my underwear and his towel in the way. I rubbed up against him. "Nope, you're more than ready."

"Bella!" Edward hissed and threw his head back. Before I could get that reaction again, he rolled out from under me. I lost balance and ended up lying next to him on the bed.

"Edward, what's wrong?" I reached over cupped his face. Maybe I was getting spoiled, but so far whenever I'm in the mood he is _very_ willing to fulfill my needs, and vice versa.

"It's not that I don't want to," Edward held my hand with his own. "It's just that, your dad is right next door."

I dropped my hand and sat up.

"Edward, he fell asleep hours ago!"

"Yeah, but the walls are thin and I really do not want him to hear us," Edward also sat up. "And this is his house; I would feel like I'm tainting it."

"Ok, well. What if we just do some… heavy petting?" I reached over and lightly dragged my fingers down his chest and closer to my goal. "Or heavy kissing?" I started to climb back over to him.

When my hand reached the edge of the towel, Edward jumped and made a very non-manly sound. He climbed off the bed and adjusted the towel so it would stay tight on him.

"I can't do that either," he shook his head. "I would have to shake your father's hand with my hand, and I can't do that knowing that I touched you with this hand the night before. And the same goes for talking."

I kneeled on the bed, and with my knees, walked my way over to the direction of Edward.

"You cannot be serious here. You have felt me up countless of times, gone down on me, I can't even remember how many times, and yet you can't do this now?" I stuck out my bottom lip and pouted. I reached over and rested my hands on his shoulders. "Edward, I really want you."

"I'll cry rape," Edward looked like he was trying really hard to only look into my eyes. "And there's a sheriff next door, so you just be careful there; and no means no."

I rolled my eyes. I jumped off the bed walked to the door. "Fine. I'm going to go take a shower and take care of it myself. Think about _that_ while you wait out here."

I heard a groan as I walked into the hallway, and not a happy groan.

That night Edward made a very detailed promise of what he was going to do to me when we got back to Seattle, which made me behave for the rest of the night and a very happy camper the next day.

I was supposed to get ready at Angela's house, and Edward was going to get ready at Charlie's and drive over with him; something that neither of my men were looking forward to.

The extra groomsmen crisis was solved after everyone left last night, and Ben agreed to have one of Angela's cousins be the groomsmen making it even.

Tanya was already in the room where we were all supposed to be getting dressed throwing a little hissy fit.

"You!" she glared at me the moment I walked in. "You're friend ruined my dress; it looks like I'm pregnant!"

Sure enough, Alice had worked her magic and sown the dress so that there was a little puff right in front of her lower abdomen. I had to fight back a laugh and smiled as innocently as I could.

"I'm sorry Tanya; too bad we don't have enough time to fix it." I smiled sweetly. "But hey, the color looks good on you."

Tanya kept pitching a fit about her dress, but when Angela showed up to put on her wedding dress, Brittany told Tanya to shut it.

Angela looked beautiful. Her dress was nothing like Alice's, who had an outrageously poofy dress. Angela's dress was a simple white dress that hung easily and matched her slim figure. There weren't many designs on it, but what it had on the trimming was enough.

There was a collected intake of breath when we saw Angela in the finished product. I'll admit I got a little teary eyed.

Angela went to go have a private talk with her mom before the wedding, and Brittany went to get her camera out of the charger in the next room, leaving me with my new best friend.

I felt like I was doing a pretty good job at ignoring her. After all didn't I just tell Charlie if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything? And this is Angela's day, so she really does not need any kind of stupid drama; as long as Tanya doesn't say or do anything to piss me off.

"God, I need to get laid," I heard Tanya say from behind me.

I didn't say anything; maybe she was just talking out loud to herself.

"That guy you were with yesterday, he's really not your boyfriend is he?" She asked in a condescending tone.

I took a breath before turning around to look her in the eye. "Yes, he is my boyfriend."

She shrugged and started to walk around the room, looking at all of the pictures. "I saw two other really hot guys here too. One really tall and had a bunch of muscles and dark brown hair, the other was tall too but on the leaner side with blond hair. But when I saw him, he basically ran away from me." She frowned, but kept walking."He's probably gay."

"Those two guys are my best friends. The dark haired one is here with his girlfriend, and the other is here with his _wife_." Of course she was one of _those _girls who thinks that the only reasonable explanation for a guy to reject her is because he's gay. Just another charming quality to add on the growing list.

"I've dated a few married guys," Tanya kept talking as if I had cared or wanted to know. "They're not as hard to get with as people may think," she let out a laugh that made me sick to my stomach. She seriously doesn't care if a guy is married or not. If anything she probably likes the challenge.

Tanya looked over at me and with a smile that implied that there was more meaning behind her words. "To bad you're guy is already taken."

_Yeah, he's not interested in disease- infested caverns!_ I wanted to yell that at her, but Brittany came rushing in telling us it was time for the wedding.

Even with her weak threat, Tanya didn't stop me from enjoying the wedding.

I really was not worried about her. She didn't try to hide who or what she was, and Edward had already seen first hand how she could be. Plus I haven't seen her look at Edward even once so that made me relived enough.

But what it all really comes down to is how much I trust Edward. I know he wouldn't do anything with her, and that he was completely in love with me. I could be the overbearing girlfriend, and keep telling him to stay away from her, or to not even look at her; but what good would that do me? It would just piss him off, and make Edward think that I didn't trust him. By the time the wedding reception was in full swing, I had completely forgotten about her.

Edward had demanded that we go out and dance, and he didn't care if I did step on his toes or not. It was obvious he had a few drinks, nothing to make him drunk, but definitely loosen him up. Maybe he wouldn't mind some heavy petting tonight…

Alice was in an intense conversation with Aunt Linda and Aunt Anna about clothes in the 70's, leaving Jasper without a partner. Edward ran off to go use the rest room, so Jasper decided to attempt to dance with me.

We had danced together before, and he knew how dangerous it could be, but we still had fun.

"So how's married life going for you?" I asked him while we danced.

Jasper had this silly grin on his face. "Even better then I had imagined."

I couldn't help but smile while I thought about how perfect my two friends were matched.

"Alice wants to start trying to have a baby," Jasper's grin grew into a wide smile.

"Really!" I squealed. "That's amazing Jasper! You guys are going to be wonderful parents."

"I know Alice had a lot of energy," Jasper's eyes wondered to where Alice was sitting. "But I've seen her with kids before, and she calms down and is surprisingly patient."

"So it's possible that in a year from now you're going to be a dad?" I asked with a smile.

Jasper beamed. "Yeah, I guess it is."

The song ended and I looked around for Edward.

"Is he still in the bathroom?" Jasper asked, not needing to know who I was looking for.

"Maybe, I'm going to go look for him." All of that love talk Jasper was doing just now had me wanting my love.

I walked back into the house, and the noise from outside was slightly shut off with the doors closed. We were pretty lucky that it hadn't rain, and at the last minute changed it to an outdoor wedding.

I went to the down stairs restroom, but a child's voice answered when I knocked so I went to the upstairs restroom in the master bedroom. When I opened the door, I wanted to scream.

Edward was kissing Tanya.

I want to cry, I wanted to run, I wanted to go over and beat the crap out of Edward. But instead I stood there and watched. This wasn't right, Edward loved me, and he wants to be with me. I trust him, and wouldn't do that.

And he wasn't. Edward wasn't kissing Tanya. Tanya was kissing Edward, and Edward pulling his face away trying to push her off. She obviously wasn't a heavy girl, but Edward being the gentleman that he is, wasn't going to out right push her.

"No, stop it! I told you to get the fuck off of me." Edward finally lost his cool and with not much force pushed her. Tanya landed on the bed, right in front of him; legs open and all.

"Edward," I called out, and both pairs of eyes looked right at me.

Tanya immediately wrapped her legs around Edward, who started to push off her legs and get out of her grasp. She also hiked up her dress to make it look as if they had been fooling around.

"Oh Edward," Tanya made her voice try to sound all breathy. "I thought you said your girlfriend wouldn't come to find you."

"What?! I never said that!" Edward jumped away from her and rushed over to me. "Bella, I swear, I didn't. Please believe me, you know I wouldn't!"

"Stop," I didn't look at him. "You can't judge me for what happens in the next five minutes."

"What?" Edward asked as I marched right passed him and up to Tanya who was sitting up on the bed with a smug ass smile.

I hated that smile.

So I made it go away.

I punched the bitch.

Tanya screamed and her hands went up to her face. "What the fuck!"

"You think you can come here and hit on _my_ boyfriend, and that he would fall for a skank like you?" My voice was surprisingly calm, and I wasn't even yelling. "You think that just because you spread your legs, guys are going to hop on." I leaned in so that I was close enough to feel her breath. "Hate to break it to you, but he's just not that into you."

I straightened up and turned back to a stunned Edward. As I reached the door Tanya couldn't let me leave without her having the final word.

"Yeah, well, that's not what he said earlier."

I stopped and shook my head. I was done with her.

"And your boyfriend's a good kisser!"

"Oh, hell no." I muttered to myself. I turned back around and with all force I could muster, punched her again.

Tanya went flying on the bed, and I heard a satisfying crack when I punched her.

"Oh, that one hurt!" I cradled my hand to my chest and kept saying "ouch" over and over.

Edward rushed me down stairs, and sat me on the counter while he grabbed some ice.

"You were amazing!" Edward finally said after making sure there was ice on my hand. "But how did you know?"

I looked up to the green eyed man I loved and smiled. "Edward, you're an ass man. If you were into her kiss your hands would be all over her butt, not trying to push her away. Yeah sure, when I opened the door I thought what I saw was you kissing her, but it wasn't you Edward. You're the man who I truly love more than anyone. I know you."

I was rewarded with a kiss that made me all tingly and a of part me wanted to go find a room, while the other part wanted to rub this in Tanya's face.

"I found them! They're just trying to get it on in the kitchen!" Emmett's loud voice boomed, breaking the romance.

Alice, Jasper, and Rose showed up in the kitchen laughing, before Emmett asked about my swelling hand.

"Did you fall down somewhere Bella?" Emmett laughed.

"No, actually I punched Tanya," I shrugged casually.

"You did what?" Emmett's laughter stopped and his mouth dropped.

"Bella found Tanya trying to kiss me, and kicked her ass," Edward grinned proudly.

"I didn't kick her ass, I just punched… twice."

Rose and Alice were hovering around me right away.

"Thank God you did, because I was about to have a smack down with her myself." Rose huffed. "Did you know she grabbed Emmett's ass?"

"Babe, you know I told her that my butt is off limits to everyone but you," Emmett pulled Rose into his chest and kissed her forehead.

"I tried to tell her that I was not interested too," frowned Edward. "But she basically tackled me."

"Then Bella tackled her," Alice laughed.

"I did not tackle her!" I protested.

I ended up needing going to the hospital to get my hand checked. It was just a small fracture, but my friends teased me every step of the way. Emmett kept telling me not to go punching any other people, seeing as I only had one good hand.

Tanya needed to go to the hospital too, and I ended up feeling horrible. She had a broken nose, but luckily she wasn't going to be pressing any kind of charges. She may be an idiot, but at least she was an idiot that knew my dad was the police chief.

I was feeling pretty bad about hitting Tanya, until I saw her walk by the room and made another stupid comment.

I kept apologizing to Angela about having ruined her wedding, but she only laughed and ended up thanking me for having punched Tanya.

"That girl was getting on my last nerve," Angela had said. "And at least now I have a good story to tell when I talk about my wedding."

I was extremely relieved when Edward and I finally made it back to Seattle and were relaxing at home.

We were lying on the couch, not really doing anything, just enjoying the time of it being just the two of us.

"Well this trip was a complete disaster." I finally sighed after replaying everything in my head.

"Why do you say that?" Edward asked, but he seemed more entertained with a lock of my hair that he was playing with.

I lifted my hand, which was wrapped up.

"No, I don't agree with you there," Edward sighed into my ear. "Charlie finally met me as your boyfriend, and not just your friend. I have a few interesting promises I need to fulfill. You were able to get a few more ideas on what you want to do when we get married. And I was able to see exactly how much you trust me."

"Well, when you put it like that…" I smiled and wrapped my arms around him.

"Remember what I told you, when it comes to you and me, no matter what we do it's always perfect."

"Edward, you keep talking like that and it's going to spoil me," I laughed.

"Oh, well in that case," Edward brought his eyebrows together so he looked serious. "Woman, go make me a sandwich…now!"

I kept laughing and stood to go walk to my room. "Oh Edward, you and crazy ways."

"But I really am hungry," I heard him pout.

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**Alright! This chapter was to show you guys how their relationship progressed, and how a big thing in any relationship is trust. We've all read a story or seen a movie where the girl walks in at the wrong time, and she jumps right into conclusions. Well after watching a movie like that not too long ago, I thought to myself "why don't these girl just stay a second or two, and watch to grasp what the hell is going on." Easier said then done, I know, but in this story I made it done. Haha**

**Just wondering, how many AZ readers do I have here? I was at Tempe Market Place the other day and met a reader there randomly, it was awesome haha. So I was just wondering any AZ readers?**

**Fallow me on Twitter. SN: tbjac89**

**We have the last chapter coming up, and it will be call: _Continuing On_**

**I'm sad thinking about it, so I'm not going to think about saying goodbye to you guys until I post the next chapter… so until then**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	30. Continuing On

**So this is the last time I will be do this for Continuing On. It's sad, but here we go. Thank you Belle, you are an awesome Beta.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

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Chapter 30- Continuing On

EPOV:

My Bella was sick. And I get to take care of her.

There was a disturbed part of me that was thriving at getting to take care of her. She had a cold once when we lived together in ignorance of how we really felt, and it was torture not being able to kiss her head or hold her. But now! Now with the title of boyfriend, love of her life, and one day be her husband (here's hoping), I was allowed to take care of my girl and she couldn't do a damn thing about it.

When I explained this to her, she just groaned, told me I was the sick one, and shoved her head under the pillows of our bed. _Our_ bed. _Our_. As in hers and mine… combined. Ours.

I moved in officially on September 4th. I knew where Bella was coming from when she told me that things would be different when I move in, compared to when I lived there last time.

Yeah, the difference was that we could finally have sex whenever we felt like it, and I could kiss her just because I damn well could.

It was different like that, but it also was just different. First was the upgrade in rooms. I had spent time in Bella's room before, but now having the point of view of living in it, I had to say it was a pretty good room. It was big, had it's own small balcony, and the mini hot tub, that Bella called a bath, was amazing. It had jets. How had I not know about this before?

Bella, who had never lived with a boyfriend, kept asking me if she was doing everything right. She had made sure there was enough room in the closet for the both of us, I was shocked seeing how many clothes she actually had. She was going to convert the second bedroom into an office for me. I kept telling her that I didn't need an office, but finally she admitted that it was a room that if I wanted to get away from her for a little while I could. I loved the woman, but sometimes she was crazy.

I told her that there was no need for her to do that, because if I ever wanted to get away from her, I could easily lock her in her closet.

She made room for the little amount of belongings I had, and it was a reminder of how I may be making more money than I thought possible, I still didn't have anything of my own. That thought was depressing.

It was more of a man and ego thing. Now that I was living with Bella, I felt like I needed to provide a good home for her. Hell, the caveman in me wanted to go out and build a home with my own hands. Well, that or get a really good contractor.

Bella, being Bella, was able to convince me and to tell her what was wrong and I felt like an idiot the whole time. But Bella, being Bella, understood me completely. She told me that she was already planning in her mind that once we move out to get our own home, she wanted to sell her furniture and buy new ones with me. I would be able to build a home with Bella.

We had talked about getting married, and we both knew that it would probably be soon. Bella was just waiting for me to ask, and I was waiting for the right moment. I knew what I wanted to do, and I knew what answer I would get; but it didn't stop me from being nervous as hell.

I had never purposed to Lauren. I always thought that we would eventually get married, but I never got down on that one knee and asked her to marry me. This would be a first.

I didn't want to think about that, about the slight possibility (even if it is in my mind) that she would say no, or didn't like how I asked, or the ring.

The familiar nauseating feeling I seemed to be living with came back to me whenever I thought about proposing.

Maybe I should grab some nausea medicine along with Bella's medicine.

Christmas music blared in the background of Walgreen's as I looked through the flu medicine they had to offer. Which seemed better for her? She had a fever, and a stuffy nose… maybe I should also get an icepack? I already have five cans of soup in my basket; I'm going to need a shopping cart.

"Oh my God," a girls voice squeaked next to me. The noise was on a level close to where only dogs could hear, so I was compelled to look at the cause. She was no older than 14, and was taller than Bella. Her hair was the same brown as my Bella's, but this girl had hers impossibly straight. Like many teens her age, she had on simple blue jeans, and layered tops; one blue, one yellow. In her shaking hands, the girl clenched a magazine while she stared at me in awe.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God," the girl chanted. "It's you!" She stuck the magazine out at me. It was an interview I did back in late September for the November issue of Rolling Stone.

It was a really big break moment, and especially since my music is not the type of music they tend to talk about. But after I recorded with Andrew Lloyd Webber, he started talking to a lot of people about me. Then people started Googling me, and Emmett started leaking my songs to classical music radio stations, and then bam; Rolling Stone called.

Bella had flipped out when she heard that. I've never seen her so excited and it wasn't even about her. Yeah, she loved me.

She kept saying that it would be my music that would draw people in, but it would be my looks that kept them.

It took me five minuets before I realized she wasn't joking.

I knew I was good looking, but Bella kept playing me up more so. She has a biased point of view after all. I blew off what she was trying to tell me, until I showed up at the photo shoot with Bella. (I had been to her photo shoot after all.)

Loftus was there again for this photo shoot, looking just as… interesting as last time. He was thrilled to see Bella and I again, and was even more delighted to hear that we were together.

And after a few pictures Loftus told me to take my shirt off. I thought he was just kidding around, but the photo shoot director told me that it was a must.

Bella had a smug smile the whole time.

I was not used to interviews like Bella, but I felt like I was able to hold my own. I gave them my basic background. The story didn't seem interesting, but the journalist there thought it was amazing how I had tried to suppress my musical talents, as he said, for so many years. And how it wasn't until I decided to change my life and leave Portland (I didn't tell the reason why I left or changed my life). And of course we talked a little bit about Bella.

"You really are Edward Masen right?" the young girl brought me out of my thoughts.

"Yes I am," I smiled broadly. It had happened a few times, being approached by people; and each time kept me smiling for the rest of the day.

"Oh my God!" she squealed again and ran up to me. "Please, please sign this for me!" She started to rummage through her denim purse.

"Sure," I smiled broadly. "What's your name?"

"Antonia, but I go by Toni," she nodded. "T.O.N.I"

"Who knew that playing the piano would work out for you Eddie," the last voice I wanted to hear called out behind me.

"Oh my God," gasped Toni. "It's Jacob Black."

I turned around slowly, while all of my memories of him came back quickly. I hated this man. He hated me. And by the look in his eyes as he stood there with his hands in his jean pockets and a long sleeve green shirt, I could tell I still wasn't his favorite person.

"Yeah, the 'piano thing' has been _really_ been working out," I raised the Rolling Stone magazine I was holding. "As you can clearly see."

"One photo shoot, and already your ego can't handle it," he shook his head; a mocking smile played on his mouth.

"One photo shoot and a list of people who want to write for them that's longer than this years winning streak for you guys," I shrugged casually.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's getting you _all_ the girls," Jacob rolled his eyes.

"Like he would care how many girls are after him," Toni piped up; surprising both Jacob and me.

"What's up little girl?" Jacob looked at Toni with a friendly smile.

Toni rolled her eyes, probably not appreciating being called a 'little girl'. "Please, I know all about you both."

Jacob and I both looked at her with a questioning gaze. I was a music composer, and Jacob is an NBA player; not exactly similar interests.

Toni rolled her eyes again at the both of us and let out an exasperated breath. "Isabella Swan is my favorite writer of all time. I love that woman!" Toni actually squealed at the thought of Bella.

"When I heard she was going out with you," Toni nodded her head at Jacob. "I did some research to see who you are. And when I saw you" she grinned at me. "In Cosmo awhile ago with Bella, I looked you up and became a fan."

Point for me! She didn't say she became a fan of Jacob's.

"Anyway, weren't you two just roommates back when she did Cosmo?" Toni asked.

Jacob let out a laugh that sounded more like a bark to me. "Roommates, and _just friends_." He looked at me. And although we both knew that he wasn't with Bella anymore, I cold tell he was trying to tell me that he won.

"Obviously you don't read much," Toni interrupted our thoughts. I liked this girl more and more. "Because if you did, you would know that he and Bella are actually together. And way more serious than you and her ever were."

Never mind, I loved this girl!

Jacob's smile faded some, but he still had a small grin. "So you guys finally got together, huh?"

My jaw dropped; that wasn't exactly what I was expecting from him.

"What?" I sounded just as dumbfounded as I felt.

Jacob threw his head back and laughed. "From the moment I met you I knew you were after her."

"Yeah, and you were pretty inconvenient with my pursuit," I frowned.

"Not really," for the first time Jacob's lighthearted appearance dropped. "On date one I knew I didn't stand a chance to her," Jacob lifted his finger to make air quotes. "'Extraordinary' roommate. She kept talking about you through out our whole first date."

Since Bella and I got together I had wanted to call up Jacob, and rub it in his face that Bella and I were together. And not just the type of together he and Bella were; but the kind of together that she and I both know we are going last.

Sure I would never call Jacob up, but I had hoped to get an opportunity like this. In my mind the scene that would have played out where Jacob threw a tempter tantrum and eventually admit that I was the better man.

I was _not_ prepared for Jacob to look like a defeated man without me having to show off.

"Then why did you go out with her?" If he knew from the beginning that Bella liked me, before even Bella herself, then why the hell would he have kept dating her?

"I like a challenge," Jacob shrugged and his cocky smile came back. "Plus after I met you, I like how much it pissed you off."

"So you used Bella?" Whatever pity I may have felt was immediately gone. Not only did he use Bella to piss me off; but also thinking how much time was wasted on Jacob when I could have been pursuing Bella properly…

"Hey I did like her," Jacob defended, furrowing his brows. "I'm not a complete asshole!" Jacob softened his expression and nodded his head to Toni; who was standing in shock as this confrontation went down. "Sorry about the language."

"It's cool," she gaped at us.

"Anyways," Jacob sighed and brought his attention back to me. "I did care about Bella. She's a good girl."

There wasn't really anything for me to say to that. "So what are you doing here?" I asked instead.

"Well, I'm out of toothpaste and sinus medicine," Jacob pinched the bridge of his nose. "You see the pressure is just killing me right around here…"

I rolled my eyes and cut him off. "That wasn't what I was asking you. Seattle isn't your normal place to be." On the off-season of basketball, I had learnt that he likes to spend most of his time on the East coast.

"Yeah well the Seattle people here love me, and I have a few interviews to do through out the town." He leaned back casually in a way that made me want to punch him in the face.

"But since I'm in town, I'm thinking maybe I should go say hi to Bella," Jacob grinned at me. "For old times sake."

"No way!" Toni yet again surprised us. "There's no way you can go back together with Bella; she's with Edward!"

"It's alright Toni," I seemed to have gotten her attention by saying her name. "Jacob here is just being a jerk and is trying to mess with me."

"Yeah, I wouldn't really try to break them up." Jacob seemed uncomfortable under the 14 year olds glare.

"I don't care," Toni kept up her glower. "You better not mess with them. I'm team Edward."

I started laughing at that, and Toni blushed reminding me very much of _my_ own Bella.

"The Seattle people have spoken," I patted Toni on her shoulders. "And it seems that team Edward wins."

I smiled at Jacob, but not in a cocky 'I win' way. I smiled like a man who had everything they wanted in the world, and can't even be mad at a formal rival.

Jacob seemed to have gotten the secret-man-message that everything was cool on this end. He smiled back, showing that everything was cool on his end too.

Who knew that I would make peace with Jacob Black? This whole being in love thing and having everything that is perfect was really working for me. But he was still an asshole.

Jacob bowed out with one last nod to me and an approving smile to Toni. I in turn felt like I couldn't leave Toni with just an autograph, I felt like that wasn't even anything, so I got her e-mail and promised her that Bella would e-mail her sometime. Toni finally reached the level of squealing that only dogs can hear.

I was in a particularly happy mood when I came dancing into the apartment after picking up the rest of my take-care-of-Bella shopping list. I went straight to the kitchen to warm up some soup before I went to check on Bella.

Walking into our bedroom, you would have thought it was a wake. The drapes were closed blocking out unseasonable bright sunlight from outside, yet there was still a slight glow from the edges of the drapes, which provided the only light in the room. There were tissues scattered all through out the floor on Bella's side of the bed, along with tissues draped around the huddled little ball that was Bella as if they were white flowers decorating a body.

When I opened the door, the light from the living room cascaded into the bedroom causing Bella to groan and pull the covers over her head.

"Bella… love, I made you some soup," I waked in quietly with the tray in my hands.

"Is it edible?" she mumbled in a hoarse voice.

I grinned. I had become a better cook since I tried to win her back in my life all those months ago. She knew it, but being sick made her cranky.

"It's straight from the can; all I had to do was warm it up." I walked carefully to the bed, making sure not to spill any soup.

I sat down next to Bella, and looked down. "Babe, you got to get up."

"But I'm all snotty and gross," she moaned and burrowed herself under the covers.

I leaned over and started to stroke her hair that popped out from under the covers. "But last night you didn't have any issues using me as your own tissue."

Bella pushed the cover down suddenly and gave me a horrified look. "I didn't…"

I smiled. She looked sick, but still beautiful. "You did, but it's ok. You know how hot I get when I see you all snotty."

Bella rolled her eyes and sat up, reaching for the tray and soup.

"So I had an interesting day." I leaned back on the headboard and wrapped an arm around her. I felt her relax into my side.

"Really?" she tore a piece of her bread. "What happened?"

"Well first, I had another fan come up and ask for an autograph," I grinned like a crazy man. I don't think I can ever get use to that.

"Was it another guy trying to hit on you?" Bella smirked at me.

Not even two weeks ago I had this man come up to me, asking for an autograph. I didn't think anything of it until he started stroking my arm, and giving me what he called his "bedroom eyes". Bella just sat back and watched trying not laugh when the guy pinched my butt as he left.

"No not another guy," I grimaced at the thought. "No, it was a 14 year old girl who is apparently a big fan of yours."

Bella looked up from her soup and beamed. "I like your interesting day."

"Oh it gets better," I grinned. "I ran into Jacob Black."

Bella froze and looked at me with a horror-struck gaze. She put down her spoon and reached up to take my face with both of her hands and turned my head so she could see the sides of my face.

"Well, it doesn't look like you've been in a fight," she muttered thoughtfully.

I laughed and pulled my face away from her hands. "How do you know that I didn't beat the crap out of him and he didn't even lay a hand on me?"

Bella raised an eyebrow at me.

"Ok, we didn't fight, but it was definitely an interesting conversation." I went back to stroking Bella's hair while she ate.

"Please tell me you guys talked about football or anything else that doesn't involve me."

"But you are such an enticing subject," I winked at her.

Bella shook her head, but I saw she was trying to hide a smile.

"He gave me crap at first, but we actually made peace."

Bella looked up at me, her mouth in the shape of an O. "What?"

"I mean we're not going to go and become best friends," I laughed at her shocked expression. "But if we were to see each other in the future, I don't think a fist fight will break out."

Bella finished her soup and leaned back with a thoughtful look. "I don't know what to say to that," she chuckled to herself. "But I'm happy that you're not going to trying to kill each other."

"See, I can be a mature responsible adult," I hugged her closer to me.

"Says the man who wants to get a batman blanket for the couch," she laughed.

"Batman was the adult," I nodded attempting to have an air of complete seriousness. "Robin was the kid."

BPOV:

Christmas this year was going to be different from last years Christmas, big time. My first shock was when Charlie called. I knew that he wanted to tell me something, but was beating around the bush to actually tell me. After 20 minutes went by and Charlie still hadn't made his point, I called him out on his evasiveness. The chief hated being called evasive.

Apparently he would be spending this Christmas with Sue Clearwater. I could practically hear him blush with how much I was teasing him. By what I was able to get out of Charlie was that they had been dating for about six months now. Even though Charlie didn't call it dating; he categorized it as 'spending time together'. Yeah right.

"So are you saying that the two of you were _spending time together_ when Edward and I were there for Angela's wedding?" He couldn't see the grin on my face, but I tried to make my voice sound shocked.

He sounded unsure of his own answer. "Well… yeah, I guess you can say…"

I cut him off. "So when you showed up to the door with a _gun_ to greet Edward and me, you were actually seeing Sue Clearwater?"

I wished we were talking online right now, with a camera, so I can see just how red I was making Charlie.

"Bells, when you say it like that…" He sighed. "I'm sorry, I should have told you about her sooner."

Right then Edward walked into the living room and plopped down right next me on the couch and smiled.

I smiled back.

"It's cool dad," my voice was light and I'm sure Charlie could tell that I was smiling. "I'm happy about you and Sue, it's about damn time. I'll drive over in January and cook us a… belated Swan Christmas dinner."

"Sounds cool kids," Charlie laughed.

"Wait, is that your dad?" Edward started to crawl over me and grabbed my cell right from my hands. "Hey Charlie!"

Ever since Angela's wedding, Charlie and Edward had turned into best friends. I should be happy that the two men in my life got along, but when they started talking about football like this, I had to leave.

The second surprise was that no one else in our group was going to visit their family. Normally every year we went our separate ways to celebrate with our family. But this year Alice and Jasper wanted to spend their first Christmas/Hanukkah together as a married couple alone; away from (as Alice had put it) her "crazy, jealous, still has her pregnancy fat" little sister. It was a loving bond those two siblings have.

Emmett normally stays behind with Rosalie to spend Christmas with his parents. Rose's parents loved getting a tan last year in the Bahamas during the holiday, that they decided they were turning it into their new tradition.

But Rose was more than happy to be spending time with Carlisle and Esme; especially with them freaking out about being grandparents.

I remember on Monday, December 14th, Rose and Emmett called an emergency meeting. The last time an emergency meeting went down it was when Jasper had told us he needed to get surgery for his appendix, and he asked if we could help out in his recovery. So we all knew that whatever the emergency meeting was about, it was going to be important.

Edward had never been to an EM before (Emmett oh-so cleverly came up with the name,) so he was a little weary of what would happen.

Since Rose and Emmett called the meeting, we all met up at their apartment. With them combining both of their salaries, they had a _very _nice penthouse. The furniture was huge, because Emmett had insisted that he wanted to be able to sleep on his couch and not have to worry about falling off. So if Emmett could fit comfortably on this thing, then I was like a child whose feet can't even reach the ground. I couldn't even look at Alice without laughing.

There were Christmas decorations up throughout the place, a permanent smell of gingerbread; the one thing Rose can cook.

Edward and I sat on one side of the enormous couch, me tucked comfortably in his side and Jasper and Alice mimicking our posture on the other end of the couch. Emmett had his arm around Rose, where they stood front and center.

I was trying to make out what they were going to tell us by the look on their face, but neither of them was making eye contact with any of us.

Finally Alice spoke up for us. "Just spit it out already!"

Rose glowed. "I'm pregnant!"

It took a solid heartbeat before Alice and I had processed what she said, and when we did, the neighbors must have thought the fire alarms went off we were screaming so loud.

Alice and I gently tackled Rose (she is pregnant after all) and showered her with kisses and hugs. The guys stood up and started patting and hugging Emmett, offering their congratulations.

Alice was on her knees and pressed her face up close to Rose's flat stomach. "Hello baby!" Alice cooed. "This is your Aunt Alice, you are going to be so stinking cute!"

"With our genes?" Emmett laughed. "He's going to be a little heartbreaker."

"How do you know it's going to be a boy?" Edward pointed out with a grin.

Jasper picked up what he was doing and went on. "Yeah, what if it's a little girl? Still want her to be a heartbreaker?"

Emmett's smile dropped. He didn't look at any of us, instead he walked to where his coat was hanging over a chair, and put it on.

"Rose, I'm going out." His voice was all business.

Rose was stunned. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to buy a gun. Can you imagine how many boys will be after our daughter?" Emmett started walking to the door.

Edward and Jasper broke out laughing, and Rose glared at them. "When I fix this, you guys are dead." She ran to the door. "Emmett, baby! You don't need to buy a gun!"

I slinked an arm around Edward and rested my head while we watched Rose trying to persuade Emmett that he was scary enough without a gun.

"You know karma is going to come back and bight you in the ass?" I laughed.

"Oh yeah?" he looked down at me with a challenging smile.

"Now we're probably going to have only girls," I teased.

Edward's smile grew at the thought of our future kids. "Nah, I've got some manly sperm. But I wouldn't mind having a little mini Bella."

I just smiled. What else can you do when life is going so good?

"But Jasper!" Alice put her hands on her hips.

"We'll get you a dog," Jasper ran his hand through his hair, a trait I noticed he picked up from Edward.

"I don't want a dog," Alice's face grew serious.

"I blame Emmett for this," he sighed. "If Rose wasn't pregnant, then you wouldn't be asking for a baby right now."

"Jasper, can we at least talk about it?" Who knew Alice would be the rational side of this argument?

Jasper didn't say anything, but his look clearly said no.

"Alright," Alice gathered up her purse and jacket. "No talk, no baby making practice."

That got his attention. Three days later they came to an agreement that they would start trying in about four months. When I asked why four months, that lead to emergency meeting number two.

This time we were at Alice and Jasper's place. Edward and I shared the love seat, with my legs in his lap, while Emmett and Rose were nestled on the couch.

Rose had managed to calm Emmett down enough so that he only bought a paintball gun, instead of a real gun; at least until they found out the sex of the baby.

Alice cleared her throat to get our attention. "Jasper and I have gather you here today to discuss a very important issue!"

"She scars me a little," Edward whispered in my ear.

"She scares me a lot," I giggled.

Alice looked like a teacher who just found her students cheating on a test.

"Sorry," I bit my lip so I wouldn't laugh. "We'll be good."

"This involves the both of you just so you know!" Alice nodded.

"What is it then?" Rose looked a little green. She was going through some major morning sickness. She would get pissed when we called it that too, yelling that it didn't just happen in the mornings. She went so far as to write some stern e-mails to the authors of her baby expecting books.

"Where are we going to live?" Alice asked simply.

I said the first thing that came to me. "Are you guys homeless?" It was not one of my shining moments to be sitting in my best friend's apartment, knowing that they're both employed and making a pretty good living off of it, then ask them if they were homeless.

"And I thought I was supposed to be the blond one," Rose laughed, followed by everyone else's laughter.

I blushed in embarrassment and felt Edward's arms tighten around me. "You all suck." I mumbled.

"What I mean Bella," Alice went on. "Is that we all can't live in the city for the rest of our lives."

"She's right," Rose sighed. I noticed that she unconsciously placed her hands over her stomach. "We're not going to raise our baby in the city."

"Nor will Jasper and I," Alice nodded.

I turned to Edward. "What do you say? Want to have city babies, or suburban babies?"

"As long as they are not Forks babies, I'll be happy." Edward grinned.

"Amen to that." I liked Forks in its own way, but I sure as hell am not going to go back and live there. "So where to Alice?"

"That's the whole point of this meeting," Alice looked at me. "To see where we all want to live."

"So you are telling me that you have not already picked out a place for all of us to move to, so that we are all still within walking distance of each other, and in a safe neighborhood?" I raised an eyebrow. "Come on Alice, cough it up."

Alice let out a defeated sigh and reached toward a big binder that had multiple sheets of paper. "I did leave you guys _some _options."

"Bellevue," Emmett read off of the paper Alice just handed him. "That's only thirty minuets from here."

"And it has one of the best school systems," Jasper nodded. Looks like he was getting on the whole having a baby bandwagon.

"I'm assuming here that you guys want to live close to us and each other." For the first time I ever met Alice, she looked uncertain. "I get it if guys want to go somewhere else, and build your own life kind of a thing. I understand. I'm sorry if I'm assuming too much here. It's just that Jasper and I agreed to move into a house first before we build a home and start trying to have kids. So, I'm going to start looking after the new years."

"You guys can go home and discuss this, we don't need to hear an answer right away or anything," Jasper explained.

"But just remember every minute you guys waste and hold back, is a minute I'm not getting pregnant," added Alice. "Just thought you should know."

I had never really put too much thought about where I wanted to live. I was comfortable in my apartment when I thought I wasn't going to find anyone, but now with Edward, it all felt different.

"What do you think of Bellevue?" I asked Edward. We made it home and had some leftovers for dinner while we just laid around the living room; lost in our own thoughts.

"Well I already looked into some places that we could move to, and Bellevue was one of my top picks." Edward shrugged casually.

So he had thought about our future. About moving, starting a family, raising our kids, and growing old… I think he was missing something there. And that would be the ring on my finger.

Who knew I was such a traditionalist? But I just kept thinking of that country song I heard in Sweet Home Alabama that said, "no huggy, no kissy, 'till I get a wedding ring!"

But I didn't want to be one of those girls bugging him to get married when we haven't even been together for a year yet. Or even one of those girls who force their man into getting married. I know that's where Edward wanted us to head, but when?

Please don't let him be one of those guys that will stay with their woman for years, have kids with them, but not marrying them until the last years of their life.

What was it that Renee always would say? If you were giving the milk away for free, why would he buy the cow?

I'm thinking I'm the cow here.

Was it a bad move to move in with Edward, if that meant he would get comfortable living with me, but never want to marry me? Damn it, I saw Alice's wedding, and Angela's and I'm sure Rose is going to want to get married before she has the baby. When will it be my turn?

I am having such a girl moment, but I don't care.

That night I went to bed frustrated with myself, frustrated with Edward, and frustrated with how naked my ring finger felt.

For the next couple of days Edward could tell that I was in a funk; and he tried to get me to tell him. But I couldn't tell him, not just yet, and I tried to go back to focusing on spending time with Edward, only Edward, on Christmas Eve. I liked the idea of having him all of him to myself when Christmas Eve turned into Christmas. It was the holiday that I always felt that you should be with the ones that you love, family and friends. And that is what Edward is to me. He is my best friend, and the love of my life; I wouldn't want to spend this Christmas any other way.

On Christmas Eve I had an informal dinner at the apartment, where Edward and I told Alice and Jasper that we also wanted to live at Bellevue. When Emmett heard this he ran up and wrapped Alice and I in a hug, telling us that he and Rose also wanted to live close with all of us. Carlisle and Esme showed up, surprising us that they decided they were going to buy a small weekend place over in Bellevue too, so they could be closer to their grandchild.

Rose looked relieved hearing that Esme would be only a short phone call away for any help.

"Alice, Bella." Esme caught our attention. "You both know how much I adore you girls. And I know that both of your mothers do not live near by, so I want you both to call me with any help; baby or otherwise."

"Thank you Esme," I smiled and hugged her.

Alice also hugged Esme. "I would thank you Esme, but I don't have a baby to ask you for help with." Alice glanced over at Jasper. "Because a certain _someone_ hasn't gotten me pregnant yet."

"Hey, you agreed to wait till we move" Jasper defended.

"Come on, do you think moving will take 9 months?" Alice snorted. "Damn it Jasper, prego my eggo!"

"Oh yeah Alice," Rose laughed. "You're going to get him all hot and bothered with that kind of dirty talk."

Alice and Jasper laughed, kissed, and everything was good again.

Dinner was fun, and very relaxing. We talked about things that made me feel older, like a real adult; mortgages, babies, and (God forbid) minivans. Emmett and Rose were planning on getting married in March. And surprisingly, she wanted to do a small wedding. But I didn't mind talking about it all. I was excited. My life was changing, but I'm ready for it.

Everyone left around ten, with kisses and hugs and plans about the "great migration," as Emmett put it.

Edward wouldn't let me go to sleep quite yet. He grabbed a bottle of wine, started the fireplace that I had hardly ever used, and grabbed me so I could tuck into his side on the couch.

We didn't talk. We didn't do anything more than light sweet kisses. And we didn't need to do anything else. The sound of the crackling fire, and the calm from the wine was putting me to sleep; but each time Edward would stop me.

At around 11:30 Edward stood and told me to get my jacket and shoes on. I asked where we were going, but Edward just told me to put them on and kissed my forehead. I didn't argue.

I grabbed my midnight blue jacket that had cost me a pretty penny, but I loved completely. It was long and stylish with big buttons going down the front, but it still managed to keep me warm without making me look bulky.

I met Edward at the door and he was wearing his own black stylish trench coat. I loved this jacket on him. It fitted him well and was long enough to reach his knees. He managed to wear it without looking like a guy about to flash you, although I really wouldn't mind.

He wrapped his arm around me, and made sure my hat covered my ears. He looked a little sick, but I knew that Edward had made up his mind about wanting to go out, so I didn't say anything.

When we stepped outside I gasped. Everything was white, from the street, to the sidewalks, to the light posts, and any other surface that the snow was able to reach with its landing.

Seattle was a pretty big city, and always had some type of life going on. Even late at night there was always some car, some person moving. But maybe because it was Christmas Eve, there wasn't a single soul out here other than Edward and I.

The light from the street lamps made the snow seem to have light shining from within it. The bright and clear moon cast a type of glow that only it's milk white shine could create, projecting the scene of magic.

And it felt like magic (as corny as I felt thinking about it), but that's what it seemed. It was only Edward and I in the world right now. And I wouldn't have had it in any other way.

I didn't realize where Edward was taking me to, until I saw the entrance of a park. I felt my lip slip into a smile. It was the same park where he had tried to carry me over the mini lake puddle.

We started to slow down and I looked around to see that with the shade of night, it felt like trees surrounded us; yet it was all still illuminated. I looked up to see the moon directly right above us, keeping us still in its affectionate glow.

Finally Edward stopped and opened his coat. I wasn't freezing, but it was cold and I knew what he wanted me to do. So I warped my arms around his body and pressed me self to him tightly so that when he closed his long trench coat it still fit the both of us.

"You know I've come to this park a lot?" Edward's voice sounded loud in the night's silence, although he was speaking just barely above a whisper.

"I used to come here when I first moved in with you," he grinned at me. "When I was too ashamed and messed up to talk it out with you."

I shook my head and opened my mouth to defend him, but he cut me off.

"And then I came here to think about how much of a blessing you really are in my life." I didn't even see his hands, I was too focused on his eyes and words; but I felt his warm fingers brush across my cheeks.

"Then I came here when I finally realized that I loved you, yet I thought that I couldn't have you." He frowned a little at that, so I reached up and tried to smooth away the lines between his furrowed brows.

He grabbed my hand and kissed it.

"I came here when I lost you." He scowled at that. When I tried to pull my hand from out of his, so that I could hold his face, but his grip tightened on me. "And I came here when I found you."

I couldn't move. All I could do was breath and all I could smell was him.

"And now I come here at night thinking how unbelievably lucky I am," he smiled again. "You take me completely, flaws and all. You love entirely, through the good and the bad. You know me wholly, the dark and the light."

He leaned down as if he were to kiss me, but I kept my eyes on his open green eyes as he stopped just an inch short from my lip. In the distance I heard an old church bell start to ring with it's loud and decisive _ding, ding_ letting the world know that it was now Christmas...

"Marry me."

I gasped a little as Edward pulled away from me and got down on one knee and pulled out a small black leather box.

"Bella, I love you. There aren't any words that can help you understand exactly how much I love you; but I can show you. I _will_ show you everyday how much I love you, if you will let me." He paused and opened that box all while keeping his eyes on mine. "Will you marry me?"

For a full five seconds I stood in shock, trying to figure out if this was real. Then I decided I was making this real.

"Yes!" I screamed as I threw myself on him. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." I kept repeating it over and over while Edward showered me with kisses at any place he could reach.

Edward managed to pull the both of us up, but I was latched onto him. Finally I pulled my head back and looked up to see him beaming down at me.

"So that's a yes?" he laughed.

"Yes Edward, I will marry you."

I felt him pull on my left hand and saw him slip on a beautiful ring on my finger. I had seen it only once before, but that was only a quick glance when I had found the box of Edward's belongings. There was a big asscher cut diamond on the center, but not where it was ridiculously big. There were a few smaller rings on either side, but it still looked humble with the white gold ring.

"That last woman who wore this was my mother," Edward smiled at me, but I could tell he missed his parents. "And her mother before that, and before that."

"It's beautiful," I gazed at my ring opened mouthed. "It's perfect."

"No," Edward breathed as he pulled me closer to him again. "This is perfect."

******************

Dear Angela,

I know, I know. I was supposed to write to you when we got back from Europe. I keep telling Edward that if he keeps outdoing himself each year for our anniversary, that he's going to run out of things to give me. I would have been happy with a weekend away to some beach resort, but he demanded that for our 15th year anniversary we go out of the country.

It was amazing! We had so much fun, and there was just so much to see. But hey, you and Ben have been there like a thousand times already, so you know how cool it is there.

The kids are good. Emma's (AKA my mini me) 14th birthday is coming up soon, and I think Edward is going to follow Emmett's lead and buy a gun. I'm not sure I ever told you that story, but when Emmett found out that Rose was pregnant with Katelyn, he went out to buy a gun. It was before he even found out that they were going to have a girl.

But really I can't blame him. Kate has her mom's looks and her dad's sense for trouble, and now that she's getting her permit to drive, they are going to have a fun time with that.

Alice's boys are also getting their permits soon too. Oh you should see them! They are turning out to be really good young men, both in the looks department and manners. It's crazy how different the twins are. Tyler looks more like Alice; dark hair and bright blue eyes, (even though he is much more like Jasper. He's pretty calm.) I always get a kick out of Bret, who looks exactly like Jasper, but has his mom's energy. It's a funny thing to watch.

I haven't said anything to Edward yet, but Emma told me that Bret asked her out on a date! Yes, Alice is already planning the wedding. But really, who hasn't seen this coming for a while now? Alice told me that Tyler actually has a crush on Katelyn, and we all know that Katelyn has liked Tyler since they were two. But Katelyn being just as stubborn as her parents refuses to say anything on that subject other than that she just wants to go out and date whomever. Emmett added another gun to his collection.

Oh yeah, it's better than watching TV.

Luckily we don't have to worry too much over the little ones yet. Edward keeps thinking that Aiden will watch over his big sister, but really the kid is just having fun being a 12 year old, (a 12 year old who is looking more like his father each and every day.) And he's too busy following around Bret and Tyler as if they were the coolest thing that ever happened. It's cute seeing him and Jenny (a compete mix of Alice and Jasper) and Cody (who's going to end up looking just like Emmett) all hang out. Their birthdays are all in August, so you, Ben, and Lilly definitely need to drive down. I don't know how that worked out, for Rose, Alice, and I to all get pregnant at the same time and deliver in the same month. The guys still say we did that on purpose.

Riley is turning into the little daredevil. (Another Edward look-a-like, only girl version) She decided she wanted to go to the Olympics and do the pole vault with a broom. I'll let you imagine. I'm just really lucky that she has Rebecca, (Alice and Jasper's, apparently Jasper has an aunt who has bright red hair and that's who Becca looks like.) Becca is always the one telling Riley to think things through, and not hurt herself. They're only 9!

Then the little, little ones. The other set of twins (Rose's and Emmett's) are just too cute! Peter has his momma's hair, but looks like Carlisle, and Sophie has Emmett's curly hair, but looks like Esme. (You know how happy she was about that.) Their both the same age as Diana now, 6. (It is crazy how much Diana looks exactly half of me, and half of Edward. She won't be able to say we're not related haha). It's really sweet, Kevin, Alice and Jasper's (who also has red-ish hair, but not quite, a lot like Edward's actually, but his face is a lot like Jasper's) is 7, and looks after them like he was their big brother. It's probably because he's the youngest, and he wants his own younger siblings.

Well that covers the kids. It's crazy over here, but that's what makes life interesting you know?

I just sold the right to my _Seer_ book series to make it into a movie! I know you're probably wondering why I didn't say that first, but an e-mail just popped up to say that we officially sold it… OH MY GOD! Wow, I'm really excited!!!

I'll make sure Edward does music for it. It's funny because it's actually really hard to get _the_ Edward Masen to do music for a movie, but seeing as how I'm sleeping with the guy… haha.

Well I've got to go. My husband is going to be home soon from a meeting, and I've been missing him all day ;) Send my love to Ben and Lilly.

-Bella-

P.S-

Sorry, it's just an after thought I had. The kids asked me the other day how their daddy and I met. Haha take a moment and imagine their poor faces while I went into this long, long story. The older ones understood it more then the younger ones. Emma came up and asked me how Edward and I managed to through it all, the love and the hurt. And I told her; life is just a matter of continuing on.

* * *

**I want to thank everyone who has read this story, and reviewed, and who have stuck it out through the bad spelling and the ups and downs of this story. I decided to write on FF, because I was worried that my writing or stories that I've come up with werem't any good, but after writing this story it reminds me how much I really do love to write.**

**You all mean so much to me as my readers, and I wish I could thank each and one of you in person.**

**Toni here, she was based on my cousin who has fallowed along with this story. Thanks Toni, love ya!**

**Alright, now to answer a few questions. Will I write a sequel? No. Their story is done. They are happy, love one another, and trust one another. And when you have that, it makes it hard to come up with a plot.**

**HOWEVER! I will be writing another story. It will be called: "_It's Just Love_" or something along those lines. The description of what it's going to be about goes like this-ish:**

**Growing up, Bella always love movies best known as 'romantic comedies'. There was always a formula to it: meet in a weird yet romantic way, get together, then something goes wrong, then the guy does something to prove his love for the girl and says some kind of really romantic speech. When Bella's best friend, Alice, announces that she's engage, Bella get roped into the wedding planning. Around that time she meets Mr. Right. He's everything a girl can ask for and everything is going perfectly _and_ he is fallowing the formula like all the movies... Now if only the groom's stupid cousin, Edward, would stop making fun of her and actually help her with the wedding like he supposed to do.**

**So yeah. It will be a comedy and OOC, and there won't really be much drama like there was in Continuing On. Stay tuned. fallow me on Twitter my name there is tbjac89**

**Thank you all again, and I really do love you all!**

**I hope you enjoyed :)**


	31. Alert not a real chapter sorry

Sorry guys, I hate it when other stories do this, but I'm going to do it now.

But here is an alert/update I have a new story, and I just posted the first chapter

If you liked my humor in **Continuing On**, then you are going to love **It's Just Love**.

Please and give it a chance.

Thanks! :)

-jac-

i will delete this chapter (update) thing in the next few days. Sorry again.


	32. I'm Back People

Hey all, long time no see, hear, write, or whatever. I'm sorry to be doing this, but if you like my style of writing then you should check out my blog. It's about my life, and the eternal questions that we women obsess about. I can't promise anything epic or hilarious but it won't hurt to try it out. I'm in my last semester of University and don't have time to write a story on here, but I do have time for brief writing therapy. I'm convinced that no one reads it, which makes me a tad bit more honest, therefore interesting right? Anyway, here is a link: sorry, I can't figure out how to post a link, but delete the spaces between the three lines. Sorry again, i suck basically, i just suck at links and stuff.

jac-whatireallydontknow

.blogspot

.com

Fallow me on Twitter, where I post the new entries: tbjac89

Hope you all enjoy it or are able to at least walk away knowing that you aren't the only one in the world who thinks these crazy things.


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